Latest / Jess Ask / Oh to be Chosen:Submitting to Living In Faith | Featuring Andrea “Lynn” Gates | EP43

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Oh to be Chosen:Submitting to Living In Faith | Featuring Andrea “Lynn” Gates | EP43 · Jess Ask

0:06
Hey, it's your girl, Jess. You've just entered a safe space for
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Kingdom entrepreneurs and creatives to decompress, have fun, and yeah, you've guessed
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it a safe place to just ask. Before we get into it, be
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sure to subscribe and download the podcast. Follow me on all platforms at the
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justices Smith and Invital Friend. Also make sure you DM me your feedback and
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questions so we can keep the conversation going. Now, let's get into this
0:41
week's episode. You know what she was doing, and that was her intention.
0:46
Her intention was to leave you out of space and a place. Yeah,
0:50
you know what I'm saying that you weren't prior to her being there,
0:54
you know, So you can just flow onto into what's next. I go
0:58
back to the to day that I was trying to run away from this and
1:03
you probably don't even know it. Prophetica and the first time we had it
1:07
up. You mean you're talking about that and you and you sang over me,
1:15
oh what my song surround us in this place? I sure didn't breathe
1:19
you send. I was really down. Oh oh, I was so down.
1:27
Oh, whether I was feeling mad, I was in my color purple
1:44
moment. The purple. Look you had the purple clocks and past the gates.
1:52
You. I didn't even know you knew my name like that. That's
1:55
real, girl. Please. I remember the first time I came to the
1:59
connect, you walked up to me and said, hey, you need some
2:02
water? Yeah I did, because you spoke to us that day. Yeah,
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yeah I did. I didn't know you then, but I just remember
2:12
you walking up to me and you was like, hey, that's the case.
2:15
I'm Jessica. Do you need anything? And I was just like,
2:17
no, I'm good. You and you you just you don't ever need anything.
2:23
You so you so you so chill you like one of the like I
2:29
really like, I got this friend. Oh I'm gonna have I'm gonna get
2:31
you to do my favorite before you leave. Like, I really want you
2:35
to send her video and just say hey, she low really Oh. Her
2:40
name is Raquel. She saw you at the last prophetic un and she right
2:46
now. She lives in Tallahasseee Tallaha, Florida. I'm going to Florida in
2:53
March to preach. Oh okay, I'll close to me though, I'll be
2:57
in Fort Lauderdale. I think she probably will see the difference around it though,
3:01
yeah, she when I say she loves you, really she loves you.
3:06
You your message, Let's just change her. She was like, she's
3:09
so real and so transparent, and so I'm gonna get you to misfucker.
3:14
She loves And that's what I'm saying here, like with with with this,
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That's what I meant when I was an open book, Like no, nothing
3:22
is off limits to me. When I say I'm every woman, I really
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be meaning it, Like you know, every facet of a woman's life.
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I probably experienced thisself, maybe like a senior citizen, but I mean I'm
3:34
for real, Like I've been married, I've been divorced. You know what
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I'm saying. I'm a widow, I've been the other woman. I've been
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to every woman. You understand what I'm saying. So when I say I've
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been every woman, I really do mean that. And I'm an open book,
3:49
you know in that story. And and that's even me saying I'm the
3:52
other woman. It's something I never would say because I really see myself coined
3:58
like as a good girl, and I am. That don't mean I'm not
4:00
a good girl, but it's a so I found myself in a situation you
4:03
know, and it's just a it's a it's a testament that anybody, anybody,
4:09
it can happen to anybody. You can get lower enough. You know
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what I'm saying, You can, you know? And so that's why I'm
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the way that I am, because I realize that I don't care who you
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are. You know what I'm saying. Life beat you down enough, baby,
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you'll wake up and find yourself in spaces and places that you promise yourself
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you'll never be in. But when I say I'm every woman, I really
4:30
do mean that I'd have been a single mom. I'm serious single. I've
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been every woman, really and truly like only woman. I ain't being like
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I said the senior season woman, but here come on my way far from
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it. Listen. Okay, so I think we didn't press the record,
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but we in there. But I do not. I got an honor the
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woman God because she talking. And y'all, y'all may or may not know,
4:58
but if you know, you know, you in for a wonderful tree.
5:00
I know your TPC family, Finna just shut it down. We're gonna
5:03
have alerts all day on this pel be alerted up. Listen, welcome to
5:09
just ask the podcast where we create a safe space for influencers to decompress,
5:13
half fun and just ask. It's your girl, Jessica and Smith and does
5:15
a rays over there. She got the mic that they speak to the folks
5:18
des ray. She don't have a camera, but listen, we have none
5:24
other then Andrea Pastor let me I'm say pastor because that's the honor. But
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Pastor Andrea Gates. Some of the local somebody Burningham people might know her.
5:33
It's Lynn. I know y'all, but you know Lynn. You know if
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you know Lynn, you know her man. She's an author, I said,
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she's a pastor. She is a just a world now being like she
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she's talking about being a woman. She's that cheek like you are. You
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are literally that chik. I learned who you were through Coach d and she
6:00
you like she did and when she started Prophetic con you have been at every
6:06
prophetic un and I when I first experienced you, I was like, who
6:13
is this lady? Like who is this lady? Like where she come from?
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And then when I found out that you were from you were out of
6:23
Birmingham, I was like, how did how did I not know about this
6:26
lady? You? You lying. Okay, So if you ever experienced pastor
6:34
gays, you know what I'm talking about. If you haven't, you just
6:39
get in the room where she is and she gonna serve every day. Okay.
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This ain't no amp, It's the truth. Okay, thank you so
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much, thank you so much for coming on. And oh, let me
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not. I just disrespected her because des a rate her producer to shout out
6:54
to her lounge lou it's four of them on my platform. Y'all be talking,
7:02
y'all, y'all be talking. Okay, it's the best new girlfriend.
7:06
Listen. They get real okay, and I love the perspective on that platform.
7:12
So y'all if y'all not following her following that platform, y'all go ahead,
7:15
and we're gonna have that all linked up, because baby, it's all
7:17
and it's real on there, especially the police. She don't know. She
7:21
don't care what she's saying. Listen, how you how you feeling that?
7:27
I want to say, I said, miss past which one I'm gonna do?
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Which one? Which one? Call them? You know, I don't
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care. I ain't calling you a lien. I really don't care. I
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really don't care. For real, call a pastor Leen. No, no,
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I know, I really don't like this. I stead up pasting the
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link. I don't think Lynn knew that she was gonna be a pastor.
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She didn't she want it. I mean today that's very Listen, you carry
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a lot of hats. You you're in real estate, you're a creative,
7:58
you're an author. Congratulations on your new book. Can you talk to us
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a little bit back there? Like, you know, I hadn't personally read
8:05
the book yet, but I know it's really and it's not your first book
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yet. No, it wasn't. It's like number six, I think.
