Latest / Inspiring Human Potential / 5D SEE Relationships, love language, secure & non-secure attachment, couple bubble & codependency

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5D SEE Relationships, love language, secure & non-secure attachment, couple bubble & codependency · Inspiring Human Potential

• 0:01
  Welcome back to my lovely HP. Video podcast, short Watchers,
• 0:08
  I'm used to sing listeners. Good morning your, let's have
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  some coffee together. It is time for a new adventure
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  and today we get to talk a little bit about those lovely
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  relationships to 5 DC way for my Enlightenment.
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  So the age group or the other still age groups but the sea is
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  for self-empowered, enlightened Dad.
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  Anyone who knows that mindset is everything that the way you
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  perceive things makes a difference, I get to learn from
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  a lot of different Educators. They are trauma Educators.
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  So they are therapists clinicians from different walks
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  of life, but all of them are staying updated with the new
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  information that our lovely technology gives us time to see
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  and look into and they are all. Dedicated and devoted to helping
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  people to know how to achieve inner well-being and I have
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  added to my curriculum mindfulness practitioners on the
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  Lovely List. And we'll see how many of these
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  different items inform me of the same thing.
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  And then support me to support you and to keep on expanding any
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  person who wants to be their infant higher human
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  consciousness potential to keep doing so, so being yourself.
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  Let's start with that one, it's very straightforward.
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  For the person who has a restorative embodied self who's
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  able to navigate their integrated mind.
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  So they left and right mode in a uniform fashion and this
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  achievement for some of us comes naturally.
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  The individual who tends to have a lot of cycle because we won't
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  have an inner critic or outer critic in our mindset.
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  Will have a contemplative moment and more, and In Equanimity,
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  which is the neutrality. That doesn't mean you're
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  indifferent. It's the neutrality.
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  That means I'm going to look at my likes.
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  I'm going to look at my dislikes and as one individual on a
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  planet with eight billion individuals, or even if I'm in a
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  household with three, four, you know, or one another depends,
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  I'm still a differentiate itself.
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  So the 5D person whoever is inclined to already be here is
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  going to be a person who knows Mention of the self.
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  So their thoughts and their emotions are managed by the
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  person. That's what we get to talk
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  about. And why it's so important with
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  relationships, soul of language, only involves compassion and
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  involves understanding, or hearing yourself.
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  When you do, shame blame fault or even revenge.
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  And when I say hearing it would be the awareness mindfulness
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  that any person can have active all on their own, if their own
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  limbic system, of course, and I see limbic system because I
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  learned from Daniel, Seagull, that our limbic system actually
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  alerts us to what has value for us.
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  So, if you're emotional spectrum, is valuable to me, I
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  will manage my temperature. Meaning my charge, meaning might
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  own meaning a lot of things. But the only people usually
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  that. That's a bit more challenging
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  with, for any person, is the immediate family.
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  So, the parent or parents and your siblings.
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  Why? Because you grew up with them.
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  And what you can learn. If you learned good, trauma
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  cymatics information, they say good because they're rigid
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  Educators who dismiss compassion dismiss emotions and apparently
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  are not in the knowing of the nervous system sympathetic
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  parasympathetic. They do know about the
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  two-year-old, but they're not aware of the breakdown of how
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  reactivity works. And so they don't believe in the
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  other information. There's some who don't even
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  Believe yet ended mirror neurons for example, practitioners
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  because in a field and as an academic, I well know how this
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  works and it's a very sad thing. But then again that's how it
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  works, to accumulate data, to learn things to open minds, and
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  to debate. Because the Educators to
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  researchers or people who enjoy learning, they're going to be
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  busy continuing to explore because that's the point of how
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  it moves forward. You know, human evolution at all
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  somehow some For educators, are not professionals or not think
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  that a certain point you can have all of the information and
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  then you have to do it just one way.
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  And it's really a challenge for me to hear someone think of
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  themselves as an educator, or as a person who is intelligent,
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  when they decide that all the information from yesterday's.
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  Correct. And anything, you must be
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  something that is BS. Is like okay if you say so but
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  that's the ridge. Did mind of an adoptive child
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  trying to prove, you're right or wrong, trying to control the
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  situation or person and here's where there's so many facets
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  tough. This takes place at not just
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  relationships worldwide, we've seen it, we keep seeing it.
