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He Gets A Clone-A-Willy - h8dit 31 · thxh8dit

0:00
It is called. God for no philosophical fucking
0:03
questions when I'm arms length away from Ryan.
0:09
This week it's called the it's. Not a new boat, Ryan.
0:12
She's still wrong. I had so many people in my Uber
0:15
say that I was right. That's so funny.
0:19
Every. Person who gets in there where
0:21
you replay that just that section and you're like, what do
0:24
you think about this? That's the guy that has no,
0:28
like, reason to back up. Oh yeah, everybody said I was
0:31
right because I'm Ryan. Do whatever you want.
0:47
I said something it's up to. You.
0:51
Yeah, it's recording. Welcome back guys.
0:54
It's. Fucking up to you guys.
0:56
Episode 31. Whatever you want to do with
0:58
your bullshit fuckers, fuck your life.
1:05
Bang Bong. I'm here with still angry Amber.
1:09
You all can literally eat a Dick.
1:11
Literally with like while you were in the bathroom when you
1:14
guys first got here speaking, which they're in my house right
1:17
now. Hey, when when you were in the
1:21
bathroom, I made, I made another Impractical Joker's reference
1:26
because I was looking through. Hey, Ryan Eden.
1:28
Suggested videos on my YouTube and there was a impractical
1:32
chance video and I go, oh, you want to, you want to listen to
1:35
this song, right? Because we were listening to
1:37
music and she's like fuck you and she's fucking slapped me.
1:43
I hate it here. I fucking hate it here.
1:48
The one I'm paying for at home, Ryan and your host Justin.
1:58
We've got a couple segments today.
2:01
We are live and IRL here in Florida, back in the original
2:09
spot right here in the living room where it all started.
2:11
We're not even in the studio because Ryan took out the
2:14
podcast desk. It's weird doing it and not
2:17
being drunk. It's weird not going in at the
2:20
podcast. In the in the house not being.
2:23
Drunk that I spend all that time on a whole day a.
2:28
Whole day. That when you took your
2:31
computers home with you, there was no feet, so it was angled,
2:36
so there was no point in me leaving it.
2:38
Up put anything else under it. It had to be the fucking laptop.
2:42
Was he? Supposed to use an Xbox.
2:45
Oh my God. That's the only thing perfectly
2:47
sized, yeah. Other than that, the panel roll
2:50
off. So dumb.
2:54
Four laptops of each edge. Four ancient or there was 1
2:59
laptop that we were using it as the leg stand for that podcast
3:04
desk that still had Windows XP. Probably no.
3:10
I remember a laptop with Windows XP.
3:12
That's so good. That's fantastic.
3:16
But we are IRL here in Florida, back in the old house.
3:20
We're back. Baby, I was summoned to work on
3:26
a boat that needed me to work on it because it it's.
3:31
The boat we sold. Yeah, we did sell it, but.
3:37
You talked about it in the last episode.
3:39
Definitely needed me to work on it because nobody else is going
3:44
to. We just can't find anybody to do
3:46
any work here anymore. There was one guy and then he
3:49
just quit responding. Probably because he realized
3:54
what the actual work was and he's like fuck that.
3:57
I think he quoted them $3800. Yeah, to change three batteries,
4:03
change the engine oil, transmission oil and fuel
4:07
filters and he'd quoted 3800 dollars.
4:12
Yeah, but these are not car batteries or AA batteries.
4:16
They. Are big bitches, but they're not
4:21
nearly as bad as I thought they were.
4:23
I thought they were 8D, which is £130 per battery.
4:28
They're 4D so it's only 90 lbs of battery.
4:32
Only 90 lbs of battery. What's funny is when I took the
4:35
old ones out, I was like, oh this isn't that bad.
4:37
They might, they might be 5060 lbs.
4:40
I, I honestly was like, wow, they're a lot lighter than I
4:42
thought they were. Putting the new ones back in the
4:45
exact same battery, just five years newer.
4:47
They weigh exactly 90 lbs. They're so fucking heavy.
4:52
And when you've already moved three of them up three flights
4:55
of stairs and then you're trying to put 3 new ones down three
4:59
flights of stairs after you just did the first 3, it's a fucking
5:04
burn, dude. I, I definitely wouldn't have
5:06
quoted $3800, but yeah, it's, it's a fucking slog.
5:12
Lot better than I thought it'd be, though.
5:14
I'm glad we got it done. We finally started the boat.
5:17
That's awesome. We haven't started it and done a
5:19
a run since September and now it's fucking first try bang
5:26
fired rhino thing. I was worried too because I'm
5:29
like, Oh my God, what if it's not the batteries doing all that
5:33
work? A full hour, full hour of just
5:36
changing batteries and then it still doesn't fire.
5:38
I'm like fuck me. Bubbles are back.
5:44
If y'all can hear it, it's the hookah.
5:46
We're back on the hookah shit. I know all high hopes will enjoy
5:52
that he always enjoyed hearing the bubbles in the background.
5:54
My buddy ow. Right on the twat, no.
6:07
So did you hear about the most recent professional athlete to
6:19
get accused of murder? No.
6:26
Professional cornhole player. Awesome.
6:28
That's fantastic. Quadruple amputee is accused of
6:34
shooting somebody. How do you play cornhole as a
6:38
quadruple amputee? Very carefully.
6:42
Do you use your mouth? No, he uses the song, he uses
6:45
the little stomp. Fucking no.
6:49
Can I point out that when you said quadruple, I thought you
6:52
were going to say murder? After that, if you asked me for
6:56
$10,000, what's the next word I'm going to say?
7:00
Amputee would not be on the list.
7:02
It's there was WGNTV made the Facebook post along with 1000
7:10
other news agencies, but this one I found, Oh yeah, it's 100.
7:15
Percent real. It sounds like it.
7:16
Sounds fake. It sounds like 100% real.
7:20
So I have some comments on this post that I thought were
7:24
particularly good. And to go off of what you just
7:27
said, Devin says at no point did I feel safe predicting what the
7:31
next word in this headline would be.
7:33
Yes. Every word, every single word,
7:35
I'm like I. Have no idea.
7:37
That's good. Imagine arresting him as a cop.
7:42
How do you secure this dude? Duct tape?
7:45
Thank you, Andrew. That's like that one.
7:50
Video. We saw and it was like do the
7:57
Midwest safety and it was the machete thing.
8:01
When the paralyzed man kicked in a door, I saw a video where they
8:09
arrested a guy in a wheelchair for allegedly kicking in
8:15
someone's front door and he's like, he's like, is this?
8:18
A joke. I saw that one before he.
8:19
Literally looks up. He's like, is this a joke?
8:21
Like he's totally sober? He's like, what's happening
8:24
right now? The one that they're.
8:25
Like, Sir, we need you to put your hands.
8:26
He's like, if I let go, I'll fall out of the chair, Dick
8:29
head. So he falls out of the I think
8:32
they tased him out of the chair. He's like, God, what the fuck
8:35
are they're like you're resisting.
8:36
He's like, I can't go you. Fucking idiot.
8:40
Like I literally cannot resist. The one that we watched, it was
8:44
like a couple of days ago and dude like macheted the shit out
8:49
of like his girlfriend's mom and they were talking about.
