Latest / The Parenting Podcast / Home and the Holidays (Pt. 1) | Ep. 55

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Home and the Holidays (Pt. 1) | Ep. 55 · The Parenting Podcast

• 1:08
  Cheryl: I don't know about you, but I'm enjoying the holidays.
• 1:11
  christie: Mm.
• 1:12
  christie: I am.
• 1:13
  christie: Love it.
• 1:13
  christie: It is just, it's my favorite time of year.
• 1:15
  christie: Yeah.
• 1:16
  christie: Oh yeah.
• 1:16
  christie: It really is.
• 1:17
  christie: I love all the parties.
• 1:19
  christie: I don't know about the busyness.
• 1:20
  christie: I'm torn as I get older.
• 1:22
  christie: I used to love the busyness but I, I kind of appreciate a fire and some hot tea too.
• 1:27
  christie: So, Yeah.
• 1:28
  christie: I, I do love all the festivities though.
• 1:31
  Cheryl: Oh, of course.
• 1:32
  Cheryl: You're a party girl.
• 1:33
  Cheryl: Yes, yes, I
• 1:34
  christie: do.
• 1:34
  christie: So a whole month of it.
• 1:35
  christie: Yes.
• 1:36
  christie: Now as, as the mom of a big family, sometimes I like when someone else, theres the party, but
• 1:40
  Cheryl: yeah.
• 1:41
  Cheryl: I just enjoy the decorations like particularly where we're recording right here.
• 1:46
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 1:47
  Cheryl: I love.
• 1:49
  Cheryl: I guess it's l e d lights.
• 1:50
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 1:51
  Cheryl: Those beautiful Blue Street.
• 1:52
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 1:52
  Cheryl: Yeah, what color blue do you call that?
• 1:54
  Cheryl: That's that fantastic color blue.
• 1:56
  Cheryl: Like an arctic blue.
• 1:57
  Cheryl: Hmm.
• 1:58
  Cheryl: I don't know, but I love that blue ice blue.
• 2:00
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 2:00
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 2:00
  Cheryl: It is gorgeous and mm-hmm.
• 2:02
  Cheryl: just enjoying it.
• 2:03
  Cheryl: And, um, I don't like all of it early.
• 2:07
  Cheryl: Like the fact that like Hobby Lobby, right.
• 2:10
  Cheryl: Starts their stuff in June.
• 2:12
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 2:12
  Cheryl: I give
• 2:13
  christie: Hobby Lobby a pass because of You're a crafter.
• 2:15
  christie: You need it a little early.
• 2:16
  christie: That's, and they explain that to you?
• 2:17
  christie: Yes.
• 2:18
  christie: But yeah, if I'm walking through the mall, hold off on your Santa.
• 2:22
  christie: Yes.
• 2:22
  christie: I'm a traditionalist in that way.
• 2:24
  Okay, wait just a minute.
• 2:25
  I have have to ask you a very serious matter what.
• 2:29
  White Christmas lights or multicolored
• 2:31
  Cheryl: Well, growing up, everything was multicolored.
• 2:36
  Cheryl: Oh, okay.
• 2:36
  Cheryl: And everybody had the same kind of lights.
• 2:38
  Cheryl: Now you can get so many different kinds.
• 2:39
  Cheryl: Right, right.
• 2:40
  Cheryl: But the ones that were completely colored, they were totally opaque.
• 2:44
  Cheryl: Oh, Uhhuh.
• 2:45
  Cheryl: And so those everybody.
• 2:47
  Cheryl: Those when they're Christmas trees.
• 2:49
  Cheryl: That's all there was.
• 2:50
  Cheryl: Uhhuh, And so we used to have those.
• 2:51
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 2:52
  Cheryl: And then when we changed and had different kind of updated ones, that was a big discussion in our family of those that wanted Colored lights,, right?
• 3:01
  Cheryl: Uhhuh, versus the white, the house divided.
• 3:04
  Cheryl: It was I house divided.
• 3:06
  Cheryl: And so we've all gone to white.
• 3:08
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 3:09
  Cheryl: But then the secondary question to that is twinkle or non
• 3:12
  twinkle.
• 3:12
  Oh.
• 3:13
  Twinkles have their place.
• 3:14
  I, so I'm white.
• 3:16
  Lights me through and through.
• 3:17
  Good.
• 3:17
  And I think we're all in agreement at my house.
• 3:20
  Good.
• 3:21
  We are now.
• 3:21
  Now.
• 3:21
  Okay.
• 3:22
  Well, my husband would like to have colored lights on the outside.
• 3:26
  Oh.
• 3:26
  But my grandma always had white lights on her house.
• 3:28
  My dad always did.
• 3:29
  I just loved'em.
• 3:30
  They're just so classic and timeless.
• 3:32
  And now I will forgive colored lights if they're red and.
