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The Value of Reaching for Your Potential · Is Your Way In Your Way?

0:25
Cassandra: Hello out there to all of my listeners and I'd like to welcome you to Is your Way In your Way podcast, and I know that there's some new listeners.
0:33
Cassandra: That's listening.
0:35
Cassandra: You're either in the car or you're just either listening, doing some work I'm not quite sure, but I want to share with you what this podcast is all about.
0:43
Cassandra: It's actually for individuals who are stuck, and what I mean is there's something in your heart that you know you should be doing, but you're not doing.
0:49
Cassandra: Stuck, and what I mean is there's something in your heart that you know you should be doing but you're not doing it, and you're not quite sure why.
0:54
Cassandra: For example, there's some that want to write a book, there are others that want to start a business, somebody that wants to forgive somebody they know in a relationship that they know is not good for them Just a whole gamut of things.
1:08
Cassandra: So we just talk about subjects or topics related to personal development, business development and even to enable you to do some self-reflection, and today our topic is about the value of reaching for your potential.
1:28
Cassandra: And who better yet to talk about that is my special guest, and her name is Dagna Bieda.
1:36
Cassandra: Hi there, dagna.
1:38
Cassandra: How are you?
1:39
Dagna: Hi, cassandra, thanks for having me, and I'm super excited to be here today.
1:44
Cassandra: I am too.
1:44
Cassandra: I'm very excited.
1:46
Cassandra: Before we really get started, I'm just going to read a little bit about your background and I'm sure you're going to fill us in on some things, because my listeners like to hear a little bit about you before we get started to the question, so they have somewhat what I call a point of reference.
2:04
Cassandra: Dagna is an engineer turned career coach for engineers, and also I'm hearing that it's not just engineers now that she's coaching.
2:14
Cassandra: She's coaching a lot of different individuals with different professions, but she's been doing it over 10 years of the coding experience and four plus years of coaching.
2:25
Cassandra: She provides what we call tough love and practical guidance, drawing from her own experience.
2:32
Cassandra: Dagna's clients come from diverse backgrounds, including small companies, FANG companies.
2:38
Cassandra: Now I definitely want to talk about FANG, F-A-A-N-G and some of you may have heard of that.
2:45
Cassandra: This is my first time hearing about it, and when we said it's a tech company, it's like Facebook it stands for it's an acronym actually Facebook, Apple, Netflix and Google.
3:01
Cassandra: And I'm missing another A what is that other A?
3:04
Cassandra: Daga Amazon?
3:05
Cassandra: It's Amazon.
3:06
Cassandra: Oh, my gosh, how could I forget Amazon?
3:09
Cassandra: So isn't that amazing that that she's actually worked for FANG companies and various educational paths such as self-taught, boot camps, college graduates and those with military or immigrant backgrounds.
3:24
Cassandra: She helps them unlock unlock their potential and pursue exciting career opportunities by reprogramming their mindset for success.
3:35
Cassandra: She's not just a coach for software engineers.
3:38
Cassandra: So let's listen to her and hear from Dagna and learn how to transform your career, because I know we have some listeners that are ready to move forward in their career.
3:48
Cassandra: I know we have some listeners that are ready to move forward in their career.
3:50
Cassandra: So, wow, what a background.
3:51
Cassandra: And I just can't wait for you to hear all this phenomenal things that Dagmar is going to talk about.
3:55
Cassandra: That I know is going to support, empower you to move forward.
3:59
Cassandra: Now, Dagna, what?
4:08
Dagna: was your life like before you became an engineer?
4:10
Dagna: Well, it's been a while, so I would say that one thing that drove me into engineering was really this idea of creating the future, and I was always very creative.
4:20
Dagna: You know, as a kid I love to sew dresses for my Barbie dolls, and there was always this element of like creating something from different puzzles, from elements like just grabbing different things and putting them together, making something new out of that, which is very engineering like, and I was pretty good at math.
4:39
Dagna: I really liked this kind of solving intellectual puzzles and it was fun.
4:45
Dagna: So I thought what's the better place, what could be more suited for my skills and my interests than becoming an engineer?
4:55
Dagna: So I ended up finding a degree that felt like the most futuristic thing that I could find, because, literally, I wanted to build the future, whatever that means in the mind of a teenager, right, right, and I picked um control engineering and robotics as a field of study, and that's actually my um, my background in terms of my degree.
5:18
Dagna: Now, you would think that robotics is like super cool and amazing, and it was for a while, but the reality is that building robots takes a long time and I was actually out of college, starting my career, and I wanted to move fast okay so you know, with robots that's not really a possibility.
5:41
Dagna: It takes a while to build them so I didn't stay in the robotics realm for too long.
5:48
Dagna: I ended up switching to software engineering because I thought if I am creating an app, for example, right working at a company, and that app could be in the hands of millions of people, then I'm going to have an impact.
6:06
Cassandra: Yes.
6:06
Dagna: Impact is something that I've always been looking for.
6:09
Dagna: Like looking back, seeing it in hindsight, and working for software engineering companies various types, from startups to bigger companies to things in the middle, working for consulting agencies as well, I realized that it was fun for a brief moment but it wasn't really you know a couple of years, right, it wasn't really it anymore, and I ended up burning myself out.
