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Pleasure Revolution: Empowering Couples One Sex Toy at a Time · The Diva Details

• 0:00
  Welcome to the Diva Details. Welcome to the Diva Details.
• 0:05
  Where bold, confident women embrace life unapologetically.
• 0:10
  From love and sex to wellness and reinvention. We keep it raw, real and powerful.
• 0:17
  No filters, no limits. Just fearless conversations to help you thrive.
• 0:23
  Let's dive in with Diva Mia and Diva Cat.
• 0:32
  Well hello diva cat hello diva mia
• 0:35
  how are you good look at you it's all glowing i'm
• 0:38
  happy yes weekend was great huh it
• 0:41
  was it was a good weekend yes me too a lot of family in town though i'm really
• 0:45
  exhausted really it's fun yeah well i know you and you told me you talked to
• 0:51
  a your cousin right i met my cousin she'd be living here for 20 years and this
• 0:57
  is the first time we met and talked deep.
• 1:00
  Oh, wow. So what'd you guys talk about? Of course, you know, holidays.
• 1:06
  All the toys. All the toys. This is come up just like the walk in the morning.
• 1:12
  You know, we get up, we're waiting for a walk because she's like, you know, she stay over.
• 1:16
  And also this popped up. I was like. Literally popped up, huh?
• 1:20
  Literally popped up. Wow. I told her about our podcast.
• 1:23
  Oh, so you guys talked about sex toys, huh? Talked about sex toys.
• 1:27
  And what kind of sex toys?
• 1:28
  The extension. Extension, what do you mean? The penis extension.
• 1:33
  There's a penis extender? That's what I said. I was like, there is?
• 1:37
  And she was like, oh, my husband was surprised me with it. And I'm loving it. I mean.
• 1:42
  Really? Yeah, she loves it, she said.
• 1:45
  Wow. Uh-huh. She said they've been married for 32 years.
• 1:51
  Modern technology. I'm telling you. I gotta love it. I know.
• 1:55
  And that's why we talk about the extender the whole time. I've never used one.
• 1:59
  Me either. I don't know what it looks like. Wow. So let's dive into that.
• 2:04
  So what does it look like? Do you know? No.
• 2:06
  All right. Well, let me Google real quick. Yes.
• 2:09
  You'll do that. So a penis extender.
• 2:13
  Wow. It's actually, it's kind of pointed. There's multiple kinds.
• 2:16
  You can actually have a penis wrap.
• 2:18
  Oh, wow. That wraps around the whole penis. Uh-huh. You can have a little thing
• 2:23
  that looks kind of like a stick that goes under the penis. Uh-huh.
• 2:27
  It vibrates, so it hits your G spot. Uh-huh. You can also get one with a rose on it.
• 2:32
  So not only is it an extender, it's also a clitoral stimulation.
• 2:35
  Oh, my God. You can also get one that wraps around the guy's balls and stimulates
• 2:40
  the balls. At the same time, it has a G-spot extender. At the same time,
• 2:44
  it stimulates your clitoris.
• 2:46
  And then you can also get one that goes in the butt at the same time. Oh, my God.
• 2:51
  I know. They've got it all.
• 2:54
  I never thought such a thing. I thought the roses was enough. Wow.
• 2:59
  So for all these ladies out there that have these small penis men, we got a solution.
• 3:07
  I know. She said she never complained before. They're together for 30 plus years and three kids.
• 3:13
  But now all the kids are out of the house. So they were like exploring each
• 3:17
  other, she said. So now they're playing with toys. She said it was the best.
• 3:21
  Best sex ever penis extender. Uh-huh.
• 3:24
  She said it was the best. I'm loving it. And he goes, my husband just surprised
• 3:28
  her for like their 30th anniversary or something.
• 3:31
  And next thing they know, she was like, hmm.
• 3:34
  Wow. And now she has to have it every time? Yeah. She was like, yeah.
• 3:38
  Wow. She's loving it. She said, the best part is when the dog is styled.
• 3:43
  Doggy style with the extender on. Mm-hmm. Huh.
• 3:47
  So does her extender, does she go that deep and tell you if it stimulates the clit too?
• 3:53
  She knows that, but we have the cousin that very, very, I don't know what you
• 3:57
  guys talk about, blah, blah, blah. You know, we can take much.
• 4:00
  Oh, so you had somebody that was cock blocking your conversation.
• 4:04
  Right. So it was around the tables.
• 4:07
  Only friends, only one of my cousins and mine that very open-minded about it.
• 4:13
  The other four ladies was like, they don't want to hear about it.
• 4:15
  Yeah, some ladies don't want to talk about it. That's why we talk about it.
• 4:19
  Yeah, but they're doing it. I know they're doing it. Oh, I'm sure they're doing it.
• 4:22
  They just don't want to talk about it. Yeah, I know they're doing it.
• 4:25
  Which means they're doing it, but they're probably not enjoying it.
• 4:28
  Probably. Because either that, they don't know what to do with it.
• 4:31
  We need to give them a lesson.
• 4:32
  Here's what I found. When you start to really enjoy sex, you want to talk about
• 4:37
  it so you can enjoy it more and find new ways to enjoy it more. That's what I found.
• 4:40
  Now, granted, there are some prudish people that don't want to talk about it.
• 4:43
  They're very embarrassed by it.
• 4:44
  Right. But I also tend to find those are the people that aren't really enjoying
• 4:48
  it a lot. Yeah. I need to get one of those.
• 4:50
  What? The extender. Oh, a penis extender. So you're going to get a penis extender.
• 4:56
  So did she tell you how big her husband was?
• 5:00
  No, she didn't say much. She didn't go down there. Just to say extender.
• 5:03
  You got to have the extender. You got to have the extender. So everybody could use it.
• 5:07
  That's what she said. Oh, we're going to throw this on our podcast. Yeah.
• 5:10
  We're going to throw this on our Amazon page, too. Yeah. See, let's take a survey.
• 5:15
  Any ladies out there that haven't used it, give me pros and cons.
• 5:18
  And I bet it's different depending on the size of the man, too.
• 5:22
  I think so, too. Because there were some that go around girth-wise,
• 5:25
  and then there were some that go around that just extend it.
• 5:29
  And the extension's really not, it's not like it makes it a foot long, ladies.
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  It's just, it makes it so that four or five inches in, there's a little extension
• 5:40
  with a little vibration on the tip. so it's actually touching your G-spot.
• 5:44
  That's what it is. Because everyone's G-spot, I mean, ladies,
• 5:47
  you realize your G-spot's not very far in. It's only three to four inches inside you.
• 5:51
  That's about, mine's not that much. Which is why you need a five to six inch man.
• 5:54
  Oh, I see. Because then they're touching your G-spot when they get in. I see that.
• 6:01
  Yeah. So if you have a man that's only three inches or four inches,
• 6:05
  which I'm sorry if you do, then they're not hitting your G-spot.
• 6:10
  Oh, okay. And if you have a man that's eight or nine inches,
• 6:13
  seven or eight inches in, there's another spot by the cervix that's also very excitable.
• 6:18
  So it's not the G spot, but it's another spot that they can hit.
• 6:22
  Oh, wow. Maybe someone never need to extend it, need to use the extender if you have enough.
• 6:28
  I think even with the seven-inch man, because the seven-inch man,
• 6:33
  it'll hit things inside, but they kind of pass. So they might miss the G spot.
• 6:37
  Oh, wow. I don't know. So what other position can you do with that,
• 6:41
  you know? You can do all kinds of, you can do every position with the extender.
• 6:45
  Is it really? Oh, yeah. Even missionary is better with the extender. Oh, wow. Yeah.
• 6:50
  I've not done the extender, but I had a cock ring. So have you used a cock ring before?
• 6:56
  Mm-mm. There's different types of cock rings, too. Oh, my God.
• 6:59
  I told you I never used toys. Okay.
• 7:01
  So, ladies, today we're going to cover all the toys that you can use with a man.
• 7:04
  So there's different types of cock rings. So the cock rings actually go around
• 7:07
  the penis, and some of them will also go around the ball sack.
• 7:10
  There's different types of cock rings. Some of them make the guys last longer,
• 7:14
  too. Oh, wow. Because it keeps blood flow in the penis, and it makes them harder.
• 7:19
  So you get the cock ring on, and then...
• 7:22
  On top of the cock rings, a lot of them have a vibrator. Now,
• 7:25
  these are toys for women, not toys for men on men. These are toys for women.
• 7:29
  On the cock ring, it'll have a vibrator, right?
• 7:33
  This vibrator goes, when they're
• 7:35
  doing missionary style, it goes right up against your clitoris. Oh, wow.
• 7:39
  If you're having difficulty, let's say your man's not very good at oral sex
• 7:44
  or he doesn't do it, this is the perfect thing to get.
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  Because what will happen is as they're going in and out, it'll stimulate your clitoris.
• 7:51
  Okay and as your clitoris gets stimulated get turned
• 7:54
  on and then let's say he doesn't last very long uh-huh speaking
• 7:57
  from experience i had one of these he finished off plus it stimulates the man
• 8:02
  so they might come earlier too but he finished off and then he just laid on
• 8:06
  top of me with the clitoris vibrator
• 8:09
  and it finished me off wow that's amazing so you can have an orgasm,
• 8:15
  after they're done, which is nice.
