Latest / What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie? / #274: Prom Night 3: The Last Kiss (1990)

Transcript

#274: Prom Night 3: The Last Kiss (1990) · What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie?

0:06
Hello, what's your least favorite scary movie?
0:11
I don't get mad, I bake. Welcome to What's Your Least
0:15
Favorite Scary Movie? The podcast where we talk about
0:18
the good, the bad, the ugly and the absurd and all of our
0:21
favorite. And least favorite?
0:22
Scary movies. Because we believe every horror
0:24
movie rightfully has its fan base.
0:25
Even if we don't always get. It my name is Travis.
0:28
My name is Jesse. And welcome.
0:30
It's prom. Yeah.
0:33
What's up, y'all? It's it's time to grab your
0:35
partner, Go to the big dance. Fancy yourself up?
0:41
Watch a little bit of Prom Night.
0:42
Maybe not in this exact order. In that order.
0:46
Preferably movie of choice. Prom Night 3, The Last Kiss
0:49
Because that's the one we're talking about today.
0:51
Indeed it is we're. Kicking off prom month with.
0:54
Sure are. Maybe the best prom movie ever,
0:58
dare I say. Disgust.
1:01
OK, we'll get into that. But before we get into any of
1:04
this, do you have anything you need to announce?
1:07
A bit. OK.
1:10
Budget tier patrons should have gotten their bonus episode at
1:14
some point this past week. I don't know exactly what day we
1:17
released it cuz we haven't recorded it yet.
1:19
This is future Jesse or past Jesse speaking to future Jesse
1:23
and future patrons. Yeah.
1:25
Anyway, that's out. It was a game.
1:28
It was fun. I'm assuming, again, probably
1:31
past Jesse tacking to future patrons.
1:33
Yeah. But yeah, go ahead.
1:34
Be sure to check that out. As we have started doing, we're
1:37
gonna like, leave the option where you can just buy the
1:39
episode if you want. If you want to join the Patreon,
1:42
that link is at the very bottom of our show notes.
1:44
Just Scroll down. Yeah, scroll all the way down.
1:47
Easy to find. Yep, Yep.
1:48
OK. All right.
1:50
And I think that's it. So I think it's time for a poll
1:55
result. Yeah, so we talked about Texas
1:57
Chainsaw Massacre 3 or a Leatherface, I should say.
2:01
And we? Or you should say both because
2:04
the full title is Leatherface Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3.
2:07
Right. Yeah, that's that's how it goes.
2:09
Don't worry, it's not confusing at all, everybody.
2:12
It's not. It is when we start to realize
2:14
that there is another movie in the series called Leatherface.
2:18
The the series is terrible at titles.
2:20
That's not what we're talking about now.
2:22
We're talking about the poll, which was if you've seen the
2:25
movie, you know that old Leatherface has some lessons
2:28
that he does, and he has a hard time describing what exactly a
2:33
clown is. So we asked everybody what they
2:36
thought the clown was, and nobody said anything.
2:38
So, OK, yeah, we got nothing. It's not FOOD.
2:41
No, it's not FOOD. That's what I would.
2:44
I would, I don't know. I'd say clown send.
2:48
In the clown. It's clown.
2:52
It's clown everybody. Or food.
2:53
Both are correct answers if you ask me.
2:56
All right. Anyways, that's not what we're
2:59
here for anyways. What we're here for is to talk
3:03
about prom Night 3, the last kiss, and goddamn.
3:06
And that's what we're going to do right now.
3:08
Oh boy all. Right, you ready for?
3:09
This hit me up with some information OK?
3:12
So Prom Night 3, The Last Kiss released March 30th, 1990.
3:17
We watched it on YouTube. A user uploaded the movie.
3:21
If you wanna watch it, it's up there.
3:23
Just search Prom Night 3 on YouTube and it'll come up.
3:25
So it's it's an easy one to find out there.
3:28
You can't buy it. I mean, you can buy the DVD, but
3:31
I don't think it's in print anymore.
3:33
So good luck finding it written by Ron Oliver, directed by Ron
3:37
Oliver and Peter R Simpson. And I did some little digging on
3:41
this guy, Ron Oliver here. And if you, like me, were
3:46
watching this movie and thought to yourself, this looks like all
3:49
of the 90s TV series that I've ever watched, the ones that I
3:53
grew up with. Well, there's a very good reason
3:55
for that. It's because he has a lot of,
3:59
you might be a secret fan of Ron Oliver and you just never really
4:02
realized it. OK, so I've got a couple of
4:05
things that he's done. He directed 3 episodes of
4:07
Degrassi, 16 episodes of Goosebumps.
4:11
Which Degrassi is it? Degrassi junior high.
4:14
Degrassi, the next generation. I think it was next generation
4:16
OK. Yeah, it's an important
4:19
distinction. OK to be fair I don't I didn't
4:22
do that deep of a dive. It was a very like first glance
4:25
type thing. 16 episodes of Goosebumps, 17 episodes of Are
4:30
You Afraid of the Dark. Wow, he wrote Prom Night too.
4:35
He is also another thought that crossed my mind is this kind of
4:40
feels like Hallmark movies. Well, he's wrote some of the
4:43
ones that we have loved ourselves, such as Love at the
4:47
Thanksgiving Day Parade. Oh, OK.
4:50
Falling for Christmas, The one with Lindsay Lohan that just
4:53
came out. He wrote that.
4:55
Uh huh. And he has written like 100
4:58
other ones too. So just you've probably seen
5:02
some of Ron Oliver's stuff out there.
5:04
You just never really realized that it's Ron Oliver.
5:06
Maybe that's why this movie makes no sense as a sequel to
5:10
the second one. He was just so busy writing
5:12
other things he completely forgot.
5:14
We'll get into that plot. We'll get into that.
5:17
Music was done by Paula Zaza and special effects makeup was done
5:20
by Light and Motion. Starring Tim Conlon as Alex,
5:25
Cynthia Preston as Sarah, David Stratton as Shane, Courtney
5:28
Taylor is Mary Lou, Dylan Neil as Andrew, Jeremy Ratchford as
5:32
Leonard, and Brock Simpson as Larry.
5:35
And yes, that is the man that has been in prom nights one and
5:38
two also, and he's also in four. He's in every single prom night
5:42
movie except for the remake if I had to guess.
5:46
I really, really hope whenever we get to the remake that he's
5:49
in that one as well. I.
5:50
Hope so too, all right, time for a favorite game on the show,
5:53
budget or budgeted? If this has more than 5 digits
6:00
in its budget, I'm going to throw my pen.
6:03
All right, be prepared to throw it because the budget for this
6:05
is 1.5 million there's. A fucking.
6:09
Way you got to remember, Jesse, this is a Canadian production
6:11
where they throw money at you to make stuff just because it's in
6:14
Canada. Sorry, I booed it.
6:16
Yeah, I mean, they, they really want people to make stuff, so
6:19
they they give you the means to do so.
6:22
I like that. Even if it means we get a prom
6:24
night three. I think that it's worth the
6:26
sacrifice. Opening box office.
6:29
I don't have and I don't have the gross, but the IMDb is 4.6
6:32
on IMDb. Shocking.
6:34
Yeah, yeah, it's not that bad. This movie isn't that terrible,
6:38
OK? It's it's not the greatest.
6:40
I'm not gonna like sit here and tell everybody that this is a
6:43
good movie, but it's not a bad movie.
6:46
I think 4.6 is. I think that's fair.
6:50
I think that's fair for this. All right, so I have 3 movies
6:53
from 1990 here. Basically, I just spelled out
6:56
the plot of this movie with these 3 movies.
6:59
This is basically the events that happened in this movie.
7:01
That's fun. So movie #1 Dead Girls that
7:05
released September 1st 1990. I don't have the budget or the
7:09
gross but it is a 4.4 on IMDb so it's lower than prom night
7:14
three. OK movie #2 I bought a Vampire
7:18
Motorcycle released July 6th 1990 on a £320,000 budget.
7:29
Who don't have the gross for that one?
7:31
Jolly who? But it's a 5.4 on IMDb 10, the
7:36
third movie, I'm Dangerous Tonight, early August 8th, 1990.
7:41
No budget, no gross, but it's a 5 out of 10 well.
7:44
That was a fantastic theme. The thing that I really tried to
7:48
do, I tried to write a haiku out of the movies, but I couldn't
7:53
find enough movies that fit what I wanted.
7:57
Yeah, you got to find 575 and that's just, that's a lot.
8:01
Dude I even 17. Syllables of movies.
8:03
I even I put several movies through a haiku checker just to
8:06
make sure that I was actually doing it right and I was not.
8:12
I almost got there, but I gave up.
8:14
That's my favorite bot on olive Reddit is the haiku bot.
8:17
I like that too. Yeah.
8:19
All right, so I have two tag lines, both of them on the
8:21
poster. Boy.
8:23
The first one, Alex, thinks he's died and gone to heaven.
8:26
He's half right. OK.
8:30
Okay, I feel like you said the same thing.
8:32
Yeah, I said it about Leonard when he was like, I don't think
8:35
Alex is the killer. Alex is too smart to bury them
8:39
in the football field. That's right, that's what.
8:41
He said half correct. He's not the killer.
8:44
He's not too smart. Though honestly contended for
8:47
another tagline for us right there, Alex.
8:50
Isn't that dumb enough to bury them in the the football field?
8:55
Well I I like how managed to gaslight the entire school into
9:00
thinking he was actually smart just by putting a Mama on a roll
9:03
once. Yeah, I mean, he started, I
9:06
don't know, maybe he was just a guy that wasn't applying
9:08
himself. You know, that that's the case.
9:10
That happens to some people. I mean, that very clearly
9:13
happened to him. He said he needed to study for
9:15
his biology test, but he didn't even bring his book home from
9:17
school. Because he he was busy fucking a
9:19
ghost. He didn't.
9:20
He wouldn't have fucked the ghost if he had taken his
9:22
biology book from the school in the first place.
9:24
Well that's true, but then how are you going to fuck a ghost?
9:28
I think the moral of this movie is that you don't fuck the
9:31
ghost. I don't know man.
9:32
This is not ghost with Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore.
9:36
You don't fuck this ghost. Well, you'll never know until
9:41
you try. That's the moral of the story.
9:43
People always fuck the ghosts. I.
9:47
Just check your pulse real. Quick, always, always fuck the
9:51
ghosts people. All right, so let's do some fun
9:54
facts. I was about that.
9:55
How's about it? All right, so Ron Oliver wrote
9:58
Prom Night 2 and Prom Night 3 at the same time.
10:02
Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, he did it because he was
10:06
really banking on the first one doing well enough to warrant a
10:08
sequel. And if that was going to be the
10:10
case, he was locked and loaded. He had it ready to go.
10:14
They were both under the name The Haunting of Hamilton High.
10:16
One and two. This is the reason why there are
10:19
these are the only two movies that have any continuity in this
10:23
franchise. It's because that they were
10:25
already a like a pre written sequel like a duology before
10:30
they even entered the prom night realm.
10:33
So just to give some context here, I know that this movie
10:35
gets brought up as like that it was filmed in Serrano.
10:39
Pretty harsh shoot. It was so rough that Peter
10:42
Simpson, who was the producer at the time, had to be so present
10:45
on set that he was basically granted a Co director credit.
10:49
OK, Speaking of production, the original producer for this movie
10:53
was Jose Menendez, and if that name sounds familiar, he is the
10:58
dad that was murdered by the Menendez sons.
11:02
Oh God, Talia really did not care for that.
11:05
Talia has seen the Menendez documentary.
11:08
Yeah, I didn't really expect this movie to kind of be topical
11:11
because that's a hot situation that's come up here lately.
11:14
I've been seeing it in the news. It's kind of interesting.
11:16
Yeah, the whole thing with that situation is bizarre, but the
11:20
fact that it's also rolled into the production of Prom Night
11:23
Three and Last Kiss makes it even more weird.
11:26
Yeah, not not something I was expecting.
11:28
I wasn't expecting to talk about the Menendez brothers today.
