Latest / Stuff Mom Never Told You / Happy Hour #128: Wedding Reflections

Transcript

Happy Hour #128: Wedding Reflections · Stuff Mom Never Told You

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Hey, this is Anny and Samantha.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: I'm welcome to Steff I've never told you a production
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: of iHeartRadio, and welcome to another edition of Happy Hour.
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: As always, nothing we talk about in here is sponsored currently.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: But also, drink responsibly or whatever you're doing, do it responsibly. Samantha,
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: are you sipping on anything?
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: Water?
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Water?
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: I'm sticking with the water today because it's a little
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: warm and all the things.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: Yes, well, water is amazing.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: I am mixing it up today and it's actually relevant
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: to what I'm going to talk about. I have a
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: white wine, oh, of which I cannot tell you. It's chardonnay.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: Oh okay.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I don't normally drink white wine. I don't really have
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: a problem with is just not my preference. But I
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: recently attended a wedding and at the end of the night,
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: I left with wine.
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: With alcoholic beverages.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: They gave it to me.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: They gave me one bottle of red and one bottle
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: of white. So I thought I would enjoy this because
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: I am going to be talking about that experience in
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: a second. But Samantha and I have just been chatting.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: I feel like my life is in complete disarray right now.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: I've just got a lot of things going on. My
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: car didn't start this morning, smith.
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: Though we knew it was coming. We knew it was coming.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but I need it for this weekend, so hopefully
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: I can fix it.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: I think it's just the battery but didn't start.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: I still got my toilet issues, like a health situation
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: the other day. Yeah, it's just been a mess. And
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: it reminds me of all those headlines that you read
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: that make me roll my eyes, where they're like, how
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: your apartment, wherever you live is is a reflection of
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: your state of mind. I'm like, oh no, my state
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: of mind is not. I don't have any particular worse
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: drama than normal.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe it's just reached this point, all right. I
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: don't know.
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: I think everybody might be filling it. I'm not sure
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: if it's with all of the lunar things or the
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: magnet things. I don't know, but yeah, I feel like
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: things are piling up. That's not too cute. I remember
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: with the lunar New Year's stuff that they were talking
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: about the fact that the signs are not that great
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: to hear. The dragon is beneficial for some but not
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: for all. And myself my sign is a monkey, and
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: apparently it's not supposed to be a good year, and
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: I don't like the fact that's falling into that. Not
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: that it's a bad year, but it's not the most balanced.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: That way, right, mm hmmm. Yeah.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: Did you happen to see any of the like the
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: northern Lights. I'm so bummed I missed it.
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: I'm not gonna lie. For some reason, I just did
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: not care.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: Oh I would have died.
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: Apparently, like you could only see it through.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: The phone, though I had a friend of a friend
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: who took a She said she couldn't see it, but
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: she took a picture through the phone and it was
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: really pretty well. Yeah, so we're both feeling a little
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: bit out of sorts, I would say.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: But I did have a bright spot I wanted to
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: talk about. And this is that.
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: Old producer of the show friend of ours, Dylan got married. Yes, yes,
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: And it was beautiful. It had all of these events
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: around it. There was bowling, and I went with my
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: good friend Katie, who's been on the show. And I
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: was surprised, given how many times you and I have
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: complained about not even complained, but been like, wow, I.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Was so upset after this event. It was lovely.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: I saw people I didn't know were going to be
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: there and legitimately just felt so happy to see them,
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: like it was such a wonderful surprise. Also, I'm terrible
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: at bowling, and I believe I got a fourteen, like horrendous.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: In my defense, I was sharing it with my friend Katie.
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: We were taking every other turn. But still that's even
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: so I should have done better because my arm wouldn't
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: be as tired. Yeah, but it was like a really
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: beautiful thing. And then the next day there was a
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: dinner at a local restaurant and there are even more
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: people I wasn't expecting to be there, and it was
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: so lovely.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: And of course I was talking about all these horror
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: movies like.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: Hot Sauces and ridiculous things, But instead of feeling bad
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: about that, like I normally do at parties these days,
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: I was just happy I got to got to hang
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: out with folks. Yeah, and Dylan and his wife were
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: such a beautiful couple. They were so great. They were
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: so gracious, and it was like one of the weddings
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: where they had the speeches and I was crying. Everybody
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: was crying, and it was a delicious meal. All of that,
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: and then there was karaoke.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: Which was great.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Me and my friend Katie saying Rob Zombie, which she
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: says she got cleared with Dylan because I told her specifically,
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: this is their wedding, we are not going to be
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: weird with their song choices, and she faked her Rob
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: Zombie song, and definitely all of the older people in
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: the karaoke space lived after we sang.