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Yeah, I've been writing for a while, but I Marked is about you
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know, I just finished the big project with our church of completing a new
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space that we and so I'd already started Mark, you know before that,
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but then like I couldn't finish it. And I understood why, because I
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had to put this experience of being a woman leading a church by myself,
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you know what I'm saying, and doing some very blueprint type things you know
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in the South being black, Yeah, you know what I'm saying, single
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all of that different stuff. So you know, it just coincided everything that
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I was talking about just there's a difference between being called and chosen. Chosen
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has a different mark on it. So when I say marked, that's what
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I'm talking about. In the life of a chosen person is often marked by
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a lot of trial, by a lot of warfare, you know what I'm
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saying, By a lot of rejection, you know, a lot of process,
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all that we find ourselves saying, like why my life got to be
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so hard? Yeah, you know, it's kind of like that. And
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so I just kind of walked through the things that God literally taught me on
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this walk, you know, and it's just like eight marked, eight things
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that being chosen has taught me. And that's true. It's true. And
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I mean literally in my office one day, God just said right, and
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I started writing and he said, number what I tell you, And when
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I got through, I will have eight things. And he said, okay,
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eight things being chosen has taught you. And that's how that came.
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I didn't even have marked. Then I got marked later when I started really
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realizing, like it's like you got a dagger, like a spot, like
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a target on your back. That's really so okay, let's tap into that
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a little bit because some people you know, we claim a lot of things
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like oh, I'm chosen on this on that. How does somebody really identify
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that they're chosen and how do they identify what they're chosen for? Well,
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I say this, this is this is me. This is the gospel of
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cording to Andrew. Now somebody else's, uh, this is the gospelinger Andrea
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book one chapter. But she a comedian like this to me. First of
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all, you always know there's something different about you. That's number one.
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Number two, you never fit. You never fit. You never fit.
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That's another thing we people say, I never fit in, you know,
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like y'all really do be fitting in. I'm talking about people who really don't
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fit in. You know, I'm talking about you in a crowded room.
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And it's when I say you don't fit in, don't mean that you eyeball
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out sitting off somewhere by yourselfie. That's not what I'm talking about. You
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can be in a space, but mentally you don't connect to the space,
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you know what I'm saying. So you know that is one thing. But
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being chosen, to me, is it's something that you're marked from birth.
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You know what I'm saying. It's like you set aside chosen by God,
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and it's you are a side. I love to use the word cycle breaker,
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really are. That's the thing that distinguishes you to me is that your
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call to break cycles in your bloodline. You know the patterns and when you
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are when you're called to do that, that means you're the first person to
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go through the matrix. You're the first person to create the opening. And
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if I'm the one that's creating the opening, I'm gonna get the most scars
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because I'm creating something that hasn't been created. I'm opening a porter that hasn't
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been opened. So what that means, I gotta figure out how big it
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need to be. I gotta figure out the circumference length and breadth of it.
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But my life figures that out. It's not about like measurements, natural
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measurements, but it's spiritual measurements. You know that other people after me will
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be able to go through, but they won't incur the same damage, scars,
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hurt, rejection. I am literally creating a space for other people.
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And the you know, and you say about being chosen, how do you
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know most times is what we don't talk about is you're chosen to snatch other
12:16
people out of what you survived? Whoa that that's it? Oh? Oh
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you whatever? That's whatever that is? It could be multiple things. So
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when we ask the questions like why me, you just literally answered the question
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is because you don't snatch somebody out of something you ain't been yourself out of
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or been experienced with God. And so at what point in your life,
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because you've been through a lot, like if I can, if I can
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remember, well, your grandparents raised you right, and so at what point
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we can go into your story a little bit, But at what point did
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you realize that I am chosen? And then when did you start to really
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embrace that? Because it's one thing to know you you chosen and another thing
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to just really embrace the fact of it. Because embracing embracing the trials,
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it ain't for the thing, and you ain't faint. I've been know knowing
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something and becoming aware is two different things, because you can know something and
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never admit what you know, but you can't be aware in not walking something.
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I've known for a very long time that I was chosen, So from
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a young, young, young, young child, I was always different.
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But becoming aware probably just a couple of years ago. I'm talking about two
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three maybe that if that, yeah, becoming aware, becoming because this is
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a thing. You can be chosen, you can know it, but when
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you become aware, you gotta settle in it. You have to settle in
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that this is who I am. I can't make any apologize apologies for it
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anymore, you know. And when I become aware, then that's where the
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decision comes for me to decide whether I'm gonna do this or I'm not.
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Because the moment you become aware, it becomes life and death. It don't
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become life and death really until you become aware. When you become aware,
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it becomes life and death. Then I gotta decide either I'm gonna live my
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life my way, average and mediocre and never fulfill anything for real, for
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real, because my fulfillment, because I'm marked, only comes from doing that
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which I was birth in the earth to do, which is my destiny,
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which is my calling, which is you know, my purpose. All of
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that, you know, but me being comfortable yesterday, but but being aware.
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I think by losing my husband brought another level of awareness that I that
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I didn't have before. Then I knew it, you know, but but
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his death brought a different level of awareness. That's yeah. And I honor
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you for your openness about the transition that you had with the look because listen,
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you was preaching the other you know, the other same day, and
15:22
you was talking about the Man of God was paying bills, and you didn't
15:24
know how to pay bills, like the Man of God took care of you
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like the same grace me say this, I knew how to pay them.
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I just hadn't paid them in our relationship. You didn't have to, Yeah,
15:35
because prior to you know, like I said, I did everything.
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You know what I'm saying. I knew, you know, but once I
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got into this relation, when I came into relationship, you know, and
15:45
we decided, oh we're gonna get married, it was a hey, you
15:48
know, I sold my house moved into his house because his thing is all
15:52
always was I needed things to be where I can take care of everything that
15:58
if something happen. So that's that's kind of how we started like that.
16:03
So you know, yeah, he set the tone station, man. I
16:07
mean, when I tell you he set the tone, he raised the bar.
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The bar is high. So yeah, coming for her yeah, don't
16:15
be coming for her. The bar is high. Okay, she made it
16:18
very clear on the platform and TPC ain't gonna, ain't gonna habit. They
16:22
are bodyguards in real life. Shout out to TPC the Purpose Churches from Mean
16:26
and Alabama. Look they crazy for real, like they your your tribe,
16:32
like with your partners, as you would say, they go ham for you.
16:37
But I don't want to I don't want to bypass this question because it's
16:40
so good. So as a as a single woman, I've never been married.
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I'm you know, I'm thirty two years old and I'm learning my purpose
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right, I'm learning like what God is calling me, and I'm starting to
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learn how to embrace that and being like you said the word a where So
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what advice would you have for women because we talked about you've been every woman,
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right, what advice do you have for women that are about to that
17:00
are that look to be married and their powerhouses themselves? Like because what like
17:06
it's a it seems like it's a difficult ddition. I had somebody, a
17:10
man, an older man, tell me that I couldn't walk in my calling
17:15
and be married. Yeah you can, because if you would look at the
17:18
Book of if you would look at Deborah, Deborah, if you look not
17:22
the Book of you look at Deborah, and it's God is so specific in
17:26
what he does. He doesn't do anything just to be doing it. He
17:32
makes sure that it is written that she was a Lappadoff's wife. That's so
17:38
good. It talks about her, and it said Lappadolph's wife. We don't
17:44
hear about him no more but it. But God wanted you to know that
17:48
she was somebody's wife. Not only was she somebody's wife, she was a
17:52
judge, she was a prophet, she was a strategist. Then we look
17:57
on down in the in the book, she was a psalmist. You see
18:00
her singing in worshiping, right. Yeah, so he he was letting you
18:06
know that to be at all it's possible. Okay, that's what I take
18:12
from that, you know. But it's it's like this, I'm pastor A.
