Latest / QUESTION EVERYTHING / Hooters, Humor + Hollywood Miracles with Fortune Feimster

Transcript

Hooters, Humor + Hollywood Miracles with Fortune Feimster · QUESTION EVERYTHING

• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Big things happen when you're pretty, pretty bold, pretty clever,
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: pretty strong. I'm Danielle Robe and each week my guests
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: and I have conversations that put a new spin on pretty.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: This is pretty smart. Comedian Fortune Feimster is a breath
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: of fresh air in the stand up scene. Her Netflix
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: comedy special is like having a laugh with an old friend,
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: a friend who never makes you feel bad because they're
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: just too busy making fun of themselves. You probably remember
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: her as a writer and panelist on Chelsea Lately, or
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: from her appearances in The Middy Project or Office Christmas Party.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: Her new Netflix special, Good Fortune, premierees on October twenty
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: fifth on Netflix. I got a sneak peek and it
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: is really funny. Woven into Fortune's jokes about her North
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: Carolina upbringing, her Hooter's loving mother, and debutante Balls is.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: A really inspiring story.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: It's all about betting on yourself, asking for miracles, and
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: most importantly, finding the funny in everything. Fortune is maybe
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: the best name in comedy.
• 1:16
  Speaker 3: It's pretty good, right, It's so good. I have my
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: grandmother to think for that.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: I heard that story. She had a group of women,
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: so it's.
• 1:23
  Speaker 4: Her mother's maiden name.
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: There was three daughters in that family and they called
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: them the Misfortunes.
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: So that was a group of women I think you
• 1:32
  Speaker 4: might be thinking of.
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: And she just really really wanted my mom to name
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: me fortune.
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: She was very adamant about it.
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: And my mom loved the name Emily, that's my first name,
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: and was like, no way, she'd have to be Miss
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: America to live up to a name like that.
• 1:48
  Speaker 4: So I ended up being my middle name.
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: But I never resonated with my first name, and no
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: one ever called me it.
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: They called me like fimester, femi, femur.
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: So when I started on comedy, like I have this
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: cool middle name, my grandmother really wanted that to be
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: my name, and I started using it as a nod,
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: like a little shout out to her, and then it's
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: here we are.
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: It just took I hope.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: That she and her sisters took all the misfortunes.
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: I thank you.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, she's probably she with us.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: No, she died when I was eighteen, which is part
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: of why I started using it when.
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: I did comedy. It is kind of a remembrance of her.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: That's beautiful.
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: Oh thank you.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: So you grew up in North Carolina. LA must have
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: been quite a shock.
• 2:34
  Speaker 4: It was.
• 2:35
  Speaker 3: It was somewhere I'd never visited before, and I'm from
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: a tiny town of nine thousand people. But the one
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: saving grace is I randomly, after I graduated college, I
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: moved to Spain for a year, so ad me Spanish
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: a little bit, but not well it's been so long
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: since I was there. It was an amazing experience, but
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: it was hard to live abroad when you've grown up
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: in this tiny town.
• 2:59
  Speaker 4: I went to a tiny in college, but I think
• 3:01
  Speaker 4: if I hadn't done that, La would have been super hard.
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: But I was like, I can live anywhere now, so
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: when I left Spain to move to LA, and I
• 3:10
  Speaker 3: think it helped that transition a lot.
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: When I read that you wrote Robin Williams a letter
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: in seventh grade, and he replied, I thought this has
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: been in you forever.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And I didn't even think I realized that until
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: I found that letter when I was home this February.
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: You didn't remember writing it.
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: I remember vaguely like sending them something and getting a picture.
• 3:34
  Speaker 4: Back, but I didn't really remember what I wrote. I
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: didn't remember what he wrote. And I took a.
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: Picture of the letter and I thought it was so
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: cool that you know, him or his.
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: People whoever you know, took the time to do that.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: What did he say, Gosh, I don't even.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: Remember now, but something about like, you know, pursuing your
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: dreams and sticking with it, and just like thinking it
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: was an appreciation of watching him and his stuff and
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: just giving you that personal connection, which you know it
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: does stick with you that someone cares that you watch
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: their thing and that you support them.
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: That was really neat.
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: Do you remember your first time on stage?
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: Yes?
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: Well I had two kind of experiences. I remember my
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: first time doing theater, and that was terrifying.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: I was different, like comedy is more terrifying.
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: I don't know the Shakespeare as a you know, this
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: southern girl trying to.
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: Be like where art thou. It wasn't great.
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: But my first time doing comedy was improv and I
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: definitely remember that first show.
• 4:40
  Speaker 4: I was just like, this is the greatest feeling in
• 4:42
  Speaker 4: the world. People were laughing and having a good time.
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: But then my first stand up stage was at the
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: end of a six week class and I talked about
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: how much I hated strawberries. If that tells you how
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: far my material has come. But it was very niche
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: I know, but it was an awesome feeling, like being
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: up there and hearing.
• 5:08
  Speaker 4: Like your words make a reaction like that.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: So the first time you went up it resonated.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that I found something that I think
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: I at the time it felt like, oh, I'm meant
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: to be here. So yeah, I didn't feel like, oh,
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna enter into this very weird world and let's
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: give it a shot. It felt very much like you
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: finally found it. I found the thing.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: Would you watch stand ups and think like I can
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: do that?
