Latest / Soul Salon with Ayandastood / 65: what you need to know as a visionary

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65: what you need to know as a visionary · Soul Salon with Ayandastood

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You are a visionary, which means you see possibilities of how we could be,
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of how we could feel, how we could relate, how we could exist, and how we could create.
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You see possibilities that have not yet come into being.
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You see beyond what is, into what could be, beyond the current paradigm,
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into a new paradigm of healing, of loving, of creating, of feeling.
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And it is so clear to you that everything about our world could be so different.
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Now, the gift of the visionary is not merely the vision, but it is the ability to hold a vision
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over a long period of time, not weeks, not months, but years, and to take inspired action
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in alignment with that vision. But in addition to the patience and perseverance required
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to do such a thing, to hold on to a vision, a possibility for many, many years, the visionary
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must also be able to hold the polarity of the pursuit of their vision. What does that mean?
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First of all, let's dive a little bit deeper on the patience before we get into the polarity.
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Patience, my love, is an abundant energy in the universe. Patience is always available
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for you to tap into. It is not glamorous, it is not sexy, and it is not something that can be
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sold to us. And therefore, it's an unpopular idea, the idea that things take time.
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But patience has supported the farmer waiting for the rain, the dreamer waiting for the dream,
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and it is here to support you as you pursue your highest visions and possibilities.
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And remember, what I call the principle of collective dreaming, that your dreams are not merely
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your own, but are the collective dreaming through you, that you only see the you side of the dream,
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but there is an us side of the dream that is equally important. On the other side of the teacher's
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dream to teach, is the student's dream to be taught by such a teacher who loves their craft
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and their lessons so much. On the other side of the singer who dreams of cultivating and sharing
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her voice, are the listeners who dream of being moved by the frequency of that singer, by the
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lyrics of that singer, by their melodies, by their energy. So we often only see the egoic, the self
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part of the dream, and we don't tap into how this is a collective dream dreaming through us,
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that we are here to make an offering. There's this beautiful quote by Rumi, whatever the ways of the
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world, what fruits do you bring? Whatever the ways of the world, the crises, the suffering,
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the joy, and the conflict, whatever is happening in the world, what fruits do you bring, bringing
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us back into the notion that we are each here to make an offering. If there is a possibility,
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which there is, in the scope of infinite possibilities, of us reaching collective utopia,
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not just collective healing, which is beautiful and profound, but the healing that then leads to
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the utopic vision, the feeling of love, belonging, connection, freedom, liberation,
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all of these possibilities for all of us. If such a utopia exists, we will have had to have created
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it. And if we created that collective utopia, we must have been the kinds of people who believed
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we had the capacity to create a collective utopia. There must have been within us that vision of
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the possibility and that ability to sit with that vision and work towards it over many, many years.
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And so we each within our souls and our beings hold one of the keys or one of the portals into
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such a vision that our souls are here to offer something, to make that offering, to bring a certain
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fruit, to the collective consciousness, to collective healing, and to collective utopia.
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But in order to do that, my loves, we need to be the kinds of people who can sit with a vision
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and work towards it with devotion and love over very long periods of time. And so because you are
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a visionary, you need to cultivate not only the sense of yourself as that visionary, the power of
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your visions, the power of what you see, and you could feel it, you could hear it, you could
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intuit it, there are many different clays, clavoyants, clasentians, clays audience, all of the
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things. But if we just use the word vision to embody this idea of a possibility that's not yet
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here, but that we can touch and feel and see and taste, without patience, we will not be able
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to bring into being that prophetic vision. And it's not just that we need to wait passively and be
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patient, but along the way, we need to be able to hold the polarity of what pursuing that dream
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will entail. Now what is polarity? Polarity is the idea of having two opposite poles, North and
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South, darkness and light, young and old, birth and death, cold and hot, it goes on and on and on.
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And there is the universal law of polarity, which is one of the 12 universal laws, the one that you
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are probably most familiar with of the universal laws is the law of attraction, which has been
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popularized by books like The Secret, by Manifestation Teachers, the idea that if we align our thoughts,
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feelings, actions to the frequency of our desires, to positivity, to love, to abundance, to opportunity,
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we then attract and magnetize those experiences and opportunities towards us.
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But there are 11 other universal laws, including, for example, the law of divine oneness,
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the idea that everything is connected, separation is always an illusion.
