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Small Talk · Let's Ask the Mamas!

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We got a question for American mama's. Dear mamas, have
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: we as Americans lost the ability to have small talk?
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Well, let's ask our American mama's.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: And joining us now our American mama Terry Naville, Terry,
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: you look lovely today.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: Thank you? How was your weekend? You have a good weekend?
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: Rested?
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: Is this small talk?
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  Speaker 1: How the kids the family good?
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  Speaker 3: Yet?
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: They're so good?
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
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  Speaker 1: And did Kevin like the bottle of whiskey that we got?
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  Speaker 3: Yes?
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  Speaker 2: Okay, thank you for that. He loved it. Okay, so
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: the answers, no, we haven't.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: We're good. All right, Well, if you'd like to ask
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: for American but seriously, this question. It is sometimes hard
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: to to have conversations with people, especially when politics seems
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: to sneak into everything.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, try to stay away from politics.
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  Speaker 3: Ok yeah.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Some people hate small they absolutely hate it.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: They think it's there's no point, you're just wasting time
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  Speaker 3: and energy, when it's actually the appetizer to the main course.
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  Speaker 3: It's truly an art. It's almost a lost art because
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  Speaker 3: of our phone, you know, because you'll you'll find people
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  Speaker 3: maybe even have you ever gone to a wedding where
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  Speaker 3: you're at the reception and you're sitting at your assigned
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  Speaker 3: seat and you around a lot of people that you
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  Speaker 3: don't know.
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  Speaker 2: Some people just get on their phone. No, no, no, it is.
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  Speaker 3: There's an art to small talk, and it's not about
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  Speaker 3: trying to come up with something clever to say. It's
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  Speaker 3: it's more about trying to show interest in somebody and
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: making a moment comfortable because it can be awkward, you know.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: I find it's important to start off with a question, right,
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  Speaker 1: and then listen yes, and find a bridge, yes, find
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  Speaker 1: where you can have a connection, like, well, how are
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  Speaker 1: you doing. You're doing okay?
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  Speaker 3: Great?
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  Speaker 1: You got any kids?
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've got three kids.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: I got a kid in middle school. Oh, I remember
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: when my kids were in middle school. How's this thing?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, you mastered the art of it. That's you have
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  Speaker 3: mastered the art of small talk. But I was talking
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: to I was actually talking to Summer about this because
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  Speaker 3: she was my shy of the three of them. Yes,
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: she was more of my of the shy one. And
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  Speaker 3: she said, not only did you know the school that
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  Speaker 3: are that Lewis that all of our kids went to
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  Speaker 3: is Outfield. They taught you how to get in front
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  Speaker 3: of the class and speak. You just had to learn
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: how to get past that shyness, right. But she said,
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  Speaker 3: you know, Mom, I really learned it by watching you.
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: She said, I would see you go into a room
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  Speaker 3: and and I was surprised that she remembered this. But
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  Speaker 3: a lot of times I would go I would see somebody,
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  Speaker 3: maybe a mom in the classroom that didn't have anyone
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  Speaker 3: around them, and I would find myself making my way
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  Speaker 3: over there, and you know, introduce it myself, you know,
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  Speaker 3: just start the small talk and which one is your
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: kid and you know, something like that. But if you
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: think about it, this is you could actually find a
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  Speaker 3: biblical devotional in this, because Jesus was the ultimate at
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  Speaker 3: starting a conversation. He would notice, you know, And if
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  Speaker 3: we could teach our children to stay off the phone
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  Speaker 3: when you get into a situation, notice other people, smile,
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  Speaker 3: ask questions, and then like you said, listen, you know,
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  Speaker 3: and I will tell you who.
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  Speaker 2: I think is brilliant at this. Princess Kate. If you
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  Speaker 2: ever watch.
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  Speaker 1: Her, Princess Kate, yes, Catherine.
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  Speaker 3: Princess Catherine and Prince William, but her especially I watch
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  Speaker 3: She's got her children with her all the time, whether
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  Speaker 3: it's at a tennis match Wimbledon, or if she's at
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  Speaker 3: a polo game, or wherever she is, she's constantly talking
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  Speaker 3: to the person who is in front of her, whether
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  Speaker 3: it's in the receiving line or anything.
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  Speaker 2: Her children are watching her at all times. She's making
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  Speaker 2: small she's.
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  Speaker 3: Making conversation and you can I don't know what she's saying,
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  Speaker 3: but it's something in yearing enough to make them smile
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  Speaker 3: as they move along. But she has this way about
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  Speaker 3: her that you just watch you think she knows how
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  Speaker 3: to make every single person feel like she's truly invested,
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  Speaker 3: truly interesting. And I'll give Bill Clinton the same kudos.
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  Speaker 3: I can't stand her, but you know I don't.
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  Speaker 2: I can't say I can't see him.
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  Speaker 3: I don't like a lot of things he stands for,
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  Speaker 3: but I will say the charm of him was the
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  Speaker 3: small being able to make the person in front of
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  Speaker 3: looking that person in front of the eyes, in their eyes,
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  Speaker 3: and then.
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  Speaker 1: Making them think that they're the only person yeah.
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  Speaker 2: Engaged in them.
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  Speaker 3: And I find myself doing that because I was raised
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  Speaker 3: by a father who.
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  Speaker 2: Could just run a room.
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  Speaker 3: I mean, he was the best at making conversation and
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  Speaker 3: the one thing I loved and then I noticed, and
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  Speaker 3: I hope I passed this down to my children. I
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  Speaker 3: hope they watched me do the same thing. Is he
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  Speaker 3: would no matter who came around, if somebody was telling
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  Speaker 3: him a story, he was invested.
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  Speaker 2: And if I came up and like, dad, just hold
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: on just a second.
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  Speaker 1: I'm in on this.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, I almost don't like the title small talk, because
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  Speaker 1: while it can feel superficial at the moment, really.
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  Speaker 2: It's sets the foundation.
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  Speaker 1: It sets the foundation, and if you're good at it,
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  Speaker 1: it's not small, right, it's it usually ends up being
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  Speaker 1: about really big things.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, you got to find out so much about.
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  Speaker 1: People, and you got to get past your Hey, nice
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  Speaker 1: weather we're having that's right, start with the person. How
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  Speaker 1: are you doing today? Yes, and yeah, I think that
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  Speaker 1: I think it's really important.
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  Speaker 3: I do too, and I think it's I think it's
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  Speaker 3: something that the parents need to start really instilling into
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  Speaker 3: their children, especially these days. I think us the eighties kids,
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  Speaker 3: I think we have it down.
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  Speaker 1: If you like descar American Mama's question, go to our
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: website American Doug Rader dot com slash Mama's and ask
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: us a small talk question.