11:34
So yeah, my brain just searched. Anyway, what's the next fact?
11:40
Well, to continue that fact, it caused a delay in the
11:44
production, so they had to set back production in a couple of
11:46
weeks because of that. And I don't know, maybe that's
11:48
why Peter Simpson became the producer, because the other
11:52
producer died. Speaking of Peter Simpson, who
11:54
was the producer, he was pretty terrible by all accounts on set.
11:58
He clashed with a lot of people. He made the Mary Lou actor
12:03
Cynthia Preston cry because he made a remark about her chest
12:07
and it was not a super chill time on set, apparently.
12:11
Speaking of other issues on production and maybe something
12:15
that explains some of the weirdness of this movie, the
12:18
editor did not really give a fuck.
12:22
Any time that he was given directions, he ignored them.
12:25
He did what he wanted with this movie and he got to the point
12:29
where Ron Oliver blew up at the special effects artist because
12:33
he thought that they were ignoring his direction.
12:36
But he gave him the notes that they handed to the editor and
12:40
saw that he was just not even paying attention to anything
12:43
that they said. He made all the edits he wanted
12:45
to and he just did his own thing.
12:48
Also, the original Mary Lou, the one that played in Prom Night 2.
12:53
Lisa Schrage was never contacted to be in the film and it sounds
12:56
like she would have done it. She's still does the con rounds
13:00
as Mary Lou. God, I would love to meet her.
13:03
Yeah, she was at Warham last year I think, so it's a shame,
13:07
but that means that there's always a chance.
13:10
OK, I don't know that I would have wanted her to be in this
13:13
movie because this is a terrible Mary Lou.
13:16
The character. Yeah.
13:19
Terrible how? It's not written the same,
13:22
that's why I find it shocking that it was written at the same
13:25
time. I could have given him a pass if
13:26
he was like busy and forgot what he previously wrote.
13:30
So on the DVD release that did happen in 2003, it was bundled
13:34
with Prom Night 4 Delivers From Evil and It.
13:38
It's not even the one that it's connected to.
13:40
No, and it's not even the one that you wanna watch.
13:43
It's the edited for TV version. It includes alternate camera
13:46
angles, alternate takes. There's dubs over the profanity
13:50
in the movie. It's a not good cut of the
13:52
movie. It would basically be what is
13:54
playing on Nickelodeon. Wow, if you would put it on
13:58
there. Yeah, but there's hope there is
14:01
as of this year, 2025, there's an announcement that there is
14:06
going to be a Blu-ray release that has the uncut version by
14:10
Synapse. So that's good.
14:13
They they do good releases. Like we've got a couple of them
14:15
on our shelf in there and that's that's a that's on the bright
14:19
side right there. All right, that's it for fun
14:21
facts. So let's talk about this movie.
14:23
What was the good Jesse? What'd you like about it?
14:26
I thought that it had a sense of humor sometimes.
14:29
Yeah, it was written as a comedy.
14:30
Intentionally. Like the announcements that they
14:32
make over the intercom. Some of those were pretty funny.
14:35
Like drivers at his big. Cancelled after Tuesday's
14:38
accident. The teacher's funeral will be
14:41
this Thursday. I just realized I've completely
14:45
skipped the second tagline, which is a romantic comedy from
14:50
hell. So yeah, I mean, it fully
14:51
acknowledges on the cover that it's a comedy.
14:53
OK. Yeah, there.
14:55
Is something else that I thought was kind of funny.
14:59
I can't remember what it was though.
15:02
So yeah, I think I had like, it definitely had a sense of humor.
15:06
I think that the story was, I think maybe if this wasn't a
15:15
Mary Lou movie, it might be a little bit more.
15:18
So if you separate from the Prom Night series.
15:23
I'm not even saying from the Prom night series, I'm just
15:25
saying make it like the other Prom Night movies with no
15:28
connection to the one before it. OK.
15:29
Yeah, OK. 'Cause I mean like this dumb
15:32
dumb who thinks he's going to go straight into medical school
15:35
from high school and nobody bothers to correct him on this
15:37
is like burying the bodies out in the football field because
15:40
he's like pussy whipped by this ghost.
15:42
Like that has potential. You know what I mean?
15:46
I think with like maybe better set of circumstances on the set
15:52
and I mean I think maybe it could have gone differently in a
15:56
different world or timeline. Yeah, I saw comments from Ron
16:02
Oliver that he was saying he acknowledged or acknowledged
16:07
after the fact the shortcomings of the movie, and he doesn't
16:11
want to pin blame on anybody in particular.
16:13
He just recognizes that it could have been better.
16:15
I mean, I tried to give him an out and just say he forgot what
16:19
the Mary Lou characterization is, but if he wrote them at the
16:21
same time then yeah. No, Ron, this is your fault,
16:24
dude. Yeah, yeah.
16:26
I mean. I was shocked.
16:28
What? Because I looked it up.
16:29
I was like, surely these are different writers?
16:30
And then I saw it was the same writer.
16:32
And I was like, how? Yeah, it is.
16:34
It's a tonal shift, completely. And Mary Lou character isn't?
16:40
I think he just took the character and turned the dial of
16:44
camp all the way up on her. No, I think that's what he did.
16:48
No, it's a completely different character with the same name.
16:51
And I'm not talking about the recast of the actress or
16:53
anything either. OK, well, is that all the good
16:57
that you have to say? Yeah, For me, this is a movie
17:02
that is a product of its era. I was born in the 90s.
17:06
I grew up with all kinds of productions like this.
17:08
And the fact that this guy went on to do Are You Afraid of the
17:12
Dark and Goosebumps is probably why this type of movie resonated
17:16
with me well enough. I think that's why I'm able to
17:18
be like, it's fine. It's it's a fine movie because I
17:21
grew up with these types of like things.
17:24
This, this felt like I was watching an episode of
17:26
Goosebumps. It felt like I was watching an
17:28
episode of are You Afraid of the Dark.
17:31
So whenever I was watching this in there, I kind of felt like I
17:35
was watching something from my childhood.
17:37
OK, which that's not going to be the case for a lot of people,
17:41
and I fully acknowledge that. But I also think this movie is
17:43
just silly. And there were times that I was
17:46
just giggling to myself because I actually thought the movie was
17:49
funny at times. It was entertaining and you
17:53
know, that's really all the movie has to be.
17:55
It's not boring. And that's that's what I need
17:58
from a movie most of the time. And it managed to accomplish
18:01
that. So I think that that's a good
18:02
thing. All right.
18:04
What? What's the bad Jesse?
18:06
All right, this is a completely different character and this is
18:08
not a matter of the becoming camp because like we talked
18:12
about Hello Mary Lou last year, that movie, I love it for all
18:17
that it is. This character is this poor
18:19
little lovesick puppy and all she cares about is getting the
18:22
boy. Mary Lou Maloney is a bad ass
18:26
fucking bitch who just cares about being top dog, you know
18:29
what I mean? And this is not what this
18:31
character is. She is so focused on getting the
18:34
guy and that's all that her entire like arc is.
18:39
I think this. No, there are big differences in
18:42
the second one. She's not.
18:44
She doesn't want to like tie down one person.
18:46
She likes to bounce around. I mean, that was her character
18:48
beforehand. She doesn't commit to anybody or
18:51
anything. Yeah, and like, if she had found
18:53
some different way to, like, be present in the physical
18:56
universe, like, OK, whatever. I can get on board with that.
18:59
It's just the fact that she is like this completely, like,
19:03
neutered version of herself. And I hate it because, like,
19:07
Mary Lou Maloney in the second movie in Hello, Mary Lou 2,
19:11
rather in prom night 2 is what I mean by the 2nd movie.
19:14
I got you. Yeah.
19:15
Like she would want the guy but just to prove that she could get
19:19
him like but not because she actually loved him and cared so
19:22
much about him that she wants to bring him down to her help prom
19:24
forever. It's despite somebody else.
19:26
Yeah, it would have been like she's trying to get at Sarah.
19:29
Yes, yeah. And that's not what this
19:32
character is, which is why it is shocking to me that these movies
19:35
were written at the same time because it is such a difference.
19:40
And it, it just frustrates me because I love Mary Lou as a
19:43
character. I love Hello Mary Lou as a
19:45
movie. So I was excited to like, be
19:48
back in that land. And right away I was just like,
19:51
you know, when she first seduces him and they have sex on the
19:54
American flag, I was like, OK, cool, I'm very Canadian, let's
19:57
see what happens. And then she's just like, just
20:02
this sad little lovesick puppy. And I just, I hate it.
20:06
I hate it. Yeah, I mean, that was one of
20:08
the things I had written down too, is that she was a very
20:10
different character. And yeah, I don't think the
20:13
change was for the best. I think if they went with the
20:15
original, it would have been fine.
20:17
Or like you said, make it a different character all
20:20
together. And then that would have been
20:22
fine too. Because it's a haunting at
20:23
Hamilton High. Like, would it just be a haunted
20:26
high school where various other people who died?
20:29
You know, like we've seen that, that place in the last movie,
20:33
The principal showed up with a fucking gun.
20:35
You know, like people. It's got a bizarre history.
20:38
It's got shit that goes down. Yeah, I even got excited when
20:41
the principal in this one, like cuts off his own finger.
20:43
I was like, yay, we still have incompetent principles.
20:46
And dude, Hamilton High, one of the.
20:48
Great. One of the things I read about
20:49
that, that was the moment in the movie that he was the most proud
20:52
of because he thought he said that like that to him, was that
20:56
homage to Argento style. I don't see Argento doing a
21:00
scene like that. I mean, I get what he's going
21:05
for, but like that it just didn't really.
21:07
Argento isn't for like a weird, bizarre thing like that.
21:10
I don't think he's. He's more like interesting
21:14
camera movements and Java, you know?
21:18
Yeah. But you know what?
21:20
I did like that moment. It was fun.
21:22
I liked it. I thought it was fun.
21:23
All right. Do you have any other bad stuff?
21:26
I mean, that's the main thing that took me out of this.
21:29
Like I said, if it if it didn't have that tie in, I could maybe
21:33
turn my brain off, enjoy it for the like, you know, goosebumps
21:38
with boobies that it is but not. Even boobies, really.
21:42
We don't even really get boobies in this.
21:44
We get some nudity, but it's all kind of hidden.
21:46
Yeah. So I yeah, it just it, you know,
21:53
and even if it was like a four studio tie, I'm like, OK, we
21:56
gotta make this character very little.
21:57
But like Ron made these decisions.
22:00
This is on his shoulders. You can't give him a scapegoat
22:03
right there. He he made his bet.
22:05
He fucked up. Yeah, OK, yeah.
22:08
I mean, one of the things that jumped out to me immediately was
22:11
the weird pacing in edits, which after doing some research,
22:14
really became apparent because of the editor, because he just
22:18
went rogue. Another thing, I just felt like
22:21
the stakes in the movie were non existent.
22:23
Like any time he encountered her or like he killed or she killed
22:28
somebody and he walked into the room, he was like, oh God, Mary
22:30
Lou, what'd you do? You know, it's like he's not
22:33
even really concerned about. It's like, oh, geez, now I got
22:35
to bury a body. Fuck.
22:37
Yeah. It just, it never really
22:39
mattered. Never ever really seemed to
22:42
truly matter. You know what this movie really
22:45
thought it was going to be more like Can't buy me love.
22:49
Shit on the House, Yeah. Like you get that like Rise of
22:55
Mcsteamy, you know, becoming or Mcdreamy, I forget which one he
22:59
is. Mcsteamy is Malachi.
23:01
OK, like God damn it, it's. A Mcsteamy pile of shit.
23:09
But, you know, like, where you see this rise of him becoming
23:12
popular and he wants to hang on to that and he becomes a
23:15
completely like, I could see a world where that's the story
23:19
that's happening, but with extra stakes because then he's on the
23:21
hook for murders. But that's not what happened.
23:24
I remember at what point we paused and it was 16 minutes in
23:27
and we were like God. I was excited at that part,
23:32
actually. I was happy.