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And the law that you need to be intimately familiar with as a visionary, I believe all of them,
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but one of them is the law of polarity. Polarity is the idea that everything has two poles,
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that within any phenomenon, we will experience opposites. And so embedded in the experience of
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something, will also be what we experience as its opposite. For example, in the experience of a
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day, a 24 hour period, we will experience both darkness and light, both night and day.
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But it's not opposite in the sense of separate. We've imposed our understanding and our language
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to make sense of a deeper reality. We use language as a technology to explain and to penetrate
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a deeper reality beyond language. But sometimes that act, that technology, not only does not fully
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tap into or penetrate the deeper reality, but actually obfuscate or confuses it. And so the word
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opposite to our human mind sounds like separate, sounds like against, it sounds like conflict,
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but that's not the case. It's a mutually enabling opposite day, enables night, as night,
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enables day. Okay? Intimacy in a relationship enables conflict because you're so close to someone
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that you are in the position to be in conflict with them, which enables for the intimacy.
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If you have a true loving conflict, what you're going to do is learn more about yourself and
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that person and you're going to come to a more deeper understanding thus increasing your intimacy.
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You cannot be in deep intimacy with another human being without conflict. They may seem
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opposite, but they are mutually enabling. Similarly, birth is a process that leads to death.
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But we know that at the end of many deaths that we experience, whether it's grief or loss or heart
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break, we then typically experience another birth. Birth as a concept, we're not only talking about
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human life being born, but a relationship being born, a project being born, any sort of experience
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being born is going to enable a lead to death, but that death is then going to enable a birth into
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a different kind of being. So the caterpillar, in a sense, dies to become the butterfly or the
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tadpole dies to become the frog. In a sense, that form of life that was in the womb once that we
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were, died to become part of the world with everyone else. The outer world beyond the womb,
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again another polarity, inner and outer. So what this means is that sometimes, if we have everything
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having two poles, which are opposite, but mutually enabling opposites, not opposite as in separate,
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not opposite as in this or that, but actually both. It's all if you imagine one continuation,
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one spectrum of experience, different degrees of experience. Okay, so light and darkness,
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different degrees of something rather than two completely separate things that are completely
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opposed to each other. They are different degrees of frequency of light. And what we can do
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is we can use geometry, the study of shapes to understand what we mean. We can view a spectrum
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as a line from the left to the right. We could say this is day and then day eventually becomes
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night. But this linear understanding is an illusion because we know at the end of the night,
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it becomes day again. So we're going to take this line and turn it into the circumference of a
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circle. So the edge of a circle. And now we get a clearer picture because day
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inflates into night, which then becomes day again. So now we get this whole
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integral concept or an integrity and wholeness of day and night together, of intimacy and conflict,
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birth and death. Okay, flowing from one to the other in one collective experience.
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So in order for you to hold your vision and act in alignment with it, you need to be the
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visionary who holds the polarity of your vision that you dreamed a very desirable dream of what
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it's going to feel like to speak on a stage or have a podcast or to release an album to write a
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book that shifts and raises collective consciousness to be a comedian, whatever it may be, whatever
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you dream of. The issue becomes when you over identify with only one side of the dream, only one
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half of the circle of the full experience of the dream and what is that circle? What is the day
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the night, the old, the young? It is the dream and the resistance. There cannot be a dream without
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resistance, either internal or external or both. Why? Because then it wouldn't be a dream.
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I don't dream of pointing my finger at you because there's no resistance towards it. I don't
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have to dream it. Why would I dream it if I could just do it? Okay. So a dream often involves
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some level of resistance and the resistance could be systemic factors, social barriers, health
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barriers. There's many different forms of resistance and then there's also internal resistance,
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self-doubt, feelings of being an imposter, perfectionism, the feeling that it has to be a certain
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way, attachment to a specific path or outcome. So we have all these different barriers and without
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that resistance, I'm not saying that that makes the resistance justifiable. I'm not saying that's
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a good thing. I'm saying conceptually embedded in the concept of a dream or desire is resistance.