6:43
Cassandra: Wow, oh wow.
6:44
Cassandra: You know that's fascinating because you know, we know about the STEM program and they say very few women are in the engineering field or the math field or the tech field.
6:56
Cassandra: So that's amazing, that that's something you have creativity, and that's something that you got right out of school and job in that particular industry and those particular industries in that particular industry and those particular industries.
7:09
Cassandra: So kudos to you Now.
7:17
Cassandra: But you've indicated that.
7:18
Cassandra: Well, let me ask you you said you got burned out, but what lessons did you learn from that career before we move on to your next career, career?
7:27
Dagna: I would say that everything's a puzzle to solve and if you're trying to solve a problem, sometimes all you need is like this small little piece that's missing or changing perspective because maybe you're thinking about the problem wrong.
7:46
Dagna: So I think the major benefit of having a robotics background which is pretty eclectic because on one hand, you need to know how to program a microprocessor, but on the other hand, you need to understand how humans and robots interact with each other, like what's the social element of interaction.
8:07
Dagna: You have to understand AI, like there's so many different eclectic things that come into robotics or like even knowing biology, right, whenever we're talking about bionic arms or exoskeletons, which is super cool to like read about and talk about.
8:24
Dagna: But what I really enjoyed about my career is that it was this vast amount of knowledge from different domains and then I could kind of like pick and choose what worked together and how it would apply to my career.
8:41
Dagna: And there's this book called Range, which is phenomenal, that talks about how generalists thrive in a specialized world.
8:51
Dagna: I believe the author's name is David Epstein and it's a phenomenal book because it talks about how, when you have experience coming from different backgrounds, you are so much better at coming up with innovative solutions, thinking outside of the box, just because you've had experience in various domains, right.
9:15
Dagna: So, to anyone listening, if you're considering a career change, it's a phenomenal thing to do.
9:21
Dagna: Let me tell you.
9:24
Cassandra: Right, right, so okay, so you transitioned Now how long were you doing that?
9:32
Dagna: The transition or the what.
9:35
Cassandra: The career and the engineering, like how long were you in that profession?
9:40
Dagna: So I did.
9:40
Dagna: I was a robotics engineer for over two years I want to say three and then I was a software engineer for seven-ish years about, if my memory doesn't you know, play some tricks on me right now and I've been coaching for the past five years.
10:04
Dagna: In January it's going to be six it's going to be six.
10:11
Cassandra: Okay, I asked that question because there are a lot of listeners that have been in their role for maybe five, six, seven, you know, like you've been at 10 years and and there's some of them that are burnout and they're tired and they want to do something different, and you mentioned burnout as well.
10:46
Cassandra: So I just wanted to know your transition from that to a coach.
10:52
Cassandra: Explain to people that transition was like just getting unstuck Maybe.
10:58
Cassandra: Maybe you were stuck before you figured out.
11:00
Cassandra: I think I'm ready to leave.
11:03
Dagna: So, cassandra, before I answer your question, I have to add that personal bit that you started you know the podcast with, because I'm the kind of person that I always chased my curiosity and I trusted my gut, right.
11:19
Dagna: So what happened at the point of me burning out, to just kind of paint a picture, set the scene how I decided to move into coaching.
11:28
Dagna: Basically, my husband and I we met traveling, backpacking in Europe.
11:33
Dagna: At that time I was still working in Europe and I thought that meeting up this guy was a fun adventure and I'll never see him again.
11:42
Dagna: But we had so much in common.
11:47
Dagna: He's a fellow engineer too.
11:49
Dagna: We value the same things, things and we just vibed and like since we've met, we have talked every single day and he was able to convince me to get into a long distance relationship because he had to go back from his trip across Europe after graduating from college.
12:07
Dagna: He came back to United States and we were like in this long distance relationship and he convinced me to move to the States.
12:16
Dagna: Well, his student debt convinced me.
12:18
Dagna: Let's be straight.
12:20
Dagna: It was so much easier for me to move, for us to give ourselves a chance at a real relationship, for him to pay off his debt here in the States, than as if he had moved to Europe just because of the salary differences.
12:36
Dagna: The market in United States is basically configured to help people pay off that debt.
12:41
Dagna: In Europe because the education is free, that kind of money is not in the market, and so I ended up moving here.
12:50
Dagna: And after I moved, I never really looked back and stopped to think what it meant and even though someone you know, even though nobody, nobody died, it felt as if I was grieving the past life that I've left behind and I had trouble letting that go.
13:14
Dagna: So, even though I moved to be with the love of my life, that I can tell that.
13:20
Dagna: I can see now it was really difficult transition.
13:24
Dagna: And then we got married, we traveled for our honeymoon, came back, had a baby I had.
13:31
Dagna: In all this, I had already been a software engineer working in my career and it was like this kind of pancake of issues that collapsed together in September of 2019, where it wasn't just the burnout.
13:49
Dagna: It was also that complicated grief of moving abroad, of being an immigrant, of leaving my entire life behind, yeah, and the postpartum depression from having a baby.
14:01
Cassandra: Yeah.
14:02
Dagna: And kind of being oblivious to what it means to have a baby, because I got to say I was probably for an entire year in denial that my life has changed.