• 8:18
  I know. Yeah. So he's still stimulating me any other ways, but yeah,
• 8:23
  he just laid there on top of me, and yeah, and that was missionary position.
• 8:26
  So you could have like 10 orgasms in one time then. You could have an orgasm before sex.
• 8:31
  You could have sex toys before sex. You could have sex toys during sex.
• 8:35
  You can have sex toys after sex.
• 8:37
  All right, it's time to clear out the house. Kids, go to sitters.
• 8:42
  Kids, go to your babysitter. That's right. Time to clear the house.
• 8:46
  That's right. So I would say that if you're going to use sex toys,
• 8:50
  one of the things is it is going to really empower you sexually.
• 8:55
  Your self-awareness is going to go through the chart.
• 8:57
  Why? Because you're going to be like, let's play with this, honey.
• 9:01
  It takes the conversation of sex to a whole different level.
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  Even if you're just dating someone.
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  Wow. Now, be careful. And I say this earnestly.
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  If you're going to introduce sex toys with some guy that you're dating, he may get hooked on you.
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  So if you're not interested in a long term relationship with this guy,
• 9:24
  be careful because a lot of women are kind of prudish.
• 9:28
  Yes, true. And they don't want
• 9:30
  to talk about sex. So you're part of your family. They're kind of normal.
• 9:34
  I mean, we're kind of the abnormal and I'm okay with that. But a lot of women
• 9:38
  don't want to talk about sex. They don't want to play with sex toys.
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  And they may not want to explore. Well, if you start introducing sex toys into
• 9:48
  your relationship, and let's say you're not married,
• 9:51
  you may hook this guy really hard because he, no pun intended,
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  actually pun intended, that he
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  is going to get really excited with your abilities to explore new things.
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  See, from my culture, we don't talk about this. Yes. If you talk about it,
• 10:05
  they look at you as a bad person.
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  No, this is self-awareness. This is sexual self-awareness, and it's empowering for women.
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  And once you get there, you may also get hooked because now that you've got
• 10:18
  sex toys and you're exploring your sexuality and you're comfortable with your
• 10:23
  partner enough to use sex toys.
• 10:26
  Remember, you've got to be comfortable with yourself first before you get comfortable
• 10:30
  using them with a partner. And you have to have a partner that's willing to use them.
• 10:34
  That's a good point. They're hooked on it. Well, there are men out there that
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  have too big of an ego to use a sex toy.
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  And then there are men out there that will tell you, and I quote unquote what
• 10:45
  one guy told me, I want to make sure you're pleasured in every possible way.
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  He's a keeper. Oh, my goodness. Every guy a day does a keeper to you. Anyway.
• 10:56
  I'm telling you, I'm determined. We're going to plan a wedding.
• 11:01
  We got to have it. So, the reality is, is if he starts pleasing me in every
• 11:06
  possible way, that does bring him up on my chart. Yeah.
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  That shows, like, how confident he has. It's confidence, and it's also a giver.
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  Right. It shows that he's worried about you. He's willing to please you in any kind of way.
• 11:20
  Exactly. And givers, ladies, are so much better than takers.
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  I married a taker. I would really like to be with a giver.
• 11:29
  For a change. For a change. Yes. That's right. Go for it. Yes.
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  The other thing is, is your pleasure is going to go through the roof.
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  So you're going to orgasm more than once. Look at you all glowing already.
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  I'm so excited just thinking about the extender now.
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  And I'm going to use myself as, you know, experimentation. Yeah,
• 11:51
  but you take care of yourself every day, no?
• 11:53
  Yeah, but not with extenders. You're going to have a penis behind the extender. I know. I know.
• 11:58
  Maybe, you know, it's different. After you're done, you want that cuddling,
• 12:03
  right? You want that feel of warmness. You do. After you're done.
• 12:06
  Yeah, you want the partner. And here's the thing. After you have sex with somebody,
• 12:09
  you don't have to necessarily have sex right away.
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  So you can wait. You can wait a little bit. It's not like you're like,
• 12:15
  whereas if you're masturbating, you're going to be having sex with yourself
• 12:18
  every day and it's still not enough, I will say.
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  But it's going to enhance your pleasure with your partner. That's awesome.
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  They're going to enjoy it more too. I'm excited.
• 12:27
  They might get multiple orgasms. Oh, wow. You are going to have multiple orgasms, most likely.
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  Like I said, be careful. They might get hooked on you. They might get hooked
• 12:37
  on you, and you might get hooked on them. Yes. You have to be careful, right?
• 12:41
  Yes. For sure that you'll be comfortable to be with that person.
• 12:44
  Wasn't that Fifty Shades of Grey?
• 12:46
  He got hooked on her, and she got hooked on them, and they were using sex toys? Oh, yeah.
• 12:50
  Yeah. And they ended up getting married. But, I mean, if you're going to use
• 12:54
  sex toys, don't do it with...
• 12:57
  You're not going to... First of all, you're probably not going to do it on one
• 12:59
  night stand, I don't do one night stands, but you're probably also not going
• 13:02
  to do it on somebody that you're newly in a relationship, although you might. You never know. Yeah.
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  And if you are shy, I highly recommend them. Really? I was so embarrassed the
• 13:13
  first time I used sex toys.
• 13:15
  I was so embarrassed and it was, you know, it was a little nerve wracking.
• 13:19
  That's why I had to do it because I needed to step out of my comfort zone.
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  They should do it. You should. And then you can do the practice of masturbating
• 13:26
  in front of your spouse. Have you ever done that? No. That's empowering, too.
• 13:30
  Wow. I've learned something new today.
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  I'm all about building confidence in women, and this builds sexual confidence.
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  It builds your needs. It builds desires.
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  It builds your intimacy. It builds your sexuality.
• 13:44
  You will be so empowered after you do that, and he will be so turned on.
• 13:50
  Wow, where have you been all my life? I'm 60 years old. I was not born when
• 13:55
  you were around in the beginning.
• 13:57
  Maybe it's a good thing. It's probably a good thing.
• 14:01
  Oh, my God. Yeah, well, I didn't know all this when I was younger.
• 14:04
  When I was younger, I mean, I think it's a life lesson we learn over life, right? I think so, too.
• 14:09
  As we grow, we learn, and we're here to help people learn and to be empowered.
• 14:13
  Here's the thing, ladies. Sex shouldn't be so embarrassing.
• 14:17
  Right, see? We were in the culture to teach us sex is very bad,
• 14:23
  and it's very conservative. It's yucky.
• 14:26
  It's a bad person. I think over time, it's actually gotten worse.
• 14:31
  You think so? Well, and here's the thing. You have such extreme sexual things.
• 14:36
  I think it drives some people the opposite direction.
• 14:39
  You know how they say if the pendulum swings too far one way,
• 14:42
  it swings just as far back the other way?
• 14:44
  I think what happens is there's too much sex in people's faces all the time on TV.
• 14:50
  There's so much sex with same-sex partners. There's so much sex with transgender.
• 14:56
  There's sex, sex, sex, sex, sex. to the point that people that just want to
• 15:00
  have normal sex, they get driven into the closet and they don't want to talk
• 15:04
  about it. I think that's where I am. Are you?
• 15:07
  No, you're not. You're talking to sex with me on this podcast right now.
• 15:10
  That's what I'm saying. Where have you been all my life? This is for the first
• 15:12
  time I talked about it. I am empowering you.
• 15:15
  I'm telling you. I am here to empower you. This is the first time I've talked about it.
• 15:20
  And this is the first time this weekend that we talked about openly. Thank you, cousin.
• 15:25
  Yeah. You know? Well, so this podcast is helping you come out of your closet, if you will. Yes.
• 15:32
  And helping you come out of, like, your fear of talking about intimacy with other people.
• 15:39
  Right. And I'm also hoping that helping other people who are in the same situation.
• 15:45
  Yes. So the Asian culture is definitely more traditional.
• 15:50
  I'm not going to say conservative, but it's traditional values.
• 15:53
  Traditional, yes. But you have to realize that,
• 15:57
  That's changing, too. Right, but they don't talk about it, but they do it,
• 16:00
  though. Sexual health's important.
• 16:03
  Oh, that's 100%. And you're married.
• 16:07
  Right. You should feel comfortable talking about sex. I should.
• 16:12
  I'm not married. I should feel comfortable talking about sex.
• 16:16
  We should all feel comfortable talking about sex. We all should be able to. I know.
• 16:20
  Yeah. It should not seem. You know what I mean? What types of sex toys,
• 16:24
  when you're with a man, do we want to talk about?
• 16:26
  The extender. She loves her extender. I just found out this weekend there's an extender.
• 16:32
  Yes. Well, let's start at the very beginning. Okay. There are vibrators.
• 16:38
  Vibrator, extender at the same time? Just a vibrator. Okay. Okay.
• 16:43
  Now, the vibrator is going to do clitoral stimulation. Okay.
• 16:48
  They have bullet vibrators and they have a couple vibrators.
• 16:50
  So it could be just for you. It could be for both of you.
• 16:52
  Or, you know, it could be something that you stick inside. you and that you
• 16:56
  can control with an app. There's all kinds of vibrators.
• 16:59
  Wow. There's something called a womanizer and that it's kind of like the new
• 17:04
  rose has kind of it built in.
• 17:06
  It's full-on clitoral stimulation and it's got a handle like a like almost like
• 17:13
  something you'd use on your face but it's for down there.