• 3:35
  I, you know, just like I'm very traditional in my day.
• 3:38
  What your, this is outside?
• 3:39
  Outside?
• 3:40
  Yes.
• 3:40
  Inside on the tree.
• 3:41
  Always white lights.
• 3:42
  And I, I don't mind a good twinkle if it, if it's not too obnoxious.
• 3:46
  Yeah, if it's
• 3:46
  Cheryl: not too obnoxious.
• 3:47
  Cheryl: Except I would go with blue.
• 3:48
  Cheryl: That beautiful l e d
• 3:51
  blue.
• 3:51
  Oh yeah.
• 3:52
  That is pretty, yeah.
• 3:53
  Kind of like makes, think of ice.
• 3:54
  Yeah.
• 3:55
  Mm-hmm.
• 3:55
  Yeah.
• 3:56
  Cheryl: I'm glad we're getting these things establi.
• 3:57
  Cheryl: They are
• 3:58
  very important things to, I mean, if you're looking into like marriage or a serious relationship, you should always start with these things.
• 4:03
  Cheryl: Of course.
• 4:03
  Cheryl: And now I have another one.
• 4:04
  Cheryl: Eggnog.
• 4:05
  Cheryl: No.
• 4:06
  Cheryl: Oh, Christie, we have a rift in
• 4:09
  our relationships.
• 4:10
  Oh, no, I can't cider.
• 4:12
  Oh, I like hot, A hot apple
• 4:14
  Cheryl: cider.
• 4:15
  Cheryl: And I understand about eggnog.
• 4:17
  Cheryl: It's distinctive, but mm-hmm.
• 4:19
  Cheryl: uh, those of you happen to be anywhere near Oklahoma.
• 4:23
  Cheryl: Brahms has the best eggnog.
• 4:24
  Cheryl: I
• 4:25
  do hear that.
• 4:25
  Yes.
• 4:26
  From the nog lovers.
• 4:27
  I do,
• 4:27
  Cheryl: I do hear that.
• 4:28
  christie: but Um, some people might not be in a Brahms area.
• 4:32
  christie: They might, sorry, y'all, I'm missing out.
• 4:33
  Cheryl: Maybe you can have it imported, you know, Like my son who now lives in India.
• 4:38
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 4:39
  Cheryl: loved the eggnog.
• 4:40
  Cheryl: Aw.
• 4:40
  Cheryl: So when he came back here a few weeks ago,, we drove straight
• 4:45
  to the store.
• 4:45
  Oh, I bet no Brams in India.
• 4:47
  Cheryl: No, they're no Brams.
• 4:48
  Cheryl: So, Now we've those two.
• 4:50
  Cheryl: Are there any other crucial
• 4:52
  questions we have to resolve?
• 4:53
  Yes.
• 4:54
  There's a new trend that's an old trend that's returning.
• 4:57
  Like all good trends do.
• 4:59
  that's me.
• 5:00
  And um, I don't love it.
• 5:02
  It's what?
• 5:03
  The silver tinsel, the stringy kind, not the roped kind, but the stringy kind.
• 5:09
  Even when I was a kid, I remember we used it sometimes and I didn't like it.
• 5:12
  It's messy.
• 5:13
  It falls off the tree and.
• 5:16
  Cheryl: Christie, we've got another division going on here, Cheryl.
• 5:18
  Cheryl: How are we friends?
• 5:20
  Cheryl: I don't know.
• 5:21
  Cheryl: I love the tinsel.
• 5:23
  Cheryl: It's the last thing again.
• 5:24
  Cheryl: It's that icy uhhuh look and if you backed up and you looked at the tree and you blurred your eyes, it, the tins on the light.
• 5:33
  So, but it, I think its takes, it's coming work to get it.
• 5:36
  Not clumpy on
• 5:37
  Cheryl: the truth.
• 5:37
  Cheryl: Not true.
• 5:38
  Cheryl: It's one of the hard things of life.
• 5:40
  Cheryl: Right.
• 5:40
  Cheryl: But it's true.
• 5:41
  Cheryl: All my kids oh, we wanna do it.
• 5:42
  Cheryl: We wanna do it cuz this is the last thing you do.
• 5:44
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 5:44
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 5:45
  Cheryl: And then they'd throw the big globs.
• 5:46
  Yes.
• 5:46
  So, no, I've seen it quite a bit.
• 5:49
  I, I don't know if it's a one, one year wonder, one one hit wonder or what, but,
• 5:53
  Cheryl: I don't think I'd go back to it because of the cleanup.
• 5:56
  Cheryl: Yes.
• 5:56
  Cheryl: So, yeah.
• 5:57
  Cheryl: I used to not care so much about that, but now without it, it's kind of like, let's go back to cloth
• 6:03
  diapers, right?
• 6:04
  Yeah.
• 6:05
  Is it worth the effort?