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As in, there cannot be this thing we call a dream reality without there being resistance towards
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that reality or it would simply just be our reality. Okay. If there was no resistance between me and
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writing a book, I wouldn't even have to name it a dream. It could just be an action. Okay. So
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dreams typically involve some level of resistance. We have to do actions that we may feel uncomfortable
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about or we are literally socially, socioeconomically, racially, precluded from the dream by the society
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we live in. So that is resistance. But similarly, there would be no dream without resistance and there
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would be no resistance without the dream. So for example, I felt nervous before recording this
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episode. If it wasn't so important to me because it's my dream, I probably wouldn't feel such a
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strong emotion as discomfort or nerves or unease. So it's because it's my dream that I also then
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feel this attendant resistance towards it. And sometimes what we do is when it comes to a relationship
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or a career or creative project, we overly identify with only the positive quote unquote aspects
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of that experience. And by doing so, if we think of the circle again, we only identify with half
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of the circle. What does that mean? We're never going to experience the fullness of the circle,
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which means we may not ever experience the circle at all. So if you are always fixated on the illusion
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of what a relationship can be romantically, you probably won't ever become in the position to live
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the reality of a relationship because as soon as it starts to get real, as soon as it starts to
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move from it's we could use the metaphor light aspect to the shadow aspect, you may think,
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oh, I reject the shadow aspect. So I don't want this relationship. But someone who genuinely
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wants love and wants a romantic union, they are willing to endure or experience the full experience
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of the relationship. And I'm talking about a healthy relationship. I'm talking about a loving
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relationship. It's going to involve conflict, difficult conversations you would rather not have
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responsibilities. You'd maybe rather not have if it was really up to you because we can't pick
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and choose and design the perfect person or relationship. And neither are we that. Right,
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sometimes again, this is why shadow work exists because doing shadow work helps us reclaim and
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be integrity with our whole selves and not reject deny or repress aspects of our self that we've
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been told are too shameful or that we held shame around and so on and so forth or that we've
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repressed. So as a visionary, what you need to understand is on the path towards actualizing your
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dream and our dream, therefore, you're going to be asked to hold both the excitement, the magic,
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the connection, the flow and the discomfort, the unease, the fear, the resistance. You're going
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to be asked to hold all of it. And the people who will then ultimately be able to work on their
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dreams over a long period of time, versus the people who are in the position to do that because
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of course that is a huge privilege in and of itself, but do not work on their dreams, do not
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write the novel of their dreams, do not sing the voice of their dreams and so on even though they
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could. One of the key differences is that people who are working on their dreams have surrendered to
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the fullness of the experience of doing that. They don't only associate the dream with the highs,
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they are willing to hold both the highs and the lows. So when they face forms of pain and suffering
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and this is unavoidable in the pursuit of your dreams, of course you will suffer, of course you will
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in the pursuit of your dream relationship, in the pursuit of your dream career, in the pursuit of
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your dream creative project, they will be suffering. That is just inevitable. But if we cannot hold
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that suffering, the confusion, the loss, the embarrassment, like if you, I speak a lot about the
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fear of being seen, if you cannot hold embarrassment, then the chances of doing what you want to do
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publicly diminish, it's not to say they're impossible, but if you're not willing to literally hold
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the frequency of, oh, this is embarrassing, you'll never put yourself out there, you'll never post
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anything because you're too afraid of being embarrassed. And I totally understand why I'm not
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minimizing that at all. We live in such a shameful culture, there's conditioning, there's bullying,
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there's oppression, there's all these toxic beauty standards, there's all these factors that go
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into that. But if we're more committed to the dream than to the resistance towards the dream,
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if we're more committed to the possibility of what could unfold, rather than some of the obstacles
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of the unfolding, we will pursue that embarrassment. We will pursue failure. Like if you're so committed
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to a vision of what you have named success, then failure will become tolerable to you, you will
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tolerate it because the vision you hold is bigger than any single individual failure. But if you
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refuse to fail, you've also refused to succeed. If you refuse to have a video that bombs out,
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you've refused to have a video channel because videos will bomb out if you refuse to ever get
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hated on on the internet, you've refused to be on the internet because you will be hated on.
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So it's accepting radically the fullness of the experience. Now I'm not saying I want to just
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be careful with my words with the idea of hate comments, for example, there are ways that your
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worst case scenario is deeply lying to you and you may be someone who never experiences that.
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However, at the same time, meanwhile, both at once, that is an unlikely situation. You know that
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you will just never face criticism. That's just not likely, okay? It's not likely. And someone
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who loves you is not going to allow you to live in illusion. But, but, but, but, but, but. First of all,
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the worst case scenario is not as bad as we are imagining, probably. And second of all, we
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underestimate our ability to respond and to cope with what is coming our way. And also, we
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underestimate the universe's capacity to magnetize the law of attraction. The peers, the mentors,
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the friends who are actually going to be the exact support system that we need to walk that
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journey. So for me, with the fear of being seen, I have overcome a lot of the fear of being seen,
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but not all of it. I still fear it in many ways. In fact, my last video got a lot of views on
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YouTube. And I was like, oh my god, what am I doing? I literally had that moment of like, what on
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earth am I doing? And that is a part of the journey. Because what was the difference between me and
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someone who couldn't hold that frequency of polarity of doubt and certainty of confusion and clarity.