23:34
Like, man, yeah. Hell yeah.
23:35
This is already this weird. I can't wait for the rest of
23:38
this ride. We had different viewing
23:40
experiences, I think. Yeah.
23:42
There was another theme of movies that I was going to do
23:44
that was going to be your potentially how you feel
23:46
watching this movie, which would have been misery.
23:52
I'm dead. Oh, no.
23:53
Brain dead is what it is. And I was going to find a third
23:57
one, but I changed courses like, two other times throughout.
24:01
All right, What's the ugly? Well, this movie doesn't pass
24:05
the Bechtel test first of all. Wow, you're right.
24:09
Which is again ties back into the the like desolation of Mary
24:15
Lou's character. I'm I'm furious.
24:18
I'm furious about her character in this.
24:20
And then, you know, I guess also the, I think Alex in some ways
24:27
was set up for failure because everybody's so shocked when he,
24:31
like, gets a good score on his test and all of his teachers and
24:35
his guidance counselor are like, you're too stupid to be a
24:37
doctor. I'm gonna be out.
24:38
I mean, that's kind of the things that I liked about this
24:41
movie. And yeah, it's ugly.
24:42
I get it. It's shitty that people are
24:44
like, this is good. He's kind of filled by the
24:46
system, it feels. He doesn't apply himself, but
24:48
why should he have people treat him like this?
24:51
Nobody really seems to care if he fails or not.
24:53
And Shane is his Malachi in this, where he's just doing all
24:57
of these things. My God, you're right.
24:59
Buddies together and Alex is like fuck you nerd.
25:04
The only. Difference is again that is very
25:07
accurate to can't find me love but.
25:09
Yeah, Mary Lou is making him popular and successful and yeah,
25:13
that's all he cares about. Yeah, yeah, that's in that would
25:17
man, the comparisons between the two are really fair.
25:18
They're. Just gonna keep piling up as we
25:21
go through, I feel. Yeah, My Ugly is just like the
25:24
overall cheap feel of the movie. I like it.
25:26
It's endearing to me. They were like the way that some
25:29
of these scenes were shot are very poorly done.
25:31
But I mean, I they made them unintentionally funny to me, I
25:35
think at times. There was a boom mic that like
25:37
dipped into the screen at one point there when he was meeting
25:40
with the guidance counselor and that plant was just in the way.
25:44
At first I was like, wow, this is, and they kind of tried to
25:46
incorporate it, but it wasn't. And it wasn't gaggy enough to be
25:50
a gag, you know what I mean? I just like there were so many
25:53
moments that I just thought were funny just because of the way
25:56
that they were shot and edited. Like the whole scene of him,
26:01
wherever we're introducing him on the football team and he's
26:03
just like it's like montage and getting tackled, but it's like
26:06
the most half hearted tackles ever.
26:08
I don't know enough about football to know if he was
26:11
actually that bad at it because I felt like tackling is part of
26:14
football. If you get tackled, you're not
26:17
supposed to get tackled and you're trying to score.
26:19
You're supposed to get to the other side of the field standing
26:21
I'll. Have to look up the rules of
26:24
football. It is Canadian football, so it
26:26
could be different. OK, what's the absurd?
26:31
I hesitate to call Alex stupid again and be another line of
26:34
people in his life doing that but either he's stupid or he's
26:37
bad at sex because when him and very lure fucking in the home at
26:42
groom she got her undies on. I was thinking about that too,
26:46
but then again, like maybe just pull it to the side.
26:49
I don't know. That's that's the only thing I
26:51
could think of. But then again, I'm giving run
26:53
all over excuses here. Yeah, I just, it's they, they
26:58
again, it could have been shot differently, but if you're gonna
27:02
try and like fake the sex, you're gonna fake it better.
27:04
I mean Mary Lou is faking it really well cuz again, she had
27:08
the underwear on. So maybe they're grinding on
27:11
each other, yeah. Like she's moaning from all that
27:15
dry humping. Yeah, dude, it's hot.
27:17
Have you ever been a ghost and had sex?
27:20
No, you don't know how it feels. I once again I must say I am not
27:25
Patrick Swayze or Demi Moore. And the movie goes.
27:28
That's your problem. There's a lot in this movie that
27:33
can be brought up as absurd, so here are some of.
27:36
Them I wanna hear your highlights.
27:39
First of all, we're introduced to hell slash limbo.
27:42
Whatever it is, it's just line dancing.
27:45
Dude that felt very Beetlejuice to me.
27:48
It kind of did, Yeah. But instead of waiting for your
27:51
ticket to find out what you're going to do in the afterlife,
27:54
you're just dancing. Yeah.
27:56
And it's organized dancing. They're all, like, shuffling,
27:59
like, In Sync. I don't understand it.
28:02
And we don't see that happening again.
28:07
We see them in hell or limbo, I guess, and it's just prom.
28:10
But I don't know if that was Mary Lou's influence in that
28:13
time. I think her personal hell is
28:15
just having the line dance. That might be what it is.
28:18
The whole making out on the American flag thing while the
28:22
national anthem plays was so weird.
28:24
The football tryouts were weird. That dad is weird as fuck.
28:29
His whole scenes are over the top.
28:31
And then there's that one scene of him cleaning the gun, and I
28:34
swear to God, I thought he was like, he works himself up so
28:36
hard talking about women that rip your heart out.
28:39
Yeah. And then he's like, got a
28:40
shotgun and he, like, aims it at the wall.
28:42
And I swear I thought he was going to shoot something.
28:44
He was so amped up because of it.
28:46
The whole family was so weird the way they had that party for
28:48
his 100% on the test. How?
28:51
How does that happen? Like who?
28:53
Who finds out their son's score before he does the school be
28:58
like they call them families like damn we gotta let them know
29:01
he got 100. Your dumb dumb idiot son
29:04
actually did well on his test. You should blow up some condoms
29:08
and write 100% on the wall because those balloons were not
29:11
blown up all the way. They looked like condoms.
29:13
No, no. And one thing that we get that's
29:17
consistent with this in the other prom night movie that I
29:20
liked was we get the exaggerated dancing.
29:23
Which was? Cool.
29:23
Yeah, we got that with Leonard. And man, Leonard had some
29:26
fucking moves as like a nerdy dude.
29:29
He could fucking dance. Leonard was destined to peak in
29:32
his like mid 20s early 30s. He deserved to live longer
29:35
because he would have gone on to like really self actualize, you
29:38
know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.
29:40
I don't know. He would have been an
29:41
interesting case. But anyways, we'll get into
29:44
plenty of other absurd stuff as we talk about this movie, but in
29:47
the meantime, what do you want to rate it?
29:50
For. OK.
29:52
Yeah, I think the four is pretty good for four and a half.
29:54
I'll give it 4 1/2. Wow, one of the times we're
29:57
actually going to be lower than the IMDb because we have a 4.25.
30:01
Wow. Yeah, OK.
30:02
I mean, sometimes it happens, people.
30:04
The movie's not that great, but it's not.
30:07
We say every movie has its fan base and the people that like
30:11
this movie, I'm glad you like it, I really am.
30:14
But as of right now, as a big fat knot for me.
30:18
So we'll see how we feel after we talk about it a little bit,
30:21
OK? Maybe we'll hear some feedback
30:22
from people that really enjoy it.
30:24
OK, OK, so the movie begins with Mary Lou's tombstone.
30:30
We get a glance at it in the graveyard and then we pan down
30:34
to hell where Mary Lou is just line dancing.
30:37
I refer to it as apathetic chain dancing because all of the all
30:41
of the ghoul girls are chained together.
30:43
Maybe this is what the prom is like, they're I don't know.
30:47
It's a very weird situation. Can you imagine dying and being
30:50
stuck in a high school prom forever?
30:52
That's I mean that. I feel like that would work for
30:54
a mean girl like Mary Lou. Yeah, I think she's fine there.
30:57
She's comfortable there. That would be terrible for me.
31:00
Yeah, I don't think I would like.
31:01
That I'm sweaty thinking about it.
31:03
I don't like it. My my high school problem is
31:05
probably as absurd as this movie too.
31:08
Didn't you ride up on a golf cart?
31:11
Well, yeah, out of U-Haul, I think U-Haul, we had a guy that
31:15
danced so hard to Cotton Eye Joe that he threw up everywhere.
31:21
And like, that was his big moment, too.
31:23
He was really banking on that being like the moment that he,
31:25
like, really got accepted by the class.
31:28
It just kind of fell apart when he threw up.
31:33
Everywhere. Anyway, she has a nail file and
31:35
is able to foul her way out of her chain and then she, like her
31:40
ghost like, flies through the hallways and seduces the janitor
31:46
down to the boiler room where he is attacked by a jukebox.
31:51
Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's got a pacemaker, he says.
31:55
So she uses the electricity from the jukebox to make it explode.
32:00
Yeah. And once again we borrowed this
32:01
electricity from shopping mall. Yeah, we did.
32:05
You know this right here, I like, I like this.
32:07
Like the little jukebox thing was kind of nice jukebox stuff.
32:12
The jukebox will return people don't worry about.
32:14
It. Yeah, briefly.
32:15
Yeah. All right.
32:16
So now we see we're at a performance of the gym's
32:21
reopening. I guess like the movie, like
32:25
we're picking up after the gym as being has been reconstructed
32:29
from Mary Louise last. Yeah, so the gym is being
32:33
reconstructed. It's almost prom time, but it's
32:37
also actively football season. I'm very confused about the
32:40
timeline. Canadian football, Canadian
32:42
football. There we.
32:43
Go they they play it by their own rules, yeah.
32:46
OK, that that you know what, that's all we need to.
32:48
Say they've got to. They've got to compete with
32:49
hockey. Man listen, I learned this
32:52
watching yellow jackets. There is apparently different
32:54
regions do actually have different like seasons for their
32:59
sports because everybody was having an issue with the soccer
33:03
like nationals being at the time of year that it was.
33:06
And then everybody's like no, but actually in New Jersey in
33:08
the 1990s and I was like, this is a lot more than I ever
33:12
thought I would know about soccer.
33:14
So all right, we'll just say it's Canadian football.
33:17
That's how they do it. I.
33:18
Get up to that. The band is playing La Bamba.
33:21
I like that. It's it is a classic of bands
33:26
across the world. Yeah, I've definitely played it.
33:30
And they're cuz they're like, yeah, like you said, doing the
33:33
dedication. And this principle is so sure
33:37
that Hamilton High is not Sunnydale High.
33:40
And he was like, nothing bad will ever happen again, except
33:43
for right now. And then he snips his finger as
33:46
he's trying to do the ribbon cutting.
33:48
I love his attitude where he's just like, everything is groovy,
33:51
man. We're all cool, we're all chill
33:53
up in here. It's going to be a very cool
33:57
time. What were the buzzwords of that
34:00
in the 90s? He said groovy a lot.
34:02
Yeah, he was. Totally tubular.
34:06
Yeah, his hair. He reminded me of Cranston in
34:10
Parks and Rec. You know, and Leslie's like
34:12
trying to get his endorsement for City Council.
34:15
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. All right.
34:19
So yeah, finger go. Bye.
34:21
Bye. Yeah, Alex and his bro Shame are
34:25
in gym class. Maybe, I don't know.
34:27
They're planning their future together.
34:29
Picturing it as the fitness club from Toxic Avenger.
34:34
It kind of looks like it, yeah. I don't know, maybe they're in
34:36
like a gym off campus or whatever, but they're talking
34:39
about they're wanting to do a road trip together.
34:41
Shane's wanting to do one with Alex, but Alex is kind of
34:44
indecisive because he's also wanting to do stuff with his
34:47
girlfriend Sarah, who's also there off to the side.
34:49
Putting on the farm all summer. Yeah, I don't, we don't expand
34:54
on any of this, but there was something going to go down at
34:57
the farm. Yeah, yeah.
34:59
Anyway, they're just like, they're arguing over his love,
35:02
basically. Then the guidance counselor
35:04
calls Alex to her office. So she'd be like, hey, you dumb
35:09
dummy idiot, you're never going to get into medical school.