8:53
Oh yeah, meth. Meth and schizophrenia.
8:56
Something about like like they he chopped off her arm or
9:01
something like that. And then you look at the next
9:04
police that was like in the house or some shit, and he
9:06
literally. Oh, the cop didn't have an arm.
9:10
So I was like, how? How is it that he's working this
9:14
case? How was that the ironic twist
9:16
here? And then we were just like,
9:20
unfortunately, making jokes the whole entire time.
9:22
Well my joke was if it were me and his position and I had
9:26
already had a limb I would have looked at the other cops and
9:31
said he got me too like and just kind of lighten the mood a bit.
9:34
Like at least tried. He took my fucking arm.
9:37
He. Took my fucking arm.
9:41
So I'm going to. I've got.
9:42
I've. Got two more.
9:43
I've got two more that I want to read because I I enjoyed this,
9:48
Kevin Jacobson said. If the glove doesn't fit, you
9:51
must acquit. Terrible Jesus.
9:54
And then Deb is going to round this out.
9:57
Thank you, grandma Deb. I don't even know which emoji to
10:01
pick. Wow.
10:01
Or laugh. And then Tara commented under
10:09
that they have yet to invent the emoji appropriate for this
10:12
headline. It's so many things like.
10:17
This happened out of Maryland, by the way, So, so it wasn't
10:20
even Florida. It didn't, which is what you
10:21
would expect it did. Happen.
10:23
It. Did happen and 100% happened.
10:25
He's in jail right now. How did he shoot them?
10:28
Don't know that's where. I'm like.
10:30
So the, the article basically was saying that it was over an
10:35
argument or a dispute over the weekend.
10:38
And I guess he just shot this guy somehow.
10:43
Like, I don't know, It's, it's such a wild headline and it
10:47
doesn't sound real, but it's, it's 100% real, like.
10:52
None of it sounded real handicap guns.
10:56
That's a great question. Jamie, look that up.
11:00
Jamie Jamie's dead. He's been dead.
11:04
Jamie Jamie's a skeleton now. Jamie's been dead.
11:08
Jamie's been dead. So he Jamie's mom.
11:13
It was It was Sunday night when this happened.
11:17
The investigation began when two people flagged down a La Plata
11:22
Police Department officer near the area of this place.
11:28
I guess 2 witnesses told the officers they were in the back
11:31
seat of a car when the driver, identified as Weber, shot and
11:34
killed the front seat passenger during an argument.
11:37
They were in the car and he was driving.
11:41
Fucks sake, the quadruple amputee.
11:43
The quadruple the amputee was driving.
11:46
Apparently it just it does like this.
11:50
This whole thing just gets Wilder.
11:53
I mean, I guess you could have like the prosthetic arms and.
11:56
Yeah, yeah. I mean, there's there's.
11:58
And you could still shoot with a prosthetic arm, right?
12:04
I would assume so, I mean there's videos of him using the
12:09
the blade prosthetic legs during corn holes but I've never I've
12:14
not seen him with prosthetic arms.
12:18
Well, yeah. That doesn't necessarily mean he
12:20
has them. Defense attorney, You.
12:22
Pull. No, but I don't I, I don't know.
12:24
He doesn't even own any arms and legs.
12:27
The fuck they threw it away. So, following the shooting,
12:34
Weber allegedly pulled over near the radio station road and asked
12:38
the two witnesses to help pull the victim from the car.
12:41
However, the pair refused, got out of the car and left the
12:44
scene. Deputies then said he fled the
12:48
scene with the victim still in the car, and the patrol officers
12:54
with the County Sheriff began helping canvas the area where
12:58
Weber might have gone. 2 hours later, a resident in this area
13:05
called 911 to report a body in a yard.
13:08
Then they found the shooting victim dead at the scene and
13:15
they they received an arrest warrant for Weber.
13:19
So it's just, it's just such a wild, wild thing.
13:26
Something something web toes. Yeah, that's phenomenal.
13:34
Oh, oh, even better. They found him at a local
13:38
hospital where he was seeking treatment for an unspecified
13:41
medical issue. No shit.
13:44
Beth, it's. Just so, yeah, it's it's a very
13:48
wild case. What?
13:50
Did the. Rest in peace, but.
13:53
What did the quad paraplegic kid get for Christmas?
13:58
Oh God. Cancer.
14:01
That's good. That's terrible.
14:04
That's so bad. Webbed feet, yeah.
14:10
There you go. It's such a stupid joke.
14:14
I hate that so much. Love it it.
14:16
Works so well it. Really does.
14:20
Well, I have segment. I don't know if you all want to
14:25
do it now, but it's trivia baby. What's the rules?
14:32
I already told you. Well, you told us.
14:34
Yeah, what's, what's the rules? No sports.
14:38
What you got to tell them? No sports, guys.
14:43
Isn't there points? Just kidding.
14:45
Oh my God. I'm pissing you off as much as I
14:51
fucking can, OK? I get another four more weeks of
14:55
you guys dealing with my shit 'cause I'm still pissed anyways.
15:01
It's OK, I'm going to get you back.
15:02
Fuck off, you already got me back, you kind.
15:06
I got some good ones. So the rules are we all are
15:12
going to whatever fucking number because I told you all 10 and
15:15
you guys just decided amongst yourselves to pick however many
15:18
number of. Triggers like I ever put any
15:21
input into this segment. I literally said it's your
15:24
mandate, do whatever you want. Whatever, y'all agreed that it'd
15:27
be too long, so I'm doing 10 questions.
15:31
You guys do however many you want because when we put a
15:33
number to things, y'all just choose how many numbers y'all.
15:37
Do whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
15:40
No, absolutely not. Let's let's reverse this because
15:46
I do have 10. Do you?
15:48
Yeah. No, but I mentioned, I said it
15:50
might be too long of a segment if we all do 10.
15:55
Anyways, So what I'm going to need a pen and paper if you can
16:02
so I can tally up your Hall's points.
16:06
Someone prepared for her own segment.
16:09
Yeah, it's almost like she had plenty of time during.
16:11
Fucking leaving. I'll go.
16:15
Get it? You have a paper thing.
16:18
That's my notes. Anyways, so however many fucking
16:25
questions y'all want to do, do it on the book.
16:28
And then whoever gets the most points, the other two people
16:34
have to buy a gift for the winner.
16:37
What kind of gift? It doesn't matter.
16:39
It's. Going to be a sexual gift.
16:42
Sure. I didn't.
16:44
I didn't have specifics on that. I just said whoever wins gets
16:49
gift from the other two people and if Ryan wins, we both have
16:55
to give him a gift. It's not a couple.
16:57
I'm going to let Ryan win and get him a mold of penis.
17:00
OK. I hate this.
17:02
I hate this so much I just got back.
17:08
Do we have bonus points 'cause I got 2 that could have bonus?
17:15
Bonus points. Can I bet my points to win more
17:18
points? This is like Whose line is it
17:21
anyways, where the points don't matter.
17:23
We'll see how how where it takes us.
17:26
Everything's made-up and the points don't matter.
17:28
And then the other thing is, if the question is a number answer,
17:35
whoever is the closest gets the point.
17:38
I'm not farting, it's the chair. So price is right rules.
