Latest / INSPIRE STORY / #094 _STORY INSPIRE: Decisions that transforman with Joey Diaz

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#094 _STORY INSPIRE: Decisions that transforman with Joey Diaz · INSPIRE STORY

• 0:04
  Speaker 1: The Joe Rogan Experience.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night. All day.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: All right, brother. Hey.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: What's happening? What's going on?
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Same shit. Great to be here.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: Great to see you. How you feeling?
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: I sit on my knee like a tip-top fucking Magoo.
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: I can't believe you could walk so quickly after getting
• 0:23
  the knee fixed again.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: It was like three days, man.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: That's nuts.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: But yesterday I fucked it up at Newark Airport. Because
• 0:29
  I wanted to walk, you know, but it was like
• 0:32
  I walk every day at the gym and then I
• 0:34
  walk my neighborhood for breakfast and after dinner. But that's
• 0:38
  a loop, you know. This was 10 loops yesterday. So
• 0:43
  thank God I had a baggie with edibles with me
• 0:44
  on the plane. I ate the edibles and I asked
• 0:47
  the fucking flight attendant if she'd give me some ice
• 0:49
  and that's how I got it down. You rub it
• 0:52
  with that Vortom shit, that liquid cocaine juice. What? Yeah,
• 0:55
  there's a cream that became illegal. You buy it over
• 0:58
  the counter.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: What is that?
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: It's something, Vortom. Don't quote me, man. But it's a
• 1:03
  good cream. It numbs your eye. You have to rub it, though,
• 1:05
  twice a day.
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah?
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but it fucking feels fantastic.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: I've never heard of it.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Voltron, Voltrax. What? Don't listen to me, though.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Just Google. Is that it?
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: That's it, Voltoran. See, I was right.
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: Voltoran, arthritis pain. And you just rub it on your knee?
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah. A couple times a day. Anything that hurts. What
• 1:23
  is it? It's like a fucking gel with cocaine that
• 1:27
  takes care of the fucking situation for you.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: Prescription strength over-the-counter non-steroidal anti-inflammatory that penetrates the skin to
• 1:37
  relieve joint pain, inflammation, and stiffness. Interesting. I never heard
• 1:42
  of it before. Widely used for osteoarthritis and muscle aches.
• 1:45
  Should not be used for acute injuries like simple strains
• 1:48
  or bruises. I wonder why. Why can't you use it
• 1:53
  for strains or bruises? Does it say why? That seems weird. Because, like,
• 1:59
  that's what people use, like, ibuprofen and shit for. I
• 2:04
  wonder why you can't use it for that.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: Like, I couldn't use any of that shit. I could
• 2:07
  only use Tylenol, whatever the fuck that is. I couldn't
• 2:09
  take ibuprofen after the surgery.
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: No? Have you ever used DMSO?
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: I don't know what that is, Joe.
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: It's the shit right here.
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: You rub it on?
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah. That's another horse tranquilizer, another horse medication. Yeah, they
• 2:24
  use it in veterinary applications, but it's really good for
• 2:28
  pain and injury. Take that.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Keep it.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: No, I have a bunch of them.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: I buy shit in bulk.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: We were talking about Lala Zeta. Yeah. That was the
• 2:38
  early steroids, which were the 70s. You don't know what
• 2:41
  the fuck we were getting in the 70s. Everything came
• 2:43
  from Germany, I think.
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: I think they were getting.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Dr. de Roblin, all that shit.
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: I think they were getting human growth hormone from cadavers.
• 2:52
  See if that's true. Jamie, put that into our AI
• 2:55
  sponsor perplexity. Did they used to get human growth hormone
• 2:59
  from cadavers? I think they did. I think that's how
• 3:02
  they used to get it.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: What do you get human growth hormone from now?
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: That's a good question. I don't know. I don't know
• 3:09
  how they do it. It's synthetic. I know it's synthetic.
• 3:12
  So it must be they isolate the molecule, they figure
• 3:15
  out how to reproduce it, and then they make it somehow.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: I have no idea.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: But the way they used to do it back then.
• 3:24
  Cadaver-derived human growth hormone was real used mid-1900s to 1985.
• 3:29
  It turned out to be dangerous because it sometimes transmitted
• 3:33
  prion diseases like Cruxfeldt-Jakob-Jakob. and is no longer used and
• 3:38
  has been fully replaced by synthetic recombinant HDH. So Quetzfeldt-Jakob disease,
• 3:45
  that's mad cow disease. It's the same kind of disease.
• 3:48
  And what it comes from is it's the same thing
• 3:50
  that cannibals get when people eat human brain tissue. They
• 3:55
  get neurons and that kind of shit. You get this
• 3:58
  same disease. Alzada was one of the first U.S. sports
• 4:02
  figures to admit using anabolic steroids in the last year
• 4:05
  of his life as he battled against the brain tumor
• 4:08
  which eventually caused his death. Alzado asserted that his steroid
• 4:13
  abuse directly led to his fatal illness. He recounted his
• 4:16
  steroid abuse in an article in Sports Illustrated. I started
• 4:19
  taking anabolic steroids in 69 and never stopped. Now I'm
• 4:22
  sick and I'm scared. I was addicting mentally. It was
• 4:26
  addicting mentally and mentally addicting. 90% of athletes I know
• 4:30
  are on the stuff were not born to be 300
• 4:32
  pounds or jump 30 feet. I became very violent on
• 4:36
  the field, off it too. I did things only crazy
• 4:38
  people do. Once in 1979 in Denver, a guy sideswiped
• 4:42
  my car. I chased him up and down the hills,
• 4:44
  through the neighborhoods. I did that a lot. I chased
• 4:47
  the guy, pulled out of his car, beat the hell
• 4:49
  out of him. But look at me now. I wobble
• 4:51
  when I walk, and sometimes I have to hold on
• 4:53
  to somebody. You have to give me time to answer
• 4:55
  questions because I have trouble remembering things.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: He died at 43. 43 from brain cancer.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: That's how old I am.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: Wow. He didn't look good at the end. He wore
• 5:05
  the bandanas.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: Alzada was Jewish? It says he was inducted into the
• 5:09
  Jewish Hall of Fame. What did it say? Go back
• 5:13
  to that, what I was just reading.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: International Jewish Hall of Fame.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: Jewish Sports Hall of Fame. I didn't even know that existed. Okay. So,
• 5:29
  I don't know if that was that stuff that Growth
• 5:31
  hormone did that, but.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: Well, listen, he's saying he can't walk at the end.
• 5:35
  He can't remember. That's the. It's also getting hit. The
• 5:37
  knocks to the head. Yeah. And mixed with whatever was
• 5:39
  going on. Yeah.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: I mean, there's a lot.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: With everything else, it becomes something else, you know.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: I lied amidst a massive. That's one of those lies that, like, everybody.
• 5:49
  You know, it's like when bodybuilders say they're natural. Like,
• 5:52
  shut the fuck up, bitch. Nobody's that big. Nobody's that
• 5:56
  big without help. There's a bunch of goofy guys out
• 5:58
  there that still try to claim natural. I'm like, come on, son.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: How many fucking steaks do you eat a day? Like
• 6:04
  the Barbarian Brothers, 36 eggs.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: There's some guys that have freak genetics. They have very
• 6:09
  unusual genetics, and they get real big naturally. But that's rare.
• 6:13
  That's super, super rare.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: As a matter of fact, I got picked up by
• 6:17
  an Uber yesterday. Guess who was the driver? Who? Yoel
• 6:19
  Romero's nephew.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: No way.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: And he's a judo champion.
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: No way.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: We talked in Spanish for about 15, 20 minutes.
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: Was this in Jersey or here? Right here.
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: He lives here. Because all these Uber drivers are Cuban.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: All of them in Austin.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: They're all getting replaced by robots.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: Fuck that. I saw a Cuban yell at a robot.
• 6:36
  Last time I was here, he got out of the car,
• 6:38
  yelled at the car, and he realized, he got back
• 6:41
  in the car. My bad. That's hilarious. The guy cut
• 6:44
  him off.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: They cut you off all the time. He's fucking way much.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: No, I stay away from those.
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: They get right in front of you. They're ridiculous.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: I don't trust those cars at all, and I don't
• 6:52
  see how people sit. I don't. It's not for me, brother.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: Did you hear about that lady? She got into one,
• 6:56
  and a homeless guy was in the back?
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: No.
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, some guy used the Waymo. He got his luggage out,
• 7:02
  left the hatch open, probably figured the thing closed itself.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: It didn't.
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: Homeless guy hopped in, shut the door. Lady gets the Waymo.
• 7:09
  There's a homeless guy in the back. He starts yelling
• 7:11
  at her for paying robots. Why are you paying robots?
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: I got to tell you about my homeless situation this week, Joe. Oh, no.
• 7:19
  So my daughter played at Egg Harbor this weekend. It's
• 7:22
  like 25 minutes outside of Atlantic City. which is an
• 7:25
  hour and a half from my house. So we went
• 7:27
  down for Saturday's tournament. They won. Now we got two
• 7:30
  more games on Sunday. So we got a hotel. I
• 7:34
  didn't want to get a hotel at Ocean's. I'm going
• 7:35
  to be at Ocean's in August, but I didn't want
• 7:37
  to go there because all the other parents were in
• 7:40
  fucking Harris. So I said, fuck it. I don't want
• 7:43
  to be that guy. I'll stay at Harris with you.
• 7:46
  So the game ended, and my wife had to drive
• 7:48
  the kids somewhere, and I go, you know what? Because
• 7:50
  every weekend when I go on those little trips, I
• 7:53
  go to a wheat store. Like last week, I went
• 7:55
  into one in Trenton. Dog, this was a block from
• 7:58
  the state capitol. You could see the dome. The black
• 8:01
  guy called me back and he goes, no, no, no,
• 8:02
  I got a secret place in the back. He had mushrooms,
• 8:06
  mushroom chocolate.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Don't say this. You're going to get in trouble.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Dog, there's 18 stores in fucking, you know, you got
• 8:12
  to figure it out. I'm not ratting nobody out. They
• 8:14
  know what's going on, the cops. I mean, that package, mushrooms,
• 8:18
  all different flavors, blue or white, the whole thing. This
• 8:21
  week I go to Atlantic City. I go to this one, Everald, whatever.
• 8:24
  It's supposed to be the big one. The big one.
• 8:27
  The big weed store in Atlantic City. And it's right
• 8:29
  by the casino. So as I pull up, I park
• 8:32
  my car in front. As I walk out, there's four
• 8:35
  yoked brothers. Yoked with gold chains on in one of
• 8:38
  those fucking suburban millionaire cars. What do you call the
• 8:41
  big truck? Escalades? No, the other one. The one that
• 8:44
  looks like they're attacking your town. Oh, AMG?
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: G-Wagons?
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: I don't fucking know. Anyway, they're in there. Mercedes? They're
• 8:50
  in there bumping shit, and they see me, and they go, yo,
• 8:53
  we know you. And I go, yeah, what up, brother?
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: Hold on.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: I'll catch you on the way out. I thought by
• 8:58
  the time I got out, they would leave.
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: So I went in. I come out, and they're all
• 9:02
  outside their cars. All four brothers, yo, big gold chains, like, yo,
• 9:07
  you're the motherfucker that goes on Rogan. Nah, that's the
• 9:10
  motherfucker from the longest yard. We looked you up. So
• 9:13
  they're talking to me, talking to me, talking. We're rocking
• 9:15
  and rolling. Rogan, the UFC, yo, what do you think
• 9:18
  about that? And I'm loving it. But in the middle
• 9:21
  of all this, this black little homeless crackhead walks his
• 9:24
  way over, and I can hear him ask the other guy,
• 9:27
  who's this white motherfucker? And the black guy goes, that's
• 9:31
  the dude from The Longest Yard, you know, the football movie.
• 9:34
  The black guy comes over, and I see him. Walk
• 9:36
  right over. He goes, hey, Mr. Football Man, why don't
• 9:39
  you break out a dollar for me? He just bummed
• 9:41
  me out a dollar. I had to give him 10.
• 9:43
  I was so fucking embarrassed.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: Why don't you break out a dollar for me?
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: Why don't you break out a dollar for me, Mr.
• 9:48
  Football Star? I gave him a 10. This motherfucker ran.
• 9:51
  He walked up with a limp, but he ran away.
• 9:54
  He was going right for crack. I'm like, these motherfuckers,
• 9:56
  they got a game for everything. I love it. I
• 9:59
  love all that shit. Joe.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: It's fun to be around wacky people every now and then.
• 10:02
  Just people living on the edge.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: But that Atlantic City outside, those casinos, bro, that shit's real.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: We saw a drug transaction right on the street when
• 10:11
  we were down there last.
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Bro, I'm surprised you didn't see a hooker get mugged
• 10:14
  or something like that. They are not fucking around. I
• 10:17
  took a ride Saturday night about 10. Did you take
• 10:19
  a little ride?
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: Sketchy, dude.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Bro, you make a right in some of those corners,
• 10:23
  you ain't coming back.
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: No.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: And I thought by now they'd at least build up
• 10:27
  the outside of AC. No, no, no, no, no.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: No, it's barely making money. You know, AC doesn't do well,
• 10:33
  not like Vegas does.
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: Like, AC's got some nice spots. You can go there
• 10:38
  and have a good time, but it's not like it's
• 10:40
  going to grow.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: The outside is too sketchy.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: The outside's too sketch.
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: The Borgata, all the Italians go down with their white
• 10:46
  shoes on the week. Hey, it's got old. What up?
• 10:48
  But no, I don't like the Borgata that much. I
• 10:51
  like the couple hotels down there.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: There's some nice places.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we stayed in the Borgata when it first opened,
• 10:56
  you and I. You had a gig there.
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: You had a gig there. That's right.
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: The thing is it's not going to grow like Vegas is.
• 11:03
  Vegas is crazy. See, Vegas had a head start. If
• 11:08
  they tried to make Vegas now, ooh, tough sell. Tough sell.
• 11:12
  Too many places to go. You can gamble everywhere. You
• 11:14
  can gamble on your phone now. But when Vegas was
• 11:16
  first– there was no casinos in the country, dog. It
• 11:20
  was just Vegas. And I wonder if they made some
• 11:24
  sort of a deal. Well, let them blow off atomic bombs.
• 11:27
  They blow off these atomic bombs and then we'll put
• 11:31
  the casinos in.
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: What's the difference? I thought that.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: But then we looked it up and it turned out
• 11:35
  they made Vegas before the atomic bomb. So I'm like, well,
• 11:39
  what– I guess it was just gangsters. They just bribed
• 11:43
  people or convinced people. There was nothing going on there.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: It was a pit stop. They opened up Vegas for
• 11:48
  a pit stop for American soldiers to stop on the
• 11:51
  way or something like that.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: Was it in the 30s, right? Was it the 30s, Jamie?
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: Then the guy that owned the comic store.
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: When Vegas was created?
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: Sorry. Yeah, and the guy that owned the Comedy Store,
• 12:02
  he was in charge of Vegas. And he robbed and
• 12:04
  they shot him.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: Same guy as the Comedy Store?
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: Same guy as the Comedy Store.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: He was in charge.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: He's a fucking genius. That motherfucker was a genius. He
• 12:12
  got shot because he stole at the end the expenses.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: Oh, is that what it was?
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: The casinos. In those days, they borrowed money from the
• 12:21
  unions in Chicago. And then you borrowed that and you
• 12:24
  worked off those Teamster loans, those Jimmy Hoffa loans. Oh, yeah.
• 12:29
  So you had to build on those. Well, the expenses
• 12:31
  never stopped. Right. And they were like, what the fuck
• 12:33
  is going on? And he was hanging out with Jane
• 12:35
  Seymour or something, going back and forth like a millionaire,
• 12:38
  like a movie star. And they shot him.
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: That's why they shot him?
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: I think so. They shot him in his house, in
• 12:42
  his eyeball or something.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, in his eyeball.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: Something like that. I remember that.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a picture of his dead body, allegedly, online.
• 12:48
  In L.A., right?
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, in L.A. They shot him in L.A.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: So that was all because of the casinos, huh?
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: But then they made it– it's like when we first
• 12:56
  went to Denver. The money was too good. I don't
• 12:58
  give a fuck if it's Jesus and his three disciples.
• 13:01
  They're going to take that envelope. It's too good.
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: Well, you know what it was going on in the beginning.
• 13:05
  They weren't allowed to use credit cards. Everything had to
• 13:07
  be cash.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: Be cash, yeah.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: And it was crazy. So these guys were leaving the
• 13:11
  fucking– and they bring like six special forces guys with them.
• 13:15
  They'd have fucking Green Berets and Navy SEALs and shit
• 13:18
  like armed to the tits because they're transferring millions of
• 13:21
  dollars in cash. So the whole thing was nuts, man.
• 13:25
  It was nuts. I read this story about the dilemma.
• 13:29
  Like these people are making all this money. And the
• 13:31
  crazy thing is the state was making all that money
• 13:34
  too because the taxes on the legal weed– look this up, please.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: It's amazing.
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: I think it was like 39 percent.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: It's fucking crazy.
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: And everybody was like, sure. Like, you would never accept
• 13:45
  39% on alcohol.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: No.
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: Never accept 39% on ground beef.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: No.
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: But 39% on weed, you're like, I'll take it.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: During the pandemic in L.A., you had to buy an
• 13:54
  extra tax to go open. That's why they called them,
• 13:57
  what do they call those businesses that had to be open?
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: Dispensaries?
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: No, no, no. They're businesses that they had a purpose
• 14:03
  to be open during the pandemic. Oh, right. Essential. Essential.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: They made that essential, but they charged an extra tax,
• 14:10
  10% tax.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: Well, they're making so much money off weed in California.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: But now look at all the weed stores. They're starting
• 14:15
  to close. Are they? And in Jersey, they created a
• 14:18
  dilemma because the state convinced them that they had to
• 14:21
  build and all this shit. So all these places started,
• 14:25
  you know, you're opening up a shop minus three mil. Listen.
• 14:29
  It's a lot of $ 20 bags to get the three mil.
• 14:32
  A lot.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: And not only that, there's a lot of competition. How
• 14:35
  many wheat stores are in L.A.? It's bananas.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: Bro, in English Town, New Jersey, there's four of them,
• 14:39
  and here's where it gets better. They're all on the
• 14:41
  same block. Wow.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: Did you ever go to that place in Englewood with
• 14:45
  me back when it was only medical, the Englewood Wellness Center?
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: Well, you used to get the lollipops. Yeah. Yes. Yeah,
• 14:50
  I went there one time with you.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: You know, the guy that ran that got shot. That
• 14:54
  dude that we used to deal with, he got shot
• 14:55
  in that store.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: They killed him?
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: No, I think he lived. I'm not sure, though.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: Look that up.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: He might have died.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the first place you had the lollipops from
• 15:05
  on Fear Factor. Yes. It was from that guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: Englewood Wellness Center. That was in the 90s. That was
• 15:11
  in the days where it was legal if you had
• 15:15
  a medical reason. And any medical reason would do. Oh,
• 15:18
  my feet hurt. Get in there.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: Sign them up.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: But anybody who does martial arts has the pain excuse
• 15:26
  because everybody's in pain. And it does help you with pain.
• 15:30
  If you could take aspirin, THC, like gummies with CBD
• 15:35
  are phenomenal for aches and pains. You remember Dave Foley?
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: Dave Foley's hand. Of course you do. Dave Foley's hand
• 15:43
  was all fucked up from arthritis. He started taking CBD
• 15:47
  and now his hand is full function again. CBD is amazing.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: They just blew it up out of content a couple
• 15:52
  of years ago.
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: Well, who knows who's making it and what the quality is.
• 15:57
  That's the things when things are gray, you get a
• 15:59
  bunch of douchebags making stuff. You know, I used to
• 16:02
  have a bit about that, about the gummy bears. Like
• 16:04
  they're not making these gummy bears in the same labs
• 16:07
  or they're making Tylenol. They're very inconsistent. You get one
• 16:10
  of them, you swear it's a thousand milligrams and the
• 16:12
  other one feels like it's like a hundred. They barely
• 16:15
  make sense back in the day, back in, you know,
• 16:17
  when it was the Wild West.
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: I got some 500 milligrams in my pocket. They feel
• 16:21
  like 500 milligrams.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: Well, now I don't think you can do that anymore.
• 16:25
  I'm talking about like way back in the day. It
• 16:27
  was different because way back in the day, there was like,
• 16:30
  it was the Wild West.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: First of all, way back in the day, they didn't
• 16:33
  put warnings on this shit. No, no warnings. So you
• 16:35
  didn't know how many milligrams were in this stuff. And
• 16:37
  I remember eating a brownie one time and flying up
• 16:39
  to Pittsburgh in a red eye and my leg wouldn't
• 16:41
  stop tapping. Like it wouldn't stop fucking tapping.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: I remember one time we were on a plane and
• 16:46
  you had a panic attack. And then you waited like
• 16:50
  an hour later and then popped two more. I was like,
• 16:54
  how are you doing that? You're like, Joe Rogan, I
• 16:56
  almost got off the plane. I couldn't take it.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: I couldn't breathe.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: My fucking heart was closing. It was like my chest
• 17:02
  was closing in on me.
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: The walls were closing in.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: I thought the plane was going to crash. I was
• 17:06
  freaking out. I almost had turned the fucking plane around.
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: But I'm back, baby. You just popped two more. You
• 17:11
  have no idea what I put myself through over the years.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: Why do you do that?
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: Because I just want to take a chance. Columbus did.
• 17:18
  I'm sitting at home. It's 2 in the afternoon. You're
• 17:20
  bored as shit. You're like, let's see what happens. And
• 17:24
  the only thing that would hold me back is if
• 17:26
  I had a spot that night. Oh, yeah. Then I
• 17:29
  would tame it and be like a couple hundred milligrams.
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: You don't want to go up on stage with too
• 17:33
  much edible.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: Yes, you do.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: Sometimes.
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: Yes, you do. Sometimes you need to.
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: It's important. Sometimes. Sometimes it's important to go off into
• 17:40
  the woods, right?
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you just stay on the trail.
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but listen.
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: You're filming a special? Stay on the trail.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: Last week I went to do a spot. I figured
• 17:48
  let me wait five weeks. I haven't been on stage
• 17:50
  since April 18th. Let me go do a spot. I'm nervous.
• 17:54
  I get down there and there's 50 people. Perfect. Break
• 17:57
  my cherry. Do it. I got into such a groove,
• 18:01
  I ended up doing an hour. That was because the
• 18:03
  edible I took before I went on stage. No material.
• 18:05
  I told you that. I got nothing.
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: That's it. I'm starting over from scratch. Got nothing. I
• 18:10
  talked about going to the hospital, and then it just
• 18:12
  became something else. And at the end, I was up
• 18:15
  there an hour. Wow. My leg was starting to fucking throb.
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: Did you film it or record it or anything?
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: No. I didn't know it was going to be gold. Right, right.
• 18:23
  But that's why THC... Somebody said THC is... like a
• 18:28
  banned substance for comics because if you really let it
• 18:32
  absorb you, and I'm not telling you to smoke pop,
• 18:34
  but I have an audition. Whenever I have an audition,
• 18:36
  I read it, I put it away. I get stoned,
• 18:41
  and then I go back, and I look at it again,
• 18:43
  complete different sheet. Now I can pick out things. Now
• 18:46
  I can point. Then I leave it again. I get hired,
• 18:49
  and I come back like an hour later, and that's
• 18:52
  what I think THC makes me just rely. Look, I
• 18:55
  live in anxiety naturally. I beat myself up. This morning,
• 19:00
  it's 8.30. I'm drinking coffee outside the fourth season. I'm like,
• 19:03
  why am I heart beating? Because I thought I had
• 19:05
  somewhere to go.
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: I didn't know where to go. You just gave yourself
• 19:09
  anxiety for no reason?
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because I always think I got somewhere to fucking
• 19:11
  go at 10 in the morning. That's why when my
• 19:14
  daughter gets on that bus to school at 7.15, I
• 19:16
  start blasting. Because then I know I ain't got nowhere
• 19:20
  to go. Like, you know, you make a list every
• 19:22
  day and you go, this is what I'm going to
• 19:23
  do today. And then you fucking, you know, Wake up
• 19:28
  and you look at that list after you smoke and
• 19:29
  you're like, that's a long drive up to New York
• 19:32
  City today. I ain't doing that podcast. You know? That's
• 19:36
  a fucking long drive up to that motherfucker.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the driving in New York is not a joke.
• 19:42
  That's an endeavor.
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: You got to take a day. Like, that's your day.
• 19:46
  Your day is driving in and driving out. You're not
• 19:48
  going to the gym.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: Doing all that other stuff. No, I'm saying if you've
• 19:52
  got to drive into New Jersey, that's your day. It's
• 19:55
  not like, oh, I'll go there. That's at noon. I'll
• 19:58
  hit the gym at 2.30.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: Uh-uh.
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: No, you'll be in traffic for three hours.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: For three hours. It's crazy. I always go to do
• 20:04
  that shit early and get it over with. Like, on
• 20:07
  days that I have to go to the city up
• 20:09
  north I'll just take that as a day off. Like
• 20:12
  I'll work that day before so I can go up
• 20:14
  there comfortably and not sweat it. Yeah. Some days I'm like,
• 20:18
  I'm not going up there. I got to work out today.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: Listen, this is one of the big things that Texas
• 20:22
  has or Austin has in particular over the East Coast
• 20:26
  is the fucking traffic. The traffic here is a joke.
• 20:29
  They talk about traffic. It's adorable. You might be 10
• 20:33
  extra minutes.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: Whoop-de-doo. It's adorable.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: Occasionally a car accident happens and there's a bunch of
• 20:39
  people stopped. That shit happens everywhere in the world. But
• 20:43
  for the most part, the East Coast is so thick
• 20:47
  with people. You don't realize it until you have to
• 20:50
  make that trip to New Jersey and back and forth.
• 20:54
  When we do the UFCs, if we go into New
• 20:57
  Jersey to the UFC with the weigh-ins, then we have
• 21:00
  to go back to New York to play pool.
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: At 6 o'clock, that's blue for anybody. Oh, my God.
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: It's crazy. Go to New York to eat and to
• 21:06
  play pool, and it's fucking— it' s a madhouse.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: Think about what it was like the last two weeks.
• 21:12
  Jim Florentine said he went into the city sad it
• 21:14
  was three hours because of the Nick bullshit. They weren't
• 21:17
  even playing. They weren't even playing.
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: People were so upset that Trump was going to go
• 21:23
  to the NBA because if he's there, then they have
• 21:26
  all these crazy security protocols. It makes the traffic even worse.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: There was no parties. There was no nothing.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: He should stick to the UFC. They're going to boo
• 21:34
  him everywhere else.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: I didn't watch the whole game.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: I heard some people cheered. I heard it was like
• 21:39
  cheers and boos. But the problem is if there's cheers
• 21:43
  and any boos, if there's like 50-50, don't go to
• 21:49
  that spot. Go to the UFC. People say he got
• 21:51
  booed at the UFC. I've seen him at the UFC
• 21:55
  six times or something like that. I don't know how
• 21:56
  many times. Never get booed.
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: They love him.
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: He's never gotten booed. They fucking cheer. The people that
• 22:01
  say they're booing him, you're distorting reality. It's not true.
• 22:05
  They cheer him like he walks in there to the
• 22:07
  American Badass song, especially if Kid Rock is with him
• 22:11
  and Dana White's behind him. And then sometimes Tucker Carlson
• 22:14
  was there, too, back when they were close. It was
• 22:17
  like the conservative Avengers. It was like, this is ridiculous.
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: They always cheered him. He was the kiss of death
• 22:21
  last night. I better guess the Knicks last night. Me
• 22:24
  and Jamie, we were like, fuck that. Getting two and
• 22:26
  a half? Why are they only giving two and a half?
• 22:28
  They're up two scams. What are you, a retard? Two
• 22:31
  and a half they were giving last night. Everybody and
• 22:33
  their mother, even fucking your daughter bet the Knicks last night,
• 22:36
  giving two and a half.
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: Do you bet sports all the time? How often do
• 22:42
  you bet?
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: This type of the year, I bet basketball because it's real.
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: Do you use an app?
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: DraftKings. DraftKings? You do it on DraftKings? Everything is on DraftKings.
• 22:52
  You don't have a bookie? No. Yeah. No, I enjoy
• 22:57
  it because DraftKings has so many fun. Like, there's bookies
• 22:59
  out there. Like, they just keep busting these mafia rings
• 23:02
  in Jersey and New York. 39 people had the big
• 23:05
  bust last year with the basketball coaches that they put
• 23:08
  the cards up and you could see through the fucking
• 23:10
  cards on the table. Gambling has grown to a fucking nightmare.