• 17:16
  Oh wow. And it's only designed to stimulate the clitoris.
• 17:20
  Now Now, I will say, this can be used in sex or it can be used by yourself, either way.
• 17:26
  I tend to only stimulate the clitoris when I'm masturbating.
• 17:30
  Huh. That's something new. Oh, you know, some of them can't be the remote control. They do.
• 17:36
  Mm-hmm. Now, that's something you can use. Let's say you have a man that wants
• 17:41
  to get you turned on for the day.
• 17:43
  Mm-hmm. And he's like, he's going to turn this on when he wants to,
• 17:49
  just to get you excited. And he's not going to let you have an orgasm.
• 17:52
  So he's going to do like, it's going to be delayed gratification.
• 17:56
  So by the time he comes home, you're ready to go. Wow.
• 18:00
  And so that's something like it's a pre-foreplay. Mm-hmm. Yes.
• 18:05
  Yeah. So they have things that are vibrators. And they also have things that
• 18:10
  are vibrators attached to dildos. Wow.
• 18:15
  And they have this one that's called the rose, which I actually have.
• 18:18
  It's a vibrator. Uh-huh. Or it's like a suction vibrator.
• 18:22
  You see, it's got a little suction
• 18:24
  at the tip. And then this is a plunging dildo. And it's not very big.
• 18:28
  It's not very large around. I'd say it's an inch and a half to two inches around. It's not very large.
• 18:34
  If I were to get it, that would be my first sextile I'm going to get.
• 18:36
  I would say it's a fun one.
• 18:37
  Yeah. I will say that the rose section of it, though, is not as strong as a
• 18:41
  regular rose because it runs off the power for both of them.
• 18:45
  But it's fun. If you want to go internal with your masturbation, you can.
• 18:50
  This is just wow to me. Yeah. And then there's what's called a bullet vibrator.
• 18:56
  Oh, my God. And the bullet vibrators, they're kind of like what they sound.
• 19:01
  They're shorter. They're smaller.
• 19:03
  You can leave them in all day if you wanted to.
• 19:06
  They work on the clit. You can use them on the clit. You can use them internally.
• 19:09
  You can use them externally. And they're just, they look like a bullet.
• 19:13
  Some of them come in as an underwear form, isn't it?
• 19:17
  I saw that. Well, I saw that movie, The Ugly Truth. So what it is,
• 19:21
  is it's G-string with underwear.
• 19:24
  Wow. Wow, look at that. It's a lipstick one, too. Yeah.
• 19:27
  I mean, they got it all, don't they? Oh, my God. You got to love the technology.
• 19:34
  And they're not huge. They're only about three or four inches long.
• 19:37
  Now, remember, I don't like sticking things in that are hard to retrieve to get back out.
• 19:42
  Right. So you can do these, but just be careful with the bullet one.
• 19:46
  If it doesn't have a string attached because you
• 19:50
  could get it lost in there and there have been people that get them lost in
• 19:53
  bad spots too but then what do you do to get
• 19:55
  out you have to go to er yeah you have to go to the er if you
• 19:58
  can't get it out so like the most embarrassing there's been
• 20:01
  people stick them in the back side they they get them lost in
• 20:04
  there as well oh my god yeah so and
• 20:07
  then there's couples vibrators right so there's the
• 20:10
  vibrator that stimulates your g-spot that also
• 20:13
  stimulates your clit that also stimulates their ball sack oh my god look at
• 20:18
  all these selection i'm telling you we're gonna have to post some of these on
• 20:21
  our amazon i've tried some of these some of them are good some of them are not
• 20:24
  so great and then then you have some that like wrap around the penis at the
• 20:29
  same time it's working on your clit,
• 20:31
  Oh, my goodness. So they're getting stimulation at the same time.
• 20:34
  Now, ladies, remember, if you have a man that wants to play with toys and he's
• 20:38
  not on Viagra or testosterone and he's older, they may want to do Viagra when they're doing the toys.
• 20:44
  Just saying. Now, make sure they get approval by their doctor,
• 20:47
  obviously. You might give them a heart attack. You don't want to give them a heart attack?
• 20:51
  Because this might be more excitement than they've had in decades.
• 20:54
  Look at all this selection. How do you know what to choose? I'm telling you.
• 20:58
  Well, you decide how you get stimulated most. So this is the reason why our
• 21:02
  podcast on masturbation is so important, because we discussed what turns you
• 21:07
  on. What turns you on, yes.
• 21:09
  You have to know what turns you on before you get all these toys.
• 21:12
  Yeah, so if you like clitoral stimulation, and some women like clitoral stimulation
• 21:17
  and then internal stimulation. Some women just want internal stimulation.
• 21:21
  Some women want anal stimulation. Oh, wow.
• 21:24
  Some women want a stimulation between the vagina hole and the anal hole.
• 21:30
  So some women want different types of stimulation.
• 21:33
  Some women want multiple stimulation. Some women want their clitoris stimulated
• 21:36
  at the same time they're getting their G-spot stimulated.
• 21:38
  Yeah, that's true. This is why men have such a difficult time.
• 21:42
  Well, men. You know, men, we know how to get them off. Well,
• 21:46
  no, that's not true. Because some men like their head stimulated.
• 21:49
  Some people like their shaft more. Some people like their balls played with.
• 21:52
  So men are kind of similar.
• 21:54
  I will say women are a little bit more complicated. complicated but
• 21:57
  men are also have their own little fetishes and needs
• 22:00
  and desires although pretty much eventually all
• 22:03
  men get off well women are always going to
• 22:06
  be more complicated don't you think we are yeah because
• 22:09
  not only are they that then they're like oh let's also stimulate nipples oh
• 22:12
  by the way let's right you know i mean we have so many make sure that candle's
• 22:16
  burning make sure you got the hot oil oh my god but this is going to add to
• 22:22
  it so poor guys we're giving we're giving you kudos,
• 22:27
  man, for putting up with our crazy. Oh my goodness.
• 22:30
  I have, I feel for him deeper, man. Do you? I do. You feel for your husband?
• 22:34
  No, I feel for your man, who I was gonna come.
• 22:38
  I don't need much. Pun intended. I don't need much, I don't think. Do I?
• 22:42
  I have to explore all these toys first, though. Well, I will say that I don't need much.
• 22:48
  I mean, it's not like it takes me a long time to have an orgasm.
• 22:51
  If I'm stimulated correctly, though.
• 22:53
  Right. If I'm not, And see, the thing is, is when you get married with a man, they know you.
• 22:59
  Right. And they know how to get you off. The problem with that is...
• 23:03
  That's what they do every time. And if they're doing it every single time,
• 23:08
  you're going to get bored.
• 23:10
  Okay. And you're going to need some variety. And that's what these sex toys are.
• 23:14
  That's awesome. These sex toys are going to spice up your life.
• 23:18
  And I recommend this highly for married couples.
• 23:21
  Wow. Because he may have been stimulating you in the same way for the last decade
• 23:27
  or however long you've been married.
• 23:29
  Uh-huh. And you're bored. And what happens is when you start introducing these
• 23:33
  sex toys, you find out you've got all kinds of other spots that get off. That's awesome.
• 23:38
  Your orgasms are going to be bigger. What do you recommend for beginners?
• 23:42
  Well, I would highly recommend at least something to stimulate your clit.
• 23:47
  The rose? The rose is good. And
• 23:49
  if you can get the rose with the penis extender, that one's even better.
• 23:52
  We're definitely going to add that one. Oh, we're definitely getting it.
• 23:55
  I'm getting that one first. That's the one I'm going to test out first.
• 23:57
  Okay, then you let me know. I'll let you know.
• 23:59
  Okay. So if you're a person that loves internal stimulation,
• 24:04
  if you haven't been clitorally stimulated well, you have to do something with external stimulation.
• 24:10
  And I would either do the extender. If he says, oh, I'm too big,
• 24:13
  I don't want the extender on me.
• 24:15
  Or if it's uncomfortable, you can get the cock ring with the rose.
• 24:19
  That's awesome. So the cock ring with the rose, it's stretchy.
• 24:23
  It's silicone. So if he has a bigger penis, it'll expand. And if he has a smaller
• 24:29
  penis, some of them are adjustable because if it's too small,
• 24:32
  it could fall off. Just saying.
• 24:34
  But the cock ring with the clitoral stimulus, no guy's ego should be offended by that.
• 24:40
  If he is, then he just doesn't really care about how you feel.
• 24:43
  Right. Honestly, if a guy gets
• 24:44
  upset because you have a cock ring with a clitoral stimulus on it, then...
• 24:48
  You know, it's not really scary. Actually, one of the couples that walk around
• 24:53
  the toy store together, that's amazing, don't they?
• 24:58
  You can do that. They also have home parties.
• 25:01
  There are sex shops that will have
• 25:02
  home parties. Or you can go and watch a demo at one of the sex stores.
• 25:07
  Yes. Yes. I should just watch the shows about that.
• 25:11
  On the first day, they went into the toy store together. Yeah.
• 25:14
  That would be a fun, adventurous first day. I don't know if I would go on a
• 25:18
  first date to a sex store, but it would be a little crazy.
• 25:21
  And crazy is fun sometimes. One thing that has happened to some people,
• 25:25
  and I don't mean to get too grotesque, is they've had some mutilation down there.
• 25:28
  They got abused or something.