17:43
I guess honestly I don't I. Would say just closest in
17:46
general, even if you go over the number.
17:49
That's what I'm saying though. Like if it's like.
17:52
Price is right, if you go over it doesn't count.
17:55
Oh, OK. Yeah, I mean whoever is closer,
17:58
like say one out of 100, you say 98, you say 47, and the answer
18:05
is 50, then you get the point. Can we try 5 questions and see
18:12
how long that takes us? Sure, I'll go first.
18:18
I have good ones. Go ahead.
18:20
Okie, Dokie. Y'all play along at home all?
18:23
Right. If you win, tell us, I'll get
18:25
you a mold of penis. Hell yeah.
18:27
All right, they're. I'll feed you the answers.
18:31
High hopes. They're random.
18:35
Feed them what? The answers.
18:37
So question #1 cows outnumber humans?
18:45
At what ratio in Montana? Montana's a good addition to
18:51
that question. It's where Ryan's from.
18:54
It is. You guys are going to wake up
18:59
with all your stuff out on the curb.
19:01
What's a ratio? So like 5 to 110 to 1 seven to
19:07
three like. I would guess in Montana it's
19:15
something ridiculous. It's like it's got to be like
19:24
600 to 1. OK.
19:30
My guess is I'm going to go much lower, 1:50 to 1:00.
19:44
I ain't afraid of no ghost. You both are wrong.
19:48
The question or the answer is 3 to 1.
19:51
Three to one. OK, really.
19:52
Yeah. That's it, That's it.
19:54
See, originally I was going to say 5:00 to 1:00, but then she
19:56
said 5 to 1 and I was like, there's no way she does the.
20:00
Ratio. The ratio.
20:01
So I was like, I can't say that now.
20:03
That's it in Montana. Nobody lives there.
20:08
Well, I mean the biggest city is like what, 150,000?
20:11
No idea you would know 'cause you lived there anyways the.
20:16
School there. Question #2 what is the
20:22
deadliest job in America? That's a good one.
20:30
Also if you guys are like somewhat close ish to the answer
20:35
I'll give it to you. Commercial fishermen.
20:38
OK. I was going to say deep sea
20:39
fishermen. I can change mine.
20:43
I mean, you both can put fishermen, that's fine.
20:51
Miner. That's a good one.
20:55
OK, you both are wrong. Miners are constantly being
21:01
accosted by streamers. No, not now.
21:07
Bad coal miner, I see. Iron miner do.
21:12
You see that AI picture I made? Not entirely sure.
21:16
So I took the poster for the Goonies and I asked I asked that
21:22
GPT to change Goonies to the Gooners and then add the the
21:29
likeness of popular streamers on top of the characters that are
21:35
in the original Goonies posters. It added doctor disrespect to
21:39
the poster. And I'm like, no, no, you can't
21:43
do that. You can't put him on there.
21:46
Yeah. So ChatGPT doesn't keep up with
21:51
current trends. So the answer that you both said
21:57
is wrong. The answer that it said on the
22:02
whatever thing I was using, it said being president, 9% of the
22:08
presidents have been assassinated.
22:11
That can't be true. Yeah, Only 9% have died and
22:15
that's the deadliest. Have been assassinated.
22:19
So what's the most likely job you'll get assassinated at?
22:23
Like that's not the question I. Don't know that's what it said
22:26
anyways. Question #3.
22:28
Disagree with that? One, that's fine.
22:31
What state has highest percentage of people who walk to
22:35
work? Seattle Estate.
22:41
No. Where's Seattle?
22:44
Washington, Washington. No.
22:47
What's the one on the left side? What are you talking, Oregon?
22:51
Oregon and so Washington is above Oregon, buddy.
22:55
Washington The state is above Oregon on.
22:57
The left side. On the left side of the state,
23:01
on the left side on the West side, and then Washington DC is
23:05
on the East Coast. That's stupid.
23:08
DC is District of Columbia. I.
23:10
Might still say that one on the left side.
23:13
The state to the left of Washington is Alaska.
23:19
Technically. Is that still your answer?
23:27
I'm going to say Oregon. OK.
23:30
I'm going to say New York State. You sure you don't want to
23:34
change your answer? Yeah.
23:38
You both are wrong. It's Alaska.
23:42
Oh, I'm so fucking smart. It says due to high gas costs
23:47
and living on workstations, oil rigs, fishing boats, etcetera.
23:51
Oh yeah. See, I was going based off of
23:55
people walking to go to mass transit and I think New York
24:01
City has the highest like percentage.
24:05
I would agree. It's it's either New York City
24:08
or Chicago has the highest percentage.
24:09
So that's where my thought process was.
24:11
But no, that makes perfect sense.
24:13
It is so funny when the European Kians are like, why can't
24:16
America figure out rail? It's like because your country
24:19
is the size of a postage stamp, that's why.
24:22
My favorite, my favorite thing is when people from the UK say
24:28
that and I'm like, you do realize that the mileage from
24:32
tip to tip of the UK is very similar to the mileage from tip
24:39
to tip of Florida. That's fucking ridiculous.
24:42
And there's how many? The.
24:46
Millions of them. Oh my God, no, absolutely not.
24:49
So, but it's it, yeah, it's London, I think is the biggest
24:55
metropolitan area in the world. You've got Paris on the same
24:58
continent. But that's what I'm, that's what
25:02
I'm saying people, Europeans always say, Oh yeah, well, we'll
25:05
come over here. We want to go see Dallas and
25:08
then we'll we'll go the next day over to LA and then we'll head
25:11
over to New York. And it's like, that's not
25:13
possible. That plan there, that's like a
25:17
three-week, four week plan right there alone, let alone going to
25:21
Disney World or, you know, anywhere else in the country.
25:24
It's nice being like undominatable country, like you
25:31
can't touch us, but then we lose like high speed rail, we just
25:36
can't have it. We have the largest military, we
25:39
can do anything we want. We just can't have rail or
25:41
healthcare. Next question, in what U.S.
25:46
states? Sorry, in what US state are
25:50
there more barrels of bourbon than people?
25:54
Tennessee. Kentucky.
25:58
Ryan is correct. Fuck Bourbon County, Kentucky.
26:04
That's where Jack Daniels is made.
26:06
What also. That was in Tennessee, Kentucky.
26:09
That's why it's Kentucky bourbon.
26:11
What's the Tennessee whiskey? Cold beer on Friday night.
26:17
Nice. Very good.
26:19
What Australian animal poops in cubes?
26:24
Did you say cubes? Yes.
26:28
You say Australian. Australian.
26:30
Read that again. I'm sorry.
26:31
I just, I, I went through and then you said that and I was
26:35
like, wait, what the fuck was the question again like.
26:37
What Australian animal poops in cubes?
26:42
Cubes, I I can't even give you a guess.
26:48
It's going to be like a marmoset or something stupid.
26:51
I don't know what it. Is if.
26:53
If I just threw out a random guess, it would be.
26:57
It's that little fucking chipmunk looking thing that
27:01
always looks happy but it it's like super deadly.
27:05
The copy bearer. No, I don't know.
27:07
That's that dance that they do. Yeah.
27:12
Did you get that? The copy wearer?
27:19
I'm just going to go with Koala. I have no fucking idea.