• 23:15
  We're going to pay for this in five years. But
• 23:18
  when I went to college, after orientation, you walked out
• 23:21
  and there was credit card companies, Discover. MasterCard, Visa, and
• 23:25
  they give you a credit card for being a student.
• 23:27
  The 250, automatic, right there. And now, when you go
• 23:31
  to those orientation days, DraftKings is there. You know, the
• 23:35
  other ones, FanDuel's there. And I'm not putting them down.
• 23:37
  I love DraftKings. But you're copping these kids. These kids
• 23:41
  don't have enough problems with fucking student loans. Right. Now
• 23:44
  I'm going to put a fucking thing. More people are
• 23:47
  gambling more than ever. Than ever. Than ever.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: In Australia, too.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: Ever.
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: My buddy McCann, you know James McCann.
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, ever.
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: He was talking about how crazy it is in Australia. Yeah,
• 23:58
  what's the odds on the Ilya Toporia-Justin Gaethje fight at
• 24:02
  the White House?
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: To pick him. No. No.
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: Teporia has to be a huge favorite. I guarantee Teporia
• 24:12
  is 2-1.
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: 4-1. Yeah.
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. 4-1 is crazy.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: 2-1.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: If you just think about what he's done in his
• 24:21
  last three fights, he's had the most legendary run in
• 24:25
  MMA championship history in his last three fights. He knocked
• 24:28
  out three all-time greats. Knocks out Alexander Volkanovsky. Knocks out
• 24:34
  Max Holloway. Knocks out Charles Oliveira. Three in a row. Like,
• 24:38
  anybody who could do that, you go, I'm not fucking
• 24:41
  betting anything against that guy. But Justin Gaethje's a tough character, son.
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: So if I bet $ 25 on Gaethje, I win? $ 100. $ 100. 4-1. Yeah. 4-1. Yeah.
• 24:48
  Which is, look, it's minus 426 for Toporio. They're like,
• 24:49
  4-1's not enough. Caesar says 600. Caesar says 600.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: 600. Caesars is smart. But the thing is, man, don't
• 25:09
  think that Justin Gaethje can't win. Anybody can lose in
• 25:14
  an MMA fight. People get hit. In Iliad Zaporia, one
• 25:17
  of his early fights, I think his first fight in
• 25:20
  the UFC at lightweight, he took it on short notice,
• 25:22
  and he fought this dude, Jai Herbert, who's a really tall,
• 25:28
  really good striker. And Jai Herbert caught him with a
• 25:31
  head kick in the first round. A switch kick to
• 25:34
  the dome that dropped him. It was perfect. But he
• 25:37
  recovered brilliant. He got a hold of him, took him
• 25:40
  to the ground, recovered, and then came back in devastating
• 25:44
  knockout in the second round. Like, he fucking puts people
• 25:48
  into orbit, man. His power is crazy. He's not a
• 25:52
  big guy either, man. Justin's a much bigger guy than him.
• 25:56
  But the way he knocks guys out, it's just dead.
• 25:59
  He knocks them out dead. But so does Gaethje. People
• 26:03
  are forgetting. Gaethje's a fucking warhammer, dude. That guy loves battles.
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: He loves it. I don't think... It's a tough fight, man.
• 26:12
  It's a tough fucking fight. And this is this Sunday, right? Correct?
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: It's this Sunday. Gaethje's bigger. You going? Fuck yeah, I'm going.
• 26:19
  So Gaethje's bigger. Gaethje used to fight at... What was
• 26:25
  it called? The IFL? Whatever the organization was before he
• 26:29
  came to the UFC. I think it was... It was
• 26:32
  before the PFL. It was like another one.
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: But what was it?
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: What did he, what was the organization? You know, there's
• 26:38
  these feeder organizations like the PFL. A lot of really
• 26:41
  good fighters that wind up becoming champions.
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Start out there. Was that it?
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: World Series of Fighting. That's right. That's what it was. And,
• 26:50
  I mean, he was fucking people up with leg kicks.
• 26:52
  But it was the way he was fighting. He would
• 26:55
  just throw himself into chaos. Yeah. Like he didn't fight
• 26:59
  tactically at all back then.
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: No.
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: You ever see the Michael Johnson fight with him in
• 27:04
  the UFC?
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: A long time, yeah.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: It's his first fight in the UFC. It's one of
• 27:07
  the craziest fucking fights ever because he just fucking throws
• 27:12
  himself at Michael Johnson. And Michael Johnson throws himself right
• 27:16
  back and moves up. They got hurt. Both guys got cracked.
• 27:19
  It was a crazy fight. But eventually Justin got him.
• 27:22
  But it was the way he fought. You're like, good lord.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he fights every— Like a pit bull. Like a
• 27:27
  pit bull.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: Like no concern for his safety. Just dive in. It
• 27:30
  was a fucking crazy fight. And look how Dustin is
• 27:34
  always just trying to kill you. He's always moving.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: Look at that.
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: Every shot he's trying to fucking kill you. He's always
• 27:40
  moving forward trying to smash you. And the thing is
• 27:43
  he relishes this kind of combat so much that in
• 27:47
  the beginning he lost some fights that he could have
• 27:50
  won if he tempered it. And then he did. And
• 27:53
  then when he went on this legendary run and started
• 27:56
  beating everybody, it's really because he controlled the violence a
• 28:00
  little bit more. He controlled the chaos. But it was
• 28:03
  still very technical violence. It wasn't like he was brawling dumb.
• 28:08
  He was just forcing himself into chaos so much. He
• 28:12
  was throwing himself right into the fire over and over
• 28:14
  and over again. This is a dangerous fucking guy. He's
• 28:18
  a dangerous fucking guy for anybody. I mean he had
• 28:22
  hit Khabib. He hurt him with some calf kicks. He
• 28:26
  could do that too. He leg kicks you from inside
• 28:28
  the clinch. One of the things that he does really
• 28:31
  well is from like– he could get you with like
• 28:33
  a collar tie and he's leg kicking you. He gives
• 28:36
  him the finger and tells him to get up. I
• 28:37
  mean Michael Johnson is getting battered. This is a tough
• 28:39
  fight for him. At this point, we're in round two.
• 28:42
  Look at that knee to the body. Just everything is
• 28:46
  trying to kill you. It's not like this tactical– take
• 28:51
  a chance here, take a chance there. No, everything's take
• 28:53
  a chance. It's like from the very beginning of the fight.
• 28:56
  And this is how he fought. He eventually took him out.
• 28:58
  But it was a crazy fight.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: He fights like I told you Hagler used to fight.
• 29:03
  They weren't thinking about brain damage. Right. Hagler, all those
• 29:07
  dudes were not thinking about that. We were talking about
• 29:09
  that with football before.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: You know what I just watched the other day? What?
• 29:13
  Mustafa Hampshire.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: I guess.
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: Hagler versus Mustafa Hampshire.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: Did they battle?
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Hagler took him out. But it was just Hagler in
• 29:21
  his prime.
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: He was beautiful. Amazing.
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: So good. He was so good. And he was so
• 29:27
  good at switching stances, man. No one was doing that
• 29:30
  back then. Hagler would fight Southpaw. He would fight Orthodox.
• 29:34
  He would fuck you up. You didn't know where it
• 29:35
  was coming from. And he could fight just as good
• 29:38
  Southpaw as he could Orthodox. It was amazing. It was
• 29:41
  an amazing fight to watch. God, that guy was great.
• 29:44
  So disciplined.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, some good fights this week. I'm excited for the card.
• 29:48
  I thought it was Saturday.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Jamie posted up that the Cyril Ghosn-Alex Pereira fight
• 29:53
  is the closest fight on the card in terms of odds.
• 29:56
  It's like even odds. And that's a Cyril Ghosn's a
• 30:01
  tall order. That's a tall order for your first heavyweight
• 30:03
  fight in the UFC. Caesars has that as a pick-em.
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: A pick-em. Yeah.
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: I would say it's a pick-em. I would say it's
• 30:09
  a pick-em. Cyril Ghosn is really good. And the thing
• 30:13
  about Cyril Ghosn is the problems that he's had in
• 30:16
  fights or when guys take him down. When guys stand
• 30:20
  with him, he is very tricky. He's very slick. He's
• 30:24
  very technical. And he's very light on his feet for
• 30:28
  a big guy. Like, he moves really well. Like, one
• 30:31
  of the best movers in the heavyweight division for sure. He's, like,
• 30:35
  he dances on his feet. He also does a weird
• 30:37
  thing off his front leg. He throws a front kick
• 30:40
  when he's standing sideways, like in a bladed stance like this.
• 30:44
  And he picks it up and twists it into your stomach.
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: Bang!
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: Like that. It's weird.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: It works. Oh, no.
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: It's a kick. I mean it's called a twisting kick.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Twisting kick.
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: It's just you don't ever see people throwing that kick
• 30:57
  from the front leg like he does. Like he does
• 31:01
  a lot of weird shit that you have to get
• 31:03
  used to. Like that Tom Aspinall fight, man, he was
• 31:07
  scoring very well on the feet. I know it got
• 31:09
  stopped because of the eye pokes. But before the eye pokes,
• 31:12
  Cyril Ghosn was doing very well on the feet against Aspinall.
• 31:15
  And Aspinall is a big, fast heavyweight. It's going to
• 31:19
  be interesting because I don't know if Pereira is going
• 31:23
  to have an issue with the movement, if he's going
• 31:25
  to be able to shut that movement down. And I
• 31:27
  don't know if Cyril Ghosn is going to be able
• 31:29
  to like– if he's going to want exchange with him.
• 31:32
  He might feel that power and say, I'm just going
• 31:35
  to fight on the outside because Pereira has got that.
• 31:37
  You make one mistake power.
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: He looks good in heavyweight. He looks like he gained
• 31:42
  the weight. He looks yoked.
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: He's huge. And on top of that, no dieting. So
• 31:48
  no depleting of his body at all. You're going to
• 31:51
  have a guy competing for the first time where he's
• 31:54
  never had to cut weight.
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: That's huge.
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: That's a giant advantage. Not having to cut weight is
• 32:00
  like they let you take steroids. You don't have to
• 32:03
  cut weight. No cutting weight at all. If they changed
• 32:06
  weight cutting, if they cut all weight cutting out of MMA,
• 32:09
  you'd have like 20% better performances. People would be fighting
• 32:12
  so much better. Because they would feel so much healthier.
• 32:16
  They would be so much more durable. There wouldn't be
• 32:18
  as many like one-shot knockouts where you're like, whoa, that
• 32:21
  got them? Because a lot of these guys, like their
• 32:23
  brain is still dehydrated when they're in there fighting. It's
• 32:26
  only 24 hours after they rehydrate. That's not enough time
• 32:30
  to get to the brain.
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: I would go to weigh-ins with you and these guys
• 32:34
  would come in like they're looking like they had cancer.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: They look dead.
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I would see him, and then they would IV
• 32:39
  in the back. And I think they cut out IVs afterwards. Yep,
• 32:42
  cut out IVs. I remember being there with you and
• 32:44
  looking at these guys coming in. They were dying. They
• 32:46
  looked like they were on that fucking GLP for 10 years,
• 32:50
  like fucking Sharon Osbourne's daughter. I mean, they were looking
• 32:53
  fucked up, Jack.
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they looked dead. Some guys looked real. You remember
• 32:56
  when Anderson Silva fought Travis Luter? Do you remember that fight?
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the jiu-jitsu guy from Texas? Exactly. Yes.
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: That was the worst I ever saw anybody at a weigh-in.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: He looked really fucking skinny.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: And, again, this was not the ceremonial weigh-in like we
• 33:08
  have now. This was like the actual weigh-in, see if
• 33:10
  you can make the weight. And Travis couldn't walk. He
• 33:13
  was shuffling. He couldn't pick his legs up. His lips
• 33:16
  were cracked. Like his body was dried out.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: That can't be good for you. Oh. And then to
• 33:21
  pick it back up and then go throw rounds. Exactly.
• 33:23
  Throw punches at 8 o'clock the next night.
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: Meanwhile, I mean, he was so depleted. But he got
• 33:29
  a hold of Anderson the first round. It took him down.
• 33:31
  And that's what he wanted to do. And it's Travis Luton.
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: Did you just do in Texas? Yeah.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's Kevin Holland's coach.
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: Oh, shit, is he? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: Travis is a bad motherfucker, dude.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: Travis is a bad motherfucker.
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: When guys rolled with him on The Ultimate Fighter, one
• 33:46
  of the best compliments one of the guys said, he goes, dude,
• 33:48
  I've rolled with only a couple guys like that. It's
• 33:50
  like him and Ricardo Laborio. I go, really? I go,
• 33:53
  that guy feels like Ricardo Laborio? He's that level?
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: He goes, shh.
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: He's like, dude, he was running through people. Just running
• 34:00
  through people on the ground. Travis was a beast. He
• 34:03
  was one of the first truly elite Brazilian jiu-jitsu black
• 34:07
  belts in the modern era, the Anderson Silva era. Whereas
• 34:10
  when he got guys to the ground, you were in trouble.
• 34:13
  You were in real trouble. There's a few guys. Charles
• 34:16
  Oliveira is the big one. Charles Oliveira puts people in positions.
• 34:19
  They're like, oh, no, what have I done? You think
• 34:21
  you're going to be comfortable in his guard? Bitch, you're
• 34:24
  never going to be comfortable on the ground with Oliveira.
• 34:27
  Oliveira is just so dangerous everywhere.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: That's 20 years of jiu-jitsu, correct? Oh, yeah. 25 years.
• 34:31
  They've been doing it since they were a kid. Yep.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: Great camp. He's from that shoot-the-box camp. I mean, that
• 34:37
  camp produced Anderson Silva, Ninja, Shogun. Like, who else? Pele. Pele,
• 34:47
  one of the original MMA fighters back in the bare-knuckle days.
• 34:51
  He was the top dude in the original days. No,
• 34:55
  Nogueira's not from shoot-the-box. Noguera is a Carlson Gracie guy.
• 35:00
  Those— what is he? He's Carlson Gracie, right?
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: No. Carlson's in Chicago?
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: No, Noguera wasn't Carlson Gracie. Noguera was— I don't want to
• 35:10
  get that wrong. Who was Noguera's trainer? Minotauro Noguera, his
• 35:15
  original jiu-jitsu coach.
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: His fucking brother, probably.
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: No, both of them were elite.
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: They were twins. They were twins, right?
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they were twins. They were both elite. They were both, like,
• 35:26
  world-class fighters in pride. Does it say his jiu-jitsu coach?
• 35:36
  Minotaur was the first, like, he was the first guy
• 35:39
  that was, like, finishing elite guys off of his back
• 35:44
  in pride. Like, he was tapping to, like, when he
• 35:47
  was the champion in pride, like, You remember when he
• 35:49
  beat Bob Sapp?
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: No.
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: Bob Sapp was 350 pounds with abs, and the fight
• 35:57
  was crazy. He picks Minotauro up and spikes him on
• 36:00
  his head in the beginning of the fight. Fucked his
• 36:02
  neck up for years. His neck was fucked up after
• 36:05
  that fight and still survived and eventually caught Bob Sapp
• 36:09
  in an armbar. But it was bananas. Omri Patek. Okay, yeah,
• 36:14
  there you go. Omri Patek is another guy who fought
• 36:17
  early in the UFC. So that's his coach for one.
• 36:21
  Where did he get his black belt? Just see where
• 36:24
  he got his black belt from. Just ask the question,
• 36:33
  who gave Minotauro his black belt? Let me see. Okay,
• 36:44
  Ricardo De La Riva. That's his primary instructor. There you go. Okay. Yeah,
• 36:54
  he was.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: So we could... He invented the De La Riva hook.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: Probably. There's a bunch of moves that are attributed to
• 37:03
  guys that it's not quite sure whether or not they
• 37:06
  invented it, but they were really good at it, you know?
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: How much fun is that, getting somebody a De La
• 37:11
  Riva and taking them down?
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: It's fun.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: I can't finish the leg lock. I never could. I'm
• 37:15
  fucking terrible. I can't get my arms around it. I'm fucking...
• 37:19
  My shoulders are fucked up.
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: Leg locks are scary.
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: I don't like all of that shit. You fuck them up.
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: You twist the wrong way. You turn the wrong way.
• 37:26
  You hear things pop. Scary.
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: You still training? No.
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: No more? No, I haven't over a year.
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: I haven't done any rolling. I thought you had a
• 37:34
  guy coming in with you.
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: I was for a while. I've got a knee problem.
• 37:37
  It's much better now. I've been really working on it
• 37:40
  over the last six months, but it kept swelling after
• 37:43
  a while. The thing is it would get better, and
• 37:46
  it would feel pretty good, and then I'd hurt it again.
• 37:48
  I hurt it. Like a year ago hunting, I twisted
• 37:52
  it hunting. And then I've also heard it like hit
• 37:56
  in the back too. Like sometimes I just start wailing.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: On the back. You go off and you forget.
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: You forget.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: It's just the next day it's sore as fuck. It's
• 38:05
  like I don't have meniscus on one part of my knee.
• 38:07
  So I have to make sure that it doesn't get arthritic.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: Because like I don't have to tell you. Like once
• 38:13
  your knee gets bad, it's a real problem.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: It's a problem.
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: And so you got to like– Walk that edge between
• 38:19
  when you don't have cartilage or you don't have meniscus
• 38:21
  and your cartilage is getting bone on bone like that.
• 38:23
  Like you got to be careful. You got to be careful.
• 38:26
  They're getting real close to fixing shit. Real close. They're
• 38:30
  injecting like different kinds of gels in people's knees now
• 38:33
  that replace the meniscus. And they're also doing some new
• 38:37
  stem cell therapy where they go into the bone itself
• 38:39
  and it regenerates cartilage.
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: That might be better. But that gel, they always work
• 38:43
  you with that gel.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: I think it's a new one, Joey. It's like a–
• 38:47
  they call it a biological matrix.
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: You need to fucking get like a– you need to
• 38:51
  get like insurance approval and all that. Yeah, I did it.
• 38:55
  That's just– all those things. It's like when you see
• 38:58
  an ad for somebody. Do you have problems sleeping? Buy
• 39:01
  this mouthpiece for $ 29. 99.
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: I don't think you got what they have now because
• 39:07
  this is just released in Germany. This is brand new.
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: But this gel, like I'm just saying to you, the
• 39:12
  gel– I have friends with knee problems. And they tell
• 39:16
  me what they go through. And they go to different doctors.
• 39:19
  And it's the same fucking, we got cortisol for you.
• 39:23
  We got the gel. We're not going to do the
• 39:25
  PRP and we don't do stem cell. So you, Joe, regular.
• 39:30
  you don't do no reading. This is what happened to
• 39:31
  me with the fucking why I did this surgery in
• 39:34
  the first place. You had moved here, and I didn't
• 39:37
  know about ways to well. If not, I would have
• 39:39
  never cut this knee the first time. Never. Never. I
• 39:43
  didn't read up on it because... When my wife was pregnant,
• 39:47
  I read up on all that shit. And I didn't
• 39:50
  want to have the baby no more. Because it said
• 39:52
  once you're over 43, you'll die if you're given birth. Like,
• 39:55
  if you're not ready when you get older as a woman.
• 39:58
  You know, now women are having kids in their 50s
• 40:00
  and fucking 55s. But a woman has to be, she
• 40:03
  has like a short window. And they have a lot
• 40:06
  of things that could go wrong with the pregnancy. When
• 40:09
  I read that, I got nervous for my wife. I'm like,
• 40:11
  she's going to die on the fucking table. And I'm
• 40:13
  stuck raising a girl. I don't know how to fucking
• 40:15
  raise a girl. What am I gonna do here? So
• 40:17
  I didn't really, I researched it a little bit. After
• 40:21
  I got the knee, after I went and I saw
• 40:23
  the fucking, the chisel and the fucking mallet on the table,
• 40:27
  I go, we gotta look into this when I get
• 40:28
  out of here. Like this is fucking insane. I would
• 40:31
  have never done the redo knee. I would have waited,
• 40:35
  shot it with stem cell, BPC'd it. At that time,
• 40:38
  I was still a little fearful of needles. So I
• 40:41
  was like, ah, BPC, everything is you got to shoot it.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: You're fearful of needles but not of a knee replacement.
• 40:47
  That's hilarious.
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: No, I'm fine. It took four stays in the hospital
• 40:51
  last year to fucking, like, go. One day they had
• 40:54
  to come in and take blood out of me every
• 40:56
  20 minutes for three hours.
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: Why?
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: It's that type of test. They shoot you with something
• 41:01
  to see how you react to it. Wow. And, dog,
• 41:04
  I didn't faint one time. I don't faint no more. Like,
• 41:06
  last time I wazed too well. I went in there
• 41:08
  hungover on those tequilas from... the mothership, drinking that round
• 41:12
  white juice and shit. I went in there with no breakfast. Like,
• 41:15
  we need to take blood out within minutes. I'm pale.
• 41:19
  I'm sweating profusely. They got to put ice on my
• 41:21
  back and on my neck and shit. And when I
• 41:24
  did the, when they turned the switch off on your leg,
• 41:27
  what's that? When you do that little, before surgery, when
• 41:31
  I first hurt the knee, they said, we're not going
• 41:34
  to give you pain medication, but if you're really hurting
• 41:35
  that bad, come on down here and we'll give you
• 41:37
  a nerve block.
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, they give you a nerve block.
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: Joe Rogan. Holy shit.
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: Who did that? Where'd they do that?
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: Because the place where I went for surgery, the first time,
• 41:45
  they're shit.
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: Uh-huh.
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: This place is specialized in all that stuff. So they
• 41:50
  have their own therapy. They have their own, like, the surgeons.
• 41:55
  And then they have a pain department that they talk
• 41:58
  to you. And they go, listen, you can take this.
• 42:00
  You want it? We'll give it to you. But let's
• 42:02
  do this. Let's try it with this. They don't want you.
• 42:04
  You know, and I understand it. People lose their minds
• 42:07
  on those fucking things. So I did the nerve block first, Joe.
• 42:11
  Holy fuck. Holy fuck. And when I went to the
• 42:15
  doctor about a month ago, the girl was like, I
• 42:18
  was there that day. I go, when I fainted, she goes,
• 42:19
  you didn't faint, but you sure came close. She goes,
• 42:22
  you lost all the color in your face. It's crazy, Joey.
• 42:26
  Had to drink water. And then the epidural block. You
• 42:30
  ever do one of those? No.
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: Well, no, I did when I got my knee surgery.
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they always knee surgery you. I thought they put
• 42:35
  you out for those.
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: They did most of the time. But my first ACL,
• 42:40
  I asked if I could watch. And he said, you
• 42:43
  don't want to watch it? I go, no, I do.
• 42:45
  I don't want to get this done once. I want
• 42:47
  to see it. Can I watch it?
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: Where did you see it? They shot it in your spine.
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: Well, they shot it in my spine.
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: And so you don't feel anything in your legs. And
• 42:55
  I watched him open my knee up and put it
• 42:57
  together again.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: Fuck you, Joe. The epidural block is one of the worst.
• 43:05
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't want to do this once. I
• 43:07
  didn't know that I was going to have another ACL
• 43:09
  surgery eight years later.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: So you didn't get put out for your surgery?
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: No, not the first one. The second one I did.
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: That's insane, Joe. That's fucking insane. I love you like
• 43:19
  you're Zombo and shit.
• 43:21
  Speaker 2: I wanted to watch.
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: No, I want to watch a lot of it.
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: I want to see what it looks like because it's
• 43:24
  kind of crazy. They're going to take your knee, take
• 43:26
  a slice out of your patella tendon along with a
• 43:28
  chunk of bone. A chunk of bone for your kneecap
• 43:31
  and then they screw it back in place. I'm like,
• 43:33
  this is crazy.
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: I want to watch.
• 43:36
  Speaker 2: Held up. Still good. The real problem was the meniscus.
• 43:40
  So they didn't even take the meniscus out then. They
• 43:43
  just stitched it up. There was a tear in the meniscus,
• 43:46
  but it wasn't too bad and he thought it could heal.
• 43:49
  You know, because I was in my 20s. I was
• 43:51
  like 23, I think. 22. And then over time, it
• 43:55
  just got wore out.
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: That....
• 43:59
  Speaker 2: Tear became a bucket handle tear and then it would
• 44:01
  lock so it would pull the meniscus would pull up
• 44:05
  and like lock in place it was fucking insanely painful
• 44:10
  and i was like this keeps happening it happened a
• 44:12
  couple of times it was like it happened in jujitsu
• 44:14
  class and eddie bravo had to take me to the
• 44:16
  doctor so eddie bravo had to drive my nsx we
• 44:19
  drove straight to the doctor and you know they tell
• 44:23
  me i need to get my meniscus removed i'm like
• 44:25
  okay And then he told me I need to stop
• 44:27
  doing martial arts. I was like, okay, that's cute.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: That's the first thing they'll tell you. Yeah.
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: You got to stop doing martial arts.
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: You play everything. No martial arts, no this, no that.
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: 30 years later, fuck you.
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: Let me get one of those Zins. Yeah, sure. The
• 44:40
  medium ones. What are these?
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: These are Alps. That's Tucker Carlson's one. Those are good.
• 44:45
  It's six milligrams. These are threes. This is athletic nicotine.
• 44:50
  That's threes. I like those. They don't make you jittery.
• 44:54
  Those take a hell of a hit. Tucker likes them strong.
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: I like them, but they fucking– I always swallow them
• 44:59
  by mistake. I see them shitting pouches and shit. They
• 45:04
  have focus ones?
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's these, ultras.
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I do the ultras.
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: I don't have them in this room anymore.
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: I was doing those after I had the surgery.
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: Those are great.
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they are pretty good.
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: There's a bunch of really good things for your focus.
• 45:16
  People that think it's all bullshit, like that nootropics are bullshit,
• 45:20
  you're allowed to think whatever you want. But trust me,
• 45:22
  from someone who uses his brain for a living– There's
• 45:25
  a difference between taking nootropics and not taking them. It's
• 45:29
  not going to make you smarter, but it will make
• 45:30
  your brain function at a better level. There's a bunch
• 45:33
  of shit that works like that. Like, you know, those
• 45:36
  ketone drinks, like ketone IQ, that helps a lot.
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: Really?
• 45:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Your brain uses ketones. Your brain uses ketones for focus.
• 45:43
  That's why people that take ketogenic diets and go on
• 45:45
  carnivore diet, they say it gives them like more mental clarity.
• 45:48
  You have more focus.
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: It's fact.
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: You're like. I feel different when I'm eating like clean.
• 45:54
  If I'm eating like carnivore, just eggs and steak, my
• 45:57
  brain works better, 100%. It's just not processing the carbs
• 46:01
  and all the fog that comes with that. Not that
• 46:03
  carbs are bad for you. But when you take this stuff,
• 46:07
  this stuff is the shit. This is my friend Derek's
• 46:09
  Gorilla Mind. This is a nootropic drink. It's like an
• 46:13
  energy drink.
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: No.
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: It's got some caffeine in it. It's got a good
• 46:16
  amount of caffeine. But it's got a bunch of nootropics.
• 46:19
  So there's a bunch of like brain vitamins in there.
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: You know anything about me?
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not selling this. This is my friends.
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: You know that I have a great memory of dates,
• 46:28
  and I can take you to different situations.
• 46:30
  Speaker 2: Stories.
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: I don't know what happened in the last three years.
• 46:35
  How come? If I talk to you on a Monday,
• 46:36
  which I usually do, you call me Mondays on the
• 46:39
  way home at 6. Whatever we talked about by Thursday,
• 46:45
  I don't remember. You'll say, call me back. When you
• 46:48
  find out, I'll fucking forget now. Like, just little things.
• 46:52
  Speaker 2: This is recent? This is the last few years?
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: Last few years, I could see. You know, you're 60.
• 46:57
  A lot of shit changes. Yeah. You know, it's really weird, Joe.
• 47:01
  I need eight now. I need eight. Sorry. I need eight.
• 47:05
  Eight what? Hours of sleep.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: Eight.
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: Solid. I got the whoop. I need it.
• 47:10
  Speaker 2: Makes a difference.
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: Six and a half? Don't cut it. Done. Yeah. Done.
• 47:14
  I need eight now, and don't get me started on
• 47:16
  an hour nap. Well, an hour 15 nap at 2
• 47:18
  or 3 o'clock in the afternoon. If I get up
• 47:20
  in the morning, I get up at 6. So I
• 47:23
  put her on the bus. I start smoking weed at 9.
• 47:25
  I'm at a gym. I'm doing something, boxing, PT, you know.