14:11
Dagna: As a mother, Okay.
14:13
Dagna: So all these things kind of collapsed and I came into work.
14:17
Dagna: I'm a at that point, I'm a senior software engineer.
14:20
Dagna: I'm trying to work towards a promotion and have a one-on-one with my manager at work and I burst out crying my goodness sobbing, just having a conversation yeah and, oh my goodness, I'm sitting there like who's this person crying?
14:41
Dagna: that's not me.
14:42
Dagna: I value being professional, being able to keep your cool at work and, like I would never imagine that I'm the kind of person that would cry in front of my manager.
14:52
Dagna: But it was like a wake up call, like Dagna, stop pretending you do not need help.
14:57
Dagna: And so I reached out to a third party professional, to a therapist, and I could see, within literally months of us just talking, my perspective changed.
15:16
Dagna: She helped me understand how my past created this situation and me avoiding to deal with certain issues have led to this situation that I was in being burned out with postpartum depression, suffering from complicated grief and unable to let go and move past that.
15:30
Cassandra: Wow, that's a lot.
15:32
Dagna: I know.
15:32
Dagna: But like in a short timeframe she helped me kind of out of this, out of that funk, and I had this aha moment like this is the kind of impact that I could have on other people's lives.
15:51
Cassandra: Wow, so so is that what led you to start coaching, because of that transition and that trauma drama that occurred in your life?
16:05
Dagna: That situation made me commit to being a coach because, truth be told, I was already testing the waters.
16:14
Dagna: I was trying to build a business on the side because I was already coaching people per se in my job as a senior software engineer, because as a senior, whenever there's new people being hired, you have to onboard them, you have to guide them, you kind of help mold them into future senior engineers.
16:35
Dagna: And so I was doing a lot of that at work already and I really liked it and I started seeing how people build businesses out of that and I thought, hmm, that sounds cool, that sounds like something I would like to pursue.
16:49
Dagna: But having gone through therapy and experiencing a massive change, just from talking to someone who got it is so gratifying being able to help someone on their journey of life.
17:17
Cassandra: Right.
17:18
Cassandra: So it's kind of like, I would say, your world kind of rocked and like, okay, if it were not for that, then you probably would not be doing what you're doing today.
17:32
Cassandra: And I mentioned that because we all go through something you know may not be what you've gone through, but it's something.
17:40
Cassandra: And either that situation can either enable somebody to be bitter about what has occurred or either better and what you realize that this was something you couldn't do by yourself.
17:51
Cassandra: You need to get some help, and that's okay that we all need help.
17:56
Cassandra: We all need somebody.
17:57
Dagna: Absolutely.
17:58
Cassandra: Yeah, just to talk through it.
18:00
Cassandra: So, wow, that was interesting.
18:04
Cassandra: Now, why do you?
18:06
Cassandra: You know, the title is the Value of Reaching your Own Potential.
18:12
Cassandra: Okay, Do you think what you're doing now is you've reached your potential?
18:20
Cassandra: I know you have more to do, but what do you think about that?
18:25
Dagna: Oh, absolutely not.
18:26
Dagna: There's still so many things that I need to learn in order to grow, in order to continue growing.
18:32
Dagna: And you know, as we talked before the show, both you and I we have our books.
18:37
Dagna: Mine came out October 1st.
18:39
Dagna: It's called Brain Refactor and there's about a rough estimate 30 million engineers in tech at this point in time, and I plan to reach all of them with my book because I feel like it can have a massive impact on their lives and it can help them improve.
18:59
Dagna: So I'm still chasing the impact and I am nowhere near to being done, is it?
19:08
Cassandra: Yeah, like the book, is the brain refactor Optimizing right, optimizing your internal code to thrive in tech and engineering and get more success, fulfillment, money, opportunities, impact and growth.
19:25
Cassandra: Now that is powerful, and your focus right here is just for tech and engineers.
19:30
Cassandra: And so that's going to go for just one gender.
19:34
Cassandra: You know the female gender because it's more.
19:36
Cassandra: Now you tell me it's more men in the tech and engineering industry.
19:42
Cassandra: Is that true?
19:43
Dagna: That's the unfortunate state of tech at this point in time.
19:47
Dagna: You are correct, cassandra.
19:48
Dagna: However, it's a very young discipline.
19:51
Dagna: It's only about 80 years old at this point in time and if you had the opportunity to watch Hidden Figures, for example, you'd know that the first computers were actually females, right, doing all the calculations, doing all the math.
20:05
Dagna: And at the very beginning, for a long time, the computer engineering, computer science, when it started out as a field, when IBM came out with the computers, it was 50 females and males coming from different backgrounds, with the caveat that, again, females were the first computers doing all the calculations.
20:27
Dagna: And what happened is I believe I watched this documentary and I can't remember exactly the date, but basically when, um, but basically when the Game Boy was invented, it was the time when the marketers had started taking advantage of that progress, of creating games.
20:52
Dagna: But the market was very polarized between pink and blue, and so they had to figure out which aisle they're going to be selling their tech products that are related to gaming, which was completely new at that point in time, and you know they came up with game boy.
