Latest / Everyone's A Critic / A Cinderella Story w/ Olga Koch

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A Cinderella Story w/ Olga Koch · Everyone's A Critic

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome to everyone's critics.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_03: The show where a guest picks a movie rated below 40% on Rotten Tomatoes and tells us why critics got it wrong.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_03: I'm your host, Yannis Cove, a formerly pretentious film school student.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_03: Ten years later sees the error of his ways.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_03: My guest today is comedian, actor, fighter, overcock.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, thank you so much for having me.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_03: Thanks for being on.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_03: How are you doing?
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_03: I'm doing alright.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: I might I've like changed my stock answer.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: Um like before it would be alright, but now in quarantine.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: Am I allowed to refer to the quarantine?
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_03: You are.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, cool.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Because some podcasts are like, we never want people to know that this was recorded in quarantine.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_03: Um no, this is all being like very open.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: Uh in lockdown, my my stock answer is trying my best.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_03: I think that's a good one.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: How about you?
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I think I think the same answer, trying my best.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_03: So you came on today to talk about the movie uh a Cinderella story.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: If that was like if I if there a perfect podcast ever existed, it would just be me coming on to different podcasts talking about a Cinderella story.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, so what's what's your history with the movie then?
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so basically I can talk about this like from maybe like a kind of unfunny, more overintellectualizing angle.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm sure that there is like a name for this in in cinema and like maybe in like film company lingo, like production company lingo.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know what those terms are, but in the early 2000s, there was a huge influx of teen movies, and I would put them in two camps.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: One of them were like PG 13 ones, let's say, and I would say that the PG 13 ones all almost skewing PG where like sex wasn't even on the table.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then there was like the R-rated ones or the R-rated ones slash PG 13 ones where like sex was at least heavily implied if like not constantly talked about.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: So I would say like the sex one would be like the the poster boy for that would be like American Pie, where they're all just talking about fucking.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: Or and then like the chaste one would be, I don't know, something like Freaky Friday, where it was like they wouldn't even like hint at the fact that like sex is a thing.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it's really interesting how we're all like constantly thinking about the fact that like, oh, they're all teen movies, but they're so distinct in my head.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: Like, oh, is that the one where they would talk about sex or not?
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: So in Mean Girls, they kind of talked about sex.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: In She's the Man, I don't think they really talked about sex at all.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: So it was it it I mean, maybe like very, very uh I'm sorry, you didn't expect me to be this detailed, but do it, do it, go for it, go for it.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um yeah, so basically I think I I remember even as a kid and as a teenager having that distinction and being very aware of this distinction.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that like the cheesiest movies and from which I get like a perverse enjoyment are the ones that are like very visibly chaste.
• 3:13
  unknown: Yeah.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I think a Cinderella story is one of those films where it's like it's so squeaky clean, it's almost unbelievable.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I I have the I it's funny you say that because I have the exact same uh thought going into this movie as like because that's the same thing that I see with these it's just like those early 2000s movies where it's it is the split between uh raunchy and cl super clean.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_03: And this is kind of like the height of that, I guess.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I think a part of it, like, apart when Superbad came out, I think a part of our shock and obsession with it as a society was the fact that it was like it was the most realistic of them all.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't like it wasn't so overly horny that it was unbelievable, like an American pie.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: No, your whole fucking friend group did not lose their virginities on the same night.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: But also it wasn't so chaste that it's like we're best friend and we never talk about born.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I think it like nailed the real the reality of like high school horniness so well that all of us were just like, holy shit, super bad is epic.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: But Cinderella's story came before Superbad, and it it is just like as chaste as they come, Disney Channel original, squeaky squeaky clean, Christian, good Christian girl, like that type shit.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just so fun, like it's funny because of that.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_03: So I had this like um it's funny you say Disney Channel original, because I there's two things about this.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_03: I th I've for some reason I had in my head that it was dis uh like a Disney movie.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_03: Um it's not.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: Is it not?
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: Are you serious?
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_03: So it's not on Disney Plus at least, so I don't think it's Disney I don't think it's Disney.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: The other thing is true, because it's on Netflix and there's no Disney movies.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's on Netflix.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: And the other thing is, I um I can I don't know why I didn't put this together, but I um I did like some work experience at Warner Brothers when I was like 15 or something for like a week and Flex, love it, love it.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_03: It's it only to clarify this.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_03: I got sent to um I got sent to a press screening for for this movie.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, why didn't you open with this?
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: Why am I fucking talking?
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: You should be giving lectures on this.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_03: However, I was the only person in the screening.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_03: No one else came.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody came to review this movie, and I was just sitting there on my own in a giant screening.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, that's amazing.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: That's my favorite story of all time.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_03: So the the thing is, like, I for some reason I I thought it was Disney, but then I didn't put together that I'd seen it at Warner Bros.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, interesting.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: So this is Warner Brothers.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like the same way that people are like, oh my god, Anastasia's a Disney movie.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: Anastasia is not a Disney movie.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: There is not a Russian Disney princess, and I take that to heart.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah, that's that's more important to you, I guess.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like that's a really important thing to you.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_03: That's not something I've ever, yeah.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_03: I've I don't think I've ever seen Anastasia.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, it's epic.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: Meg Ryan, John Cusack, Rasputin.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: Come on.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_03: Meg Ryan and John Cusack.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_03: That's a weird casting for a uh for I was gonna say Disney movie, it's not Disney.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's not Disney, but also it was like ages ago.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: It was like so long ago that they were like in their 30s.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's fine.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_03: Who made it?
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I want to say 20th Century Fox, but I remember that it's like four yeah, I remember being like Russia's the center of the universe because Anastasia uh came out.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_03: Wait, were you in uh Russia at the time when it came out?
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it was huge.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: We were like, holy fuck.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: We've got we've got a cartoon about us.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um but I'm not here to talk about Anastasia, I'm here to talk about Cinderella's.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_03: Let's talk about a Cinderella story.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_03: Uh when did you first see it?
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_03: Did you see it when it first came out?
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: I believe I saw it when it first came out.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: I also kind of love the idea that this was Hilary Duff had such a chaste image, and I keep reusing the word chaste, like almost like sanitized image in the media, that a Cinderella story was like her foray into like risque.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like it was her foray into like I'm an adult now.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: And like when Liz Lindsay Lohan at the same time was like doing coke off of like people's dicks, Hilary Duff was like being adult by being in a movie where she kissed on the lips, like it was it was huge.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_03: So it's funny because like um I I I remember thinking at the time, I was yes, I was 15 when this came out, and I remember being like, oh, Hilary Duff is is the good one, and Lindsay Lohan is the is the one that's gonna go is the one that's gonna go uh crazy.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I wouldn't be surprised.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: I think they came out at the same time, and like Oh my god, that's fascinating.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so it's I think Mean Girls came out just before this, like a couple of months or something, thinking about it.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, so they were like, yeah, they l really are like the angel and devil on each of our shoulders, aren't they?
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_03: But Mean Girls is uh Mean Girls is a far better movie than this, in my opinion.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, yes, it is more well written, it is more quoted, it's more structured, sure.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: But is that what you're looking for a movie?
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: A good script, good acting?
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like, is that what we're looking for yet?
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_03: No, no, I'm looking for a uh an updated remake of a of a Cinderella movie, a fairy tale.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, can we just address the elephant in the room and the fact that like the whole premise of the film hinges on the fact that this boy doesn't recognize her because she has the tiniest little eye mask on.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_03: That is like one of the biggest issues.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: It is, I mean, I what it's the whole the whole movie.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: He sees her that same night.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: He sees her as a waitress, full, fully, like they face each other and chat earlier.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: And what about like two hours later, an hour later, he sees her and she has like the tiniest little like sliver of an eye mask, and he's like, Who the fuck are you?
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_03: There's no way to not recognize her.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_03: It's so obviously her.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: There is um in in that golden age of teen movies, I'd say that there were like leaps of faith we were all meant to take.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: And there was I don't remember what the name of the movie was, but there was a Disney Channel original movie in which there were two girls who played basketball and they were meant to be twins.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm assuming they couldn't eat like couldn't find, I don't know, two female tall twins who could play basketball.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_00: So they just literally hired two tall blonde actresses, but they were like completely different looking.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: And the whole movie was like, let's switch places, no one will know.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_00: And like the the whole audience was meant to be like, yeah, they're really taken as everyone for a ride.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: And it was like they were two completely different people.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_03: So they didn't even go the Lindsay Lohan route of like the free of uh parent trap of just like.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: No, they couldn't parent trap.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's too high budget, Yannis.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: Come on, you know, Disney Channels doesn't have that kind of money.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: Or they couldn't f hire twins like Mary Kate and Ashley.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: They literally just hired two different people, and up top they were like, BT dubs, those are twins.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, keep watching.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um and so this this is, I think, that level of kind of like who the fuck do you think the audience is?