• 47:29
  So by fucking 2 o'clock, dog, there's days I walk in.
• 47:34
  There ain't no stopping. There ain't no pissing. I go
• 47:37
  right to the bed, put the mask on, and go
• 47:39
  right to sleep. Just like that. I mean, there's no thought.
• 47:43
  There's no stop it. What is that, Monopoly? Stop it,
• 47:47
  go and get 200? There ain't none of that. I
• 47:50
  come in, I drop my bag, I pee, and I
• 47:52
  walk right upstairs right to the bed. I move the
• 47:54
  cat over, get the fuck over, and I fucking put
• 47:58
  that mask on.
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: Does the cat cuddle with you while you're sleeping?
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: Oh, please. And he goes under the blanket. She goes
• 48:02
  under the blanket with me, too.
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: So it's perfect.
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: That's funny. But, dog, it's not no more. I'm going
• 48:08
  to fly out early no more. Fuck you. Yeah.
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: You need a solid amount of sleep. As you get older,
• 48:16
  it's even more important. You know what else is really important? Creatine.
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: I take 10 milligrams twice a day. Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful.
• 48:23
  Speaker 2: That's phenomenal for your memory. And that's a really good
• 48:26
  nootropic as well.
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: I don't like the gummies. You had some gummies on you.
• 48:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, those are good.
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: I like them. My neighbor gave them to me that
• 48:32
  you had them.
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: I prefer to just open it up and pour it
• 48:35
  in my mouth. And then drink water.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, me too. I like the powder too.
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I put like the 10 milligrams in my mouth
• 48:41
  and I just drink water.
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: You don't put it on your food, do you? No. No,
• 48:44
  I just drink it. I put it on the smoothie
• 48:46
  from time to time. I like the raspberries with coconut water.
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: I feel like the best way to make sure that
• 48:51
  I'm getting all 10 milligrams is to just pour it
• 48:54
  in my mouth and then drink water with it. Because
• 48:57
  otherwise it's in the glass. You got to rinse the
• 48:59
  glass and get more of it in. You know, you're
• 49:01
  giving yourself an exact dose. Just put it in your mouth.
• 49:03
  Dry scoop it. So I just dry scoop it in
• 49:05
  my mouth and pour the water in there. That's how
• 49:08
  I do it most of the time. What the gummies
• 49:09
  are really good for is if you forget and they're
• 49:11
  just laying around, you just eat a couple of gummies.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: You know? I don't know how many milligrams are in those, right?
• 49:17
  It says it on them.
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: I think two gummies is five milligrams. I think that's
• 49:22
  what it is.
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: I also got turned on to a creatine company that
• 49:26
  has a creatine precursor. Is that any good?
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: Creatine? A precursor?
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: Creatine precursor.
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: I don't know what that is.
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: Your own body creates creatine on its own. This helps
• 49:35
  the body.
• 49:37
  I think it's called a precursor. I don't fucking know.
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: Anything I say, just right off with a fucking, you
• 49:43
  know what I'm saying? I know it because I'm saying
• 49:45
  it wrong like Voltron. I don't fucking know, guys.
• 49:47
  Speaker 2: I'm sure there's something. I mean, there's always a bunch.
• 49:50
  I mean, if you think about how many supplements are
• 49:53
  out there, good Lord, there's so many supplements. And not
• 49:57
  all of them are good, but a lot of them
• 49:58
  are really good. Here's another one that's really good for
• 50:00
  working out, beta-alanine. You ever take that?
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: No. Phenomenal. Look, I take everything else.
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: It makes you tingle, though. It makes your skin.
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: Almost like itch. You ever take iodine? No.
• 50:11
  Speaker 2: Iodine?
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah. There's a pill or something. You take iodine to
• 50:14
  help you.
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: You're supposed to do that if you get radiation poisoning.
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: Listen, when the first piss test came out, they said
• 50:19
  you would take iodine.
• 50:21
  Speaker 2: Did you put Clorox in your dick?
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: I put Clorox in my dick afterward because the iodine
• 50:26
  obviously didn't fucking work, okay?
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: Can you imagine when they read you're pissed through the
• 50:32
  fucking test machine? They'd be like, what? What is this?
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: Do you understand? Because this isn't piss. Do you understand? Like,
• 50:39
  piss times. Every morning I go out and take my
• 50:41
  cup of coffee and I sit outside. I thank God,
• 50:44
  you know, the whole fucking bullshit story. And then it
• 50:47
  takes me somewhere. Like, after the second cup of coffee
• 50:49
  and one of these zins and a bong hit, your
• 50:52
  mind goes somewhere. And I think of chunks of my life.
• 50:55
  And I go, what the fuck was that? Like, that was, Joe,
• 51:00
  that was insanity. What about every time he used to
• 51:03
  come to my house to do the checkup? I never
• 51:06
  let him in. He came like 11 times in two years.
• 51:10
  I never let him in my house. He would know
• 51:11
  I was in the house. He would put the sheriffs
• 51:14
  to come and sit outside my house for two hours.
• 51:16
  Then they would leave. They're like, he's not home. I
• 51:20
  never let him in my house. I tortured that guy.
• 51:22
  Speaker 2: That's hilarious.
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: He could have sent me to prison. I still would
• 51:25
  have been in prison. But it was such a, like,
• 51:27
  first it was the iodine. And then you fucking, you know,
• 51:31
  you're supposed to take 20 milligrams. Yeah. I mean 200, whatever.
• 51:34
  I don't know. And my skin is burning. I'm fucking
• 51:37
  red in the face. I got itches. So I stopped
• 51:39
  with the iodine. I still came back positive. Then I
• 51:42
  went on the fucking white vinegar.
• 51:46
  Speaker 2: White vinegar.
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: White vinegar with a fucking bottle of Gatorade on a
• 51:50
  Monday morning. Not a little vinegar. Not red wine vinegar.
• 51:54
  The real vinegar that you clean your asshole with. and
• 51:58
  douchebags and all that shit. Vinegar cleans you out. Women
• 52:02
  wash their monkey with vinegar because it takes all the
• 52:05
  fucking cat piss out of them and all the shit
• 52:07
  they got in there. So they said, drink vinegar every
• 52:12
  Monday morning, bro. And it's like a process. You would
• 52:16
  get high Friday, and you would hope to beat it
• 52:18
  by Sunday, but you knew you weren't going to beat it,
• 52:20
  and they're going to call you Monday. And it's like
• 52:23
  your color is yellow, right? If they say yellow, you
• 52:26
  got to come in. So you wait till 1 o'clock,
• 52:28
  and you're like, all right. You got to call in,
• 52:30
  and all of a sudden, today, Monday, Tuesday, the 9th
• 52:34
  of June, the colors are purple, and you're like, yellow,
• 52:38
  god damn. Now I got to figure out. I got
• 52:40
  five hours. The place closes at 6, so I got
• 52:42
  to figure out how to stop this cocaine from coming up.
• 52:47
  So then we started taking Serto.
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: What's Serto?
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: Serto is what you put in, like, Jell-O. It's that
• 52:55
  thing that makes the jello jiggle with some shit. What?
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: Fucking Serto.
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: There was no internet these days. Right.
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: What is that? A brand of liquid fruit pectin, most
• 53:08
  commonly used in the kitchen as a thickening agent for
• 53:11
  homemade jams and jellies. However, it's also widely known as
• 53:15
  an internet folk remedy people use in an attempt to
• 53:17
  mask drug metabolites in urine.
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: I told you. It's a folk remedy. It's fucking bullshit.
• 53:23
  Speaker 2: Does it work?
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: No. That's why.
• 53:25
  Speaker 2: Let's find out if it works. The myth. Many online
• 53:29
  forums suggest mixing Serto with a large sports drink like
• 53:32
  Gatorade and drinking it a few hours before a drug
• 53:34
  urine test. The theory claims the fiber traps toxins in
• 53:39
  your digestive tract. Reality, health professionals and medical studies show
• 53:43
  no scientific evidence that fruit pectin can reliably clear drugs
• 53:47
  or toxins from your urine, while fiber works in the
• 53:49
  gut has no effect on what your kidneys filter into
• 53:52
  your urine. This episode is brought to you by Armra.
• 53:56
  Every week there's some new wellness hack that people swear by,
• 53:59
  and after a while you start thinking, why do we
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  and has hundreds of these specialized nutrients for gut stuff, immunity, metabolism, etc.
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• 54:33
  Speaker 1: But again, you get your advice from a guy who's
• 54:34
  done 30 fucking years. Then you forget he's been doing
• 54:37
  30 years because he made mistakes.
• 54:38
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: Not because he's a fucking genius about Serto. Exactly. You know?
• 54:42
  And then we went from Serto. And then one day
• 54:44
  I was sweating.
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: Does anything work?
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: Huh?
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: Does anything work?
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: No. Cranberry juice.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: What about that stuff that they used to sell? Remember
• 54:50
  they used to sell stuff?
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: This is 90 fucking. This is 89. They didn't sell nothing.
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: No?
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: No.
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: But do you remember there was some stuff that you
• 54:57
  could buy?
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: Am I remembering this wrong? No, no. You're saying you
• 55:01
  could buy piss now. Now it's completely different.
• 55:03
  Speaker 2: You could buy piss?
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you could buy piss online. Just get that dirty
• 55:08
  fucking XPT, whatever you go on, and you could search
• 55:11
  hidden shit all over the world.
• 55:12
  Speaker 2: So you just got to get a rubber dick and
• 55:14
  take that piss?
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: I had a guy who made a rubber dick. Normalette
• 55:19
  could not start snorting coke, so he made a contraption
• 55:22
  where he filled up his son's. pissed in a hot
• 55:25
  water bottle and did the same thing with the douche.
• 55:28
  And he took the douche on the bottom and he
• 55:29
  scotch taped it to his dick and he would piss
• 55:32
  and squeeze his chest.
• 55:35
  Speaker 2: Oh my God.
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: Then one day the thing blew up. And he was
• 55:41
  a bank robber. They sent him to jail for 30
• 55:43
  fucking years.
• 55:44
  Speaker 2: Want to hear the craziest steroid evasion story that I
• 55:47
  ever heard from piss? There was a guy who was
• 55:49
  fighting and he knew he was going to get piss
• 55:51
  test and he was just juiced to the tits. So
• 55:53
  the legend is that they inserted clean urine into his
• 55:59
  bladder through injection. So he injected clean urine into his
• 56:06
  bladder with a needle. Whether or not that's true, I
• 56:11
  have no idea. But this is what everybody, this is
• 56:13
  like early days of the UFC. Like when they first
• 56:16
  started drug testing people. I don't even think it was
• 56:19
  in the UFC that he did this. I think it
• 56:20
  was in another organization. But I don't know if it's true.
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: Think about what's going on on the other side of this.
• 56:25
  Your addiction is that high.
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: Well, these guys, when they're that juiced up, when they're
• 56:30
  that juiced up, they're not getting off of it. No, no.
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: I get it. I understand. So you understand the extremes
• 56:36
  that people do? Yeah. Could you ever shoot fucking fake piss? Like, Joey,
• 56:41
  go piss in the fucking thing. I'm going to shoot
• 56:42
  Joey's piss.
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: A guy willing to do that and trusting that guy
• 56:46
  was finding your bladder. He could shoot piss into your liver. Like,
• 56:49
  who knows what this guy even understands anatomy.
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: But these are the levels that you do. So here
• 56:53
  I am, started on work, fucking nothing works. And one
• 56:57
  day I'm at a pool. I'm like, oh, shit, when
• 56:59
  you piss in the pool, the pool cleaner cleans all this.
• 57:04
  If not, the pool would be green the next day.
• 57:06
  Speaker 2: So this is your logic?
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: I went, I took the kids, I took one of
• 57:10
  those cubes first.
• 57:11
  Speaker 2: With the crumbs?
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: Smashed it up. And then I put it on my
• 57:17
  outside of a dick because I'm uncircumcised, so I would
• 57:19
  pull the skin back. And that would fall into the
• 57:21
  fucking piss. So he told me once, something happened last time.
• 57:25
  You fucked up the machine or something like that, right?
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: Women would insert condoms filled with someone else's urine inside themselves,
• 57:32
  he said. Some athletes would inject urine into their bladders
• 57:35
  using a catheter. Oh, God, they did do that. So
• 57:38
  that's real. So maybe that's how he did it. Maybe
• 57:41
  they used a catheter. And that's how they put the fake.
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: But then there's the Wizenator.
• 57:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was the rubber dick. Wasn't there some stuff
• 57:49
  that you could buy that you would get at like
• 57:51
  a head shop and it supposedly detoxed you? No, but
• 57:54
  this is 89. But does that stuff work? Nothing's real
• 57:59
  that's ever happened.
• 58:00
  Speaker 1: Nothing's real?
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I always assumed that it wasn't real. I was like,
• 58:03
  you're selling this at a head shop? Stuff from the 90s.
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: These are some of the products. But the killer was
• 58:06
  when I used Drano.
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay. So this is all bullshit.
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: They just rob people.
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they just rob people.
• 58:11
  Speaker 2: Fetish urine. Look at that. Look at that label. Fetish urine?
• 58:16
  What the fuck does that mean? It's probably a way
• 58:18
  to sell it because you have to say what, you know.
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: So that's piss.
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: Not for human consumption or something. Oh, so that's your
• 58:24
  buying piss?
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: Oh, so that's an actual bag of piss.
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: On the right?
• 58:28
  Speaker 2: Oh, good Lord. This one's called a tinkle. It's fetish urine.
• 58:31
  So if you just want someone to piss on you,
• 58:33
  but no one's willing. You're very told that story about
• 58:38
  the guy with the gay club, the guy at the
• 58:40
  bathtub that.
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: Wanted to piss on him. Everybody was pissing on him
• 58:42
  in the tub. Yeah. And then that party shamer took
• 58:45
  me to that hotel next to the comedy store, and
• 58:47
  they were getting pissed on in there, the women. Yeah.
• 58:49
  And then I wake up Saturday. I'm feeling good about myself.
• 58:53
  And I'm on Twitter. I see Bonnie Blue. She had a,
• 58:56
  that chick is fucking, she got pissed on. Had a
• 58:59
  baby shower. In her ass. People were pissing their pussy
• 59:02
  in her ass. And I'm like, somebody's got to stop
• 59:05
  that woman.
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: She's the least of her problems.
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. A fucking baby shower. When I used
• 59:10
  the drain, although that was the best because that destroyed
• 59:13
  the machine. But the truth of the matter is.
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: When he said something happened last time.
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: Well, this is what happened. I put the drain on
• 59:23
  my dick. And I walked up to the counter. And
• 59:25
  I put it on the desk. And he asked me questions.
• 59:27
  How's it been, bub? And I'm looking at the thing,
• 59:30
  and it's starting to foam. Like this thing. And it's
• 59:34
  coming out of the bag.
• 59:35
  Speaker 2: Like a dishwasher.
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: And I'm looking at this thing going, this motherfucker better not.
• 59:40
  And what he did was he just picked it up
• 59:42
  and threw it in the bag. Like when they pick
• 59:44
  it up and test it. Sometimes you leave the top off.
• 59:47
  That was an old trick. You leave the top off,
• 59:49
  and then it spilled off.
• 59:50
  Speaker 2: Oh, no.
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: So that buys you one extra week. But the time
• 59:53
  with the Drano, it started like blah, blah, blah. It
• 59:55
  was like shaking at the thing. Like foam was coming
• 59:58
  out of the fucking sides. And I locked it up good.
• 1:00:00
  That's what happened. There was no oxygen. That motherfucker was like,
• 1:00:03
  you know, boom. So I put it in the fucking thing.
• 1:00:06
  And he called me a few days later. He's like, listen,
• 1:00:09
  I wrote up a thing. I'm taking you to court
• 1:00:10
  because you broke the machine. This cannot continue. This can't continue.
• 1:00:15
  This can't continue. This is like a fucking cat and
• 1:00:19
  mouse game. What did you put in your body? What happened?
• 1:00:24
  What the fuck is going on, Jose? Did you say, hey,
• 1:00:28
  your machine sucks.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 2: Your machine broke.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: It has nothing to do with me. No, and then
• 1:00:33
  they put me on like this hold. They were like,
• 1:00:35
  we're not even going to piss you no more, dog.
• 1:00:36
  We're done. We can't take this mental fucking... So this
• 1:00:43
  is when you're in the probation department. Now they're going
• 1:00:45
  to throw me back in community corrections because they'll put
• 1:00:48
  you in for 90 days and all that. I met
• 1:00:50
  this fucking guy. For three months we spoke like nothing,
• 1:00:55
  like gentlemen. I would talk to him, saw him once
• 1:00:57
  a week. And one day I said, what do you do?
• 1:01:00
  And he goes, I'm a district attorney in Boulder, Bill Wise.
• 1:01:04
  I need a beef. I need a problem. I'm on
• 1:01:06
  this probation. They won't leave me alone. What do I
• 1:01:09
  do to get off? He goes, just have your attorney
• 1:01:11
  drop a statement, and I'll sign it and get you
• 1:01:14
  off probation. And that was it. Just a guy I
• 1:01:17
  met on the street, Bill Wise. And then he got
• 1:01:19
  fired after the JonBenet Ramsey thing. He was there doing
• 1:01:23
  the whole JonBenet Ramsey thing, and everybody got fucking fired,
• 1:01:25
  I guess. I don't know. Bill Wise was a great dude, man.
• 1:01:27
  He was good to me. And I told him. I
• 1:01:29
  asked him what I did. I told him the truth.
• 1:01:31
  And he goes, did you learn from the mistake? Yeah.
• 1:01:33
  I'm here working, aren't I? He goes, OK. Pass it over,
• 1:01:37
  and I'll sign it. I'm like, OK. How fucking lucky
• 1:01:40
  am I? I'm done. I'm done. I was done. Started
• 1:01:44
  in 87. It was all the way to 91. For
• 1:01:46
  a year, I was fucking them up with the Pete thing.
• 1:01:50
  Then they put me back in the halfway house. And
• 1:01:52
  that was even worse. I was out of control in there.
• 1:01:56
  There was freaks in there. There's fucking everything in there.
• 1:01:58
  Freaky girls. I was stealing the air conditioner out of
• 1:02:01
  the conference room and putting it in my room. They
• 1:02:04
  couldn't handle me there either. They were like, dog, you
• 1:02:07
  can just go home.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 2: We're not going to fuck with you no more.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 1: And that's what you do. You just wear somebody ragging.
• 1:02:13
  They'll let you go eventually. They'll just say, you know what, man,
• 1:02:16
  it ain't worth it. You're never going to stop. You're
• 1:02:19
  never going to stop. And then a year later, I
• 1:02:21
  had like an affair with one time. I had an
• 1:02:23
  affair with like the chick that worked in that office.
• 1:02:26
  She's the one that had the one leg. They delivered
• 1:02:29
  Chinese food to her. It never stopped. And you think
• 1:02:35
  of those chunks in your life and go, what the
• 1:02:37
  fuck was going on? Yeah, you were out of control. Like,
• 1:02:41
  it's 31 years, and I still won't get back to
• 1:02:43
  Boulder because of the shame I endured. Seriously. Like, I
• 1:02:47
  won't go. Everybody goes, why don't you go back to Boulder?
• 1:02:49
  Because I'm ashamed that that was such a beautiful city.
• 1:02:52
  And I treated it like it was Newark. Right, right. Like,
• 1:02:55
  I did what I wanted. I would go to Kmart,
• 1:02:57
  hang out outside of fucking the lawnmower department. and people
• 1:03:01
  would come out with new lawnmowers, and the receipt would
• 1:03:03
  fly off. I'd get that receipt and go to a
• 1:03:06
  lawnmower and get that lawnmower for $ 400 and walk it up.
• 1:03:09
  I'd go, my mother bought me this. I don't want
• 1:03:10
  it no more. And I'd give them the receipt, and
• 1:03:12
  they'd give me $ 400 cash plus tax. Who does that?
• 1:03:16
  That fucking Toys R Us? I took that thing down
• 1:03:18
  by myself with those Jeffrey Bucks. I took them down.
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 2: What's a Jeffrey Buck?
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: It's like when you bring a stolen computer in there,
• 1:03:26
  and they won't give you cash. They'll give you Jeffrey Bucks.
• 1:03:29
  So you have to spend it in the fucking store.
• 1:03:31
  You know what I mean? I had a million dollars
• 1:03:33
  in Jeffrey Bucks at one time. I was buying bicycles
• 1:03:35
  and fucking. It's just, it just, I was an animal.
• 1:03:40
  And I feel really guilty about it today. I'm thinking
• 1:03:43
  of booking the Fox Theater in Boulder and doing like,
• 1:03:45
  because Lodizio's opening back up, my Italian joint. So they
• 1:03:49
  called and they said, we're opening back up. And I'm like,
• 1:03:51
  I'm thinking of doing Boulder, like Fox Theater. Just take
• 1:03:54
  my lumps, apologize. donate to something there and just call
• 1:03:58
  it a fucking night because I still feel guilty, man.
• 1:04:00
  I'm old, but now I feel guilty about the damage.
• 1:04:03
  I put Boulder through fucking eight. I mean, I got
• 1:04:05
  chased through the mall by security and I'm throwing fucking
• 1:04:08
  CDs at them. I remember the Denver Broncos were playing
• 1:04:12
  Cleveland in 87. Those big playoff games. You remember those, Jamie?
• 1:04:16
  I'm at the mall one day and everybody's in the
• 1:04:17
  hallway looking at TVs. I'm like, who's minding the stores?
• 1:04:21
  I went into Radio Shack and I popped out the
• 1:04:23
  fucking CD player, brand new one, and just put the
• 1:04:25
  quarter on it and walked out like nothing. Who does that, dog?
• 1:04:28
  That's animal. I'm ashamed to admit this shit, but it
• 1:04:32
  was like you said when you first went to Boulder
• 1:04:34
  the first time. You're like, this must have been a
• 1:04:37
  fucking grocery store for Joey Diaz.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 2: That's exactly what I said when I went there. It was.
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: It was a shame.
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 2: Everybody's so, they're so like peaceful and sweet.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: I brought chaos.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 1: Chaos. And it was too much. When I was in
• 1:04:53
  the prison, I broke chaos. And I had my cell open.
• 1:04:55
  I did what I wanted. It was just too much.
• 1:04:58
  And to this day, New York, you can shit like
• 1:05:01
  that because that's what New York is about. I was
• 1:05:03
  a fucking piece of shit in New York, too. But
• 1:05:05
  I don't feel guilty about that. I still walk around
• 1:05:07
  the city now.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: But so many pieces of shit in New York were
• 1:05:10
  unique in Boulder.
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: It was unique. But in Boulder, they didn't have anything
• 1:05:12
  like me. I was shaking down people. Some guy kept
• 1:05:16
  telling me, I saw you on A & E. Remember
• 1:05:19
  in the 90s and 80s, A & E was a
• 1:05:21
  mafia channel. They talked, Bill whatever, talked about A & E,
• 1:05:25
  the Corleone family. And this guy saw me one day.
• 1:05:27
  He's like, hey, you're the guy that's in the witness
• 1:05:30
  relocation plan. This is 89. This is way before Sammy
• 1:05:35
  and all those guys went in. This guy's telling me,
• 1:05:39
  you're a witness relocated guy, a little Italian guy. I
• 1:05:42
  saw you on A & E. You're George the Animal
• 1:05:45
  something from Boston. I'm like, dog, that's not me. Stop
• 1:05:49
  saying that. I already got problems in fucking Boulder. You're
• 1:05:51
  telling people that I'm a witness relocated mafia guy. He
• 1:05:55
  pissed me off so much, finally I just kicked this
• 1:05:57
  fucking door down here like one of those Italian knick-knack stores.
• 1:06:00
  I went in there and I said, dog, since I'm
• 1:06:02
  George the Animal, I am. You're going to give me
• 1:06:04
  $ 200 a week. Bro, he started giving me $ 200 a
• 1:06:07
  week for like three weeks. Then he called a sit-down
• 1:06:09
  with Antonio Lodizio. And Antonio's like, yeah, you got to
• 1:06:12
  keep paying him. And the guy closed up shop like
• 1:06:14
  three weeks later and I never saw him again. Little
• 1:06:17
  Italian guy would always kick his shoes up. Dog, that's
• 1:06:20
  crazy shit. I was snorting coke at an ATM in Boulder.
• 1:06:25
  Next to Murphy's, there's an ATM you can walk into
• 1:06:27
  with the door. I would go in there with a
• 1:06:28
  case of beer at night and just put coke on
• 1:06:30
  the metal. People would come and go ahead. Can't take
• 1:06:37
  this shit back. But it was done and I can't
• 1:06:39
  undo it, you know.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 2: But it bothers you now?
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: Well, does it bother you or does it just make
• 1:06:45
  you confused? Listen, nobody remembers half this shit I'm saying.
• 1:06:49
  Nobody will remember this shit. People are on, they moved
• 1:06:52
  on with their lives. If they saw me now, they'd go, hey,
• 1:06:54
  that's the guy that kidnapped the guy. No, you know,
• 1:06:57
  my name was in the paper. My picture wasn't. They
• 1:06:59
  didn't have a picture of me, but everything else was
• 1:07:01
  in the fucking paper. It's a guilt. It's a weird
• 1:07:04
  fucking guilt, man, that I could have done so much
• 1:07:07
  better there if I would have played my cards right.
• 1:07:09
  I could have graduated college as a fucking astronaut because
• 1:07:12
  they were going to give me everything just because I
• 1:07:14
  was Cuban. They had no Spanish people at that college.
• 1:07:17
  They had only like eight blacks that played football, so
• 1:07:19
  they were doing anything to get Latinos. I would have
• 1:07:22
  been a fucking astronaut with a GED.
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but we would have missed this, Joey. Yeah, but
• 1:07:28
  it's good that it turned out this way.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 1: Let me ask you something. If you wouldn't have gotten
• 1:07:31
  into this fucking thing, what would you think you'd be
• 1:07:34
  doing now?
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 2: If I hadn't gotten into which one?
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 1: This thing that we're doing. Stand-up comedy. No. Stand-up comedy
• 1:07:40
  opened up everything else.
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 2: What would I be doing? I don't know, man.
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 2: I probably would have fought again.
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: Would you be a chef? Would you be... I mean,
• 1:07:48
  I can pin you as a chef. You love to cook.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I do love to cook.
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 1: A chef? A mason?
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 2: I would have found something that I enjoyed doing.
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: What?
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I would have figured it out.
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 1: What's your second love?
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 2: The real problem would be if I had a kid
• 1:08:00
  real young. I know a bunch of my friends got
• 1:08:05
  married and had kids when they were like 22, 23.
• 1:08:07
  There's nothing wrong with that. But then that really limits
• 1:08:11
  your ability to just go for it because you have
• 1:08:14
  mouths to feed. That's a different animal. I think about
• 1:08:17
  the early days of stand-up when I was 21. And
• 1:08:20
  how I had zero money. I mean zero. I had
• 1:08:23
  zero money. I barely could eat. I remember I had
• 1:08:26
  a big fucking jar of pennies and nickels and dimes
• 1:08:30
  and shit. And I remember rolling it all up so
• 1:08:33
  I could go get a sandwich. Like I had no money.
• 1:08:36
  And so I could imagine like if I was trying
• 1:08:39
  to do that, I said, well, I'm just going to
• 1:08:41
  live like this for a couple of years. And I
• 1:08:43
  think if I work hard enough, I could eventually start
• 1:08:46
  making money doing stand-up. And if I keep getting better,
• 1:08:48
  maybe I could be a professional.
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 1: That was the idea.
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 2: It was never like have a career. But if I
• 1:08:53
  had a kid and I had a wife, there's no
• 1:08:56
  way I would have done it. There's no way I
• 1:08:58
  would have gotten a job. And that's where a lot
• 1:09:01
  of people get into. Or maybe you think it's going
• 1:09:05
  to be a good investment to get a house, which
• 1:09:07
  it is. But now you've got a mortgage. So you've
• 1:09:09
  got a mortgage. You can't just fucking lose everything. I
• 1:09:12
  got my car repossessed. I was broke, man. I was broke.
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: Bro, I used to have to hide my car in
• 1:09:17
  a garage so they wouldn't repossess it. Shit.
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, it was 100% check to check. Never
• 1:09:24
  had any money in the bank.
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: I don't know if this ever happens to you, but
• 1:09:27
  it happens to me a lot now. This is why
• 1:09:30
  I started this grateful shit, because there are days I
• 1:09:33
  pull up to my house. I don't know who lives there. Yeah.
• 1:09:38
  I go, who lives here? Is it me?
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 2: I know. It doesn't feel real.