21:10
Dagna: Why is it a game boy, not a game girl?
21:13
Dagna: Ever stop for a second to think about that?
21:16
Dagna: And I feel like it wasn't really intentional.
21:19
Dagna: It was more of a unfortunate ripple effect, but the marketing around it was so powerful that, as a society, we've been programmed to believe that it's not for girls yeah, right, and now a lot of stem initiatives are trying to correct that um, and it's a phenomenal effort, but they're still lacking a lot right, and I've been many times the only female engineer on my team or in my company, or the very first one growing um the female team, which was very rewarding experience.
21:56
Dagna: I'm really happy seeing that there's more and more, in general, diverse people coming into tech.
22:04
Cassandra: Right yeah.
22:06
Dagna: And one of the things that is really helping with the industry to kind of rebalance the fact that it's mostly dominated by white males is the boot camps.
22:16
Dagna: White males is the bootcamps.
22:17
Dagna: I love working with bootcamp grads and one thing, cassandra, that I noticed is that I didn't mention I'm a university trained engineer, but a lot of the time when I work with bootcamp graduates, because they have this range of qualifications, they don't have the things that are holding back the quote-unquote traditionally trained engineers that went through a four-year college degree.
22:44
Dagna: So, for example, in the engineering we're trained to overvalue tech skills, the hard skills, and ignore people.
22:54
Dagna: Soft skills basically ignore or just like overlook them completely.
22:59
Dagna: What bootcamp grants bring to the table is that they have a balance right.
23:05
Dagna: They are able to grasp technology and are smart enough and dangerous enough to know what is it that's happening to, to utilize technology to solve a business problem, and they have the people skills to then self-market themselves, talk to other people, connect with other departments, and I often see that bootcamp brands progressed in their career much faster.
23:30
Dagna: That's good.
23:32
Cassandra: Right, you're coming in and out a little bit.
23:36
Cassandra: That's the internet that's going on.
23:38
Cassandra: That you initially had some problems with, just so my listeners will know that.
23:43
Cassandra: But you know what you stated.
23:45
Cassandra: You're exactly right and I think it's all about a mindset.
23:49
Cassandra: You know, because men dominate that industry, then it's a mindset as a woman.
23:54
Cassandra: As a female, I can't do that, but yet once they get out of school and get into that bootcamp, then they're triggered like, yeah, I'm liking this.
24:03
Cassandra: It's not as bad as I think, because years ago the thing was women don't do this.
24:10
Cassandra: But you're right, in Hidden Figures, women did do that.
24:13
Cassandra: So I'm hopeful now, as time goes by and society shifts a little bit, that that would change.
24:20
Cassandra: And I know your book is going to be just unbelievable.
24:25
Cassandra: I think it's going to.
24:26
Cassandra: I know it's going to impact individuals, to really start being interested in getting into the STEM program.
24:32
Cassandra: I think that's great, Great.
24:34
Cassandra: I hope so.
24:36
Cassandra: Yeah, I believe so.
24:38
Cassandra: I believe so because you, you, you are passionate about it and that's when that happens.
24:45
Cassandra: That could be your full potential at that time.
24:48
Cassandra: But as we move on and progress and get old and get more mature or whatever, something else will change, you know, so you had mentioned that.
24:59
Cassandra: Well, the individuals that you coach you had said a lot of them are in their way and it's time for them to get out of their own way.
25:09
Cassandra: Could you share what are some of the characteristics or traits or habits that they whereas they're in their way because of those?
25:19
Dagna: traits or habits that they, whereas they're in their way because of those.
25:23
Dagna: I love that you highlight that, cassandra, because in my book I go into exactly four ways, four specific ways that cause imposter syndrome, burnout, trouble dealing with other people or self-marketing struggles, and I compare how the human brain works, kind of like a software, and so if something's not working and you're experiencing imposter syndrome, you just have to log into your brain and reprogram what's not working, and it could be as simple as that.
25:56
Dagna: Right, and you're absolutely right.
25:58
Dagna: A lot of the time when I coach people and in my own personal growth journey, I realized sometimes you think you are facing an obstacle, but then it turns out that you're the problem Because either there's a mindset gap or a skill gap that needs to be fixed or a perspective shift to overcome that perceived obstacle.
26:20
Dagna: So you are totally in your own way at all times.
26:27
Cassandra: So of course it sounds like the mindset is a common thing.
26:33
Dagna: I mean because let's put it that way Brain is at the center of everything that we do.
26:39
Cassandra: Right.
26:40
Dagna: So if we can improve brain and our thinking, everything else improves too.
26:45
Cassandra: Exactly.
26:45
Cassandra: So how can one improve that?
26:48
Cassandra: Like, what are some of the the methodologies that you use to support individuals to get out of their way?
26:56
Cassandra: And because I think you know, when they're in their way people are nonproductive, you know it's like okay, and then to me they never what I would say live their best life on their terms, because of the mind, because of the things in their way.
27:15
Cassandra: So what are some of the methodologies that you use to support or empower individuals to get out of their way?
27:22
Dagna: A hundred percent.
27:23
Dagna: A hundred percent, like, if something in your life isn't happening the way you would love it to happen, it's because you're in your way, and it's your mind that's stopping you from getting what it is that you're trying to get.