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: She's literally wearing an eye mask.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_03: But there's also uh what else is there?
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_03: There's there's but they do it with uh the best friend as well, where he's just wearing he has like a mustache, I think.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, Zoro when he's Zoro, right?
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he doesn't have anything that makes him look different.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's incredible.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_03: It's so good.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_03: So how many times do you think you've seen it?
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: I pr probably ten, but I think it it was it's one of those things where I think it came out around 2004.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_00: 2004 was like prime time for like me at my age to be obsessive.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like I remember I would watch like I would finish watching a movie and then start watching it like again, again and again and again.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: So I think if I did watch it, I watched it mostly back then around the time when it came out.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so you're like prime age for it then as well.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I think there's like things that you like go and get informed on and then come back to the movie with like a new like zeal.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_00: I would say, like, oh, then I saw Chad Michael Murray on One Tree Hill, got obsessed with One Tree Hill, came back to a Cinderella story, saw it with new eyes because it was Chad Michael Murray of One Tree Hill Fell fame.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: Or you see Jennifer Coolidge in Legally Blonde, and you're like, you know where else Jennifer Coolidge was?
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_00: A Cinderella's story.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: And so you keep coming back to it, and it just shines in a new light every single time.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, because uh Chad Michael Murray was at the height of his career at this point.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: I mean he cleaned up.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: He absolutely cleaned up, didn't he?
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, he definitely cleaned up.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_03: One we know.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_03: Freaky Friday.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_03: Freaky Friday.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_03: Also, another thing here was in Lindsay Lohan film.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: He's he's playing both teams, baby.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_03: Mmm.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_03: Disney.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_03: Freaky Friday's Disney?
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it is.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_00: Wait, I'm Freaky Friday is Disney.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: Freaky Friday is squeaky, squeaky clean.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: But then it came out with an incredible song.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: Uh which is now going viral on TikTok, which is like full circle for everyone.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's a great song.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: But I would say Um I'm not gonna sing it for copyright reasons.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: Uh also I can't sing.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: But um, my one of my favorite bits of a Cinderella story is, and this is like perfect early 2000s, like starlit vehicle.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: Uh Hilary Duff is very much on the soundtrack of the movie that she's starring in.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_03: Very much so.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: I think the opening song is so yesterday, I'm pretty sure.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um I don't think it is.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's it's um I because I I would have written that down definitely if it was.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_03: Um because I was trying to.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's I know that she's on the soundtrack for sure.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, she's on the soundtrack multiple times.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_03: It's not songs that I knew, but it's songs that like it's definitely clearly her.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um because there is a scene at the end, uh, which I remember so just to skip right ahead to the end, uh when they are in the rain, um and everything.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_03: I I had this memory, and I don't know if it's um something that's I've just made up in my head over time, or if it's something that happened and they changed it, uh, from the screening.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_03: But I remember Come Clean playing at that point.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_03: Does it not?
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_03: It doesn't.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_00: Let the rain come clean and watch none.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_00: Let it wash.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: It's oh god, she was good.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: Wait, but that's such a perfect song to play at that moment.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: How did they take it out?
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_03: I thought it was there.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_03: I don't remember I don't remember if it's something that I put made up in my head or if it actually was in there and they changed it for copyright reasons.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_03: But they changed it to some other Hillary Duff song.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_03: Interesting.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_03: It's not one that I knew because I made a note of it at the end.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: Um I just looked up the uh Cinderella's story quotes on rottentomatoes.com because I didn't want to get it wrong.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um, first of all, we need to point out the classic You Need a Wax.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: Excuse me, I mean the car.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: Ooh!
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: I mean that's that's the ri the most risque that movie went, didn't it?
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_03: It's it's very yeah, it's so clean.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: Uh but okay, do we remember the quote?
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: Because waiting for you is like waiting for the rain in this drought.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: Useless and disappointing.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh!
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_01: And then a kiss in the rain.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_03: That's that I remember that from from back then.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_03: That's the one thing I really clearly remember because it's so funny.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: She fucking owned him, man.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_03: It's a great quote.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_03: Um let's talk about the let's let's go over the plot itself.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_03: Let's uh so let me give a brief uh explanation.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_03: So it's it's Cinderella, so but modern day.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_03: It's uh she has to live with her evil stepmother because her dad dies in an earthquake, which is awful.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yep, yep.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: And that was like a really graphic earthquake scene just right off the top.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it opens with that.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_03: And but then also like her dad.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_03: For some reason, her dad marries this guy, uh, married marries this woman, and we never know why he's married her, what he sees in her.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um, excuse me, it's Jennifer Fucking Coolidge.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_03: It's Jennifer Coolidge, but it's it's the worst version of her.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_00: True.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: And she has these daughters.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: One of them was then in Californication, remember?
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_03: I don't.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_03: So I've never seen it.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_00: I saw so much obscure early 2000s media, my brain is fried.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_03: I know the show, I've never seen it.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you're not missing out on much.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_03: It's um wait, which one of them?
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_03: Because they're also they're twins and they look nothing alike.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_03: Are they meant to be twins?
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_03: They are.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_00: Are you serious?
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they talk about being born one minute apart.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, Jesus Christ.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, well.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_03: If we really want to talk about twins.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: Oh god, another twin another twin crime.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_03: Just make them sisters.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_03: They don't need to be twins.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: They don't need to be twins.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: And then the Princeton thing?
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, I interrupted you.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, yeah, no, it's fine.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_03: The Princeton thing, yeah.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_03: The only way uh that that's how you uh find your Prince, you go to Princeton.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: I mean the whole the whole premise, I mean just like, is the dad trying to trick his daughter into getting a good education by way of promising her that she would find a husband?
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_03: I I guess.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_03: There's that, but then there's also like um So there's the whole thing with Chad Michael Murray and his dad, and wanting to go off and do his own thing.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_03: I feel like she all she's doing is following her dad's wishes now.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, that's so true.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're so right.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_00: You're so right.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_00: Also, okay, there is this whole like trope.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, well let's just say that like in any teen movie, in any children's movie, systematically the kids are smarter than the adults.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_00: Is that correct?
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: Like that's like you can't have a children's movie in which the kids aren't like significantly more intelligent than any adult you see on screen.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_00: They're never like I'm dumb, uh as kids usually are.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: And so there is this trope.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_00: I like I'm it's really bothering me because I can't remember the other examples of this, but I know for a fact there are.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_00: I think they're more in teen dramas like Riverdale-esque type stuff.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_00: But the idea that the kid wants to rebel, but the rebellion isn't like I'm running away from home and dishing school.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_00: The rebellion is like I'm going to a better school.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_03: Like it's yeah, it's every teen movie.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_03: Every teen movie.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, fuck you, dad.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna go to this mid-level university, I'm gonna go to an Ivy League university.
• 18:31
  unknown: Owned!
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: Fucking owned.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not gonna work for you, I'm not gonna take over your business every single time.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_03: It's always I'm not gonna take over your business, I'm going to this school, and I'm gonna be a writer every time.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, it's it's so tired.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_03: It's so clearly the screenwriter putting it in there.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, the right the writer whose dad is like crying over their freaking like car mechanic shop that they can't give to their son.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like every writer in Hollywood is a son of a car mechanic that's who's currently crying.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_03: That's amazing.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_03: That'd be so funny if that's true.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: Uh yeah, and then like everyone's like, you know that thing when your dad is that is really sad that you haven't taken his mechanic shop over, and everyone's like, no.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: That thing, you know that thing.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's it always happens.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_03: Um there's also um he Yeah, he wants to take over the he wants to go and become a writer.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_03: She wants to just go to Princeton.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think it's ever clear why.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_03: Other than like, because to find the prince, I guess.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um But they meet in the press, they meet in the Princeton uh chat room.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_03: And that's how they first meet, but uh but we don't see it, we just see them like mid-conversation, like down the line where they've been talking for months, I guess.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um in a Princeton So that read first of all, that really dates it.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_03: They're in a Princeton chatroom.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_00: They're in a chat room.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_03: And they have like no interest in using their phones for the most part, because she loses her phone for a long time and has no interest in getting it back.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's really interesting.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_00: That's really, really interesting.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, um this reminds me of just a a a friend of a friend who met her like boyfriend that she dated for two years in a follow-up boy forum, and that makes me so happy.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: And it which makes me like think that meeting someone in a in a specific specifically themed chat room or forum is like the way to meet your perfect half because it could be so targeted.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like in a subreddit so specific, it's only the two of you there.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what if we what if we write a romantic comedy in which like you're single, let's say you're single.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know if you are, I don't want to ask you on on records, okay, cool.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_00: I don't So imagine Yanis, and you're like, How do I find my perfect woman?