18:18
But when I was married, when I came home, I wasn't past
18:21
the a, right, you know, I was Shawn's wife, right,
18:26
And so pastor a hat came off, Shawn's wife came on. Okay,
18:32
so you gotta know your role. You know what I'm saying, know what
18:34
you play. You know, I wasn't in the in the house pastor I'm
18:41
somebody again, because I think sometimes we especially as black women, Yeah,
18:45
sometimes we we're so used to being in the power mold because we do a
18:49
lot of things ourselves that we do not know the art of transition. Yeah.
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And then and you know, the myth is that we don't know how
18:57
to submith, you know. And that's a true you know. But I
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tell anybody you single your powerhouse. This is my thing. Now, master
19:07
individuality. I say that so much. Master individuality, because if you don't
19:12
master being an individual, being happy within yourself, satisfied within yourself, and
19:19
your happiness is not predicated on another individual. You don't need another individual to
19:25
make you happy. Like I tell people now, whoever gets me next gets
19:27
the best version of me. My happiness comes prepackaged. I don't need you
19:33
to make me happy. I come happy. You can add to my happiness.
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Okay, But that didn't happen overnight. It happened when I learned.
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But this is the crazy thing about it. I've been married twice. I
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was married once divorced. My second marriage, I lost my husband, all
19:48
right, Okay, so even though I've been married twice, it neither one
19:53
of those marriages that I enter them. Mastering individuality what gets me next,
20:00
gets the best version of me. Because my life has taught me some things.
20:04
My process, my pain has taught me some things. I grow,
20:08
I'm matured, I'm a totally different person. I know what master. I
20:12
lost enough now to know what priority is, what's important. You know what
20:17
I'm saying, And so I mastered individuality. I don't need anybody to complete
20:23
me. I'm coming home. I'm coming happy. You understand. And that's
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what I tell any single woman. Master individuality. Be happy by yourself.
20:36
You understand, and don't be saying, oh, somebody complete me. No,
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no one should complete you. You should be whole. They should be
20:41
whole. Y'all come together and make a whole thing. Yeah, right,
20:45
and that's really how it should be. But then also I would tell any
20:48
powerful woman, don't dim your life to make anybody else feel comfortable. You
20:52
know, whoever God has for you, he gonna be able to handle you.
20:57
He's going to be able to handle you. He's not going to be
21:00
jealous of you, you know. So that's one of your indicators, you
21:06
know, if you're coming over here trying to trying to turn my my watts
21:10
down on my light, I know you not the one. And that doesn't
21:14
mean that I don't know how to submit. That doesn't mean that I don't
21:17
know how to be quiet, That doesn't mean I don't know my role.
21:19
But if you showing up on the scene and you trying to minimize me,
21:25
that strike one, That strike one, you know. So that's what I
21:29
would say, master individuality, be happy within yourself, and do not dim
21:33
your life for anybody. That's so good. I'm very practical, and so
21:41
what are the steps that need to be taken to master the individuality? And
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how do you know that you've come to that point? I know that I've
21:52
come to that part point because I'm so happy by myself, Like not then
21:56
when I say by myself, I'm not when I'm not even thinking single,
22:00
I'm just talking about I'm happy with me. I wake up happy, And
22:06
it doesn't mean everything in my life is right. I just have a joy
22:10
that I've tapped into that's different than anything that I've ever experienced. I'm so
22:17
consistent, my mood so consistent. I don't care what goes on my mood
22:22
is so consistent. You know what I'm saying, And I think you can't
22:26
find mastered individuality has to be a byproduct of confidence. That's so good,
22:32
and confidence only comes from God. I can't give it to you. Nobody
22:34
else can give it to you. It comes from the presence and relationship and
22:38
exchange with God. He makes you comfortable with you. How does he do
22:42
that? Because He is the manufacturer. He knows who you are, what
22:47
he put in you, what is for, what's the purpose that it's supposed
22:49
to play out and accomplish. So that's what I say. Number one,
22:52
you can't do it. And I don't mean to be religious in churchy,
22:56
but I'm just being honest. You got to know who you are in God
23:00
first, because that's where your identity is. Identity found in anything else is
23:06
a huge mistake. God is the one who who identifies you. Become safe
23:11
in who you are. That's the number one thing. And it may take
23:15
counseling because practical, let's be practical. It may take counseling because a lot
23:18
of us have unhealed trauma. Yeah, a lot of us got stuff that
23:21
went on in our lives. Very few of our houses were houses that wasn't
23:26
dysfunctional. I don't even care if you had two parents. Yeah, there's
23:27
some dysfunction in every household. So you know, healing counseling. You know,
23:33
I tell anybody, if you got past trauma, you got stuff in
23:36
your life that you have not dealt with, deal with that because you can't
23:40
master the individuality with a bunch of with a bunch of weight and trash from
23:45
the past. You gotta get that out. So that would be the very
23:48
first thing that I say. And making sure that your relationship with God is
23:52
very solid now religion, relationship with God is very solid because from him it's
23:57
gonna come everything that has to do with your identity. You know, he
24:02
gonna make you okay with you, Right, He's going to make you okay
24:06
with you. And when he make you okay with you, out of that
24:08
burst individuality and knowing I'm powerful as an individual, I don't need anybody to
24:15
make me powerful. Now we can come together and be more powerful. Yeah,
24:21
but I understand the power that I stand in as an individual. I
24:25
understand as a single woman what I bring to the table. Yeah, and
24:29
I'm not just talking about money. I'm talking about my mind, because I'm
24:33
annoyed enough that if you give me anything, when I give it back to
24:36
you, it ain't gonna be like what you gave it. A law.
24:37
I know my mind is worth a million dollars if I didn't have no money
24:41
in the bank. You understand, that's what I know about me. When
24:45
I show up in your life, Ain't nothing in your life gonna be the
24:48
same. Your children ain't gonna be the same, Your mama ain't gonna be
24:51
the same. Ain't nothing gonna be the same. Because I understand who I
24:56
am. I am genuine my heart in TI. It's so puritu towards people,
25:02
man, I know, And I'm not finna get this to just anybody.
25:06
I work too hard to get here. I work too hard. I
25:08
work too hard to get here. So yeah, yeah, Standing who you
25:12
are unapologetically one thing about it. It will be a deterrent to who don't
25:18
need to be there, and it'll be a call to who's supposed to be
25:22
there. That's one thing about it. That confidence shields you. That's what
25:27
we don't realize. Wait wait, no, no, no, no,
25:29
no, pass please please please wait wait wait you're taking a fast You're taking
25:34
this like we whoa she said, confidence is the she it does. So
25:47
when we when we people are like, oh you stuck up? Are you
25:48
full of yourself? No, I'm confident because you don't understand. I am
25:52
aware. I'm aware of who I am. And when you become aware of
26:00
awareness is a journey. You don't just arrive there in one day. Awareness
26:04
come from pain, process, rejection, failure, You went through success,
26:11
wins, losses. It comes from so many different things. So when I
26:15
arrived at being aware, I'm not finna. Let you take that away from
26:19
me. You know what I'm saying. I know why, Mike, No
26:23
not. I really know who I am now, I really know who I
26:30
am, and I'm a whole blessing and I'm not finna let anybody minimize that.