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  It's explainable in the absence of a devil or evil or of a
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  conspiracy, it's explainable humanly speaking, your mind is
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  what controls all of what's happening, but your emotions
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  this lovely nervous. And the charge states of you as
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  you grew up are what are going to be controlling you until you
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  move into being a functional adult?
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  And so that inner growth mindset or mindset that allows you to
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  expand his, what's important? If you have an inner critic,
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  which is part of a shame cycle. If you have an outer critic,
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  which is part of a shame cycle, not going to move out of any
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  type of conflict that is from within.
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  And here's where people will hold implicit or explicit.
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  It memory charge States not affect their temperament and
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  their interactions and they will call it.
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  That's my motion and I'm going to stay this way or they will be
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  ashamed of their triggers and all those are not necessary.
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  So when 5dc person is in their relationships, we don't treat
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  our loved ones with shame the town part.
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  It's easier to do it with the individuals, you grow up with
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  once you get grown up with Household.
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  That's where you'd find dynamics that take place in a way that is
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  raw. And in fact here's where when I
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  took the inner engineering course with said groom which is
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  really lovely. He talks about our loved ones,
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  being quality control and I would agree quality for those
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  who are not yet their functional adult and want to be for those
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  of us who instead are the functional adult, they get us to
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  keep practicing to expand our window welcome and our window of
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  love, which is is unconditional and to lead our relationships
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  with unconditional love because that's what Safe Harbor and safe
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  launching pad means. And so some people didn't have
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  that growing up. So they have a non secure
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  attachment or even if they have security attachment, they have
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  these charge states that they begin justifying because we
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  justify the temperature, I got pissed because you did this
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  thing to me. So when you justify the emotion,
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  you're not working with it. You can't master your emotional
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  playing for my 5D, DC Mystics. And you're not going to become
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  forgiving new ones. Now, some people they don't want
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  to, they just want to be a part of their group, they feel safe.
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  They're happy when they're with another group.
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  They don't care about how they treat them.
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  They don't care about these emotions and they don't really
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  know that when you hear a said, grew by the way and he says be
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  responsive not reactive in this inner engineering course.
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  One of the people in the class is like what do you mean?
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  I I'm not responsible for, you know, this in this and that and
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  I have Have just recently I think started learning about the
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  mine from Daniel Siegel and I was like, no, or maybe was after
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  but I realized that what he was talking about, can be explained
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  the human way, which is when you're energized and you're not
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  able to take a step back, you're being reactive, you're not
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  responding what you also find out as you study the human body
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  and thank you Stephen porges for this is that we have what is the
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  biological Roots state of us? Which is Red or yellow.
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  That's in our and gets the sympathetic or the door.
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  So of legal or it might be fight flight.
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  But the green is, when you're engaged in your social
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  engagement system, so the eventual Bagel nervous system
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  and that would be the more the newer parasympathetic nervous
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  system branch that came around once we moved into being
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  mammalians and I don't remember how that works but the brain
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  goes through whole development as well.
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  Again, relationships, we Actually moved into becoming
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  mammalian and and caring for each other.
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  Until that moment, I forget how they explained it The
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  evolutionary science or The evolutionary psychology, people
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  have to get that data. But meantime, once you became
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  these, mammals and we had the ability to feel emotions and in
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  a way of connecting them to each other.
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  Not just being because the Older Branch, The Reptilian older
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  Branch parasympathetic nervous system has fight, flight freeze
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  and I will believe that the attached cry collapse admit,
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  please appease are also part of that Branch.
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  So that's a defense both, our ancestors had defense mode until
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  they were able to, then have this mammalian mode, which is
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  the social mode and I am not the expert at hand.
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  It's passing on information that I'm learning though.
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  So I will I get it always accurate, long story short,
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  though, we're meant to be together and we will have
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  learned how to self-regulate based on co-regulation if the
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  household is in safe. That means we don't know how to
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  self-regulate in a way that allows us to activate our social
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  engagement system and asked human for just presents.
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  We have this default mode Network that has this oats this
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  other in the self, and it's always scanning.
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  So if you are a person who's consistently scanning your
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  territory, and in defense mode, you're more likely to be wanting
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  to hug a tree and not a person. And that's where I see a lot of
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  people secure attachment or not disorganized attachment is even
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  more upsetting and sad because that type of individual has an
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  intertwined defense mechanism and attachment system.