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_00: And the way that you or man or non-binary person, I don't want to assume, sorry, that was like really heteronormative of me, and I am horrified by myself, with myself.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: So you're like, I want to find my perfect person, and so you create a subreddit that's like just like you.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you like, I don't know, like, you like when it's 5 p.m.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: and the eggs are just undercooked, whatever.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: So you create this super, super specific subreddit for yourself, and you're like, if that person exists, they'll find me.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then maybe like three years later you forgot about the subreddit, and then someone like posts to it, and you're like, fuck, and like that's your it's like it's like um you've got mail, but it's like modern day modern day.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just saying you can have that.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I'll take it.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm gonna use it.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_03: I'm also gonna use it from real life.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_00: The subreddit is the red pill.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_03: Like you say how Specific it was just made me think of that rule 34, I think it is, where you know that.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_03: Wait, what is that?
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_03: It's where if um if uh someone has a uh a fetish for something, it exists somewhere on the internet.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, definitely.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's so anything it could be absolutely anything that you will find it on the internet as a fetish for I'll tell you two more things.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_00: First of all, I'd like to say that I've had friends who have and I what do you mean friends?
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: I think all of us have like acquired fetishes from seeing them.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: So they will see it and be like, I didn't know it was a thing, but now that I see it, isn't is they've got they they Yeah they've got a good idea.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: They've got a good thing going.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_00: Uh and then the second thing I wanted to say is what does the 34 mean in rule 34?
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_03: I couldn't tell you.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_03: That I I'm not even sure I'm getting it completely correct, but I think it's something it might it might be a different number even.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's 34.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: Very interesting.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's just like pick a random number, that's what it is.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_03: It's just like rule 34 of the internet.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: Interesting.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: Oh gotta gotta very, very cool.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_03: So it's yeah.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_03: Anyway, back to this wholesome family-friendly thing.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_03: Uh so yeah, so she goes to live she live ends up Fiona Jennifer Coolidge ends up taking over uh looking after she takes over the diner that the dad owns, um looks after Hilary Duff, but Hilary Duff has to work for her, basically, in order to live.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yes Um because there's no will and that's why she has to live with her.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_03: Um and then it so it cuts to eight years later, and she's working, uh she's like Jennifer Coolidge is in is fully enjoying her riches.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_03: I don't get how she's so rich I don't get how the dad was so rich from owning a diner.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's a really good point as well.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_03: He is very rich.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_00: But the diner is only successful because they have this like amazing um uh waitress played by Regina King, who's like the fairy goddess.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_03: Oscar winner Regina King.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, the one savior of this fucking movie.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_03: Oh but she I feel like she played these roles for so long.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: Was it Regina King?
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: Am I making this up where Regina King was also in Miscan Geniality?
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_03: She was.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, she is a delight, isn't she?
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, she's like she goes in and she's like, I'm here to save this fucking sinking ship.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_03: And she's in Legally Blonde 2.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_03: These are like the roles she ended up she played for so long.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_00: She was playing the the r like Regina King type.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_03: Like it's interesting because she started off in like Boys in the Hood.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: And then she just crossed over into like being the one black woman who's like keeping all of these white women's lives together.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: And then she was in Beale Street if Beale Street could talk, right?
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_03: She's amazing in and I'm just looking up.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: She was in Jerry Maguire as well.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, as uh uh she's uh Cuba Gooding Jr.'s wife.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: I have not seen that film.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: Uh okay.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_03: It's it's both miscongenialities.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_00: Cinderella's story.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: Mm-hmm.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: Have I seen any of these?
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_00: Ray.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, she literally she literally went Cinderella story, Ray Miscongeniality 2.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_00: So it's just like cash passion cash.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: Who was it?
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: I think it was um Glenn Close.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_00: Glenn Close was in Guardians of the Galaxy, and in an interview, she literally said she was like, I did two indies that I really wanted to do, but then I needed some cash, so I did Guardians of the Galaxy, and I love that answer.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_03: I I saw something the other day that said um it was talking about Ben Affleck, and he he said that he did uh they they asked him why he did the movie paycheck, and he goes, It was in the title.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_00: Hey the in the title, Batman.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_00: Did you ever see Ben Affleck's Batman?
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: How was that?
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_03: Not good.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_03: I mean he's fine.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_03: He did the voice.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_03: He's fine, but I don't know.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_03: He's not a great he's not the most amazing Batman.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_00: Well now they're having uh Robert Pattinson, aren't they?
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_03: I'm excited because that's gonna be very different.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um I I can't I can't tell you that I'll watch it.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: I can't like I can't.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_03: Are you a fan of Batman Otherwise?
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_00: Eh, I don't think it's my favorite.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_00: Uh I don't think it's my favorite superhero.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_00: I will say, like, we had emo Spider-Man.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much to Toby Maguire.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm ready for fuckboy Batman with Robert Patson.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_03: I hope he plays it like in uh what's that recent the King thing that he did recently?
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um god, I never saw it, but I saw like clips of him playing some ridiculous king, and I and he he was so over the top, and I hope he plays it that way.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_03: Um people are gonna be shouting it.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: I don't can't remember.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so sorry, I have no idea what that is.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, ask me about teen movies starring an early naughty as a starlets, and I'll fucking tell you.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so My expertise is deep but limited.
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_03: Let's get back to the movie then.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_03: Please.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he uh so she serves Han like she has to keep serving Jennifer Coolidge all of the uh everything basically everything.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_03: She works she gets up very early in the morning to feed Jennifer Coolidge salmon from Norwegian.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's a whole thing.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_00: The salmon.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_00: The salmon is huge.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it it's was that a thing at the time that it was like Norwegian salmon?
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_03: Was that a big thing?
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: I don't remember that being I wonder if that's like I wanna say, is that like when sushi got uh I don't know, like when sushi got like widely commodified in America, like it when it was started being available at like gas stations and 7-Elevens and like stopped being a fancy food?
• 28:21
  SPEAKER_00: Because I remember that shift.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: I remember that shift in Russia specifically when we like just got Japanese restaurants and it was like oh wait to dine out and then boop and then you could buy it in every supermarket.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I wonder if that was the cusp.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_03: When was that the same time in Russia?
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_00: I think a little bit later.
• 28:40
  unknown: Right.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm maybe completely I I genuinely don't know the history of Japanese cuisine in America.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: No, I I'm not sure.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_00: But Benny Hana was around in the 90s, so I don't know.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_03: It's just a with it's just very specific Norwegian salmon and it keeps coming up again and again.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_00: Is that okay?
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_00: We've established this is not a Disney film, but I think that there's a Disney comedy sensibility that is Norwegian salmon is is one of those things.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_03: It's it's very Disney in its um it feels so Disney, and that's I think that's why everyone thinks it is, I guess.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_00: I Because like the comedy sensibility is like it has to be absolutely squeaky clean.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_00: Again, we've established, right?
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then it could be like it's um I think there's like humor and specificity, right?
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like when you're like if it's specific, it is funny.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_00: Also, this was we need uh lest we forget, this was the height of random.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, that's so random.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_00: And like, what's more random than Norwegian salmon?
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_00: And then again, uh the Disney comedy sensibility of let's just repeat it until it's funny, until it's a running gag.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_00: Um Yeah.
• 29:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, there's there's that, and then it's the there's the the two twin sisters.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_03: Uh they are uh so their whole their whole thing is they um are training for Yeah, so their whole thing is they're synchronized they're like practicing synchronized swimming.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_03: It comes up like time and time again, but it's never like it's never finished, it just happens, it's just a thing.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um But it's it opens with that and one of them farts and says she has a spastic colon.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_03: Oh wow.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_00: I mean again, farts are like the the absolute limit to which they could push this film.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_03: Such weird phrasing.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_03: And I think it's just like that's that's it's a lot.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_03: It's a lot.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_03: That's that's dis that's full Disney comedy.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um but then they uh so then they uh Hillary Duff tries to go to she has to go to work in the diner.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_03: Uh there's like we find out that there's a drought going on.
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_03: Um and it's been uh because there's like been no rain for however long, which is a thing, I guess, in in California.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_03: Um then I I wrote down that there's this is when Oscar winner Oscar winning actress Regina King shows up and she's working in the she works in the diner, she's like running the diner essentially.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um I guess she's the manager of it.
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_03: Isn't that I guess she's the manager, isn't she?