35:12
Do you even know what biology is?
35:14
We just came, I like this because it's like it's like, all
35:18
right, So with the, the current grades you have right now,
35:21
you're not doing well. So there's no chance you would
35:23
ever do anything like say Med school.
35:25
So what do you see yourself doing as like Med school?
35:28
He's like, so he's like not even listening to her.
35:30
He just heard that last part. It's like I'm going to Med
35:33
school. So let's see, Juno came out when
35:37
we were in high school and one year for Halloween, I dressed as
35:40
Juno and my guidance counselor called me to her office because
35:45
she was very concerned about me. And she was like, your grades
35:48
are so good. I thought you had.
35:50
I set on going to college and I was like.
35:53
She she thought you were actually pregnant.
35:54
Yeah. You got that big that fast?
35:56
Yep. Wow.
35:59
That's that's kind of embarrassing on her part.
36:02
Yeah, she, I didn't really like her as a guidance counselor.
36:05
I'm pretty sure actually we had to do like surveys at one point
36:08
on how we felt the guidance office was like serving the
36:13
student population. And I was like, not well.
36:18
Surprisingly for Harlan, we had a really chill. 1.
36:21
He was really cool. He would joke around.
36:22
To be fair, like we had one counselor per grade and I
36:25
graduated with over 200 students so.
36:27
One per grade. Yeah.
36:29
OK. I guess that makes sense because
36:30
my entire high school was my my graduating class was like 56
36:34
people. Yeah.
36:34
So, yeah, it makes sense that we only had one.
36:39
All right, so he is at his Walker now and he is approached
36:45
by Sarah and he's like, hey, do you remember what day it is?
36:47
And he's like Thursday. And she's like, I knew you'd
36:51
forget. It's our anniversary, that's why
36:53
I got you a stethoscope even though you haven't gotten into
36:55
college. Little in medical school.
36:57
Is this how medical school works in Canada?
36:58
Do they just go straight from high school to medical school?
37:01
Because I know that works like Graduate School works like that
37:04
in some other countries. Can we put the tagline I'm I'm
37:07
just doing this now this? Is how this works in Canada.
37:10
This is the theme of every. You think the the tagline is
37:14
blame Canada. I mean, because yeah, you know
37:20
Canada, we love you Canada. It's just we don't know how you
37:24
guys operate up there entirely. We'll have to have Steve on here
37:27
to. Yeah, we we need our Canadian
37:29
correspondent Steve to explain. Yeah, I like, I like the
37:33
tagline. Is this how Canada works?
37:35
Yeah, OK. Yeah, I like the so.
37:39
I like how he's just like playing with the stuff.
37:41
Yeah, stuff. How the fuck do you say that
37:44
Stuff's? How do you say it?
37:47
Stethoscope. Stethoscope.
37:49
Thank you. I like how he just plays with
37:51
the stethoscope and he's just like he puts it on his ears.
37:54
He just like holds it up to us. I was like hello.
37:56
He's like he's like treating it like the Canon old like or the
38:01
cup in a wire thing. I Hey, can you hear me?
38:04
I had a stethoscope at one point and it.
38:08
Yeah, like you really, it is very tempting to like take it
38:11
and you tap it probably hurts, but it's.
38:12
Yeah, it's so sensitive that you would have just like go hello.
38:16
And like. Then he spends the rest of the
38:17
movie death. You know what?
38:18
I. Mean maybe he does.
38:19
That would explain a lot. Of yeah, but actually he
38:22
explains so much to the rest of the.
38:23
Movie. Yeah.
38:26
OK, so she's like, really upset about everything.
38:29
And he is upset about himself. Like, he's like, OK, don't
38:33
worry. Like I'm going to take you to a
38:34
nice candle at dinner tonight. Did not forget about the
38:37
anniversary. It's totally cool.
38:39
And then we immediately cut to them in their car.
38:42
They picked up fast food. He drove to a place to park and
38:45
he lit 2 candles on his dashboard.
38:46
Dashboard. Yeah.
38:47
And then he's like, I'm sick of this average life.
38:49
I'm average height. I have the average shoe size.
38:52
I'll get married at the average age.
38:53
I'm second string on the football team, team I and you
39:00
can see Sarah's just like, oh, and you have an average
39:02
girlfriend too. Like you can tell that she was
39:04
like seething and she's like, let's just leave.
39:06
And so he's like, I need to go pick up my biology book and
39:09
she's like, drop me off at home first.
39:11
Which was the right call? I like this, Yeah, this whole
39:13
thing. And she's like, he's like, are
39:14
we fighting? She's like, we're not fighting.
39:16
And then they keep going. He's like, we're fighting,
39:18
aren't we? Yeah.
39:19
Because Alex, you know what? Again, I don't want to be
39:22
another line of people in his life that's unsupportive.
39:25
But Alex, he's kind of a dum dum dummy.
39:27
Yeah, he's a average man. Give him a break.
39:30
Give him a break. He's average.
39:31
OK, I. Think his brains are blue?
39:33
I'm average here. OK, cut me some slack, people.
39:35
I want to be in Med school. All right.
39:38
So they cut to him. He's at the high school.
39:41
I like how this is a consistent thing with the last movie, too.
39:44
This high school is just open for business 24/7.
39:47
You can come and go as you please.
39:49
And he goes in there to get his biology book, but he is greeted
39:52
by Mary Lou. Yeah, and he's like, hey, I just
39:57
met you and this is crazy, but let's have sex right here on the
40:01
stairwell. I'm average baby.
40:03
I'm average baby. And she's like, Oh, yeah, yeah.
40:08
Aw, talk dirty to me. And so he wakes up the next
40:11
morning at the school day is starting.
40:14
And apparently the school is not just open for business at the
40:18
start of the day because it's like a mob of students come in
40:20
at once and he's running around. He's got the flag wrapped around
40:24
him. At some point, he manages to do
40:26
a very intricate knot at the back of it.
40:29
Yeah, before he gets to the locker.
40:30
Room Why did he not just put his clothes back on?
40:32
Why did he like, feel the need to just wrap himself in this
40:35
flag? He's patriotic.
40:38
He's a very. He's patriotic for the wrong
40:39
country. Even he's.
40:40
Average Travis. Yeah, OK.
40:44
Just your average Canadian love story here.
40:48
Well, he goes to the bathroom to pull himself together, and
40:51
that's where Andrew, the football captain, gives him some
40:54
shit. There's some hostility between
40:57
these two. They're both competing for the
40:59
quarterback position. And he goes to the pay phone and
41:03
calls his parents and it's like, yeah, no, I'm fine.
41:06
The car is fine. And Sarah comes up and she's
41:08
baked in breakfast even though he doesn't deserve her baked
41:12
goods. And she's like, that's what I do
41:13
when I'm mad is I bake. I and I like how this comes up.
41:17
Yeah. Repeatedly.
41:19
He's like her. Hey, let's just bake.
41:21
Let's just bake. Yeah, her baking the cookies
41:23
angry later. And there's just like several
41:26
dozen cookies stacked around the kitchen.
41:29
You know, that's a, that's a positive way to put that stuff.
41:32
Yeah, that energy to some of them.
41:34
All right, so it is now. Well, first we cut to Alex and
41:39
Shane in the library, and they're doing our favorite
41:42
thing, which is reviewing some microvies.
41:45
That's right, yeah. And that's when he learns about
41:47
the history of Hamilton High and Mary Lou Maloney, how she died
41:51
in a fire at her prom. And he goes, oh, that's her.
41:54
Would they not have like discussed her appearance?
41:57
You know, from destroying the whole school a few years ago
42:01
maybe. You know, I don't think so.
42:04
Like I mean, everybody was aware that it was Mary Lou.
42:06
She like fucking rose up as a demon during the whole prom
42:10
night ceremony. I think maybe literally
42:12
everybody else in the school knows besides Alex.
42:16
He's average people. Yeah, man, that's just the two
42:22
excuses for this movie. He's Canadian and he's average.
42:25
We're not calling Canadians average.
42:27
No, we're not. We don't want to make you guys a
42:29
51st date. That's really fucking rude.
42:31
No, I I love Canada. Canada does a lot of good
42:34
things. It is great.
42:34
Canada is a. Good.
42:35
Responsible universal healthcare we're.
42:37
Responsible for Trailer Park Boys, man.
42:39
Like I watched that like 90% of my nights.
42:44
OK, so it's test time. He didn't get to study for the
42:48
test because he was busy fucking a ghost on he.
42:50
Goes into a Nightmare on Elm Street type of alternate
42:53
dimension. Yeah.
42:54
Where he sees Mary Lou come out of the chalkboard.
42:57
I really wish we had cut to like what was happening in real time,
43:00
what everybody was seeing around him.
43:02
Thought we were going to get that but because like what
43:05
happens is she goes over there and she like touches his penis
43:09
and I, you know I think that he got like a hand job in the
43:13
middle of his test right there but.
43:14
That's why he turns in a blank test and runs away without
43:17
talking to his alive girlfriend. Yeah, he can't handle two women
43:22
at once. He's too average for that.
43:23
Yeah. So it's now out on the football
43:29
field, we're getting a montage of Alex just getting sacked
43:32
repeatedly in the most hilarious fashion possible.
43:34
It's football practice in the middle of the day.
43:36
Their field is just the yard in front of the school.
43:41
Yeah, there's no, I don't even see a goal post.
43:44
I don't see yard lines or anything like that.
43:46
Like I came from a poor ass school and we had a decent
43:50
little football. This is like when you go to play
43:53
like touch football with your family on Thanksgiving.
43:56
This is like the baseball field that my mom and dad made for me
43:58
whenever I was a kid in our backyard.
44:00
It's basically the. Same which is now our nephew's
44:05
four Wheeler course. No, that's the garden now turned
44:09
into a four Wheeler force. We carved out that where the
44:14
pool is over there. OK, yeah, yeah, so and we see
44:18
that the entire second string of the football team is the nerds,
44:22
and they're doing various things like tripping over their own
44:25
shoes and doing very bad form jumping jacks.
44:28
So that's how you know that they're nerds.
44:30
You know, but he's got a good point.
44:31
He's like, we wouldn't be doing so bad if they like split the
44:33
teams evenly. That's what you're supposed to
44:34
do during this year. You're not supposed to put all
44:36
the good people on one team. Yeah, well, it's a disservice to
44:39
everybody because nobody's like getting a fair practice.
44:43
Yeah, exactly. The yeah, the first stringers,
44:45
they're not having any real competition.
44:47
Not to be rude, but. Anyways, he is.
44:52
He's gonna go for it this time. It's one more play.
44:54
And Mary Lou goes, you can do it, Alex.
44:59
And then he does it. And then everybody is like, hey.
45:04
Yeah, everybody claps at him. Every time in this movie, every
45:08
single time in this movie that Mary Lou does something to make
45:10
him more popular. People react in the way in the
45:14
high school reunion episode of It's Always Sunny when they're
45:17
doing their freedom dance and you don't realize that.
45:20
It's like, yeah, you're right, yeah.
45:22
Hallucination at first. So I'm just like.
45:24
Yeah, Yeah, you're right, You're right.
45:29
I just kept waiting for the moment to like pull back
45:31
everything still like his Potbelly shirt on be like.
45:36
This like when I was watching this movie, I just thought like
45:38
basically it's the summation of and everybody clapped.
45:41
Yeah, because those people do literally clap.
45:44
Yeah, it's, I mean, you know, this, this boy's living his
45:48
dream here. He's in the locker room now.
45:49
Everybody's like, yeah, Alex, way to go.
45:51
Way to go, Alex. OK, so the bio teacher, Mr.
45:55
Walker, he's in the classroom. He is grading the test.
45:58
He doesn't even need to look through Alex's because.
46:00
It's blank, so he. Writes an F.
46:02
But then the F just gets erased. Yeah, the F disappears.
46:05
A lot of writing appears on the page, and an A+ appears and he's
46:09
like, what is this? And then there's an ice cream
46:12
stand in the classroom, and he goes, What?