• 6:06
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 6:06
  Cheryl: It's too much effort.
• 6:07
  Cheryl: Uhhuh.
• 6:08
  Cheryl: okay.
• 6:08
  Cheryl: obviously it's thematic here we're in, um, holiday season.
• 6:14
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 6:14
  Cheryl: and So how about if we just talk about some more ideas from our lives and yeah, just different ways of seeing the holidays.
• 6:22
  Cheryl: I
• 6:22
  christie: love that.
• 6:23
  christie: I love hearing from other people, so hopefully our listeners will wanna hear some of our thoughts and ideas.
• 6:28
  Cheryl: Christie, I don't know if we mention.
• 6:30
  Cheryl: to our listeners that you lost your dad this year.
• 6:32
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 6:33
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 6:33
  Cheryl: I don't remember, but, um, I did ask your permission.
• 6:37
  Cheryl: Is it okay?
• 6:38
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 6:38
  Cheryl: Do you feel like doing holiday, because there is a serious aspect to the holiday, right?
• 6:43
  Cheryl: And there's loss.
• 6:44
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 6:44
  Cheryl: or grief?
• 6:45
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 6:46
  Cheryl: and of what do you think, what about if we talk on this episode about the lighter side, maybe?
• 6:52
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 6:53
  Cheryl: and then follow up in our next conversation.
• 6:56
  Cheryl: Maybe the heavier part to the holiday.
• 7:00
  Cheryl: Yeah, I think that's
• 7:01
  christie: good.
• 7:01
  christie: You know, I heard the other day a quote that holidays can be an amplifier of our, of our wow.
• 7:07
  christie: Everyday life.
• 7:08
  christie: That's good.
• 7:08
  christie: I think that is really good because.
• 7:10
  christie: Like I said, it is my favorite time of the year, and so I'm still experiencing all the joy and fun things that happen.
• 7:17
  christie: Um, but there's a weight and a cloud mm-hmm.
• 7:20
  christie: that comes with it, and I'm sure there's others experiencing similar situations or hardships, and so hopefully that.
• 7:27
  christie: That can be an encouragement.
• 7:27
  christie: We can just face the reality that, that that's how holidays are sometimes.
• 7:31
  christie: Okay.
• 7:31
  Cheryl: mm-hmm.
• 7:32
  Cheryl: Let's talk about the fun.
• 7:33
  Cheryl: Yes.
• 7:33
  Cheryl: And the light, and then we'll come back with the more serious.
• 7:37
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 7:37
  Cheryl: All right.
• 7:38
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 7:39
  Cheryl: I had fun last night cuz it is very different for me.
• 7:42
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 7:43
  Cheryl: So widowed an empty nest.
• 7:45
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 7:46
  Cheryl: Um, I'm having to shape my holiday and the cheer and the joy.
• 7:52
  Cheryl: Very different but last night I actually made some choices about how I was gonna decorate again and, and choosing.
• 8:00
  Cheryl: to connect with it myself.
• 8:02
  Cheryl: That's good.
• 8:03
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 8:03
  Cheryl: and well, so Hobby Lobby, if you want to, you're welcome to sponsor us.
• 8:08
  Cheryl: So I just thought, I know, I think I want such and such and I went and of course, you know, they have their percentage of Oh yes.
• 8:15
  Cheryl: And I'm really glad I found some things.
• 8:17
  Cheryl: I was really happy that brought me.
• 8:20
  Cheryl: In my decorating.
• 8:21
  Cheryl: Yeah, that's really good.
• 8:21
  Cheryl: And then, Doing the tree alone is kind of hard.
• 8:25
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 8:26
  Cheryl: But I love, cuz I mean, I have grandchildren here.
• 8:28
  Cheryl: Mm.
• 8:28
  Cheryl: So then I wait and let them do it and I don't redecorate the tree.
• 8:34
  Cheryl: So I have a whole lot of clusters.
• 8:37
  Cheryl: Oh.
• 8:37
  Cheryl: Of decorations.
• 8:38
  Cheryl: I love that.
• 8:39
  Cheryl: You know, I love that.
• 8:40
  Cheryl: So
• 8:41
  christie: that's fun.
• 8:41
  christie: Well, I confessed to redecorating a little bit.
• 8:44
  christie: Never even, well, when my kids were young I didn't because.
• 8:48
  christie: They would maybe see me move their stuff.
• 8:50
  christie: They would remember.
• 8:51
  christie: But we did have a bunch of teens and young adult stickering this year and, and they did good.
• 8:55
  christie: But when everyone left and went home, I was like, oh, I kind of think I want these over here.
• 9:00
  christie: And, and added some different ones that they didn't really like.
• 9:03
  christie: I'm the one there to look at it, so.
• 9:04
  christie: Mm-hmm.