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_00: Well I mean I think she's like head waitress for sure, and then she constantly like references the fact that if she's fired, no one would come to the to the diner because she's literally the only human there who is sufferable.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_03: It's yeah, well, no, everyone in there is is fine except for Jennifer Coolidge and her kids.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, yes, they're fine, but also like I'm sorry, but the way that Hillary Duff treats the girl, the Chad Michael Murray's ex when she like wants something sugar-free, and she's like, the only thing that we have that's sugar-free is water.
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_00: Like, that's bad service.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just bad service.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna throw that out there.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like, they might be nice people and have good grades and get into Princeton, but I'm not not about to tell you that that was like a restaurant with fantastic TripAdvisor reviews.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_03: But it also might be true because it's a diner.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, maybe.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_00: So Regina King is the only good thing about this diner.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 32:26
  SPEAKER_03: Uh and then we find then we meet um so who else is in the in the diner?
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_03: There's like um there's the chef who carry walks around carrying giant salmon a lot.
• 32:39
  unknown: Yeah.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_00: Which is like, again, as a trip advisor reviewer, like the salmon's great, but anything else, anything at all.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_03: Don't carry it through the diner as well.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_03: And then we meet um her best friend who comes out in his offensive uh hip-hop gear.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_03: Fully offensive.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_03: And this this was also like very this was a big thing of like white kids dressing up this way.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_03: Um back at the in movies.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_03: This was a big thing of like having them dress exactly like that.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_03: Um because I remember it in Soul Plane specifically, they had a white kid who looked like this guy and he dressed like that as well.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um very weird.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_00: And it was yeah, it was definitely like a a running, like a trope that they would have.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_03: Luckily, he says he's being I I don't know how much it's defensive, but he's a method actor, and that's why you learn he's dressing like that.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, no, no, no, sweetie.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_03: And he thinks that's what he has to dress like for that role, and she she sends him to go get changed again.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_03: Then we meet Shelby and Austin, who are the the popular couple, um, and it's every stereotype.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_00: I tell one thing out there about the best friend though, just real quick.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_00: Go for it.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_00: Refreshing.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_00: I might be lying because I did rewatch it not so recently, but it's refreshing to have a male best friend who doesn't have a crush on the main girl.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so glad that you said that as well because I I I'm so happy they didn't go that route.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because it's so it happens so often that you're just like, oh, he's like has a fucking unrequited love, doesn't he?
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, I remember the first time I saw it, and I was fully waiting.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_03: I was fully expecting something bad to happen with Austin and then her to end up with him at the end.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_03: That's what 'cause that's what you expect.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_00: Uh like in my favorite movie of all time, Tall Girl.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_00: Have you seen Tall Girl?
• 34:45
  SPEAKER_03: I haven't.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_03: I can't believe you said that's your favorite movie of all time.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: Janice, watch Tall Girl.
• 34:50
  SPEAKER_03: No, I'm not gonna be able to do that.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry, do you not believe in oppression?
• 34:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: Do you know what it's like to be tall and blonde?
• 35:02
  SPEAKER_03: Isn't she just six foot as well?
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, she's an objectively gorgeous tall woman, and the o the only thing people are like, how's the weather up there?
• 35:11
  SPEAKER_00: And she like cries to her dad about it.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's amazing.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_03: Do you actually like that movie?
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_00: Amazing.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's amazing in that, like, I can't believe they made this.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like the whole time you're watching this and you're like, and her best friend is a black woman, and the whole time she cries to her saying, you don't understand what oppression is.
• 35:29
  SPEAKER_00: It is the most self-unaware piece of cinema I've ever seen in my entire life.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_03: I might have to watch it.
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's you have to.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: You have to like for your podcast.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_03: Why didn't you why didn't you pick it?
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, because it wasn't on the list.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I realize that you said that we could do another thing, but I've just I'd say anyway you want.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I will now I've just remembered Tall Girl.
• 35:50
  SPEAKER_00: But also, I would it wouldn't be it'd be unfair for me to say that it's a bad movie because I genuinely think it's it's performance art.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_03: I will have you back on to do it.
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's commentary on how self-unaware white women are, and who's the most self-unaware white woman there is?
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_00: Moi.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think that's true.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_00: And that's because there was a Russian princess when I was growing up.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, so Shelby and Austin are like the the the it couple.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um they they're just every they're every stereotype you think of a teen movie.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_03: It's just it's very much um the she's all that couple.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_03: That's what it makes me think of.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_03: Because it's like he's kind of the nice, nicest sort of guy.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_03: He kind of but he's with the wor he's with the worst person you uh possible, at least to Hillary Duff.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: Um and then she treats everyone badly, he he's nice to everyone and his two best friends are like the worst people in the world.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_03: The biggest douches.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_00: So I will also throw out there that he's this like he's this incredible trope.
• 37:08
  SPEAKER_00: Austin, right?
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_00: Is that his name?
• 37:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_00: Uh the incredible trope of like cool just being tired.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like he's always frowning a bit.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_00: He's never high energy, he's never like excited about anything, because being excited or being earnestly sincerely into something is lame.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_00: Like you're a loser if you aren't ironic, right?
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_00: So the idea that he he's constantly like very slow moving, very like, do you have chronic fatigue syndrome or are you just popular?
• 37:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like, because it's definitely a trup to be like, oh, you know what's cool?
• 37:45
  SPEAKER_00: Cool is a guy who's re moving real slow.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_00: Do you know what I'm talking about?
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, absolutely.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_03: I don't feel like he does anything in this movie.
• 37:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_03: Other than play football, and apparently well, he seems to play it like everyone else.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_03: We don't see him do anything that amazing.
• 38:05
  SPEAKER_00: Um But it's like, yeah, it's a lot of like squinting and frowning and looking.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 38:10
  SPEAKER_03: But that's that's also Chad Michael Murray, I feel like.
• 38:13
  SPEAKER_03: That's him.
• 38:15
  SPEAKER_03: Um This is true.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's like, yeah, that's the character that he always plays in every film.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_03: Not that I've seen him in much.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_03: I've seen him in like this Freaky Friday, and I guess House of Wax, I want to say.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yep, classic, a true classic.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_00: Alicia Cuthbert, uh Paris Hilton.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_03: Paris Hilton at the height of her acting career.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, but do you remember that scene in House of Wax when like everyone's covered in wax in the house and then you could see the eyeballs moving?
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_03: I don't remember anything about that movie.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, and then I remember Madame Tusods had a House of Wax room as their like horror room, and I was too scared to go in because I was a tiny baby.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_00: Uh yes, but also d uh speaking of Chad Michael Murray, his whole acting style is tilt head down and then look from under your eyebrows up while squinting, and that's like that's happy, that's sad, that's all of it.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_03: It's but it's such a trope of again, like you're saying, it's such a trope of like the uh the unrequ the the the the boy that the girl pines over in any rom any rom-com from this time.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_03: Um Aaron Samuels in Mean Girls.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, you're so right.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_00: But I think Aaron Samuels, I agree, all that, but also he's just like genuinely nice.
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_00: But actually, Chad Michael Murray is nice too.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_00: He like tips her.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_03: So they're like low-he's nice, he tips her.
• 39:49
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_00: Uh I have a very low bar for men.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you very much.
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_03: Well, that's all it takes, Olga.
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um I have, I mean, I absolutely hate doing this because it's cringy, but I do have a bit about how like so much like I as a woman do so much projecting on men, and I feel like a lot of women do this.
• 40:08
  SPEAKER_00: And the thing being like, is he tall or is he hot?
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_00: Is one of them.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_00: And then is he smart or is he quiet?
• 40:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because the second a guy is quiet, you're just like, oh my god, what is he thinking about?
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_00: He's thinking about something so smart he can't even like put it into words because I'm so too stupid to understand.
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just like he could be just like counting sheep or like sleeping, but I'll just be like, Wow.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_03: It's just a guy passed out just because he's so tired.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, so he's just like sleeping with his eyes open.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_00: But um, but because I've watched all these teen movies in my head, I'm like, oh no, no, no.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_00: He's thinking about like the poetry he's gonna write on the Princeton chat room later.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's fucking poetry.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um poetry quotes, uh and he quotes uh Tennyson.
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_03: Isn't it Tennyson?
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_03: I think she says, and she's yeah, she he quotes Tennyson, he wants to be a writer, he quotes Tennyson, and she immediately recognizes it because she's smart as well.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, fucking Tennyson.
• 41:04
  SPEAKER_00: I also, yeah, I would I would love to do like a oh my god, Yanis.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe we could do this.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_00: Can we make a video or podcast or infographic that basically tracks the what are we equating intelligence to in this film?