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: And then you ask, you say to yourself, this is
• 1:09:46
  the most important thing. For people listening, I want you
• 1:09:48
  to listen to this. If you have a dream or
• 1:09:49
  a goal, you go, I got to pay for that
• 1:09:52
  with comedy, which I always thought I was just going
• 1:09:55
  to make $ 100 a set. And I would have been
• 1:09:57
  fine with that if nobody would have ever bothered me
• 1:10:00
  in my life. I would have been fine with $ 100
• 1:10:02
  a set, getting in my beat-up car and doing that,
• 1:10:06
  getting your dick sucked, getting STDs. I would have done
• 1:10:09
  all that shit, you know? That's what it is. So
• 1:10:13
  when you look at your house, whether it costs $ 40, 000
• 1:10:16
  or $ 80 million and go, I paid for this doing
• 1:10:19
  $ 15 sets at the Comedy Store. Yeah. When you got
• 1:10:24
  into this, you just wanted to survive. Never mind the
• 1:10:28
  fucking house and cars. You never dreamed that this would
• 1:10:31
  stand up. I know I didn't.
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 2: I never dreamed of this with anything.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 1: No.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 2: I never thought I would be a person who had money.
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 1: I dreamed of being a funny person and to– be
• 1:10:42
  funny enough to make a living and stand up. Yeah.
• 1:10:44
  I never saw this part of it. So when I
• 1:10:46
  pull up in my house and I go, that was
• 1:10:48
  paid with $ 20 sets. $ 25 here, $ 15 here, $ 100 here. Yeah,
• 1:10:53
  that adds up. I'm not saying that, but that was
• 1:10:56
  paid by a dream. Yeah. Not a job, not something
• 1:10:59
  my family did. I wasn't forced into like raising lemons
• 1:11:03
  or whatever the fuck people do that are decent, you know,
• 1:11:05
  growing lemons. You know, seriously, we were born into this.
• 1:11:09
  This is something we got into and said, I just
• 1:11:12
  want to survive. I just want to be able to
• 1:11:15
  eat three meals and get enough gas to go to
• 1:11:17
  the next thing. Forget money in the bank. Forget it.
• 1:11:20
  It's overrated. I would never even open up a bank.
• 1:11:23
  I didn't open up a bank until I was 40
• 1:11:25
  years old. I just ran on whatever the fuck. I
• 1:11:28
  would open and put 20 in and write a bounce
• 1:11:30
  check and fucking move on and pray that nobody caught you.
• 1:11:34
  And people have no idea what that feeling is like.
• 1:11:37
  I get in my car and I go, holy shit.
• 1:11:41
  One of those bungee cords? Oh, yeah, a bungee cord.
• 1:11:43
  So I had a car when I first did comedy.
• 1:11:45
  I had to close the door with a bungee cord
• 1:11:48
  across my thing. It was like my combination seatbelt because
• 1:11:50
  if I took a fucking right turn, the door would open.
• 1:11:54
  You know, the door would just wing open. Now I'm
• 1:11:56
  in a car that's fucking I paid for with comedy,
• 1:12:00
  not drugs.
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 2: A nice one.
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 1: Not anything. No, whether it's nice or not, you paid
• 1:12:04
  for this without nobody's interference with somebody, with something that
• 1:12:08
  somebody told you you'd never be good at. You'd never
• 1:12:12
  be good at it. Somebody at least said it to
• 1:12:13
  you one time. Joe, come on, man. Comedy? You're never
• 1:12:16
  going to. What do you think? You're going to be
• 1:12:18
  on HBO with fucking Richard Pryor and George Carlin? You laugh,
• 1:12:21
  but you're like, they're kind of right. They were fucking wrong.
• 1:12:23
  We didn't know it. We just didn't fucking know it.
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 2: Well, it's like telling someone, I'm going to run 200 miles.
• 1:12:28
  They're like, no, you're not. You can't even run around
• 1:12:31
  the block. Like, no, one day I'm going to run
• 1:12:33
  200 miles. Like, no, you're not. You're not going to
• 1:12:35
  run 200 miles. And most of the time, they're right.
• 1:12:39
  But if you're one of those motherfuckers... It's just like
• 1:12:42
  it might take me 10 years to develop the endurance
• 1:12:44
  to run 200 miles. But if I start right now,
• 1:12:48
  next month I'm going to be able to run five miles.
• 1:12:52
  In six months I'll be able to run 10 miles.
• 1:12:54
  Then I'm going to keep going.
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 1: But then you quit before the miracle happens. A lot
• 1:12:58
  of people do. Somewhere along the line.
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: How many people do we know that quit? How many
• 1:13:01
  people do we know that were really talented, that were
• 1:13:03
  really funny?
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: And just disappeared. And now you see them on Facebook.
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 2: I don't want to shame anybody, but there's a few guys,
• 1:13:08
  and there's this one guy at the early days of
• 1:13:10
  the comedy store that I really tried to help. I
• 1:13:12
  connected him to my manager, and I was like, this
• 1:13:14
  guy's legit. I'm like, you're funny, dude. Like, you're good.
• 1:13:18
  If you just fucking stay. And then had a bunch
• 1:13:20
  of personal problems, had a kid. I think he had
• 1:13:24
  some legal issues.
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 1: Damn.
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 2: Damn. But that guy, I'm like, I'll tell you later
• 1:13:29
  who it was.
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 1: No, I know who it was.
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. But I was like, that motherfucker was funny.
• 1:13:33
  He was funny.
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 1: Way funnier than I was.
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 2: He was great.
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: And he was a.
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 2: Fun dude to be around. He was a cool dude.
• 1:13:39
  I was like, he's going to make it.
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 1: There was people I looked at and I go, they're
• 1:13:42
  way funnier than I am. Holy fuck. Holy fuck.
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 2: We were both like the same age too. We were
• 1:13:48
  like 27 when I first met him. And I connected
• 1:13:52
  with my manager and he was like, nobody ever did
• 1:13:55
  anything like that for me before. Nobody tries to help me.
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 1: Nobody?
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 2: I was like, listen, man, you'll do it too now.
• 1:14:02
  You'll make it, and then you'll do it too. Well,
• 1:14:04
  I'll do it. It helps, and it doesn't hurt. It
• 1:14:08
  doesn't hurt you at all to help somebody, but it
• 1:14:10
  helps them, and it helps you. It helps you feel better.
• 1:14:13
  You feel better that you're helping someone. I always say
• 1:14:16
  that being generous is kind of selfish in a way
• 1:14:19
  because you feel better too. Like when I'm generous, I
• 1:14:22
  feel better.
• 1:14:22
  Speaker 1: I do. Yeah.
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we all do. And when we're kind and when
• 1:14:26
  we try to help people, you feel better. It's good
• 1:14:28
  for you. It's good for everybody. And it's like that's
• 1:14:31
  a message that the world needs to hear. Like you
• 1:14:34
  could be good to people. And if you're good to
• 1:14:37
  people and you're nice to people, it will help you too.
• 1:14:40
  And if you find someone who's got something and you're
• 1:14:43
  doing a thing, like you're doing a thing, and there's
• 1:14:45
  someone who's got a spark, there's a little talent, help them.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 1: Help those people.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 2: Give them advice. Give them a push. Let them open
• 1:14:53
  for you. Watch their set. Give them some feedback. Help them.
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 1: We're not in the comedy business, Joe. I've never been
• 1:15:02
  in the comedy business. I don't know what anybody's talking about.
• 1:15:05
  We're in the karma business. I'm in the karma business.
• 1:15:09
  I am not in the karma business. My goal every
• 1:15:11
  day is to make somebody's day. One person. A woman
• 1:15:15
  at a supermarket, you're looking fucking bad as a motherfucker today. Oh,
• 1:15:18
  stop it, Joey. Yeah, that. I just made her a
• 1:15:21
  fucking day. Her husband sees her every day and never
• 1:15:23
  tells her she's banging. And I'm going up to this lady,
• 1:15:26
  I don't even know, and I'm like, damn, if I
• 1:15:28
  was 20 years younger. You know, they're older than me,
• 1:15:31
  like they're 68. That's my thing every day, just make
• 1:15:34
  somebody's day. One person. You can't save the world, but
• 1:15:38
  one day a gesture, a handshake, a couple dollars is
• 1:15:42
  not going to set you back.
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 2: That is kind of what you– if you're doing a
• 1:15:46
  thing or you're doing something that people enjoy, like think
• 1:15:49
  about like your sets. Like think about how many people
• 1:15:52
  have gone to see you and you changed their night.
• 1:15:55
  Gone to see you. Like how many nights at the
• 1:15:57
  store people come in. You want to see a show? Yeah,
• 1:15:59
  let's go see a show. You go on stage and
• 1:16:01
  rock that fucking place. They leave. They're holding their side
• 1:16:04
  like– and they go out and get something to eat afterwards.
• 1:16:06
  They already said that fucking thing about– and they change
• 1:16:11
  people's evenings. You change their feelings. You change the way
• 1:16:15
  they feel, and you feel good because of it. It's
• 1:16:17
  like this weird exchange. The reason why we love killing,
• 1:16:20
  especially people that are really good at it, what they
• 1:16:23
  love is that they're making other people happy. That's really
• 1:16:26
  what you love.
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: That's it. I love it. You're making other.
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 2: People happy, and you feel happy because you're making it.
• 1:16:31
  And when you don't, oh, you feel terrible.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 1: I feel I do better when I look at the audience,
• 1:16:36
  and they're laughing, and I laugh with them. Once I laugh,
• 1:16:39
  you're done. Yes. You're done. Once I start laughing and giggling.
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 2: If it's real.
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 1: Parties. Yeah. No, it's real.
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 2: If you're having fun.
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 1: It's real. It's real. When I look out there and
• 1:16:49
  I see somebody that should not be laughing and they're
• 1:16:51
  laughing at something blue as shit that I said and
• 1:16:54
  I don't expect them to laugh, that's what makes me laugh.
• 1:16:57
  Or the look on their face from the shock of
• 1:16:59
  you saying something, that's what always kicks me into this
• 1:17:03
  fucking mode. Yeah. It's beautiful. The other thing I want
• 1:17:06
  to talk about in this podcast, because I was talking
• 1:17:08
  to a friend of mine in Jersey, a stand-up. And
• 1:17:10
  this is the other thing people don't see. We're very
• 1:17:13
  blessed because we went to L.A. or wherever the fuck
• 1:17:15
  we went, and one day you're talking to somebody, and
• 1:17:19
  two weeks later, they're in fucking the biggest movie in Hollywood. Yeah.
• 1:17:25
  And it's very hard to explain to people to sit,
• 1:17:27
  believe in yourself, and just keep showing up, and that
• 1:17:32
  this happens. But since people don't see that happen in
• 1:17:37
  their world... In Jersey, what do you see? A guy
• 1:17:40
  hits the lottery, he wins a million dollars. That's their
• 1:17:43
  way out of this life. For us, it was like
• 1:17:49
  we saw too many people make it like this. Like
• 1:17:53
  one day they had nothing, and the next day they're
• 1:17:55
  on CBS fucking doing a show for eight years, whether
• 1:17:58
  it's Kevin or whether it's fucking the other guy, the
• 1:18:02
  great guy from Pittsburgh. You've seen that, so it gives
• 1:18:05
  you hope. Now, at that situation, you could say, fuck
• 1:18:08
  that dude. He's a fucking loser. You could go, good
• 1:18:10
  for him. He just moved the notch up a little
• 1:18:12
  bit so I could get on that conveyor line. That's
• 1:18:15
  the beauty of it, not looking at that person going,
• 1:18:18
  fuck him. He sucks. He stole my joke in Pittsburgh.
• 1:18:21
  Who gives a fuck about Pittsburgh in 89? Guy's on
• 1:18:23
  TV now. You know, whatever he is, be happy because
• 1:18:29
  you're next. You know him. You fucking do sets with him. Right.
• 1:18:32
  You're there in the rotation with him at the store
• 1:18:34
  every night.
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it can happen for you too.
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 1: It happens. So once you see it, you go, oh, shit, okay.
• 1:18:40
  Now I know what I need to do.
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 2: That's if you're real.
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: That's if you're real. I need to get off coke.
• 1:18:44
  I need to cut this shit out. I need to
• 1:18:45
  do this, this, and this just to get me closer
• 1:18:48
  to that. Yeah. it too much. I see people living
• 1:18:51
  in an apartment with eight people, and next thing you know,
• 1:18:53
  they got a house in Beverly Hills. Most people don't
• 1:18:56
  see that.
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 1: So it's tough to explain to them what they have
• 1:19:00
  because everybody thinks you're going to hit the lottery and
• 1:19:02
  your life's going to change. Boy, are they mistaken. Everybody
• 1:19:06
  thinks $ 10 million is going to change their life and
• 1:19:08
  make them a better person. It's not. It's not. We
• 1:19:11
  think it's going to. Like, when you were broke all
• 1:19:13
  those years, you used to say, I can't wait to
• 1:19:15
  have money. But you never said, I can't wait to
• 1:19:18
  have money for what?
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 2: I never thought I would have money. Me neither. I
• 1:19:23
  never said, I can't wait to have money. My thought was,
• 1:19:26
  I want to, like, make a living.
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 1: That's it. That's it. That's why I was.
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 2: Even when I first started with stand-up, like, it was
• 1:19:33
  just to make a living. It was just doing this–
• 1:19:35
  I was a fucking loser in like regular society. I
• 1:19:39
  was good at kicking people. I was a loser in
• 1:19:41
  regular society. I was like– I didn't graduate college. I
• 1:19:45
  barely got out of high school. I wasn't paying attention.
• 1:19:49
  I didn't care about school. All I cared about was
• 1:19:51
  whatever I cared about, whether it was drawing or whether
• 1:19:54
  it was martial arts. Those are the things that I
• 1:19:55
  cared about. That's it. So I always felt like I
• 1:19:58
  just need to find a way to live. Because I'm
• 1:20:02
  never going to be a successful person. I had, like,
• 1:20:05
  resigned myself to that. I had no aspirations. You?
• 1:20:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 2: Well, I know you were way worse than me because
• 1:20:11
  you were in and out of jail.
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 1: No, I had no family, felonies, no GED. I was
• 1:20:17
  set to fucking die. Yeah. And that little fucking accident
• 1:20:20
  I had when I was 25 years old, you know,
• 1:20:23
  it's like right now you go and you look at
• 1:20:26
  the news and there's this big thing going on by
• 1:20:28
  the ICE facility by my house in Jersey. In Newark,
• 1:20:32
  they keep fucking banging. And I'm sitting there going, guess
• 1:20:35
  how stupid we are as Americans. I don't know if
• 1:20:37
  Americans know this shit. When you go to jail, you
• 1:20:40
  lose all your rights. You know why I don't go
• 1:20:41
  to jail, Joe? Because that sleep apnea machine doesn't mean
• 1:20:44
  nothing in jail. We don't care if you die. Right.
• 1:20:48
  You know what you have to do to get a
• 1:20:49
  sleep apnea machine in jail? You got to go to
• 1:20:51
  a manufacturer. They have to send it to you directly,
• 1:20:54
  which we'll get into later. But my point is that fucking...
• 1:20:58
  What was my point? I don't even know. I got
• 1:21:00
  so high before.
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 2: Your point was that you never thought you.
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 1: Were going to go anywhere. No, I never thought I
• 1:21:05
  was going to go anywhere.
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 2: Until comedy came around and you realized, oh, this is
• 1:21:09
  a thing that I can do.
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 1: But all I wanted was $ 4, 000 a month. In my mind,
• 1:21:14
  I was such a loser that I said to myself,
• 1:21:16
  if I can make $ 4, 000 a month, I'm a millionaire.
• 1:21:19
  And today, $ 4, 000 a month doesn't even get you rent. Right.
• 1:21:22
  Not even nothing.
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 2: But back then, $ 4, 000 a month was like.
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 1: 8,000 a month now. Yeah, 8,000 a month now.
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 2: And you would say, okay, if I made 100 grand
• 1:21:30
  a year, I can live. Like you can live off
• 1:21:32
  100 grand a year and be comfortable. Like that's the goal.
• 1:21:35
  The goal was always just to be comfortable. But the
• 1:21:38
  thing with you is I realized this like very early on.
• 1:21:42
  You were going to– it was going to take a
• 1:21:44
  different path. Like I remember watching like you emerge when
• 1:21:48
  you really started like hailing on stage and And I
• 1:21:51
  was saying– and then all these agents– you remember I
• 1:21:55
  had that one agent that would get mad that I
• 1:21:57
  would take you on the road with me?
• 1:21:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 2: He would get mad. I was like, what the fuck
• 1:22:01
  is wrong with you? I don't think he's funny. I
• 1:22:03
  don't think he's talented. I go, you don't know what
• 1:22:04
  the fuck you're talking about. You don't know anything. I go,
• 1:22:06
  why does he make me laugh so hard? He's like, well,
• 1:22:09
  you're a degenerate. You're a crazy person. You got to
• 1:22:11
  realize the audience is offended and that's your audience. Like
• 1:22:14
  shut the fuck up. I knew that you were a
• 1:22:17
  different path. So for you, your emergence came with the
• 1:22:22
  emergence of the Internet. And when the Internet came around
• 1:22:27
  and we started doing podcasts, I'm like, this is the
• 1:22:29
  way that Joey's going to break. Because they'll get to
• 1:22:32
  see the real you.
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 1: When I told stories. Yeah. Listen, it's like 24-7 on HBO.
• 1:22:37
  You may hate fucking, I don't know, throw any name up.
• 1:22:41
  You may hate that boxer for some reason. Whatever. He's cocky.
• 1:22:46
  But then they show you his house. and they show
• 1:22:49
  you he's got four daughters, and they show you that
• 1:22:51
  he wakes up every morning and feeds the daughters. You
• 1:22:53
  thought he was a fucking animal. In the cage, he's
• 1:22:56
  an animal. But in life, he's just a regular guy.
• 1:22:59
  And you get to see that and go, now I
• 1:23:01
  like him. I don't see a guy that just punches
• 1:23:03
  people in the head. I see a guy that's, look
• 1:23:05
  at him. He's got fucking makeup on for his daughters,
• 1:23:08
  and he's cooking breakfast every morning. Then he goes trains
• 1:23:11
  like that Jason, what was his name? The big yoke
• 1:23:14
  brother from the UFC, Alexander. Remember he came and he
• 1:23:17
  was knocking heads and they found out he couldn't do jiu-jitsu.
• 1:23:19
  Great guy, though. Houston.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 2: Houston Alexander.
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I watched that thing on him. He
• 1:23:24
  was raising four girls. His wife, the crack mom, left.
• 1:23:28
  That dude was a tank.
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 2: He was a tank.
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 1: And he would train in the morning and then go
• 1:23:31
  home and cook for the kids.
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 2: Remember when he knocked out Keith Jardine? Big upset.
• 1:23:35
  Speaker 1: Big upset.
• 1:23:35
  Speaker 2: Big upset. Keith Jardine just tried to take him out.
• 1:23:38
  And Houston Alexander was throwing bombs.
• 1:23:41
  Speaker 1: He was big and fucking strong.
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 2: Jacked.
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 1: Jacked.
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 2: And he was a radio DJ. You know, he was
• 1:23:46
  a radio DJ.
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 1: I didn't know that.
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he was a hip-hop DJ. Find out where Houston
• 1:23:51
  Alexander was a DJ.
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 1: I'd love to know where he is now.
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 2: Like a big DJ.
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's a good guy.
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 2: Like he was successful.
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 1: He always talked to me at the airport. Very good guy.
• 1:23:58
  Very good guy. I was like, wow. But, you know,
• 1:24:01
  I knew that once I was able to tell my story,
• 1:24:04
  where I came from. I didn't know how to do
• 1:24:07
  it on stage. Then after I did another podcast over
• 1:24:11
  the years, I got better enough to learn how to
• 1:24:13
  do it on stage.
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 2: But you did figure out how to do something on stage.
• 1:24:17
  That was the switch. And the switch was you figured
• 1:24:20
  out how to be Joey Diaz in the parking.
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: Lot on stage. In stage. That was killing me.
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 2: But it went like that.
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 1: Like that.
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 2: I never saw anybody flip a switch from struggling on
• 1:24:30
  stage to crushing like you. I was like, this is wild.
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 1: And I'm going to tell you some of the reasons.
• 1:24:37
  I was too focused on material. You're too focused on
• 1:24:42
  your fucking material. And you know what? At the end
• 1:24:43
  of the day, your material sucks. I've heard it already.
• 1:24:45
  And that's what I would think in my mind. So
• 1:24:47
  I would do better when I went up there just
• 1:24:51
  with one thought and attacked it. You know what I mean?
• 1:24:54
  I mean, it's hard to explain what I'm saying to you. Yeah.
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 2: No, you, what you, what you did was you treated
• 1:25:02
  the audience like they were your boys and we're all
• 1:25:04
  hanging out versus treat the audience like I'm a comic.
• 1:25:08
  Here's some jokes. Like, when you first started, when I first,
• 1:25:11
  what did I meet you in, 96?
• 1:25:13
  Speaker 1: 97.
• 1:25:13
  Speaker 2: 97. When I first met you, you were doing jokes.
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 2: Like, you would go on stage and do jokes.
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 1: And I would focus on the jokes on that paper.
• 1:25:21
  Don't focus on that. At 1130 at the store, your
• 1:25:24
  jokes don't mean shit. They just saw three hours of
• 1:25:28
  top-notch comedy. What are you bringing to the table? You're
• 1:25:31
  going to go up there and tell me what I
• 1:25:32
  saw on the news? And who taught us that? Paul Mooney.
• 1:25:36
  How to relax. He would just go up there. In
• 1:25:38
  my mind, he was just vibing with the audience. He
• 1:25:41
  did a lot of that. And it worked. And I
• 1:25:43
  took that realm of relax.
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 2: Mooney taught us a lot.
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: Relax.
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 2: He was a real veteran. You know, he was like
• 1:25:51
  one of the only guys when we were there that
• 1:25:53
  was there during the prior years.
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 1: The prior years.
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 2: And was respected. He wasn't like one of those... There
• 1:25:59
  was a few guys that were still hanging around that
• 1:26:01
  had literally acts from the 1980s.
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 1: They were still doing like Springsteen jokes.
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 2: It was just bad.
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 1: But his laid back attitude.
• 1:26:09
  Speaker 2: Always topical too. Always new shit. Anytime new shit was
• 1:26:13
  going on the news, he had 10 solid minutes on it.
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 1: And quick.
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 1: That day. If it happened, he told on the news
• 1:26:19
  that night.
• 1:26:20
  Speaker 2: I remember he was crushing on stage once. We were
• 1:26:22
  dying in the back room.
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 1: He goes, oh, that's right. I write, motherfucker.
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 2: I write.
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 2: No, no.
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 1: He's a fucking.
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 2: We were dying.
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 1: But that calmness taught me how to. I was going
• 1:26:31
  up there and rushing. Yeah. I was going up there
• 1:26:33
  doing two mistakes, rushing and worrying about that material like
• 1:26:37
  it was Bible. Right. I'll give you an example. Sometimes
• 1:26:43
  I get an audition, right, when I was doing an audition.
• 1:26:46
  This is when I learned that, early on when I
• 1:26:47
  was auditioning. that if I focused on that line, those lines,
• 1:26:52
  I wasn't going to book that part. So I had
• 1:26:56
  to dip into Marlon Brando's fucking tools. Marlon Brando didn't
• 1:27:00
  read shit. He put those signs on you so you
• 1:27:02
  felt more organic. But it wasn't even that. It was
• 1:27:07
  know who your character is. I could tell you to
• 1:27:09
  go fuck your mother 18 different ways. Right? Right. So
• 1:27:14
  it's the same thing. You have to just learn, not
• 1:27:18
  the words, but what he's trying to say in there.
• 1:27:22
  You don't need the words. The words are bullshit. What
• 1:27:24
  is this guy trying to say in there? Yeah, you
• 1:27:27
  take some of the sentences that he's saying, but you
• 1:27:29
  slow it down. And that's what he did in that
• 1:27:30
  scene when he tells everybody if my son should hang
• 1:27:34
  by a bolt of lightning, you, then out, Marlon Brando
• 1:27:38
  in the hotel scene. That's a beautiful fucking scene if
• 1:27:41
  you love that shit like I do. All those motherfuckers
• 1:27:44
  were wearing signs. You've seen the behind the scenes of that.
• 1:27:48
  Speaker 2: So their words, the script was on papers.
• 1:27:52
  Speaker 1: So Duval was sitting across from him with a billboard.
• 1:27:55
  That's hilarious. That boss was sitting across from him. And
• 1:27:57
  you see him like he'd just look up. And that
• 1:28:02
  I will not forgive. And he'd take another pause and
• 1:28:04
  look at another cue card because he wanted it to
• 1:28:07
  be organic. He didn't want it to sound like those
• 1:28:10
  fucking lines this writer wrote. Right. And that's for everything.
• 1:28:13
  If you know the character, I know the character. I
• 1:28:16
  know me. That's crazy. Everybody had science, dog.
• 1:28:21
  Speaker 2: That is really crazy.
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 1: But it worked.
• 1:28:24
  Speaker 2: Isn't that crazy?
• 1:28:25
  Speaker 1: Did it work? In the Godfather, did it work? Okay,
• 1:28:28
  so go fuck yourself.
• 1:28:29
  Speaker 2: I was watching this thing where they were very skeptical
• 1:28:32
  about him.
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 1: Playing. Oh, did you see the Sony thing? Yeah. The
• 1:28:35
  Sony series? Very good.
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, very good.
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 1: Very good.
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 2: Wasn't it interesting? Imagine skeptical about Marlon Brando playing the Godfather.
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 1: Well, brother, he had shot a movie, Mutiny on the Bounty,
• 1:28:48
  and they went down there and the motherfucker fucked that
• 1:28:50
  chick and he wasn't even directing anymore. He was in
• 1:28:52
  a hut. He gave like the AD, the camera. You
• 1:28:55
  didn't hear about that? Yeah. That's a huge story.
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 2: That's Apocalypse Now, right? No.
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 1: And then Apocalypse Now, he went to a meeting, they
• 1:29:02
  gave him all this loot, and they told him, you
• 1:29:04
  got to show up 180. Like, you're supposed to be
• 1:29:06
  a Green Beret. Right. He showed up 400.
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 2: Well, that's why they kept him in the.
• 1:29:10
  Speaker 1: Dark, right? They kept him in the dark, and he
• 1:29:12
  shaved his head.
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 2: Gave him a black shirt.
• 1:29:13
  Speaker 1: You know, he didn't give a fuck. He did it however,
• 1:29:16
  and that's why they hated him. But at the same time,
• 1:29:19
  you got to love the motherfucker, because it's working.
• 1:29:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, it was authentic, right?
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 1: Right. Yeah, that Apple TV show was very interesting. It was. Very.
• 1:29:29
  And I met that dude. Remember, he created The Longest Yard.
• 1:29:34
  Al Ruddy did The Longest Yard from scratch. When he
• 1:29:37
  did The Godfather, I think he didn't take two, and
• 1:29:41
  he went to do The Longest Yard. He loved it.
• 1:29:44
  So he created The Longest Yard. So when we shot
• 1:29:46
  Our Longest Yard, he was there every Friday for his
• 1:29:48
  little checky-poo. Big motherfucker. Big dude, dog. Good dude. Big
• 1:29:53
  hands and shit. would just talk to you about stuff.
• 1:29:56
  Good dude. So I got it. Like that motherfucker, you know, Rudy,
• 1:30:02
  I think he did something else after that. Look at
• 1:30:03
  the movies he did. Look at the movies he did. Jamie,
• 1:30:07
  when you get a minute, Paul Rudy's films.
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 2: What was that other question that I asked you earlier?
• 1:30:12
  Speaker 1: About?
• 1:30:12
  Speaker 2: I asked you to look something up. Did you know
• 1:30:15
  that there was a DJ in Omaha?
• 1:30:16
  Speaker 1: Yes, Omaha.
• 1:30:17
  Speaker 2: Yes, Omaha.
• 1:30:17
  Speaker 1: He was from Omaha. That's what it is.
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 2: What radio station? Is he still doing it? Yeah, it
• 1:30:25
  says he currently is. He currently is still. Look at that.
• 1:30:29
  Speaker 1: We got to call him.
• 1:30:30
  Speaker 2: I think he fought recently. I think he had a fight, like,
• 1:30:34
  within the last couple of years. Did he?
• 1:30:37
  Speaker 1: This says 2017 for MMA box. Bare knuckle boxing in 2023.
• 1:30:43
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 1:30:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah. 104 of his bare knuckle fights. Yeah.