• 9:04
  christie: nobody's there, so isn't
• 9:06
  Cheryl: that nice?
• 9:06
  Cheryl: We get to be, you know, you get to be in control.
• 9:09
  Cheryl: So what are some of your special treats or special memories or something you do that you enjoy?
• 9:16
  christie: Well, one thing you say treats.
• 9:18
  christie: We always have a baking day.
• 9:20
  christie: Oh.
• 9:20
  christie: Listener to Christmas day.
• 9:22
  christie: And um, that was actually something my.
• 9:24
  christie: Started several years ago.
• 9:26
  christie: Yeah.
• 9:27
  christie: Um, candy making was more what I remember my grandmothers and my mom doing when I was young.
• 9:33
  christie: They would make like the hard candies and Wow.
• 9:36
  christie: You know, softball stage and all those, oh, I forgot candy thermometer, recipes.
• 9:40
  christie: And, um, we don't do as many of those, but when my mom brought it back up, probably.
• 9:45
  christie: I don't know, 10, 12 years ago she said, Hey, let's get together.
• 9:48
  christie: And we do a ton of cookies.
• 9:50
  Cheryl: Like, so this is not just you and your girls, so this is your whole
• 9:54
  christie: Yeah.
• 9:54
  christie: So family here.
• 9:55
  christie: Right.
• 9:56
  christie: My sister-in-law, nieces and my sister and my mom.
• 9:59
  christie: And so yeah, just anyone that's available.
• 10:00
  christie: We, it's getting harder and harder to find a date.
• 10:02
  christie: Everyone can do it.
• 10:04
  christie: Mm-hmm.
• 10:04
  christie: but mm-hmm.
• 10:04
  christie: We try to go with majority and, and get everyone in there.
• 10:07
  christie: And then you split up the goods at the end.
• 10:09
  christie: Uhhuh.
• 10:10
  christie: Well that's, so that's our dessert on Christmas day.
• 10:12
  christie: Oh, cool.
• 10:13
  christie: So we'll do it close enough where the cookies are still fresh and then yeah, we'll all take goodie bags or boxes, make treat boxes for our neighbors or bosses or, so yeah, it's fun.
• 10:22
  christie: And one thing that was really um, neat that I can't remember if my.
• 10:26
  christie: Thought to do it or somebody suggested we write out the recipes in our own handwriting.
• 10:32
  christie: Everyone Oh yeah.
• 10:33
  christie: Wrote our own recipe cards and, um, decorate a little recipe box so that as generations pass, we have those little kid handwritings Wonderful.
• 10:42
  christie: And older generations handwritings.
• 10:44
  Cheryl: Because that does mean something.
• 10:45
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 10:46
  Cheryl: oh, nice.
• 10:47
  christie: Handwriting is a special thing.
• 10:48
  christie: I feel like we're probably gonna lose in a couple generations, I think.
• 10:52
  christie: But I think so.
• 10:53
  christie: That's really
• 10:53
  Cheryl: special.
• 10:54
  Cheryl: Oh, that's so good.
• 10:55
  Cheryl: It makes me hungry.
• 10:56
  Cheryl: Uhhuh, We're talking about all this, all this sweets.
• 10:58
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 10:58
  Cheryl: One of the things my mother spent so much time making when I was little was fruitcake.
• 11:04
  Cheryl: Oh.
• 11:04
  Cheryl: And I don't like fruitcake.
• 11:06
  Cheryl: I
• 11:07
  christie: don't know that I've ever had fruitcake.
• 11:08
  christie: I've only heard the stories.
• 11:10
  Cheryl: Oh.
• 11:10
  Cheryl: I mean, it's really expensive and it, I like dense cake.
• 11:13
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 11:14
  Cheryl: Why they call that fruit.
• 11:15
  Cheryl: I don't even know what they make those green and red things out
• 11:18
  christie: of, but maybe some kind of dehydrated.
• 11:20
  Cheryl: Just not fruit.
• 11:21
  Cheryl: That was once fruit, you know, and I'm not a fruitcake person.
• 11:24
  Cheryl: Oh.
• 11:24
  Cheryl: But, um, one of our fun things, and I may have mentioned down here before, is we invented.
• 11:31
  Cheryl: our own, day of celebration.
• 11:34
  Cheryl: A few years ago, one of my daughters said, okay, so there's Christmas Day.
• 11:38
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 11:39
  Cheryl: right?
• 11:39
  Cheryl: So an eve is what comes before the actual day, right?
• 11:45
  Cheryl: Christmas Eve.
• 11:46
  Cheryl: New Year's Eve.
• 11:47
  Cheryl: Uhhuh Okay.
• 11:48
  Cheryl: And so then she said, so in the biblical narrative, what came before Eve and it was Adam.
• 11:54
  Cheryl: Oh, that's funny.
• 11:55
  Cheryl: So we came up with Christmas Adam, okay.