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because I would say, like, I remember in the movie Disturbia starring Shia LaBeouf, thank you very much.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, there was like, he has professes this m monologue of love to this girl, and he's like, You read books, like actual books, not us weekly.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, she could have been reading Mind Comp.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_00: You can't just equate like reading books to intelligence.
• 41:44
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you have to check what the book is.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_00: Just reading books is nothing.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_00: She could be writing reading a fucking like, I don't know, washing machine manual.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I would love to see, like, okay, well, we're gonna take these movies where intelligence is reference and how is intelligence represented.
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_00: And the fact that in this movie, intelligence is represented by quoting Tennyson is fucking hilarious because the target demo of this film don't know who that is.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_02: It's also like, who just has a Tennyson quote they could just pull off, pull out their arms and just quote it?
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_00: Who's got a Tennyson quote ready to go?
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_00: I have questions for that person.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_03: He's clearly like if if someone quoted that to me in a chat room, I'd just be like, okay, they've just looked that up and posted it.
• 42:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's oh god, it's so funny.
• 42:31
  SPEAKER_00: Genuinely.
• 42:31
  SPEAKER_00: I would love to see.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like, is there a movie in which there's like I don't know, L.
• 42:35
  SPEAKER_00: Ron Hubbard is quoted for intelligence?
• 42:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like, he's got all these L.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_00: Ron Hubbard books.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_03: Probably um Battlefield Earth.
• 42:48
  SPEAKER_03: Or the Master.
• 42:49
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that actually that that's probably the most accurate one.
• 42:55
  SPEAKER_03: So he he's um he what his dad wants him to play USC football.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_03: Uh he wants him to get uh drafted for by USC, I guess, and then like go and play there.
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_03: Uh and then after he's done playing USC football, he doesn't want him to go and play in the NFL.
• 43:14
  SPEAKER_03: He what no, he wants him to manage his car wash.
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, yeah.
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_00: Um, first of all, tracks, all of that makes sense to me.
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, because you could be smart or you could play sports, and both cannot exist, Yanis.
• 43:27
  SPEAKER_03: Both can't exist, but you have to do one, for some reason you have to get really good and go to this university and play football, and then throw that away and go manage my car wash.
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_00: That sounds that makes a lot of sense.
• 43:41
  SPEAKER_00: That makes a lot of sense to me.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, sure.
• 43:44
  SPEAKER_03: I mean it doesn't.
• 43:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um I know.
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_00: I I I gang that.
• 43:50
  SPEAKER_00: Oh god.
• 43:51
  SPEAKER_03: Just like look at all this pressure.
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_03: The the dad is he's like tracked my whole life.
• 43:57
  SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, I would also like.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_00: Love to do a like a deep research into what your parents expect of you in a teen movie.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that would be fascinating.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm sure it's like constantly the same thing.
• 44:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sure it's always like going to There's always a car wash because obviously every teen movie is funded by big car wash in the pocket of big car wash.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_03: It's only so they can have like they always have some car they drive around.
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't have a car at this age.
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, American car culture, like that's the one thing I remember looking back and being like, why how can you drive a car?
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_00: And Mary Kate and Ashley even had, I think, a film called Sweet Sixteen, My Super Sweet, no, my Sweet Sixteen or Sweet Sixteen, where the whole premise was, oh, they have a car now.
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_00: Which again, what occasion didn't Mary Kate and Ashley have a film for?
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so I remember, yeah, as as a as a kid in Europe watching that stuff in America and being like, why are all these teenagers why do they have cars?
• 44:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I don't yeah, this is it's just like so uh that's one thing I never got with American culture because we don't that's not a thing here.
• 45:07
  SPEAKER_00: But that being said, I would choose drinking at 18 over driving a car at 16 any day of the week.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but I was also drinking at 16, so it's like, ooh!
• 45:17
  SPEAKER_00: We've got a badass.
• 45:19
  SPEAKER_03: We got a normal English person.
• 45:22
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, they're also they can only drink at 21.
• 45:26
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, they drink before that, but still.
• 45:29
  SPEAKER_03: And then I went to America and drunk before 21.
• 45:33
  SPEAKER_00: Damn, Yanis, okay.
• 45:35
  SPEAKER_03: I was wild, I was wild.
• 45:38
  SPEAKER_03: Drinking beer before 21.
• 45:40
  SPEAKER_03: How dare I?
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_03: Um you went you were in America for a while, weren't you?
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I went to university in America.
• 45:47
  SPEAKER_00: And yes, I did drink underage.
• 45:52
  SPEAKER_03: Us non-Americans just going and causing cases.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_00: Very cool, very cool.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_03: Um so they this is where you get that line, your favorite line, you need a wax.
• 46:04
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, it's so good.
• 46:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's so good.
• 46:07
  SPEAKER_00: Because you know for a fact that they wrote that in and they like had to run it by the studio exec and to see just how like raunchy they're we're allowed to get, and there was like a debate over it.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_00: But um, oh god, I just would love to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.
• 46:24
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's yeah, I want to know like how much they have to cut because it was too raunchy, and because I want to see how like borderline they got.
• 46:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um yes.
• 46:36
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, side note, I have to say this.
• 46:38
  SPEAKER_03: Mm-hmm.
• 46:40
  SPEAKER_00: Hillary Duff Light of My Life uh was wanna say his name is Mike Comey, something like that.
• 46:46
  SPEAKER_00: She was married to this guy who was a hockey player.
• 46:48
  SPEAKER_00: Now she's uh she's married to a musician, they have a kid, don't worry about it.
• 46:52
  SPEAKER_00: But when she was dating a hockey player, he uh proposed to her on a balcony, and then she immediately started uh performing fellatio on him, and all of that is caught by paparazzi, and those shots are the most joyous shots I've ever seen in my whole entire life.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_00: They are just so full of just childlike glee.
• 47:11
  SPEAKER_00: She got so excited she got proposed to, and then she went straight for the blowjob, and that's and then she like was taking pictures of the of her finger.
• 47:17
  SPEAKER_00: And like, nothing has made me love Hilary Duff more than that sequence of photos.
• 47:22
  SPEAKER_00: I urge you to Google them.
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_00: They'll put a full smile on your face.
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_03: You urge me to Google Hillary Duff giving a blowjob.
• 47:30
  SPEAKER_00: I would say Hillary Duff balcony proposal, you'll find everything you need to see.
• 47:36
  SPEAKER_03: No, I know.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna yeah.
• 47:41
  SPEAKER_03: I'm definitely gonna look it up.
• 47:42
  SPEAKER_03: I will be it's gonna be hilarious.
• 47:44
  SPEAKER_03: Um please.
• 47:46
  SPEAKER_03: I I also remember her like um she would this was like her period of like when she tried not now, but uh not that that not back then, but when she was I think it was with this guy when she first got married.
• 47:57
  SPEAKER_03: I guess like when she had that her first child, she said, Oh, someone was asking me, um I'm so clean cut, how did I um how did I have a child or something?
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_03: And she's like, I found a way.
• 48:10
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god! Is it a turkey baster?
• 48:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's horrifying.
• 48:17
  SPEAKER_03: So that's that's as far as she could go with it.
• 48:20
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, that's really funny.
• 48:23
  SPEAKER_03: It's some quote like that.
• 48:25
  SPEAKER_03: It's it's just I I can't remember the exact quote, but it's something it's it's something is like it's so clean-cut still.
• 48:31
  SPEAKER_00: That's really, really funny.
• 48:33
  SPEAKER_00: But also I find it very interesting because I don't think she was ever like Christian to me.
• 48:37
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know whether she's Christian or not.
• 48:39
  SPEAKER_00: Because there's like there's this like idea of squeaky clean cleanliness, there's that.
• 48:43
  SPEAKER_00: But there's also squeaky cleanliness and Christianity.
• 48:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I think like in that same vein, Allie and AJ were openly very, very Christian, and I remember thinking like, oh, they're like Christian girls.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_03: But that's after my time, so I don't know.
• 48:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, Allie and AJ potential breakup song.
• 48:58
  SPEAKER_03: I know I I know the song.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_00: Also, they just came out with an album that I haven't listened to, but it is called Joan of Arc on the Dance Floor, which yes.
• 49:09
  SPEAKER_03: Amazing.
• 49:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um but yeah, there was like two camps in the squeaky clean of like, are we squeaky clean because we're squeaky clean or because we love Jesus?
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_00: And that brings me to do you know Oh my god.
• 49:22
  SPEAKER_00: Do you know the two the two Christian girls on YouTube that have like how to wear makeup in a God honoring way?
• 49:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes, I do know them.
• 49:31
  SPEAKER_00: Is it like this what's that what's it called?
• 49:35
  SPEAKER_00: But basically, the the two of them they're amazing.