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It's all part of it. I was able to say, I felt that way on a Tuesday. And now it's Thursday.
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You know what I mean? Or now it's the next week. You hold it. You just say, like the ocean,
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I can go through the ebbs and flows of this experience, but I'm still the ocean. I'm not the wave.
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I'm not going to be like overcome by the single experience. And when I am, I can. You always
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welcome to leave a path or change your mind absolutely. But I think
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one of the illusions that we allow ourselves to live as we say, I'm not willing to cope with
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the exact experiences that it would be required to cope with if I actually want to devote myself
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to this path. And then we stay in the regret and the stuckness and the feeling of like wanting
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to do some things that were not. Instead of saying to ourselves with truthfulness, oh, it's so
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difficult to be truthful to yourself to others. You need to ask yourself in the quietness of your
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day, of your night, of your life. When it comes to a desire, a dream, a wouldn't it be nice,
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you need to ask yourself, do I want the illusion of this path? Or do I want the reality of it?
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If you can ask yourself that in the face of your dreams, in the face of your goals,
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do I want the illusion of what it's going to feel like to be a YouTuber? Do I want the illusion
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of what it's going to feel like to be a singer? Not imagining vocal exercises or times I don't
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want to practice or times I don't want to audition. Not imagining times I may be rejected,
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times I may be criticized, but only identifying with the romanticized version of being a singer,
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only identifying with the romanticized version of being a YouTuber or whatever it is,
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holding an event, creating a book club, whatever you want to do. Do I want the illusion or do I want
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the reality? Because when you accept that you want the reality, you want the reality of a loving
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relationship, you don't want the illusion of it. What is going to unlock for you, my love,
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is a willingness that is so powerful it can move mountains, a willingness to sit through discomfort,
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a willingness to believe that there's going to be relief and pleasure on the other side of that,
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a willingness to find the delight and find the pleasure where you can, a willingness to hold the
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ups and downs of the journey you're on, a willingness to also recognize when you are not in alignment
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and integrity and how you can shift things to be in alignment with that vision when you decide
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I want the reality of what it feels like to do with that person is doing, not the illusion and envy
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babes so much of your jealousy comparison envy is going to dwindle because you will realize I don't
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actually envy that person's process I only envy their results. So I don't want the fullness
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of their experience I don't want the polarity of their experience I just want the book launch I
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don't want to write the book I just want the beautiful podcast studio I don't want to get to
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episode 700 over eight years you know what I mean you want the fantasy of it and that's okay admit
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to yourself I just want the fantasy of that I don't want that I don't want that and the issue is
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in our world was sold so many fantasies of a perfect relationship of a perfect career of a perfect
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that it's sometimes difficult to even distinguish because we're like oh no that looks glamorous
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that looks fun that looks beautiful that looks amazing that must be amazing but that must be is
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almost always an illusion it doesn't must be anything nothing necessarily is anything else
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so what something appears to be is not necessarily what it is so I do this for myself so often
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and it's so powerful when I feel a pang of envy someone writes a book and I'm like oh my goodness
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wish I wrote that book and then I think about the fact that read the acknowledgement
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that person suffered to write that book I'm not glorifying suffering I'm talking about suffering in
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the spiritual sense of that it's unavoidable that we will suffer we are the beings that suffer okay
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so when I think about the process of showing up every day and writing and I think of my experience
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doing that I don't feel envy the envy goes away I don't want to do that sometimes I envy people
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in certain scholarly paths and then I think of researching things and I'm like that's just not my
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journey so it's a very beautiful way to pierce through your own illusions and understand when you
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are operating from a place of a person who wants the reality which means oh I met this person
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who I think could be an incredible partner yes there are superficial desires I had for a partner
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that they don't meet but because I actually want love and I want deep connection and I found
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it in this person I'm going to choose the messy reality over the illusion because you could talk
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the illusion at bed at night for decades that will be fine do you want that or there's a being
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in front of you I'm not saying and this is going to be misconstrued as me encouraging people to settle
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it's not settling you have an incredible partner it's not settling and also isn't everything kind
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of a settling thing we're always sort of settling in the sense that no experience is completely
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optimal you cannot optimize life only a consumerist understanding of the world would even think that
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that's the goal okay even if you love your craft there are going to be aspects of it that you
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don't love and in big magic by Elizabeth Gilbert she speaks about this she says the question is not
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what are you passionate about the question is what are you passionate about enough
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to withstand the aspects of it that you do not like that's not the exact quote but essentially