• 1:30:48
  Speaker 2: Bare knuckle fighting. Dude's a DJ. UFC veteran. I said,
• 1:30:52
  fuck it. Let's get some bare knuckle fights in.
• 1:30:54
  Speaker 1: How fucking great is that? That you could DJ and
• 1:30:56
  then go fight somebody.
• 1:30:57
  Speaker 2: Crazy.
• 1:30:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And that's life, man. That's a life that's worth living.
• 1:31:02
  You got your money. You're getting your money's worth. It's
• 1:31:03
  a wild life. Yeah. You're getting your money's worth. Yeah.
• 1:31:05
  You want to sit at home, be sanitary, whatever, live like,
• 1:31:08
  you know, watching TV and you're scared they're going to
• 1:31:10
  bomb you. You're done. You got to keep fucking living.
• 1:31:13
  And that's what, you know. Yeah.
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 2: You got to do things. That's the thing about life.
• 1:31:17
  You got to do things. Too many people just sit
• 1:31:19
  around wanting to do things and not doing anything. It's
• 1:31:22
  hard to get moving, though. That's what a lot of
• 1:31:24
  people find. They find it's hard to, like, go out
• 1:31:27
  to that club for that first open mic, step into
• 1:31:29
  that gym the first time. Like D-Rod, Daniel Rodriguez, did
• 1:31:33
  you see that podcast? We talked about how he got
• 1:31:35
  arrested in Tijuana. You know D-Rod from the UFC? Yeah.
• 1:31:40
  So D-Rod beats Kevin Holland, right, goes to San Diego celebrating,
• 1:31:45
  and his boy's like, let's go to Tijuana. Fuck yeah,
• 1:31:47
  let's go to Tijuana. Just go to drink. Have a
• 1:31:49
  good time. He just won a huge fight. Top 15
• 1:31:53
  UFC welterweight. Has an ounce of weed in his bag.
• 1:31:57
  He thinks, well, weed's legal in California. Weed's decriminalized in Mexico.
• 1:32:01
  Who cares? Maybe I'll bribe somebody. I'll get out of this.
• 1:32:04
  It's a federal offense to bring weed in. And even
• 1:32:07
  though weed's decriminalized in Mexico, it's not for visitors. It's
• 1:32:11
  only for Mexican citizens.
• 1:32:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, bro. How do you get out of that one?
• 1:32:17
  Speaker 2: Well, one of the things he had to do was
• 1:32:18
  become a Mexican citizen. So he's got dual citizenship now.
• 1:32:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:32:23
  Speaker 2: He was in jail for fucking eight months, man.
• 1:32:25
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Yeah.
• 1:32:26
  Speaker 2: He was just training in jail. He looks great. He
• 1:32:28
  looks great now. But when he got out, he's like,
• 1:32:31
  I had no protein. So I'm in there working out
• 1:32:33
  every day with fucking eating noodles and potato chips.
• 1:32:36
  Speaker 1: No protein.
• 1:32:37
  Speaker 2: No protein. And so he got real thin. Like he
• 1:32:40
  showed a photo of him like the day he got out.
• 1:32:42
  I mean, this motherfucker was training every day, twice a day.
• 1:32:45
  In jail. He's like, I'm going to make the most
• 1:32:47
  out of this. But he has no food. The food's terrible.
• 1:32:51
  Speaker 1: So his body had wasted away. I think I used
• 1:32:53
  to get protein powder. He couldn't.
• 1:32:53
  Speaker 2: He asked. He tried to get it. He said, you
• 1:32:55
  can get girls. You get all these different things. He goes,
• 1:32:57
  you couldn't get fucking good food.
• 1:32:59
  Speaker 1: In Mexico.
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 2: In Mexico.
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:33:01
  Speaker 2: And he was a cellmate with a cartel guy. The
• 1:33:04
  cartel guy took care of him. The cartel guy recognized him.
• 1:33:06
  We'll take care of you. Hang out with us. And
• 1:33:08
  he just said, I'm going to keep my nose down.
• 1:33:10
  Just train. But he said he got a bunch of
• 1:33:11
  guys training with him because they were inspired. They're like,
• 1:33:14
  fuck yeah, let's train with D-Rod. So he had all
• 1:33:17
  these guys in there. He said some of them were
• 1:33:18
  fucking talented.
• 1:33:19
  Speaker 1: Well, prison's fun. I don't give a fuck what anybody
• 1:33:23
  tells you. Once you get to your destination and you
• 1:33:26
  meet your homies and you create a little thing, it's
• 1:33:29
  like anything else. We just can't step out the walls.
• 1:33:32
  But you make it happen. I laughed a lot in that, bro.
• 1:33:35
  I laughed.
• 1:33:36
  Speaker 2: I bet you did.
• 1:33:37
  Speaker 1: Because nobody's funny in prison than black people. I don't
• 1:33:39
  give a fuck what they tell you. They're the true
• 1:33:42
  kings of the prison system. And I had the two best.
• 1:33:46
  I just had the two best. And, you know, sometimes that's.
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 2: Why you first did stand up, right?
• 1:33:50
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 1:33:51
  Speaker 2: First it'd stand up just for the inmates.
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Wednesday, Thursday nights. They'd just have you go up
• 1:33:54
  and they'd just talk some shit. During the movies, they
• 1:33:56
  would go, this movie sucks. They'd be like, PT-109. You know,
• 1:33:59
  we don't want to see fucking Kennedy in a movie.
• 1:34:01
  Get up there, Cuba. And I would just go up
• 1:34:03
  there and fuck around. It was nothing that I ever
• 1:34:08
  thought about anything. You said something before, thinking about the
• 1:34:12
  first time you went to that open mic. Boy, was
• 1:34:14
  that scary for me. Terrifying. Took me eight months. I
• 1:34:16
  was such a pussy. I would call the Comedy Works
• 1:34:19
  in Denver every week, and every week I'd cancel. Joey Diaz,
• 1:34:22
  you have a three-minute spot. Oh, I don't feel good.
• 1:34:26
  And then my ex-wife, God bless her, as much as
• 1:34:28
  I hate her, she heard me on the phone, and
• 1:34:29
  she asked her mother to babysit. And she drove me down,
• 1:34:33
  and I got on stage, and I remember getting off
• 1:34:34
  that stage going, how am I going to do this?
• 1:34:37
  I'm married with a kid. And three months later, she
• 1:34:40
  came over. She's like, you're a loser. I don't want
• 1:34:41
  to be married to you no more. I'm like, yes.
• 1:34:44
  Speaker 2: Holy fuck.
• 1:34:46
  Speaker 1: You just did me fucking solid. Then she did me
• 1:34:49
  shitty afterward, but the point is she at least got
• 1:34:52
  me to that open mic. So I have to be
• 1:34:54
  grateful for something that she did, you know?
• 1:34:57
  Speaker 2: The first step's the hard one. What I was saying
• 1:35:00
  about D-Rod, like the first time he ever went to
• 1:35:02
  the gym, his girlfriend got him a membership. She was like,
• 1:35:06
  because he drove by it a bunch of times, thought
• 1:35:09
  about training, never went in. He had a bunch of
• 1:35:12
  street fights, never went in. He's like, I think I
• 1:35:14
  can do that. And then finally she's like, look, I
• 1:35:16
  got your present. I got your membership.
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 1: Hold that thought. Can I go pee real quick? We're
• 1:35:21
  at the two-hour mark. We'll be right back, ladies and gentlemen.
• 1:35:23
  We'll be right back. I got to go pee. And
• 1:35:27
  we're back. That was a tremendous pee. Oh, my God.
• 1:35:32
  Speaker 2: The worst is when you try to concentrate and you
• 1:35:33
  have to piss.
• 1:35:34
  Speaker 1: No, that's the worst. That's the fucking worst. You have
• 1:35:37
  to drive and shit and you got to pee. And
• 1:35:40
  to an age, I just pull over. Yeah?
• 1:35:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:35:43
  Speaker 1: Highway, whatever. I open up the both doors, and I
• 1:35:45
  make believe I'm looking for something, and that dick is
• 1:35:48
  out peeing. I pee on the little league field, and
• 1:35:51
  after the surgery, they gave me a handicap spark, and
• 1:35:54
  I'm living like a doctor. You don't know what life
• 1:35:58
  is until you have handicap parking, dog. You just pull
• 1:36:02
  right up. There's always a spot?
• 1:36:04
  Speaker 2: Always.
• 1:36:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Like four feet away. When I got in the mail, dog,
• 1:36:09
  I was happier. That made me so happy. Fuck walking.
• 1:36:13
  When I go to events now in Philadelphia, I just
• 1:36:15
  pull up and shit. Put a neck brace on, walk
• 1:36:19
  out and shit. Oh, it's been a beautiful job.
• 1:36:21
  Speaker 2: What do you have to do to get one of those?
• 1:36:23
  Speaker 1: The doctor.
• 1:36:24
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 1:36:24
  Speaker 1: The doctor was like, oh, do you have it after surgery?
• 1:36:27
  I get it for you for six months. And then
• 1:36:29
  he goes, hold on one second. He went online. He's like, dog,
• 1:36:32
  you qualify for everything. You got everything on this list. Everything. Go.
• 1:36:37
  And they gave it to me for fucking like three years. Oh, nice. Yeah.
• 1:36:41
  I fucking, oh, tremendous, Joe.
• 1:36:43
  Speaker 2: How does it feel right now? You all right?
• 1:36:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it feels okay. I just listen. What happens is
• 1:36:48
  you do something every week. Like the second week I went,
• 1:36:52
  third week I went, a couple weeks I went boxing,
• 1:36:54
  and it was good for like three times. And one
• 1:36:57
  day I went and I had a plan, 20 for
• 1:36:59
  five minutes, eight rounds, on the bag or the speed bag,
• 1:37:03
  but I do the bags and I alternate the bags.
• 1:37:05
  Sure enough, round number six, one of the guys comes
• 1:37:07
  over and he goes, Joey, let's hit the mitts. I'm excited.
• 1:37:10
  You know, he's a young guy. Let's do it. I
• 1:37:12
  left there. My fucking leg blew up from that right
• 1:37:14
  punch to cross because everything walks into it.
• 1:37:17
  Speaker 2: You're also moving around.
• 1:37:18
  Speaker 1: You're moving around. So I said, fuck it. Now I
• 1:37:20
  got to stand in front of the bag. So I
• 1:37:22
  learned my lesson. And then last week I went to
• 1:37:26
  PT and that motherfucker had me. I mean, I love him.
• 1:37:29
  But TJ, this motherfucker had me doing deadlifts and wall
• 1:37:33
  squats with a thing where your weight.
• 1:37:36
  Speaker 2: So it's all just to strengthen the muscles back up.
• 1:37:38
  Speaker 1: You have to. You have to strengthen. But I prepped.
• 1:37:41
  I listened to you guys. I did everything I could
• 1:37:44
  before the surgery. That's what made it easier. Made it
• 1:37:48
  a lot easier. I called you. I told you I
• 1:37:49
  was doing shit in five days. I didn't have a
• 1:37:51
  cane no more. You know, I was done. I started
• 1:37:54
  driving at eight days. Not because I couldn't, but because
• 1:37:57
  I was sick and tired of my wife driving me places.
• 1:37:59
  And I got to, you know, argue with her on
• 1:38:01
  the right-hand lane. No problem? Yeah, like a motherfucker.
• 1:38:04
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 1:38:05
  Speaker 1: That's crazy. It was the right foot, which is the
• 1:38:06
  accelerated brake combo. So, yeah. But, yeah, I was out
• 1:38:10
  of the house. You know, the pain pills were done
• 1:38:13
  after eight days. Then I had to bring them back.
• 1:38:15
  For PT, they were fucking killing me after PT. So
• 1:38:19
  after PT, you pop one, go home, put ice on it,
• 1:38:22
  rub it down with the cream and stay off it
• 1:38:24
  for an hour or two. But then at night, I
• 1:38:26
  take a walk around the neighborhood. You're trying to strengthen
• 1:38:29
  this shit. Right. right. You know, we're talking about it outside.
• 1:38:32
  Let's say you're in a hospital for five days and
• 1:38:34
  you eat cereal for five fucking days. You gain weight.
• 1:38:38
  Your muscle breaks down and goes away. Like five days
• 1:38:41
  stay in a hospital could fucking kill you just because, again,
• 1:38:44
  there's not that much protein. You're not getting 150 grams
• 1:38:46
  of protein a day. And you're not moving. And you're
• 1:38:49
  not moving. Yeah, that's the big one. I prepped for
• 1:38:52
  the surgery. I took all the supplements Ways to Well
• 1:38:54
  told me. Everything. Bespirine. I took shit. My fucking piss
• 1:38:58
  is like glows in the dark at night. Purple, yellow.
• 1:39:02
  It's fucking amazing. I did all my PTs, all my BPCs, 157,
• 1:39:07
  all my TB500s. I did them for fucking to the
• 1:39:11
  T like they told me to. And, you know, listen,
• 1:39:14
  I'm 63 and it's a 63-year-old knee. So I don't
• 1:39:17
  expect to be in the UFC fighting O'Gara next week.
• 1:39:20
  But I could walk around and enjoy life with no
• 1:39:23
  fucking pain. Or no, it's not pain. You always have
• 1:39:26
  an issue. You know it. You always have that thing
• 1:39:28
  with your knees. Sometimes it sticks. Well, then you got
• 1:39:32
  to do simple shit. You got to get a piece
• 1:39:34
  of paper, put it on the floor, and just roll
• 1:39:36
  your heel back and forth 20 times and do kicks
• 1:39:39
  when you're sitting around. All those things help the knee.
• 1:39:41
  You get that band and you put it around your
• 1:39:43
  leg and you just straighten out your leg. I do
• 1:39:46
  that at home. This is shit I do at home,
• 1:39:48
  you know, instead of watching TV. It takes 15 fucking minutes.
• 1:39:50
  15 fucking minutes of your time. And I got the
• 1:39:53
  bull worker. They sent me a bull worker.
• 1:39:55
  Speaker 2: What's that?
• 1:39:56
  Speaker 1: The thing I told you last time about it. It's
• 1:39:58
  isometric shit.
• 1:39:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
• 1:40:00
  Speaker 1: So I did the bull worker. I did the deadlifts
• 1:40:02
  at the bull worker. Now I'm fucked because I don't
• 1:40:04
  know how to change the strings. So I got to
• 1:40:06
  learn how to fucking change the strings. But that's all
• 1:40:08
  it was. It was preparing for the surgery. Right. You
• 1:40:11
  can't just go in there and not strengthen anything. The
• 1:40:14
  little muscles around the area. Yeah. That's it.
• 1:40:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you got to do something. It's very important, especially
• 1:40:21
  if you're going to go into surgery. I know a
• 1:40:23
  lot of people that have had knee surgery and didn't
• 1:40:25
  do that.
• 1:40:25
  Speaker 1: They won't go to PT. It's like, you don't go
• 1:40:28
  to PT. What the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah.
• 1:40:31
  They came. Listen, I had the surgery Thursday. They were
• 1:40:33
  in my house knocking Friday fucking afternoon. I was home
• 1:40:36
  Friday from the hospital, and they said they're coming over today.
• 1:40:41
  That motherfucker had me going up and down stairs, walking
• 1:40:44
  outside with the cane, getting in and out of the tub.
• 1:40:47
  I don't even have a tub. I have a walk-in shower.
• 1:40:49
  But he was like, I'm going to do everything with you.
• 1:40:52
  So it was pretty fucking, like I said, this surgery
• 1:40:54
  was a lot better. The company that I did business
• 1:40:58
  with was a lot better. Last time I did it
• 1:41:01
  at Center State. That's like a medical network in New Jersey.
• 1:41:05
  Not bad. They have a great facility there, but, you know,
• 1:41:08
  When I went to do the surgery, my acupuncturist said,
• 1:41:11
  when you go talk to that guy the day before
• 1:41:13
  the surgery, ask him about the sanitary conditions at that hospital.
• 1:41:18
  So when I went, I said, hey, what's the sanitary
• 1:41:20
  conditions at the hospital? He's like, ah, you hear rumors.
• 1:41:24
  And then when I went for the surgery, they prepped
• 1:41:27
  me up. They gave me everything. They gave me the IV.
• 1:41:28
  They were right about to do that thing in my back.
• 1:41:32
  And he said, we're not doing the surgery. I don't
• 1:41:34
  agree with sanitary. I was pissed, but I'm like happy.
• 1:41:38
  Speaker 2: The doctor didn't agree with the sanitary conditions?
• 1:41:40
  Speaker 1: He came out and said, no, not today. We'll do
• 1:41:43
  it next week at a different hospital.
• 1:41:45
  Speaker 2: What?
• 1:41:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:41:46
  Speaker 2: That's crazy. So were people getting Mercer or something?
• 1:41:48
  Speaker 1: Something. They had Mercer in there. And they're like, no.
• 1:41:51
  Everybody was telling me, be careful with the Mercer in
• 1:41:53
  that hospital.
• 1:41:53
  Speaker 2: Oh, Mercer's fucking terrifying.
• 1:41:55
  Speaker 1: But the funny thing was he gave me a 20
• 1:41:57
  milligram oxy, which they never give you. That's a strong motherfucker.
• 1:42:00
  And I forgot I took it. Remember I told you.
• 1:42:02
  Speaker 2: I forgot.
• 1:42:03
  Speaker 1: I'm at a Chinese restaurant yelling, Gino. I'm like, what
• 1:42:06
  the fuck? I was fucked up for eight hours on
• 1:42:10
  that thing.
• 1:42:11
  Speaker 2: So they give it to you before the surgery?
• 1:42:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, just one of the precautions. They did that.
• 1:42:15
  Speaker 2: A precaution?
• 1:42:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, precaution, whatever. So you don't wake up in the
• 1:42:19
  middle of surgery yelling and fucking screaming like a pussy.
• 1:42:23
  They do that. The epidural was tough because I felt
• 1:42:27
  it in my nutsack. Like, they give you a couple shots,
• 1:42:29
  and one of the shots made me actually go like
• 1:42:31
  this because I felt it on the bottom towards the
• 1:42:34
  end of the nutsack, not on the meat and potatoes part,
• 1:42:37
  but towards the end, close to the muffler. I was like,
• 1:42:44
  this is not bueno, dog.
• 1:42:46
  Speaker 2: What is the thing they do? I saw this video
• 1:42:49
  online about it. It's like, I think it's called nerve ablation.
• 1:42:52
  I might be making that up. But they literally like
• 1:42:55
  cut the nerves off when people have back pain. Like
• 1:42:58
  some people with back pain, it's like they're in constant
• 1:43:00
  nerve pain. And they were showing how they just snip
• 1:43:04
  the nerves. And I was like, wait a minute. Does
• 1:43:07
  that hinder your movement? Like what happens there?
• 1:43:11
  Speaker 1: Is this it? Yeah.
• 1:43:13
  Speaker 2: So what is that? Radio frequency ablation for back pain management.
• 1:43:18
  What does it mean? Like what do they do? Because
• 1:43:21
  the way I was looking online, I'm like, it looks
• 1:43:22
  like they just cut the nerves. A minimally invasive outpatient
• 1:43:27
  procedure uses heat to intentionally damage nerves carrying pain signals
• 1:43:32
  from the spine to the brain. Primarily provides long-lasting relief
• 1:43:36
  for chronic back pain caused by arthritis or facet joint degeneration.
• 1:43:41
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 1:43:42
  Speaker 2: But does that mean your back just keeps getting worse
• 1:43:44
  but you don't feel it? What happens when you do that?
• 1:43:49
  Speaker 1: Durations.
• 1:43:52
  Speaker 2: Back, please. The procedure typically takes 30 to 60 minutes.
• 1:43:55
  You could usually go home the same day. Pain relief
• 1:43:59
  is not immediate. It often takes one to three weeks
• 1:44:01
  for the nerve to fully settle. Relief typically lasts anywhere
• 1:44:04
  from six to 12 months, although it can last for
• 1:44:06
  several years for some patients. Are the nerves permanently destroyed? No,
• 1:44:10
  the nerves regenerate over time. When the nerve grows back,
• 1:44:13
  your pain may return, but the procedure can be repeated.
• 1:44:17
  What is the recovery and risks? What's the risks? complications
• 1:44:22
  are rare but include infection, bleeding at the insertion site,
• 1:44:25
  temporary numbness, or skin irritation. Oh, normal stuff. Huh. Interesting. Pain.
• 1:44:33
  That's nuts, man. Just shut off the pain. You kind
• 1:44:36
  of want to know if it hurts, though, no? I
• 1:44:38
  would imagine, like, you're doing more damage if it hurts, right?
• 1:44:43
  Speaker 1: It's like cortisol. You're numbing it.
• 1:44:45
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 1:44:45
  Speaker 1: And then it keeps getting worse, but you don't feel.
• 1:44:48
  Speaker 2: Well, especially cortisone. With cortisone, you can only do that
• 1:44:51
  so many times for like joints. It can degrade tendons
• 1:44:56
  and stuff. Because some people, their knuckleheads, they just keep
• 1:44:59
  getting cortisone shots. Next thing you know, your shoulder falls apart.
• 1:45:01
  Speaker 1: You don't know. That's the worst thing.
• 1:45:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah. You could tear shit.
• 1:45:04
  Speaker 1: And that's what they'll let you do if you let them.
• 1:45:07
  So this is what I'm saying. Unless you check out
• 1:45:09
  what option. Listen, it's 2026, man. I'm scared of needles.
• 1:45:14
  And I'll tell you, half my life, I fucked up
• 1:45:16
  because I was scared of needles. If I would have just,
• 1:45:20
  I don't know what it was. I was just scared
• 1:45:21
  of needles. Now I'll fucking take a needle wherever the
• 1:45:25
  fuck you want to give it to. You know what
• 1:45:28
  I'm saying? Like now you can shoot me while I'm
• 1:45:29
  standing up.
• 1:45:30
  Speaker 2: Once you get used to doing peptides, needles don't mean shit.
• 1:45:33
  Speaker 1: And those are just diabetic needles. They don't do fucking shit.
• 1:45:35
  It's good to stop taking medicine if you.
• 1:45:38
  Speaker 2: Don't want to take medicine. Ah, that makes sense. So
• 1:45:40
  if you're in pain anyway. So a success rate is
• 1:45:43
  70% to 85%. It's most stressful when the procedure targets
• 1:45:48
  the medial branch nerves responsible for facet joint arthritis. Success
• 1:45:53
  typically defined as 50% or greater reduction in lower back pain,
• 1:45:57
  better physical function, reduced need for pain medication. That's big.
• 1:46:01
  Because some people, they're just a fucking– especially back stuff.
• 1:46:04
  Some people are just in agony every day. They wake
• 1:46:07
  up and they're just in agony. And it's a long
• 1:46:10
  road back to getting– if you have back pain, it's
• 1:46:14
  a long road to heal that shit. You've got to
• 1:46:17
  be very, very smart about it. And you've got to stretch.
• 1:46:20
  That's one thing that a lot of people don't like
• 1:46:22
  to do. A lot of lower back pain. A lot
• 1:46:25
  of that is just everything's tight. And you can stretch
• 1:46:28
  and relieve a lot of that shit. A lot of that.
• 1:46:31
  Speaker 1: Yoga comes in handy. You don't go anymore, do you?
• 1:46:33
  You don't go anymore.
• 1:46:34
  Speaker 2: I do a lot of yoga things, though.
• 1:46:36
  Speaker 1: At your house? Yeah.
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 2: We actually have a yoga room in the studio. I've
• 1:46:39
  never used it. We've got a heated room. We could
• 1:46:42
  crank that fucker up to 105 degrees and do yoga
• 1:46:44
  in there.
• 1:46:44
  Speaker 1: I haven't done the red light. I'll tell you what
• 1:46:46
  else I did after the surgery that worked. Hyperbaric chamber. Oh, yeah.
• 1:46:50
  That's big. I did that twice a week. I still
• 1:46:52
  got six left. That's huge for recovery.
• 1:46:54
  Speaker 2: For recovery, that's fantastic.
• 1:46:55
  Speaker 1: And my oxygen levels are always low, Joe. I got
• 1:46:58
  to figure, I got to talk to Waze tomorrow. Every
• 1:47:00
  morning I wake up, 88%. You know, I'm always in
• 1:47:04
  the red zone. Because I think lack of oxygen is
• 1:47:07
  helping me burn fat and a lot of other shit.
• 1:47:10
  My oxygen's at 88 some days, 85.
• 1:47:13
  Speaker 2: Why would that help you burn fat?
• 1:47:15
  Speaker 1: Because you need oxygen to do everything. You need oxygen
• 1:47:18
  for a fucking fire.
• 1:47:19
  Speaker 2: So if you have low oxygen, you burn fat?
• 1:47:21
  Speaker 1: How can you recuperate? How can you fully recuperate with
• 1:47:24
  no oxygen in your fucking, I think, I don't fucking know.
• 1:47:29
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure that's correct. But I think that the
• 1:47:35
  more you exercise, the more you're going to get oxygen
• 1:47:37
  in your system for sure. The hyperbaric pain chamber will help,
• 1:47:40
  but once you're fully healed up and you can really
• 1:47:43
  exercise on a regular basis, it'll get back to normal.
• 1:47:47
  Speaker 1: No, because I do breath exercise every morning. That's what
• 1:47:50
  you have to do. You have to breathe through your
• 1:47:51
  nose like 10 times and then hold it.
• 1:47:54
  Speaker 2: What do they think is causing it, the low oxygen?
• 1:47:56
  Speaker 1: They don't know. They don't know nothing. They don't know nothing.
• 1:47:58
  They don't want to find out nothing. But I'll take
• 1:48:01
  the cord and the clip that you put on your finger,
• 1:48:04
  I'll put it on my ear. It gives you a
• 1:48:05
  better read.
• 1:48:08
  Speaker 2: What's more accurate?
• 1:48:10
  Speaker 1: So far, the ear for me. I learned that from
• 1:48:12
  an old Filipino lady in the hospital. She had all
• 1:48:15
  the tricks. So I do that. I test it. You know,
• 1:48:18
  when I wake up in the morning, I have it.
• 1:48:19
  I check my blood pressure like twice a day it's
• 1:48:22
  the best it's been in 20 fucking years I think some.
• 1:48:25
  Speaker 2: Of those Fitbits can do that shit now can they
• 1:48:27
  do that do they measure oxygen levels some of those
• 1:48:33
  really advanced wearable devices can measure oxygen levels too now
• 1:48:37
  I think is that real.
• 1:48:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, they all do. They all do. That's part
• 1:48:44
  of the deal. They measure your heart rate, heart rate variable.
• 1:48:48
  Speaker 2: Like those wearables, like the wrist stuff?
• 1:48:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:48:50
  Speaker 2: Oh, really?
• 1:48:50
  Speaker 1: So I'll tell you what I got in mind. I got...
• 1:48:52
  What the fuck? In the mornings, it tells you.
• 1:48:56
  Speaker 2: What are you wearing?
• 1:48:57
  Speaker 1: A whoop. Yeah, within range. The whoop does that?
• 1:48:59
  Speaker 2: The whoop tests oxygen levels?
• 1:49:02
  Speaker 1: No. It has... Respiratory rate?
• 1:49:06
  Speaker 2: I got to get back on the whoop. I used
• 1:49:08
  to use it all the time. They've gotten even better.
• 1:49:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this one is a lot better. My heart rate's
• 1:49:13
  good today. My oxygen's 91 because I'm here with you.
• 1:49:17
  And my skin temperature's minus one, so it takes all
• 1:49:20
  that shit.
• 1:49:22
  Speaker 2: My problem with wearables is all these tattoos. So, like, this... Oh, okay,
• 1:49:27
  it's reading it now. This reads my heart rate. This
• 1:49:30
  is a Garmin. It reads my heart rate. Now it's not.
• 1:49:33
  It doesn't read through the tattoos very well. I have
• 1:49:35
  to move it around.
• 1:49:37
  Speaker 1: That's fucking insane. Yeah. That's fucking insane.
• 1:49:40
  Speaker 2: You can't read through the tattoos because the ink's in
• 1:49:43
  the way. It's literally using some sort of a visual system.
• 1:49:49
  It's light. If you look at the back of the watch,
• 1:49:53
  there's a light back there.
• 1:49:56
  Speaker 1: See? Yeah, I understand.
• 1:49:57
  Speaker 2: That is flashing into your veins.
• 1:50:00
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 1:50:01
  Speaker 2: And then it somehow or another gets information from that.
• 1:50:04
  And that's how it tells.
• 1:50:05
  Speaker 1: You your heart rate. Yeah, because I have the same thing. Yeah.