• 49:36
  SPEAKER_00: Wait, I need to Google their name.
• 49:38
  SPEAKER_00: Because one of them is dating an uh married to a gay man, and it's it's the whole thing is horrendous.
• 49:46
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
• 49:47
  SPEAKER_00: Two Christian girls.
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_00: Um, wait, what?
• 49:53
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 49:55
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, they are.
• 49:57
  SPEAKER_00: Two Christian girls on a balcony.
• 50:00
  SPEAKER_00: Um girl defined.
• 50:03
  SPEAKER_03: Girl defined.
• 50:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm obsessed with them.
• 50:07
  SPEAKER_00: Please Google them.
• 50:08
  SPEAKER_00: They're c they're like so funny.
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_00: Everything in a god-horing way, how to wear shorts in a god-honoring way.
• 50:13
  SPEAKER_00: The whole it all of it is amazing.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, are you wearing do you want to wear a tank top?
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_00: Just but you want to wear it in a god-honoring way?
• 50:20
  SPEAKER_00: Just throw a turtleneck under it.
• 50:22
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
• 50:31
  SPEAKER_00: I wore a turtleneck under my prom dress.
• 50:34
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_03: No, I I've only seen them in like one of those like uh reaction videos, so I don't I haven't I didn't know that one of them had a gay husband.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_00: They're amazing.
• 50:46
  SPEAKER_00: They're all like, how do you not be horny?
• 50:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's so good.
• 50:50
  SPEAKER_03: That's the I think that's the one I've seen.
• 50:53
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, by the way, I don't know why I just thought of this, but we're but while we're talking about this movie, do you know who was supposed to be uh the in the role of Austin?
• 51:03
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god, who?
• 51:05
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, this is amazing.
• 51:08
  SPEAKER_03: Rupert Grinn.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_00: Shut the fuck up.
• 51:11
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, I don't believe you.
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_00: I just don't believe you.
• 51:13
  SPEAKER_03: Look it up, look it up.
• 51:14
  SPEAKER_03: Wait, why?
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_00: Because of scheduling difficulties?
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_03: He was filming Prisoner of Azkavan and he couldn't get out of it.
• 51:19
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, Yanis, how much money do you have on your bank account?
• 51:22
  SPEAKER_00: Because we are pooling our resources and we are refilming a shot by shot remake of a Cinderella story starring Rupert fucking Grint.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_03: Can you imagine how bad this would have been with Rupert Grinnt in Chad Michael Murray's role?
• 51:37
  SPEAKER_00: Would he be doing an American accent?
• 51:40
  SPEAKER_03: I think so.
• 51:41
  SPEAKER_03: I hope so.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's insane! It's it's amazing.
• 51:48
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so happy you just told me that.
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_03: Because like you think Rupert Grinnt, you think, oh okay, he would have he would have been the best friend.
• 51:54
  SPEAKER_03: No, he would have been Chad Michael Murray.
• 51:58
  SPEAKER_00: Would he get like jacked for the role?
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_00: I would love to see like his regimen for like getting an American football player's bot.
• 52:08
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, he would have had to play the American football player.
• 52:11
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, that's so funny.
• 52:13
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't even think of that.
• 52:14
  SPEAKER_00: I was just thinking of as a like a Marvel, Marvel Kumail type of like transformation thing.
• 52:20
  SPEAKER_03: At like 15 years old.
• 52:24
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, yeah, no, I'm doing a human growth hormone and I'm doing steroids.
• 52:31
  SPEAKER_03: Because that's the other thing about this.
• 52:32
  SPEAKER_03: Chad Michael Murray's 22, Hillary Duff is 16.
• 52:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, sweetie, no.
• 52:39
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, what is this?
• 52:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's Brooklyn?
• 52:42
  SPEAKER_00: Um Wow, that is bad.
• 52:45
  SPEAKER_00: I do not like that.
• 52:46
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the same with freaking when they hired Mila Kunas on that Samity show at the age of four.
• 52:51
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's so gross.
• 52:52
  SPEAKER_03: And then they pretend they didn't know she was underage.
• 52:56
  SPEAKER_03: They knew.
• 52:57
  SPEAKER_03: There's no way they didn't.
• 52:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so she has uh but anyway, like back to this back to this movie.
• 53:03
  SPEAKER_03: Um they uh Austin breaks up with Shelby.
• 53:08
  SPEAKER_03: Uh before they go to the uh the dance, and she is pissed off and immediately storms out.
• 53:17
  SPEAKER_00: Um breaks up with her in front of everyone.
• 53:24
  SPEAKER_03: But I'll say this he does say we need to talk privately, and she says, no, let's talk in front of everyone.
• 53:30
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so what you're saying, you're blaming the woman.
• 53:32
  SPEAKER_00: I see.
• 53:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I blame the woman for that.
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_03: That's her own fault.
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_03: No, he's it's still awful.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_03: I wouldn't have done it.
• 53:40
  SPEAKER_03: Um he breaks up with her and then but then she storms out and he's he's like fine about it, he doesn't care.
• 53:54
  SPEAKER_03: He g but he's still gonna go to the prom.
• 53:56
  SPEAKER_03: Not the prom I keep calling it the prom, but it's not a prom, it's just a a dance.
• 54:00
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's it's a dance.
• 54:02
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I keep calling it the prom, but it's a dance.
• 54:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's a dance, it's a dance.
• 54:06
  SPEAKER_03: I because again, I don't know what these dances are.
• 54:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um also there are they have the production value is like fucking Vanity Fair Oscars party level.
• 54:15
  SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah, but they're they're a rich school.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_03: You know that's a ri that's like a private school.
• 54:20
  SPEAKER_03: Hundreds of people.
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, yeah, and everyone there is 22.
• 54:25
  SPEAKER_03: Except for Hillary Duff and her best friend who look their age.
• 54:29
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, Rupert Grint would have been a better casting simply because he was younger, right?
• 54:34
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 54:34
  SPEAKER_03: I wonder if they would have like changed his.
• 54:38
  SPEAKER_03: Surely they would have changed uh the football player stuff.
• 54:41
  SPEAKER_03: Surely that would have been a few years.
• 54:42
  SPEAKER_00: Would he just be in band?
• 54:44
  SPEAKER_00: But he needed to be the popular boy.
• 54:46
  SPEAKER_03: That being you can't be popular unless you're in in football.
• 54:49
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, yes, but we'll throw in two movies, 21 Jump Street, where they subverted the whole popular jock thing, and how like remember Channing Dayton was like, I'm cool, and then fucking Dave Franco was like, not anymore.
• 55:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I would like to point out um the I believe 1999 epic Never Been Kissed, in which the cool guy in the class was Guy, who was like heroin chic.
• 55:16
  SPEAKER_00: He was like really skinny and he played guitar, and that I think was one of the Was that James Franco?
• 55:22
  SPEAKER_00: No, that it was James Franco was one of his friends.
• 55:24
  SPEAKER_00: Guy, I don't think he he he had much of a career.
• 55:27
  SPEAKER_00: I apologize if you're listening.
• 55:28
  SPEAKER_00: I am calling you by your character name.
• 55:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um yeah.
• 55:32
  SPEAKER_00: I guess Chad Michael Murray in Freaky Friday was like a rocker, but he was still quite like but he was never meant to be the popular guy in school.
• 55:39
  SPEAKER_00: Whereas Guy and Never Been Kissed is very clearly the the most popular guy in school and a skinny rocker.
• 55:47
  SPEAKER_03: That's true.
• 55:47
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so I'm sorry that I I have so many opinions on this.
• 55:51
  SPEAKER_03: No, that's great, great.
• 55:52
  SPEAKER_03: Have all the opinions you want.
• 55:54
  SPEAKER_03: Just cause you can say whatever you want on him.
• 55:56
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 55:59
  SPEAKER_03: They um yeah, so Hillary Dust decides that she's going to go to the dance and she has to get back by 12 o'clock, which is the whole Cinderella stuff.
• 56:10
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, right.
• 56:10
  SPEAKER_00: It's a Cinderella story.
• 56:12
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 56:13
  SPEAKER_03: How are they gonna work in uh her glass slipper?
• 56:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um we will find out later.
• 56:20
  SPEAKER_03: They um yeah.
• 56:24
  SPEAKER_03: This is when Jennifer Courish says to her, You're not very pretty and you're not very bright.
• 56:28
  SPEAKER_03: Which is so awful.
• 56:29
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, yes, that was absolutely so awful.
• 56:35
  SPEAKER_03: Um but then they go so they go, they take her to go and get a costume uh at the costume shop, and it's just about to close, of course.
• 56:44
  SPEAKER_03: But then they go in and they have a montage scene of her dressing in every costume imaginable until they find that little mask that covers covers like a tenth of her face.