26:33
And that ain't gotten to do with looks. That ain't gottenhing to do
26:37
with all of this superficial stuff. I'm talking about the posture of my heart,
26:44
the intent of my heart. Not everything else is extra, and we
26:48
thank God for the extra. Could listen, right, don't we? Right?
26:51
Yeah, we thank God for that extra you know, let's be real,
26:53
we want that extra holy news, you know. But the most important
26:59
thing is being a war or who y'ah. Confidence does one or two things.
27:03
It attracts or the real detracts. Yeah, what I'm saying because some
27:07
people cocky. No, I'm not cocky. I know for sure, I'm
27:11
not cocky. I'm just aware, you know. And if you bothered by
27:15
it, then you're not my person. It's just as simple, you're not
27:18
my person, right man. Yeah, So that's all before Desert started talking
27:25
this is her pastor, this this desil Ray pastor, and uh, yeah,
27:30
I'm gonna leave it at that. I'm just gonna say, like,
27:33
self awareness, it's a journey, right, and and sometimes you don't realize
27:40
where you are or how far are you coming to you coming to certain situations,
27:45
right. And so literally, just this week, I had one of
27:48
my little clients. She's eleven, right, So she comes in. I
27:51
was like, how's your day. She's like it's okay. I'm like,
27:53
what made it okay? Versus a great day? You know, I'm always
27:56
like a great day. She's like, oh, you know, just drama.
28:00
And I was like, what kind of drummer? You got into sixth
28:00
grade? What's going on? So then she said something about her boyfriend.
28:04
No, I mentioned something about her boyfriend. Right, She's like, well,
28:07
when you're gonna get a boyfriend? And I was like, when the
28:10
Lord sent him? And she was like, that's all you talk about.
28:12
And I was like, what you mean, Jesus, that's all you talk
28:18
about. And before I would have been like, oh man, you know,
28:22
like, oh I don't want to be talking about Jesus too much,
28:23
like you don't want to offend nobody, even though she's just eleven. But
28:26
I was like, yeah, I mean that's I love the Lord, like
28:30
you know. So then I was like I just started to tell us like
28:33
I really asked him and incorporate him in everything that I do, Like I
28:36
ask him questions, you know, like what we wearing today, you know,
28:38
should I talk to this person x Y? And she's like, oh
28:41
okay. I said yeah, so next time you and your little boyfriend or
28:45
you and your friends or whatever it is, just ask the Lord what you
28:48
should do about it. So for me, that just showed me I'm a
28:52
better level of confidence that I'm stepping into with myself and who I am and
28:56
who I am and God like even though she was only eleven, you know
28:59
what I'm saying. But still he made he gave me the opportunity to really
29:00
be able to show me me at that moment. So good, that's good.
29:07
What I heard you just say too, though, in correlation to what
29:11
you just said is we're talking about womanhood. Right. There is a sacrifice
29:21
that we have to make and a decision that mainly the decision to make to
29:25
live a consecrated life, and a consecrated life creates the confidence of God.
29:32
And let me ask you this, as a woman, what do you think
29:38
keeps us from that consecrated life to so that we can build confidence in God?
29:45
Because many times when it comes to God, we sometimes focus too much
29:52
on what we're giving up and not on what we gain. And that's just
29:56
the truth. Anything that you can not be consistent about anything, whether it's
30:03
exercising, whether he's eating right, whether it's God, whether it's don't call
30:07
that man no more, whatever it is that you can't be consistent about,
30:11
you're struggling with consistency because what you're giving up looks like more than what you're
30:17
gonna gain. And until you see God as a greater gain, you're not
30:25
gonna live a consecrated life, right, Because a consecrated life has to be
30:30
a choice followed by corresponding actions right that keep you consecrated. Because you don't
30:37
just wake up and be consecrated. You know, there's things you have to
30:40
put in place to remain consecrated. Everything with God is maintenance, right,
30:45
So you gotta be consistent. So there's with anything. If I can't do
30:48
something, or if I can't be consistent in exercising, it's because I have
30:53
you not yet got the revelation that me giving up helps me gain more.
31:00
This is so right. I'm too busy thinking about because I can't eat chicken.
31:03
I'm too busy thinking about, oh I got to get up early.
31:07
I'm too busy thinking about what I'm giving up versus what I'm gaining. And
31:11
until what I'm gaining in my mind out weighs what I'm giving up, I'm
31:17
never gonna live that kind of life. This is so good. And I
31:19
got a good example for that because literally I just told Desiree, I shuit
31:23
this with you. So at the end of last year, I told the
31:26
Lord I wasn't gonna do two things right. I said, Okay, God,
31:29
I'm gonna sbmit these two things to you. One of the things was
31:33
drinking, right, It's not like I, you know, was out just
31:36
so drunk or whatever like that. But I love a little good wine winking
31:41
out from all these on point. You know what I'm saying, Marlowe,
31:44
It's my drink. Okay, I got it. Okay, But this year
31:48
I was speaking with a friend and she told me, just make the decision,
31:52
right, and I was that I was scared to make the decisions.
31:56
I felt like I was losing already, like I was the black sheep.
31:59
I didn't have friends. You know, I've always been having to compete for
32:02
people to stay with me, you know what I'm saying. And so I
32:07
was just like, you know, I was conforming to others versus making people
32:13
inspired, like inspiring people to just live a life of Christ, you know
32:16
what I'm saying. So I was kind of tee of tottering, and so
32:21
I just I made the decision last year when I told my accountability, I
32:24
was like, hey, I'm not gonna be drinking this year. And I
32:28
told gave them the other things and they were like, okay, supportive.
32:32
Right. So last night I went to a gathering and celebrating. Of course
32:38
they had they had that stuck. You know what I'm saying, they had
32:43
that stuff, and uh, you know, I'm a brown girl and they
32:46
had a lot of brown you know, and so and if y'all judging me,
32:51
go talk to your mama. But they had that, and normally I'm
32:57
I'm reactive to it, right my response see it, you know, because
33:00
I don't I know how to manage it. But even though I know how
33:04
to management, my commitment to God will outweigh the fact that I knew what
33:09
I could manage. And so it literally did not bother me to just say
33:15
often to make me some mix me some strawberry lemonade from simply simply something simply
33:21
made and some sprite. It was so good. I enjoyed my little rotail
33:25
dip and everything with a non alcoholic beverage. And I left there and I
33:30
called des Ray and I was like, man, I'm so proud of me.
33:36
And that was probably the greatest reward because for one, nobody pressured me.