46:16
Is this? Yeah, Yeah.
46:17
What the hell you all doing here?
46:19
How did this get here? Hey, Mary.
46:21
Lou stabs him with ice cream cones and turns him into a
46:26
sundae. I like that I do.
46:28
Like it? I don't understand why she went
46:30
this route with this particular person.
46:33
I think that it was a fat joke. Oh, that's mean.
46:36
I think it is, yeah. I think it's a little me, yeah.
46:40
Yeah. So let's see what happens next.
46:43
This is when Alice goes into the classroom and finds the dead
46:45
body. Not you wait.
46:50
Yeah, this is what happens. Yeah.
46:51
So Alex finds Mr. Walker's body because he goes to the classroom
46:55
and Mary Woo tells him the truth about what happened, or, and
46:59
everything about her, she's like, hey, I'm a demon.
47:00
I'm a ghost. Yeah, she's like, you're going
47:02
to need to hide the body because I can't do that part.
47:04
I feel like she could. Yeah, she's able to, like, do
47:07
all these other things, influence everything, kill
47:09
people. Do sex have murder?
47:13
I think she could hide the bodies, but, you know, she wants
47:16
to prove that Alex will do it for her.
47:18
And he just shoves Mr. Walker in the cabinet.
47:24
Yeah. And takes a single like single
47:27
ply napkin that he probably got from the cafeteria and smears
47:30
the blood and whip cream around the table.
47:33
Again, this guy just really doesn't get.
47:34
He's like, oh jeez, man, you killed him.
47:36
Wow. I guess I'll stuff in here.
47:37
Yeah. He's like, all right, cool, here
47:39
we go. After school.
47:42
Shane is hiding in Alex's back seat of his car.
47:45
I thought you were saying backpack.
47:50
Yeah. It's the same kind of physics
47:53
that how Mr. Walker fit in the cabinet.
47:57
Yeah, you're right in the backpack.
47:58
Yeah. But yeah, he's doing his, his
48:01
Malachi. What's his, what's the actor's
48:03
name? Courtney Gaines.
48:04
There you go. Yeah, he's a he's a good guy, by
48:06
the way. I like him, Yeah.
48:07
He's super cool. We he signed our copy even
48:11
though we're at like a horror convention.
48:12
He signed our copy of Can't Buy Me Love.
48:14
I think he still thinks that he knows me from.
48:16
Yeah. He's just like he insisted the
48:17
entire time. See you.
48:18
Again, man. And like, oh, yeah, yeah, you
48:21
too. And he's like, no.
48:22
And then he, like, did that three times eventually.
48:25
He's like, dude, I'm serious. Like, have I met you before?
48:28
It was a really weird experience.
48:30
It was fun though. Yeah, OK, yeah.
48:32
So he's like, really, they're kind of arguing about the whole
48:36
thing and about football and stuff like that.
48:39
And he's just really trying to hammer him about doing the whole
48:41
road trip thing again to Alex is I was just not really wanting to
48:45
do it. And Shane's going to be in a
48:47
downer. He's like, yeah, we're going to
48:48
die anyways. And it's kind of spooking Alex
48:50
because he thinks that he knows that he killed the body or
48:53
killed the Prince, the teacher, he killed somebody or something.
48:57
He. Killed a person.
48:58
Yeah, he's, he's suspicious, but whatever, he's now home.
49:01
He gets home and his sister goes, good, you're here.
49:06
Sister's so weird. Yeah, I was like, is that his
49:10
sister? Like, it was so weird.
49:11
Like every single one of their interactions was bizarre.
49:14
She kind of seemed similar in looks to Sarah too.
49:19
We don't have time to unpack that psychology.
49:21
No, God, you're right. Yeah, you're right.
49:23
So they lead him to the kitchen where he, it's his entire family
49:29
is so surprised he could get 100% on the test that they
49:32
arranged a surprise party for him, complete with decorations,
49:35
his favorite food, baked goods, whatnot.
49:37
And then we skip. We don't see the celebration,
49:40
but we get the idea that he was a grump the whole time because
49:44
he's dropping Sarah off at home. And he's, like, looking at his
49:46
watch, not talking to her. And she's, like, trying to talk
49:48
to him even though they had a fight last night because he
49:50
forgot their anniversary. And he said his entire life was
49:52
average and he hated it. And she's still trying, like,
49:56
really hard. And then she's like, just pull
49:57
over and let me out. I will walk home.
50:00
Yeah. And he goes, no, don't.
50:05
Yeah, he doesn't handle this well, He's not really.
50:08
He's got Mary Lou and a body on his mind right now.
50:10
Yeah. So he drops or she just leaves,
50:13
and then he goes to the high school again to actually bury
50:17
Mr. Walker. Walker out in the football.
50:20
Field. What a dumb.
50:22
Dumb. I know.
50:23
This dude is so fucking dumb. He's stupid as fuck.
50:26
Like I, I get it, he doesn't want to be accused of the murder
50:30
and he's already put his DNA everywhere, but like, be better
50:34
at aiding and abetting, you know what I mean?
50:37
Like do better. Well, he's out there and he's
50:40
digging up the hole, and as he's doing that, he looks and he sees
50:43
upstairs in the high school. Mary Lou's giving them a little
50:46
striptease. Yeah, I said that she encourages
50:48
him with her boobs. Yeah, I mean, hey dude it.
50:52
Works it. Works.
50:53
It works. They have sex with their
50:55
underwear on, and he says, all right, I'm gonna lay some ground
50:59
rules for this relationship. No murder, no calling my house.
51:05
Which sounds an awful lot like the plot of Fatal Attraction.
51:09
Yeah, you're right. Had we even seen her call the
51:11
house yet? She called as Mr. Walker.
51:14
That's how the family knew that he got 100% on the test.
51:17
Oh, I thought he could fake his voice.
51:19
Oh, I thought for sure that the school cause like hey man, like
51:22
your kids doing fucking good over here.
51:24
He's not average. Tell him he's not average.
51:28
So there's a game the next day and in the middle of the school
51:33
day, and Alex is subbing for Andrew because the coach was
51:37
like, Alex Gray, go out there, do your thing.
51:39
And then he wins and everybody cheers for him.
51:42
They're like, yeah, good child, kid.
51:44
Yeah, he fucking does it. Yeah, I love this scene where
51:47
he's being carried. It's just the way that it's
51:49
shot. It's just like being carried by
51:51
the whole team. And then he looks down and he
51:53
sees Mary Lou, who is one of the cheerleaders.
51:55
I wish they had dumped Gatorade over his head but since he's so
51:57
average instead of like the cooler, it's just like a
51:59
pitcher. If they would have done that, he
52:02
may have died of pneumonia because this was very cold
52:05
during the shooting of this apparently.
52:07
So then he finds out that he's on the honor roll, he's actually
52:10
the top of the honor roll. And when his guidance teacher
52:13
Misery Treats finds, it actually goes he cheated.
52:16
He absolutely cheated. Yeah, guys, she has no faith in
52:19
this guy. She challenged him to be better
52:22
and if he wanted to go to Med school to up his grades.
52:25
So what does he do? He up his grades.
52:26
She's like bullshit. Fuck that.
52:28
Yeah, and so she's getting ready to go talk to Mr. Walker.
52:32
She's like, do you know, she must be like, do you know that
52:35
he got into your computer and changed his grade?
52:37
Except she's intercepted and taken into the home EC room
52:41
where Mary Lou is like, you need a makeover real bad.
52:44
And by makeover, she means she's going to dump her with acid from
52:48
the battery of my. Car.
52:54
Then we kept to a student council meeting where they're
52:56
talking about both what the prom theme should be in a month and
53:01
also having football tryouts because again, is this how this
53:04
works in Canada? I guess so.
53:06
Thank you for clarifying that because I thought that this was
53:08
the prom committee and I thought Andrew hijacked like, while
53:11
we're on the subject, the football team, they they let
53:16
anybody on the team. I say we hold tryouts like this
53:19
is not the time and this is not the time or place to be talking
53:23
about this. But OK, student council makes
53:26
way more. Sense, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
53:27
That's that's what I assume it is.
53:30
They they hold a vote on it when?
53:33
They basically vote to do tryouts just to get Andrew to
53:36
shut up. Pretty much, yeah.
53:37
Nobody wants to stand or stand up soon, yeah.
53:40
And then they immediately do the tryouts like they immediately.
53:45
Have to try out. It's like off screen even.
53:47
I think what happened is like, Shane goes over to Alex is like,
53:50
dude, we're cut from the team. But no.
53:52
Shane is cut from the team. Alex isn't cut from the team.
53:54
He won the game, he didn't have to try.
53:56
Out. Yeah, exactly.
53:56
He's. Above average now.
53:58
Yeah, he's good. And then Shane's like, or not
54:00
Shane. Alex is like, what do you
54:01
fucking care anyways? You don't even like football.
54:03
Why do you even join the team? It's like because we're best
54:05
friends. Because we're bubbies.
54:07
Yeah, we're bubbies did. You forget.
54:09
We were like this, but now we're like this.
54:11
Everybody needs to know that Travis had his fingers crossed
54:13
and then he made. It crossed, yeah, they're
54:15
they're not connected anymore. So far away.
54:17
And then far. Away as they can get.
54:19
They're drifting apart. That's how you do that with your
54:22
fingers. OK, Jess is just showing off
54:26
with her fingers. Isn't that right that I can do
54:28
that but I can't do ear quotes? It is.
54:30
Thank you. You're average.
54:33
Oh no. Shane's like fucking Dick
54:37
because Alex is being kind of a Dick here.
54:39
And he's like, I don't fucking care about your problems, bro.
54:41
Yeah. He's like, bye.
54:43
Sucks to suck. So Alex has called to the home
54:46
mech room over the intercom. And then he goes there and he
54:50
finds the counselor's body and the ball is on him.
54:53
And it's so hot that him and Mary Lou have to make out.
54:56
Yeah, Mary Lou has a pie waiting for him, too.
54:58
More of a diner theme. I don't know, maybe she's just
55:00
like, wanted to have a diner. Yeah, I don't know.
55:05
She's maybe if she'd had some proper nurturing as a child, she
55:10
wouldn't be such a demon. Who knows?
55:12
Anyways, Shane is or no. Alex encounters Sarah in the
55:16
hallway. And she's try like he follows
55:20
her at first being like, are you still mad at me?
55:22
And she's like, what the like, are you not going to apologize?
55:25
He's like, I can't tell you what's going on.
55:27
And she's like, OK, cool. Then I guess we're done with
55:29
this conversation and walks. But like you can't say like I'm
55:33
sorry, but I can't tell you what happened and then just expect
55:36
that to be OK. Yeah, I mean, dude, you're also
55:39
like fucking a ghost on the side.
55:41
So yeah, come on man. Come on man, be better.
55:44
He goes home and once again his sister's like, good, you're
55:49
here. And the dad's like, all right,
55:52
gotta open up this bad boy. Pat's the garage door and it
55:56
comes up and oh boy, there's a motorcycle.
55:59
Oh boy, vampire motorcycle. Vampire motorcycle.
56:02
Yep. And so he's very excited about
56:05
that. And they're like, and now you
56:06
can go on your road trip with Shane and he's like, yeah.
56:09
Dude, I love the immediate because, like, they gift him the
56:12
motorcycle and they also gift him a leather jacket.
56:15
And then we immediately cut to him laying in his bed, shades on
56:19
in his zombies, playing saxophone because he's a cool
56:22
guy now. That's how you know he is a cool
56:24
guy. Yeah.
56:25
And then he gets cool. Dude gets put together, gets his
56:28
jacket on, and then he heads to the garage to get on his
56:31
motorcycle to drive to the high school.
56:32
But his dad's waiting. For him, his dad's, like Sarah,
56:36
declined her invitation to gift you this motorcycle.
56:39
It's another woman, isn't? It yeah, like one made him think
56:43
that and then like his. Dad's a player.
56:46
Dad may have been. I was like, yeah, I could have
56:49
fucked somebody while I was married to your mother, Coulda.