• 25:30
  And their clitoris doesn't work
• 25:32
  anymore. And there's religions that have self-mutilated people as well.
• 25:35
  So let's say your clitoris is not functioning the way you like.
• 25:38
  And you don't get orgasms from clitoral stimulation. Then what I would get is
• 25:43
  some type of bullet or wand-type vibrator where you could stimulate your G-spot. Wow.
• 25:52
  And you can also use dildos. There's specific dildos that are for G-spot stimulation.
• 25:57
  Some of them are curved, and they precisely hit right where your G-spot should be.
• 26:02
  Wow. These learned something new today. Yes.
• 26:06
  And there are glass ones, and there are metal ones. Metal? You know why?
• 26:11
  Why? Because you can stick it in the freezer.
• 26:14
  And that cold. And that cold sometimes stimulates people more.
• 26:18
  Wow. Yeah. It's amazing, Diva Mia. I'm telling you, they got it all.
• 26:23
  We live in a wonderful day and age. I'm telling you.
• 26:27
  You know, there's no such a thing that you cannot fight anymore.
• 26:30
  Yes. And pretty soon we're going to be able to buy a whole body dildo.
• 26:34
  The body dildo. It's going to be an AI robot that looks just like a man and
• 26:39
  pleasures you in every possible way, the exact way you like it.
• 26:42
  And you really don't need no man, no? Well, you never know.
• 26:45
  Well, I just, I still like that real person, though. I like to snuggle once
• 26:49
  in a while. Snuggle and the cuddling. I don't like to talk after, but I do like to snuggle.
• 26:54
  There's full massages that do the clit, that do the anal, that do the vagina, that do it all.
• 27:01
  At the same time, it's cock ring that's also vibrating and stimulating your partner.
• 27:06
  Wow. And you use them together.
• 27:09
  That's awesome. Yep. And then there's also Benoit Balls.
• 27:13
  I think they had that in Fifty Shades of Grey. Did you see the Benoit Balls? No.
• 27:18
  Yeah. So the Benoit Balls, they actually, it's more of a foreplay type of thing.
• 27:25
  It was in Fifty Shades of Grey number three. I think I saw all the Fifty Shades of Grey.
• 27:28
  I need to rewatch those again. Yeah, they're called Zen Cube Benoit Balls.
• 27:33
  And basically, you stick them in.
• 27:36
  And when you sit down or move around, you actually contract on them.
• 27:39
  But it strengthens the pelvic floor, but at the same time, it can really excite a person.
• 27:44
  It gives you exercising. It exercises you, too. Wow.
• 27:48
  Yeah, so the Benoit balls are fun. So, I mean, that's something you can have
• 27:52
  just as a side sexual thing.
• 27:55
  I need to find a weekend that keeps free to watch Fifty Shades of Grey. I'm telling you.
• 28:00
  Then we're talking, let's go anal.
• 28:03
  Oh. Well, yeah, I know you're not an anal, but some people are.
• 28:07
  So if you're going to have your bum licked.
• 28:12
  Okay. There are things called butt plugs. let me see what it looks like butt
• 28:18
  plugs actually go into the butt oh my god and they stop you from the crystal
• 28:26
  one they have crystal oh my goodness.
• 28:30
  There's some that are trainers there's some that are anal toys there's some
• 28:34
  that have penises shaped blood plugs look at it they come all sizes there's
• 28:39
  some that vibrate are some thicker than thin. I can't even imagine.
• 28:43
  I want to leave my butt kind of alone. But there are butt plugs and there's
• 28:50
  butt plugs you can put in and then pump up.
• 28:53
  Because there are women that are getting into anal sex more. But is it safe though?
• 28:57
  Yeah, there's butt plugs that look like a tail. So you stick the butt plug and
• 29:02
  then there's a big tail sticking out of your butt.
• 29:05
  Oh my goodness. They have them in all different kinds. It's foxtails and bunny tails.
• 29:12
  Oh, my gosh. Anyway, these are butt plugs. So a lot of them vibrates.
• 29:16
  It gives you another level of orgasm. They don't go very far in, though.
• 29:20
  Now, do not, do not, and I repeat this. So let's say you wanted to stick a butt
• 29:25
  plug in, which is fine. Okay.
• 29:28
  And then someone turned it on, vibrated your butt. Okay, that's one thing.
• 29:32
  They can't even kiss your butt, whatever. Mm-hmm.
• 29:35
  But do not have sex with a butt plug in.
• 29:38
  Okay. Because it will go so far in, you'll never catch that thing out.
• 29:43
  ER trip. Yeah, yeah.
• 29:45
  It's good for exploration. Now, they could be used on the guy or the woman.
• 29:49
  They don't just have to be used on the woman.
• 29:51
  Oh, my God. I'm just looking at that crystal, and the centipede is totally different view.
• 29:57
  It does. It makes it, it's different. And it's not like you're sticking it very far in.
• 30:02
  Yeah, it just plugs your butt, okay? And then some of them vibrate to give you,
• 30:05
  because right inside your anus is another orgasm spot.
• 30:10
  Okay, so let's discuss the A spot. So the A spot is actually inside your vagina.
• 30:15
  Okay it's deep inside your vagina so
• 30:18
  if you have a longer dick man that's what
• 30:22
  they're hitting it's on the front wall the vagina between the cervix and the bladder
• 30:24
  okay it's also it touches
• 30:28
  the anus wall wow yep uh you
• 30:31
  can the way your body's shaped you can you
• 30:34
  can have an orgasm from it from the anus so i
• 30:38
  wonder if that's why it's called the a spot anyway the g
• 30:41
  spot is located just like four inches inside but you
• 30:44
  got to have the right angle to hit the g-spot that's why those penis extenders
• 30:48
  are so good yeah you need to learn your
• 30:50
  vagina i guess or the a spot g spot like
• 30:54
  anatomy of your own you do and if you're
• 30:56
  having an orgasm an anal
• 30:59
  orgasm is very similar to a clitoral orgasm so
• 31:04
  it's it's going to give you a similar type of pleasure that's
• 31:07
  awesome it's a wave through your body you know i when i have an orgasm i feel
• 31:11
  a wave and i can't move like i'm like don't touch me yeah and make sure that
• 31:15
  if you're gonna do anything with your butt ladies it's very clean you're using
• 31:20
  lubricate you're not eating that day i don't recommend people eat if they're
• 31:23
  gonna have anal sex i really don't oh that just goes and you still need to use condoms.
• 31:28
  You still need condoms? Yeah, well, if you're not married to the person,
• 31:31
  you don't know if they have any sexual transmitted diseases,
• 31:34
  you can catch them from anal sex.
• 31:36
  I would get tested first if you're going to do all of that. Yes, yes.
• 31:40
  And just wash everything before you play. I think you should keep it clean down there anyway. Yeah.
• 31:45
  And if anal sex hurts or you start to bleed, you need to stop.
• 31:48
  Mm-hmm. So when you're using these anal toys, you have to remember that anal
• 31:53
  sex is not for the light of heart.
• 31:56
  And I probably will never do anal sex.
• 31:59
  I'm just not into it. I mean, I'm okay with a little bit of kissing and touching
• 32:04
  around. I don't want fingers in my butt either.
• 32:07
  No, that's just gross, no? Yeah, it's not my thing. Yeah, no.
• 32:11
  And then there's bondage and sensory play toys. What is that?
• 32:15
  You know what bondage is. No!
• 32:17
  Handcuffs, silk ties, blindfolds, feathers. A little feather.
• 32:23
  Yeah. Yeah. A little whip to spank with.
• 32:26
  And some people enjoy that. I like the feather.
• 32:30
  I'm giving all my sexy quits away. You're going to be like, I'm going to call you diva.
• 32:37
  You know how they have 50 shades of gray? You have like 50 shades of diva me.
• 32:42
  That's going to be another book. Oh, no. I'm not writing a sex book.
• 32:46
  Anyway, never say never, but, you know.
• 32:50
  Yeah. So let's talk about introducing sex toys with a man.
• 32:55
  Okay. So you're going to talk about it outside the bedroom first.
• 33:00
  Okay. Do not show up on a date with a sex toy and say, let's use it.
• 33:04
  Some sex toys have to be powered and charged first.
• 33:08
  Don't you have to have discussion with your partner first? Outside the bedroom,
• 33:12
  yes. Outside the bedroom.
• 33:13
  Have a discussion outside the bedroom. Okay.
• 33:16
  For instance, there's a person that I've been talking to that wants to use sex
• 33:20
  toys with me. And we talked about it well before we've even slept together.
• 33:26
  So we're discussing it before. Now, this guy and I have a very sexual, strong chemistry.
• 33:32
  I don't know if we have other chemistry, but we do have a very sexual chemistry.
• 33:35
  And you can have sexual chemistry from all kinds of people, right?
• 33:40
  It's just if you connect sexually, you kind of just know it. You get a vibe going.
• 33:45
  Right. And then you could have other chemistry, but no sexual chemistry.
• 33:50
  Some people just could talk all day long. Yeah, and that's fine.
• 33:53
  Yeah. And the thing is, though, I'm trying to find someone with both.