27:36
Dagna: And before we hopped on this call, we were briefly talking about how there are different modalities, right?
27:43
Dagna: So I mentioned that therapy is a phenomenal place to start, because it helps you understand how your thinking became what it is right.
27:52
Dagna: I like to say that in your, between your ears, there's this legacy mental code, and what that means is basically that your lived experience programmed you to act the way you act, to think the way you do, to react the way you do, and a lot of it is automatic, yeah, and we are not even aware.
28:13
Dagna: so, for example, if, uh, I'm tired, I snap at my kids, you know that's just kind of automatic response and unless I can become more aware of that fact, there's nothing that could ever stop me from acting that particular way.
28:32
Dagna: So awareness is key, becoming mindful of how your programming came to be, why you think the way you do.
28:43
Dagna: And your life programmed you to act that particular way.
28:46
Dagna: Therapy is a phenomenal tool to figure that out.
28:49
Dagna: Coaching is kind of like taking it to the next step, where you are trying to figure out, okay, this isn't optimal, how can I make it better?
29:00
Dagna: Are trying to figure out, okay, this isn't optimal, how can I make it better?
29:03
Dagna: Right?
29:03
Dagna: And the specific difference between therapy and coaching is that therapy is trying to kind of get you from from like a deceased state to like normal but, coaching takes you from normal to your peak performance.
29:15
Dagna: So there's like a different interest there, but there's a lot of overlap.
29:18
Dagna: So coaching and therapy is number one.
29:19
Dagna: It brings that self-awareness, that mindfulness and there's like a different interest there, but there's a lot of overlap.
29:20
Dagna: So coaching and therapy is number one.
29:20
Dagna: It brings that self-awareness, that mindfulness, and there's a lot of tools that therapists and coaches often share that that help you on a daily basis to either reflect or notice and become aware.
29:37
Dagna: Now the third thing that I highly recommend is this neurofeedback training.
29:42
Dagna: Excuse me, and to explain it better, I like to compare to a phone, right?
29:49
Dagna: Okay, how often do you update the software of your phone, cassandra?
29:56
Cassandra: I don't, but somebody else does.
29:57
Cassandra: So it's time for an upgrade and you just push that button and it goes on its own.
30:05
Dagna: Exactly, your software updates probably like once a month or so.
30:09
Dagna: Right, you have this new features that come to your phone and you don't have to really do much about it, it just updates itself.
30:16
Dagna: And it's similar with your brain.
30:17
Dagna: The software is like the thinking patterns, your beliefs.
30:21
Dagna: So let's say you learn something new and that could change a little bit how you're thinking.
30:26
Dagna: That's a software update, right, but then every now and then I bet you would go to the store and be like here's my old phone, thank you, I'll take a new one.
30:36
Dagna: Yes exactly Right, because you want the newest hardware too.
30:40
Dagna: Yes, and how does that relate to the brain?
30:43
Dagna: Well, the hardware here is like the actual biological structure of your brain how it's wired, how it's connected, how, like, the frequencies that it works at, and neurofeedback training, also called QEEG.
30:59
Dagna: Biofeedback helps first of all measure how your hardware is currently performing and then optimize the things that are not working.
31:09
Dagna: So I took myself in order to help me combat the postpartum depression, and it was phenomenal, because I had the postpartum depression twice with my first two kids, but with the third one, after I did the biofeedback, I never had the postpartum depression, and now I'm an expectant mom of a fourth kid.
31:28
Dagna: So you can see how it helped me, because how on earth would I commit to having another one?
31:34
Dagna: You just go ahead, baby, right.
31:36
Dagna: Yeah.
31:38
Dagna: And like it changed how I show up in relationships, because it helped my brain update itself and process information in a different, better, more optimized way is it right?
31:56
Cassandra: neural feedback and in the beginning, with the awareness that's, is that the subconscious in the beginning, like you ought to?
32:03
Cassandra: It's like auto.
32:05
Cassandra: You know you because of your experiences, what you've been through you, just automatically.
32:10
Cassandra: It's kind of like when you're a little girl or a little boy and somebody says you know, you're not smart enough.
32:18
Dagna: Not quite.
32:18
Dagna: No, not smart enough.
32:20
Dagna: That's beliefs.
32:21
Dagna: That's the software part.
32:22
Dagna: Coaching and therapy is what changes what you believe to be true about yourself or the world around you.
32:30
Dagna: Okay, all right.
32:31
Dagna: What neurofeedback does is that let's say Well, I could call in my example that my husband loves when I talk about it Go for it, there were situations when he would just talk to me and I would get agitated and irritated and annoyed and felt like he was attacking me, even though he wasn't.
32:55
Dagna: But it's how my brain was processing the information, triggering a state of fight, right, just like we have the fight or flight or freeze response.
33:08
Dagna: My system was wired in a way that wasn't optimal, so sometimes I would start a fight for no reason because of how my hardware of my brain was wired.
33:21
Dagna: And after the training, he was the one who noticed like wow, like you're being nicer to me, you know, yeah, yeah, okay, and it's not that I was a mean person and I didn't really change my feelings to him or perspective about him.