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yep, and we all and we all live for the movie montage scene.
• 57:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 57:03
  SPEAKER_03: Of course.
• 57:04
  SPEAKER_03: It has to happen in a teen movie.
• 57:05
  SPEAKER_03: If there's no m movie montage in a teen movie, it's it's not a teen movie.
• 57:09
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, let's let's talk about like the I guess we'll talk about the uh the where they meet and everything.
• 57:18
  SPEAKER_03: They meet in like a gazebo! Okay, so it's a wedding venue, somehow.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_03: I guess it's like where they I don't know.
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_03: They meet in a wedding venue, yeah.
• 57:32
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's really interesting how obsessed they think teenagers are with like getting married.
• 57:41
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 57:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like she's 16.
• 57:44
  SPEAKER_00: Why are you like putting her in a white dress into a wedding venue?
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, she's wearing a wedding dress.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_00: Why is she like is she a child bride?
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_00: What's going on?
• 57:54
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, he is 22 and she's 16.
• 57:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yup.
• 57:59
  SPEAKER_03: So they have they have their wedding dance to I'll be.
• 58:04
  SPEAKER_00: Oh god.
• 58:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like prime early 2000s music.
• 58:10
  SPEAKER_03: They make out she runs off because it's nearly 12 o'clock.
• 58:15
  SPEAKER_00: Because in in a squeaky clean Disney movie or Disney-esque movie, making out is basically losing your virginity.
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 58:24
  SPEAKER_03: Oh no, they don't make out, sorry.
• 58:26
  SPEAKER_03: They're about to make out.
• 58:28
  SPEAKER_03: Carter and Shelby make out.
• 58:31
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 58:32
  SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, because oh yeah, because like you can't climax everything with sex because sex is not allowed, so you have to climax everything with kisses.
• 58:38
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly, exactly.
• 58:40
  SPEAKER_03: Um yeah, then she runs off, she drops her phone, he picks it up.
• 58:45
  SPEAKER_03: The phone is the new glass slipper.
• 58:48
  SPEAKER_00: Love that.
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_00: Love, love, love, love that.
• 58:50
  SPEAKER_00: What would it be now?
• 58:51
  SPEAKER_00: An Apple Watch?
• 58:54
  SPEAKER_00: She drops her Fitbit.
• 58:56
  SPEAKER_03: It would it would have it can't be a phone because the phone would want she'd want that back immediately now.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_03: It would ha yeah.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what it was.
• 59:03
  SPEAKER_00: It would be her step counter.
• 59:04
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not sure what it would be, but but yeah, so they they do all that.
• 59:10
  SPEAKER_03: Then there's the whole stuff of like Austin gets into Princeton.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_00: Uh to the disappointment of his father.
• 59:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_03: Fiona finds the acceptance letter that uh Samantha.
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_03: Samantha, Sam.
• 59:26
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, she gets into Princeton.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_03: Fiona finds the letter, hides it, and uh gives her a fake letter that says she didn't get in.
• 59:35
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that was the level of cruelty of that is insane.
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, the twins tell Shelby, they find so the twins find out about Shelby.
• 59:45
  SPEAKER_03: Uh uh about uh Sam and Austin.
• 59:48
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 59:48
  SPEAKER_03: They tell Shelby, they get their own back on her at the pep rally by doing a whole show about it, and then everyone in the school chants diner girl at her and she runs away crying, which is so awful.
• 1:00:05
  SPEAKER_03: It's mean.
• 1:00:06
  SPEAKER_00: But also, like, is working at a diner lame?
• 1:00:10
  SPEAKER_00: No, I'm sorry, first of all, it's not, but even in like the rich kid hierarchy, if we think like rich kids are cool and working at a diner is lame, which I obviously don't agree with, it's like class isn't really problematic, but he works at a fucking car wash.
• 1:00:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's true.
• 1:00:26
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't make any sense.
• 1:00:28
  SPEAKER_00: How is it like cool to work at a car wash, but not cool to work at a diner?
• 1:00:32
  SPEAKER_03: Because he plays football.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_00: Well, she's really good at baseball.
• 1:00:36
  SPEAKER_00: What the fuck, man?
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but that's a that's a boy sport.
• 1:00:43
  SPEAKER_00: But boy girls who act like boys are cool.
• 1:00:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's the early 2000s.
• 1:00:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's true as well.
• 1:00:48
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's it's yeah, it's really problematic.
• 1:00:51
  SPEAKER_03: Um but like this all leads to her like deciding to quit uh working in the diner, all this stuff happens, she moves in with Rhonda, and then she finds out about um she finds out about the letter, she finds when she goes to move in with Rhonda, she finds the um the will in her book that her dad left that ends up entitling her to everything.
• 1:01:18
  SPEAKER_03: And so she ends up getting everything and she gives the din she lets Rhonda manage the diner.
• 1:01:23
  SPEAKER_03: Uh then they and then she she says she has one more thing to do tonight, don't wait up for me.
• 1:01:29
  SPEAKER_03: She runs to the the football game and watches it, but then it's too hard for her.
• 1:01:37
  SPEAKER_00: So she Yeah, because um it's really difficult for a Christian woman with needs to suppress her body's desires.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_00: I love you guys.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I'm Christian, yes, I get horny.
• 1:01:53
  SPEAKER_03: Is that a quote from that show?
• 1:01:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we exist, yeah.
• 1:02:00
  SPEAKER_03: They so there she tells him she goes and tells him at at the in the locker room, she watches walks into the locker room and she says, uh, you're phony.
• 1:02:11
  SPEAKER_03: Waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this route.
• 1:02:14
  SPEAKER_03: Useless and disappointing.
• 1:02:15
  SPEAKER_03: Oh and then she goes and watches the football game.
• 1:02:21
  SPEAKER_00: So like she's she does she she does a neg, is what you're saying.
• 1:02:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's a that's a full-on neg.
• 1:02:27
  SPEAKER_03: And um, yeah, then then he goes to play his his game, and as he's playing the game, he uh looks up and she's about to leave because she takes it this is too hot for her to watch.
• 1:02:38
  SPEAKER_03: As though she didn't realise that already.
• 1:02:40
  SPEAKER_03: And they um he goes to leave and he says, uh, my favourite quote from any scene movie, because it's the the most cliche thing.
• 1:02:51
  SPEAKER_03: Uh his dad says, Austin, if you leave now, you're giving up on your dreams, and you and then he goes, No, dad, I'm giving up on your dreams.
• 1:03:00
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah.
• 1:03:02
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, when they when you throw it back by just saying the same thing that was just said to you, oh man.
• 1:03:09
  SPEAKER_00: That that's then that's what I call writing.
• 1:03:12
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 1:03:13
  SPEAKER_03: It's so unless that's in a teen movie again, it's not a teen movie.
• 1:03:18
  SPEAKER_00: It's so good.
• 1:03:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because what they did was was was write a line, and then they copied and pasted, and they take took that line and gave it to a different person, and that is dialogue.
• 1:03:28
  SPEAKER_03: That's amazing dialogue.
• 1:03:31
  SPEAKER_03: Every yeah, so she leaves, he runs after her.
• 1:03:33
  SPEAKER_03: I'm throwing away your dreams.
• 1:03:34
  SPEAKER_03: They kiss, the rain falls, the drought is ended, she got her prince, she finds the will, they arrest Fiona, and Fiona has to work it off for Rhonda.
• 1:03:48
  SPEAKER_03: Which I if I was Rhonda, I would not want her working there.
• 1:03:51
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, yeah, she's terrible.
• 1:03:53
  SPEAKER_00: Uh but also now that you tell me that the n let the rain come clean, it doesn't play when the rain comes down, I mean that is just u upsetting.
• 1:04:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:04:05
  SPEAKER_03: It's very upsetting.
• 1:04:06
  SPEAKER_03: And and you would think like, did you first of all did you think that as well then?
• 1:04:12
  SPEAKER_03: Or was it just a little bit?
• 1:04:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, if you asked me, I would have said, yeah, that probably that that checks out.
• 1:04:17
  SPEAKER_03: It's some other song that I don't I'd never heard other than in this movie.
• 1:04:21
  SPEAKER_03: I I can't remember what it is, but it's clearly here to read off.
• 1:04:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um But it ends with that, it ends with the movie.
• 1:04:28
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I just love that they Do you think she got paid twice as much money because she's also on the soundtrack?
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's in her contract that she had to have a song in it.
• 1:04:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, do you think that she like won't be in a movie unless she can sing in it?
• 1:04:46
  SPEAKER_03: I hope so.
