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We'll Just Refer to Them As...the K-O-F. · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: For Jack's sake, who will just refer to him as
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: the kof It's one more thing. Doctor Michael Levitt, a
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: gastro entrologist, became known as the King of Farts.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: That can be to think of a podcast. Do I
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: have to participate in this?
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: You really don't if you don't want to, because evidently
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: you have no interest in science. This is from a
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: brand new book that's been written by another gastro entrologist,
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Tricia Pashricha pastricha a streeker. If I got your name wrong, Tricia.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: The title of the book is You've been pooping all wrong.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: But this section of the book also concerns the art
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: of gastro entrology, Jack specifically flatulence hard fart primary that
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: there's no need for foolishness Michael. Again, this is a
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: discussion of science, she writes, and she is a she Jack.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Science has finally settled the age old debate of who's oh,
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: you know what, it's funny. I've come to the brink.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: I'm standing on the high dive and I don't want
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: to jump off because it's so it sounds so childish
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: and base. Yes, yes it does. That's my point. Hmm.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: I thought you were, all, well, it's science. Just I'm
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: not going to I know. Well, I climbed the steps
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: to the high dive with great verb and confidence, and
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: I got out there and thought, nope.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: Well you can do it.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: I believe you. Wow, thanks for that shoving. You make
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: me gpt.
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: Now if you give me a few minutes, I could
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: go down to the grade school and get an eight
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: year old and they could come home and do this,
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: because that's who would appreciate it.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: I'll use fancy words because it makes me feel better.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: Science is finally settled the Agel debate of whose flatulence
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: is more objectionable men are women.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, it's even worse than I thought.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: Oh it's just getting started. That's right, Science is right.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: It's the first sentence, Jack, He'll be all right.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: So anyway, I mentioned doctor Michael Levitt. It actually gets
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: more interesting and less childish from there. So Levitt. One day,
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: while a gastro enterology fellow was called into his advisor's
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: office and introduced to a new laboratory instrument, the gas chromatograph.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: And this thing is actually used in many applications. It
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: analyzes gas content in soil. It's used in crime scene investigations,
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: but of course, to two gastro entrologists, it was clear
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: that someone should use it to gain a better understanding
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: of the most pressing of scientific needs, and that would
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: be indeed farting, And so an illustrious career was born.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Levit eventually published over three hundred original scientific works, has
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: won every prestigious award of the UH just the American
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: gastro Enterological Association. He helped develop space suits filtered with
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: activated charcoal to prevent astronauts from having to inhale their
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: own flat us during a space walk. Hmm. I'm sure
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: the as we speak these words, the Fellows and Gal
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: up in space and the Artemis two mission are enjoying
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: his technology. Right.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: The best system we had prior was you just kind
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: of have to like tooting your own helmet.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, essentially, God, Yeah, give you the George Carlin bit
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: on this topic.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: See you go pull dutch Oven in your space suit.
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: And now thanks to this science jack, they don't have
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: to toot in their own helmets.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: Well and and quite literally who smelt it, dealt it
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: in the aggressive scents. I was trying so hard. So
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: then actually this lady gastroentrologist. This sentence is pretty funny,
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: but it was one particular study that put the gender
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: debate to rest, and it is a study I returned
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: to often, both in my clinic and at dinner parties
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: where I have on occasion misjudged the room. Oh so
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: this Levitt's character invited sixteen healthy men and women to
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: consume items that boost gas production, specifically pinto beans on
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: a synthetic sugar called lactu lose. Now was that a
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: factor in the legendary sugar free gummy bear review that
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: was posted to was at Amazon the first time? Oh harribo,
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: yeah gummy bear. Yes, the first time I read that
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: and spawned many attempts at imitation. And you people should
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: be ashamed of yourselves. Quit painting faux mona lises. I
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: had years streaming down my cheeks the first time I
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: read that review. It's brilliantly written, and it had to
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: do with the just spectacular gastro intestinal effects of wolfing
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: down way too much lactolose.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: See you in hell Araba with sugar freak gummy bears?