33:42
And when we think about it, when we make a decision on something,
33:45
you really don't feel pressure because it was your decision and you stand on
33:47
You stand on your decision. And a lot of times we think that pure
33:52
pressure is pure pressure. You can't pure pressure me into something I didn't decided
33:55
right, I'd have decided not to drink, So I can't either you either,
34:00
you come with me. Like my friends with my birthday, there was
34:02
like, oh, she ain't getting she ain't getting none to drink. She
34:06
ain't get none of like you need people like that and people will support the
34:08
decision that you make instead of saying why you ain't drinking, why you ain't
34:13
this? It was It's something that I'm doing with God. And I felt
34:15
God's approval and joy of me in that moment because I was aware of something
34:21
that it was like it was evil. Oh my god, it was so
34:24
easy to do something I thought that would be so hard. Now it's been
34:28
hard, like when I've had my damn moments like oh I just need Oh
34:31
I didn't need me a glass of wine and watch me some scandal or something
34:35
like that. But no, it's pushed me into Okay, God, what
34:37
are you trying to tell me in this moment? And I've seen in twenty
34:42
four ain't even really started yet and I'm seeing this change. So to your
34:45
point, man, we got to make the decision. We have to be
34:51
followed with proper corresponding action, because if it's not followed with proper corresponding action,
34:57
it's not a decision. It's just a statement. It doesn't become a
35:01
decision until you put the proper action with it. That that makes the change
35:07
come, that makes the decision a decision. Decision is deciding, which means
35:14
I'm separating myself from something into something else. So if I don't fully separate,
35:19
I really hadn't made a decision. I just said something that sounded good
35:29
because I ain't given no more exam But I mean that's good because I'm saying
35:34
you said it, you made it. What I'm saying is it was a
35:37
valid decision because you walked it out. No, it wouldn't have been a
35:42
decision if you hadn't walked it out. It just would have been some good
35:45
that you had said. You're making it plain because listen, because there's some
35:50
more decisions I gotta make. Yeah that that has proper actions. Listen.
35:53
Yeah, I get it, me too, me too. And this is
35:58
what I love about you. This is what I love about you. You
36:00
you don't just keep it real, but you're so transparent to the point where
36:05
it's like so freeing and so I'm gonna get Tona. I'm gonna get to
36:08
this because I know when I was gonna tell you this, but lord,
36:12
I'm gonna get to this. No, it's not. It's good because what
36:15
I do is I research people when I watch, I really watch. I've
36:19
been watching you and I just told them. Okay, okay, y'all,
36:28
I'm not with you. That was lying, y'all, that was lyin.
36:31
But I tell you, flesh and blood like she's a pastor, y'all.
36:44
Like so, I don't know, y'all pass maybe they too stuck over there,
36:46
but but she's a person's and tell you listen, this is what I'm
36:51
getting it. She tell y'all at the Purpose Church that she she is a
36:53
whole human being. You are not gonna try her. Okay. One thing
36:57
I observed about you and going to visiting your services, and if y'all in
37:01
Birmingham, please feel free do yourself a favor. Okay, it's ten am.
37:07
They pray, they start praying and stuff like that, and they thank
37:09
you for being being timely and your pastors. Please do not have your folks
37:15
in church all day. Okay, thank you anyway, God Lee. But
37:22
anyway, so one of the things I've noticed. I've been able to visit
37:24
your church twice basically, and one of the pattern that I see is that
37:30
you you are y'all are consistently TPC. And what I mean by that is
37:37
sometimes as leaders, we can negate the people that have committed to the to
37:44
the program, committed to the organization, and focus so much on getting more.
37:52
I see the obviously with you, like you real deal are like,
37:57
hey, partners, this is a partner. If your partners stand up to
38:00
say this, if you are partner, you are heavily heavy on the partner.
38:06
And if you're a partner, then you get the poor almost spoken to
38:07
them. So I know this guy, you get the benefit of being a
38:12
partner, so you don't negate fellowship and with the business. Because I felt
38:16
good. I always feel good, you know, coming in the doors of
38:20
TPC. But how did you, as a leader, especially a pastor,
38:23
how did you learn how to appreciate and and and guard and with uphold the
38:30
partners and show love to the visitors because sometimes folks be missing, like they
38:36
be so oh the visitors this, and the visitors of that, and then
38:37
it'd be something else when you go into partnership. But what I see in
38:40
what Desiree has shared with me is that the part how you invested in the
38:45
partnership was the reason why she converted. Wow, Okay, I didn't know
38:50
that I told that with me. But really what I'm doing is, you
38:53
know, before our pastor, I was a leader, m So I'm appreciating
38:59
the me that wasn't appreciated in seasons that I served other leaders. That's really
39:05
what I'm doing. So you know that's why some things that show up in
39:08
my church, I know it ain't my harvest because I know what kind of
39:12
serving I was, and I know how my heart was towards the people that
39:15
I served when I was serving them. So when I see something foreign show
39:20
up, I know that don't belong to me. That ain't my harvest because
39:22
when I served, I served, I didn't desire platform. You know what
39:27
I'm saying. I showed up. I didn't have to be in front,
39:30
you know what I mean. I worked the background, I did whatever.
39:34
You know, I cleaned bathrooms, I did whatever. Nobody even knew half
39:37
of the time that I cleaned. I remember my pastor showing up one time
39:38
early didn't know that I came early to clean up the bathroom. They know
39:43
how it was being done. I was doing it. I'm just saying,
39:46
you know what I'm saying. So I appreciate the me that wasn't appreciated in
39:52
past seasons when I served. So you know, that's why I'm so heavy
39:57
on partnership. You know, I love new people. Of course, we
40:00
want new people. Of course, God sending people. I love my visitors,
40:02
but my partners are invested in my vision, and anybody that invests should
40:09
be given a greater portion. All right, now when you come in,
40:14
you know, because I've even gotten to the point now and this is a
40:15
new thing that I do. I don't counsel unless you're a partner. You
40:20
know, I used to, you know, will talk to people da da
40:22
da da da da dad here and there because I'm just not going to speak
40:28
in jurisdictions that haven't been given to me because I've just learned to just be
40:32
safe. You know, I'm not gonna talk to nobody else's cheap. I'm
40:37
not gonna talk to nobody else who flow them in between people. And it's
40:40
not that I'm not I won't talk to anybody, but I said, I'm
40:45
finna really protect myself, you know, protect myself, and I'm not going
40:52
to let everybody outside the foe drain me that when people in the foe need
40:58
me, I got nothing for them. And so that's why I'm so heavy
41:01
on that. There's a huge difference. A visitor is a visitor, they're
41:06
shopping, but partners have invested in me, and so I invest in them.
41:12
Man, you you just freed a lot of leaders with what you just
41:16
said. You also said something that I want to highlight that you appreciate the
41:29
portion of you that was unappreciated. And we call we we call this church
41:36
heard thing. It's real, It's very it is real, and so to
41:40
the person because I was I was once. I literally just found my tribe.
41:45
Okay, I literally I think I've been not even a full year yet.
41:49
Shout out to PG, sat out to PC. I love y'all,
41:52
y'all my people. I literally just found my tribe. But it was I
41:58
was telling people, I'm I'm not doing this church thing. I w PK.