56:52
Coulda that I didn't, did I? Probably not.
56:55
Yeah, maybe not. I don't know.
56:57
Don't check the football field. Yeah, don't check the baseball
57:00
field. And then he's like, yeah, but
57:04
let me tell you something about these ladies.
57:07
You got to be careful with them, Alex, because ladies like that,
57:10
they tear your heart out and they that'll.
57:13
Be important later. Yeah, and they just, they, they
57:15
get there and then they make you feel bad and then tear your
57:18
heart out and think he's like cleaning his gun the entire
57:21
time. And he like, he points and aims
57:23
it at the wall. He's like, he has to like,
57:25
really restrained himself from pulling the trigger there.
57:28
And then Alex's like, OK, cool, Dad, thanks for the talk.
57:32
So he's at the high school? Yeah, Sarah.
57:35
Well, we cut to Sarah baking her like fifth dozen set of cookies.
57:41
Yeah. And she this stressed me out
57:43
because she just said that hot pan directly on that counter.
57:45
And I don't know what the countertop is made of, but she's
57:48
probably going to ruin whatever the finish is.
57:50
And it's just is very stressful. Yeah, very stressful.
57:52
I didn't like that. Yeah.
57:54
And she's talking to mom about the whole Alec situation and.
57:56
She's just like, yeah, her mom's like, I've never seen you bake
57:59
this many cookies at once. So Alex is burying Miss Richards
58:03
also in the football field. And then Andrew comes up.
58:06
What's he doing? Does he just hang out at the
58:08
football field at night? It's his life.
58:11
It really is his entire life. So he comes out and he starts
58:15
harassing Alex, but then another football player comes out and
58:19
tosses him a football and Andrew is just like his golden
58:22
retriever energy. He's like hell yeah.
58:24
Oh, catch that ball. And then the ball turns into a
58:26
dream. That's real, dude.
58:27
I like that. Yeah, I wish that we saw the on
58:31
screen death because it just cuts away to Alex and Mary Lou's
58:34
reaction and like. And yeah, I mean, it was Mary
58:38
Lou. Yeah, Jillian.
58:40
And Alex is like I told you, I couldn't do this anymore.
58:42
We're over. Yeah, and, you know, she tries
58:45
to tempt him with some more ghost sex, but he's like, I'm
58:48
out of here. That's it.
58:51
And so he tries to go apologize to Sarah the next day in the
58:56
hallway and asked her to prom in front of a whole group of
58:58
people. And everybody is actually, like,
59:00
clapping and cheering him on. And she goes, well, Leonard
59:03
Welch asked me out. And because Leonard Welch.
59:05
Leonard Welch. Welch.
59:07
Yeah. And then he's like a.
59:09
Great chorus behind her when she said Leonard Welch.
59:12
Oh my God, you're right. Yeah, everybody's super into
59:15
this here. And but then she walks by and
59:18
she's like, but I haven't said yes yet.
59:20
And everybody. Goes yeah.
59:24
Freda. Yep.
59:29
Yep. So they go to health class and
59:32
they watch a pro absence video and the video is starring Mary
59:37
Lou Maloney. The.
59:39
Sex Ed teacher was inappropriate.
59:40
She's like, all right, we're going to talk about sex.
59:43
And then she goes over there and runs her hands through Alex's
59:47
hair. She's a personal hygiene.
59:50
She called it personal hygiene. Sex, She also mentioned it.
59:54
Sex, she said. Sex Ed, right?
59:56
Or did she not? I don't know, she said.
59:57
Sex. It was health class and she was
59:59
talking about personal hygiene and then the the video was like
1:00:03
this young lady came to the city and was tempted by the devil and
1:00:07
she had sex with every man and died of chlamydia in two weeks.
1:00:10
Yeah, but the cool thing is it's Mary Lou that's on screen the
1:00:14
entire time. And then she singles out Alex
1:00:16
and she calls him out. Yeah.
1:00:18
And he like, come, she comes out of the video and he goes and
1:00:23
rips the reel from the video and runs out.
1:00:25
And once again, everybody in class goes yeah.
1:00:28
I know. I like, it's just, it's so funny
1:00:30
because yeah, it's I want to know everybody's reactions other
1:00:33
than yeah, because like, you can't be that.
1:00:35
He just like yelled, he's watching a sex Ed video and he
1:00:38
goes leave me alone. And then he stops it and runs
1:00:42
out of the room. Who hurt him?
1:00:45
Sarah, everybody he saw their. Yeah, man, like people.
1:00:49
The guidance counselor needs to check on him, but she's dead.
1:00:52
Yeah. This kid is just being failed by
1:00:55
everybody around him. We're a little dummy.
1:00:57
Yeah. So on his way out, two cops are
1:01:00
there, and they question him about Andrew, and he goes.
1:01:02
I wasn't friends with the guy. We just played football
1:01:04
together. And so the cops like write down
1:01:06
enemies. You know, but it's the truth.
1:01:09
They weren't friends. They.
1:01:11
Weren't friends. The only person that had a
1:01:13
problem was Andrew. Yeah, I was gonna say it was a
1:01:15
one sided fuse. Yeah, but I do think it's like
1:01:18
the cops, like right down enemies.
1:01:21
So Leonard and Sarah are discussing the prom and he's
1:01:24
got, he's like, don't worry, I've got a schedule.
1:01:27
It's gonna be cool. We're gonna do this, this, this.
1:01:29
He's got everything down to AT. Listen, it would be almost.
1:01:35
It is obnoxious, but it would be almost endearingly neurotic if
1:01:39
he wasn't like and I baked in 7 minutes of free time for.
1:01:43
Anything. For anything.
1:01:46
I don't even think he means sex either, I think he's like.
1:01:49
He's like, we can play a quick like dice game or something
1:01:54
like. That we could play go fish, we
1:01:57
could watch some hockey. Because Canada.
1:02:02
Yeah, OK. Yeah, there's, there's all kinds
1:02:06
of things you can do in Canada. Yeah.
1:02:09
We don't know your culture that well, guys, but we respect it.
1:02:11
Sorry. Yeah, sorry.
1:02:13
I know that your stairs are really steep things to love that
1:02:17
are listed. That's true and very narrow.
1:02:20
Yeah, narrow and steep. It's scary.
1:02:22
But she doesn't commit. She doesn't want to say
1:02:24
anything. And he's he, he's like, he's
1:02:26
like I get. It he's like, I get it, You're
1:02:27
still in love with your boyfriend.
1:02:29
Yeah. Also, there is a truck that was
1:02:32
headed to the football field to resort it.
1:02:34
And they started resorting it, and they found bodies.
1:02:37
So now, like, the cops and the news reporters and everybody are
1:02:40
all over. And Alex panics when he learns
1:02:42
about this. So he goes over to Shane's
1:02:44
house, tells him everything. And Shane's like, boy buddy, it
1:02:47
sure is a predicament. You should have told me soon.
1:02:50
How about we just drive down to Mexico?
1:02:53
We'll just evade the law. And then Alex is asleep.
1:02:57
And Shane puts his jacket over him.
1:03:00
I'm going to posit I think maybe Shane is actually in love with
1:03:03
him. I think Shane was like I.
1:03:05
Think it's more than just best friends.
1:03:07
Shane was like, OK, cool, man. Like, you want to go on the road
1:03:10
trip still? Like, if this is like how you
1:03:12
want to rationalize it, if that's what it takes for us to
1:03:15
do a sweet bro road trip, then that's what it'll be.
1:03:18
We got ghosts going on. OK, Sure.
1:03:20
Yeah, so Alex falls asleep because he's tired.
1:03:23
He's had a lot of going on. And Shane hears a ring at the
1:03:27
doorbell, and it is sister Leah who is there to check on Alex.
1:03:32
Yeah, and she's being a little flirty with Shane.
1:03:34
And Shane goes, boy, you sure are growing up, Leah.
1:03:38
And then, just as Alex's dad said, this woman ripped Shane's
1:03:45
heart out. Ripped Alex's best friend's
1:03:47
heart out. It's a pretty good.
1:03:48
In a way, Alex's own heart. Yeah, just boom.
1:03:53
Right through the chest grabs the heart.
1:03:56
Yep, and Alex wakes up and he goes well fuck.
1:03:59
Oh. Man.
1:04:00
So he goes home and again, pulling from Nightmare on Elm
1:04:04
Street, he's drinking all kinds of soda and caffeine pills, and
1:04:07
he takes his dad, gun and can. We talk about this segment for a
1:04:10
minute. It's a montage, but we get some
1:04:12
sweet hip hop music that is like 90s old school shit.
1:04:15
I like it. I thought it was really good.
1:04:17
It was like I was like, where did this come from?
1:04:19
Where has this been, this whole movie?
1:04:22
And I almost heard I had to write soda and caffeine pills
1:04:26
'cause I sure did write coke and pills.
1:04:27
And I was like, Nope, that's a very different movie.
1:04:29
Different combo, Yeah, yeah. So yeah.
1:04:32
He's he's, he's armed up. He's ready for anything that's
1:04:34
gonna walk in through the door there.
1:04:36
Mary Lou starts appearing and like the paintings and TV and
1:04:39
whatnot, so he's attacking those, but then the cops come in
1:04:42
and they're like, oh shit, he's got a gun.
1:04:43
So yeah. Because they found Shane's body.
1:04:46
Yeah. And they're like, OK, it's Alex.
1:04:48
I mean, we knew it was Alex all along, but it's Alex.
1:04:50
Yeah. Yeah, and I like, they don't
1:04:53
even knock on the door. They show up at the house and
1:04:54
they just shoot up the entire fucking house and then they open
1:04:58
the door. Oh, and we should mention the
1:05:00
cop is Larry, by the way, who is the guy that's been in all of
1:05:03
the other prom nights, but they arrest him and they take him to
1:05:07
jail. Yep, we cut to the kind of a
1:05:10
montage of the news, like talking about all the bodies
1:05:14
being found, Shane being found, his funeral happening, Alex
1:05:19
being accused of all of the murders.
1:05:21
And the principal, they're like, are you guys still gonna do
1:05:25
prom? And he's like, yeah, we're still
1:05:26
gonna do it. Hamilton High's got a lot of
1:05:28
shit. I mean, we had a fucking
1:05:30
principal with a gun, but I'm a principal and we're gonna do
1:05:32
this shit. I have no gun and nine fingers.
1:05:35
Yeah, I like how his, I don't know if you noticed, but the way
1:05:37
that his fingers bandage up, it's just like a finger, a
1:05:40
middle finger. Up at all times, yeah, he tries
1:05:42
to give like a peace sign, but. He can't, so it's just flipping
1:05:45
off the camera. It's like we're doing prom.
1:05:47
Fuck you. So Sarah's watching the news,
1:05:50
and she's despondent. And I was like, I think you
1:05:53
should go to prom. It'll make you feel better.
1:05:54
And she's like, no, it it really won't.
1:05:56
She goes, well, I'm telling you, you have to go to prom and you
1:05:58
have to go with Leonard Welch. Come on.
1:05:59
I already have an appointment for you at the salon.
1:06:01
Let's go. Dude, yeah, like, OK.
1:06:04
She also doesn't believe that Alex is a murderer.
1:06:07
Yeah, she's telling her mom about it.
1:06:08
And he's like, he's not that smart.
1:06:10
Yeah, so Mary Lou was at the jail and she kills the guards
1:06:15
and then basically threatens Sarah.
1:06:17
So that lures Alex out into an escape, and then he carjacks
1:06:22
Larry. Yeah, holds him hostages.
1:06:24
Like, all right, you're taking me to prom, buddy.
1:06:26
He's like, dude, I don't even have my tux.
1:06:28
Yeah, so Sarah and Leonard are at the prom.
1:06:33
She needs to go take a bathroom break.
1:06:34
Man, I I like this whole thing of having real bands at prom.
1:06:39
I wish that that was a thing when we were doing Proms,
1:06:41
because it's always cool in movies.
1:06:43
I don't know, was that a real thing that people had?