• 11:58
  Cheryl: This is
• 11:58
  christie: something that would be the 23rd
• 11:59
  Cheryl: of December.
• 12:00
  Cheryl: It would be the 23rd Uhhuh.
• 12:01
  Cheryl: And so we always have Christmas Adam, and we send greetings each one another saying, you know, happy Christmas Adam.
• 12:07
  Cheryl: And then we try to come up with our own invented celebration.
• 12:11
  Cheryl: And so for us it was.
• 12:12
  Cheryl: Vietnamese, Flo soup.
• 12:13
  Cheryl: Uhhuh And so we just get together and go.
• 12:16
  Cheryl: And like you're saying, it's harder and harder to get everybody together.
• 12:19
  Cheryl: Right?
• 12:20
  Cheryl: So we try to get everybody at least reserve that extra night.
• 12:23
  Cheryl: Yes.
• 12:24
  Cheryl: And then we go together and do it.
• 12:26
  Okay, so, well, this was pre pandemic a couple of years ago.
• 12:32
  We were all together before my son's family left, and so all of us together having our full soup, celebrating Christmas, Adam and actually Christie in the restaurant were two friends and their families and they came over and said, Cheryl, we're celebrating Christmas, Adam.
• 12:53
  And so we shared with them.
• 12:57
  So they had decided to start their tradition and just borrowed the FA soup from us.
• 13:02
  Cheryl: I'm You're kidding.
• 13:03
  Cheryl: That you
• 13:03
  christie: knew Oh, that's so fun.
• 13:05
  Cheryl: Fun, fun.
• 13:07
  Cheryl: And so you don't have to do F soup guys.
• 13:09
  Cheryl: You can do whatever you want to to come up with something.
• 13:13
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 13:13
  Cheryl: just for fun.
• 13:15
  Cheryl: and there's no pressure to it.
• 13:16
  Cheryl: Right?
• 13:17
  Cheryl: So like with all the other busy stuff, it just gives us a pause, just showing up and being together.
• 13:22
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 13:22
  Cheryl: And then what we used to do, when we could gather everybody, then we would buy Brahm Eggnog.
• 13:28
  Cheryl: And go Christmas light looking and Oh, so great.
• 13:30
  Cheryl: Enjoying So it just gave an extra fun night cuz there's so much to do
• 13:35
  christie: right.
• 13:35
  christie: In the next couple of days.
• 13:36
  christie: Well, and like you were saying, as your family ages and it is harder to get everyone together.
• 13:41
  christie: Yes.
• 13:41
  christie: Having more events that people can try to make, it helps you get together a little easier.
• 13:46
  christie: We've always gone and driven around and looked at.
• 13:49
  christie: Um, apparently we really like PJ's cuz we always do this in our PJ's too.
• 13:54
  christie: But we go get hot chocolate at one specific convenience store.
• 13:58
  christie: They, want the hot chocolate from one store and then we'll go look at Christmas lights and.
• 14:03
  christie: last year we realized our family is too big to fit in one car anymore.
• 14:07
  christie: Yes.
• 14:07
  christie: And everyone was so sad.
• 14:09
  christie: They're like, can't we try to squeeze in?
• 14:11
  christie: I'm like, that's not safe or legal.
• 14:12
  christie: We can't do that.
• 14:13
  christie: Mm-hmm.
• 14:13
  christie: And so they wanna hold onto those things.
• 14:16
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 14:17
  Cheryl: And see, that's part of the evolution.
• 14:18
  Cheryl: It's the same thing.
• 14:20
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 14:20
  Cheryl: we can't get everybody in one vehicle.
• 14:22
  Cheryl: Right.
• 14:23
  Cheryl: And that's what's fun is the noise.
• 14:25
  Cheryl: And yes, everybody's looking, singing the songs together and.
• 14:29
  Cheryl: Two cars behind the, it's not as fun, you know, so it's, we have to adopt it's different because family's evolving.
• 14:36
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 14:36
  christie: Yes.
• 14:37
  Cheryl: When my kids live at home.
• 14:39
  Cheryl: Two of my daughters did it.
• 14:40
  Cheryl: Well, they actually shared rooms, all their childhoods, but then as they moved into their teen years and a young adult years before they got married, they would spend the night together on Christmas Eve.
• 14:53
  Cheryl: Oh, and I love that.
• 14:54
  Cheryl: Like if they weren't living at home, they actually.
• 14:57
  Cheryl: Came home and they spent the night together.
• 14:59
  Cheryl: Oh, that's sweet.
• 15:00
  Cheryl: In the same bed.
• 15:01
  Cheryl: That's so sweet.
• 15:02
  Cheryl: Oh, it was wonderful.
• 15:03
  christie: Yes.
• 15:03
  christie: You know, something magical about Christmas night.