42:00
I said, I'm not feinna w church. Oh okay, shout out
42:05
to my Diddy. I love my Diddy, But I said I wasn't doing
42:10
this church thing, no more like because the last one hurt me to my
42:15
core. I get it because the same way you said you was out scrubbing
42:20
toilets and stuff I can identify. And I want somebody to line and say
42:23
I didn't. I want somebody to line and say I didn't, okay,
42:28
because I got receipts. Okay, but it's not I'm here from that.
42:31
But I'm just saying, like I was broken. So I'm broken that I
42:37
couldn't see beyond the church and just didn't understand that my assignment was up where
42:44
I was. And so like, what do you say to people that have
42:49
experienced how do they get beyond that point? Never confuse people with God,
42:54
And that's what we make mistake at. You know, sometimes we find God
43:00
through people that claim they know him or serve him, and that's what we
43:05
miss up at, you know. And we're human, so you know,
43:07
even as leaders, you know, we make mistakes. You know what I'm
43:12
saying, We do things wrong, we miss God, you know, and
43:15
all of that kind of stuff. You know. And it's funny because we're
43:20
coming off the heels that doesn't coud tell you this off the heels of a
43:22
great leadership meeting today, and I hammer hammer, hammer, hammer hammer.
43:29
I'm not gonna let you make me a celebrity. I'm not gonna let you
43:32
make me your God. Even when people come to this church and I sense
43:37
that what they've about is trying to get close to me, I pray them
43:40
away. You know why, because I should not be your object of affection.
43:45
God should be okay, So I know how dangerous that is. Okay,
43:52
And I believe this. Every leader needs a Nathan. Every leader needs
43:58
a Nathan. Every leader needs a Nathan. Every leader needs somebody that smelled
44:05
like sheep that they can hear from. I will stand on that till my
44:08
dieing day. And I know people say I don't counsel down, I don't
44:14
listen. When you become a leader, your viewpoint changes. Yeah, all
44:19
right, you see from leader of you, you don't see from sheep view.
44:22
And you need to have somebody that's in the fold that you know,
44:30
got your back, your heart and you can hear from. You know what
44:34
I'm saying. But I would say this, don't give up on God because
44:37
somebody that said they love God mistreated you. You know what I'm saying.
44:40
That's number one. You know, and the Bible says, I will give
44:45
you a pastor that's personal. Don't let your pastor be because that's your mama
44:50
pastor because that's where you've been all your life, or because that's some familiar
44:53
place. Let God give you a pastor. You know what I'm saying.
44:59
Don't you you choose your Don't you even choose your own past? That's so
45:01
good? You know you let God leave you. And that don't mean that
45:06
that past won't ever hurt you. That don't mean that that pastor won't ever
45:08
disappoint you. But God will reveal the heart of your leader to you.
45:14
I tell everybody, don't follow me if God has not given, has not
45:20
shown you my heart right, because that's the thing, that's the thing that
45:27
sets us apart. I may not do everything right, but when you get
45:30
a revelation that the intent of my heart is pure, you'll be able to
45:34
rock with me when my method may not be the best, because you know
45:37
my heart, and my heart has been proven to you time and time and
45:42
time and time and time again. You know. But then we as leaders.
45:46
You know when I say leaders, because I am one. Even though
45:49
I don't do this, we can be abusive. We could take on a
45:52
ship, you know, we could be the Moses that hit the rock instead
45:57
of spoke to the rock. Moses hit the rock because that moment, Moses
46:00
took ownership of what didn't belong them. And he thought, oh, because
46:05
I keep standing in the gap for y'all, God would have been got y'all
46:07
if I hadn't have been praying and asking God. Then I know that's how
46:10
he was. He was tired, he was irritated, he was frustrated,
46:15
but he forgot these people are not yours. I just gave you stewardship over
46:19
them, and that's what we have to do as leaders. But I will
46:22
say, don't leave God because of people. And you may have to take
46:24
a breakaway. I know people don't want to tell you that, but you
46:28
may have to take a breakaway and reassess. And you got to also admit
46:32
where you went wrong at because if somebody hurt you that bad, there's probably
46:37
a level of access you granted that you never should have granted. So you
46:42
just gotta be careful. And one thing about God wanted always comes, and
46:46
we cannot let our love for people override God's voice. He'll be telling us
46:51
don't. Don't do that. But we can love people so much. The
46:54
Bible said love hides a multitude or faults, and it's only when we fall
47:00
out of love that we see clearly sometimes. And so we have to be
47:05
careful that we let God be the one who gods us when we're moving at
47:10
the pace of our heart, right, because most servants have huge hearts.
47:15
Man, and you have to watch that you don't let somebody abuse your heart.
47:21
You know what I'm saying because of who you are and you know what
47:23
you do and the level of service that you get. So yeah, I
47:27
will say, take a break, let God heal you, and then ask
47:30
God to show you your pastor everybody needs ask God to show you your pastor
47:37
everybody you brought something up of the heart and all of a sudden to go
47:40
somewhere. But I'm gonna bring this up. The Bible talks about guarding your
47:45
heart. How do you know when you're guarding your heart versus having a wall
47:49
up? M that's a thing line. That's a very very very very thing
47:55
line. Like for instance, my best friend who now my best friend.
48:00
Prior to her, I was done with friendship. I was done with friendship.
48:05
God had to tell me that was my friend, because he knew if
48:09
he didn't tell me, I wasn't going to ever open myself up to be
48:12
friends with nobody ever gain all right, And I remember vividly, this is
48:15
before we became me and Paula, before we became the love of friends that
48:19
we are. I was going to do a retreat for her. We knew
48:22
each other, you know, from school miles and then we just knew each
48:24
other. We had a lot of mutual friends and stuff, and so we
48:29
knew each other, but we wasn't friends like that. And I was going
48:31
to do a retreat for her. And on my way to retreat, I
48:34
remember I was getting out of the car my older sister, and I heard
48:37
the Lord say, that's your friend. I looked at my older sister and
48:40
I said, the Lord just told me that she was my friend. He
48:44
knew he had to tell me because I never would have opened my heart.
48:49
Let God lead you to people. You can't be led by your heart,
48:53
because sometimes your heart made decisions that your head should have made. Not your
48:59
heart is how we end up in relationships that we should be because we heart
49:02
motivated. Your heart is the place you think feel and choose. All right,
49:07
that's the place you think feeling choose from. And you gotta put your
49:09
head in there because your hair sees the bigger picture. Okay. So I
49:14
say that let God be your guide and let peace. My old passage to
49:19
say that let peace be your God. If you got any inkling inside of
49:24
you where your peace ain't completely sure, don't do it. Let your peace
49:30
be you God. That's the thing, and God will tell you that's your
49:32
person. Sometimes God will tell you people your person that you like. Ugh
49:38
you, But this is the problem. We think we gotta like everybody that
49:42
we get a deposit from my God. Everybody that God called me to get
49:45
a deposit from ain't necessarily somebody I gotta like or be friends with, but
49:50
they may have something inside of them that I need to take me to the
49:52
next level. I always ask people, what if God put what you needed
49:55
inside of a person you don't like, and you will miss it because you're
50:00
too busy, clouded by the person's personality that you can't tap into what they
50:07
got, and that can get you where you need to go. Because everybody
50:09
in a friendship something's just an exchange and move on. And sometimes that's what
50:15
we do. We try to make relationships out of exchanges. There's a difference.