1:06:45
Wow. What's your stomach?
1:06:48
Oh man, yeah. I guess.
1:06:51
This rock band is pretty cool too.
1:06:53
It felt like a real like rock band too.
1:06:55
I like the they were. Giving me a real performance up
1:06:57
there. Yeah, the vague medley of ACDC
1:06:59
songs they seemed to be doing. It reminded me a lot they.
1:07:02
Changed in just enough to avoid any kind of a lawsuit it.
1:07:05
Reminded me a lot of the Prowler.
1:07:07
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So Sarah goes to the bathroom.
1:07:10
While she's in the bathroom, Leonard gets drawn to the AV
1:07:12
room, where he is killed by reels.
1:07:16
Yeah, yeah, he just gets wrapped up in it.
1:07:19
Yeah, poor Leonard. Outside, Alex is cuffing up
1:07:23
Larry and the radio is calling for him.
1:07:25
So he shoots the radio and there he goes.
1:07:28
Oh man. Sarah comes out of the bathroom
1:07:31
to find Leonard and Mary Lou in the like AV room and so she's
1:07:38
freaking out while simultaneously Alex comes in and
1:07:41
ruins prom for everyone else. Shit, this dude just walks in
1:07:43
the prom with a gun and fires it until the ceilings.
1:07:46
Like don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you.
1:07:47
Just where's Sarah? Dude, you could have just asked
1:07:50
people on the fucking microphone.
1:07:52
This is where you see Ron Oliver's Degrassi writing come
1:07:55
in. Oh my God, Yeah, you're probably
1:07:58
right. I mean, I'm.
1:07:59
Absolutely right. Do not question me on that.
1:08:02
Well, I think that the, the board at the school, we're
1:08:06
paying attention like this guy's principal material.
1:08:10
He he can do it. You know, let's keep him on the
1:08:12
short list whenever that opening comes up.
1:08:15
All he's missing is a little hip flask.
1:08:17
Yeah, yeah. So the ghost of Mary Lou is
1:08:21
chasing Sarah through the hallways, and then she makes it
1:08:24
onto the prom stage. And then Mary Lou just erupts
1:08:28
from the prom stage from below and holds Sarah up with
1:08:31
Chokehold. Just ruining that gym all over
1:08:34
again. I know.
1:08:35
And Alex says no, take me, leave everybody else alone.
1:08:40
And Sarah's, like I knew where she got.
1:08:43
Me, yeah. And then he's even like, I think
1:08:45
that he is like, he means it. He's like, I love you, Mary Lou.
1:08:49
Like, yeah, let's go. Let's do it.
1:08:50
And like, he's like, blowing off Sarah the entire time.
1:08:53
Like, she's, like, trying to say things to him, like, no, no.
1:08:55
Like, take me, Mary Lou. Like I love you, Like, well,
1:08:58
let's hang out together. And she says it's not who you
1:09:02
came with, it's who takes you home.
1:09:04
I love it, glad we get that. Yep.
1:09:06
So they they transport to hell and I don't know how, but Sarah,
1:09:11
she calls. In the hole in the floor.
1:09:13
I oh. OK, it like collapses as well.
1:09:16
The the structure was not it is irreparably, irreparably
1:09:19
damaged. So she goes down into a
1:09:21
nightmare where Shane's ghost tries to kill her because he
1:09:25
says that she just ruins everything.
1:09:26
Even in the afterlife, Shane can't have Alex to himself.
1:09:30
Yeah, he didn't. His house and get shit on.
1:09:32
His friendship got shit on. His heart was shit on.
1:09:35
Yeah, you shit on my heart and she goes wrong.
1:09:40
Please draw the cover for this as like an homage to Can't Buy
1:09:43
Me Love. OK, I can try that.
1:09:48
Yeah. All right, so she encounters a
1:09:52
like the entire, all the people that have died so far are
1:09:55
zombies now and they're chasing her.
1:09:58
She encounters the jukebox also who is in hell and it's just
1:10:01
shooting like razor discs at her.
1:10:03
I kind of love this one. Yeah, it was kind of cool.
1:10:05
I like. The shoebox finds a
1:10:06
flamethrower. Where?
1:10:08
Where? Why the hell?
1:10:10
I think they try also so she like does the and then she goes
1:10:15
into the hell prom and she still has a flamethrower and I think
1:10:18
they're doing an alien homage cuz she's like get away from him
1:10:23
you bitch. Yeah, I could see that.
1:10:25
And she's got the flamethrower. And then Mary Lou was like, why
1:10:28
are you so mad? And she goes.
1:10:29
I don't get mad, I bake. Dude.
1:10:34
And I was like, man, that would have been so cool.
1:10:38
I know they gave you blue balls with that one right there.
1:10:40
Actually cooked if that had worked.
1:10:42
She was locked and loaded with it too.
1:10:44
She had the perfect one liner for it.
1:10:46
Dude, it was great. It was great.
1:10:49
So she drops it. And The thing is, is that Alex
1:10:52
has been strapped to the king throne because Mary Lou is about
1:10:54
to kill him for realsies. And the flamethrower is still
1:10:57
like giving off like, you know, a little bit of sparks as Sarah
1:11:01
and Mary Lou are fighting. And Alex is like Sarah, Sarah,
1:11:05
Sarah. And eventually she manages to
1:11:08
knock Mary Lou down and set her on fire.
1:11:11
And then Alex and Sarah find a car and Sarah above average
1:11:17
girlfriend she hotwires this car and they back to the future
1:11:21
their way out. Like did you mention like the
1:11:24
bomb being put in her chest? Because like they, Sarah ends up
1:11:27
with the she finds a bomb and just like, stuffs it in Mary
1:11:29
Lou's dress. And that's why, gonna be
1:11:31
completely honest, I miss that. OK.
1:11:34
I just thought I thought like the little sparks from the
1:11:37
bullet torch Cotter. No, no, she had a bomb and she
1:11:39
slipped it in her dress. Yeah.
1:11:40
It's hell. And it blew up, Yeah.
1:11:42
Yeah, if you're gonna be in hell, like use it to your
1:11:45
advantage I guess. Yeah, man, there's all kinds of
1:11:47
tools on there, I guess, like just dancing, but there's also
1:11:50
flamethrowers and bombs and stuff.
1:11:52
So anyway, they get to the car, they get back to present time,
1:11:56
things seem really great, they're hungry and they need to
1:12:00
call their parents. So they pull up to a diner and
1:12:05
Alex gets out and he's an average man.
1:12:08
He forgot that a payphone requires payment.
1:12:11
He. Thought that they had quarters,
1:12:12
which is what the average man would keep on him.
1:12:13
But no, this one requires Dimes. So he goes over to say you got
1:12:17
any Dimes? This takes Dimes and.
1:12:19
She's like, baby, I am a dime, Yeah.
1:12:23
Because Mary Lou, Yeah. Tears her heart out, too.
1:12:26
Yeah, from behind in the back seat, right through her chest.
1:12:30
And. Then Alex is like freaking out
1:12:32
and he's going to like other cars saying, Oh my God, she
1:12:35
killed her. And then he realizes that like,
1:12:37
nobody can hear him. Nobody's.
1:12:38
Reacting. Yeah, he's.
1:12:40
Already dead. Yeah, he's like, you win and
1:12:43
then like we get a crane shot going all the way out and yeah,
1:12:47
I don't know, dude. I mean, no one married.
1:12:50
She's like, well, never mind. She was trying to kill him.
1:12:52
She had him strapped up, and she had, like, a drill thing coming
1:12:54
to his head on the prom stage. So I thought that it was going
1:12:57
to be all like, you know, sex and stuff.
1:12:59
But no, I think she really just wants me to die.
1:13:01
OK, OK, So that's how that movie ends, people.
1:13:07
It's still a Ford for me. If they had made this a
1:13:10
different person, like if it was just Hamilton High anthology,
1:13:14
I'd be fine with this. I still think it would be a very
1:13:17
silly movie, but I would be able to have more fun with it.
1:13:20
But they're besmirching Mary Lou Milani's name.
1:13:23
I can't handle it. OK, I'm going to bump it to A5.
1:13:27
Look, I am in favor of movies, especially like series, like
1:13:33
consistently going more off the rails.
1:13:35
And this movie goes off the rails hard in a direction that I
1:13:39
find endearing and charming and entertaining.
1:13:43
It's not a good movie, and I repeat that like it's not well
1:13:47
made, it's not well written, it's not well acted, but God
1:13:51
damn it, it's got heart and it's got charm and that's enough to
1:13:55
win me over to five at least. OK, so new average 4.5.
1:14:00
Talia was very sleepy during this movie.
1:14:03
She was sleepy. She covered her eyes with her
1:14:05
blanket at one point, so she really didn't want to watch it.
1:14:09
I think she was also kind of upset that Marilyn Maloney was
1:14:12
not that bitch in this one. Yeah, Talia was, I think kind of
1:14:16
being an extra harsh on things as a result of that.
1:14:19
So I think she's going to give it a four, one for each of the
1:14:22
legs that she kicked while she dreamt.
1:14:25
OK, All right, that's fair. We also had to tuck her in at
1:14:28
one point. Yeah, well, that was because of
1:14:30
the rain. Oh yeah, that's true.
1:14:32
Yeah. What was Zoe's?
1:14:34
Who was Zoe's ultimate warrior? I guess this is for Leah cuz as
1:14:42
soon as he walks in and she's like good you're here, come with
1:14:45
me to the kitchen. OK, Yeah, you're right.
1:14:48
Yeah, that happened. That happened.
1:14:52
OK, Yeah, sure. I mean it could also be Sarah
1:14:55
because she makes a lot of food. Zoe doesn't make the food.
1:14:59
Zoe used the food. That's true.
1:15:00
That's true. OK, OK, let's do who's you
1:15:07
relate to. I guess, Leonard, in that like I
1:15:15
always want to bake in a bunch of extra time into like when I
1:15:17
can leave for things to make sure that like in case you run
1:15:20
into traffic or things happen or like, oh, parents want to take a
1:15:23
bunch of extra pictures. Like I get that.
1:15:26
I get that neurotic rescheduling sense.
1:15:28
All right, that's fair, man. I I guess I'll, dude, I don't
1:15:38
know, I guess I'll, I'll relate to Alex in the sense that like I
1:15:48
didn't, I didn't have the best grades.
1:15:50
I didn't do terrible, but I, you know, I was there in like the CB
1:15:55
range and I ain't going to Med school with them grades.
1:16:01
That's, you know, that's the truth right there.
1:16:04
You know what they call a doctor with AD average?
1:16:07
A doctor? Yep.
1:16:08
Yeah. Well, I think you need more than
1:16:10
that to be able to qualify to get into that school to begin
1:16:13
with though. OK, So what are we officially
1:16:19
doing for our timeline? What was the one about Canada
1:16:25
again? Is this how this works in
1:16:26
Canada? Yeah, let's do that.
1:16:32
Is this how this works in Canada?
1:16:33
How? This works in Canada.
1:16:35
OK, cool. And then?
1:16:37
Dream sequel dream. Sequel.
1:16:39
OK. I would honestly, like, I would
1:16:43
not be mad about like a continuing Hamilton High
1:16:48
anthology, just not make it Mary Lou, you know what I mean?
1:16:52
OK, like other characters from the past few movies, let's.
1:16:57
Just see like then like somebody whose life gets fucked up as
1:17:00
like a side character as the course of everything that
1:17:03
happens. And then their ghost, when they
1:17:05
die is like pissed like somebody that like, you know, maybe we
1:17:09
didn't notice, but when the stage collapsed, they were like
1:17:12
impaled by a board and they died.
1:17:14
Or you can just get some of the victims from the past movies
1:17:16
even too. Like you can get Liu, who had
1:17:18
his head chopped off in the first one.
1:17:19
You can get we can get the nerdy dude from the second one that
1:17:27
like got shocked by the computer.
1:17:29
That would be how you'd get his actor back into the movie.
1:17:32
OK, he just reprised his role in Four.