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  So they will want to attach. Like I mean person will so to
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  create relationships, but Their flight fight, Freeze or attached
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  cry collapse admit, please appease will always be engaged
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  as well, and that will create a fragment itself, which is very
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  confusing for them. And that's probably very
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  upsetting. Not to mention, they will feel
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  different and off and I see Humanity not really treating
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  each other nicely. I'd say that doesn't help them
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  at all. And so for my 5dc Mystics those
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  of you who are in your Enlightenment so a droop or at
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  the very least people who pick up on your over soul in a
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  collective you will be those lightworkers that I heard so
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  much about and that's where we get to be safe, havens or safe
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  spaces for people to be able and grow up if they want to those
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  who want to expand their consciousness.
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  And that's why it's very important to keep in mind that
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  every person has a story, they don't even know about it and
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  they might never know about it. And that's not important.
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  What's important is that if they find a welcome if they find the
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  ability to be themselves, if they find softness while also
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  being direct. So there's always been true.
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  Bagel knows which people don't like in general but the adoptive
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  child learns to adapt and learn To be loved and then learns that
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  it's still safe to be themselves, which is what gives
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  them the room to move into their restorative embodied self.
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  And if they want to create a tendency of resiliency and using
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  their own social engagement system, but they'll get to
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  choose that one because some people as I said, they will
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  marry those groups that have rigid leaders and rigid thinkers
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  because when that happens the brain has this way of feeling
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  good about being welcomed by those who think the same.
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  So The adoptive child is going to find those who agree with
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  them about being right and have the same list of items and this
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  oxytocin is released because of course, they're welcomed in that
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  group and when they're around the other group they're not
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  feeling welcomed their they're feeling different.
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  The perception of yourself though and of others is what's
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  very very important. In fact on that data point.
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  Let me read a couple things. So here's Jessica Fern poly.
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  Secure the statement that I'm reading is on chapter 5
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  attachment and now On monogamy. Authors on attachments your
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  theory will assert that being pair-bonded is the prototype for
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  attachment in adulthood. That couples need to create a
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  couple bubble around them in order to ensure security and
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  that your partner needs to be the one single or main person
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  that you emotionally depend on. I question if these criteria are
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  even healthy from a monogamous standpoint open parentheses.
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  A considerable amount of the mono romantic ideal can actually
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  be codependency. See in Disguise close
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  parentheses comma but at the very least we can see how these
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  ideas and assumptions within the field of attachment are
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  excluding people in CNM relationships which is for
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  forget always that word shoot. I don't know why it doesn't want
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  to stick anyways. People who know the acronym.
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  I'm going to look it up but I always forget consensual
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  non-monogamy, thank you, there you go.
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  And another data point now, this one's from A group of therapists
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  that I'm learning. Thanks to my subscription with
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  an ICBM. And I believe it was ebony that
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  mentions this no, no. We showed some Allah Nara.
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  I think I pronounce her last name, right?
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  I hope so. And she was sharing with us in
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  this segment where we learn about repair and rupture about
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  the study a study that was done in 2020.
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  This is by Samantha Jo Lynn Paul Eastwood They sampled or
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  surveyed 11,000 couples and they had 43 different datasets.
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  These were all to determine relationship satisfaction and
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  what it was based on and they used machine learning to
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  quantify the predictive power of different variables among these
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  couples and what they found was that people's own judgments
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  about the relationship like how satisfied and committed.
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  They perceive their Partners to be and how appreciated they felt
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  towards their partner. How appreciative they were turns
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  their partner, all of this explain about 45% of their
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  satisfaction in the relationship.
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  So it wasn't about personalities.
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  It was about the dynamic of the actual relationship that
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  contributes to the satisfaction of the relationship.
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  The aspect about personality. And fact, again gets put to the
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  side because it's not the personality changing.
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  We are not who you are that. That will affect how the
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  relationship is the five top variables.
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  That explain the most variants in relationship satisfaction.
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  Our perception that your partner is committed to you appreciating
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  the partner sexual satisfaction for your perception of how
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  satisfied the partner is. So if a person perceived that
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  the partner is less satisfied, that will affect their one's own
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  satisfaction and five, Flicked and how conflict is dealt with?
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  The data point that I was looking to share from Ebony.