33:42
Dagna: You know, know, it's just that my brain started processing sounds differently oh, that's interesting we can.
33:54
Dagna: Now we have probably saved, you know, marriage because of just saying that.
34:01
Cassandra: I know, I know, and actually that can be used to for individuals to get out of their way too right, absolutely so.
34:11
Dagna: Imagine a life where there's no anxiety, where there's no depression, where there's no overthinking, because there are specific parts of your brain that are responsible for anxiety, for depression and for overthinking.
34:21
Dagna: There are specific parts of your brain that are responsible for anxiety, for depression and for overthinking, and if you can adjust those parts of your brain, everything else will improve too.
34:30
Dagna: So I feel that after having done the neurofeedback training, I have changed how I show up in relationships and became much more unstoppable.
34:44
Cassandra: If you will.
34:46
Dagna: Another thing I noticed is, cassandra, after having kids, that my brain changed in the sense that I don't know if it's part of the exhaustion, and I haven't really seen a study that would analyze mother's brains before and after pregnancy, but I would love to see something like that.
35:05
Dagna: But essentially, after having kids, my brain was dead at night.
35:09
Dagna: I could only come back home and binge a Netflix show and that's it, like I wasn't able to be productive and creative and just use my brain at night because I was so exhausted, like there was no energy or resources for my brain to use.
35:25
Dagna: After the neurofeedback training and being able to figure out which areas of my brain were underperforming or overperforming, contributing to this loss of basically mental energy, I am now able to have this fantastic conversation with you in an afternoon, which was not a possibility, yeah yeah, just a few years back, before I did the neurofeedback training.
35:52
Dagna: So I highly, highly, highly recommend that, because the changes are very subtle and it doesn't change who you are.
35:59
Dagna: It changes how your brain operates and how you perceive the world, which makes everything easier, and it feels so surreal because you live your entire life thinking a certain way and then understanding that your brain can work much more optimally is like whoa so surreal how long is this training?
36:22
Cassandra: how long is it?
36:24
Dagna: so it depends on the individual, but it takes about um 40, 60, 80 sessions.
36:31
Dagna: You have to go into a biofeedback clinic in person because the way it works is they put like this little hat that measures the frequencies of your brain and basically you watch TV in your sessions.
36:47
Dagna: It's super easy.
36:48
Dagna: After your brain map is done and it's been identified, what are the pain points and pain areas, problematic areas that you want to improve, then you go into a session and all you do, cassandra, is watch TV.
37:02
Cassandra: But there's a special software.
37:04
Dagna: So the TV is connected to sensors on your head.
37:07
Dagna: There's about four, two sensors, depending on what it is the area that you're working on, and based on real-time information from the sensors measuring the frequency of that particular brain area, the screen that you're watching would like change its size, or it would lower the brightness, or you it would lower the volume of what it is that you're watching, creating a micro penalty.
37:32
Dagna: And your brain likes to be efficient.
37:36
Dagna: Any human brain likes to be efficient, so it doesn't like those penalties, so it will try to act in a way to keep the the image steady, without changing the brightness and without changing the audio so it's kind of like a like a penalty reward system.
37:55
Dagna: Yeah, that teaches the brain on you could say, molecular level, how to optimize yourself.
38:01
Dagna: But you, as a client or patient, you just sit there and watch tv.
38:05
Dagna: There's no talking about past traumas, there's no need to share and be vulnerable with anyone, because all you do is sit and watch tv that's the first I've heard about, and I'm certain insurance doesn't pay for that not yet.
38:20
Dagna: yet, however, I've seen that there are some movements who are trying to convince the insurance to start paying for that, because the patient cost is so much less than, for example, covering a cost of someone who's been suicidal and admitted in the hospital.
38:43
Dagna: It's so much less If they had gone through a neurofeedback training.
38:46
Dagna: That could have helped their brain act more efficiently and prevent those kinds of thoughts Right.
38:53
Dagna: And it helps for a majority of things that are related to brain not being optimal or efficient, like ADHD, depression, anxiety, sleep issues, you know, memory issues.
39:08
Dagna: So, like there's so many ways that you could help your brain be more efficient by using that, I'm I'm just so excited we could talk about this for hours.
39:17
Cassandra: No, no.
39:18
Cassandra: Okay, so, dagna, that I think that's great, but the majority of the people, number one at the moment won't be able to afford it.
39:28
Cassandra: Number two, they may think it's you know, like you know, it's kind of weird.
39:33
Cassandra: And so what without that?
39:37
Cassandra: And in your coaching, do you well, do you recommend that to some of your clients?
39:44
Cassandra: And the ones that you don't recommend it is is how do, how?
39:49
Cassandra: What other ways can somebody break free from that anxiety and that burnout and frustration in your coaching?
39:57
Dagna: So whenever we're working, whenever I work with my clients and my coaching, we focus on the software updates, right With the hardware.
40:06
Dagna: The only thing that I can recommend is really improving your diet, improving your sleep habits and including exercise in your daily regimen.
40:15
Dagna: Right, and it's like very, I would say, basic kinds of improvement that you could do, very, I would say basic kinds of improvement that you could do.
40:23
Dagna: But in terms of diet and Dr Amen, who has a type of a clinic that does brain scans a different kind, but he does talk about it I would highly recommend looking him up.
