Latest / The Original Self Podcast / Episode 21-Food Addiction and The Science Behind Diet Culture Guilt

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Episode 21-Food Addiction and The Science Behind Diet Culture Guilt · The Original Self Podcast

0:13
Welcome to the Original Self podcast. I'm Evet
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DeCota, owner of DeCota Life Coaching and a psychology
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-informed life coach exploring resilience, mindset,
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and the courage to become your authentic self.
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This is a space for honest conversations about
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growth, identity, relationships, and all the
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messy moments in between that shape who we become.
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Between the salon chair and coaching sessions,
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I've watched people move through life in patterns
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they rarely notice. Patterns that are subtle,
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familiar, and incredibly hard to see from the
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inside. Last time in episode 20, we talked about
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what your body is doing during menopause. the
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shifting hormones, the changing hunger signals,
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the cravings that seem to arrive right on schedule
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every evening. We close with a question worth
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sitting with. What if the story isn't about what's
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wrong with your body, but about what your body
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is renegotiating? Today we carry that same question
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to a place that's a bit harder to reach. We've
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spent five episodes looking at the system around
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us and the body underneath us Now we turn toward
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the self and toward the words. We've been using
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about what we eat Welcome to episode 21 food
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addiction food shame and the cheat day lie So
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Let's start with a question many of you have
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probably asked yourself at some point, usually
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somewhere between the third and fourth slice.
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Am I addicted to food? I don't think that's a
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small question. And for a long time, the scientific
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community didn't agree on how to answer it, but
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that's starting to change. Sometime in late 2025,
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an international group of researchers and clinicians
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who study this area completed something called
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the Delphi Process, which is basically a structured
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way of getting experts to work toward an agreement
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on a contested question. They all proposed the
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name Ultra Processed Food Use Disorder. and concluded
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that this pattern behaves primarily like a substance
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use disorder, rather than just a behavioral habit
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as they've thought for years. One researcher
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suggested that this disorder should be included
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in future editions of the psychiatric diagnostic
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manual. The tool that most often was used in
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this study to figure out if it's a disorder is
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called the Yale Food Addiction Scale. It takes
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11 of the criteria used to diagnose substance
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use disorders, things like loss of control, cravings,
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withdrawal, and continuing to use something despite
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real consequences. They applied all of those
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to the same criteria to eating. Using this measure,
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researchers estimated that around 14 % of adults
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meet the criteria that would qualify as a substance
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use disorder if we were talking about alcohol
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instead of food. Not all of the researchers agreed.
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They stated that they needed more evidence before
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formalizing a diagnosis. Other questions concern
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whether what we're measuring is truly addiction
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or whether it's a predictable response to an
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environment engineered for overconsumption, which
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is what we talked about in episode 16 and 17.
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From that perspective, the issue isn't addiction
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in the traditional sense. It's a rational response
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to an irrational food supply. But one area that's
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getting more attention is withdrawal. That's
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traditionally been considered a core marker of
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addiction. And some early studies report withdrawal
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-like symptoms when people significantly reduce
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highly processed foods. They have symptoms of
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irritability, fatigue, and mood changes within
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the first day of reducing those foods. That evidence
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is still developing and researchers are careful
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not to overstate it, but it's part of why the
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substance use conversation has gained traction
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rather than just disappearing and no one talking
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about it anymore. This is how I think about it.
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Food is an alcohol and it's not cigarettes. I've
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said this before, you can quit drinking and you
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can quit smoking, but you can't quit eating.
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For every model of addiction that researchers
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have built, it assumes recovery involves some
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version of abstinence, putting the substance
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down for good. Food doesn't allow for that though.
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You have to sit back down at the table tomorrow
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and the day after that for the rest of your life.
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The single fact is what makes this question so
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complicated. Is food addiction real? I have said
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before that I quit smoking after smoking a pack
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or more per day for 13 years. I've never looked
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back. It was very hard to quit and I always say
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I will never smoke again because I'm never quitting
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again. With that said, the sugar and hyper palatable
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food pull is a constant for me for my entire
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life. I barely drink alcohol, I don't smoke,
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and I try to eat foods that are nourishing to
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my body, but I'm always thinking about sugar.
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I've gone to nutritionists thinking that, you
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know, yet another plan mapped out for me will
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solve my problem. I've seen a food therapist
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in hopes that something deep inside me needs
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nourishing and that would solve my cravings.
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I've gone to food retreats where I have meditated
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and participated in exercises that try to make
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me realize that it's not hunger, it's the soul
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crying out for more. None of that worked. Maybe
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it worked for others, it didn't work for me.
