Latest / Living with Parkinson’s | Bryce Perry / Parkinson’s & Positivity: Is It Okay to Laugh?

Transcript

Parkinson’s & Positivity: Is It Okay to Laugh? · Living with Parkinson’s | Bryce Perry

• 0:01
  They told him he had five good years left.
• 0:04
  That was 15 years ago. He's still standing, still
• 0:08
  speaking, still living. This is living with Parkinson's,
• 0:12
  The good, the bad, and the reality.
• 0:15
  A podcast about what happens when life throws you something
• 0:18
  incurable and you fight back anyway.
• 0:21
  Hosted by Bryce Perry, diagnosed at 4015.
• 0:25
  Years into the battle, This is the truth behind the tremor.
• 0:29
  Let's begin. Is it OK to laugh when you're
• 0:32
  living with Parkinson's? You know, some people think that
• 0:35
  laughing makes it things seem like you're not taking things
• 0:38
  seriously, but I believe it's the exact opposite.
• 0:40
  So sometimes laughing is the only thing that gets me through.
• 0:44
  Today, we're diving deep into Humor Matters, how laughter
• 0:47
  saved my sanity more times than I can count, and why it's not
• 0:51
  enough to just laugh, it's essential.
• 0:53
  So stick around, there's one, you know, making myself laugh
• 0:57
  already. Stick around.
• 0:58
  This one's for every stubborn, hopeful fighter who still knows
• 1:01
  how to smile. Hey everyone, welcome back to
• 1:13
  Living with Parkinson's, the good, the bad, and the reality.
• 1:16
  And if you're new here, my name is Bryce and this podcast is all
• 1:19
  about real talk, real hope, and real life with Parkinson's.
• 1:22
  We cover the messy moments, the funny fails, the small victories
• 1:25
  and everything in between. And if you join, if you enjoy
• 1:29
  these types of honest conversations, feel free to hit
• 1:31
  the subscribe button. The pressure, just an
• 1:33
  invitation. If you want to dive deeper into
• 1:36
  connection, come check out the Inner circle.
• 1:38
  It's a private membership where we go meet live on Zoom once a
• 1:41
  month. We laugh, require, we laugh, we
• 1:43
  cry, we share what's really going on.
• 1:45
  You'll find the link in the description if you're watching
• 1:47
  on YouTube and there's a join button actually right below this
• 1:50
  video. You can hit join and make sure
• 1:51
  you click on the inner circle. The next next Zoom meeting where
• 1:56
  we're just going to hang out together is the first week of
• 2:00
  May. So you know, click on now.
• 2:02
  No pressure again, but would love to see you there.
• 2:05
  But today I want to talk about laughter.
• 2:09
  Laughter is survival. So Parkinson's is heavy, right?
• 2:12
  Like the day you hear the words, you have Parkinson's.
• 2:14
  It feels like the floor disappears beneath you.
• 2:18
  There's grief, there's fear, there's loss.
• 2:20
  But somewhere along the way, I realized something really
• 2:23
  crucial. If it, if I didn't find a way to
• 2:26
  laugh even a little, this disease was going to break me
• 2:29
  from the inside out. It really was.
• 2:32
  And I'm sure you felt that way or, or feeling that way, but
• 2:36
  laughing, I want to be really clear about something.
• 2:38
  Laughing isn't ignoring reality, it's surviving.
• 2:43
  OK, I'll tell you a story apparently.
• 2:45
  And, and I got a lot of comments from that last video and about
• 2:49
  my story. So I guess I'm a bit of a
• 2:51
  storyteller. As a matter of fact, my friends,
• 2:53
  when I was growing up, they used to say that Bryce lived in a
• 2:56
  cartoon world. And what does that mean?
• 2:59
  I never quite understood it, but it's sort of like they said, I'm
• 3:02
  the type of person that if anything's going to happen to
• 3:04
  somebody, it's going to happen to Bryce.
• 3:06
  And #2 it's like they also said how some people have said it's
• 3:11
  sort of like the Bugs Bunny and the, and the Roadrunner.
• 3:14
  They said, like you, I'd be like running or doing getting into
• 3:17
  some mischief. And I had like one of those
• 3:19
  little circle things I could just throw in front of me and it
• 3:21
  turned into a hole and I could just disappear And somehow I was
• 3:25
  OK. I don't know.