50:20
So I say that, just let God be your guid. That's how
50:23
you're gonna know, because sometimes God gonna have to ease you into stuff,
50:29
you know what I mean. And you're gonna have to take baby steps,
50:30
especially when you've been hurt a lot. Yeah, you're gonna have to take
50:34
baby steps and people who enter your life, Consistency is the thing. Look
50:40
for. Consistency. That's the mark of God. Right now, my God,
50:45
it's consistency. Consistency, consistency. Consistency is that person consistent, right,
50:54
And that's the most important thing. I would say, I don't know
50:59
that. No, it answered that question. Like I feel like I'm at
51:05
a buffet, Like with this whole conversation is like a buffet. So I
51:09
do want to go here because you it's a lot of parts that you have
51:15
said that it's going to get me to my next question. And with you
51:20
being an open book, I think this is a safe space. We pride
51:22
ourselves on being a safe space because people really deal with things and they haven't
51:27
addressed it. And so I know that in building the church, congratulations,
51:30
like for when I knew that that was a whole process, a whole process.
51:37
I loved it. When you, you know, your whole idea about
51:39
raising one hundred dollars for the chairs, I just loved it. I just
51:44
enjoyed watching your process. A part of your process of building this building allowed
51:52
a level of healing with you and your father. Can you expound on that
51:57
and what that has done for you? And because he was sitting right in
52:00
the front, Pep, you don't understand. You don't understand that I'm sitting
52:05
right here with you, and I am forty seven years old, all right,
52:09
And it never in my life has Andrew, who I'm named after,
52:14
Andrea, ever showed up for me in the capacity that he has shown up
52:19
for me in this last year. You know, I was raised by my
52:22
grandparents. You know those you know my story. My mom died when I
52:25
was six months old. My mom and dad were married when my mom died,
52:30
my sister was four, I was six months. My dad was young
52:35
twenty four. My mom was twenty four when she died, and so my
52:37
grandparents got custody, you know, took custody of us or whatever. So
52:42
I always knew my dad, my dad always you know, came around here
52:45
and there, but it was never what I want. You got to understand,
52:47
I'm a young girl who has no memory of her mom, nothing but
52:52
what people are telling me. So everything about my mom has been pieced together
52:55
conversations from people who knew her all right. So the person that I formed
53:00
in my mind of who my mom is, none of it came from me.
53:04
All of it came from pieces of what somebody else said or their experiences.
53:07
So, you know, me not having my mom, I loaned even
53:10
the more for this type of relationship with my dad. And it's so funny
53:15
because I'm so much like my dad, so none shalant, so so like
53:20
whatever was so chill, that's my dad all day long. Okay, but
53:25
yeah, it's I don't know what happened, Like it's it's crazy, and
53:30
it's because of the proximity of the church is nowhere from him, and he
53:36
just starts showing up. Wow, throughout the whole process, I wouldn't even
53:40
be there. And so like, your daddy came out today, Your daddy
53:44
came out today, And I'm just like, I want you to understand.
53:47
Let me, let me, let me say this, Fir I say that
53:51
I did not want to be where we are because it's too close in proximity
53:55
to everything that tried to break me. I grew up literally right down the
54:00
street. I did not want to be there. I did not want to
54:02
be in that zip code. I did not want to be back out there,
54:05
all right. I did everything to try out to be out there.
54:07
I looked for laying everywhere the bill okay, But then my realtor call and
54:13
was like, hey, look at this building that it went out there.
54:15
I knew it was the building when I walked at it, even though I
54:17
was just like, OK, let's begin there. So God takes me back
54:24
wow, all right? And so I end up just right down the street
54:29
literally from where my dad lives. So he just started coming every day throughout
54:35
the whole entire process, just showing up, just showing up. I want
54:38
you to know, my dad never heard me preach, wow, never heard
54:42
me sing, never heard me do nothing I do until now. I really
54:47
wish I could sit down and ask him, like, what do you think
54:51
sitting over there watching me? What's going? I would love to get in
54:53
his head, like what you know? And the way he has shown up
54:59
for me the consistency, the checking on me, calling and see you know.
55:05
And what people don't know now is we really all each other have.
55:07
My older sister is gone, my younger sister's gone. It's just me.
55:12
I'm the only one left, all right. So it's like we have all
55:15
we we all we got. You know what I mean. And I'm trying
55:20
to tell you it's amaze easy how this has transpired, which has everything to
55:28
do when I say to you, whoever gets me next gets a different version
55:32
of me, right because every other version of me, the little girl was
55:37
never healed that part. And I love that you said that, because there
55:42
is where I want to go, because a lot of people don't realize they
55:45
lead from the little girl or the little boy versus leading from where they are.
55:49
So now it's it's like you feel different because a part of you that
55:52
has always been broken is not now he'll I don't need validation from you.
55:58
I got my eye now, only gonna have my heavenly father. What you
56:00
had understanding but for God to provide you healing on this side with your father.
56:06
And it's not that I would didn't It's not that I hadn't healed some
56:10
but it's not until sometimes something show up that you realized that what you thought
56:17
you was completely over, you really not right. And I started seeing the
56:23
giddiness when I would get the calls that said, your dad here. I
56:30
started seeing the who else. My shoulders started stretching out, my chest started
56:37
going out, because everybody in this world can call me great, but my
56:44
daddy think I'm great, right, And it's something about the affirmation of a
56:49
father and a child's life that just sets a different presence. It's the thing
56:55
just I didn't even know I needed. It's the thing forty seven that I
57:01
didn't even know I needed. My struggle with even receiving love in relationships was
57:08
connected to because I had taught myself that I ain't need certain things. I
57:15
taught myself that what was normal what was I taught myself, but what was
57:22
abnormal was normal. So I always struggle with affection, you know, because
57:27
I talked myself, I don't need that, I don't need no other because
57:30
I didn't have it. And sometimes what we grow up with a deficity in
57:36
we teach ourself to live without it. But that don't mean it's normal,
57:42
right, And I just said in the leadership meeting today. I said,
57:45
I'm trying to tell y'all when I get married the next time, baby,
57:47
he gonna be tired of me, and that's gonna be a new thing that
57:50
ain't never happened. I always be like, no, I'm gonna be like,
57:54
come in, cause I'm different. There's a part of me that I
58:00
I didn't even know that needed to be finished because I had so learned how
58:06
to live without it that when it showed up and healing started happening so organically,
58:15
like you know, right then he joined the church then, but he
58:20
commented, I want to be a partner was his exact words. I want
58:23
to be a partner. I want to be a partner, you know.
58:28
And I was like, okay, He's like, I got to figure out
58:30
what I want to do and what I want. Y'all don't understand, y'all
58:35
do not understand, Like this is crazy. And the process that I went
58:42
through with this renovation project was h E dobo L. But I tell people
58:49
the glory I did not know at the end of it, something that I
58:54
was in the tent and was laughing about, like Sarah, that I had
58:59
changed my petition. I wasn't even asking God for that no more. Wow,
59:04
right, I need you to understand the relationship I desired with my dadd
59:07
It wasn't even in my prayer request no more. I took that out.