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  Instead, as we concluded this, entire module was where she
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  shares. How it's how we relate to things
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  that make a difference and determine our well-being.
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  And it's also if you're able to see in the lens of somebody
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  else, right? So this is not just seen, we
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  discussed this in future episodes today.
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  Some and then I think it's Thursday or Wednesday but being
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  able to experience with someone else experiences in a way that
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  they're telling you how they're experiencing it, okay?
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  So this I have seen many people not do it, they don't know how
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  to embody because they'll immediately say, oh, I don't
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  like that idea or something. And I was thinking of an example
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  that I give, which is cultural where people have had these
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  reactions, and I'm like, you know, it's actually quite
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  interesting that you're not becoming aware that everybody
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  expresses their version differently and You this ill is
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  not really accurate and I'm thinking of close proximity.
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  And sometimes, you know, people getting too excited to see.
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  You know and example I have one of my friends, they get so
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  excited that they will start spitting, okay.
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  It's not pleasant of course, but to shame someone or to make them
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  feel bad. Or to you, it's not necessarily
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  accurate because it's cute. And at the same time it's funny
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  and It's human and it's a showing of affection that is of
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  a person. So the idea of emotional
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  expression is different based on culture and being able to accept
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  that people can be closer for me.
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  I'm part Neapolitan, Italian and so we're very close.
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  So I am used to dealing with what is a different type of
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  wanting to share affection and I embrace a heart that is
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  passionate. So to me proximity is the most
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  Raising of things, here's where I'm a mailing Heritage, being
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  able to be loving and soft and gooey and that's safe.
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  That's normal. That's not you, it's not.
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  Oh my god, get away from me. But when you learn enough about
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  why the rigidity happens you learn.
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  In fact, the attachment categories, it says it all.
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  And one of the findings, I forget, which one of my courses,
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  it was in. They talked about How at the
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  beginning of attachment category and or just attachment research?
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  There's two bodies, a group of them actually thought that the
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  avoidant attachment was a healthy attachment.
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  Instead, the avoidant attachment is a person who's disconnected
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  from their self there there, there's an armor because there
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  was not enough hugging and skin contact to activate that ventral
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  vagal. And the infant has not been met
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  and Off in that contingent communication.
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  So there is an absence, a complete absence of emotional
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  and being able to even be vulnerable.
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  So there is a wiring, in fact, that creates frustration longing
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  suffering, and even fear that remains stored until the person
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  is able to move into. Okay, wait a minute, it's okay.
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  And have people essentially that walk them through it without
• 19:50
  making it into 20, you know, you're not ever hear or not
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  there which you know, again, A lot of people are not actually
• 19:59
  emotionally or in their own mindset independent, they need
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  each other. That's the biggest difference of
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  5. DC person is not going to be a
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  person who needs you. They enjoy you.
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  And so we build relationships. No strings attached.
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  And therefore we actually do understand seeing in the absence
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  of needing us to be seen. And when it comes to
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  codependency will see spotted a mile away, and we won't be
• 20:29
  somebody who actually allows it to happen, but we won't shame it
• 20:32
  either. There are many areas that the
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  person who is in a 5D body type mind type will automatically
• 20:39
  know because they're people who expand consciously speaking.
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  So we know how to create independent safe relationships
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  and when people get into their non secure attachment, or
• 20:50
  disorganized attachment when Has modalities even in temperatures
• 20:54
  of secure attachment individuals, who will start
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  expressing their own ideas in a way that is unnecessary will
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  know how to handle it, because there's no shame in somebody
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  again, reacting to what is a cultural difference?
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  It's something natural for those of us who have been exposed to
• 21:11
  different cultures, and who have a differentiate itself?
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  What does that mean? It means my thoughts and
• 21:16
  feelings are not affected because you go, you, I'm going
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  to think, okay, you obviously are A different background which
• 21:23
  is great and dandy so my and thumbs up.
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  Yeah we got to have an exchange. It's called expanding the
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  horizons of what relationships can be and when love is all you
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  see and shaming understand and you try to help those who want
• 21:38
  to move out of it to get out of it, it's called you Manatee
• 21:41
  becoming more Humane. And for today that is all I have
• 21:46
  ran out of time. We talked about a little bit of
• 21:49
  this little bit of that you can tune into the episodes.
• 21:51
  There's two or three of them on and I will see you again soon.
• 21:55
  Have a great day.