40:37
Dagna: But the way I work with my clients, in terms of understanding the burnout, the anxiety, the depression, it's really about understanding how their legacy code in their mind came to be.
40:50
Dagna: So what we do is we follow this five-step process that is in my book, which is basically, I call it the brain refactor algorithm and the step one is identifying root causes.
41:04
Dagna: right, there's a reason you're burned out, you're depressed, anxious, and most likely the reasons that have led you to this point in time, at the time that they were created in your programming, were beneficial, were for your survival, were helpful and made perfect sense.
41:24
Dagna: However, as you lived your life, probably some of those patches in the code turned into bugs or inefficiencies and now you have to go back and reanalyze them.
41:40
Dagna: So, for example, let's say, let's say you were the fourth of six siblings and your older siblings were always loud and it drove you crazy.
41:52
Dagna: So as a kid you were hiding.
41:55
Dagna: You like to hide and just stay away from all that noise because it annoyed you that noise because it annoyed you right.
42:05
Dagna: But now you're a professional and you keep on hiding when someone covers, you know a lot of the room and you tend to like shy away from being at the center of attention and that kind of behavior, even though it's rooted in your past and it made sense when it was put into your code code base, it doesn't make sense anymore.
42:25
Dagna: It's not serving you anymore because you want to be seen as the valuable professional you are and you want to get that promotion right.
42:31
Dagna: So I help my clients see how that programming from the past is impacting their now and how it will impact their future if they don't really do anything about it, right right, so um why do you think there's value in individuals reaching their potential?
42:56
Dagna: because that's why we're on this earth.
42:58
Dagna: That's what we're here to do in a simple way.
43:03
Dagna: In a simple way, yeah, all of us.
43:06
Dagna: The way that I see things is that our bodies are like vessels and our souls are here kind of renting it out for an x amount of time we don't know how many years we've got but the bodies are not our core essence or true self, or you could call it a soul.
43:27
Dagna: Right, they're kind of separate and they're like on a mission, and part of the mission is to discover the mission and then really implement it.
43:36
Dagna: So whenever you're trying to reach for your potential, you're basically coming to do what you're meant to do.
43:48
Dagna: I'm not even sure how to put it into words, but, cassandra, you know, yeah, I'm not really sure how to respond to that.
44:01
Cassandra: Let me see if I could shed some light on it.
44:03
Cassandra: And this is my perspective.
44:05
Cassandra: Okay, what's your take?
44:06
Dagna: on it yeah.
44:07
Cassandra: Yeah, and my take on it is I believe that we're all here for something.
44:14
Cassandra: We're not here just to be here.
44:15
Cassandra: Okay, I think we all are ordained, and when I say ordained, I'm talking about that's a gift that you've been given.
44:22
Cassandra: And I think, and I and I know that as you start working to to get that gift, to manifest your whole outlook and things, you feel better because you're doing what you were created to do.
44:38
Cassandra: So I, I, I agree that.
44:42
Cassandra: You know, and a lot of people don't get to their potential because they're stuck, for some, because of mental illness, it's just a array of issues that don't allow them, enable them to get there.
44:56
Cassandra: But yet, as you're coaching, and what I do is kind of talk to individuals Number one, a lot of them don't even know.
45:00
Cassandra: What I do is kind of talk to individuals Number one.
45:03
Cassandra: A lot of them don't even know what their potential is.
45:05
Cassandra: You know, if I say you want to live your best life, what does that look like?
45:09
Cassandra: You know, and that's when you talk about awareness.
45:12
Cassandra: You know I call it the ABCs, the mind.
45:17
Cassandra: You know you want to be aware and acknowledge what's going on.
45:19
Cassandra: Where did the origin of that belief come from?
45:22
Cassandra: And then the C is can we change the narrative on it?
45:27
Cassandra: So I really believe that we're here for something and we don't know how long we're going to be here.
45:37
Cassandra: But I tell you, when you're doing what you ordain to do with your gifts, life is so much better.
45:43
Cassandra: I'm not saying you won't have problems.
45:45
Dagna: Yes, absolutely, Absolutely agree and there's some research that supports that too that when you're aware of what it is that you value, what it is that you care about, and you can align what you do with what you value right, Then you can tap into flow states, you tap into unending motivation to keep going because it puts you on fire, right.
46:11
Dagna: And it's phenomenal and I totally agree I love your, your way of putting it that it's a gift.
46:18
Cassandra: Yeah, it is, it really is.
46:20
Cassandra: And just to kind of tap into it, because so many people are like, well, why am I here?
46:24
Cassandra: And then there are a lot of people that they're just here and that's why a lot of them are very unhappy because they're just here.
46:33
Cassandra: You know, that's true, yeah, yeah, and you talked about understanding your values are important.
46:41
Cassandra: Branding and clearing limiting beliefs can stop you.
46:46
Cassandra: I mean, that's what you said and I totally concur to that.
46:52
Cassandra: You know, and it's all about those limiting beliefs, you know, yeah, like you said, we could talk about this all day long.
47:02
Cassandra: Exactly Right, we can talk about this all day long.
47:08
Cassandra: Um, let me ask you, um, the top mistakes your clients make?