27:22
What did you say? I said a marmoset.
27:25
Clearly wrong. Yeah.
27:26
Is that a wombat? No, it's not I.
27:31
Could have. I could have been like, yes, but
27:33
I'm not going to, I'm not going to lie.
27:35
All right, I'm. Not going to lie, like you, like
27:38
you. I know I said no sports, but
27:43
technically I've never heard of it and it's crazy and it's not a
27:48
well known sport but it is somewhat of a sport question.
27:51
So. Immediately breaks her own.
27:53
Rules. Is it the WNBA?
27:57
Got em. What sport?
28:00
What sport requires participating to lock toes in an
28:04
effort to pin the other's feet down?
28:09
Jiu Jitsu. Freshman, Freshman.
28:18
Copy where? Freshman grab ass.
28:22
It's a it's a joke from when I was in high.
28:25
School what? Close, but not really.
28:27
I'm not really practical jokers. No, no, it was a it was a high
28:33
school thing. A teacher saw two freshmen like
28:36
starting to fight and so he breaks them up and he goes stop
28:40
playing freshman grab ass and get to class.
28:44
Awesome teacher. It's it's toe wrestling.
28:48
Fuck off. That's dumb.
28:52
What is a group of pandas called?
29:00
Extinct. Very good.
29:07
Endangered. I've actually heard this one.
29:12
I cannot remember. It's it's like a flop, OK?
29:20
I don't. I don't have a good answer, so
29:21
endangered is my answer. They're called an embarrassment.
29:26
Yes, I mean it makes me. Very good, yeah.
29:29
Would you say embarrassment is close to flop?
29:32
I give it to him, you give it to him, give it to him because he
29:35
had a real answer on that one Give.
29:36
It to him. That's my first point.
29:39
You're welcome. What?
29:41
Did you have one? What is the national animal?
29:48
What is the national animal of Scotland?
29:55
A snake. This is good.
29:59
That's good. Snake.
30:05
It's it's going to be like sheep, but I'm going to say
30:08
drunkard. No, you get nothing.
30:14
I thought you were going to say dragon and I was going to give
30:18
it to you. It's a Unicorn.
30:23
That's. Because they were all drunk when
30:25
they decided that. That's not real.
30:26
That's. What it says What 2 states make
30:32
it illegal to get married on a dare?
30:37
So bonus points if you get both of them.
30:39
If you get one of them, I will give you one point if you get.
30:43
Both feel like that's something Nevada would have.
30:45
I was going to say Nevada, you said state.
30:47
Two states? What 2 states make it illegal to
30:50
get married on a dare? Nevada and Utah.
30:55
New Jersey, I'm going to go with a different one because we both
30:58
decided on Nevada. Where's?
31:00
Where's Atlantic City? New Jersey.
31:02
Yep, yeah. So New Jersey and Wyoming.
31:13
I'm going to give you guys another chance.
31:16
Why? Because you're both wrong, so
31:19
that's fine. No, just pick another two more
31:21
states. 30 more questions. I have one more fucking question
31:24
then he's. Got 10 you're.
31:25
Fine. Anyways, pick two more states I
31:28
have. No two more.
31:31
States Seattle one. I would say Iowa and Nebraska.
31:43
OK. Florida and Illinois.
31:45
OK. You're both around.
31:46
It's Colorado and Delaware. Yeah, it was never.
31:49
It's fucking dumb. I'm sorry my questions are dumb.
31:55
Last question. Did we get too wrong now?
32:00
All right. It's a multiple choice.
32:02
OK, Which of the following is a real name for a town in Canada?
32:12
Which of the following is a real name for a town in Canada?
32:16
Come by chance Dildo or spread Eagle Island.
32:22
Dildo. OK.
32:26
And I'll tell you the province that it's in.
32:28
The real name. Which of the following is a real
32:32
name for a town in Canada? Come by Chance Dildo or Spread
32:40
Eagle Island. I'm going to go with a Alex.
32:44
A It's dildo in the province of Saint John's in Newfoundland.
32:48
It would be. The Labrador in Newfoundland.
32:51
So it was a trick question. You guys would have gotten 3
32:54
points if you said all three of them because all of the above.
32:59
Can I just point out she didn't? She said that.
33:01
One, she said. One.
33:03
She also didn't put all the above as an answer.
33:06
Following is a real name for a town in Canada.
33:10
I don't feel bad about Mike. See my questions now.
33:13
You both get a point, right? And those are my questions.
33:17
My questions are boat related. There's a theme I I'm sensing.
33:24
Because I was on the boat all day and I hurt so bad because of
33:27
it. First question, what K word
33:33
measurement of boat speed is a measure of 1 nautical mile per
33:38
hour? Knots.
33:40
One knot. What Ryan said.
33:46
Both correct. Which question 2, Which term
33:53
that describes the turbulent water behind a boat can also be
33:58
part of an expression that means you're in a tumultuous fallout
34:01
of something. Eureka.
34:05
Which term describes the turbulent water behind a boat
34:08
can also be part of an expression that means you're in
34:11
tumultuous fallout of something. Wake.
34:18
And you're going to stay, stay with that, OK?
34:21
It was wake. I it popped into my head as you
34:25
were reading it, and then I was like, no, that doesn't sound
34:27
right. But then I was like, the more.
34:29
That's the only thing I can think of.
34:34
What word is used to describe a floating container anchored to
34:38
the sea bottom so that it remains in position?
34:41
It is often used to mark channels that keep boats safe.
34:47
Buoy, buoy. It is a buoy.
34:48
I was. Going to say anchor.
34:55
What term that might remind you? Question #4 What term that might
35:00
remind you of soccer shoes is also what you call the boat
35:05
fitting that is used to securely keep a vessel docked.
35:08
Is it cleats? Cleats.
35:10
It is cleats. Now for the easy question.
35:17
Question #5 The Japanese yachtsman Kinichihori was the
35:22
first person to use a solar power to cross what body of
35:26
water in 1996. You know, the easiest question
35:31
so far. Do you like how I did that?
35:32
Yeah, the Japanese yachtsman Kanichi Hori was the first
35:38
person to use solar power to cross what body of water in
35:41
1996. The Red Sea.
35:44
Pacific Ocean. It is the Pacific Ocean.
35:48
What a clutch. What a clutch answer.
35:51
I actually fun fact, I actually knew that without like guessing.
35:57
You are now in the. Danger stuff.
36:00
Five questions out of 94 needed for your captain's license.
36:06
Congratulations. Congratulations.
36:10
If you got that right, go get your boating license.
36:13
It's so easy. All right.
36:20
Are you guys ready for mine? No.
36:23
Perfect In 1971, Apollo 14 astronaut Alan Shepard is best
36:32
known for doing what? Fucking bitches and getting
36:36
money. Golfing on the moon.
36:39
Justin is correct. He hit a golf ball on the moon.
36:47
In the world of tech, what does the Bluetooth symbol slash logo
36:53
actually represent? I hate that I know this and I
36:57
forgot it. Oh my God I freaking know this
37:03
one. It's like 2 Nordic symbols for
37:11
something. That's all I got.
37:13
Something about Nordic symbols? I have no clue.
37:19
No, no guess. Fuck bitches, get money.
37:22
You are killing me. This is.