• 3:26
  But anyway, let me tell you this story and I'll never forget.
• 3:29
  This is crazy. So I was walking to the airport
• 3:31
  and this was not long ago. And I was trying to act normal.
• 3:35
  And it was one of those things. I was a long day.
• 3:37
  I was stressed out, I was tired. I was probably a little bit off,
• 3:40
  not sure, kind of probably messed up my pill schedule.
• 3:42
  I'm not, you know, can't quite remember exactly where I was at,
• 3:44
  but OK. So I'm walking in there, but
• 3:47
  suddenly, like suddenly rid of bam, my right arm.
• 3:49
  It swings out just like, you know how, you know, Parkinson's,
• 3:52
  right? Swings out, smacks this like my
• 3:54
  carry on bag, right? Like had my carry on mics in
• 3:57
  here, smacks the bag so hard that it knocked over this whole
• 4:00
  display of like that overpriced water bottles and everybody
• 4:04
  stops and stairs. It was kind of like right on the
• 4:06
  edge of the terminal. You know, you're walking through
• 4:08
  the hallway and this, this display of water, right?
• 4:13
  And it looked, I knew it. I mean, you know what?
• 4:15
  I was one of those ones I looked at.
• 4:16
  I'm like, why would someone do that?
• 4:18
  Someone's going to knock that over.
• 4:21
  So I set my stuff down anyway, all over the place, everybody
• 4:24
  staring at me, staring at me. It was just crazy.
• 4:27
  And the old me, I would have died inside.
• 4:29
  Like I literally would have been like, so embarrassed, beet red.
• 4:32
  Everything's going crazy. Excuse me one second.
• 4:33
  I find these new, I guess what I got hearing aids in.
• 4:36
  And now it's like, give me some feedback, but that's OK.
• 4:39
  But the new me, I kind of like shrugged and I just said like
• 4:42
  really loudly. Apparently I've activated the
• 4:44
  self destruct sequence and people around me started
• 4:47
  laughing and I laughed and it was just funny.
• 4:49
  And just like that, I broke the tension.
• 4:51
  Didn't understand anything about Parkinson's.
• 4:52
  Nothing. I just kind of broke the
• 4:53
  tension. And that's that's why that is
• 4:56
  for me why humor connects us. It connects people.
• 5:00
  Humor does something really powerful.
• 5:01
  It reminds people that you're still you.
• 5:04
  You're not just that person with Parkinson's.
• 5:06
  You're a human being who can find absurdity in the absurd
• 5:09
  circumstances. And when you lead with humor,
• 5:11
  you can invite connection. You take the power back from
• 5:14
  awkwardness. All right, here's another
• 5:16
  classic for me. So I might have told this
• 5:19
  before, but I'll turn it again because it's one of those ones
• 5:21
  that sticks with me. But I'm at this formal
• 5:22
  fundraising dinner and I'm cutting into my roast beef and
• 5:25
  suddenly, you know, like suddenly my hand slips, you
• 5:29
  know, go figure, right? Gravy everywhere, gravy
• 5:32
  everywhere, including the person besides me.
• 5:34
  Dress shirt. I want to sink to the floor.
• 5:36
  I want to get into the table. I'm so embarrassed.
• 5:39
  Instead, I lean over and I just said, well, clearly the cow, the
• 5:42
  cow had one final move plan and the table just erupted Laughter.
• 5:46
  And there's no shame. There's no pity.
• 5:48
  It's just a human moment. It's a human moment.
• 5:52
  And I was having this discussion with my wife the other day and
• 5:54
  she, she was like, oh, you people with Parkinson's, Like
• 5:56
  she was, we were joking around, but she's like, you people with
• 5:58
  Parkinson's like you think it's always just, she says how many
• 6:02
  times I've knocked over the water and I'm like, really?
• 6:06
  Oh, you know, how many times have you knocked it over an
• 6:08
  entire display of water everywhere.
• 6:14
  And Bryce, he's done it a few times.
• 6:16
  I've knocked, I've bumped into with, with my grocery carts a
• 6:19
  few times. I, I mean, I've done it a few
• 6:20
  times, but like she said, like I've spilt gravy on people, I've
• 6:24
  spilt lying on people. Like so she said, don't be so
• 6:26
  hard on yourself. It happens to everybody.
• 6:28
  And I'm like, OK, yeah, I get that.
