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New Year - The Survivor’s Guide to 2026 · Mark and Pete

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  New Year, The Survivor's Guide to 2026.
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  This episode we've got a practical, spiritual, and mildly
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  irreverent field manual for getting through the year with
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  your soul intact and your dignity mostly undamaged.
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  Welcome to Mark and Pete, 2 blokes with half an opinion.
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  Now here's our first thought. Say goodbye to 2025 when the
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  calendar had conflicts. Look and learn how to survive in
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  2026 as the new year does eventually arrive.
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  Just stay at home and never intermix.
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  The nation may eventually revive and avoid all politics.
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  Months will then go into OverDrive, so remember, there's
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  no easy fix. Pretend it's 2027 to stay alive
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  as your mortal time ticks. Yes.
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  A simple guide to surviving the new year.
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  Well, it's a great time. A celebration, a new year.
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  Mr. Pete, I ask you what? Is your.
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  Techniques and really guide to our listeners on how to survive
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  for the new year. Well, specific things for
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  getting through this New Year period.
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  I think in this particularly helpful guide, I can just lead a
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  few people too. I mean, this is taken obviously
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  from the book of Proverbs, the Apocryphal Pete edition, which
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  has some really, and I mean these are essential and I can't
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  emphasis to this in most enough, absolutely essential, stupid new
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  new year suggestions. So yes, one thing I would say is
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  every new year, to get through this period, particularly on
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  late New Year's Eve going to New Year, you must this is this.
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  I think you'd agree with this Mark, You must sing old land
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  Zine with absolute confidence, but with no knowledge at all of
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  the actual words. I mean, another thing that
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  another thing that I think is essential, especially if you're
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  in a a reasonably large gathering, is to hold your drink
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  aloft and say with the utmost seriousness, this is my year.
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  Just as the, just as you're going into 2026, this is my
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  year. But make sure that you do with
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  absolute conviction and people will think you're a complete
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  idiot, which is a good way to start the year because you can
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  only go up from there. That's true.
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  But here's another tip that I would suggest.
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  If you're going to have a New Year celebration, I would
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  suggest having it in a neighbour's house, whether they
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  like it or not, because at least all the mess you see, you don't
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  have to clean that up afterwards and you never know what might
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  happen. But I would always suggest that
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  always sort of approach people as though, you know, everyone,
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  even though you probably have never met them before.
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  And, you know, with the bombings, of course, you know,
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  with Big Ben sort of chimes in the new year, always add 13.
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  Don't go just 12. Yeah, it's always a it's always
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  a good idea. Yes.
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  I mean, here's the other thing. And this is one thing I would
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  also suggest is, is that when you do get into the the bombing
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  afterwards is just remind them that the new year has not
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  actually started. The point being is, is of
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  course, as we all know, it's the fire horse, yes, the Chinese New
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  Year, well, that doesn't start until February.
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  So I think it's always important to just remind people of that
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  point, yes. Yes, the Chinese New Year, the
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  which is also their Spring Festival.
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  I think, I think I might it's it's the same sort of same basic
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  celebration, interesting time that because everyone else has
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  got it over with and they're still starting their new year,
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  but it gives time for another celebration.
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  And yeah, there tends to be more Dragons involved than in our
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  celebrations. But, you know, that's not
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  necessarily a bad thing. Yeah.
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  New year can seem like a difficult, stressful time
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  because it reminds you that another year has gone by and you
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  haven't achieved your life goals and you're not the sort of
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  person you hoped you would be when you were younger.
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  And you have to deal with that realization that there's less
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  and less time left for you to actually achieve something in
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  your life. So you, you, you can then then I
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  mean, obviously as a responsible podcast, we would then say make
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  sure that with them. And that realization hits you
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  once again, again, as it heads towards midnight.
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  Basically drink too much and say embarrassing things to someone
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  you don't really know very well, but definitely dislike.
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  That's that's the way to do it. This is all part of this
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  handbook that well. I go by helping.