37:23
Your segment, It's Nordic runes for King Herald Bluetooth's
37:27
initials. So Yep, that was #2 let's do #3
37:37
right here. Which famous artist was accused
37:40
of and arrested for stealing the Mona Lisa in 1911?
37:45
Say it again. Which famous artist was accused
37:49
of and arrested for stealing the Mona Lisa in 1911?
37:55
My first guess is Picasso, but that's not correct.
38:00
Hitler. No, it was Pablo Picasso.
38:03
The famous artist Hitler. The famous artist.
38:07
That flunked out of art school. Hitler.
38:10
Speaking, Speaking of art and Hitler, there's a new anime
38:14
called like the Return of Hitler or something or the Rebirth or
38:18
something. It's fucking it looks rice
38:21
crazy. So I did 123.
38:30
This one's fun. This beer was created to spite
38:40
Major League Baseball and is now the top selling beer in 10
38:45
states. Bush.
38:51
Miller Lite. It was Bush beer.
38:54
Fucking ridiculous. The the story behind that is I
38:58
think it's Auggie, one of the Bushes, who owned Anheuser Busch
39:03
and the Saint Louis Cardinals wanted to build their new
39:06
stadium and name it after Budweiser.
39:11
But Major League Baseball had a rule that they could not name
39:15
the stadiums after alcohol. So what he did was he's like,
39:22
fine, name it Bush. It's after my last name.
39:26
And then he went to his Brewers at the Anheuser Busch brewing
39:29
facility in Saint Louis and said, brew a new beer.
39:32
Call it Bush Beer. Awesome.
39:35
And that's how Bush beer came to be.
39:37
Gangster. Bush.
39:40
So what's that? That was #4 yes.
39:46
So I got one more here. Let's see, what is the actual
39:53
name of the hashtag symbol. It's not the pound.
40:01
It is not the pound. I know what it is because the
40:06
second you say it, I'm going to know it.
40:09
Obviously that's how that works. Most times.
40:13
Something phone hash phone. Do you have one?
40:22
Sticky wicket. No, I.
40:24
It's called an octothorp. No, it's not.
40:28
An Octothorp. Do one more.
40:30
Do one more. It's not even real.
40:37
Why one more Is it a tie? Oh, no, I thought it was.
40:45
I thought you and I were tied. I.
40:47
Mean I could do one more. Yeah, I do one more.
40:49
OK. Muhammad Ali lit the Olympic
40:52
flame during the opening ceremony of the 1996 Atlanta
40:56
Games to show a resilience against what disease?
41:02
Aids. Racist.
41:05
Alzheimer's. Parkinson's.
41:09
Damn it. Alzheimer's was a good guess
41:11
though. Which he ultimately came down
41:13
with. Yes, it.
41:15
Was Parkinson's. Well, no, that's why he did it,
41:18
because he had Parkinson's at the time.
41:20
OK? So it was to show the resilience
41:22
against the disease. Yeah.
41:25
Try a new one. Whoop whoop.
41:27
He gets a clone of Willy. Before me what?
41:34
Are you going to do with a clone Willie?
41:36
Whenever you go to Florida and make stupid bits with your best
41:42
bud, I get to go fuck myself while you guys go fuck myself.
41:46
That's going to be the episode of the next bro cast bits with
41:50
my best bud. I love it.
41:53
I'll have to write that down. I also want to say just to spite
41:57
you, Amber, three of the six questions I had had sports
42:01
relation. It's very good.
42:03
What the fuck? Just just to spite you?
42:08
It's very good. So I have a complaint and I want
42:13
to get this off my chest. This is nothing about you too if
42:17
you are with a group of friends, especially if you are women.
42:21
You call them an embarrassment. Well, that that too.
42:25
Pandas A. Bachelorette party.
42:27
It's called an embarrassment. Yes, that's fantastic.
42:29
I love it. Now if you are with a group of
42:33
friends, especially women, and you call an Uber for the
42:39
drunkest one of the party, you proceed to throw her into the
42:45
back seat and then let the guy drive off while she cannot even
42:50
sit up by herself with nobody else in the car to make sure she
42:55
gets home. You are terrible friends.
42:57
You're a piece of shit. Why do you accept the?
42:59
Ride are the worst. Why do you accept the ride?
43:05
Because I was tied at that point, I couldn't just get off
43:11
because what happened was they threw her into my back seat.
43:14
Somebody started to walk around the backside.
43:16
So I thought somebody was getting in and then they all
43:19
left. They all disappeared.
43:21
I'm like, and I'm with a drunk girl who cannot say a single
43:26
fucking word, mind you, laid over in the back seat of my car.
43:33
The fuck am I supposed to do? What happens when somebody gets
43:36
alcohol poisoning and literally like almost dies in your car?
43:40
Like no. To be fair, we did.
43:43
To be fair, we did that to somebody.
43:45
Oh, we've done that a dozen times.
43:46
No, we, it's, we did that when so and so got roofied at the gay
43:53
club. Oh yeah, yeah.
43:55
I think it's less worrisome about a male having that done to
44:01
him. It's still not a good thing.
44:04
No, you're still a shit friend, but if you do that to a female
44:08
and throw them into the back of a car with somebody from the
44:12
Internet, mind you, you called somebody from the Internet to
44:16
come pick up your drunk ass friend who has no ability to
44:21
stop anything, let alone laying on the basically the floor of my
44:26
car. You have no idea who I am as an
44:29
Uber driver. Obviously I'm not going to do
44:32
anything, but that doesn't mean some fucking creepazoid out
44:36
there who's driving Uber who hasn't had the opportunity to do
44:40
something wouldn't take advantage of that opportunity.
44:43
I. Hear those stories constantly.
44:44
It's, it's unreal. It's the IT pissed me off to the
44:50
point of almost calling Uber support sitting there with her
44:55
in the back seat of my car. Does anyone have anything else
44:59
because this just right right into my segment.
45:05
I don't have anything else, I just had to complain about how
45:08
terrible of friends they were. I'm going to say you started the
45:11
meltdown. So since we're on the brink of
45:14
nuclear Armageddon, my segment this week is no longer, at least
45:19
not for this week. No, No comments, no questions,
45:21
no nothing. It is called.
45:23
Thank God for no philosophical fucking questions when I'm arm's
45:27
length away from Ryan. This week it's called the it's.
45:33
Not a new boat, Ryan. She's still wrong.
45:36
I had so many people in my Uber say that I was right.
45:39
That's so funny. No, I didn't record every.
45:43
Person who gets in there where you replay that just that
45:46
section and you're like, what do you think about this?
45:48
That's the guy that has no, like, reason to back up.
45:52
Oh yeah, everybody said I was right because I'm Ryan.
45:57
I literally said that I'm like, I did not record a single one,
46:00
so you just have to take my word at it.
46:03
So I came up with this one because this week I was just in
46:07
a in a mood it, it felt like everywhere I looked and
46:13
everywhere I turned, people were just being insane.
46:19
Just completely and utterly rude and just had no give a fuck for
46:29
your the person next to you who's also going through shit.
46:34
So this week, it's called the Meltdown.
46:37
Would you say that they just listened to give a response?
46:41
I think so, yeah. Love you and.
46:48
You. So we go to the doctor's office.