1:17:35
Nerdy sex fest, you mean? Yeah, he was kind of a sex fest.
1:17:39
He was definitely a sex fest. Yeah, I that's right.
1:17:41
He did solicit a blowjob for Prom Queen.
1:17:45
OK. And then, I don't know, there's
1:17:47
other people too. Yeah.
1:17:50
I mean you can get Alex from this one with Shane.
1:17:53
There are a lot of options. So you know who would be really
1:17:57
fun as this though? Who Andrew as the next one
1:18:01
because he was like the popular guy in high school and he died
1:18:04
as a result of his like rival. And so he wants to like, find a
1:18:08
way back into the into Hamilton High so he can relive his glory
1:18:11
days. He'd be perfect for that, him or
1:18:13
Shane, because Shane would also be like, I was never popular and
1:18:15
I just had a shit friend who shot on my heart and you know, I
1:18:19
just want a good friend and the person doesn't want to be
1:18:21
friends with the ghost. So they're like, he just, he
1:18:23
gets mad and kills people because of that.
1:18:25
Yeah, there's plenty of options to go with.
1:18:28
OK, I like that. I like that.
1:18:30
All right. I guess it's some for reviews
1:18:34
though, right? Yeah, OK.
1:18:35
What do you have? Well.
1:18:39
Whenever I last checked, we didn't have any listener
1:18:43
reviews. No.
1:18:44
So let me double check it cuz as a result of that I pulled 2 IMDb
1:18:49
reviews. So I need to know if I need to
1:18:51
read one or two and it appears as though we will have to do
1:18:57
that. So let's do that.
1:18:59
All right. The first review will be on the
1:19:03
positive side. OK, I'm excited to hear this.
1:19:05
It's. A 10 out of 10.
1:19:07
Wow. Reviewed back in 2005.
1:19:09
Humor and horror mingled well. Thanks Canada.
1:19:14
I'm a bit surprised by all the negative reviews of this film.
1:19:17
It's got more wet and grew than 90% of the films of its genre
1:19:21
and era. Yet it's called crap, which says
1:19:24
little for everything else. Yes, Prom Night 3 is very
1:19:27
juvenile, but so is the intended audience.
1:19:29
The evil heroes of horror of the late 80s and early 90s generally
1:19:33
play to such tastes. The melody is easy to like.
1:19:36
The chemistry between he and his girlfriend reminds me of that of
1:19:39
the lead and his girlfriend in Fright Night, as is the actress
1:19:43
portraying Mary Lou. The film doesn't pretend to be
1:19:46
anything more than AUSA Up All Night flick, but the dialogue,
1:19:50
style and gore of the movie are all above average.
1:19:53
I think of Girlfriend from Hell as the prototypical decent USA
1:19:57
up all night film, and this one is definitely in a class above.
1:20:01
The horror just erupts from nowhere in this film, like the
1:20:04
scene in which the principal cuts off his finger and winds
1:20:07
starts blowing all over, slamming doors shut.
1:20:10
My reaction to this was a big laugh.
1:20:12
What a great madcap way to foreshadow.
1:20:15
I love films in which the hell just starts right away and keeps
1:20:19
going until the end. Evil Dead 2 is probably the best
1:20:21
example of that, and I laughed a lot while watching Prom Night 3.
1:20:25
But perhaps 1 needs a rather free and yet very juvenile sense
1:20:29
of humor to get the most of out of it.
1:20:32
If you ever snickered at humor and one liners of Freddy
1:20:35
Krueger, Angela Baker, Oregon, even the Wishmaster, you will
1:20:38
probably like this incarnation of Mary Lou.
1:20:40
In any case, this film is very representative, very
1:20:45
representative of its time and genre, in good ways and bad,
1:20:48
depending on your take. That lessons right there really
1:20:52
sums up what I was trying to get at.
1:20:53
Yeah, I I definitely I feel that like 90s up all night like that
1:20:57
USA up all night. It definitely has, especially
1:20:59
like the way they play the music, the, like, anthem in the
1:21:04
morning when he wakes up in the school.
1:21:06
Yeah, that's what it made me think of, is when you fall
1:21:08
asleep with the TV on in the like, early, early, early
1:21:11
morning after all the movies have run all night.
1:21:13
Yeah, this. I got like Nick at night feels
1:21:16
from this. Yeah.
1:21:17
And I mean, I, I said it has a sense of humor.
1:21:21
I fully agree with that. And I do see, I do see the
1:21:25
homages to things like Nightmare on Elm Street.
1:21:27
Yeah. And.
1:21:28
Angela Baker, you know, that's a good thing that actually tracks.
1:21:31
Like she kind of becomes the type of character that Angela
1:21:33
becomes in the Sleep Away Cam movies.
1:21:36
Opposite end of the spectrum, but yes.
1:21:38
Yeah, yeah. Like similar but different.
1:21:41
Yeah. OK, well, there, there's,
1:21:44
there's plenty of things to like about this movie.
1:21:45
See. All right, so here's some bad
1:21:48
stuff. Four out 10.
1:21:49
Amazingly, not the last in the series.
1:21:52
This is reviewed in 2019. Just how silly does tongue in
1:21:57
cheek horror Prom Night 3 get? Well, ghostly antagonist Mary
1:22:00
Lou pins a man's hands to a countertop with ice cream
1:22:03
cornets and pushes A whisk through his skull.
1:22:07
That's stupid enough for you? Or how is about the scene in
1:22:10
which she throws a football, the ball turning into a drill that
1:22:13
screws her victim to a goal post?
1:22:15
The Last Kiss is full of such nonsense, making it a mindless
1:22:18
way to pass the time, but not a scary one, nor a particularly
1:22:22
funny one. Directors Ron Oliver and Peter R
1:22:24
Simpson keep a brisk pace and manage a few impressive shots.
1:22:29
I love the camera careening down corridors, but they are unable
1:22:33
to get the balance of horror and comedy right with the gags
1:22:36
falling flat. The announcements over the
1:22:38
school are cringe worthy and suppose it scares, too comical
1:22:42
to ever be disturbing. It all flashes past the eyes
1:22:45
easy enough, but the film's frivolous nature and an ending
1:22:48
that feels like an afterthought leaves one wondering what was
1:22:51
the point? OK, that's interesting that the
1:22:55
thing, some of the things it didn't like or some of the
1:22:57
things I did. Yeah, me too.
1:22:59
And I will say, like some of the humor that came over the
1:23:01
announcements, yeah, that was cringe worthy.
1:23:03
Like I didn't like the commentary about the the girls
1:23:05
weightlifting team. That was just.
1:23:08
No, that wasn't one of them that I thought was funny was whenever
1:23:12
it was like, after Alex did well at practice and everybody in the
1:23:15
locker room was like, yeah, you did good.
1:23:16
And Andrew confronts him. And then Andrew's like,
1:23:18
interrupted because the intercom is like, Andrew, please come to
1:23:22
the principal's office. Your mother brought you lunch
1:23:24
like. That's kind of.
1:23:27
Sweet. Yeah, this is kind of funny.
1:23:28
It's like this big bad ass guy is like, oh, your mommy brought
1:23:30
you lunch, OK. OK.
1:23:33
All right, yeah, I mean, I get it.
1:23:34
Like, you know, this movie is, it doesn't excel at a lot of the
1:23:37
things that it goes for, but I think it it's sincere in its
1:23:41
attempts and that that does it for me.
1:23:44
I don't feel like there's a lot of passion behind this,
1:23:46
actually. You don't think so?
1:23:47
No, OK, that's fair. So there are a lot of words I
1:23:50
would use to describe it, including positive words, but
1:23:54
sincere is not one. I think sincere and passion are
1:23:57
two different things. Like he like sincerely meant to
1:24:00
do a good job, but it doesn't mean he like put everything he
1:24:03
had in. It I think it was more apathetic
1:24:05
than anything. I don't.
1:24:06
Think you can do it? Really banked on this.
1:24:09
Like he did prom night too. And then he's like, I wrote this
1:24:11
one because I want to do a third one or a second one in his
1:24:15
original case. So like, it's not like he did
1:24:18
this because of a paycheck. Like he wanted to do this.
1:24:22
I'm happy for him. I'm happy.
1:24:25
Hey, man, he's got a good career.
1:24:26
Now he's doing. He's directing Lindsay Lohan in
1:24:29
Netflix Christmas movies. Come on.
1:24:30
Did he direct it or write it? OK, yeah, he did the screenplay.
1:24:34
I don't know if he directed it, OK, but either way, he fucking
1:24:37
did shit like that, you know? That's that's impressive.
1:24:39
He did good. I'm proud of you, buddy.
1:24:42
OK. So I think that's it for COM
1:24:44
night three. Yeah.
1:24:44
Mm, hmm. OK, so that means that we move
1:24:48
on to next week's. Yep.
1:24:49
And next week's is actually what I had originally wanted to do
1:24:52
for to be or not to be. But Travis insists we've watched
1:24:55
it. We have I we haven't.
1:24:56
We've watched things with Josh Hutcherson in it.
1:24:59
I don't feel like I've watched this one, do you?
1:25:00
Want me to tell you how I know that we watched this?
1:25:03
Remember that night that we both ordered Chinese food and we got
1:25:08
sick and we started throwing up and tell you got so mad at the
1:25:10
toilet that she started barking at it?
1:25:12
That was like 12 years ago. We were watching detention that
1:25:16
night. I have no memory at.
1:25:18
All that's the reason that that's burned into my brain,
1:25:19
because we watched that movie that night and I now associate
1:25:23
detention with throwing up that Chinese food and our dog getting
1:25:26
mad about it and barking at the toilet.
1:25:29
All I remember is us taking turns throwing up because we had
1:25:31
a single bathroom at that time. Yep.
1:25:34
OK, well, and anyway, we're watching detention.
1:25:38
It's the end of the month, so I don't know if things will like
1:25:41
roll over at the beginning of the month, but it for sure is on
1:25:43
TV right now. OK, so that's what that's what
1:25:46
we're gonna talk about next week.
1:25:48
All right, And be sure to check our social media and I'll update
1:25:51
where to watch. Yeah.
1:25:52
OK. All right.
1:25:53
Well then I guess we'll we'll continue prom month with that
1:25:57
next week. So thanks everybody for being
1:25:59
here. We appreciate y'all sticking
1:26:01
around. We would like to shout out our
1:26:05
patrons over on the Patreon. All right, we have Joe.
1:26:08
Pregatron. As is his name.
1:26:10
Amber, Michael Ward, Zombie, Tyler, Chad, Johnny and Jason.
1:26:15
Thank you guys for being Patreons.
1:26:17
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:26:19
All right. Yeah.
1:26:20
You guys are not average. You guys are above average.
1:26:24
Cuz yeah, you know, you're not Alex.
1:26:27
You're not like him. If you want to be an average fan
1:26:29
though. Above average if you're showing
1:26:33
us support other ways like rating us on whatever platform,
1:26:36
subscribing or falling on whatever platform.
1:26:39
It really it really does actually make a difference with.
1:26:41
That it makes us above average. Don't, please don't make us be
1:26:44
Alex here, people. Yeah, let us rise above.
1:26:47
Be our Mary Lou's in. The situation otherwise, we'll
1:26:49
not we'll end up burying all of our podcast episodes in the
1:26:52
football field, and that's just illogical.
1:26:55
Yeah, maybe. A lot of reasons.
1:26:57
Maybe you want that, maybe you don't.
1:26:59
I don't know it'll happen. Make your choice.
1:27:03
You're gonna also find us on social media.
1:27:04
We're on Instagram and threads at least favorite scary movie
1:27:06
podcast. We're on Blue sky at least
1:27:08
favepod. Our website's What's your least
1:27:10
favorite scary movie.com and you can e-mail us at least favorite
1:27:13
scarymovie@gmail.com. Yeah.
1:27:14
All right, so we'll see you guys next week.
1:27:17
Thanks for sticking around, y'all.
1:27:18
Yeah, bye. I hope you guys heard Jessie's
1:27:34
growling tummy during the whole. Thing that was embarrassing.