59:10
I was in the tent, right, I'm laughing, like whatever, I
59:15
don't even need that no more. I had taught myself that I didn't need
59:17
that no more. But at the end of this process, all the hell
59:22
I went through to walk into that, that was like payback recompense, you
59:30
know what I'm saying. And so, yeah, I didn't even know I
59:32
needed it. I didn't even know that I needed it. And I said
59:38
to my dad, you know, the way you have shown up for me
59:44
is here places in me. It has, it has, It has been
59:51
the most powerful experience it has. It has. Yeah, I've always loved
59:59
him always. I've always had a great love for him, so, you
1:00:04
know, and just for him to be it's crazy, man. We talked
1:00:08
so much, you know, and just it's just crazy. It shows how
1:00:13
strong you are because you had to be willing oh yeah at some point to
1:00:17
say okay, God, I see what you're doing and be vulnerable. That
1:00:22
vulnerability piece for strong people like they're like, hey, this is freeing me
1:00:29
think about just I lost so much. When you lose, when you take
1:00:34
the losses that I've taken, you understand what matters. And so when my
1:00:40
dad showed up, I had all. I had already experienced one of the
1:00:45
greatest sparre as many losses, but the greatest loss, you know, that
1:00:51
I had ever experienced. And it changed me. It changed my whole perspective
1:00:55
on life. I'm in a it don't matter because it just don't matter.
1:01:00
So he showed up right in that space. Well, every other time that
1:01:05
you never showed up, or every other time you told me you was coming
1:01:08
and you didn't show up. Every time I sat out on the porch with
1:01:12
my bag packed and waited for you and you never came. My Grandma would
1:01:15
come outside and say he ain't coming, and I would be like, yes
1:01:16
he is, Yes he is, and she shut the door and she wouldn't
1:01:21
argue. She come back it and got dark. Now you still ain't came,
1:01:23
You still ain't called, you ain't said nothing. None of that mattered.
1:01:28
None of that mattered, because at this season, when I needed you,
1:01:32
you showed up, and it was pay for every time you did.
1:01:38
And I ain't even going to remind you about when you come, because it
1:01:42
really don't matter. It does not matter. It don't it don't, it
1:01:47
don't matter. I'm seizing these moments because I understand how precious moments are and
1:01:57
sometime we can get so caught up in stuff that don't matter and miss moments.
1:02:02
And I'm not doing that anymore. I'm not doing that anymore. I'm
1:02:08
not man you. You just I could sit here and just like talk to
1:02:15
you all day, I really could. Like this is such a reward just
1:02:21
to be able just to kind of like communicate with you in this way,
1:02:22
because it's like, y'all know we're on the platform in front of these cameras,
1:02:27
but it's just like just you, like you so dope, Like thank
1:02:31
you, You're so dope, and just like you free a lot of just
1:02:36
your presence freeze a lot of people, but especially a lot of women,
1:02:38
because women of your caliber, like women of your status a pastor entrepreneur,
1:02:45
you're doing multiple things, you're excelling in multiple things and areas, and to
1:02:50
be so rounded and you can come back down and just say, hey,
1:02:53
let me have this conversation and you have a hard I've been this, I've
1:02:57
been there. I've been there, I've been broken and I'm still going through
1:03:00
here and I'm still experiencing this and you can talk about it and you work
1:03:06
towards talking about it freely like that. That's that's that's the motivation that somebody
1:03:10
like me, I know dees At really appreciates you, because baby, we
1:03:13
talk about you all the time, like you just you're You're the reward.
1:03:17
Oh man, that's powerful. You are the reward. And I just I
1:03:22
like to speak that and let you know that every encounter that I've had with
1:03:27
you, yep, who couldn't who cutting onions? Mm hmmm no not today,
1:03:38
I know, like she didn't reverse psychology on the show, like but
1:03:45
she got that that's your annoying. But like literally anytime I experienced you,
1:03:52
Wow, it's the answer that I need. And I just want to thank
1:03:58
you man, Like you don't past, but you you have amazing past.
1:04:09
Man, But you they regard you. They you know, they can't wait
1:04:13
to meet you. So we got to make sure they have. But you
1:04:18
so you that ship man, And I'm very much, I very much so
1:04:24
look up to you. I have to say that very loud, and I'm
1:04:29
proud to say that I'm grateful to have encountered you on this side, and
1:04:33
so God, I want to say thank you, but I also want to
1:04:38
give you a moment. I give people a last thought moment. And so
1:04:44
if you had a final thought, if you had one thing to leave with
1:04:46
the listeners, what would it be. I mean, I'm telling why you're
1:04:50
talking to you. You're a little listening to me. You are the reward.
1:04:54
This is what I'm hearing. Don't let any hurt on anything you've experienced
1:04:59
in your past stop you from allowing somebody else to experience the blessing of you.
1:05:05
You know when I said I'm a whole blessing, Yeah right, you
1:05:10
know, and that I say that to you, whoever listening. You are
1:05:15
a whole blessing. And it is wrong for you to withhel some withhold somebody
1:05:21
from the experience of you, whether it be relationship, whether it be church
1:05:27
membership, whether it be friendship. You know, it's the plan and the
1:05:30
plot of the enemy to stop you from forming ships, because whenever you form
1:05:35
a ship, people's lives are elevated to another level because they experience the blessing
1:05:42
of who you are. So I would tell all the listeners and you,
1:05:45
no matter what kind of hurt you've experienced, don't allow it to keep you
1:05:51
from allowing the person that God has a sign or persons that God is assigned
1:05:57
to your life to experience the bless Let's see of who you are amazing.
1:06:03
I want to thank you so much for your presence on this platform. This
1:06:09
cannot be the last time. I just feel like there's more because I know
1:06:14
you're gonna be doing a lot of things and you you're forever welcome here,
1:06:17
like forever welcome here, y'all. I hope, I hope y'all will judy
1:06:23
because baby, that's it. This with today, that's it. And so
1:06:28
we think you're gonna follow her like she gave you enough to go follow her.
1:06:31
Go get the book mark is out right now. Okay, we're gonna
1:06:36
make sure we linked that. Baby. Maybe if you in Birmingham on a
1:06:41
Sunday, come on at the ten a m. The Purpose Church is where
1:06:45
you might want to be because I can't say you because my church too is
1:06:49
all this. So whatever you do, this is a great option. TPC.
1:06:55
I love TPC. You're gonna get a good word, good prayer,
1:06:58
you gonna go home and be able to eat by twelve. Okay, y'all,
1:07:01
thank you so much. Pass the gates until next week. Remember light
1:07:08
could be much more simple if you just ask. See you later. Hey,
1:07:16
y'all, thank you for listening to just ask. If you enjoyed this
1:07:20
experience, be sure to like coming and rate so others can find the show.
1:07:26
If you'd like to stay connected with me, feel free to follow me
1:07:29
at the Jessica Smith on all platforms. Again, I'm your girl, Jess
1:07:34
Until next time,