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This is what fascinates me. Some of the strongest,
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most resilient people I know have rebuilt entire
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lives after unimaginable loss, but they still
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describe feeling powerless around certain foods.
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We know by now that it's not a lack of discipline,
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right? It's trying to rebuild a relationship
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with something we have to interact with all the
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time. That's a completely different challenge
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and it's why the research matters beyond the
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label. Researchers are now developing screening
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tools clinicians can use in ordinary medical
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visits. The kind of questionnaire a doctor might
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hand you alongside the usual intake forms. In
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this research, early findings suggest a meaningful
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overlap between this pattern and conditions like
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type 2 diabetes, where the two may make each
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other harder to manage. So this is not an abstract
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academic argument. It's shaping how treatment
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gets built even before diagnostic manuals catch
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up. But whatever label eventually sticks, a diagnosis
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is not a life sentence. It's a way to understand
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and then move forward with the information you
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have. When we recognize ourselves in these patterns,
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that's information. It's information about the
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mechanisms. It has nothing to do with your worth.
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The name we give that experience may continue
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to evolve. Researchers may keep debating whether
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addiction is the right framework, whether another
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explanation fits better or where this belongs
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in the future of treatment. But while the scientists
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work through that language, millions of people
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are living with the experience. And whatever
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we eventually call it, turning that experience
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into A judgment about ourselves creates shame
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and helps no one. The purpose of understanding
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the mechanism was never to assign ourselves another
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label to carry. It was to finally have enough
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information to actually put one down. So there's
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a pattern so many of us know intimately, even
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if we don't have a name for it. Many people experience
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this as a personal struggle they can't quite
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understand. But the research shows that it follows
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a predictable cycle. It's called the binge restrict
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cycle, and it moves through four stages. The
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first stage is restriction. It may look like
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skipping meals, cutting out entire food groups,
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counting every calorie, are building a long list
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of rules about what you're allowed to eat and
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when. From the outside and often from the inside,
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this phase feels like discipline. It feels like
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it's working. That's part of what makes this
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cycle so difficult to recognize. Restriction
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usually doesn't feel like the beginning of a
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problem, right? It feels like the moment you
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finally decided to solve one. It comes with a
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sense of control, a plan, and that familiar thought,
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this is the thing that's finally going to work.
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I can say honestly, I have tried every one of
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those restrictions I just mentioned countless
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times throughout my life. The second stage is
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craving. Restriction can send messages to your
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brain. and to your body that something important
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is unavailable. Your body responds to scarcity
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by turning up the volume on hunger and repeatedly
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pulling your attention toward that restricted
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food. But craving is different from hunger because
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hunger is the body asking for energy. Craving
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is targeted and specific. It's the food that
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you decided was off limits, but suddenly seems
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to be everywhere. You notice it more, you think
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about it more, and then you start negotiating
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with yourself around this food. Maybe I'll just
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have one. Maybe I'll wait until the weekend.
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Maybe I'll just leave the house so I don't think
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about it anymore. The more attention The brain
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gives something, the more important it starts
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to feel. The food didn't change. Your relationship
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with the food has. This is an ancient survival
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system responding the way it was completely designed
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to respond. For most of human history, directing
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attention to something scarce helped keep us
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alive. The problem is that today, That same system
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is responding in an environment where restriction
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and abundance can coexist at the same time. The
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third stage is the actual binge. This is the
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point where the tension that's been building
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finally breaks. It often looks like eating past
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fullness, eating very quickly, or eating the
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very foods that were restricted in the first
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place. For many people this stage feels super
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confusing because it doesn't always feel like
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a conscious decision Sometimes I could feel like
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something switches from thinking about the food
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to needing the food The same food that was avoided
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for days or weeks months suddenly becomes the
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thing your brain is pushing you towards and Once
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that rule is broken Another thought enters the
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conversation. Well, I already messed up today.
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Might as well keep going. That one thought alone
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can turn a moment of eating into something much
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bigger. The fourth stage, the final stage, is
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guilt. You see, the problem with guilt is that
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it doesn't usually end the cycle. It often becomes
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the reason for the next round of restriction.
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reinforcing the very pattern you were trying
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to escape. There's also a physical layer beyond
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the psychological pull. Research suggests that
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long standing binge restrict patterns can affect
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things like hunger hormone regulation and insulin
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sensitivity. That cycle can leave a physiological
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imprint. like where the body adapts to an unpredictable
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food supply in the same way it would if scarcity
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of all food were real instead of self -imposed.