46:52
Amber's getting injections in her foot, and as we're in the
46:56
doctor's office, it started out good.
46:59
We sat down on a couch that I can only describe as the casting
47:04
couch. Oh yeah.
47:06
I even brought up the meme and I showed Amber the meme of the
47:11
casting couch and she's like, it's the same couch, like the
47:14
same markings. Identical.
47:16
Where people have scratched the sides like.
47:18
Why is it sticky? Yeah.
47:20
I was like when I sat down, I was like, I've been here before,
47:23
I know this. Couch.
47:26
I've been here. I've been here before.
47:28
He's like, why do I know this couch?
47:29
Do we have this couch before? I'm like this couch.
47:33
I was like, it's very similar to the one that we've put in our
47:36
bedroom, but the couch. Listen to what she said.
47:39
The couch we put in our bedroom. Yeah, your boy's a freak.
47:43
He did, and it was a freak. Retroactively adds your face to
47:47
the gooners. Image.
47:50
Can I, can we just pause on what you're about to say and can I
47:54
tell the Freddy Krueger story really quick?
47:56
At the end, OK, so we're in the doctor's office, and the first
48:02
persons who started the meltdown came in Karen Boomer immediately
48:11
demanding more than she should ever, ever, ever speak about.
48:20
She comes in and she goes to this woman at the front desk and
48:24
she goes you, you, you. Coming in hot demands an
48:30
appointment to speak to the doctor right then and there.
48:33
She wanted to talk to the doctor right there and it's 12.
48:37
It is like noon. And they're like, the doctor is
48:42
not here. Or he's clearly or.
48:44
Something, yeah. Because that's how doctor's
48:46
office work, you fuck, comes in, demands to speak to the doctor
48:51
right then and there because she couldn't figure out the app,
48:54
right? She couldn't figure out the app.
48:57
So what she said out loud is, I've called this office 30 times
49:01
and every time it's literally said this number's not in
49:04
service. Why the fuck would you call 30
49:08
times if the number's not in service?
49:12
She brought up the fucking number to the person, and the
49:15
person at the front desk was like, that's not our number.
49:20
I don't know where you got that number, but that's not our phone
49:22
number. Wow, she said.
49:24
I'm running out of pain meds. I'm not leaving here until I see
49:27
him. OK, The very next person, Karen
49:32
#2 fucking boomer. She proceeds to tell the same
49:37
person who is not in charge of maybe not in charge of the
49:41
appointments, but she's definitely not in charge of the
49:44
billing cycles of a fucking. I was the same woman.
49:48
Different person. Really.
49:49
Yep, I thought it was the same person.
49:51
Mind you, I'm on my phone because I don't want to do these
49:54
fucking injections. Also in pain.
49:55
Yeah. She proceeds to tell them I
49:58
didn't make this $8 payment. Somebody needs to fix this now
50:03
because I'm tired of it. You need to fix what you guys do
50:07
here because I'm. I'm done with this and this type
50:10
of billing is unacceptable. She kept repeating you, you, you
50:16
to this woman. You did this wrong.
50:19
You filled this thing incorrectly.
50:21
That one I remember, she was like, I wasn't even here when
50:25
you guys charged my card and I'm like, that's typically how the.
50:32
That's how billing works. So the front desk says that's
50:38
just when the payment was applied, that's not when you
50:41
made the payment. She continues to argue.
50:45
No, I didn't make the payment that day and the front desk
50:50
again. Yes, you're correct, you didn't
50:53
make the payment that day. That's when it was billed.
50:56
No no no that's not when I made. Dude this went on like 3 or 4
50:59
times. I finally stopped.
51:02
Listening. And started writing stuff down
51:04
because I'm like, this is this has gone on long enough.
51:09
We get into the doctor's office, into the room.
51:13
We're across from the nurse's station.
51:17
And for whatever reason, there's like 13 nurses out there.
51:22
There's 5, but it sounds like there's 13 of them.
51:25
And I'm not, trust me, I'm not dogging on anybody.
51:28
It was just the strangest. Encounter.
51:32
Atmosphere of any medical facility I've ever been to.
51:37
It sounds like a DJ is playing at a club.
51:39
Yeah. They're yelling loud enough.
51:42
It sounds like cabana. I wrote down Gaggle.
51:45
Yeah. They're yelling loud enough to
51:48
where I can hear everything they're saying.
51:50
Yeah, in between the occasional ah and yes, just yelling in a
51:58
doctor's office. It sounded like Daz games where
52:01
he comes across the mic and goes.
52:05
Oh my God, dude. They did this for like 25
52:08
minutes. You did that.
52:09
So well too, by the way. That was phenomenal.
52:12
While they're playing, Sean Paul's Turn Me On.
52:16
No, not a joke. I'm not exaggerating.
52:19
They they're playing Sean Paul's turn.
52:22
I'm singing along. Shot, shot.
52:24
Shot, shot, shot. In between Turn Me On, you hear
52:28
in the background what sounds like one of those witches on
52:31
Halloween Spirit Store, and that's someone's laugh from
52:35
outside the door. And I've no clue what's.
52:37
So all of this is going on. The end of the conversation
52:40
where I stopped listening and again started writing stuff
52:43
down. Are we all going to the Little
52:45
Wayne show this weekend? And all of them started chiming
52:48
in about going to the Little Wayne show this weekend.
52:51
I know who's going now. This is the meltdown.
52:56
So we get out, we go to Target, we're standing in the cosmetics
53:02
and three employees are standing still while one actually works,
53:07
the other two were literally leaning against.
53:09
Oh my God, you wrote that down. They're literally leaning
53:13
against whatever the third employee is is is putting away.
53:18
The other two are literally talking about ways to fight a Co
53:21
worker. We're standing 3 feet from them
53:24
my. God.
53:26
So we go to a show and I realize I stand by my statement I made
53:35
about all repo men catching syphilis.
53:37
I still stand by it and I I've been, I've been reassured that
53:41
I'm right. While we're at this show, I
53:43
watched a fucking tow truck. Brand new, really nice 2025
53:47
dually tow truck. Come through the lot and slowly
53:51
creep through every single finger looking for something to
53:56
pick up. Then slowly creeps through the
53:59
parking lot looking for something to pick up, Goes back
54:02
to the front of the parking lot, stops before he leaves, and then
54:07
slowly turns back out of the parking.
54:09
Lot and it's a flea market. Like a massive flea market
54:12
purposely parking. Lot like targeting poor Yeah,
54:16
I'm going to find a car that I repo.
54:18
Here he went. He drove slowly through every
54:22
finger to find a car he could repo or take away with him,
54:26
didn't find any and slowly slinked back out of the parking
54:29
lot. Didn't get out, didn't buy
54:31
anything, didn't even peruse the grounds.
54:35
Just just coming to fuck someone's day up.
54:38
Go fuck yourself. I hope you get syphilis.
54:41
There's. 3 or 4 not his fault but good.
54:44
Continue. These fucking boomers.
54:47
I'm so done with these boomers. There's more.
54:49
So not only as the two boomers at the fucking doctor's office
54:52
were at a show and a boomer comes in between our booths, not
54:58
like in between the stall, like The Walking area.