• 15:06
  christie: And do you guys, um, do anything special on Christmas Eve then?
• 15:12
  christie: Well,
• 15:12
  Cheryl: traditionally what we did for decades mm-hmm.
• 15:15
  Cheryl: is we would go.
• 15:19
  Cheryl: A church service.
• 15:20
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 15:20
  Cheryl: And then we would go to Bill's family.
• 15:22
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 15:22
  Cheryl: So his mom and dad would host cuz.
• 15:25
  Cheryl: They thought that Christmas should be celebrated and gifts open on Christmas Eve.
• 15:29
  Cheryl: Oh, Of course, we know that's not the real way.
• 15:33
  Cheryl: We know that Jesus and Mary and Joseph all open their gifts on Christmas.
• 15:37
  Cheryl: On Christmas morning.
• 15:37
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 15:38
  Cheryl: Yes, of course.
• 15:38
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 15:38
  Cheryl: So, but it worked out so well for us.
• 15:41
  Cheryl: So we would go over there and they had the absolute fun of opening all that.
• 15:45
  Cheryl: Family gifts and celebrating and yeah, all of that.
• 15:50
  Cheryl: And then we also had our own Christmas.
• 15:53
  Cheryl: On Christmas morning.
• 15:54
  christie: Okay, well that was probably nice.
• 15:55
  christie: It freed you guys up to be with your own Yes.
• 15:57
  christie: Own family and kids on Christmas morning.
• 15:59
  Cheryl: so we didn't have to go visit grandma and grandpa Right.
• 16:02
  Cheryl: So we just were able to have two different ones.
• 16:04
  Cheryl: Totally focused, but what we do Christmas at home is you stay in your pajamas.
• 16:10
  Cheryl: Oh, and you just Christmas as long you play with toys.
• 16:14
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 16:14
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 16:14
  Cheryl: That's fun.
• 16:15
  Cheryl: And we would open.
• 16:16
  Cheryl: Individual gifts working our way through, not everybody all at once.
• 16:20
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 16:20
  christie: We did that too with our kids, but growing up my husband was shocked because we just did free for all.
• 16:27
  christie: Like I know everyone just opened all at once and then you're yelling, oh, thank you.
• 16:30
  christie: You just, you, you knew just what I wanted and oh, that's for me.
• 16:33
  Cheryl: Don't you know That's what Bill's family did you can't keep track of what people are doing or mm-hmm.
• 16:39
  Cheryl: It's
• 16:39
  christie: a different way.
• 16:40
  christie: Yeah.
• 16:40
  christie: They're different.
• 16:41
  christie: I mean fun in different ways.
• 16:42
  christie: Yes, yes.
• 16:43
  christie: So my parents were divorced when I was really young.
• 16:46
  christie: Mm-hmm.
• 16:46
  christie: So I was seven, so I grew up, used to lots of Christmas celebrations.
• 16:52
  christie: Wow.
• 16:52
  christie: So one day was not enough to contain all the family's houses and grandparents and everything.
• 16:57
  christie: So, um, it actually kind of made it exciting in a lot of ways to get to stretch the holiday out.
• 17:03
  christie: But our tradition with my dad's family, For years.
• 17:07
  christie: And then my grandparents passed and it was just at my dad's house was mm-hmm.
• 17:10
  christie: at Christmas Eve we wear our pajamas and eat breakfast for dinner.
• 17:14
  christie: Oh.
• 17:15
  christie: And that's just been something so fun that my kids love.
• 17:18
  christie: And you get to have, you know, all the sweet.
• 17:21
  christie: breakfast treats, you know, sweet, uh, cinnamon rolls and Oh, yeah.
• 17:25
  christie: Pancakes and all of that for dinner.
• 17:28
  christie: And, and then I loved it when the kids were young because they were already in their PJs.
• 17:31
  christie: So we just go straight home, put'em to bed and, okay.
• 17:35
  Cheryl: So did you get gifted the PJs when you got there?
• 17:39
  Cheryl: Or y'all bought'em before you So every year, new PJs,
• 17:42
  christie: usually we had another event in the month that was a PJ event.
• 17:46
  christie: Oh.
• 17:47
  christie: And so we kind of made it.
• 17:49
  christie: An outing where we'd go and pick new PJs.
• 17:51
  christie: In fact, my youngest that's still at home, I just bought her new PJs yesterday.
• 17:55
  christie: Oh, for the occasion.
• 17:56
  christie: So, yeah, that's kind of a thing too.
• 17:58
  christie: We didn't do the matching monogram like, you know, some families really go all out for the matching PJs, but usually it was some kind of like cartoon character or Santa or something, cutesy.
• 18:09
  christie: But
• 18:09
  Cheryl: you know, To the degree we can.
• 18:12
  Cheryl: It's so much fun to tap into that magic.
• 18:14
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 18:15
  Cheryl: of the fun of the different things that you do.