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: That's it? Yes? Yeah, Oh, the descriptions are it's some
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: of the best humor. I think that's ever been written
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: in the English language anyway, But just I'd say, you know,
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: to bing it or whatever, but you don't want to
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: find an imitation participants. Okay. So they fed the men
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: and women the pento beans and lactulos. Participants and listen
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: to this I used to as longtime listeners know, I
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: would earn five bucks the hard way going to college.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: I was I would make myself the subject of psychology
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: department experiments, which were always actually pretty interesting. This is
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: an hour of my time and at the time it
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: was decent enough money. It might have been ten bucks.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: I don't know. But so participants were fed the beans
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: and lactylos. Then they showed up to the laboratory where
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: a rectal tube was inserted and made a gas tight
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: seal with their darriers. Oh okay. The tube was then
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: connected to a gas impermeable bag and after releasing what
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: they must, its contents were subsequently evaluated by chromatography. But
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: it gets better. The flattest collected in these bags was
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: then sniffed and raided by two independent judges on who
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: signed up for that. Jack Oh my god, listeneth Jackie
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: is suffering oh, we're so awful, where they were judged
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: on a linear scale where zero was no odor and
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: eight was very offensive an aggressive scent worth mentioning. In
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: the year twenty oh three, Popular Science ranked Levitt's flattest
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: codor judge as the worst job in science.
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: Zero you could say, congratulations, your shit doesn't.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Stick exactly exactly. So their job was terrible, but their
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: contributions were enormous. She writes. They found that compared to
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: that of men.
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: Job in science, oh, that's awful.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: Compared to that of men, the flattess of women, women
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: had a much greater odor intensity. But hold your horses,
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: which reminds me of Kramer in the Horse and Seinfeld
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: of course that he fed beeferino. What was it? Something
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: like that. Yeah. The study also found, though, that men
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: produced a larger volume of gas per two, and Levitt
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: argued that because flattess's ability to simulate the nose is
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: more dependent on volume than on concentration noxious gas, that
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: is debatable these differences between the sexes balance out in
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: real life. Now, let's see she takes a shot of
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: teenage boys, which is really mentions their lack of restraint
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: in this this realm but final couple of really interesting
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: scientific facts, because I have no interest in debating the
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: man woman thing. That would just be indelicate. And you
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: know me, mister delicate.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: You're not gonna get me to comment on it.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Still, in certain situations, she writes, no matter your skills
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: in you know, controlled explanation, we're all helpless. One such
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: situation as air travel, we are all gassy on a plane.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's you, maybe it's your neighbor. Before you judge
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: anyone aboard, remember the ideal gas law PV equals NRT.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: With increasing altitude, air pressure, including intestinal air pressure falls. Therefore,
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: the volume of your intestinal gas has to expand. The
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: air in your colon is blocked from traveling backward by
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: a small muscular valve connecting it to the small intestine.
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: Are you all relating to this? I don't relate to that.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: I have not had this experience.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, you and your fart denial.
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: Well, I just have not had this experience. Does this
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: happen to people on planes? I've never heard anybody mention
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: it in my life.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: Well, it's because we're trying to be delicate, like I said,
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: But yes, it's nearly universal.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: Really, yes.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: Therefore, the only path flattis can take is forward and outward,
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: where it joins the recirculating cabin air for the remainder
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: of the flight, which is delightful. But if you need
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: a simple last minute solution to gas our friend and foe,
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: take bi smooth subsalisate over the corner. Five and twenty
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: four milligrams my mouth, four times a day beforehand will
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: do the job. This smooth subsalisate, better known as pepto bismol,
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: binds and neutralizes more than ninety five percent of sulfide
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: gases in the gut. Another landmark discovery from the great
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: doctor Levitt.
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: There you go, worst job on science the.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: Kof right there.
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: I enjoyed the information just about as much as I
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: loved the just look of disgust on Jackson's.
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  Speaker 2: I am the only time ever in thirty years, I've
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: ever been ashamed to be a part of it.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: Well, it was. It was disgusted and like being beaten down. Yeah,
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: it kind of combined into a delightful, nice little disgust
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: and defeat crushing of his spirit. Yeah, defeat, that's the word.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: It was defeated. There, well doed in doctor Levitt your
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: name will live on in glory. Well done, sir.
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: I tried to activate my glops the best I could
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: in between, but just they never stayed activated.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: Well, I guess that's it.