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This cycle doesn't just stay connected to the
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appetite restriction and the anxiety it produces
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can disrupt your sleep, whether that's being
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too hungry to settle at night or from the physical
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discomfort that follows a binge. Poor sleep then
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feeds back into the whole system, since we already
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know from episode 18 that a tired prefrontal
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cortex is a weaker break, like breaks in a car.
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Mood follows a similar pattern. Research on this
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cycle consistently links it with higher rates
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of anxiety and low moods, depressed feeling.
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They're not a completely separate issue running
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alongside eating, but it's like it's part of
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the interconnected system. And nutrition itself
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plays a role in the brain's emotional centers.
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So when intake becomes uncertain, mood often
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becomes unpredictable right along with it. The
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pull toward the very thing you try to avoid is
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something researchers have studied. It's sometimes
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called the forbidden fruit effect and it describes
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how foods can become more appealing and take
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up more mental space simply because they've been
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restricted, independent of how the food actually
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tastes. That restriction changes the food relationship.
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I'm sure that many of our experiences involve
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putting a food on the, nope, I can't eat that
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food list. And then your brain begins to find
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every reason to think about it. Or even better,
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every commercial or cooking show you watch shows
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that specific food that you actually sent into
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the no -fly zone. Right now, picture the food.
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or an entire group of food that makes this scenario
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sound familiar to you. For me, in this scenario,
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I'll decide Monday morning that carbs like pasta
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are officially off the table for the week or
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completely off the table forever. And I'm sure
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that'll totally work out for me. But by Wednesday
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evening, I've thought about the Orchietta Il
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Davide plate from my favorite restaurant around
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the corner. more times than you can count, despite
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not having thought about it once the week before,
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when it was allowed in my mind. That's the forbidden
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fruit effect. It shows up in everyday life. I
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once read an article by the author Janine Roth,
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and it was called Kindness in Calories. She told
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the story of a mother whose daughter always snuck
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sweets and was rapidly gaining weight. The mother
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was super concerned because she had been an overweight
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child herself and she wanted to prevent the same
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fate for her daughter. So the mom took sweets
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away from her child and kind of admonished her
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for her body shape for gaining weight. Roth suggested
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something that I'm sure felt very counterintuitive
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to the mother. She told her to fill a pillowcase
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with M &Ms, and whenever it got even a quarter
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empty, fill it back up again. She also suggested
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to the mother to stop making ill remarks about
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her daughter's body. At first, this young girl
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carried the pillowcase everywhere. But then slowly,
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something changed. The candy, when the candy
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stopped being scarce, it stopped holding the
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same power over the child. If you've lived this
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cycle, and my guess is many of you have, I just
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want to say diet culture markets restriction
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as the solution to exactly the problem restriction
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helps create. The advice is almost always to
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restrict harder, follow more rules, and eliminate
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more categories. I have seen this my entire life.
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And because restriction can produce short -term
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results, maybe even weight loss in the first
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few weeks, a sense of control in that moment
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looks like it's working, right? Right up until
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the body response catches up with it. I think
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most people never connect their own binge back
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to the restriction that it came before it. I
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know I didn't. We just experience the binge as
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more evidence for the belief that we can't be
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trusted around food. And then we reach for more
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restriction to correct it. That's the loop closing
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in on itself. Can we start to question the rules
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we were handed and the ones we eventually place
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on ourselves? Because maybe the way out of the
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cycle, it's not another rule. Maybe it starts
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with understanding why the rules had so much
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power over us in the first place. So if the binge
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restrict cycle is the mechanism, then the cheat
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day is the mechanism with a calendar attached
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to it. Plan the restriction for six days. Plan
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the loss of restraint for the seventh. Call it
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a balance. Words like cheat, clean, good, and
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bad, they don't just describe food. Over time,
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and I've heard it a million times, they start
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describing how we see ourselves. A cheat day
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implies that eating a food you enjoy is something
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you get away with, something that requires an
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exception to be granted. Many dieticians and
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eating disorder clinicians point out that moralizing
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food can increase guilt, shame, and how much
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mental space the food takes up in your brain.
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This is the opposite of what anyone wants from
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a system that's supposed to make eating easier.
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But notice what this language does to the rest
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of our week. If Saturday's the cheat day, when
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we're allowed to enjoy food, then Monday through
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Friday becomes the day you're supposed to earn
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it. That's a lot of days spent turning an ordinary
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food choice into something loaded with rules.
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The negotiating, the meaning. And as we just
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learned, restriction sets up the next binge.
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The cheat day doesn't always prove to be the
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release valve, it's marketed as. I think it becomes
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another version of the same cycle, except this
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time, the rules are organized around the calendar.