• 18:18
  Cheryl: You mentioned food, I do make fantastic Christmas cinnamon rolls.
• 18:25
  Cheryl: Oh man.
• 18:25
  Cheryl: I mean, they are, I will say you're the big baker and all this, and I'm more practical, but I put my money into my Christmas rolls.
• 18:34
  Cheryl: The problem is it takes all
• 18:36
  christie: day.
• 18:36
  christie: I was gonna say, yeasty breads are different.
• 18:38
  christie: That's different than just baking cookies.
• 18:40
  Cheryl: And so you have to let it rise three different times it was a challenge when I had all the children at home.
• 18:46
  Cheryl: Oh, I bet.
• 18:47
  Cheryl: that's how, I don't know how some of these families do all this cooking.
• 18:50
  Cheryl: Right.
• 18:50
  Cheryl: I've never
• 18:50
  christie: done cinnamon rolls
• 18:52
  Cheryl: like that.
• 18:52
  Cheryl: Well, but anything mm-hmm.
• 18:53
  Cheryl: To do it all at one time, so you're getting ready for all the food for the day and all the Christmas and rapping and go.
• 19:02
  Cheryl: A church service and parenting and do the rolls and parenting.
• 19:08
  Cheryl: It was, um, a lot.
• 19:10
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 19:10
  Cheryl: I have spent most Christmas eves staying up really late, like even two o'clock in the morning.
• 19:17
  Cheryl: Wow.
• 19:18
  Cheryl: Not on decorating or rapping.
• 19:21
  Cheryl: Uhhuh But getting the cinnamon rolls so they would be ready to be Oh sure.
• 19:24
  Cheryl: Cooked in the morning.
• 19:25
  Cheryl: But they're worth it.
• 19:26
  christie: They're worth, I'll tell you that.
• 19:27
  christie: That sounds just so
• 19:28
  Cheryl: good right now.
• 19:30
  Cheryl: And so I asked the kids a few years ago, cause everybody's grown now, nobody's living in the house.
• 19:34
  Cheryl: And I go, can.
• 19:35
  Cheryl: Stop that what you're telling us Santa is dead.
• 19:40
  Cheryl: No, mom.
• 19:41
  Cheryl: No, we won't.
• 19:42
  Cheryl: The rolls.
• 19:43
  Cheryl: And so that's really fun.
• 19:44
  Cheryl: So that's mostly our breakfast on Christmas morning in your pajamas..
• 19:48
  Cheryl: Oh.
• 19:48
  Cheryl: And then we realize we gotta bring something in.
• 19:50
  Cheryl: So my daughter's been reading, bringing a, um, like an egg casserole Right.
• 19:55
  Cheryl: To have something
• 19:56
  christie: protein to balance all that sugar
• 19:57
  Cheryl: out.
• 19:58
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 19:58
  Cheryl: And, but you know, and we're gonna talk more about it next time, but like, What we did traditionally as a family, it's different because our family's evolving.
• 20:08
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 20:08
  Cheryl: and as your children grow and you get grandchildren and they have different things they want or like Right.
• 20:15
  Cheryl: Trying to figure out what meal to have on Christmas Day, it's been a little bit complicated because their taste of change from what it was and.
• 20:25
  Cheryl: uh, still venturing, trying to figure that out, right?
• 20:28
  christie: We've done different things that aren't traditional On Christmas day, I think one year we had tacos and, you know, diff because we just had Turkey and ham and all of that on Thanksgiving.
• 20:38
  Cheryl: Okay, so you mentioned that you had tacos one Christmas.
• 20:42
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 20:42
  Cheryl: So I think that's what we'll do and have it be MEUs em E X.
• 20:49
  Cheryl: M a s Maxima, you know?
• 20:51
  Cheryl: And so it's something that can be prepared ahead of time and different people like different things.
• 20:56
  Cheryl: It's not just one entree.
• 20:59
  Cheryl: Uh Oh, I like that.
• 21:01
  Cheryl: So thank you you, I think you've helped us figure out a new tradition.
• 21:05
  christie: Oh yeah.
• 21:06
  christie: that is good I, I think it's just, it doesn't matter.
• 21:09
  christie: It's just whatever's fun for everyone and enjoyable and gets everyone together.
• 21:13
  christie: And yes, those are the priorities I think.
• 21:16
  Cheryl: And with all that busyness, trying to have something that doesn't.
• 21:21
  Cheryl: Take as much time Right as I would rather spend time with my family and
• 21:24
  christie: having fun.
• 21:25
  christie: Right.
• 21:26
  christie: Doesn't keep one person in the kitchen and yeah.
• 21:28
  christie: Everyone else is out doing all the fun things
• 21:31
  Cheryl: What we want to do is encourage our listeners, cuz what we're tapping into is how the holidays.