55:01
She walks in between the stalls, like where we have our stuff,
55:06
just walks in between us into our booth.
55:09
She asks Amber, can I use your phone?
55:12
Oh yeah, I forgot about this crazy bitch and like I'm in a
55:16
mood already. Like I don't.
55:18
Also major tweaker vibes. Yeah.
55:20
And I like, I don't know what it was.
55:23
I don't know if it was depression or what, but I was
55:26
not mentally there the whole, the whole entire day.
55:29
We're there from like what, 9:00 to 3:00?
55:33
Right. And she comes up like behind me
55:37
and she. Again, because she's walking
55:38
into a fucking booth, not in the crowd of people.
55:42
Behind us where our car is parked and where like, like
55:47
where other cars are parked to our vendors.
55:50
And she comes up behind me on my left and she's like, can I
55:56
borrow your phone? And I just kind of look over and
56:00
I have a headphone in my right ear.
56:01
Someone just like what? What?
56:04
She's like your phone. Can I borrow your phone?
56:07
I'm like and mind you she's probably like 60-70 years old or
56:13
something and I just go like for what 'cause my.
56:21
Strange interaction. Mind you, I've had a tracker put
56:24
on my car. I have a whole bunch of like
56:26
things with this whole entire case going on.
56:29
I don't want you using my shit. I don't know who the fuck you
56:32
are. And she was like, oh, something
56:34
I'm looking for my friend. And then she like stops in the
56:38
middle of what she's trying to say and then goes, never mind,
56:41
you're just not going to let me use your phone of.
56:44
Course not. Right.
56:45
And I'm like, I'm about to put like pull my like actual like
56:49
phone to call someone out and I'm just like, OK.
56:56
And then she like, goes behind him.
56:59
She walks back out into the thoroughfare where other people
57:02
are. Behind him though, like the The
57:05
thing is is like you guys aren't going to see it, but I'm going
57:08
to show it to like Ryan. So like my booth is here and I'm
57:12
sitting here. His booth is like kind of over
57:17
where your Santa's we're. Side by side, but also diagonal.
57:24
Up a little bit and he's sitting in between both of our tables so
57:31
she comes up behind him from where I am to his right and as
57:37
she's coming up starts talking to him.
57:42
I didn't hear the phone thing. I saw it, didn't hear it.
57:46
She starts talking and I'm like, hi, how are you?
57:49
And she's like, I'm just looking for my friend.
57:51
And she's like looking past me, like over me, like behind my
57:54
back. Nobody's behind me.
57:56
There's cars parked behind me. Yeah.
57:58
It's not a place for people to. Parked behind me, it's.
58:00
Not a place for people to be. So she gets weird and then she's
58:04
like, can I use your phone? And I'm like, sure.
58:08
And as I go to pull my phone out, she looks at Amber because
58:11
she doesn't know we're together here and goes yeah, because she
58:13
won't let me use her phone. Yeah.
58:15
I heard what happened, like I'm right here with Amber.
58:17
I know what's happening and before I can't even respond, she
58:20
walks back into my booth, through my booth, past me and my
58:25
car to go get to her friend I guess.
58:28
And she's like, oh, she's there. Yeah, I heard her.
58:31
She was like, oh, I found her. She's right there.
58:34
But like the whole interaction was just.
58:37
Very messy bananas. Like boomer shit.
58:40
Just entitlement. Yeah, hated that.
58:42
So the next one is another fucking boomer.
58:45
I know I'm I'm harping on it, but it it, it when they're the
58:49
only ones who do this dumb shit, There's nothing else I have to
58:51
say. They're the only ones that do
58:53
this dumb shit. I'm so done with boomers walking
58:57
around with quote UN quote service dogs that are Huskies in
59:02
86° weather at a flea market in full sun.
59:07
The dog is literally having a heat stroke and he's just
59:10
dragging this Husky around. I'm, I'm just like, I'm fucking
59:15
done with these people. I'm done with this shit.
59:20
So we go to Target again and I go to pull something off a rack
59:29
and it just set me off. Somebody reinvented the hanger
59:34
for no reason. The hanger's been the same for
59:37
4050. Sixty years.
59:39
Instead of having the clip on top of the hanger where your
59:42
garments can hook in and stay on without sliding, some dumb shit
59:47
thought it'd be a good idea to reinvent the hanger where the
59:50
clip is on the inside but it's tucked away so the garment just
59:56
slides off the top. You know how they fixed the
59:58
sliding off the top? Because nobody's going to use an
1:00:01
inboard clip because you can't get your fucking fingernails in
1:00:05
there because it's inboard on the plastic.
1:00:08
Oh, Oh my God. They put 4 little indents on the
1:00:12
top of the hanger so they moved the fucking clip so your
1:00:17
garments fall off. And then they said Oh no we
1:00:20
fucked it up, let's put 4 little indents on top so it's
1:00:24
aesthetic. It's garbage.
1:00:29
Oh. My God.
1:00:31
Garbage. That's my meltdown.
1:00:36
I hope I don't have to do another one.
1:00:39
I hope. I hope so too.
1:00:41
But that's my segment for this week.
1:00:42
If you enjoyed it, let me know. I'm done with this.
1:00:45
I'm I'm going to go full Lewis Black here and just start
1:00:48
yelling at people on the street like.
1:00:50
No 100% like I just I I feel the same way.
1:00:56
I agree. Crazy.
1:01:02
What with the kid? Oh yeah, I fucking missed one.
1:01:05
Sorry. Let me, let me run right back
1:01:08
into it. At the show that we're at, a
1:01:13
boomer is walking by again. I'm not even picking on people.
1:01:18
They're the only ones doing this shit.
1:01:20
A boomer walks by and he hears a what 40 year old papping his kid
1:01:28
on the top of his hand because his kid is constantly picking
1:01:31
shit up off these booths and taking it off and his his parent
1:01:37
goes don't touch by moving his hand off the table.
1:01:42
The boomer thinks it's within their entitled rights to look
1:01:46
this parent in the face and go. So you want to tell your kid not
1:01:51
to touch and then you touch them by to tell them not to touch?
1:01:56
Fuck off with that. That's the best way to correct
1:01:58
them is to guide them and show them hey, this is not Yeah,
1:02:03
that's that's better than hitting them.
1:02:05
Yeah, like a boomer. Would he?
1:02:06
Literally. Papped the top of her hand.
1:02:08
Papp, Papp. No touch.
1:02:09
Not even like a like a hit it was.
1:02:11
Just it was a a tap Papp hap. Yeah.
1:02:13
And moved her hand off the table and the boomer whipped around
1:02:17
like he'd been waiting all day. Yeah.
1:02:19
And he goes. You're going to teach your kid
1:02:20
how to not touch by touching them.
1:02:22
And we're all looking at. He looked at me, the guy was
1:02:25
like, what the fuck did he say to me?
1:02:27
Like he's flabbergasted and I'm looking at everybody else.
1:02:33
And I literally just shook my head.
1:02:34
I'm like, I can't do this today. Like this is, this is, this is
1:02:38
#7 for me today. I'm fucking done.
1:02:41
Like. I'm about to headbutt somebody,
1:02:44
and I even said it to Ambrose like he should have headbutt
1:02:46
him. Yeah.