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I've done this for decades. I can remember ending
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a day and mentally reviewing everything I ate.
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If it were on paper, I would have needed a red
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pen to mark every lapse in judgment that I thought
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I had made. Red marks if I didn't stay on track.
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If I messed up and forgot to count the wintergreen
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mint I shoved in my mouth after drinking coffee.
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I would assess whether today's food intake made
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for a good day or a bad day. It was so exhausting.
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It took me a long time to notice that the scorecard
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itself, not the dessert, was the thing that was
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causing the stress, the judgment, and ultimately
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the damage to me. There's another side to this
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conversation. Some researchers have found that
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including enjoyable foods intentionally, can
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help people feel more satisfied and maintain
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a way of eating that works for them in the long
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term. I don't think that finding cancels out
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everything we just covered. I think it points
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to something more specific. The difference isn't
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whether you plan the food, it's the meaning attached
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to it. A cheat day's plant, But there's a big
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difference between deciding you'd like pasta
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on Friday because you enjoy pasta and declaring
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Friday the only day you're allowed to have the
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pasta because every other day it represents failure.
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It's the moral language wrapped around allowed
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and not allowed. When I look at cultures where
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food is approached with more flexibility, I think
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it offers a different way to think about our
25:11
relationship with eating. Pasta isn't saved for
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Saturday. Dessert's not treated like contraband.
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In these cultures, food is woven through life
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rather than rationed out on a schedule. And cravings
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tend to soften, not disappear entirely. Once
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a food stops being treated as a rare treat, you
25:36
have to earn. Letting go of the moral scorecard
25:41
entirely reduces the weight of forbidden foods,
25:44
which means that there's less for the binge restrict
25:48
cycle to hold on to. It means the structure stops
25:53
being built around morality and starts being
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built on what actually helps you feel good in
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your mind and body. concept. So let's bring these
26:05
three threads together. The biologically driven
26:10
addiction process is still being studied. The
26:13
way the body responds to scarcity, whether that
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scarcity comes from the outside world or from
26:19
rules we created ourselves. And then there's
26:22
the moral weight we assign to foods that eventually
26:26
gets turned inward. Not one of those three issues
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changes by adding another layer of judgment.
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That's the piece I really want us to focus on.
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The shift happens when we trade our shame for
26:43
curiosity. When we stop asking, what's wrong
26:47
with me? And start asking different questions.
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Like what patterns keep repeating? What rules
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did I inherit that I never stopped to question?
27:01
And then maybe we finally reached that discovery
27:04
moment of no wonder it's all felt so confusing.
27:10
Because understanding the pieces is what calms
27:13
the chaos. What's easy to miss is in all of this,
27:20
that curiosity isn't the same as permissiveness.
27:24
And it's not the same as giving up on caring
27:27
for yourself. It just means we stop using shame
27:32
as a strategy. Asking what's happening here is
27:38
still an act of care. Sometimes often more reflective
27:42
one. Because it gives you something you can actually
27:46
work with. Where blame keeps you stuck repeating
27:50
the same conversations with yourself. Curiosity
27:54
helps you understand the conversation you've
27:56
been trying to have for years, for decades. That
28:02
understanding is where we can finally start asking
28:04
the next question. What is the behavior trying
28:08
to do for us? There was a version of you long
28:15
before you learned which foods were supposed
28:17
to be good or bad and who had a different relationship
28:21
with eating. No scar card, no cheat days, no
28:26
chapters of rules to memorize. That version of
28:31
you has not disappeared. It just got layered
28:35
over the same way we talked about it in every
28:37
episode of this series. Layered over by systems,
28:42
by biology trying to protect you. And now, by
28:46
vocabulary that turned eating into a moral report
28:51
card. If there's one thing I hope you carry away
28:55
from this episode, it's permission to retire
28:59
a few words. Cheat, clean, good, bad. They're
29:08
never accurate food descriptions to begin with,
29:12
nor were they accurate descriptions of you. Changing
29:17
the way we talk about food is also an opportunity
29:19
to change the way we talk about ourselves. because
29:23
they are completely interconnected. In the next
29:29
and final episode of this series, we're going
29:32
to talk about what happens after we understand
29:35
the rules. How do we tell the difference between
29:38
a body asking for food and an emotion asking
29:41
for comfort? How do we rebuild trust with ourselves
29:45
after years of second guessing? Episode 22 is
29:50
Coming Home. learning to trust yourself again.
29:55
Thank you for spending this time with me today.
29:57
If you'd like to learn more about working with
29:59
me, all my contact information is in the episode
30:02
notes. I'll see you next time and I hope you
30:06
have a great day.