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  People through this, Yeah. Yeah, Well, that's what I've
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  always done. And well, here's the other thing
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  is it's of course added to the praise.
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  Different kinds of things. Yes.
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  And of course, now here's the Americans, because since 19 O 7
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  and, and I don't mean 7 minutes past seven.
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  What I'm saying is in the year 19 O 7, New York City's Times
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  squares hosted it's iconic ball drop.
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  Yes, this is inspired by naval time balls when glittering
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  sphere descends on 141 feet at midnight.
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  Now I thought, well, why can't they do something slightly
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  different? Why does it have to be a ball
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  drop? Why?
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  Can it be something else? Well, what I think is that what
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  I've noticed is with looking at the political situation in
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  Britain, the Americans might do a ball drop, but we do a balls
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  up practically. Exactly.
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  So, you know, balls in things up All year is our contribution to
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  world culture, starting with the New Year celebration.
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  The Philippines have got a new sort of very As we go around the
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  world, the Philippines have a New Years celebration.
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  It's all about circles, meaning symbolising coins and
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  prosperities. Whereas yes, Britain is just
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  going around in circles, so absolutely nowhere.
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  Now here's the other thing, which is in Italy right now.
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  Have a guess what they do? Yes, Italians genuinely believe
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  that wearing red underwear on New Year's Eve brings good luck,
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  whereas we're Britain is always in the red.
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  So they, the Mexicans, as we all know, like to basically sweep
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  their homes at midnight to clear out bad energy.
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  Well, there you go. Well, Britain has got a very
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  high energy bill, so that might be something.
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  To. I like the next one which is
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  South Africa. They throw out old furniture and
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  it gets hurled out of windows and that is amazing.
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  I mean, this jaw-dropping tradition symbolises letting go
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  of the past. It is a very good idea.
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  I think that's an excellent one. I've done that with your
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  furniture of course, but. I was underwear.
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  Now, in Switzerland, people celebrate the new year by
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  purposefully dropping ice cream on the floor as a symbol of
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  abundance. This quirky tradition may sound
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  wasteful, but for the Swiss it's a gesture of hope, prosperity in
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  the coming year. Unless, of course, you are the
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  unsuspecting person who happens to step in and slip up on your
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  backside. Yes, these strange rich.
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  Yes, interesting. Now I just just to add to my
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  recent comments, I was just saying about how that
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  realisation that you've never amounted to anything hits you as
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  another year slides by. There's a Bible verse I've got
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  for you. This is from an equally
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  depression part of the Bible, Lamentations, Lamentations 322
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  to 23, in which it says this. This is interesting because it
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  is talking about a disastrous time when you failed or people
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  have failed you or the world hasn't gone how you wanted to.
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  And it's all very depressing. And it says because of the
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  Lord's great love we are not consumed for his compassions
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  never fail. They are new every morning Great
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  is your faithfulness so the you're being called it turns
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  into a a hymn to God that new every morning that is used in
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  several worship songs the this bringing people to worship of
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  God because they realise however much they may have messed up.
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  Now you personally, I recognise I was generalising there.
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  I was more talking about myself, but you may have had a brilliant
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  year and you may be surpassed all expectations of the sort of
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  person you wanted to be and be a great success.
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  But still, for you and for all the normal people around, God's
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  great love for us means that we are not consumed.
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  However depressing life might be, might be, or have a good
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  life might be. God still loves up and every
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  morning. God loves, still loves us well
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  and every morning, even on New Year's Day for all of 2026, God
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  will still be with us. So there's no need to panic.
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  Here's a thought just to sort of conclude this special episode.
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  It's all about New Year, but the same old feeling.
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  The mark of the New Year commences on January the 1st,
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  celebrated with fizzing fireworks that light up and
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  burst. The drinks all flow quickly to
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  quench an enthusiastic thirst in the atmosphere of hope where
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  folk are immersed. Then by January the second most
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  of the joy has dispersed because being back at work signals the
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  revelry has reversed. By now you've broken resolutions
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  as you cussed and cursed, and the start of the year already
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  feels like the worst. Happy New Year.