1:02:47
Like anyway. Well, to hopefully give a little
1:02:54
bit of a laugh after that rage inducing rage.
1:03:00
I've got a joke. I've got, I've got something
1:03:03
that actually happened. My friend Nicole Nikki, who is
1:03:10
gay, very gay, incredibly gay. We were, I don't remember.
1:03:17
We were at one of the bars in downtown Sanford.
1:03:19
What makes her gay, Ryan? The fact that she likes pussy, I
1:03:23
don't know. Jesus Christ.
1:03:26
What do you want me to say? He's like, you're not going to
1:03:29
back me into a corner. She's she's a carpet eater.
1:03:31
What? What do you want me to say?
1:03:32
How? Are you going to say Carpenter?
1:03:34
I'm like that is very good. She's going to be a Carpenter.
1:03:39
Yeah, but she we're at one of the bars downtown and I don't
1:03:45
really remember exactly how it came to be, but it it got down
1:03:51
to the point where she says, and I quote, sometimes I like doing
1:03:57
nice things to you and I go hold on, what to you, to you.
1:04:03
Not for you. Not for you, to you, to you.
1:04:07
OK. And I said what you want to you
1:04:11
want to try again on that because you know this is going
1:04:15
on the podcast, right? So I'm calling you out.
1:04:20
Nicole, lesbian Nicole with air quotations.
1:04:29
Love you bitch. Ryan Ryan had one woman do one
1:04:33
nice thing and he immediately goes on the attack.
1:04:37
She's totally a lesbian. She says she's a lesbian, but
1:04:43
no, I love her to death. My my bit this week is because I
1:04:47
sold the boat. So now I need to know what I'm
1:04:49
going to get next, whether it's going to be I've been looking at
1:04:53
everything. I'm favoriting every post I
1:04:55
showed you last night. I've got 1000 posts on
1:04:58
marketplace clone. Of Willy.
1:05:00
I will get a clone of Willy. So what I look at is the next
1:05:05
car I'm going to get. I was looking at other boats to
1:05:08
get maybe a carport, maybe another motorcycle.
1:05:12
I found somebody listed 20 tons of compost I could use that
1:05:17
augers because I need one of those.
1:05:19
And then I thought to myself, I could just buy an AR with a drum
1:05:22
mag. And then I, I, I thought of the
1:05:24
joke. It's not a waifu, it's a Raifu
1:05:26
I. Fucking hate it you.
1:05:29
Love that, hate it. Here my raifu with with.
1:05:35
Insert amber scag noise here I. Also I don't know how to spell
1:05:39
Raifu so it's RIFUI. Is that close?
1:05:44
Sure, you wouldn't hate it, so get off.
1:05:49
I told I told Amber now that we sold the trawler, can I buy
1:05:54
another trawler? Again, you're a grown ass man.
1:06:00
You make your own decisions. And then my last two notes are
1:06:05
we're going to do a tattoo podcast.
1:06:07
Oh, I forgot to bring the stuff. Amber didn't give me a tattoo
1:06:11
for my birthday. OK, you didn't ask for one.
1:06:15
I did. The 33.
1:06:18
Before we left. No, I'm saying like on my
1:06:21
birthday anyway. You didn't ask on your birthday
1:06:24
or around your birthday. You asked me like 2 days ago.
1:06:27
She listens to respond. Wait, I got two more.
1:06:33
So we're gonna do a tattoo, we're going to do a tattoo
1:06:37
podcast. And I think it's going to go
1:06:39
terribly, like the episode where Stevo got a tattoo while they
1:06:43
were four wheel driving. So I'm assuming it's going to go
1:06:46
that dumb. So we're going to do it as like
1:06:48
a side bit, probably like a Patreon or buy me a copy episode
1:06:51
because it's going to be stupid. I'm not going to be able to know
1:06:54
what I'm talking about, which is probably going to be funnier.
1:06:57
But Amber's going to give me a tattoo while we do a podcast.
1:07:00
And then my next segment that I have for Ryan, I'm going to give
1:07:08
Ryan a time limit of probably 10 minutes and I'm going to ask him
1:07:13
to name a woman starting with the letter of each letter of the
1:07:18
alphabet A-Z. No porn stars.
1:07:24
If you can't name a woman for every letter A-Z within 10
1:07:29
minutes you will buy a full price Angel Reese jersey because
1:07:35
you love women and you're a feminist.
1:07:38
So I told Amber this bit. Amber said who's that?
1:07:44
And I said Angel Reese is the villain to Caitlin Clark's hero
1:07:50
and she said I have no idea what you're talking about.
1:07:55
So we're all going to learn about the WNBA together.
1:08:00
Are you excited for an Angel Reese jersey?
1:08:02
No. Do you don't want an?
1:08:04
Angel, I do not want anything. To take a dress on you.
1:08:06
I wouldn't fuck. Off.
1:08:08
I think she's 69 or something. Yeah, something like that.
1:08:11
She can't even make a layup. Would you like an Angel Reese
1:08:14
jersey? Yeah.
1:08:15
Amber's pouting in protest. Y'all put your segments below
1:08:25
because I do genuinely want to do more interesting things.
1:08:31
I I do really want to do the A-Z.
1:08:33
That sounds hilarious to me. Like just we just go through the
1:08:38
podcast as normal. And it's.
1:08:40
It's 10 minutes of you trying to figure and it's got to be like
1:08:44
known women. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:08:46
And it's not just like Angela. Angela.
1:08:49
No, no, no. I want to know an actual, not
1:08:53
famous, just a known woman where somebody in the zeitgeist would
1:08:57
go. I know who that is.
1:08:58
Like athlete or some some sort of?
1:09:02
Politician it could be. Paul Yeah, somebody that.
1:09:05
Scientific discovery. It could be anything, but it's
1:09:08
got to be the first letter of the name, has to be the name of
1:09:12
the alphabet. I'll give you 10 minutes.
1:09:14
And if you can't do it full price Andrew Reese Jersey
1:09:18
because feminism. I got to start studying.
1:09:24
I can't even name a right now. I'll be honest.
1:09:30
Well, you got to do the mic. No.
1:09:32
What did you say? Fuck off.
1:09:35
What did you say? Doesn't matter.
1:09:37
Can you do a few? Go ahead, do a few so he can't
1:09:43
use them. Anne Hathaway, Betty White Can't
1:09:48
think of CE. David Lee Roth for Caitlyn.
1:09:50
Clark, Caitlyn Jenner. I'm not going to make any jokes.
1:09:59
She got Woman of the Year, she killed somebody and she got
1:10:02
woman of the Year. I'm not.
1:10:10
I'm I'm just going to be quiet. There's way too many jokes I can
1:10:14
make that will get me in trouble.
1:10:18
So put your segments below. I'm very excited to see what
1:10:21
y'all come up with but for now enjoy the rest of your week.
1:10:28
I know I will here in this beautiful Florida weather.
1:10:32
There was there was a breeze today in the parking lot.
1:10:36
I've had a breeze in SO. Long it had.
1:10:39
So many breezes they're. Not sea breezes.
1:10:43
I could smell the ocean. I was like.
1:10:44
We literally like a month ago it was in Myrtle Beach.
1:10:49
I didn't think it was a month ago.
1:10:55
Hey today.