Latest / STOPTIME: Live in the Moment. / 💡 Is It Perfectionism or Fear of Failing That Holds You Back?
Transcript
- 0:23Speaker 1: I think that's a really common thing.
- 0:25Speaker 1: I know that's a really common thing for creative people and people in general to hold themselves back because they're afraid it won't be good enough.
- 0:32Speaker 1: And I think there's a limiting belief there about well finishing.
- 0:41Speaker 1: I mean, nothing's ever really finished right?
- 0:44Speaker 1: If I let that come in as my primary thought pattern, I wouldn't have finished the book right.
- 0:46Speaker 1: I mean, if I like let that come in as my primary thought pattern, I wouldn't have finished the book right?
- 0:50Speaker 1: We all have that.
- 0:51Speaker 1: I mean it's interesting because I wonder if you have a and anybody really, as you guys are listening to this the distinction between high standards and the value of doing good work versus being good enough.
- 1:08Speaker 1: Do you see how they're very different and yet so similar?
- 1:12Speaker 2: I'd never thought about it that way, Because I do have.
- 1:17Speaker 2: I think I have high standards.
- 1:19Speaker 1: But that's a value, right, like I could say.
- 1:21Speaker 1: I could ask you why is that important to you?
- 1:23Speaker 1: You have high standards.
- 1:24Speaker 1: That's not, I'm sure, because you want to be hard on yourself.
- 1:27Speaker 1: It's because what?
- 1:31Speaker 2: Because some things are important to me.
- 1:34Speaker 2: My dignity is important to me, and the way that people perceive me is important to me.
- 1:50Speaker 1: Integrity I guess that's the word I'm looking for.
- 1:52Speaker 1: Yes, that's integrity is yes, that's screaming loud and strong.
- 1:56Speaker 1: And it's interesting because it took you a while to get there, because when you first said it, you know well, because I care about you didn't say my reputation, dignity, you said you know I care about my dignity.
- 2:08Speaker 1: That implies that you'd somehow lose your dignity if you you know what I mean if you didn't do it well, which is interesting.
- 2:13Speaker 1: So that's fear-based, right, I get it, we all do.
- 2:16Speaker 1: We all want to be dignified, we all want to be respected in the world, right.
- 2:21Speaker 1: But that can be fear-based and that can really get in the way.
- 2:24Speaker 1: A conscious-based thing, which is integrity, which is something that you control and nobody else does.
- 2:30Speaker 1: You can control that.
- 2:31Speaker 1: So there's no need to be fearful of not being good enough if you know that you're going to give it your best, because you can't control the rest.
- 2:40Speaker 1: You can't control what people say.
- 2:41Speaker 2: Right and that is something that I am learning very much, especially in the last year is I don't have control over anybody else, so I just need to let it go 100%, just let it go.
- 3:08Speaker 1: You want to let it go, right, and when you want to let it go, it's like I get to, which is choice with gratitude.
- 3:13Speaker 1: Just let it go Right.
- 3:16Speaker 1: Go for it.
- 3:17Speaker 1: Not because Lisa told you to, you know, not because you're going, I'm going to let go.
- 3:21Speaker 1: You're just because you get to.
- 3:23Speaker 2: Right, it's like you have.