• 1:04:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I wonder if like that's her thing, where she's like or like her recording stud uh contract with I'm assuming Hollywood Records, uh, because that's who records Disney people, is like we won't let you be in a movie unless you record four songs for it.
• 1:05:03
  SPEAKER_03: I really hope so.
• 1:05:04
  SPEAKER_03: And I prop I'm sure it's probably true as well.
• 1:05:08
  SPEAKER_00: Mr.
• 1:05:09
  SPEAKER_00: Hollywood Records! Mr.
• 1:05:10
  SPEAKER_00: Hollywood.
• 1:05:13
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna I'm I'll put it out there to the public.
• 1:05:15
  SPEAKER_00: Consider yourself called out.
• 1:05:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:05:17
  SPEAKER_03: Can you answer us, please?
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_03: It's important.
• 1:05:20
  SPEAKER_03: We need to know this.
• 1:05:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um and Hilary Duff, if you're listening as well, please tell us.
• 1:05:26
  SPEAKER_00: We love you.
• 1:05:27
  SPEAKER_00: We love you, Hill.
• 1:05:28
  SPEAKER_03: We love you so much.
• 1:05:29
  SPEAKER_00: Have you been watching Younger?
• 1:05:31
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 1:05:32
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, she's in a TV show called Younger.
• 1:05:35
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't seen it, so that I can't tell much, but there you go.
• 1:05:39
  SPEAKER_03: Is it a wait, is it a a kid show or is it?
• 1:05:42
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, no.
• 1:05:42
  SPEAKER_00: It's like I think she actually like dates in the city, which is fun.
• 1:05:47
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, and then she like was meant to be in a Lizzie McGuire like grown up version, and then like called it off because it wasn't sexy enough.
• 1:05:57
  SPEAKER_03: Didn't they want like an R-rated hit uh R-rated?
• 1:06:00
  SPEAKER_03: Lizzie McGuire.
• 1:06:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:06:01
  SPEAKER_00: And Disney was like, Lindsay Lizzie can't fuck, and then Lizzie was like, Well, then I'm not gonna do anything.
• 1:06:08
  SPEAKER_03: That's amazing.
• 1:06:10
  SPEAKER_03: That would have been such a funny show.
• 1:06:12
  SPEAKER_00: Lizzie can't fuck to the to the tune of Papa Don't Preach.
• 1:06:18
  SPEAKER_03: Record it.
• 1:06:21
  SPEAKER_03: Since I don't want to keep you too much longer, I want to ask you like one more question.
• 1:06:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 1:06:25
  SPEAKER_03: And uh let's let's move on from this and let's talk about a movie that you consider to be bad that everyone loves that's well reviewed.
• 1:06:36
  SPEAKER_00: Uh very good question.
• 1:06:41
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna throw out there the last uh Star Wars movie.
• 1:06:46
  SPEAKER_00: Did not love.
• 1:06:47
  SPEAKER_00: Did people love that though?
• 1:06:48
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 1:06:50
  SPEAKER_03: No, that was very interesting.
• 1:06:52
  SPEAKER_00: Never mind, sorry.
• 1:06:53
  SPEAKER_00: That's okay.
• 1:06:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, that's a really good question.
• 1:06:55
  SPEAKER_00: Uh uh uh, what do people love?
• 1:06:57
  SPEAKER_00: Throw what is a good movie?
• 1:07:00
  SPEAKER_03: Uh all I can think of is The Godfather and So Cliche.
• 1:07:04
  SPEAKER_03: Citizen Kane.
• 1:07:05
  SPEAKER_03: Citizen Kane, do you hate Citizen Kane?
• 1:07:07
  SPEAKER_00: I've never seen Citizen Kane.
• 1:07:11
  SPEAKER_03: Um It's a good question.
• 1:07:15
  SPEAKER_03: It can be any, it can like literally any any big movie.
• 1:07:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um, okay, this is gonna be get me cancelled.
• 1:07:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm ready.
• 1:07:23
  SPEAKER_03: Go for it.
• 1:07:24
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't love little women.
• 1:07:26
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, okay.
• 1:07:28
  SPEAKER_00: I came in wanting to adore it.
• 1:07:31
  SPEAKER_00: I was ready to go.
• 1:07:32
  SPEAKER_00: I was ready to love it, love it, love it, love it.
• 1:07:35
  SPEAKER_00: And I just didn't because I thought so basically my my qualm was that Greta Gerwig was taking her um, like she was doing stuff creatively that wasn't in the book, right?
• 1:07:55
  SPEAKER_00: So she made the the guy who um the main girl ends up marrying much younger than he was in the book.
• 1:08:03
  SPEAKER_00: She added this whole layer of like they end up together because the editor asked me to, etc.
• 1:08:09
  SPEAKER_00: etc.
• 1:08:10
  SPEAKER_00: etc.
• 1:08:10
  SPEAKER_00: But I think basically it set up this um conundrum that a lot of women to this day face, which is like it's not career or love.
• 1:08:21
  SPEAKER_00: We want both.
• 1:08:23
  SPEAKER_00: And the fact that like you can't provide both for us, or like society can't provide both, like, and that the patr like the patriarchy sets up this dichotomy when it's actually doesn't have to be a choice, or when you do choose career, are you still allowed to yearn for love, or have you made your choice and it's embarrassing, etc.
• 1:08:40
  SPEAKER_00: I think it sets up all these questions really, really well, but the resolution is too neat, and then I felt like the little wink and break of the fourth wall by saying it's neat because the editor told us to was it a cop-out, because at the end of the day, you didn't provide the the the satisf like the satisfying deep resolution because you couldn't, so you did a cop-out instead of being like wink wink haha, but what is okay, cool.
• 1:09:05
  SPEAKER_00: So the resolution that you did provide wasn't was was fake, so what's the real one?
• 1:09:11
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, I'm rambling.
• 1:09:12
  SPEAKER_00: But essentially set up an extremely interesting question, then failed to resolve it, and then essentially use the fact that I'm like, well, that's the book as a cop-out when in fact it did adjust things in the book when it wanted to.
• 1:09:30
  SPEAKER_00: Also, Bobenkirk Odinkirk as the fucking dad.
• 1:09:33
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, dude, you can't like he's not gonna be not Sal.
• 1:09:36
  SPEAKER_00: Do you know what I mean?
• 1:09:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:09:38
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
• 1:09:40
  SPEAKER_03: Is he very much Okay, so is he Sal in in I haven't seen it yet.
• 1:09:43
  SPEAKER_03: I've been meaning to watch it.
• 1:09:45
  SPEAKER_03: Is he very much Sal in it then?
• 1:09:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I mean he can't not be.
• 1:09:48
  SPEAKER_00: He absolutely can't not be.
• 1:09:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's the same when they put Kristen Wig and fucking mother.
• 1:09:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, dude, you can't just put Kristen Wig and shit and think that we're gonna take it seriously.
• 1:10:00
  SPEAKER_03: Great.
• 1:10:01
  SPEAKER_03: Well Sorry, that was a rant.
• 1:10:03
  SPEAKER_03: No, no, no.
• 1:10:04
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I want from this.
• 1:10:05
  SPEAKER_03: I want rants.
• 1:10:06
  SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, so this was great.
• 1:10:08
  SPEAKER_03: I don't want to keep you much longer, so I'm gonna let you go now.
• 1:10:11
  SPEAKER_03: Um, yeah, thank you so much for doing this.
• 1:10:14
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for having me.
• 1:10:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's been a delight.
• 1:10:16
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry for rambling so much.
• 1:10:18
  SPEAKER_03: You didn't ramble.
• 1:10:19
  SPEAKER_03: You didn't ramble.
• 1:10:21
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 1:10:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um how can we find you?
• 1:10:24
  SPEAKER_03: Uh do you have anything to plug at the moment?
• 1:10:27
  SPEAKER_00: I'm at rock and roll on Twitter, I'm Colga300 on Instagram, and I'm rock'n'rollga.com for website for my website where you can find gigs and stuff.
• 1:10:37
  SPEAKER_00: Um yeah.
• 1:10:39
  SPEAKER_03: Great.
• 1:10:40
  SPEAKER_03: Amazing.
• 1:10:41
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you so much for doing this.
• 1:10:42
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so so much.
• 1:10:43
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, thank you, thank you.
• 1:10:47
  SPEAKER_03: That's the end of the podcast.
• 1:10:48
  SPEAKER_03: You can find me on Twitter with the username at YCove or at Yannis Cove on Instagram.
• 1:10:54
  SPEAKER_03: Please remember to rate and review us on iTunes if you enjoyed this, so I can end up making more.
• 1:10:58
  SPEAKER_03: And I'll see you next week for more movies that critics got roll.