• 33:58
  Emotional mental chemistry as well as sexual chemistry don't
• 34:01
  you think everybody has it though no well everybody
• 34:05
  has it but doesn't mean you have chemistry to towards them
• 34:08
  yeah you know what i mean and there's people out there too that
• 34:10
  you may not be physically attracted to but you have such a strong sexual chemistry
• 34:15
  because they're so they're so assure of themselves and confident that there's
• 34:20
  the sexual chemistry with them is amazing yeah it's not an appearance thing
• 34:24
  believe it or not There are people that are in really good shape,
• 34:28
  and then they go be with somebody that's really out of shape,
• 34:32
  whether it's male or female,
• 34:34
  because the sexual chemistry is so strong. Yeah.
• 34:37
  You're going to talk about it outside the bedroom first. Okay.
• 34:40
  Then you're going to frame it as you want to explore things together. Okay.
• 34:45
  Do not come across it as saying, hey, I'm just not satisfied in the bedroom.
• 34:49
  That is one way to break up a relationship or to damage someone's ego.
• 34:52
  Or when you do go use the text toys, then they're going to be overcritical of
• 34:56
  everything that happens. Right.
• 34:58
  So frame it as let's explore some new things and have some fun or let's play together.
• 35:03
  I really think that when you grow old, you need to find someone that makes you younger.
• 35:08
  And the way you're younger is you play together, whether it's sexually or emotionally.
• 35:12
  So play together. Play together. It's a thing, right? So you have to frame it
• 35:17
  as wanting to explore things together. Yes.
• 35:21
  Let's never be critical of our partners in the bedroom because
• 35:24
  sex just like people are shy around sex and
• 35:27
  you know it is part of their ego yeah so
• 35:30
  the way you bring it up it has to be very careful you have
• 35:32
  to be careful you have to be you have to be considerate now again if you have
• 35:37
  a partner that's just all into sex toys it's not as it's not as sensitive of
• 35:42
  a subject right so it's up to you to bring it up if this is what you want to
• 35:47
  do it's you're not going to have somebody else. I mean, you could draw a pence.
• 35:51
  Yeah, you just say, let's have some fun. But yeah, and I guess you could show
• 35:56
  up with a sex toy if you've got that type of relationship, but I think you should
• 36:00
  have a discussion first.
• 36:01
  Yeah, I think as this day and age, everything needs to be discussed up front.
• 36:05
  Yes, and I do think you should start off, maybe not with the extender.
• 36:10
  Okay. I think you should start off with something that is sensory,
• 36:14
  like maybe a vibrator of some type or a cop ring with a vibrator on it.
• 36:18
  Something that pleasures you both.
• 36:20
  Awesome. So that you're both getting some enjoyment out of it.
• 36:24
  Make sure your partner knows that they're not going to get replaced by a toy.
• 36:30
  And make sure you don't replace them by a toy. That's the key.
• 36:34
  A toy will never actually replace sex. No. You need to make sure that your partner's
• 36:39
  ego is not damaged or if They're not in fear of actually being replaced because
• 36:45
  there's a lot of insecurity around performance in sex.
• 36:48
  That's so true. But this will definitely build your intimacy and trust with each other.
• 36:52
  Yeah, I think so, too. I would think you will grow stronger, no? You do.
• 36:57
  And you can also play games with this.
• 37:01
  You can also role play. Yeah, why not? You can role play.
• 37:05
  You can do some bondage. You can come in in a cop's uniform, tie him up, use a sex toy.
• 37:11
  There's lots of things you can do with sex toys. Awesome. It's fun to play with your partner. Yes.
• 37:17
  Give it like your sex like boost it up a little. Yeah. And you need a safe word.
• 37:23
  A safe word. Oh, I remember that word. Safe word. That's from 50 Shades of Plane.
• 37:26
  Yeah. safe words. I like colors.
• 37:29
  Safe words. I do like that. The idea of a color because red would probably be
• 37:33
  my safe word. I would be pink.
• 37:35
  Yeah, you can be pink. Pink could be your safe word. Something small.
• 37:38
  Don't say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
• 37:41
  That's not a good safe word. Something that you can remember that's a short
• 37:45
  word that you can remember when you get really nervous. Nervous. Yeah.
• 37:49
  And it can be with a sex toy. It can be with a little bit of bondage, whatever
• 37:52
  uh-huh this is gonna be fun for you diva
• 37:55
  cat oh i learned something new today yes
• 37:58
  and the other big thing with sex toys only use
• 38:02
  toys designed for sex oh my god some people stick all kinds of things up their
• 38:07
  butt or up their vagina and then they get them stuck or it causes an infection
• 38:11
  or you get all kinds of weird stuff going on only use sex toys designed for
• 38:16
  sex i mean you could use i'm not even gonna i'm not even gonna give you ideas but people use.
• 38:23
  Screwdrivers oh my and they cut themselves i mean
• 38:25
  you don't do that stuff okay sex toys need to
• 38:28
  be purchased i don't care how poor you are if you're going to use a sex toy get
• 38:31
  a sex toy don't stick a screwdriver up there yeah so
• 38:35
  and make sure the toys are waterproof yeah you
• 38:38
  gotta be clean no yeah disinfect it's for easy cleaning yeah
• 38:41
  yeah and some sex toys can be used in the
• 38:44
  bathtub wow and let's
• 38:48
  take a bath and i do like the rechargeable ones otherwise i'd be going through
• 38:52
  tons of batteries make sure they're recharged before you and your partner get
• 38:58
  intimate oh and only shop sex toys that have good recommendations or a good brand that you know,
• 39:06
  that's why i like shopping online for sex toys plus i don't have to go to a
• 39:09
  store and ask a person i'm still a little shy about that right but you could
• 39:14
  read all the reviews you could read all the reviews online then go to a store
• 39:17
  if you want to but i will say the stores have more variety but you can get some on amazon,
• 39:23
  Oh, really? Yeah, I got the rose on Amazon. That's what I'm saying.
• 39:26
  Amazon has everything. Amazon doesn't have everything.
• 39:29
  No? No, the sex shops have a lot more than Amazon.
• 39:33
  Let's go shopping. Yes, and you also need to clean the dang toys.
• 39:38
  Soap and water, you need to clean them with every single time.
• 39:41
  You may even want to disinfect them with alcohol.
• 39:44
  And if you have a sexually transmitted disease, you need to double clean them.
• 39:48
  And you should only be, if you and your partner know about your sexually transmitted disease.
• 39:53
  And then you should only be using them with one partner. Oh, yeah, please.
• 39:56
  So if you get a cock ring with a rose, it should stay and only be used with that partner.
• 40:03
  You should not be using a cock ring and a rose with every different partner. That's kind of gross.
• 40:08
  Oh. Yeah. So each sex toy that you're going to use with your partner,
• 40:12
  keep it with that partner.
• 40:14
  You should name them. You have multiple partners.
• 40:17
  How do you know which one for which? Well, I will leave my sex toy with my partner.
• 40:21
  Oh, I see. I mean, if he does what he wants, but it better only be used with me. Yeah.
• 40:27
  But you can encourage exploration, right? There's no shame. Mm-hmm.
• 40:31
  And it's just pleasure, right? It's an adventure.
• 40:36
  We'll find out. I can't wait to hear your stories. I don't know.
• 40:41
  You don't know if you're going to do it? I'm not sure how I'm ever going to
• 40:45
  bring it up. We'll find out. How are you going to bring it up?
• 40:48
  I'm going to bring out, hey, our podcast today, we're talking about toys.
• 40:51
  What do you think i'm gonna blame on
• 40:54
  the podcast yeah blame it on the
• 40:57
  blame it on me yeah tell your husband
• 41:00
  thank dang mia diva mia has always
• 41:03
  got me talking about new stuff so every day we go around okay you know what
• 41:06
  we talk about today sex toy extender yeah i would okay i would stop calling
• 41:14
  it an extender okay what do you be calling we'll just call it a g-spot vibrator
• 41:18
  oh okay Because when you call it an extender,
• 41:21
  it's going to, even though it says extender on the box, don't show them the box.
• 41:25
  It's going to demasculate some men.
• 41:28
  Ah, they're going to think they're so. So let them know it's just a G-spot vibrator.
• 41:32
  I see. Okay, so get the one that's extender, but also the same as a vibrator.
• 41:37
  So then when you talk about it, you say, oh, I want this for my G-spot vibrator.
• 41:43
  I see, I see.
• 41:44
  Wow. That's going to be awesome. I may have to create a different account just
• 41:49
  for these sex toys, the Amazon account.
• 41:53
  You don't, I don't know if you need a new account. You just need to make sure
• 41:56
  you get the package before your son does.
• 41:58
  That's what I'm saying. Oh my God. Yes. All right. So since you're so into the
• 42:02
  extender, let's talk extender for a minute.
• 42:04
  So like I said, some of them wrap around. They're actually called a penis sleeve.
• 42:08
  So the penis sleeve can actually wrap around their balls, stick out through the bottom.
• 42:13
  So if somebody has a little tiny penis, let's say it's short.
• 42:17
  Let's say it's kind of a penis ring for a short dick. So there's a penis ring
• 42:22
  that will add three inches to their dick size.
• 42:26
  Wow. And it vibrates. The tip has it vibrating.
• 42:30
  Yeah. And then their balls stick out through the bottom. So it gives you an
• 42:32
  overall up to eight inches.
• 42:36
  Oh, my God. Holy moly. They do have them extendable up to 10 inches.
• 42:40
  Now. They're so painful.
• 42:42
  I think so, too. However, you have to remember, everyone's been into these big butts lately.
