Latest / Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce / 127. Mother's Day Special: Overcoming Divorce and Finding Strength in the Midst of Change

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127. Mother's Day Special: Overcoming Divorce and Finding Strength in the Midst of Change · Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce

• 0:49
  Speaker 1: Hi love.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: One of the things that made the greatest difference on painful holidays during my post-divorce era was support system right A community of people that believed in me and were rooting for me and who I could just like pop over and get a hug or a word of encouragement or you name it.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: And so that is what today's episode is all about Seven strangers to you, but seven people who have made a profound impact on either my life or producer's joyous life, who want to speak into you on today Mother's Day.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Hi love.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Dear Divorce Diary, the podcast helping divorcees go beyond talk therapy to process your grief, find the healing you crave and build back your confidence.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, dawn Wiggins, a therapist, coach, integrative healer and divorcee.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: Join me for a fresh approach to healing grief and building your confidence after divorce.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: Feeling loved and feeling supported has a profound effect on our healing processes.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: It helps us feel safe enough to process our grief.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: It helps lower anxiety and relieve depression.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: Our grief.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: It helps lower anxiety and relieve depression.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Each one of the seven messages for you today has that intention in mind A beautiful story or gift or share given freely from the heart, to help you feel loved and supported.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: And if you listen to the end, you have a really good shot at having an improved vibrational state by the end, which means you will be well-positioned to attract more of the things that you desire right now, at this point in your journey.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: It's hard to believe that it was 2005 when I first found out that my what I thought was a wonderful husband was having an affair.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: What I thought was a wonderful husband was having an affair.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: I had two small children, six and nine years old at the time, and it completely devastated me.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: I was in love with this man and I guess I just thought we were going through a normal rocky time.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: It crushed me.
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: Rocky time, it crushed me.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: But the positive is that, through a lot of personal development and developing female relationships and friendships and going back to work which I had been a stay-at-home mom for like six years I finally went back to work and being a mother and a wife was not just my life anymore, it was also going back to work.
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: That was helpful.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: Anyways, through a lot of personal development and tons of growth, I reached my goal, and my goal was to raise two wonderful daughters, and they are wonderful.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: They are 26 and 29 now, with both families of their own, and they frequently tell me what a wonderful mother and mentor I have been.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: And gosh, I'm trying not to cry because that meant the most to me that, in the depth of my despair, I was able to be the person that they needed and that I always prayed I would be, which was a great mother.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: After many, many years of dating, I have recently met a wonderful, wonderful man, so wish me luck.
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: I hope it turns out well and if it does not, I know that I love my life and I'm a strong woman and I don't need a man to be a partner to have a wonderful and happy life.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: So I wish all of you on this Mother's Day the best of luck and best wishes, and just know you freaking got this.
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: I know it may feel like your life is in pieces.
• 5:22
  Speaker 3: Your world is changing in so many different facets.
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: Life is in pieces.
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: Your world is changing in so many different facets.
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: Maybe it's through your housing situation, financial stability, parenting strategy or even all of these things and more, but I pray that your spiritual life strengthens.
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: It may not be revealed to you now, but I do pray you gain insight to God's plan for you.
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: We often think we won't go through trials, but it's quite the contrary.
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: God tells us we will, but that he will guide us, lead us, strengthen us and love us through them.
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: So, no matter the reason for this new season of life, I pray you find your strength in God, that he lends you strength through his word until you feel strong enough to stand on your own, that you feel the unconditional love and mercy he gives to us all.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: I pray you have a community to lean on during this time to fill you with faith and love.
• 6:21
  Speaker 3: If you don't, I encourage you to seek one that can pour truth into you.
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: Let me leave you with this.
• 6:27
  Speaker 3: Consider it a great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance, and let endurance have its full effect so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: James 1 Versus two through four.
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: For all those going through the challenges and the complexities that come with a divorce.
• 6:56
  Speaker 4: Just happy Mother's Day.
• 6:57
  Speaker 4: Very simply, obviously it's not easy and sometimes probably just beyond words difficult.
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: But from what I see on my end as a therapist and doing this work for over 10 years, oftentimes it takes tremendous courage to make this type of change, especially when kids are involved.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: And, on the positive end of that, it can oftentimes be the thing that breaks a cycle that has been going on for generations and it can really be a change that has this massive positive ripple effect for your family, for your kids, for yourself.
• 7:35
  Speaker 4: So on this day, I hope that everybody can take just at least a moment to breathe and feel appreciated, know that you're not alone in this process and that the strength that it takes does not go unnoticed.
• 7:47
  Speaker 4: So happy Mother's Day, filled with, hopefully, some smiles and hugs from your kids and your loved ones.
• 7:57
  Speaker 5: Dear one.
• 7:58
  Speaker 5: My name is Ivana and I would like to leave a heartful message for you.