47:22
Dagna: They try to figure it out themselves for way too long.
47:26
Dagna: Okay, I mean, time's such a precious resource, and the way I see it, too, is like you are your best investment.
47:38
Dagna: Right, you can always make more money, but you will never get back the time.
47:42
Dagna: So I am a huge fan of investing in myself by either getting coaching or learning new things or buying books, and I don't even think about it, like if I see a book, I just I'm gonna get it on Amazon and have it shipped to me the next day, because there's incredible value in learning from other people's mistakes or following a proven framework that has worked with people poor people and, of course, you could try and diy it right, do it all yourself, figure it out yourself, but you're wasting precious life yes.
48:20
Dagna: The time that you'll never get back.
48:22
Dagna: So that would be really the top mistake.
48:25
Dagna: At the point that my clients come to me, they are obviously open to investing in themselves.
48:33
Dagna: And the second biggest mistake is being closed for feedback.
48:39
Dagna: You have to be open for feedback in order to grow.
48:41
Dagna: A lot of us well all of us have a lot of blind spots and we're not even aware.
48:47
Dagna: So, for example, my big issue when I moved to the United States, being an Eastern European, is that I was very I was coming across very arrogant, harsh, very mean.
49:00
Dagna: Some people would tell me that I was rude and I was like you're just too sensitive, okay, get yourself together.
49:09
Dagna: And I did not allow for that feedback.
49:12
Dagna: Hey, your communication skills are lacking.
49:15
Dagna: You need to work on those skills.
49:17
Dagna: I was deaf Cass Cassandra for years, and that helped me, held me back from getting that promotion that I mentioned earlier.
49:27
Dagna: That I cried in a meeting with my manager right, because I didn't have the skill to communicate assertively.
49:36
Dagna: In my mind it was the people around me being too sensitive and having something against strong, professional women.
49:44
Dagna: That's how I interpreted it, but it wasn't reality and I can see it now because I've gained the skill of assertive contribution and now, looking back, I'm like yeah, I'm not like you gotta own it, you were just straight, right, right, and I look at that as that has very much helped you in your coaching.
50:09
Dagna: Yes, it's been incredibly beneficial because I work with people like myself all the time and I work with people who work with people like myself who are, for example, suffering in poster syndrome and being afraid to get in meetings because they work with arrogant seniors, and I'm like.
50:28
Dagna: This is why this person is like that.
50:30
Dagna: It's nothing related to you.
50:32
Dagna: Here's how you're going to work around it.
50:34
Dagna: You know, I know because I've been that person.
50:36
Dagna: So it's been a tremendous hope having that experience.
50:45
Cassandra: Yeah, because you were probably being people were intimidated so they would shut down.
50:48
Cassandra: Yeah, absolutely, Absolutely.
50:51
Cassandra: Dagna, like I said, I could talk to you on and on and on, but I would love to know, and my listeners would love to know, how can they connect with you?
51:02
Dagna: love to know, and my listeners would love to know how can they connect with you?
51:08
Dagna: Linkedin is the absolute best place because that's where I'm very active connecting with people talking about what it is that I do with my coaching.
51:11
Dagna: But a second best place is actually Amazon Getting my book Brain Refactor, because my book talks about everything that we talked about today, plus actual case studies of my past clients and how they got past imposter syndrome, out of burnout, how they figured out how to deal with troublesome other people and how can they self market themselves better.
51:34
Dagna: So, just reading the book, I really try to write it in a way that it will feel conversational.
51:40
Dagna: Try to write it in a way that it will feel conversational Like the reader and I are having a conversation at a coffee or just taking a stroll in beautiful park and, you know, just sharing that wisdom that I've accumulated over a lifetime, and these are the best places to connect.
51:57
Dagna: Other than that, I am accepting clients, so you can find more information on my website.
52:02
Dagna: Other than that, I am accepting clients, so you can find more information on my website themindfuldepcom.
52:05
Cassandra: Mindful Dep.
52:06
Dagna: Okay, and that's how we can connect further.
52:09
Cassandra: Exactly.
52:10
Cassandra: Well, you were certainly a pleasure and I tell my listeners I know that they gravitated to our conversation.
52:18
Cassandra: I can just feel it and I also want them to share this with some of their friends and, of course, this is going to be on all podcast platforms and if, in fact, they like the podcast, I encourage them to subscribe and I encourage you to get the book, because I'm going to get that book.
52:39
Cassandra: That book is going to help me with my clients as well.
52:42
Cassandra: So I thank you for that.
52:43
Cassandra: Dagna, my pleasure.
52:46
Cassandra: Yeah, we're not on an island alone.
52:50
Cassandra: We can't be alone.
52:51
Cassandra: We need support.
52:52
Cassandra: We need people around us, the people that has our best interest at heart.
52:57
Cassandra: So just know that the support that Dagna got, she's here to help you.
53:02
Cassandra: I'm here as well.
53:03
Cassandra: I call myself a mentor, she's a coach and it's not that much of a difference.
53:09
Cassandra: So just know to utilize and use your resources.
53:12
Cassandra: And again, dagna, thank you so much and my listeners.
53:17
Cassandra: God bless you and bye for now.