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that nothing is as glamorous as it seems and so what do you care about so much that you would choose
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or accept even the parts of it that are not ideal that are not glamorous that are not a fantasy
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okay so that is so deeply important is to hold the both and of the experience because you actually
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deserve the reality of the experience like if you dream of a relationship don't you deserve the
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reality of it do you want to only hold on to the illusion of it also I'm not saying that's the
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only things standing between people and relationships but I do know creatively our illusion of how
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it's supposed to feel to have a podcast or write or sing or rap host events whatever it may be
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interview people be a coach have your own business the illusion of what that's supposed to feel like
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it can often make us feel like we're doing it wrong when we hit up again some of the messiness
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of the reality now don't get me wrong it's a full experience so of course it includes magic
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and connection and joy and flow absolutely but will you be in flow every single day of your creative
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life imagine if no being blocked is just as much part of the creative life as being in flow you know
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what I mean that we're not gonna feel this constant constant flow we may feel certain forms of
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constant flow like I receive a constant flow of ideas that is my natural flow whereas other people
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may not experience a flow of ideas but I don't experience necessarily a flow of creation I sometimes
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hit blocks with that so the idea that I could experience a creative life with no blocks is just
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not the reality of a whole experience of a creative life okay okay so similarly fear it's
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inevitable and once you start to realize oh wow this is just the dream this is as much part of the
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dream as the excitement and the pride and the applause is the fear and the resistance and the
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discomfort and the sense of unease and the sense that you're not doing good enough and the
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last episode was better than this episode all of it is part of the dream it's just not the part
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that the energy of the dream is going to give to you in order for you to act in alignment with it
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what do I mean by that so dreams are really a paradox because a dream is really an illusion in
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the sense that it only feeds you one side of the coin of the full experience you're not gonna
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dream of being nervous and feeling like your speech isn't good enough and feeling like your heart
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is racing and your breathing exercises are not working you're just gonna dream of speaking on
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stage and having a pause afterwards you're not gonna dream of the weeks where you really don't
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want to create a video or where you feel behind or you're comparing yourself to other YouTubers or
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you're just gonna dream of having a successful YouTube channel and the opportunities that that will
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bring you so the dream will feed you half the story why because it knows that that half of the
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story is so important to you specifically so compelling to you specifically so activating to
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you specifically that that vision and that dream is going to motivate you is going to be with you
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through both the ups and the downs of your experience so the dream understands the dreamer
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and the dream understands if I give this person this vision this vision is so potent
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energetically to them it speaks so much to their soul that it will allow them invite them to be
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willing to withstand the obstacles on the path to this being their reality and by the time they
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live the reality and they now have the sight to see the fullness of it to have the award show but
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then to have the down after the award show they will be transformed into the being who can really
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hold the fullness of the dream that I wasn't actually willing to tell the beginner version of them
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because you're moving from the beginner who only sees it as a fancy and illusion into the
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version of you that's actually acting in alignment with it that version of you as wiser because
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they're not just imagining in imagination anything is possible in imagination you're disembodied
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there's no time barriers there's no technology that doesn't work there's nothing there's no block
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which is the beauty of imagination in imagination literally anything is possible
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when you translate that imagination into the 3d world into our physical reality there are going
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to be obstacles that you encounter but if you're able to hold that imaginary possibility
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and if it's speaking to you so directly that it's so compelling to you that you are willing still
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to put up with whatever comes along the way not whatever but to put up with some of the
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challenges that come along the way with support you're always worthy of support then that is the
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activating energy that that vision holds to support you through those lows and that's why it's not
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just about knowing your vision but staying connected to it knowing how you can tend to the
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possibility almost every day knowing that you are connecting to that vision the visionary mustn't
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just have the vision and then forget about it they must also have practices to reconnect with their
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vision especially if you want to sustain a project over yours it's going to take being connected
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to a vision that also evolves over yours so my loves if you can hold the polarity of your dream
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and you can recognize the wholeness and the integrity that you deserve to live the reality
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that you deserve to live of your dream you are going to be so potent and so powerful and you're
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also going to be patient because waiting is just part of the polarity of dreaming waiting for