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: Game.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: We nailed it, and that is that's where I got
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: the wine. But I guess what I wanted to talk
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: about ultimately is it was such a beautiful experience.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: It was so lovely.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: But this was my first time being at a wedding
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: since I've come out as Ace, and none of my
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: friends care at all. But I did run into and
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: this is not the first time this has happened to me,
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: but one of our lift drivers, when he heard we
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: were at a wedding, he was asking about, you know,
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: are you too with anybody? And I was like, no,
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: I'm good, And I didn't really say I was just
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: kind of like, no, whatever, But he was concerned. He
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: was concerned about me. He was like, I don't think
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: you can be happy like this. I think you're gonna
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: have to, you know, the underlying message of being like
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: you're getting older, to the point my friend stepped in
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: and was like, she is good man, She's fine.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: And ultimately it.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: Worked out and he kind of begrudgingly was like, oh, okay,
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: if you say you're fine, But it was very begrudging.
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: It was very disbelieving that this could be the case.
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: And it was just strange because I know we've talked
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: about this several times on the show, even just being
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: a single woman, never mind your identity, your gender identity,
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: queer identity, whatever, you get those questions, you get that
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: all of the time. I guess this was the first
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: time I've been pretty confident in being a sexual that
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: that has happened to me with a stranger, like in
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: front of other people, because it happens online a lot,
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: but in front of like other people who know how
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: I identify. And it was very, very.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: Bizarre how.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: He was so confident that you need to find you
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: a man or you're just sad. It was very clear
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: he was like, otherwise, you're just sad. And you kept
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: asking like, well, have you just had a bad breakup,
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: Like have you trying to get to the bottom of
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: my whatever it could be, why I wouldn't want it
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: to be with someone a man he very clearly indicated,
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: and that I wasn't in a rush to get married.
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: And my friend, like bless her, she was stepping in
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: and she was like arguing for me. I kind of
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: really didn't care, but it was it was a little
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: jarring because I've kind of just I've gotten used to it.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: I don't really think about it anymore. I did used
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: to worry about it, and if you've listened to this show,
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: you know how far I've come since then.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: But I did. I really used to worry about that,
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: and now I'm good. I'm good.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: But he It's interesting to me how many people who
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: don't even know you feel very confident in telling you
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: you need that man though.
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: That's the thing. I'm kind of like, how old was he?
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: Was he elderly? Like like Boomer? Was he?
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: You know?
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: I would say he was maybe a little older than me.
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: Really, yeah, so in like younger than me in your
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: age range, yes, And he really was like because it
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: sounds like something a grandpa would say, right, which is
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: like annoying as it is, But a dude in our
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: like age group with my brother. You're you're driving an uber,
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: which is fine because you do what you need to do,
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: but you're doing a customer customer service. Why are you
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: trying to give life advice?
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: That's a good point.
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: Well, like, this is not like a thing where you
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: stop being and say I'm going to teach you how
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: to fix your life. Sure, like, there are times that
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: you have a good conversation and have a fun time
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: and if you ask for advice, perhaps in like the
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: customer service industry, giving unsolicited advice and then arguing about
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: it when they're like, nah, I'm good, not the route
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: to take.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: No, And this is this is not the first time
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: this has happened to me. In a lift, I had
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: someone else very concerned. I wasn't married, but that was
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: that was a long time ago. But I guess that
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: One of the parts to me that stands out is
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: I don't feel like I made any I was just like, no,
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: I don't feel like I made any grand statement of
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: no man in my life, no marriage ever. I just said,
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: oh no, nobody really good? Uh?
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: And he couldn't let it go.
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: Did he. He didn't act offended, just concerned.
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: Yes, was he married.
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: I don't know, so he didn't.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: I wasn't asking him right.
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: My question though, is like coming from like a dude,
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: be like, look, I've got the I've been in the
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: amazing relationship blah blah blah. That would none of this
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: makes sense. Your interactions have always thrown me off anyway
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: when it comes home, like people say that to you.