• 21:36
  Cheryl: evolves.
• 21:37
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 21:38
  Cheryl: and things change and there are different things to find your own style.
• 21:41
  Cheryl: Right.
• 21:42
  Cheryl: And be comfortable with it.
• 21:44
  Cheryl: And you know, I continually feel, compassion for.
• 21:49
  Cheryl: Parents that are in the Instagram and the TikTok
• 21:54
  christie: age here.
• 21:55
  christie: No, the comparison.
• 21:56
  christie: So thick and hard to fight,
• 21:58
  Cheryl: you know, because if I looked and I saw you have all your delicious foods that you have made and you've got all the monogram pajamas and your, all of that, the condemnation, right?
• 22:12
  Cheryl: That, oh, we're just having fun.
• 22:16
  Cheryl: you know, our homemade cocoa sitting in front of the tree together and laughing.
• 22:20
  Cheryl: Yeah.
• 22:20
  Cheryl: But then we're
• 22:20
  christie: missing the point's when we get That's right.
• 22:22
  christie: So wrapped up on the externals and, you know, the, there's the quote, people won't remember what you say to them as much as how they feel when they're with you.
• 22:30
  christie: And I think that's true of the holidays, that it, it's not so much about the how many presents or, you know, if all the things were just so.
• 22:40
  christie: It's more about being together.
• 22:42
  christie: And I know that sounds so cheesy and lame, but it's true.
• 22:45
  christie: But it
• 22:45
  Cheryl: really is true.
• 22:46
  Cheryl: And um, also, To cultivate being comfortable with your style.
• 22:52
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 22:52
  Cheryl: Okay.
• 22:53
  Cheryl: That I could never make cookies that look like what you produce, but I wanna be content with who I am and what I do.
• 23:02
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 23:02
  Cheryl: So all of us have joy.
• 23:04
  Cheryl: Right.
• 23:04
  Cheryl: And to look for, you know, just like you're saying, the togetherness, trying to do that.
• 23:10
  christie: I like to say a lot.
• 23:11
  christie: Just because you can doesn't mean you should.
• 23:13
  christie: And so yes, I can.
• 23:14
  christie: That's very good.
• 23:15
  christie: Make a great spread of a table if I wanted to.
• 23:18
  christie: But you know, this year especially, I'm learning, um, there.
• 23:23
  christie: There's just a lot of things I didn't do this year with, you know, walking through grief and everything.
• 23:28
  christie: We'll talk more about that next week, but just finding what feels doable and sustainable for you and your resources and your means and your family and the margin that you have without being completely spent, so much so that you're not getting to really enjoy and savor the moments together and, and celebrating the whole reason we have a holiday
• 23:49
  Cheryl: season.
• 23:50
  Cheryl: That is exactly right That just brings riches to anything we do.
• 23:54
  Cheryl: and.
• 23:55
  Cheryl: How I wish I'd been more like this, when I was younger.
• 23:58
  Cheryl: like I say this every week, I think yeah.
• 24:01
  Cheryl: Yes.
• 24:02
  christie: I, I agree wholeheartedly.
• 24:03
  christie: And, and not having expectations that we bring from our childhoods or how things were done in the past, or, I mean, maybe you might have some things that you hold onto mm-hmm.
• 24:13
  christie: That you really love, as long it's not robbing joy from you or your
• 24:17
  Cheryl: family.
• 24:17
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 24:18
  Cheryl: And.
• 24:18
  Cheryl: you know, you mentioned the reason, you know, as a Christian I can't separate out mm-hmm.
• 24:24
  Cheryl: the coming of the rescuer
• 24:26
  Jesus.
• 24:27
  Cheryl: from all the celebrations.
• 24:28
  Cheryl: Hmm.
• 24:29
  Cheryl: Whether it's Christmas shopping or, uh, looking at the lights.
• 24:33
  Cheryl: Mm-hmm.
• 24:34
  Cheryl: or giving gifts to, to people that I love.
• 24:37
  Cheryl: It just brings the riches because he came to redeem everything.
• 24:42
  Cheryl: Hmm.
• 24:43
  christie: Yeah.
• 24:44
  christie: I agree
• 24:44
  Cheryl: Listeners, we just wish you joy mm-hmm.
• 24:48
  Cheryl: So parents remember through this season in all of'em, hang in.
• 24:54
  Cheryl: Keep loving, keep persevering because it's worth it
• 25:04
  well, I'm so glad you were here with us today at The Parenting Podcast, but we'd like to hear from you.
• 25:10
  What is one favorite family tradition?
• 25:13
  Text us contact@theparentingpodcast.com or go to social media and DM us.
• 25:21
  Let us know.
• 25:22
  This was the lighter side of the holidays, and so next time we're gonna get a little more serious and explore what can sometimes make the holidays hard.
• 25:33
  As always, we hope you'll join us.