• 6:29
  I mean more to ask though. Stay with us.
• 6:34
  We'll be right back. But anyway, I want to say this
• 7:20
  as clearly as I can that you know, you have permission to
• 7:24
  laugh, right? You're allowed to find joy,
• 7:26
  you're allowed to be happy. You're allowed to have moments
• 7:29
  that are purely silly, even if in even if in the middle of
• 7:32
  these serious struggles, right? Laughing doesn't mean you're not
• 7:35
  not struggling. And I want to be really clear,
• 7:36
  laughing doesn't mean you're not struggling.
• 7:39
  It means you're human, right? It means you're human.
• 7:42
  And it laughing and putting a smile on your face or somebody
• 7:45
  else's goes a long way. It really, really does.
• 7:49
  It really does. And you know, if you're watching
• 7:52
  this, even this far, if you made it through those two stories and
• 7:55
  maybe you put a little bit of a smile on your face, then I'm
• 7:58
  glad because that's what I want to do today.
• 8:00
  I want to give you a smile. Life's hard, right?
• 8:03
  Life's hard without Parkinson's. Add that in and it's hard.
• 8:08
  And you know what? Maybe you don't have?
• 8:10
  Maybe somebody might say easy for you.
• 8:13
  I don't have a sense of humor. I'm not funny, or I'm not that
• 8:15
  quick, or I can't think of something on the fly.
• 8:18
  Well, then borrow mine, you know, think of some of the
• 8:21
  things I say and just repeat it. And I had an old friend of mine
• 8:24
  used to say that, you know, the first time you, you quote
• 8:28
  somebody or, you know, quote somebody, you can say, you know
• 8:30
  who said it? You can say, hey, Bryce Perry
• 8:32
  from the, you know, Bryce from this, this podcast, parks and
• 8:35
  podcast said this, right. The second time you use it, you
• 8:39
  just say, I heard this somewhere.
• 8:41
  And the third time it's all yours.
• 8:42
  So there you go. Anyway, I'm going to tell you
• 8:46
  this other thing. This one time I froze at the
• 8:48
  bottom of an escalator. OK, like the full body freeze,
• 8:51
  like full body couldn't stop, couldn't step forward.
• 8:54
  People are piling up behind me getting irritated like I was
• 8:56
  just had come off the of the escalator.
• 8:59
  So I was a few steps in front. So people are coming down and
• 9:01
  I'm like this barrier right in front of the escalator and
• 9:03
  they're having to go around me and I could feel people like
• 9:06
  breathing on me. I can feel like the here the
• 9:08
  size, it was just crazy. They're piling up, they're
• 9:11
  getting irritated. Complete nightmare.
• 9:14
  So finally the security guard comes over and, and he asked if
• 9:17
  I was OK and I just looked at him dead serious.
• 9:19
  And I just said, yeah, I'm just buffering.
• 9:22
  Apparently you have bad Wi-Fi in here, so just give me a second.
• 9:25
  And and he just looked at me like really puzzled.
• 9:27
  And then also he just broke up laughing and I laughed as well.
• 9:31
  And it was, it was quite funny. But you know, somehow that made
• 9:34
  it easier to move on. And you know, there's a real
• 9:37
  science actually behind this too.
• 9:39
  Laughing releases endorphins, right?
• 9:41
  And it, it lowers your cortisol, which is your stress hormone,
• 9:46
  and it helps your brain handle pain better.
• 9:48
  Laughter literally makes living with Parkinson's more bearable,
• 9:51
  not just emotionally and but physically.
• 9:53
  So rent of comedy movie, watch a movie tonight, laugh, enjoy,
• 9:57
  enjoy. If you laugh, it's going to
• 9:59
  release things that honest to God helps.
• 10:01
  It really, really does. I'm going to tell you this one
• 10:04
  time, you know, we talked about the inner circle and if, if, if
• 10:08
  you are part of the inner circle, you know, hi, if you're,
• 10:12
  if you're not, there's a, there's a link in the
• 10:14
  description below and that's a monthly Zoom call just with me,
• 10:17
  me and like my, my, my, my inner circle, people that were, were
• 10:22
  doing life, we're doing it like together.
• 10:24
  It's kind of like a, it's like my, it's like my private support
• 10:27
  group with my, my peeps, right? And there we have some space
• 10:30
  available. So if you want, there's a join
• 10:33
  button below this video. You can join join us, right?