• 1:50:07
  Speaker 2: So the problem is all these tattoos. I thought about, like,
• 1:50:10
  removing my tattoos just around the circle where the watch goes. Just, like,
• 1:50:16
  go get it lasered. I might do it. Because I
• 1:50:19
  don't see that anyway. No. I always have a watch on.
• 1:50:23
  And so, like, now it's reading.
• 1:50:24
  Speaker 1: Speaking about, you know, burning your nerves and all that
• 1:50:27
  shit and that thing. Mm-hmm. One year, I still got
• 1:50:31
  a fungi toenail, but I had a really bad fungi toenail.
• 1:50:35
  And I saw a thing in Groupon for a company
• 1:50:37
  in Studio City that blow-toasted it with heat for six sessions.
• 1:50:41
  Did it kill the fungus? Yeah. No, it never worked.
• 1:50:44
  But I went anyway. The lady would put, like, a
• 1:50:46
  mask on. And she'd look at my toenail like you
• 1:50:49
  would see a fucking... And as she was burning it,
• 1:50:52
  you could smell the fungus burning. It smells like dead
• 1:50:56
  fucking assholes. And she would be like... And I would
• 1:51:00
  ask her questions so she'd have to pull the mask off.
• 1:51:07
  Take a whiff of this fucking fungi toenail. Oh, there's
• 1:51:11
  times I buff it out myself now because nobody will
• 1:51:13
  buff it out for me. Like, I can't take it
• 1:51:15
  to a Chinese woman. They'll lose their mind.
• 1:51:17
  Speaker 2: Can you put, like, anti-fungus cream.
• 1:51:18
  Speaker 1: On it or something? I put everything on it. It's
• 1:51:20
  too deep. This fungus runs deep. This is the fungus
• 1:51:24
  I brought back from Cuba. And it fucking pops up
• 1:51:27
  from time to time. I get under my tit. Like,
• 1:51:29
  it just, the fungus just grows. I don't know what
• 1:51:32
  I have to eat. Like, some days I eat something
• 1:51:34
  and it backfires. And I get all these fungus marks.
• 1:51:37
  I get all itchy and shit. I don't feel free. Right.
• 1:51:41
  But this bitch burnt that toe for six weeks, and
• 1:51:44
  every week I would ask her more creepy questions. She
• 1:51:47
  would have to take that mask off and smell that fungus. Dog,
• 1:51:51
  it was horrible. When she would walk out, she'd close
• 1:51:54
  the door. I was like, nope. And the thing never worked.
• 1:51:59
  She never burned me once, but she was serious with
• 1:52:01
  that blowtorch.
• 1:52:02
  Speaker 2: It didn't work?
• 1:52:03
  Speaker 1: No, it did nothing. I told you, the fungus is
• 1:52:05
  too deep. So to get rid of that, you have
• 1:52:08
  to do a liver test. To see how strong, because
• 1:52:10
  the zapping is fucking hard on your body. And it's
• 1:52:13
  really hard on your liver. So my liver didn't cut it.
• 1:52:16
  So they can't zap me with that medication.
• 1:52:18
  Speaker 2: Did you hear about that lady who had Alzheimer's? She
• 1:52:22
  couldn't talk anymore. They gave her five grams of psilocybin mushrooms.
• 1:52:26
  Speaker 1: And she's singing opera now.
• 1:52:28
  Speaker 2: All of a sudden she came back.
• 1:52:29
  Speaker 1: It's unbelievable. She started talking.
• 1:52:31
  Speaker 2: They said she hadn't talked in a long time. She
• 1:52:34
  could remember things.
• 1:52:36
  Speaker 1: I know for a fact I got a good buddy
• 1:52:38
  of mine that stuttered. That was his childhood thing. Every
• 1:52:41
  time he smoked crack, you should have seen that motherfucker,
• 1:52:43
  not a strut in there. He talks to you straight.
• 1:52:46
  Speaker 2: You know Paul Stamets, the mushroom expert? He's been on
• 1:52:48
  this podcast many times. He's a legitimate mycologist, like a scientist.
• 1:52:53
  He had a horrible stutter when he was a kid.
• 1:52:56
  Took 10 grams.
• 1:52:57
  Speaker 1: God. Gone. Gone. It's unreal. And people will still go, no, no.
• 1:53:01
  Mushrooms are deadly. They're going to kill you. Fuck you.
• 1:53:04
  Speaker 2: Isn't that crazy?
• 1:53:04
  Speaker 1: You need to see the devil every once in a
• 1:53:06
  while in your life. And that's what people don't. They
• 1:53:08
  don't see the downside. Because eating those mushrooms from time
• 1:53:11
  to time makes you step out like THC does and
• 1:53:13
  makes you look at yourself and make like a judgment
• 1:53:16
  call on what the fuck you're doing with your life.
• 1:53:18
  Speaker 2: What are you doing with your life? Are you chewing
• 1:53:19
  that fucking Zin and talking at the same time?
• 1:53:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I don't know. I don't have big enough fucking gums,
• 1:53:24
  I guess. I don't know. Don't stay there.
• 1:53:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's... The real problem is that it's illegal. You
• 1:53:29
  know what they should do with that? You know what
• 1:53:31
  they did with Colorado with 39% tax? Make mushrooms 100%.
• 1:53:35
  Tax it 100%. We'll still buy them. People will still
• 1:53:38
  buy them. Make it legal. Tax it 100%. You know
• 1:53:40
  how much fucking money they would generate? And I guarantee you, well,
• 1:53:46
  I was going to say people wouldn't be doing more mushrooms,
• 1:53:48
  but they definitely would.
• 1:53:48
  Speaker 1: But it would be good for everybody. Listen, the only
• 1:53:51
  thing that stalls people from mushrooms is the taste. Most
• 1:53:54
  people put it in the grinder and then they put
• 1:53:56
  it in capsules and they do it that way. All
• 1:53:58
  different things.
• 1:53:59
  Speaker 2: That should not be a hurdle in 2026.
• 1:54:00
  Speaker 1: When you told me you were going to get that
• 1:54:02
  property a couple of years ago, which you didn't get,
• 1:54:05
  I thought you were going to grow mushrooms out there.
• 1:54:07
  Like get somebody to set it up and Joe Rogan's mushrooms.
• 1:54:11
  I would never do that. With your fucking recipe.
• 1:54:13
  Speaker 2: No, that's not legal.
• 1:54:16
  Speaker 1: Not in Texas.
• 1:54:17
  Speaker 2: It's not legal federally. That's the problem. I mean this
• 1:54:20
  is part of what Trump is trying to change with
• 1:54:22
  this psychedelics act. So all that shit was made illegal
• 1:54:27
  in 1970. It was the Nixon administration, the Controlled Substances Act.
• 1:54:31
  If that hadn't happened in 1970, we would be living
• 1:54:35
  in a better world. Like legitimately, we would be living
• 1:54:38
  in a better world. You'd have way more people having
• 1:54:41
  access to this stuff, way more people that could get
• 1:54:43
  over whatever the fuck their hurdle is, whatever problem they have,
• 1:54:47
  whatever it is. It's not for everybody. There's a lot
• 1:54:50
  of people that shouldn't do it. There's a lot of
• 1:54:51
  people that are schizophrenic. And that they just need one
• 1:54:54
  mushroom trip and they're gone. One push. And they're never
• 1:54:57
  coming back. There's a lot of people that are hanging on.
• 1:54:59
  They're hanging on. And one edible, one mushroom trip, one
• 1:55:06
  meeting with the devil, and they never come back. That's true.
• 1:55:09
  But those people were already fucked. That's the problem. But
• 1:55:12
  for the rest of us, for the rest of the world,
• 1:55:14
  which is like most things, like some people eat a
• 1:55:18
  Brazil nut, they're dead, right? Some people eat peanuts and
• 1:55:21
  they're dead. They have a deadly allergy to peanuts. I
• 1:55:25
  could eat peanuts all day long.
• 1:55:26
  Speaker 1: Can you look up how many people diarrhea from fucking peanuts?
• 1:55:29
  It's quite a few. Come on.
• 1:55:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's quite a few. It's kind of shocking.
• 1:55:33
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 1:55:34
  Speaker 2: Well, here's the really crazy thing. A lot of people
• 1:55:37
  think it has to do with vaccines. They think this
• 1:55:40
  is Brett Weinstein's proposal. is that when you take that vaccine,
• 1:55:45
  so there's aluminum in the vaccine that's an irritant, right?
• 1:55:48
  And this is what fires up your immune system. And
• 1:55:50
  then there's the dead virus. So your body develops these antibodies.
• 1:55:53
  Speaker 1: Look at that. One to four annually.
• 1:55:55
  Speaker 2: That's a lot of people.
• 1:55:56
  Speaker 1: What?
• 1:55:56
  Speaker 2: That's a lot of people. No.
• 1:55:58
  Speaker 1: Four people?
• 1:55:59
  Speaker 2: Four whole people. What about in the world? How many
• 1:56:02
  people die? It's four in the world because none of
• 1:56:04
  them die anywhere else. Food allergies in general are responsible
• 1:56:07
  for about 100 deaths.
• 1:56:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah. This is all made-up white people shit.
• 1:56:13
  Speaker 2: Well, there's a few people, though, that just avoid the peanuts.
• 1:56:16
  But there are people that if they get peanuts, they'll die.
• 1:56:19
  Brett Weinstein thinks it has to do with eating peanuts
• 1:56:22
  right after you've been vaccinated and that something– I don't
• 1:56:25
  know if he's right. But something about your body reacting–
• 1:56:29
  this is the reason why your body creates this antibody
• 1:56:31
  to the dead virus that's in the vaccine. If you
• 1:56:35
  give someone whatever it is, any– figure out whatever the
• 1:56:37
  disease is. You have a dead virus and then you
• 1:56:40
  have this irritant. So the two of them together, your
• 1:56:44
  body reacts to this aluminum and it used to be–
• 1:56:51
  what is the other shit they don't put in it?
• 1:56:52
  There was mercury, ethylmercury and methylmercury, the two different types
• 1:56:57
  of mercury they've tried to do that in vaccines. But
• 1:56:59
  there's problems with that too obviously. Mercury is toxic. So
• 1:57:02
  is aluminum. But he thinks that if you have aluminum–
• 1:57:06
  from this vaccine and you're in contact with other things
• 1:57:09
  at the same time, you could develop an allergy for
• 1:57:12
  those things, whether it's wheat, gluten, whether it's animals, whatever
• 1:57:16
  it is. Like it's possible, he believes, to develop an
• 1:57:19
  allergy when you get vaccinated. And he thinks that's with
• 1:57:23
  the rise in vaccines and the rise in food allergies,
• 1:57:26
  he thinks those are connected.
• 1:57:27
  Speaker 1: Let me ask you this.
• 1:57:28
  Speaker 2: I don't know if he's right.
• 1:57:29
  Speaker 1: If you went to your grandfather in Newark, he's an
• 1:57:33
  immigrant and came over and You told me you had
• 1:57:35
  a peanut allergy. How many times were you smacking the
• 1:57:37
  fucking face?
• 1:57:39
  Speaker 2: Well, he wasn't a violent man.
• 1:57:40
  Speaker 1: He was a very kind man. Joe, what the fuck? Peanuts.
• 1:57:43
  Speaker 2: He would make fun of it.
• 1:57:44
  Speaker 1: I grew up on pine nuts every fucking day. Two
• 1:57:46
  pine nuts. I was allergic to maple syrup.
• 1:57:49
  Speaker 2: Well, the idea of being allergic to bread back then
• 1:57:51
  was preposterous. First of all, he would get bread like
• 1:57:54
  every two days. They would go down to the local
• 1:57:57
  Italian bakery and buy Italian bread. It's the only bread
• 1:58:00
  everybody ate in the house. It's so funny. I didn't
• 1:58:03
  even appreciate it back then. Like when I'd have a
• 1:58:05
  peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'd be like, why are
• 1:58:07
  they giving it to me on this bullshit thick bread?
• 1:58:09
  Because you got to cut the bread.
• 1:58:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:58:10
  Speaker 2: You know? I'd be like, give me some fucking white
• 1:58:12
  bread like a real person. Well, some Wonder Bread. That's
• 1:58:15
  what I wanted. When you're a kid, you want Wonder Bread.
• 1:58:17
  Speaker 1: I love Wonder Bread.
• 1:58:17
  Speaker 2: Peanut butter and jelly sandwich on a– like, I'd get
• 1:58:19
  whole wheat. I'd be like, what is this horse shit?
• 1:58:22
  Speaker 1: I think you'd be in prison.
• 1:58:22
  Speaker 2: What is this terrible fucking shitty bran-filled wheat with all
• 1:58:27
  the fucking– chunks of wheat that's in it. Get the
• 1:58:31
  fuck out of here with your whole wheat bread. I
• 1:58:33
  hated it. Now I love it. Now it's the only, like,
• 1:58:36
  if I see, like, regular white bread, I'm like, ugh,
• 1:58:37
  I've never eaten that.
• 1:58:38
  Speaker 1: Let me ask you this. That bread that your grandfather
• 1:58:40
  was getting. Yeah. In Hoboken, in Newark.
• 1:58:43
  Speaker 2: Newark, yeah.
• 1:58:43
  Speaker 1: Two blocks away. They were old school Italian people. Yep.
• 1:58:46
  They made everything in the 70s and 60s without all
• 1:58:48
  the shit that's in now.
• 1:58:49
  Speaker 2: I remember the bags.
• 1:58:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah. White paper bags. White paper bags.
• 1:58:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And the fresh Italian bread.
• 1:58:54
  Speaker 1: And the bread tasted great. Oh, it was phenomenal. It
• 1:58:55
  was fucking great. With a piece of butter.
• 1:58:57
  Speaker 2: With pasta when you dip it in the pasta sauce.
• 1:58:58
  Speaker 1: Oh, and the red sauce. You go fucking crazy. Oh,
• 1:58:59
  my God.
• 1:59:00
  Speaker 2: It was so good. With butter. You put butter on
• 1:59:02
  that bread and you dip it in that pasta sauce.
• 1:59:04
  Holy shit.
• 1:59:04
  Speaker 1: Don't have to stop eating munchers. All right. That's my
• 1:59:08
  favorite dish. Mussels with spicy, with medium. Yeah, because you
• 1:59:12
  need a loaf of bread. My body can't fucking do
• 1:59:14
  that no more.
• 1:59:14
  Speaker 2: Especially with the red sauce.
• 1:59:16
  Speaker 1: Oh, need a loaf of bread.
• 1:59:18
  Speaker 2: Oh, go through the whole loaf.
• 1:59:19
  Speaker 1: With the butter, with the olive oil on the bread.
• 1:59:21
  You need all that shit. I said, I can't eat
• 1:59:23
  mussels no more. I love mussels. I go to Rudy's.
• 1:59:26
  I got some mussels. They're big. They look like a
• 1:59:28
  fucking chick. Looks like a six-foot woman's clit. They're that
• 1:59:33
  fucking big, the mussels. You think I'm kidding you. These
• 1:59:36
  fucking clit mussels. When I go to other restaurants, you
• 1:59:39
  get those little mussels. Then you get a couple big ones. No, no, no.
• 1:59:41
  They give you nine big chick gorilla raised fucking pussy clits.
• 1:59:47
  And they're huge. And they put a little sauce on it.
• 1:59:50
  So good. It makes me go fucking.
• 1:59:53
  Speaker 2: There was a Thai place that I used to go
• 1:59:55
  to in LA.
• 1:59:57
  Speaker 1: Thai food.
• 1:59:57
  Speaker 2: And they had mussels and big fucking spicy mussels. They
• 2:00:00
  were huge.
• 2:00:01
  Speaker 1: So good. Oh. Not the Thai place Eddie took me to.
• 2:00:05
  The one next to the fucking 10th planet on La Brea. Oh, yeah.
• 2:00:10
  I went in there with Eddie one night and I
• 2:00:11
  already hate Thai food. Eddie, come on. I'll buy you lunch.
• 2:00:14
  I'm broke.
• 2:00:15
  Speaker 2: You don't like Thai food?
• 2:00:16
  Speaker 1: I went in there and there was ants on the wall.
• 2:00:19
  I'm like, what the fuck? But I like the one
• 2:00:22
  that you took your shoes off. They had the best
• 2:00:25
  shrimp pate in the country.
• 2:00:26
  Speaker 2: You took your shoes off?
• 2:00:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's one on Sunset right across from the comic
• 2:00:29
  book store.
• 2:00:31
  Speaker 2: Toy?
• 2:00:31
  Speaker 1: Toy.
• 2:00:32
  Speaker 2: Oh, Toy Time.
• 2:00:33
  Speaker 1: Toy Time, yeah.
• 2:00:33
  Speaker 2: Oh, that place is legit.
• 2:00:34
  Speaker 1: Solid place. Very good place. The best place ever was,
• 2:00:37
  what's the place next to the Laugh Factory?
• 2:00:41
  Speaker 2: Green Blast Deli?
• 2:00:41
  Speaker 1: Green Blast Deli.
• 2:00:42
  Speaker 2: Oh, that was a great joint.
• 2:00:44
  Speaker 1: Until I tell you this story. I'm in there with
• 2:00:45
  Ralphie May one day, and he gets a roast beef sandwich.
• 2:00:49
  And he's eating the roast beef, and I could see
• 2:00:51
  the ants on his arm. And he opens it up,
• 2:00:54
  and there's ants all over the sandwich. Listen to me.
• 2:00:56
  Call the waiter. The waiter's still charging for half the sandwich.
• 2:00:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah. That's hilarious.
• 2:01:01
  Speaker 1: He's like, I ain't paying shit. This motherfucker had ants
• 2:01:04
  on it. I didn't even eat the other one. The
• 2:01:06
  ants were on his fucking arm, Joe.
• 2:01:09
  Speaker 2: They weren't in the sandwich?
• 2:01:10
  Speaker 1: They were on his arm? They were in the sandwich, too.
• 2:01:12
  Speaker 2: Oh, so it was just all over the place.
• 2:01:13
  Speaker 1: It was all over the place.
• 2:01:14
  Speaker 2: Greenblatt's?
• 2:01:15
  Speaker 1: Greenblatt's, which I'll still eat. I don't even think it's them.
• 2:01:18
  What year was that?
• 2:01:20
  Speaker 2: I only ate there a few times, which is weird
• 2:01:22
  because it was right next door to the Laugh Factory.
• 2:01:25
  Speaker 1: It was good too.
• 2:01:26
  Speaker 2: I kind of stopped going to the Laugh Factory after
• 2:01:29
  a certain point. It was a certain point in like
• 2:01:31
  the 2000s where I'm like, I think I'm done with
• 2:01:33
  this place. And I was mostly at the store.
• 2:01:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I like the Laugh Factory. I like the improv.
• 2:01:38
  Speaker 2: I was like at the store. I love the improv still.
• 2:01:40
  I always did the improv still. But the Laugh Factory
• 2:01:43
  to me was like– there was something about it that
• 2:01:45
  was like sterile. There was something about it. Not a
• 2:01:47
  bad thing, but it was like very much like a
• 2:01:49
  lot of people– Got TV deals out of.
• 2:01:52
  Speaker 1: The Laugh Factory. That was the big thing about the
• 2:01:54
  Laugh Factory.
• 2:01:54
  Speaker 2: Different kind of comedy.
• 2:01:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:01:56
  Speaker 2: You know, it was, the store was the dream. You know,
• 2:02:00
  the Laugh Factory was nice and everything. But then it
• 2:02:03
  was also like, remember Scott Day? He would discourage, he
• 2:02:06
  would try to discourage you from going to the Laugh Factory.
• 2:02:07
  He's like, you're a comedy store comic.
• 2:02:09
  Speaker 1: You're not a Laugh Factory comic.
• 2:02:10
  Speaker 2: I'm like, listen, man, I got to go up everywhere.
• 2:02:12
  I can't, I'm developing. I can't be just limiting myself
• 2:02:16
  to one place.
• 2:02:16
  Speaker 1: But after a while, you're like, I develop better at
• 2:02:18
  the store.
• 2:02:19
  Speaker 2: Well, the thing about the store, too, you got three
• 2:02:21
  totally different environments. You got the belly room environment, which
• 2:02:24
  is like very intimate, very small, 70 people. And then
• 2:02:28
  you got the OR, which is the gritty. That's the
• 2:02:32
  psychopaths at 1130 on a fucking Tuesday night. And then
• 2:02:36
  you got the main room, which is the big show.
• 2:02:38
  There was so much opportunity.
• 2:02:39
  Speaker 1: I fucking always hated the main room until the last
• 2:02:41
  five years I was there. I just couldn't get the
• 2:02:44
  formula for it. But the original room, I knew it like... Everything.
• 2:02:48
  Speaker 2: The original room, you're locked into a living room.
• 2:02:51
  Speaker 1: You're locked into it. And then the piano and the
• 2:02:53
  whole fucking thing.
• 2:02:55
  Speaker 2: The main room was big. Big stage, big crowd. It
• 2:02:58
  was big ceiling. Everything was big. It was different. It
• 2:03:01
  was a different kind of a show.
• 2:03:03
  Speaker 1: Remember the first time I showcased for Jamie? He's like, man,
• 2:03:05
  what are you doing here? You belong in Las Vegas, man,
• 2:03:09
  in a showroom. You're not an L.A. comic.
• 2:03:12
  Speaker 2: That's hilarious. Jamie always had the craziest ideas for people.
• 2:03:16
  Speaker 1: But at the end, he was a really good guy.
• 2:03:18
  At the end of the day, he really tried hard. Well,
• 2:03:21
  he loved comedy. Yeah, he loved comedy.
• 2:03:22
  Speaker 2: He really did love comedy.
• 2:03:22
  Speaker 1: All those people were very nice. You know, I just
• 2:03:24
  went to Nashville for the comedy festival.
• 2:03:26
  Speaker 2: Uh-huh.
• 2:03:27
  Speaker 1: And I ended up doing the old Opry. You know
• 2:03:29
  that theater there? What's the name of the theater? Randall Opry? Yeah.
• 2:03:33
  And it was great. But the great thing about that,
• 2:03:35
  that everybody from the improv was there last night. I
• 2:03:37
  saw people that were there for 25 years. And we
• 2:03:41
  just were dropping stories. Aaron, the guy Hartman. Hartman looks great.
• 2:03:46
  He's a big peptide guy, big everything guy. He lives
• 2:03:49
  in Nashville. Joel from Florida. Oh. You know, and you
• 2:03:55
  get to see those guys, and you're like, wow, we've
• 2:03:57
  been in this shit together. Forever. Like, I told Aaron.
• 2:04:00
  I met Aaron in Irvine. Then she came to Hollywood,
• 2:04:04
  and I was like, psych, because she gave us an
• 2:04:06
  11 o'clock show. And she was pregnant. She was hot.
• 2:04:09
  She used to wear the farmer, those things.
• 2:04:12
  Speaker 2: The overalls?
• 2:04:12
  Speaker 1: The overalls. Oh, yeah. She was so hot. I still
• 2:04:16
  tell her when I talk to her. I always tell her, Aaron,
• 2:04:18
  you sexy savage. I always fucking torment her. But it
• 2:04:22
  was really nice to see them. And, you know, Hartman
• 2:04:26
  and me told the story when I told him I
• 2:04:28
  was going to bang his head off the wall. You know,
• 2:04:30
  just craziness. Look at us now. We're all in there
• 2:04:35
  having a great time. 20 years ago, we were always
• 2:04:37
  at war with one of you guys. We cursed too much.
• 2:04:41
  You know, we were talking about when I got fired
• 2:04:42
  with Pablo. Yeah. And then he found out I wasn't
• 2:04:45
  doing coke, and he felt really bad, you know. So
• 2:04:48
  it was just great to see what we've been through together.
• 2:04:52
  And now, after everything, you're like, fuck. I was there
• 2:04:54
  the fucking night Joel started.
• 2:04:56
  Speaker 2: That was in Miami, right?
• 2:04:58
  Speaker 1: That was in Miami, 98. Yeah. New Year's of 99.
• 2:05:01
  That's crazy. And Madonna came in with Chris fucking Rock. Wow.
• 2:05:07
  And to watch somebody New Year's Eve, I forget who
• 2:05:09
  the fuck it was. But, yeah, you look at those people,
• 2:05:13
  you're like, we took the ride. We were kids. We
• 2:05:15
  were fucking kids together.
• 2:05:16
  Speaker 2: And also you have to think, like, imagine having to
• 2:05:20
  employ you. Imagine being a businessman and you've got to
• 2:05:24
  employ you in 98. God bless him.
• 2:05:28
  Speaker 1: Not good.
• 2:05:29
  Speaker 2: God bless him.
• 2:05:31
  Speaker 1: I remember the improv really liked me, and I fucked
• 2:05:33
  them over in like 2007.
• 2:05:34
  Speaker 2: Who was the guy, the original guy at Coconut Grove?
• 2:05:39
  The guy who liked to party.
• 2:05:40
  Speaker 1: I forget his name now. Rich Jeff. Give me a minute. Yeah.
• 2:05:45
  Give me a minute.
• 2:05:46
  Speaker 2: The original guy.
• 2:05:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, crazy. He was fun. Crazy. Fun guy. Really fun.
• 2:05:50
  He's from Cleveland. He lived in Cleveland.
• 2:05:52
  Speaker 2: Liked to party.
• 2:05:52
  Speaker 1: And his wife hit the lottery for a million.
• 2:05:55
  Speaker 2: People didn't realize how nutty Coconut Grove was. That was
• 2:05:58
  the nuttiest improv. That ain't a problem. We would go
• 2:06:01
  out afterwards and have Cuban coffee and eat Cuban sandwiches
• 2:06:04
  at like 2 o'clock in the morning.
• 2:06:05
  Speaker 1: Everything was open. We used to go to that newsstand.
• 2:06:07
  The newsstand.
• 2:06:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 2:06:08
  Speaker 1: It was open until 5 and it closed for an hour.
• 2:06:10
  Speaker 2: We'd always eat and tell stories.
• 2:06:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And you could drink all night. Oh, yeah. So
• 2:06:15
  they closed from 5 to 6. But whatever booze you
• 2:06:18
  had on the table, you could keep. So you would say,
• 2:06:21
  give me like eight beers. And then they would open
• 2:06:23
  up again at 6 and you're right there. Hey!
• 2:06:26
  Speaker 2: They closed for one hour.
• 2:06:27
  Speaker 1: Oh, God.
• 2:06:28
  Speaker 2: At 5 in the morning.
• 2:06:30
  Speaker 1: I remember one night you were on Conan O'Brien. This
• 2:06:34
  is 97, right? No. You did Somebody's Late Show. Okay.
• 2:06:39
  It was the week that our friend got shot. Oh,
• 2:06:42
  that Hartman thing? Hartman thing. You can't believe I remember. See,
• 2:06:45
  I'm just telling you that I don't know shit. Look
• 2:06:47
  up the dates. When Hartman got shot, you were on
• 2:06:50
  that show. You were with me all weekend, and I stayed,
• 2:06:54
  and then you went to New York to shoot that,
• 2:06:56
  and then that weekend Hartman, you know. But I'll never forget,
• 2:07:00
  I was involved in the threesome when you were on
• 2:07:03
  that talk show. And it's a chubby chick and a
• 2:07:06
  hot chick and we're snorting coke. And I'm trying to
• 2:07:09
  eat ass and I'm looking at you. I go, pull
• 2:07:11
  on NBC. So I go, watch show. And I'm watching
• 2:07:13
  you as I'm trying to tackle these two animals. And
• 2:07:16
  I'm like, who the fuck is going to believe this?
• 2:07:20
  Chubby chick got up. She's like, you didn't want to
• 2:07:22
  be with me anyway. You always wanted the hot chick
• 2:07:24
  and slammed the door. It was a full night. It
• 2:07:26
  was a full night talk.
• 2:07:29
  Speaker 2: Cocaine.
• 2:07:32
  Speaker 1: But all that shit, you see these people now and
• 2:07:34
  you're like, bro, we all went through it together. Yeah.
• 2:07:37
  We all went through it together. What a great fucking
• 2:07:40
  thing to have at this time in your life that
• 2:07:42
  we all, we're all here. You know? Fucking really nice, man.
• 2:07:47
  It makes you go, wow, this comedy life was worth
• 2:07:50
  every fucking penny. I got into it.
• 2:07:52
  Speaker 2: It's a fun ride when you look back and you think, like,
• 2:07:55
  imagine when you were first starting out, imagine that it
• 2:07:58
  would turn out this way. You never imagined it. And
• 2:08:02
  then you look back, what a fun ride. What an
• 2:08:04
  extraordinarily fun life.
• 2:08:07
  Speaker 1: I'll never forget. And you had it pinned down from
• 2:08:09
  the beginning. I never even told you this. I got
• 2:08:13
  to L.A. like January of 97, and that summer, like August, Nope.