• 8:04
  Speaker 5: Whether you are a mother or not, what I wish for you on this Mother's Day is to feel and embody the qualities of the ideal mother.
• 8:16
  Speaker 5: I wish for you to feel safe safe to feel your own feelings and create safety for others you care about.
• 8:29
  Speaker 5: I wish you to protect yourself, have boundaries and protect others you care about.
• 8:41
  Speaker 5: I wish for you to have a soothing voice towards yourself and comfort others that you love.
• 8:52
  Speaker 5: I wish for you to support and encourage yourself on this journey and have encouraging, supportive relationships in your own life.
• 9:06
  Speaker 5: I wish you to be attuned to your needs and the needs of people you love.
• 9:14
  Speaker 5: I appreciate you for all your efforts you put into your healing and I appreciate you for cultivating the mother's heart.
• 9:27
  Speaker 5: Whether you are the mother or not, your mother's qualities will always make a difference for your life and will benefit others.
• 9:44
  Speaker 6: I've raised four children through two divorces and this is what I learned to help me through some of the tough times.
• 9:51
  Speaker 6: Mother's Day a day for our children and families to show their appreciation for the love and care they received from their mother.
• 10:01
  Speaker 6: It's not about flowers and chocolate, candy and cards, and your ex-husband may or may not honor you as the mother of his children.
• 10:15
  Speaker 6: This gives you an opportunity to demonstrate two important things to your child or children.
• 10:23
  Speaker 6: First, you are worthy of love and respect as their mother.
• 10:31
  Speaker 6: Divorce does not change that.
• 10:34
  Speaker 6: Second, you teach your children how important it is for them to love themselves and model how they self-care for them.
• 10:45
  Speaker 6: Both lessons will serve your children and you well over the years.
• 10:52
  Speaker 6: Mother's Day, Keep it simple.
• 10:57
  Speaker 6: Fill it with love.
• 11:05
  Speaker 7: Happy Mother's Day.
• 11:06
  Speaker 7: I just wanted to say happy Mother's Day to all of the beautiful mothers out there and to share a memory that I always reflect on every Mother's Day.
• 11:11
  Speaker 7: My daughter had a very eventful birth, and so two days after she was born, we were excited to get the call that we could actually hold her in the NICU for the first time.
• 11:20
  Speaker 7: It was midnight, it was quiet and dark, the machines were beeping like crazy and her dad was holding her for the very first time.
• 11:28
  Speaker 7: He said something that made me laugh and in that moment she turned her little head so fast to look up into my eyes.
• 11:35
  Speaker 7: It was like electric in the universe through my body.
• 11:38
  Speaker 7: In that moment I knew who I was, who I needed to be, who she needed me to be.
• 11:45
  Speaker 7: I remember reflecting on that several times over the years as a course of strength, that this child loves me unconditionally and it's the most selfless love that I've ever experienced in my life.
• 11:55
  Speaker 7: I have sacrificed for her, I have done countless things to protect her, and it has given me my life back.
• 12:03
  Speaker 7: She gives me the strength every day to live my life authentically, with intention, and be the truest form of myself.
• 12:10
  Speaker 7: I am so thankful to be a mother.
• 12:12
  Speaker 7: Happy Mother's Day, and I hope that you enjoy your journey as a mom.
• 12:22
  Speaker 8: Happy Mother's Day.
• 12:23
  Speaker 8: I've been a mom for 27 years and this day has been filled with great joys as well as some pretty big disappointments.
• 12:30
  Speaker 8: For me, my hardest Mother's Day when my kids were growing up was when I only had one child at home and no one even really acknowledged that it should have been a special day.
• 12:41
  Speaker 8: It was sad.
• 12:42
  Speaker 8: I wish that I could tell my 40-year-old self that Mother's Day was not necessarily about my kids seeing me, but about God seeing me.
• 12:52
  Speaker 8: In the Bible there's a story about a woman named Hagar who had been sent away from her home with her young son.
• 12:58
  Speaker 8: She was lonely and afraid and God saw her and her son and provided for them what they needed to survive.
• 13:05
  Speaker 8: God saw her and she called him El Roy, the God who sees me.
• 13:13
  Speaker 8: Know that you are seen and loved on Mother's Day.
• 13:18
  Speaker 8: So think about how can you live in that reality?
• 13:22
  Speaker 8: Is there a way that you can see yourself on Mother's Day and do something just for you that honors your own likes or desires or needs?
• 13:31
  Speaker 8: Know that you are seen and loved, sweet mom, and that you are doing a big and important job raising your babies.
• 13:39
  Speaker 8: Happy Mother's Day.
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: If today's episode made a difference in your life, I strongly encourage you to share it with someone with whom it could make a difference for as well.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: Thinking of you today and always peace, dear Divorce Diary is a podcast by my coach, john.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: You can find more at mycoachdawncom.