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the dream not possibly but taking action and waiting putting out the videos no one's going to see
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them at first we don't know if that's going to be four months yours but trusting that the 3D
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world will eventually catch up holding the feeling of being embarrassed being cringe like it's not
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there's another law called the law of relativity so it's not just that you're a perfectionist or
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that you have self doubt you know I have those things it's that you don't have something bigger than
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that to counteract or to tip the balance towards action so you can be a perfectionist but if your
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desire to be prolific is bigger than your perfectionism you're just going to publish things because
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your desire to be prolific to be a creator who creates a lot which I'm not saying should be a
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desire but as many people's desires is bigger than your perfectionism it's not that your perfectionism
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went away it's that it has a force that is bigger and that is so critical so when you are stuck
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in perfectionism or self doubt or comparison you need to ask yourself what is bigger than this
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for me it's the vision I get all those things what ends up being bigger than my perfectionism
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is my vision and I understand from the vision the actions I need to take to align myself to that
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vision to make it inevitable and also that vision grows with you so the vision that gets you here
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may not be the vision that gets you there and that's okay it's beautiful the vision is unfolding
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with the visionary so my love I hope that you will be patient because we need you to be
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we need to be so in alignment with our deepest and highest visions for ourselves and for each other
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understanding the full 360 picture of the vision and the dream all the people it could touch
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and we'll never fully see that and we need to be willing to surrender to the fullness of the dream
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which involves the resistance just before this episode I felt nervous that it's part of the dream
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it's part of the dream living the dream I really think is aligning your actions to your soul's
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vision on any scale it doesn't have to be your full-time job or monetized it just has to be you
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honoring your soul's voice what is your soul saying if we could just do this and understanding yes
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you will feel a lot of weird feelings about that sometimes you'll feel confused sometimes you'll
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feel lost sometimes you'll feel like everything is going not according to plan such as the way of the
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world but if you can really create through that and not let it stop you from creating that is a beautiful
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form of devotion and I promise you there's a local the law of compensation you will be rewarded
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for aligning your actions to your highest visions over a long period of time you will be rewarded the
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harvest will come and to harvest the fruits that we are here to bring it will take and ask of us
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when we serve love it asks of us it doesn't just give to us but it does also give so I want you to
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know maybe you're in a season of magic and harvest and this feeling of fruitfulness and
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pleasure and that's beautiful we love that or maybe you're in a season of feeling stuck or blocked
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or confused or like you're not doing good enough or that you are too late please remember this
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will air this will flow this is not the full story but you deserve the full story what that requires
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is you saying we are in this we are having a rough day today we are in this experience and this
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is part of the fullness of working towards our deepest visions I love you so much my love I hope
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that this has served your deepest consciousness and I will see you on the next sole session you are
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divine you are precious you are magical you are a genius let's talk about that you are a creative
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innovator okay you are phenomenal and we really need you to believe that so that you can create an
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alignment with your highest love your highest possibility your highest divinity we need you to
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believe in yourself because when you believe in yourself you cultivate belief in us that we are one
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human body and all the cells are trying to heal and repair and we are rooting for the cell of your
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being we're rooting for you there are people who are rooting for you they want exactly what you are
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here to give they are so excited to receive exactly what you are so excited to offer I love you
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so much my darlings I will see you on the next sole session be well take care of yourself I love
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you so much I love you bye my darling my love my soul sibling thank you for stepping into the
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soul salon if you are still hearing or watching this we are soul siblings we are resonating on
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the same frequency and so something you may struggle with that I struggle with is the fear of being
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seen you know that visibility is involved in you living your creative purpose and being in your
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serving the collective through your gifts through your magic through your medicine in order to do
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that you know you need to be more seen than you are allowing yourself to be right now I have a gift
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just for you heart made for us on this frequency and it is a free ebook called the soulful visibility
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guide that is soulful visibility like we don't just want to be seen we want to be felt we want to
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be heard we want to move and be moved so I do have a free gift for you and all you need to do is
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go to my website i understood dot com and there you will be able to input your email address
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and receive this directly to your inbox this is such a juicy and delicious guide and I change
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the free offering every few months so you know get it while you can all the links are in the show
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so thank you so much I love you and I will see you on the next sole session okay I love you bye