• 2:08:21
  Speaker 2: No, that's Cleveland Improv. I know it's the one in Miami, too. Oh, no,
• 2:08:25
  it was the manager. No worries, though. Thank you, though.
• 2:08:29
  Speaker 1: What were we talking.
• 2:08:31
  Speaker 2: About? Something pinned down. Manager.
• 2:08:34
  Speaker 1: Who the fuck knows?
• 2:08:36
  Speaker 2: We were talking about....
• 2:08:41
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 2:08:42
  Speaker 2: Never imagining. Looking back on this life.
• 2:08:45
  Speaker 1: Like.
• 2:08:46
  Speaker 2: When you first started, you would never imagine it would
• 2:08:48
  turn out this way.
• 2:08:49
  Speaker 1: You said something about me once that was right. I
• 2:08:52
  wasn't on the podcast, but you were talking to somebody.
• 2:08:54
  I remember when that guy first came on the scene.
• 2:08:56
  He was scary. He had a leather jacket and all
• 2:08:58
  this shit, and he was buck wild. I just got
• 2:09:02
  to L.A., and I do a couple spots. The guys
• 2:09:05
  at my first talent coordinator at the improv said to me, hey,
• 2:09:09
  would you like to work Irvine? And I go, yeah.
• 2:09:11
  He goes, I got an MC spot. Go do it
• 2:09:13
  next week. My first time ever. I go down there,
• 2:09:16
  and I had a crazy girlfriend then with all the teeth. Oh, yeah.
• 2:09:19
  And this motherfucking head chef comes up to me and her,
• 2:09:22
  and he goes, hey, she's got the same mouth as
• 2:09:25
  Gina Davis, the nice cocksucker mouth. That was my first
• 2:09:29
  weekend ever. And at first, I took it kind of weird,
• 2:09:32
  and then after the show, I went up to him,
• 2:09:35
  and I go, hey, man, What the fuck do you
• 2:09:37
  think you are saying? Something like that. He goes, what
• 2:09:39
  are you doing? If you go at me, you'll never
• 2:09:41
  work on improv again. I just kicked him in the
• 2:09:43
  fucking stomach as hard as I could. They called me
• 2:09:45
  the next day. Joey, come on, man. I kicked him.
• 2:09:47
  The guy fell apart. All of a sudden, he wasn't
• 2:09:49
  a tough guy no more. I was just so pissed.
• 2:09:51
  How can you say that to somebody's fucking girlfriend, to
• 2:09:53
  her face? I just fucking front kicked him. And I
• 2:09:56
  hit him somewhere in the stomach. He was holding on.
• 2:09:58
  I'm calling Hartman. Call fucking Hartman. I don't give a fuck.
• 2:10:03
  I remember getting in the car going, Joey, you can't
• 2:10:04
  let the old Joey get in the way, man. This
• 2:10:07
  is not good. You should have just walked away.
• 2:10:08
  Speaker 2: But no.
• 2:10:09
  Speaker 1: Why would I walk away? Fuck that shit. That was
• 2:10:12
  the problem. A lot of people would walk away from
• 2:10:14
  that shit, and you just lost. You just became a
• 2:10:16
  Hollywood asshole. When you say fuck you, they'll respect you
• 2:10:20
  fucking more a year later. And they did. They ended
• 2:10:21
  up giving me more work.
• 2:10:22
  Speaker 2: Was that guy still there when you went back?
• 2:10:24
  Speaker 1: No. He was like a cute cook that thought he
• 2:10:27
  was cute. Orange County, he wasn't going to get smacked.
• 2:10:30
  I don't give a fuck who you are. I fucking
• 2:10:32
  kicked that motherfucker. I didn't give a fuck, Jack. I
• 2:10:35
  was so buck wild at the store in the beginning
• 2:10:38
  when I hit the kid in the head with the microphone.
• 2:10:41
  And then they came and got me in La Jolla.
• 2:10:43
  And I took the pool. Remember they had that pool
• 2:10:46
  table in La Jolla, the bumper? They had a bumper
• 2:10:49
  pool table in La Jolla. So these guys kept threatening
• 2:10:52
  me that they were going to come game. So I
• 2:10:54
  became fucking Chuck Norris and called it silence. I took
• 2:10:59
  all the pool balls and I put them in different
• 2:11:01
  places so I had to throw them at him as
• 2:11:04
  a weapon. Then I hit all the fucking pool cues.
• 2:11:06
  You ever see Call of Silence? Then Seagal stole it
• 2:11:10
  from him in that fucking Bobby Lupo movie. But that
• 2:11:13
  was Chuck Norris when he would fill a bag with
• 2:11:16
  pool cues and hit you in the head with it
• 2:11:18
  and shit in the pool hall with the Colombians. Dog,
• 2:11:21
  and that motherfucker, I saw them. I was sitting outside
• 2:11:24
  the La Jolla Stormer. They had that little bench. facing
• 2:11:27
  the Chinese restaurant. He don't even remember La Jolla no more.
• 2:11:30
  And I saw them at the light, and they made
• 2:11:32
  the turn, and I took one of those balls, and
• 2:11:34
  I kept it right here, and they pulled up and
• 2:11:37
  took water pistols out. And I fucking took that ball
• 2:11:41
  and threw it with everything I had. It hit that car,
• 2:11:44
  and all of a sudden, the fucking car went boom.
• 2:11:47
  These motherfuckers took off, Jack.
• 2:11:50
  Speaker 2: Code of silence. I remember this because this was like
• 2:11:52
  the first real movie movie that like got respected by
• 2:11:57
  it wasn't just a karate movie it was a movie
• 2:12:00
  that was about like an undercover cop movie right wasn't
• 2:12:04
  it against the Colombians but it was the fighting part
• 2:12:07
  was just part of it it wasn't that it was
• 2:12:10
  you know it was just a karate movie like most
• 2:12:12
  of his other movies were just karate movies or you
• 2:12:15
  know they were kind of campy like missing in action
• 2:12:18
  it was a lot of it based on the karate
• 2:12:20
  this was oh we got hit by the pool ball
• 2:12:24
  oh they jump him This is a terrible movie.
• 2:12:27
  Speaker 1: This is terrible.
• 2:12:30
  Speaker 2: It was the shit back then. So when you watch
• 2:12:33
  it now, you're like, this is the corniest fight scene
• 2:12:35
  of all time. These guys would overwhelm him.
• 2:12:38
  Speaker 1: Listen, man. Good men wear black. Chuck Norris had a
• 2:12:45
  couple movies where he showed his shit. This was not
• 2:12:48
  one of them. Walker, Sheriff Marshall was not one of them, okay?
• 2:12:53
  With the wig doing push-ups still on Channel 89. That
• 2:12:57
  wasn't him. I love Chuck Norris, but Chuck Norris made
• 2:12:59
  some good movies early on that were dark. That's why
• 2:13:02
  nobody talks about good men wearing black. What's the other one?
• 2:13:04
  The Octagon.
• 2:13:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
• 2:13:06
  Speaker 1: You forget about all those. Oh, yeah.
• 2:13:08
  Speaker 2: Is this good men, good guys wear black? 1978.
• 2:13:11
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 2:13:14
  Speaker 2: How many fucking people did this guy get into martial arts? Like,
• 2:13:18
  how many people... Because of Chuck Norris movies wind up
• 2:13:21
  doing martial arts a fucking shitload.
• 2:13:25
  Speaker 1: I got into Tang Soo Do because of him. Because
• 2:13:28
  he was one of the first Tang Soo Do guys
• 2:13:30
  and he split. He made his own thing or whatever
• 2:13:34
  the fuck.
• 2:13:36
  Speaker 2: It's kind of amazing when you think about how many
• 2:13:38
  karate guys didn't make it. Like how many guys didn't
• 2:13:43
  become karate movie stars and Chuck Norris did? Like, how
• 2:13:47
  many of them were there? How many karate guys wanted
• 2:13:49
  to be movie stars and couldn't figure it out? And
• 2:13:51
  he did.
• 2:13:52
  Speaker 1: I saw every martial arts film made in the 70s.
• 2:13:55
  Even with the black exploitation, the movie was called Three
• 2:13:58
  the Hard Way. Jim Brown, Jim Kelly, and the other
• 2:14:02
  really good black- You forget about Jim Kelly. Jim Kelly
• 2:14:06
  was trying to break into that thing.
• 2:14:07
  Speaker 2: There was a lot of guys. He did a bunch
• 2:14:08
  of movies.
• 2:14:09
  Speaker 1: And then after Bruce Lee died, the whole thing opened up. Yeah,
• 2:14:13
  Jet Lai, Jet Lu.
• 2:14:14
  Speaker 2: Bruce Lai.
• 2:14:15
  Speaker 1: Bruce Lai. You had all these fucking Bruces. And that
• 2:14:18
  was the end of it. But I was notorious. I
• 2:14:21
  wanted to see all those fucking movies growing up. Billy Jack.
• 2:14:27
  You don't remember Billy Jack?
• 2:14:27
  Speaker 2: I remember Billy Jack.
• 2:14:29
  Speaker 1: The Indian?
• 2:14:29
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, I remember. I remember the black hat. I
• 2:14:31
  remember the whole deal. I'm going to put this foot.
• 2:14:33
  Speaker 1: On the side of your face. On that side of
• 2:14:34
  your face, all that shit.
• 2:14:35
  Speaker 2: It's not a damn thing you can.
• 2:14:36
  Speaker 1: Do about it. They even had a white Mormon dude
• 2:14:37
  be a marshal. Everybody, Chinese, black, everybody played fucking Kung Fu. Everybody.
• 2:14:43
  And that movie, Code of Silence, is Dennis Farina's, one
• 2:14:47
  of his first movies.
• 2:14:48
  Speaker 2: Oh, really?
• 2:14:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's the sidekick in that movie. Oh. Fucking, you just,
• 2:14:53
  you know, people forget how many kung fu movies or
• 2:14:56
  martial art based movies they actually made in the 70s.
• 2:15:00
  Fucking unreal. Oh, yeah, unreal. And the shit that was
• 2:15:02
  getting sent here from China, it's like kid porn. They
• 2:15:05
  were just sending it every weekend. Fucking Chinese people beating
• 2:15:09
  up on Chinese people, jumping. Remember the more they got older,
• 2:15:12
  like by 70s, Bruce died in 73. By 76, there
• 2:15:16
  was movies that the guy had like a thing of gold.
• 2:15:18
  It weighed like two tons, and he would throw it
• 2:15:20
  up a hill and then jump and catch it on
• 2:15:22
  top of the hill. Come on, now you lost me.
• 2:15:25
  The one-armed swordsman, you lost me. You know, the guy's
• 2:15:27
  got one arm and he's fighting.
• 2:15:29
  Speaker 2: Some dudes love those kung fu movies.
• 2:15:31
  Speaker 1: They were completely ridiculous. And forget about black people. Like,
• 2:15:34
  you know, when people talk about Bruce Lee, it was
• 2:15:37
  a sensational cultural fucking phenomenon when he came. And the
• 2:15:42
  people that, think about all the people he opened up
• 2:15:45
  to martial art movies and martial arts in general. I mean,
• 2:15:48
  Chuck Norris was the second half of it. You know,
• 2:15:50
  Bruce was the first. Chuck Norris was the second. And
• 2:15:53
  I hate to admit it, UFC is the third big
• 2:15:56
  wave of that. You know, nobody goes to karate no more. Okay?
• 2:16:01
  How many karate schools you got? It's the kids, 10.
• 2:16:04
  They make them hit a paper.
• 2:16:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they're going to jiu-jitsu schools now.
• 2:16:08
  Speaker 1: They're going to all different schools. So it's changed. The
• 2:16:11
  culture has changed. You know, in 73, everybody went to
• 2:16:14
  Wing Chun Kung Fu. Yep. You taught judo. You became
• 2:16:17
  a Wing Chun dude now because you weren't going to
• 2:16:19
  make no money off judo. Nobody was doing judo back then.
• 2:16:23
  You had to go to Brooklyn to get Savate classes.
• 2:16:25
  Remember Savate? Yeah. The French. Yeah. You had to go
• 2:16:29
  to Brooklyn. In those days, New York had everything. But
• 2:16:32
  then when, like, our friend, the one who does the
• 2:16:34
  MMA podcast with you, Matt Serra. When Matt Serra got
• 2:16:37
  into jiu-jitsu, he would have to go from Long Island
• 2:16:41
  all the way to, like, close to Philadelphia. Yeah. It'd
• 2:16:44
  be three hours on Sundays. Jiu-jitsu wasn't everywhere yet. When
• 2:16:49
  he got into it, he would have to travel. I
• 2:16:51
  think he told the story on one of these podcasts.
• 2:16:53
  He would have to drive to Jersey just on Sundays.
• 2:16:56
  They just did jiu-jitsu on Sundays because that's all that
• 2:16:59
  was available. Now you got a jiu-jitsu school on every
• 2:17:02
  fucking corner. Who's that because of? That's because of the UFC, man.
• 2:17:06
  It just blew it the fuck right open. So who knows?
• 2:17:10
  I may be wrong.
• 2:17:11
  Speaker 2: No, I think you're right. For sure, the UFC opened
• 2:17:14
  up to Brazilian jiu-jitsu. Hoist Gracie. Hoist Gracie winning the
• 2:17:17
  first UFCs, that opened up Brazilian jiu-jitsu all over the country.
• 2:17:21
  Speaker 1: Saying, what the fuck is this?
• 2:17:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was a completely new— I mean, there was no
• 2:17:24
  Brazilian jiu-jitsu in America. You never even talked about it.
• 2:17:26
  I did martial arts my whole life. I've never even
• 2:17:28
  heard of it.
• 2:17:29
  Speaker 1: You heard of it, but— I don't even know if
• 2:17:31
  I did. It was so far off to you.
• 2:17:32
  Speaker 2: I barely even paid attention to it. It was like
• 2:17:35
  it could have been anything. And then all of a
• 2:17:36
  sudden the UFC came along, and it's like, oh, my God,
• 2:17:38
  that's the thing that everybody needs to learn. That's what's
• 2:17:41
  wild now. It's like how many people trained martial arts
• 2:17:44
  in comparison to like 50 years ago? There's no comparison.
• 2:17:48
  There's way more people that know how to do it.
• 2:17:50
  how to fight now than like ever before, than ever before.
• 2:17:54
  Speaker 1: Or at least they know how to neutralize somebody.
• 2:17:58
  Speaker 2: Well, a lot of people are training now.
• 2:18:00
  Speaker 1: There's way more schools now. People learn to neutralize people.
• 2:18:03
  Anybody who studies jiu-jitsu ain't going to bully you. They're
• 2:18:06
  going to neutralize you on the street. What are you
• 2:18:09
  going to do, break your fucking shoulder on the street?
• 2:18:11
  They're trying to neutralize you, hold you down. Hey, take
• 2:18:14
  a breath. Relax. Don't swing at me because I'll break
• 2:18:17
  this fucking arm.
• 2:18:18
  Speaker 2: Did you ever see the video of Matt Serra? I
• 2:18:20
  think it was in Atlantic City. It might have been Vegas.
• 2:18:23
  Somewhere in a casino. Some drunk guy is causing problems,
• 2:18:27
  and Matt winds up taking him down and mounting him
• 2:18:29
  until the cops come. He's just holding on to the guy.
• 2:18:31
  He's just sitting on the guy, holding on. There it is.
• 2:18:34
  The guy's swinging. Look at Matt. You've got a literal...
• 2:18:37
  Brazilian jiu-jitsu world champion, and he's just mounting you laughing. Like,
• 2:18:43
  you think about picking on the wrong guy. He's just
• 2:18:46
  holding on. I mean, the guy's completely helpless. I don't
• 2:18:51
  remember the whole story behind this. Look at the security
• 2:18:53
  guard coming. I was like, relax, I got this guy.
• 2:18:55
  Speaker 1: Now, you and I both know Matt could knee him,
• 2:18:57
  kick him in the face, and get up and leave.
• 2:18:59
  Speaker 2: He could literally kill him.
• 2:18:59
  Speaker 1: This is what I'm telling you. The jiu-jitsu... That atmosphere
• 2:19:02
  doesn't teach you to do that. It just holds you
• 2:19:04
  down going, hey.
• 2:19:05
  Speaker 2: Well, he's not going to prove.
• 2:19:07
  Speaker 1: No. Catch your breath, bro.
• 2:19:07
  Speaker 2: He's laughing. He's a world champion. I mean, I don't
• 2:19:10
  know if he had been the UFC champion by that time, but,
• 2:19:13
  you know.
• 2:19:13
  Speaker 1: What are you going to do, come over to somebody
• 2:19:14
  on the street and break their shoulder? Now you have
• 2:19:16
  to live.
• 2:19:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're going to go to jail.
• 2:19:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're going to get sued. You lose everything. I
• 2:19:20
  know jujitsu people. They get down like they're bouncers. Yeah.
• 2:19:23
  They just neutralize you.
• 2:19:24
  Speaker 2: It was the night before his Hall of Fame induction
• 2:19:26
  to the UFC.
• 2:19:26
  Speaker 1: 2018.
• 2:19:30
  Speaker 2: Okay, so that's way past the time that he won
• 2:19:32
  the title. Yeah, that's hilarious. That's very funny. That poor guy. Imagine, like,
• 2:19:37
  knowing that guy could have killed you and he was
• 2:19:39
  just so nice. All he did was hold your wrist
• 2:19:41
  and sit on your chest for a little while. And
• 2:19:42
  look at him.
• 2:19:43
  Speaker 1: He looked like he was on a boat having a
• 2:19:44
  good time. He was like, hey, somebody get me a
• 2:19:46
  water or something.
• 2:19:47
  Speaker 2: The guy is literally helpless. He has no fear whatsoever
• 2:19:50
  of that guy hurting him. You know, it's like a child.
• 2:19:54
  It's like your little child is having a temper tantrum. Like,
• 2:19:57
  come on. It's Matt Serra.
• 2:19:59
  Speaker 1: It's funny.
• 2:20:00
  Speaker 2: There's so many dummies out there. This is part of
• 2:20:02
  the problem in this world. It's hard to get your
• 2:20:04
  shit together. So many people just stumble through life just
• 2:20:07
  never getting their shit together.
• 2:20:08
  Speaker 1: I was talking to my friend last night. She has, like,
• 2:20:11
  a cooking show on YouTube. She goes, I had a
• 2:20:15
  stump doing it, Joey. She goes, my mother would watch,
• 2:20:19
  and these people would say, like, the weirdest, like, you know, everything,
• 2:20:23
  show me your tits, show me your pussy, you can't cook, bitch.
• 2:20:27
  And you're like... You know, how much longer am I
• 2:20:30
  going to take this shit for?
• 2:20:31
  Speaker 2: People are so horrible.
• 2:20:32
  Speaker 1: They're fucking horrible on the internet. You know, she's a
• 2:20:34
  young girl looking good. She's like, Joey, I had to
• 2:20:37
  cancel the fucking thing. She was doing like a workout,
• 2:20:40
  a cooking thing. She goes, no, I just play with
• 2:20:42
  my cats. That's it. And people love cats. She goes,
• 2:20:45
  that's it. But it's impossible.
• 2:20:48
  Speaker 2: There's so many animals out there.
• 2:20:50
  Speaker 1: And they're out there and they don't give a fuck
• 2:20:51
  and they say shit.
• 2:20:53
  Speaker 2: It's also there's zero consequences for saying horrible shit. And
• 2:20:57
  they're trying to get a rise out of the other
• 2:20:58
  people in the comments too. So they're trying to say
• 2:21:00
  outrageous shit so that other people react to it, so
• 2:21:03
  that you'll read it and you'll react to it.
• 2:21:05
  Speaker 1: It's the dumbest fucking thing ever. It is.
• 2:21:09
  Speaker 2: I was thinking this last night. It's kind of a
• 2:21:12
  crazy thought, but everyone is addicted right now to social
• 2:21:16
  media and addicted to going online and just addicted to content.
• 2:21:19
  You're constantly getting content. You're constantly interacting with your phone.
• 2:21:22
  And this is a very new thing, right? It's within
• 2:21:25
  the last 20 years this has happened to people. This
• 2:21:27
  is like prepping us for what's coming next. We're going
• 2:21:31
  to look back on these days and we're going to realize, oh,
• 2:21:35
  the addictions to the phones, the addictions to staring at
• 2:21:37
  the screens and checking your email and looking at YouTube
• 2:21:40
  and looking at Instagram and looking at Twitter. That's just
• 2:21:43
  preparing you for you being completely connected to electronics forever.
• 2:21:49
  This is like the early stages of it. I was
• 2:21:52
  thinking about it last night while I was watching this
• 2:21:54
  television show. I'm watching this crazy show. It's called From.
• 2:21:57
  Have you seen this show?
• 2:21:58
  Speaker 1: No, no.
• 2:21:59
  Speaker 2: It's nuts. By the guys who made Lost. One of
• 2:22:02
  the dudes that's in Lost is the main star of it.
• 2:22:05
  It's a fucking great show, like a really good show,
• 2:22:07
  like very unpredictable, twisted, just like Lost, like crazy show
• 2:22:11
  about these people stuck in this town. They can't get out.
• 2:22:14
  It's impossible to get out. But I was thinking while
• 2:22:17
  I was watching this, I was like, why is everyone–
• 2:22:20
  Because no one has a phone there and everyone's just
• 2:22:22
  locked into this place. I was like, your phone is
• 2:22:25
  preparing you. The addiction to our phones are preparing us
• 2:22:29
  to the next stage of what life is going to
• 2:22:32
  be like as a person. This is just the gate.
• 2:22:36
  The phones are the gate. But what's coming next, you're
• 2:22:39
  going to reminisce about the days of the phone. Oh,
• 2:22:42
  you remember when we had phones? We had to look
• 2:22:45
  things up. You had a little thing. You got to
• 2:22:47
  charge it. Remember when you had to charge it? That's
• 2:22:49
  how we're going to be. We're moving into some weird
• 2:22:51
  new area. They're building these fucking data centers everywhere. And
• 2:22:56
  everyone's like, oh, the data center. Oh, great. Like, what
• 2:22:59
  is that? What are you doing? Why are you building
• 2:23:01
  these things that need to be powered by nuclear reactors?
• 2:23:03
  Why are you building these things that are sucking up
• 2:23:06
  all the fucking water? Why are they putting these things
• 2:23:08
  out in the middle of the desert? Biggest fucking five
• 2:23:10
  football fields. Huge fucking giant buildings filled with computers. Like,
• 2:23:15
  what the fuck are we doing? And the gates is
• 2:23:20
  this goddamn phone. This phone is the gate. We're opening
• 2:23:24
  up the door to us being completely integrated.
• 2:23:26
  Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you why. My daughter can't watch
• 2:23:28
  a whole movie.
• 2:23:29
  Speaker 2: They have no attention span.
• 2:23:30
  Speaker 1: 40 minutes in, she has to leave, and then she'll
• 2:23:34
  start it from the next day. I had to watch Scarface, though.
• 2:23:38
  Speaker 2: You had her watch Scarface?
• 2:23:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because we do experimentals at the house. We did
• 2:23:43
  the fight club. We do all that shit. So she said, Dad,
• 2:23:46
  I always only watch the part when... He shoots the brother-in-law.
• 2:23:52
  That's the only part of it. It's always on when
• 2:23:55
  I come down. I go, I want to watch from
• 2:23:56
  the beginning. She enjoyed it for a little while. I
• 2:23:59
  went upstairs. After one scene, I'm like, I can't watch
• 2:24:02
  this again. She goes, I'll stay up. Two days later,
• 2:24:05
  her mother goes, did you see the review she wrote
• 2:24:08
  on it? And I go, no. She goes, take a
• 2:24:11
  look at it. And she's like, I enjoyed the movie.
• 2:24:14
  I was a fan because it was Cuban-American, but then
• 2:24:16
  as the movie rolled on, I figured these Cubans don't
• 2:24:20
  know how to treat women. He goes... They were smacking
• 2:24:27
  him and shooting.
• 2:24:28
  Speaker 2: All you do is sit around, wait for me to
• 2:24:31
  fuck you.
• 2:24:31
  Speaker 1: She didn't fucking like that at all. She was like,
• 2:24:34
  I know my dad's Cuban, but Jesus Christ, they're so
• 2:24:37
  mean to their women. I'm like, do I act like that?
• 2:24:41
  She goes, no, but that movie. That's the cocaine days,
• 2:24:44
  the 1980s. Yeah, she said, she goes, that gave men
• 2:24:45
  a different fucking thing. I go, Mercy, that was 40
• 2:24:48
  fucking years ago.
• 2:24:49
  Speaker 2: Not only that, you're dealing with the people that were
• 2:24:52
  the criminals of Cuba that were kicked out of Cuba
• 2:24:55
  that made their way to America. Like, this is not
• 2:24:57
  normal people.
• 2:24:58
  Speaker 1: No, no. And now they're about to let the second
• 2:25:01
  half out.
• 2:25:03
  Speaker 2: What are they doing to Cuba right now?
• 2:25:05
  Speaker 1: Well, they're not surviving. They don't have any power.
• 2:25:08
  Speaker 2: No gasoline.
• 2:25:09
  Speaker 1: No gasoline. It's funny because every couple days I get
• 2:25:14
  an algorithm which is promoting Cuban videos. Cuban videos. People
• 2:25:19
  in Cuba. They had kids going to work out. They
• 2:25:24
  took them to like this little place. Everything had papers
• 2:25:27
  on it. They did pull-ups, sit-ups with the head. The
• 2:25:30
  pipes were broken. You got to see these fucking kids
• 2:25:33
  doing full workouts where we wouldn't even look at their
• 2:25:37
  body weight workouts, you know? They talk and they go
• 2:25:41
  around Varadero and they interview people, and I don't know
• 2:25:44
  what this is doing. I don't know what this is
• 2:25:46
  doing because we're two years away from Cuba being legit.
• 2:25:49
  They're going to go back down there. After this whole
• 2:25:52
  thing goes or whatever, Whatever they decide, they can't get
• 2:25:55
  fuel from Venezuela. How long is it going to take?
• 2:25:58
  I mean, they're not going to be happy until they
• 2:25:59
  have a Starbucks in Cuba.
• 2:26:01
  Speaker 2: So what happened was they were getting their oil from Venezuela, right?
• 2:26:04
  We took over Venezuela. We cut off their oil.
• 2:26:06
  Speaker 1: Cut them off.
• 2:26:07
  Speaker 2: And so what is the United States trying to do
• 2:26:09
  with Cuba right now? They're trying to get rid of
• 2:26:11
  the communist government?
• 2:26:12
  Speaker 1: They're trying to. Well, they're going to charge Raul Castro
• 2:26:15
  with something recently. That's the beginning. This is going to
• 2:26:18
  end up like Noriega.
• 2:26:19
  Speaker 2: This is Fidel's brother.
• 2:26:19
  Speaker 1: You're going to wake up one day on ABC News.
• 2:26:22
  We're going to occupy Cuba. There they are in Cuba
• 2:26:25
  pulling people out.
• 2:26:26
  Speaker 2: But doesn't China and Russia have a relationship with Cuba?
• 2:26:29
  Isn't that a problem?
• 2:26:30
  Speaker 1: Not really because they're not paying their bills. That's why
• 2:26:33
  Cuba's starving. When they had Russia, Russia was fucking doing everything.
• 2:26:37
  But then they didn't need them no more and they
• 2:26:39
  cut them off. I think they do small trades for
• 2:26:42
  sugar or something.
• 2:26:42
  Speaker 2: It is kind of crazy for the United States to
• 2:26:44
  have an enemy that's 90 minutes offshore in a boat.
• 2:26:50
  Trump administration said on 2026, May 20th, indicted former Cuban
• 2:26:54
  president Raul Castro for murder based on the downing of
• 2:26:58
  two planes near the Cuban coastline in 1996 that killed
• 2:27:01
  four people. As a historian of Latin American and U.S.
• 2:27:04
  foreign policy, I believe the indictment may be the prelude
• 2:27:07
  to a direct U.S. military action against Cuba.
• 2:27:09
  Speaker 1: This is the beginning.
• 2:27:10
  Speaker 2: This is Kevin A. Young from UMass Amherst. Before Castro,
• 2:27:15
  the last U.S. indictment of a Latin American leader occurred
• 2:27:18
  in January of 2026. That's the Venezuela thing. Since January, U.S.
• 2:27:23
  has ended the flow of Venezuelan oil to Cuba and
• 2:27:26
  has economic and military pressure to prevent other nations from
• 2:27:29
  trading with the island. Trump recently threatened a friendly takeover
• 2:27:33
  of Cuba. I believe what's missing from most recent analysis
• 2:27:37
  of this situation is the history of U.S.