• 42:48
  These big BBL surgeries where their butts are super big.
• 42:51
  So let's say you're doing, you're having sex and someone's butt is really big.
• 42:57
  Right. A guy can't go as far in.
• 43:00
  Why? Because it's just like the belly in between. So the butt in between.
• 43:03
  It's just like, it's decreasing how far a man can go in.
• 43:06
  I see. So if you got big bellies or big butts, 10 inches may not be so bad because
• 43:10
  you're actually only getting six inches inside.
• 43:13
  I see. You understand? Uh-huh. So that's where that kind of comes in.
• 43:17
  Comes in so if somebody's got a big butt or if somebody's got
• 43:19
  a big belly then yes you can get the penis extenders okay and then they have
• 43:25
  different vibration modes why you know and believe me this is not for the faint
• 43:31
  of heart okay it's only going to add about three inches to your dick okay it's
• 43:37
  not for the faint of heart.
• 43:39
  And it's for a man that's okay using one of these.
• 43:43
  And they look like penises, ladies. These ones that wrap around,
• 43:46
  it's called a penis sleeve.
• 43:48
  They look just like a dick. You're basically increasing the size of someone's dick.
• 43:53
  That's awesome. And then they have them where the balls stick out the bottom,
• 43:58
  the dick goes through the front, and then you have a clitoral stimulation on the sleeves as well.
• 44:03
  Awesome. It kind of looks like a rabbit.
• 44:05
  So, yeah, it's interesting. And the cock ring and the rose will actually stimulate
• 44:11
  the, this goes around the balls, and then this goes around the penis. Okay.
• 44:16
  And so it has two rings, basically.
• 44:19
  It really does help them last a little bit longer, too.
• 44:23
  And it gives you a very great G-spot stimulator. That's awesome.
• 44:29
  And the guy's got to be willing to put it on, because the guy,
• 44:31
  it's a strap-on for the guy, basically.
• 44:34
  Just like the sleeve is a strap-on for the guy. So and then you have them where
• 44:39
  they wrap and then they vibrate on two different sides.
• 44:42
  Now, those the men love. OK, it's a cock ring.
• 44:46
  It vibrates on two different sides. And you may want one that vibrates on two
• 44:51
  different sides depending on where your G spot is.
• 44:54
  That's awesome. So you got to try these out, too. Oh, my God.
• 44:57
  You might post on this on your store. Yes.
• 45:00
  And then the other one, let's say you have a man that's a little longer. Uh-huh. Huh?
• 45:04
  They have ones that, they have sleeves that have the tip cut off so their penis
• 45:09
  can actually stick out through the tip. Oh, I see.
• 45:11
  Because let's say it's six or seven inches or eight inches, their penis will
• 45:15
  stick out through the tip and it's just more of a clitoral stimulation then. I see.
• 45:19
  Yeah. So there's all different kinds out here, ladies. You can pick and choose.
• 45:24
  Oh, my God. Yeah. And then they even have some that actually have an extender
• 45:28
  that inside, oh, my gosh. So this is a penis sleeve.
• 45:34
  That when it goes in,
• 45:36
  It has licking motion on the tip of the penis. Oh, my God. I can't even imagine.
• 45:41
  That would tickle you inside, I think. Uh-huh. But they got it all.
• 45:45
  Everybody's got different G-spots. Everybody's got different locations.
• 45:48
  So many selections. Why don't you list this, your favorite one on our shop?
• 45:53
  Well, my favorite one actually looks like a kitty cat. It's a sleeve with a kitty cat face.
• 45:57
  I haven't tried it out. Oh, my God. But the kitty cat face is actually a vibrator.
• 46:01
  Poor cat. I know. It's funny, though, right? It's kind of funny.
• 46:05
  And then there's just penis sleeves that vibrate and those
• 46:08
  are good too that's going to hit your clitoris a little bit so
• 46:11
  the g-spot it'll go in it's got to go around you know
• 46:14
  closer to the tip and this is good too for a man that's a little bit larger
• 46:17
  okay now that look like just like homemade bomb i mean like everything's sticking
• 46:22
  out from all different directions different directions so i'm going to post
• 46:29
  some of these on our store the ones i think that are better and And I'll try them out before.
• 46:32
  Actually, I'll try them out before I post them. There we go.
• 46:35
  Write the review. Yeah. This experience for my own self. I really do like the penis extenders.
• 46:42
  See, these are full-on extenders versus just an extender with a G-spot stimulator.
• 46:46
  I do like the extenders that have a rabbit on them, I will say,
• 46:51
  because you're getting a lot of pleasure from that rabbit. That's awesome.
• 46:54
  That is. But this is fun, too. I mean, so this is a cough ring with an extender
• 46:59
  that's got a G-spot vibrator at the end and a rabbit.
• 47:02
  Wow. So now when we use all these toys, I had a question. Do you still need to use condoms?
• 47:08
  Yes. You do? Okay. Because you can still get sexually transmitted diseases.
• 47:13
  Oh, okay. Because this is only a sleeve. That's what I'm thinking.
• 47:16
  Oh, no. You still need to use condoms. I see.
• 47:19
  Yeah. I would stick the condom around their penis before you actually stick the toy on. I see.
• 47:25
  Oh, okay. Okay. The condom first and then the toys.
• 47:28
  Yeah, because these aren't, because some people have more room in them than others. Uh-huh.
• 47:33
  See, the reason you loop it around their balls is so it doesn't slide off into
• 47:36
  you. I see. Because some of people it'll still be loose on.
• 47:40
  I see. Right? Mm-hmm. This might be a trying to go to a store,
• 47:44
  too, if you're getting it for a guy, because you want to make sure that it fits.
• 47:49
  Now, you're not going to try them on in the store, but you can see the size
• 47:52
  differences. Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. All kinds of sex toys.
• 47:56
  Now, the sex toys can be used in different positions, so you need to make sure
• 48:01
  you get the right sex toy for the right position.
• 48:03
  I see. It's up to you.
• 48:07
  The doggy style that you were so adamantly talking about with your cousin,
• 48:12
  anything with a wand or an extender is good for. I see.
• 48:16
  And it's great for a wand massager. Wow. You really had to do all the study before. You do.
• 48:21
  Yeah. All the position, but for all of us. You could have sex and have a couple's vibrator.
• 48:28
  Now, the couple's vibrator can just be a handheld with a vibrating tip,
• 48:33
  right? You can have your man stimulate you while you're having sex.
• 48:38
  I see. I've had that work.
• 48:39
  Wow, that's awesome. So if you stimulate the clitoris while you're having sex,
• 48:44
  you're more likely to get off.
• 48:47
  Cowgirl is really good with the vibrating cough ring too.
• 48:50
  Wow. So it works with missionary or cowgirl. Cowgirl.
• 48:54
  It doesn't work with reverse missionary unless you turn it around,
• 48:57
  but then it can't be looped around their balls. You might want to mention,
• 49:00
  you dare to listen to all the cognitive mis- and all the position before this podcast.
• 49:05
  You should. So if you have a favorite position or you're, you can still do the
• 49:09
  same position, ladies. Right.
• 49:11
  You just need to know what position works with what vibrator. I see.
• 49:15
  Spooning, you can have, you would have to have a remote vibrator or handheld.
• 49:20
  Okay. So that's because when you're spooning, like a side sex,
• 49:24
  have you had sex laying on your side?
• 49:25
  I like that. Now, remember, ladies, you can't do that with short-dick men.
• 49:29
  It just doesn't work. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 49:30
  If you're on the edge of the bed, you can use a wand.
• 49:34
  That would work. But you have to remember, you have to decide what's your favorite position.
• 49:40
  Yes. And what you enjoy the most. You got homework to do, ladies.
• 49:44
  You could use a butt plug with reverse cowgirl.
• 49:46
  You could use a handheld, but you'd be the one holding it typically with reverse cowgirl.
• 49:50
  Or you can turn around a cock ring with a rose for reverse cowgirl.
• 49:55
  But then it's going to vibrate his balls at the same time it's vibrating your clitoris. Hmm.
• 50:01
  Interesting. And then, you know, there's also just the handhelds,
• 50:04
  like the handhelds, the feather, little teasing toys. Those are fun, too.
• 50:08
  You might want to start with the non-mechanical ones.
• 50:11
  That's true. Now, do not stick a sex toy up there and then have sex, too.
• 50:15
  Some people have stuck bullets up inside them that are short,
• 50:20
  and then they have sex, and then they can't get the bullet out.
• 50:23
  They can't get the bullet out. So, remember, you've got to be able to get that
• 50:26
  back out. You can't just stick it up there.
• 50:28
  Oh, my God. Because, you know, you don't want that thing vibrating while you're in the ER.
• 50:33
  Oh, my God. You just give me a good... You add orgasm after orgasm and you can't get it out.
• 50:38
  Can you imagine the ride to the ER of other things in there?
• 50:41
  And you're... Oh, my God.
• 50:43
  Let's say you're in an ambulance and you're like, oh, every time there's a problem, it's like, oh.
• 50:49
  I've had 15 orgasms today and I can't stop. I'm so dehydrated.
• 50:54
  By the time you get to ER, you're going to need an IV bag.
• 50:58
  That would be the worst thing ever. What happened to you? How are you going
• 51:01
  to tell your friends and family?
• 51:02
  I was in the ER because I got a vibrator stuck up there and he gave me 15 orgasms.