• 10:35
  There's one coming up right away within the next two weeks and
• 10:38
  you can come and enjoy it. It's a great time and I can help
• 10:41
  help you as well and talk. We can chat.
• 10:42
  We just we're going to do it together.
• 10:44
  We're going to live life 2 together.
• 10:46
  But this one night there was this zoom call right and someone
• 10:51
  made a joke about freezing like mid hug and then it turned into
• 10:54
  this like ridiculous improv bit. I was laughing so hard that I
• 10:58
  had to turn my camera off because for a second because I
• 11:04
  it's like crying. Like I was laughing so hard that
• 11:08
  it just turned into crying. And it was one of the best
• 11:11
  nights that I've ever had since my diagnosis.
• 11:14
  Not because the Parkinson's went away, but because for that
• 11:19
  moment it was, it wasn't the center of the universe.
• 11:22
  I realized in that moment that this had nothing to do with
• 11:26
  Parkinson's. Like it was like literally
• 11:28
  sitting there with my friends on the Zoom call and sitting there
• 11:31
  and just laughing and not even thinking about it.
• 11:37
  And it was just this incredible moment.
• 11:39
  It was so deep. It was, it was amazing.
• 11:41
  So very healing, if that makes sense.
• 11:45
  Very vaguely. And, and, and listen, some days,
• 11:49
  some days you don't feel like laughing and that's OK too.
• 11:51
  Humor isn't a replacement for grief at all.
• 11:54
  It's a companion. It's a tool in the Survival kit,
• 11:57
  not a mask you have to wear all the time.
• 12:00
  There are days when I cry, there's days when I rage.
• 12:02
  There's days I'm frustrated and there's days I laugh and there's
• 12:05
  days when I I trip on my own foot and I laugh because what
• 12:09
  the heck else are you going to do?
• 12:12
  Both things can be true, can't they?
• 12:15
  One of the biggest fears of Parkinson's is losing yourself,
• 12:18
  losing the you that you recognize.
• 12:21
  But every time, I every time you laugh, every time you crack a
• 12:23
  joke or smile through the mess, you're proving that you're still
• 12:27
  in, You're still in there. Fire.
• 12:29
  That wit, that spark, it's not gone.
• 12:31
  It might flicker, it might hide sometimes, but it's still yours.
• 12:36
  It's still yours. And that's what I'm going to
• 12:39
  say. Smile, laugh.
• 12:41
  You have permission. And if this episode gave you
• 12:43
  permission to laugh again, hit the like button and leave a
• 12:46
  comment below. How about you share a moment
• 12:48
  with me, Share a moment in the comments when Parkinson's made
• 12:50
  you laugh, even if it wasn't funny at first.
• 12:53
  I know I read and I reply to every single comment personally
• 12:57
  and I'll be honest, we get a lot of comments.
• 12:59
  So I might be a little behind, but trust me, I will get to it.
• 13:03
  I promise you I will everyone, every single one.
• 13:06
  And like I said earlier, you know what if you want more, even
• 13:08
  more community, then check out the inner circle.
• 13:11
  Once a month we hop on a zoom call, no filters, no pretending.
• 13:13
  It's one of the most encouraging things that I do.
• 13:15
  I love it's one of my favorite days of the entire month and the
• 13:18
  next calls coming soon. So there's a link in the
• 13:20
  description below or you can click on join if you're watching
• 13:23
  on YouTube. There's no pressure, honestly,
• 13:25
  no pressure, no expectations, just presents.
• 13:28
  So thank you. Thank you for being here today.
• 13:31
  Thank you for laughing with me. And remember, you're still here
• 13:35
  and that is worth celebrating and I'll see you in the next
• 13:40
  one. Parkinson's may be part of your
• 13:48
  life, but it doesn't get to define it.
• 13:51
  Thanks for listening to Living with Parkinson's, the good, the
• 13:54
  Bad, and the Reality. If this episode moved you,
• 13:58
  helped you, or reminded you you're not alone, share it with
• 14:01
  someone who needs to hear it. Want to go deeper?
• 14:04
  The Inner Circle is waiting. Monthly Zoom calls, 24/7
• 14:08
  community, and a Direct Line to Bryce.
• 14:11
  You'll find the link in the show notes.
• 14:13
  Until next time, keep showing up and keep doing life today.