• 2:27:39
  Speaker 1: Aggression.
• 2:27:40
  Speaker 2: Against Cuba is essential context for understanding the Trump administration's
• 2:27:44
  recent escalations.
• 2:27:46
  Speaker 1: Once they indict you, they're calling for you. It's just
• 2:27:48
  a matter of time.
• 2:27:50
  Speaker 2: And they're just starving the country out.
• 2:27:51
  Speaker 1: And then they'll come up.
• 2:27:53
  Speaker 2: With a solution. Here's your solution.
• 2:27:54
  Speaker 1: You need to put in new leadership. They're not telling
• 2:27:56
  you there's a shooting or two in Cuba every night.
• 2:27:58
  Cuba's not getting... There's no power. There's no electricity. They
• 2:28:03
  have roaring, what do you call it? And that was yesterday.
• 2:28:05
  Speaker 2: Is that an earthquake?
• 2:28:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:28:07
  Speaker 2: Biggest one in 150 years.
• 2:28:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so they're just fucking, they're doing everything they can.
• 2:28:10
  Speaker 2: Is it the biggest one in over 150 years?
• 2:28:13
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Yeah, so everything is looking, like right now,
• 2:28:17
  that's it. They can't survive this.
• 2:28:20
  Speaker 2: So what happens to those people? They just wait this
• 2:28:23
  out with the United States so they get no resources,
• 2:28:27
  no supplies?
• 2:28:28
  Speaker 1: You got two things in Cuba. You have people that
• 2:28:30
  don't know. You ever watch that 30 for 30 with
• 2:28:35
  El Duque when they won the championship and they said
• 2:28:38
  people in New York were throwing toilet paper and the
• 2:28:40
  wife was grabbing it saying in Cuba this is gold.
• 2:28:43
  Why are you throwing away toilet paper? We have no
• 2:28:46
  toilet paper in Cuba. That's the mentality. So 50% of
• 2:28:50
  those people have been brainwashed. Where they, you know, every
• 2:28:53
  day there's a bullhorn. Buenos dias, patriotas. You know, when
• 2:28:57
  the communists, whatever they call each other.
• 2:28:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, comrades.
• 2:29:00
  Speaker 1: We're winning the war. We're getting closer. What do you
• 2:29:03
  mean I'm getting closer? I'm down to 118. I was
• 2:29:06
  walking around at 170. How are we getting closer to
• 2:29:09
  a victory? So they're getting sick of that shit. They
• 2:29:12
  say the bugs that land on you at night are
• 2:29:15
  fucking just... These, you know, they have real fucking bugs
• 2:29:20
  on that island. Not to mention, they all have syphilis.
• 2:29:25
  Cubans have syphilis. I think half my fungi toenail is
• 2:29:28
  syphilis because it smells like it. You know what I'm saying?
• 2:29:32
  But on a fucking not jokey thing. Cuba's got two
• 2:29:35
  weeks left. Two weeks from today.
• 2:29:38
  Speaker 2: And so you think they're going to invade?
• 2:29:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they're going to invade. Take Raul out. And then
• 2:29:43
  what do you got?
• 2:29:44
  Speaker 2: You're going to install some new.
• 2:29:46
  Speaker 1: I remember a couple months ago there was a shooting
• 2:29:48
  in Cuba of a boat. You remember that, right? Right, Jamie?
• 2:29:53
  Some people were out there fishing and the Cuban Navy
• 2:29:56
  shot them. What? Like three months ago. Oh, yeah.
• 2:29:59
  Speaker 2: Why did they shoot?
• 2:30:00
  Speaker 1: I don't know. They were investigating it.
• 2:30:02
  Speaker 2: Cuba hands out weapons to citizens and tell them prepare
• 2:30:05
  for an invasion.
• 2:30:06
  Speaker 1: Holy fuck. Holy fuck.
• 2:30:09
  Speaker 2: That's June 7th.
• 2:30:10
  Speaker 1: That's Sunday.
• 2:30:11
  Speaker 2: Sunday.
• 2:30:12
  Speaker 1: Sunday. So yeah, we're two weeks away, brother.
• 2:30:15
  Speaker 2: Distributing weapons to citizens in fear of a U.S. invasion.
• 2:30:19
  They reportedly started handing out weapons to civilians as the
• 2:30:21
  government urges population to prepare for a potential U.S. invasion.
• 2:30:25
  Reports from South American publication Version Final stated, against the
• 2:30:29
  backdrop of the deployment of American military power near the island,
• 2:30:33
  the government of Havana began distributing weapons to citizens, officially
• 2:30:37
  urging them to prepare for an imminent foreign invasion. What
• 2:30:40
  if the citizens use that weapon to take over the country?
• 2:30:43
  Speaker 1: Which they should do. That's what they fucking should do.
• 2:30:46
  Just call the fucking coup. That's kind of.
• 2:30:47
  Speaker 2: A crazy risk. Start handing out guns to people.
• 2:30:50
  Speaker 1: Like I said, man.
• 2:30:51
  Speaker 2: All of a sudden your population is armed and you're
• 2:30:53
  telling them what to do. And they don't have any
• 2:30:56
  money and you don't have any money either.
• 2:31:00
  Speaker 1: Look, man. When I started doing okay, I contacted my sister.
• 2:31:06
  I offered her a free ticket out of Cuba. Money.
• 2:31:09
  Whatever I got half is yours. You're my blood, you know. Right.
• 2:31:13
  I don't know if I can do that. Okay, why
• 2:31:15
  don't we do this? Why don't I fly you to Jersey,
• 2:31:17
  you go to your mother's grave, you go see where
• 2:31:19
  her house was, her way of life, and then I'll
• 2:31:22
  take you back. She told me I can never do
• 2:31:25
  that because I'm married to one of Fidel's guys. I
• 2:31:28
  don't even want to go to the United States. Oh, geez.
• 2:31:31
  So she was so brainwashed. And after that, she was
• 2:31:33
  still my sister, but I couldn't help her.
• 2:31:35
  Speaker 2: Well, you're used to what you're used to.
• 2:31:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's what it was.
• 2:31:38
  Speaker 2: Taking a big chance of coming to America and not
• 2:31:41
  knowing where you're going to eat and how you're going
• 2:31:42
  to live and where you're going to get money.
• 2:31:44
  Speaker 1: Are you going to work? They got programs for all
• 2:31:47
  those people. They got churches. Cuban people have churches. They're Catholics.
• 2:31:52
  Speaker 2: Is there also a thing where if you leave Cuba,
• 2:31:57
  I think it's a cleaner path to get to become
• 2:32:00
  a United States citizen if you're fleeing?
• 2:32:02
  Speaker 1: Right. Yes, it's easier. I think so. Something like that.
• 2:32:05
  Speaker 2: If you're fleeing a violent dictatorship, military dictatorship. Fuck, dude.
• 2:32:10
  It's just like, what are they going to do about that?
• 2:32:15
  Speaker 1: And then we're talking about Vegas. What's going to happen
• 2:32:18
  in Vegas if Cuba reopens? What do you mean? They're
• 2:32:21
  going to put gambling back there. You know the Americans
• 2:32:24
  are going to put gambling back there. They were negotiating
• 2:32:26
  already with Habers. Already they're talking.
• 2:32:30
  Speaker 2: Turn it into a resort. A location?
• 2:32:33
  Speaker 1: They're not going to rip down the architecture, that original
• 2:32:36
  architecture that makes Cuba and the cars and shit, but
• 2:32:40
  also something else. And I know America knows this. Those
• 2:32:43
  oceans are booby-trapped. Up to a mile out of Cuba,
• 2:32:47
  there's a ton of shit that they have. Booby-trapped. Mines,
• 2:32:51
  all that shit. They planted those during the Bay of
• 2:32:53
  Pigs invasion.
• 2:32:55
  Speaker 2: Look at this. Cuba, 1957. 1957, back when the mob
• 2:32:59
  ran it.
• 2:33:00
  Speaker 1: Look at everybody dressed impeccably. They would go there.
• 2:33:03
  Speaker 2: No flip-flops, no nothing. They loved it back then. They
• 2:33:06
  loved going to Cuba. People would go there, live it up.
• 2:33:09
  Speaker 1: And sex was free and cheap, and you could fuck
• 2:33:12
  a chicken those days. You'd get fucked in the ass
• 2:33:15
  by a guy with a big dick.
• 2:33:16
  Speaker 2: Food must have been amazing.
• 2:33:17
  Speaker 1: Dog, it was unreal. That's why the whole point of
• 2:33:21
  Kennedy and all that was for them to get Cuba back,
• 2:33:24
  the Italians. They were making too much money out of Cuba.
• 2:33:26
  And now they're going to start to put drugs in
• 2:33:28
  there and shit towards when they took it down. Cuba's
• 2:33:31
  been fucking riddled with bullshit for years. Every bad luck
• 2:33:36
  that they have, they created in the 50s and 40s
• 2:33:38
  because it was a sex heaven. Americans would go down
• 2:33:41
  there on a Friday and not come back. Whatever it
• 2:33:45
  costs here, $ 8, 000 will cost you $ 80 to get your
• 2:33:48
  dick sucked for three days and fed. People rubbing your
• 2:33:51
  feet and shit.
• 2:33:52
  Speaker 2: Castro Revolution had a major effect on Las Vegas. Look
• 2:33:55
  at that. Closure of Havana casinos spurred exodus to the desert. Wow.
• 2:34:01
  Frank Mir's father. Especially people in the, who?
• 2:34:03
  Speaker 1: Frank Mir's father.
• 2:34:04
  Speaker 2: What do you mean Frank Mir's father?
• 2:34:06
  Speaker 1: Frank Mir's father was a casino, so that's how he
• 2:34:08
  ended up in Vegas. Oh.
• 2:34:10
  Speaker 2: I thought you said Frank Mir's father was connected to.
• 2:34:12
  Speaker 1: No. So Frank Mir's father was a casino dealer in Cuba.
• 2:34:16
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 2:34:16
  Speaker 1: When Cuba closed down, he went right to Vegas. Oh.
• 2:34:19
  So a lot of those people went right to Vegas. Wow.
• 2:34:22
  Really interesting shit.
• 2:34:23
  Speaker 2: That is interesting. It makes sense because those are the
• 2:34:26
  two places. And if you're on the East Coast, the
• 2:34:28
  trip to Cuba is easy.
• 2:34:29
  Speaker 1: With 30 minutes.
• 2:34:30
  Speaker 2: It's like going to Florida.
• 2:34:31
  Speaker 1: 30 minutes. It was what you and your wife would
• 2:34:33
  do on a weekend. What are we doing?
• 2:34:34
  Speaker 2: How far is the flight from New York City to Florida?
• 2:34:39
  It's what, an hour?
• 2:34:40
  Speaker 1: Three.
• 2:34:41
  Speaker 2: Three hours?
• 2:34:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because Trump is down there now, so they go
• 2:34:43
  a different way now. No, really? You can't go straight
• 2:34:46
  to Fort Lauderdale or Miami. You've got to go outside
• 2:34:48
  that range if he's in Florida.
• 2:34:49
  Speaker 2: What did it used to be?
• 2:34:51
  Speaker 1: Two.
• 2:34:52
  Speaker 2: Two. It used to be two hours. So New York
• 2:34:55
  City to Cuba is only an extra half hour.
• 2:34:57
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 2:34:58
  Speaker 2: So like less than three hours.
• 2:35:00
  Speaker 1: Three hours you'll be on the island.
• 2:35:01
  Speaker 2: So it's basically the same as Vegas then.
• 2:35:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:35:04
  Speaker 2: It's the middle.
• 2:35:04
  Speaker 1: It's the middle.
• 2:35:07
  Speaker 2: But you're on an island. It's a resort.
• 2:35:11
  Speaker 1: Nobody knows what's going on.
• 2:35:12
  Speaker 2: It's beautiful.
• 2:35:13
  Speaker 1: You know, I told you that. My mother would tell
• 2:35:15
  me how all those Hollywood stars would hide in Cuba,
• 2:35:18
  especially Rock Hudson. That's when they would suck dick on
• 2:35:21
  the weekends.
• 2:35:22
  Speaker 2: Oh, Rock Hudson. That makes sense.
• 2:35:23
  Speaker 1: So all those Hollywood people would go to Cuba, lock
• 2:35:26
  themselves in. There was no TMZ. There was no press. Right.
• 2:35:31
  You know, these people in Cuba don't have a new,
• 2:35:33
  you know, how are they going to get the pay?
• 2:35:34
  Speaker 2: And everything's run by the mobs.
• 2:35:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:35:36
  Speaker 2: So it's like just all sin and vice.
• 2:35:38
  Speaker 1: Whenever you got a minute, you read that A Van Nocturne.
• 2:35:41
  That book. What is it called? It's A Van Nocturne.
• 2:35:44
  It's a revolution from three different places. Union City, New Jersey.
• 2:35:48
  New York City and Miami. No, no, not Miami, New
• 2:35:51
  York City, Tampa. And how those three cities were involved
• 2:35:57
  in that whole.
• 2:35:57
  Speaker 2: What do you think is going to happen to Cuba?
• 2:36:01
  If you had a guess.
• 2:36:02
  Speaker 1: If I had a guess, come on, I'm already seeing
• 2:36:05
  dollar signs. If you're a casino right now with how
• 2:36:08
  bad casinos are doing here, you're looking at that right there.
• 2:36:12
  Havana Nocturne.
• 2:36:14
  Speaker 2: How the mob... How the mob owned Cuba and then
• 2:36:17
  lost it to the revolution.
• 2:36:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Excellent book. Excellent.
• 2:36:21
  Speaker 2: And so that was Kennedy trying to get rid of
• 2:36:23
  the mob?
• 2:36:24
  Speaker 1: That's why they helped Fidel? Listen. Kennedy's father went to Chicago.
• 2:36:31
  And he talked to those people. They had the pull.
• 2:36:33
  If you live in Chicago or where else, you win
• 2:36:35
  the primary. I don't know how it works, Joe. I'm
• 2:36:37
  not a political guy.
• 2:36:38
  Speaker 2: Well, they definitely helped Kennedy get into office.
• 2:36:40
  Speaker 1: They helped Kennedy get into office.
• 2:36:42
  Speaker 2: But then when he got into office, then his brother—
• 2:36:44
  He didn't help him.
• 2:36:44
  Speaker 1: Get Fidel back. Then the brother double-timed them, and then
• 2:36:47
  they started shooting. And I don't know who shot Kennedy.
• 2:36:50
  I'm just saying this.
• 2:36:51
  Speaker 2: Well, the mob definitely didn't like him.
• 2:36:52
  Speaker 1: They were very upset. They cut into that pocket.
• 2:36:54
  Speaker 2: And the mob helped him get into office in the
• 2:36:57
  first place.
• 2:36:58
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 2:36:58
  Speaker 2: And then once he got in, they started prosecuting people.
• 2:37:02
  Speaker 1: Then he fucked them with the bad pigs when he
• 2:37:05
  pulled off air support at the last minute.
• 2:37:07
  Speaker 2: Supposedly he didn't know that they were going to do this.
• 2:37:10
  And then when they told him about it, he denied
• 2:37:13
  air support. And air support was critical to the success
• 2:37:16
  of the mission.
• 2:37:17
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 2:37:18
  Speaker 2: And Operation Mongoose. Robert Kennedy spearheaded his secret government project
• 2:37:23
  to topple the Cuban communist regime. working parallel to the
• 2:37:27
  CIA's mob-assisted efforts. But this is after the revolution, right?
• 2:37:34
  This was when Fidel was running Cuba.
• 2:37:37
  Speaker 1: Right. Right. They were trying everything they do to kill
• 2:37:40
  fucking Fidel. They were doing everything.
• 2:37:42
  Speaker 2: This is after. So what spurred the Cuban takeover of
• 2:37:47
  of the military's taking over of Cuba? Mob bosses like
• 2:37:51
  Sam Giancana and Santo Traficante were recruited to help eliminate
• 2:37:55
  Castro using methods like poison pills. Mafia wanted Castro gone
• 2:37:59
  so they could reopen their multimillion-dollar Cuban operations. Wow.
• 2:38:04
  Speaker 1: That's all it was, was money. Wow. Big money.
• 2:38:07
  Speaker 2: Untraceable. Oh, I can imagine.
• 2:38:08
  Speaker 1: Unfettered.
• 2:38:09
  Speaker 2: Untraceable.
• 2:38:10
  Speaker 1: Nothing, no nothing.
• 2:38:11
  Speaker 2: And you're over there living the life.
• 2:38:13
  Speaker 1: Nobody knows nothing. Maya Lansky eating fucking Cuban food every day.
• 2:38:16
  Speaker 2: They probably had it all set up. It was nice.
• 2:38:19
  And then the revolution came.
• 2:38:20
  Speaker 1: Kosher Cuban food every day. Fucking Maya Lansky.
• 2:38:22
  Speaker 2: So what did the people think? The people think that
• 2:38:26
  these mob motherfuckers, they're ticking over our country. Let's let
• 2:38:30
  Castro come in and we'll be socialists and everything will
• 2:38:34
  be great. Or did they just get taken over?
• 2:38:36
  Speaker 1: They got taken over. What happened was Castro went in there.
• 2:38:39
  Batista was horrible. Batista was fucking no better than Castro.
• 2:38:45
  So when Castro took over, he was to take over
• 2:38:47
  Batista and make Cuba, but in the conglomeration, he became
• 2:38:52
  a communist somewhere along the line. And then when he
• 2:38:55
  took over Cuba, that's when he shut the casinos down.
• 2:38:58
  He destroyed the fucking casinos. And then the Italians got mad.
• 2:39:03
  They all came back. And then they were just, they
• 2:39:06
  thought it was going to be temporary. Like, this is
• 2:39:09
  going to be temporary. We'll clean over this. So for years,
• 2:39:12
  Italians were just watching the news, waiting for somebody to
• 2:39:15
  kill fucking Castro. It was the Italians.
• 2:39:20
  Speaker 2: And then when they thought that the United States was
• 2:39:21
  going to go in there and invade, like, oh, good.
• 2:39:24
  We're all set.
• 2:39:25
  Speaker 1: I wish there was more film from those days so
• 2:39:27
  people could see. Like, my mother explained things to me.
• 2:39:30
  I wish she was still alive because I could have. Like,
• 2:39:32
  she said that Italian food was different in Cuba. She goes,
• 2:39:36
  first of all, the pizzas had lobster on them and
• 2:39:38
  shrimp already back then in the 50s. Wow. Because she
• 2:39:42
  didn't like the pizza in the United States. She goes,
• 2:39:43
  not the same. They put fresh shrimp from the fucking ocean, lobster,
• 2:39:48
  fucking all these other things. They got these pies now
• 2:39:51
  in New York. I'm scared to try them. I can't.
• 2:39:53
  They put calamari on the pizza. How fat can you get?
• 2:39:58
  How fucking fat do you want to be? You go
• 2:40:00
  to these pizza places in Jersey, dog, it's like... Ziti,
• 2:40:04
  a pound of Ziti on a slice of pizza.
• 2:40:06
  Speaker 2: There's pizza places in Jersey that are just going off.
• 2:40:09
  And the sandwich places in Jersey.
• 2:40:11
  Speaker 1: Oh, your boy. Your boy's going off.
• 2:40:13
  Speaker 2: Oh, Giovanni, but that's White Plains.
• 2:40:16
  Speaker 1: That's so. That's phenomenal.
• 2:40:17
  Speaker 2: I've been doing a little tour. There's nothing like Italian
• 2:40:20
  delis on the East Coast. There's nothing like that.
• 2:40:22
  Speaker 1: That smell, like that cheese when you walk in and
• 2:40:25
  the fucking olives and shit.
• 2:40:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's insane.
• 2:40:27
  Speaker 1: Unbelievable. Unbelievable.
• 2:40:29
  Speaker 2: It's insane.
• 2:40:29
  Speaker 1: There's too much pizza. Like, just too much. You know,
• 2:40:33
  it's funny. When I moved there, I'm like, I'm scared
• 2:40:34
  to gain weight, the pizza. I eat one slice a week. Maybe.
• 2:40:39
  Speaker 2: Maybe.
• 2:40:41
  Speaker 1: Since I had the knee surgery, I've been doing a
• 2:40:43
  podcast at the house. So I've been ordering pizza from
• 2:40:46
  this one place, and my buddies go crazy. That's the
• 2:40:49
  best pizza we've ever had. It's thin, sweet red sauce. Oh, yeah.
• 2:40:53
  Extra cheese, you burn it. It's fucking thin. Oh, my God.
• 2:40:56
  And the sweet red sauce. God.
• 2:40:58
  Speaker 2: They know how to make pizza on the East Coast.
• 2:41:00
  And they try out here. They do a pretty good
• 2:41:02
  job out here.
• 2:41:03
  Speaker 1: They try.
• 2:41:03
  Speaker 2: But it's just not the same.
• 2:41:04
  Speaker 1: It's missing something.
• 2:41:05
  Speaker 2: Same as the sandwiches. There's some good Italian sandwiches out here.
• 2:41:09
  They're pretty good. But they can't fuck with, like, Giovanni's place.
• 2:41:14
  Speaker 1: Bro, Giovanni sent me two shipments that were.
• 2:41:17
  Speaker 2: He's the best.
• 2:41:17
  Speaker 1: I had to give him half of it away. I'm like, Giovanni.
• 2:41:19
  Speaker 2: I know. He sends you so much.
• 2:41:20
  Speaker 1: Fucking salamis and fucking dried salami. Salamis and cheese. Oh.
• 2:41:24
  Speaker 2: The cheese is incredible, right?
• 2:41:25
  Speaker 1: Oh, and the cookies.
• 2:41:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
• 2:41:26
  Speaker 1: His fucking cookies are the fucking dive floor, bro. Yeah.
• 2:41:30
  You know, and that's everywhere. Like, I just stopped fucking around.
• 2:41:34
  Speaker 2: Well, when I go to the East Coast, I just assume.
• 2:41:36
  Speaker 1: I'm being terrible. Oh, I gotta take you to this place.
• 2:41:39
  Speaker 2: Which place? You took me to El Nido. That was phenomenal.
• 2:41:42
  Speaker 1: El Nido now is Covo Steakhouse. Whatever, but.
• 2:41:46
  Speaker 2: It's a steakhouse now?
• 2:41:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:41:47
  Speaker 2: Is it great?
• 2:41:49
  Speaker 1: They fucked me up a couple weeks ago. I went
• 2:41:50
  in there five to nine. I've been there three weeks
• 2:41:52
  in a row with big party, and then my wife wants,
• 2:41:56
  and then a friend wants. I go in there when
• 2:41:57
  they have five to nine. I'm like, let me get
• 2:41:59
  a 14-ounce with a fucking beer, and they're like, we're closed.
• 2:42:05
  There ain't nobody in here. You can't make another steak? No,
• 2:42:09
  we're closed. Not even nine. No reason to go back.
• 2:42:14
  Speaker 2: That's a bummer. That's people wanting to go home.
• 2:42:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't give a fuck. It's a steak. There's
• 2:42:19
  nobody in here. The bar is cute in there. Nobody's
• 2:42:23
  ever in there. They got a male bartender. They got
• 2:42:24
  a blonde with big tits. You see this place? Pack
• 2:42:26
  the fuck up. You got a little Spanish guy that's
• 2:42:29
  a great guy. But I go to this place now.
• 2:42:33
  They had on the special three weeks ago. You ready?
• 2:42:38
  Stuffed shells with lobster meat.
• 2:42:41
  Speaker 2: Ooh.
• 2:42:41
  Speaker 1: Out of the carton sign. And he gives you five
• 2:42:44
  of them in a tray. Oh, Joe.
• 2:42:47
  Speaker 2: What's this place called?
• 2:42:48
  Speaker 1: Hosteria.
• 2:42:50
  Speaker 2: Where's it at?
• 2:42:50
  Speaker 1: Marlboro. This is my spot. Yeah? I go there because
• 2:42:54
  the dude will do whatever I ask him to do. Like,
• 2:42:57
  he has a menu, but then he'll go, Joey, have
• 2:43:00
  you tasted my Italian fried rice? You're like, what are
• 2:43:03
  you talking about, Italian fried rice? And he makes risotto
• 2:43:05
  with lobster and shrimp, a fried rice. So he's going
• 2:43:10
  to add it. He's got a new restaurant opening. So
• 2:43:11
  he lets me sample everything. He makes a cheesesteak to
• 2:43:16
  die for with the bread with the seeds on it. Oh, yeah.
• 2:43:20
  The semolina bread. Yeah.
• 2:43:25
  Speaker 2: Osteria.
• 2:43:26
  Speaker 1: There it is.
• 2:43:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, that looks good. Yeah, there's nothing like East Coast
• 2:43:30
  Italian food. Nothing even compares.
• 2:43:34
  Speaker 1: No, Steve and Angelo in there? Bro, get the fuck around.
• 2:43:37
  Speaker 2: All right, let's wrap this bitch up.
• 2:43:38
  Speaker 1: Bro, thank you for having me.
• 2:43:40
  Speaker 2: My pleasure.
• 2:43:40
  Speaker 1: I love you.
• 2:43:40
  Speaker 2: When are you leaving town?
• 2:43:41
  Speaker 1: Thursday. I'm around all week.
• 2:43:43
  Speaker 2: All right, all right.
• 2:43:43
  Speaker 1: But I'm in Atlantic City, 7th and 8th at Ocean's Casino,
• 2:43:46
  White People Casino.
• 2:43:48
  Speaker 2: July 7th and 8th.
• 2:43:49
  Speaker 1: No, August.
• 2:43:50
  Speaker 2: August 7th and 8th.
• 2:43:51
  Speaker 1: Okay. Chicago got announced. November 5th.
• 2:43:55
  Speaker 2: What's the website for people to go to find out details?
• 2:43:57
  Speaker 1: I got no fucking website.
• 2:43:58
  Speaker 2: You don't have a website?
• 2:43:59
  Speaker 1: JoeyDiaz.com or net.
• 2:44:00
  Speaker 2: Is that real?
• 2:44:01
  Speaker 1: I don't know anymore.
• 2:44:03
  Speaker 2: All right. Well, they'll find you. They'll find you. So
• 2:44:05
  one more time, where's the casino?
• 2:44:08
  Speaker 1: Ocean's Casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey, the 7th and 8th. Tremendous. Beautiful.
• 2:44:12
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 2:44:12
  Speaker 1: I think the governor's coming. The governor? Yeah. Yeah, Mikey Sherrill.
• 2:44:16
  I don't even like her, but I do like Mikey Sherrill.
• 2:44:20
  I do like Mikey Sherrill because she's a Democrat. You're
• 2:44:22
  not supposed to like her, but it was funny. I
• 2:44:23
  went to a restaurant. Some guy's like, hey, man, life
• 2:44:26
  would have been so much better with Jack Chitorelli. I go,
• 2:44:28
  I know, but he lost by 400,000 fucking votes. He
• 2:44:31
  tried to— a Republican in Jersey? That's never going to fucking work.
• 2:44:34
  They've been Democrats since Jesus showed up. So— 400,000 votes, bro.
• 2:44:40
  That's a lot. I'd be in my house with the
• 2:44:42
  windows fucking like Sonny Black and Donnie Brasco with the windows,
• 2:44:45
  the shades drawn for a year. 400,000 fucking votes.
• 2:44:48
  Speaker 2: Did you see that podcast I did with Joe Pistone? Yes.
• 2:44:51
  Speaker 1: Very good. Crazy. He was very good on it.
• 2:44:53
  Speaker 2: He was amazing.
• 2:44:53
  Speaker 1: He's a good dude, too.
• 2:44:54
  Speaker 2: He's a really good guy.
• 2:44:55
  Speaker 1: He's a good white fucking savage.
• 2:44:56
  Speaker 2: What a crazy life. The real Donnie Brasco. I mean,
• 2:44:59
  he really fucking lived like that.
• 2:45:01
  Speaker 1: And he infiltrated the Bananos. Yeah. Deep.
• 2:45:04
  Speaker 2: They never recovered from that. They even loved him after
• 2:45:07
  he died. Fucking came out and they found out he
• 2:45:09
  was a cop. They're like, oh, you were better than me.
• 2:45:12
  That's like one of the guys said that to him.
• 2:45:14
  Speaker 1: Hey, you won. You beat me. Wow. Nuts. All right.
• 2:45:20
  I love you, brother. I love you, too. Thank you
• 2:45:21
  very much.
• 2:45:21
  Speaker 2: We're going to have fun tonight. All right.
• 2:45:23
  Speaker 1: Bye, everybody.