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: Why because I have a face apparently that just like
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: don't start, I don't start, Like I think that's the
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: face I give. Yeah, but like that's the fact that
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: Katie finally stepped in, which is amazing.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: Did he so?
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: She said she had a relationship and he was like,
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: oh cool, yeah, and then went on to you and
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: then was like upset about your situation.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, and it Yeah. It was very bizarre too,
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: because like I said, I I wasn't trying to I
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: don't know. He just asked his question because we were
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: going to a wedding and so it came up. But
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: I don't feel like I was. It's odd that he
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: latched onto it. And also my Katie afterwards apologize to
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: me and she was like I'm so sorry, like I
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: hope that was okay that I did that, which it
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: totally was, but it was kind of like, oh, he
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: paid it. He listened to her, who is in a relationship, right.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: But not me?
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: Was he trying to hit on you?
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: It didn't feel that way to me. It could be
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: you know, I'm not the greatest about that. It did
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: to me.
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: I felt like I need to ask ask the friend.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you can ask Katie I because to me, it
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: Moore felt like he I don't think he said he
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: never said his relationship status, or if he did, I
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: tuned it out completely. But to me it sounded more
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: like he was speaking from what he assumed was knowledge,
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: like I'm in, I'm married. Let me tell you you
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: need to get married.
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: And he said this sound like a very heteronormative ideal,
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: Like it wasn't even like questioning whether or not you
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: were a lesbian.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: Oh yes, he was definitely get married to a man.
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: I think he's been Uh he's a fan of this
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: Harrison dude from the Kansas City Chiefs.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: Samantha. He is from Georgia.
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: Oh, I know I've read that. I was like, Oh,
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: there's apparely was rumors at him.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: I remember him. I was there.
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: Did you go to school together?
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: He?
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: I think he might have been a little after me,
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: but he was the one Georgia Tech game I watched
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: and we won and it was.
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: Because of him. And now the ki Yeah, it's because
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: of the kicker. Interesting yeah, interesting, always with the sports
• 13:35
  Speaker 4: people out of Georgia Tech. It's not good news.
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: Get the commencement speech there that was similar to the
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: one he just got viral floor.
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not surprised. I'm disappointed, but not surprised. Yeah,
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: I mean, I guess we have talked about that before
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: of dudes feeling very like it's totally in their space
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: to just give you this advice and tell you why
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: it's wrong that you want to have an independent any
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: independence at all, right, and not maybe not get married.
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: Here's how things are wrong with you.
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: Be fuled.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: Okay, Oh, anyway, I'm just perplexed as to how this
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: came up.
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: Well, more perplexed that you feel very comfortable just speaking
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: about it.
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: Really really kind of shocked.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was it was something, but I mean it
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: didn't really upset me. It was just something that gave
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: me pause. Yeah, it was just strange. And then you know,
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: if a friend apologizes to you for sticking up for
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: you and then you've kind of feel strange of like, oh.
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: I G.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: It just puts things in perspective of I.
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: I wasn't really thinking about it in that way, but
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: she was being a good friend, was like, no, don't
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: talk about it like that.
• 15:09
  Speaker 3: This is not for you to decide.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Shut it.
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, so, I I guess. Ultimately, cheers too, good friends,
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: you submit the Katie Dylan, all the happiness everyone I
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: saw at the wedding, and you know, in those times
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: where it seems everything is going amiss a little bit,
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: it's nice to remember you've got good friends, you got
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: your people. Yes, so thank you and thank you listeners.
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: We include you in that as well. If you have
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: any thoughts about this, if you've had any strange conversations
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: that you really didn't ask for, please let us know.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: You can email the step in your mom Stuff at
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: iHeartMedia dot com. You can find us on Twitter at
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: mom Stuff podcast, or on Instagram and TikTok at stuff
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: We never told you. We're also on YouTube. We have
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: a tea public store, and we have a book you
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: can get wherever you get your books. Thanks Zowis too.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Our super producer, Christina o're executive producer My and your
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: contributor Joey.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: Thank you and thanks to you for listening. Stuff I
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Never Told You is production by Heart Radio.
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: For more podcasts or my heart Radio, you can check
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: out the heart Radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: listen to your favorite shows.