• 51:07
  Oh, my God. Do you think that?
• 51:10
  Can you imagine what in ER? I think this thing is interesting.
• 51:14
  There's actually nurse after nurse.
• 51:16
  I keep seeing these funny podcasts where nurses come out and say,
• 51:20
  if it's not supposed to be up there, don't stick it up there. It happens.
• 51:24
  And they don't talk about sex toys, but they talk about non-sex toys. Right.
• 51:28
  So if you're going to stick something in you, you need to make sure it has.
• 51:32
  And I don't even recommend sticking a sex toy with you and then sticking a dick in.
• 51:36
  Because, yes, it may have something that it's hanging like a string it's tied
• 51:40
  to. But those strings break. Great.
• 51:43
  If you're going to use a sex toy internally, other than the extender.
• 51:47
  Okay. The extender is different because it's actually wrapped around the guy's
• 51:51
  penis. So when he pulls out, the extender comes out too.
• 51:54
  Gender is different but if you're sticking one prior to
• 51:57
  like a bullet with a string or even just a bullet
• 52:00
  in general like a bullet vibrator don't have sex
• 52:03
  after oh my god they're gonna shove it so far up there you're never getting
• 52:07
  that thing out and then you're gonna be like oh crap i'm on my way to the er
• 52:10
  with a vibrator inside me oh my god can you imagine no that will never happen
• 52:16
  to me i would have to like use the pillow cover my face so i don't have to see
• 52:20
  it that would be hilarious though.
• 52:23
  That would be embarrassing. I can't stop laughing from that thought.
• 52:26
  Oh, my God. I could see you doing this, Diva Cat. Oh, my God.
• 52:30
  No, I'll use the pillow cover my hair.
• 52:32
  Yeah, I'll come to visit Diva Cat. I'm like, is it serious? You're like,
• 52:35
  yeah, it's stuck and it won't come out.
• 52:37
  I'm telling you, you'll be the first one on my emergency phone.
• 52:41
  Yes, you call me first because I'll be there for you.
• 52:43
  I will help you get it taken care of. But nurses, they do.
• 52:47
  People are sticking all kinds of things up inside themselves and getting them stuck.
• 52:50
  So how do they do to get it out? Surgically removed? what
• 52:53
  they they have to usually go in with like those things remember
• 52:56
  oh my god remember we have a gynecology yeah those
• 52:59
  little things to they have to separate you if
• 53:02
  you're a woman you know they it's like getting a terrible
• 53:06
  annual like it would be like getting the worst annual
• 53:09
  of your life right they're gonna have to open you up with
• 53:11
  the clamps they're gonna have to go in there and grab it oh my
• 53:14
  god and yeah it would
• 53:18
  be bad it's not gonna be fun and i guess it
• 53:20
  depends on how far up there if it got too lodged and too far
• 53:23
  up there they might have to surgically operate yes you don't
• 53:26
  want that you don't want that no all all funniness
• 53:29
  aside there is an expense to that you don't want to add that to your oh no no
• 53:34
  to your expense now i am not saying that sex toys are going to save a bad marriage
• 53:39
  no if you have a bad marriage it's not because of sex typically no although
• 53:45
  i will say if a woman's in a bad mood a lot she's not getting it enough.
• 53:49
  But if you have a bad marriage, there's usually underlying things.
• 53:52
  But this will definitely spice up the bedroom and get you playful again,
• 53:56
  right? Get you playful with your partner.
• 53:59
  I do love the vibrating cock rings, though. It's not going to save your marriage,
• 54:02
  though. It's not going to save a marriage.
• 54:05
  Now, let's talk about lubricant.
• 54:08
  Okay. So you can use lubricant with sex toys.
• 54:11
  I think it's way better, especially at our age. We do tend to get a little drier
• 54:16
  than we used to. A little dry. We dry.
• 54:19
  Not that dry. You will get a little drier. So get a nice lubricant.
• 54:24
  Now, don't get the chemical-based lubricants. I know there's a lot of them out
• 54:27
  there. I'm going to post on the store the lubricants, too, to use.
• 54:30
  Oh, awesome. Yes, get some that. Now, some people, some lubricants are silicone-based.
• 54:36
  Is it really? Some are water-based. Some are aloe-based. I like the aloe-based ones.
• 54:40
  How about the oil? Maybe oil. It depends on what type of oil you're getting.
• 54:45
  Some oils irritate people. So I always recommend before you use a lubricant,
• 54:50
  don't use it straight out of the gate.
• 54:52
  Test it on your skin. There are lubricants, some of them are that heat up.
• 54:56
  They're self-warming lubricants. So the self-warming lubricants,
• 55:00
  you have to be careful because they have chemicals to heat them up.
• 55:02
  And some people are allergic to those chemicals.
• 55:04
  Yeah, you need to test on your hand or something. You have to test it all.
• 55:08
  I mean, and honestly, one of my favorite lubricants is coconut oil.
• 55:11
  Yeah. Coconut oil is wonderful. And it's wonderful for vaginal dryness too.
• 55:16
  Hmm, I see. Yeah, plus you're extra sensitive out there. I am extremely sensitive. Yeah.
• 55:22
  The nice thing about coconut oil is it helps you just stay, you know.
• 55:27
  It smells nice. It smells nice. If somebody likes coconut oil and they're not
• 55:30
  allergic to coconuts, make sure your partner's not allergic to coconuts first. That would be bad.
• 55:34
  You know, there are the Astroglides and the KY Jelly. And it's fine if you don't
• 55:38
  have sensitivities. But I've always had difficulty with some of those.
• 55:43
  And so you're going to put it on the sex toy. Okay.
• 55:46
  And then you're going to use it just like normal. Now, don't put it on a sex
• 55:49
  toy and go ramming it into someone because that's going to really hurt.
• 55:53
  And they have different lubricants for him and different lubricants for her.
• 55:57
  I see. I do like aloe vera-based ones. I will say the aloe vera-based ones are
• 56:01
  nice as well as the coconut oil-based ones. I see. And some of them you can eat.
• 56:06
  Some of them you can't. I would assume you could eat them.
• 56:10
  Some? Yeah. Not all. Mm-hmm. And then there's some lubricants that are supposed
• 56:14
  to stimulate more of an orgasm.
• 56:17
  So if you're using different types of, it's supposed to intensify arousal.
• 56:22
  There are so many. There are, just like sex toys, there's so many.
• 56:27
  Now, a lot of times I will say when they're stimulating something,
• 56:31
  it's because they have some type of chemical.
• 56:33
  Mm-hmm. All right? So you have to be careful. Be careful what you're sticking
• 56:36
  on your skin and in your skin. I'm just saying. Yeah, read the ingredients.
• 56:40
  And test it on your physical skin. First, you may even want to test it down
• 56:43
  there because the last thing you want is for you to break out in a rash down there.
• 56:47
  And that'll kind of deter the whole sex thing. It'll make it look like you have
• 56:51
  an STD if you break out in some type of rash.
• 56:53
  Or develop a blister because you're allergic to the lubricant.
• 56:56
  Yeah. Oh, that would hurt. That would hurt. And I do.
• 56:58
  My skin is sensitive. Like, you put cocoa butter on my skin,
• 57:01
  it can blister because I'm allergic to chocolate.
• 57:05
  Oh, I see. So if you have cocoa butter in a lubricant, I don't want it.
• 57:10
  Some people are allergic to mango to make sure they're not scented.
• 57:13
  Any mangoes? Mango senses. Yeah.
• 57:16
  I'm allergic to pineapple. Yes. You see these?
• 57:19
  The other thing I like about coconut oil and those types of natural oils is
• 57:23
  a lot of times you can use them on the skin first. You can do a massage.
• 57:26
  And then you can use them to go right into sex as well. Yes,
• 57:29
  I see. So it's up to you. But lubricants are very important.
• 57:34
  Especially at our age. Although, you know, it also depends on how turned on you are.
• 57:38
  Because I had one partner that I didn't need a lubricant with.
• 57:43
  I see. And don't spit on it. Oh, I hate it.
• 57:46
  I don't care what guys are listening to this. Don't spit on your hand.
• 57:50
  Stick it on your dick. Oh, no. And use the spit as lubricant. I'm sorry.
• 57:54
  I don't want the bacteria from your mouth in my vajayjay.
• 57:59
  Now, for a lubricant, go buy a damn lubricant. No. I just think...
• 58:04
  Everybody should have those lubricants on hand. You should. I have a big,
• 58:08
  big old bottle next to my nightstand, but you should have lubricants. You have to. You have to.
• 58:14
  And so lubricants are nice. But the reality is they should be getting you aroused
• 58:18
  before you have sex, before they stick anything inside you. Yeah, of course.
• 58:22
  So you should be at least turned on, but you may have less lubricant as you get older.
• 58:26
  It's a hormonal thing, by the way. When you have low lubrication,
• 58:31
  it's usually due to lack of estrogen.
• 58:33
  For sure. After you go through menopause, your estrogen decreases,
• 58:36
  and therefore you get less lubricant.
• 58:39
  So you can use some estrogen cream, but that's for you to work out with your
• 58:42
  doctor, not with us. So think about that.
• 58:46
  Consult your doctor. Consult your doctor.
• 58:48
  Now, there's also kits you can buy, like play kits, like bondage kits.
• 58:52
  If you just want to try to explore and you don't want to have a bondage room
• 58:55
  like in Fifty Shades of Grey. Mm-hmm. Was it Fifty Shades of Grey?
• 58:59
  I don't have a play room, but you could have a little kit. I actually have a
• 59:02
  sex bag that I travel with, too, sometimes.
• 59:04
  Oh, my God. But you can have a sex bag or you can have, you don't have, but keep it private.
• 59:10
  Can you imagine? You know, you have to put that through security packet. No, you can check it.
• 59:15
  Ah i see you can check it you just
• 59:18
  don't have a whole bunch of vibrators in there but like i have i
• 59:20
  have lubricant in there i have condoms i have feathers i
• 59:24
  have little fun stuff keep it private i mean
• 59:27
  yeah we're talking here very openly on this
• 59:29
  podcast to hopefully educate you and give you some empowerment and
• 59:32
  help you feel better about your sex lives right but i
• 59:35
  don't want you showing it off to your kids so you don't even want your cleaning people
• 59:38
  to find it so just make sure that
• 59:41
  your sex stuff is kept private out.
• 59:44
  Of everyone's eyes it's tricky though i
• 59:48
  will say when go to charge all this stuff i actually
• 59:51
  have a hidden area for my charging
• 59:54
  stations for my sex toys yes yeah inside a
• 59:57
  cabinet and lock it up inside of a cabinet or inside
• 1:00:00
  of a closet exactly and have
• 1:00:03
  it covered that's what i do so definitely have
• 1:00:07
  your little sex toys separate and then you know temperature matters
• 1:00:10
  too some of them you can chill i don't stick
• 1:00:13
  them in the freezer where the kids are going obviously but you can chill them
• 1:00:16
  some of them can be heated huh so it depends
• 1:00:19
  on what you like for stimulation i like kind of
• 1:00:22
  like the heating ones probably just made sure that the vibrator or
• 1:00:25
  the the dildo or whatever you're using is is designed
• 1:00:28
  to be heated or cooled because you can break it
• 1:00:31
  yeah and they remember they do have batteries you don't want to break shelf
• 1:00:37
  life right they have a shelf life yeah and and toys they die i can speak from
• 1:00:42
  experience after a certain number of hours of use they burnt out they get burned
• 1:00:47
  out and they will go bye-bye.
• 1:00:50
  I've killed a few toys in my time oh my god and the nice thing about using sex
• 1:00:56
  toys is that replace them you can replace them yes you can always find new okay
• 1:01:02
  so missionary okay Thanks.
• 1:01:05
  I'm going to talk a little bit about deep intimacy. Do you make eye contact
• 1:01:09
  when you're having sex or do you close your eyes?
• 1:01:12
  Eye contact. I like eye contact, too. I love to watch the other person.
• 1:01:17
  So some people close their eyes. But I think once you start using toys,
• 1:01:23
  you kind of want to see what the other person's doing with them.
• 1:01:25
  Yeah, some people turn off the lights.
• 1:01:28
  Oh, I don't care whether the lights are on or off. Yeah. But I do like to have
• 1:01:32
  at least a little bit of light so I can see their reaction because I really
• 1:01:36
  like to see their reaction, too.
• 1:01:37
  I'm really into, like, what my partner is feeling. Because you're a pleaser.
• 1:01:42
  I am a pleaser. I'm a giver. Yeah, you're a giver. That's why I need a giver, right?
• 1:01:46
  Because I've been giving to takers and I need a giver to give back. To give back, yes.
• 1:01:51
  And you know what? God is on your side. There's a lot of people out there.
• 1:01:56
  You've got to love a man. You've got to love a man that says they want to please
• 1:02:00
  you in every way. Oh, my God.
• 1:02:02
  Yeah, that's such a turn-on. It's a turn-on, right?
• 1:02:07
  So I want to see a little bit. You don't have to have full-on light.
• 1:02:10
  I like a little bit of candlelight or a little bit of ambient light.
• 1:02:14
  But, you know, during the day, I'm fine having sex. At night,
• 1:02:16
  I'm fine having sex. In the morning, noon, or night. It doesn't matter what time of the day.
• 1:02:19
  Hell, even 3 o'clock in the morning when you get nudged in the middle of the
• 1:02:22
  night, I'm okay with that, too.
• 1:02:24
  There is good time for any time. It's a good time any time. Mm-hmm.
• 1:02:29
  I like that. But you may need an extender. You may need a cock ring extender.
• 1:02:34
  Oh, for the cuddling? No, for the spooning. Oh, for the spooning.
• 1:02:39
  You're in a spooning position. Okay.
• 1:02:43
  And it's kind of like doggy style laying down, honestly.
• 1:02:47
  But it's spooning, and it really hits your G-spot well.
• 1:02:51
  So if you're going to do a spooning type of sex, I recommend you get the cock
• 1:02:57
  sleeve if they're a small dick person.
• 1:02:59
  Get the cop sleeve with the the g-string
• 1:03:03
  vibrator that's how awesome already yeah
• 1:03:06
  and here's the thing there's no shame in
• 1:03:09
  having a short dick no there's no such a thing not today there used to be in
• 1:03:15
  the 60s when they didn't have these things because it was probably hard you
• 1:03:19
  know they even in the 80s they had i don't want no short dick man there was
• 1:03:22
  that song yeah remember that anyway So now,
• 1:03:27
  if you're a sweet-hearted, good man that's a giver and takes care of your woman,
• 1:03:34
  this is just another way to take care of your woman. That's awesome. It's true.
• 1:03:39
  And therefore, the length of your penis doesn't matter as much because you can make it longer.
• 1:03:46
  You can enjoy sex more as a man, as well as allowing your girlfriend or your wife to enjoy sex more.
• 1:03:54
  Yeah so what where is the shame in
• 1:03:58
  that there is no shame there's no shame so i think we need to take a step back
• 1:04:02
  and stop being so embarrassed about sex that we're not we're not celebrating
• 1:04:07
  it and we're not enjoying it because we're shaming people into the closet i
• 1:04:14
  don't think there's such a thing anymore there is yes,
• 1:04:17
  Because you can't talk to certain people about it. Yeah, it's true.
• 1:04:20
  But if you want to truly pleasure yourself, if you want to truly pleasure your
• 1:04:25
  partner, these sex toys give you that.
• 1:04:28
  Right. And you have to be truthful to yourself. Be true to yourself.
• 1:04:32
  Now, some people don't want this. Maybe some people have amazing sex without
• 1:04:36
  the sex toys, which is fine. Right.
• 1:04:38
  But I will say sex toys really spice up a relationship.
• 1:04:42
  For sure. They add value to the relationship.
• 1:04:45
  They make it enjoyable for you and your partner.
• 1:04:49
  Now, I'm not saying you have to have sex toys every time. No.
• 1:04:53
  This is just a once in a while fun thing to do. Right.
• 1:04:56
  This should just spice up a little. Spice up that relationship.
• 1:05:01
  And then also make sure you get the right type of lubricant.
• 1:05:04
  And you enjoy each other. That's the key.
• 1:05:07
  Enjoy each other. And have fun with this. Right. This is not a chore.
• 1:05:11
  And I can honestly say I've had sex with people. that after years, it felt like a chore.
• 1:05:18
  No, it's not a chore. They didn't want to do anything different.
• 1:05:20
  They wanted the exact same thing. They knew how to please me.
• 1:05:22
  They knew they could get me off. It would happen.
• 1:05:24
  Then we'd have sex. Then it'd be over. And I was just like, oh, my God, not again. Yeah.
• 1:05:27
  This is going to add variety. Let's say your partner is not very long,
• 1:05:31
  so they have to do missionary every time. Right.
• 1:05:34
  This will definitely add to it. Right. Now, a partner that could only do missionary
• 1:05:39
  before can now do doggy style.
• 1:05:42
  You could do all kinds of things. And a partner that couldn't do side-spooning
• 1:05:45
  sex before can now do side-spooning sex.
• 1:05:48
  See, it helps you explore in different sizes. It allows the man to be empowered, not just the woman.
• 1:05:54
  So empowerment is our message of the day, not just sex toys.
• 1:05:58
  Right. We are all about male and female empowerment in the bedroom.
• 1:06:02
  Right. Now, remember, we're not about violence. Right. We're not about hurting your partner.
• 1:06:08
  We're not about abuse. Right. So be careful and make sure you guys are respectful of each other.
• 1:06:13
  Right. We are about pleasure each other. Pleasure.
• 1:06:16
  Pleasure and empowerment. Right.
• 1:06:19
  That's it. So, I hope you learned something today. I've learned a lot of things
• 1:06:24
  I don't know about anybody.
• 1:06:26
  So, it's kind of fun. That is awesome. I have learned a lot today.
• 1:06:31
  Yes, you have. Well, I've enjoyed today. Me too. That's been fun today.
• 1:06:36
  It has been fun. Well, Diva Cat, I think I'm ready to go.
• 1:06:39
  Oh, me too.
• 1:06:42
  We're a little excited over here on this head. This is Diva Mia signing off.
• 1:06:46
  Diva Cat, talk to you soon. Hope you enjoyed it. Enjoy it and have a wonderful, playful week. See ya.
• 1:06:55
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• 1:07:01
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• 1:07:18
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• 1:07:20
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• 1:07:22
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• 1:07:25
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• 1:07:26
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• 1:07:47
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