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: Or I watched more like SNL type things Carol Burnett,
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: like a lot of charactery stuff. I was really drawn
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: to those big, silly characters, people acting ridiculous. Oh and
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: so I did the Growlings for like seven years where
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: I did all that.
• 5:51
  Speaker 4: Stuff, but stand up. I didn't grow up watching stand up.
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: So I think when I did see stand up, I
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: felt like, oh, there's something in tree about that. But
• 6:01
  Speaker 3: I don't think I looked at it like oh I
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: could do that. I think it was more like, oh,
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: that's interesting.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: Now that you say the characters, it makes me think
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: that's kind of how we met you on Chelsea Lately.
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I did a ton of sketches and stuff for them.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: This was really special. I actually just did an episode
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: on miracles. Oh really, so this resonated with me. You
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: asked for a miracle shortly before you got the writing
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: job at Chelsea Lately. I don't know if you've seen this,
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: but online the singer Sierra, there's like this big joke
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: because she prayed for a good man and then she
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: got Russell Wilson.
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, every woman.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: Is like, tell me the prayer. Like so when I
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: was reading this, I was like, what's the miracle? What's
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: the prayer?
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: Well, you know, life does have those moments where it
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: kind of makes you feel like you're in the right
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: place to the right time, doing the right thing, and
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: that was one of those moments.
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 6:54
  Speaker 3: I was a journalist and that was my day job,
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: and that's how it paid my bill. I was doing
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: comedy at night. All these newspapers folded and I lost
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: my job and I had enough money to live for
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: that specific amount of time, and I was like, I
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: don't know what I'm gonna do to pay the bills,
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: but I kind of put went all in, like I'm
• 7:16
  Speaker 3: gonna put it all in to comedy, see what happens.
• 7:20
  Speaker 3: And a year later, I was broke and not having
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: a lot of traction. I had done last comic standing,
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: so I got something. I had that like enough to
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: give me hope, like that this could be something. But yeah,
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: it was New Year's and owed my roommate rent for
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: the next you know month, and didn't have it and
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: no prospects, and I just had that come to Jesus
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: moment and my friends were and I were sitting around
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: a table and we you know, did that very la
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: thing where it's like, what are your resolutions and tell
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: us how you feel?
• 7:55
  Speaker 4: And I just gave it.
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: I gave it over to like I got nothing, and
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: I don't know how i'mna pay my bills. I'm scared,
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: and this is the first time I don't know how
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: to dig myself out of this hole. I really want
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: this thing, and I think I'm supposed to do this thing,
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: and I don't know how to get there.
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: And I've done everything I can to try to make
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: it happen.
• 8:16
  Speaker 3: You know, just have that thing of like this is
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: very real place of where I'm at. And my friends
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: just kind of rallied and this one friend made this
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: joke of like she started hitting the.
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: Table like I pretending to be Oprah and she was like,
• 8:31
  Speaker 4: you're gonna go to Australia, and you're gonna go to.
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: Australia, and then we all started hitting the table. So
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: there was something about this maybe this energy coming together.
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: And three weeks later I had an interview for the
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: Chelsea Lately Show for a writer position.
• 8:45
  Speaker 4: One week later I got hired, and the first day.
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: Of work, the showrunner brought me into this office and
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: he said, by the way, we're in May going to
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: go to Australia for a week your kid film and
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: we already decided you were going to come with us, and.
• 9:02
  Speaker 4: I was like, oh my god, I have chills.
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: So it was like one of those things where I
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: was like, this is exactly where I'm supposed to be
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: and it and say it totally changed my career. They
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: were the first people I'd tested twice for SNL didn't
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: get it obviously, and they were the first.
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: Chelsea was the first person that said yes. She opened
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: this big door that was closed.
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: To me for a long time in the industry, and
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: I've been working ever since.
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: So It really did change the course of my career.
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: It was reading about how you said that she's the
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: person who said yes when everyone else said no.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: Humility aside.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you think she was able to see
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: in you that other people just did it'?
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: I think that she has this ability to not care
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: about like Hollywood had a very specific idea of who's
• 9:53
  Speaker 3: allowed on television and who's not. You know, you gotta
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: look this way, you gotta be this weight, you gotta
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: be this this thing, get a fitness mold.
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: And she was one of the few people who.
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: Was in a position of power who didn't feel like
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: that mold.
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: Made sense for her.
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: She liked the things that were different or unique, like
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: the things that made her laugh. You know, she wasn't
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: beholden to this Hollywood stereotype. And that was a time
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: when being different was not accepted or encouraged.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: Not celebrated.
• 10:27
  Speaker 3: No, not like now we're really entering into a place
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: of like, you're different, that's awesome. We want you know,
• 10:33
  Speaker 3: unique voices and different voices. That was not the case
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: in twenty eleven. So she just had this ability to
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: find talent and put them on television when nobody else
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: would and the audiences were like, yes, that's what we want,
• 10:48
  Speaker 3: because audiences were saying, now, I don't want that cookie
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: cutter thing y'all been shoving down our throats for a while.
• 10:54
  Speaker 4: We like this different thing. It worked.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: It definitely wasn't It feels like it was sort of
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: this place. When I've interviewed people that worked on the show,
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: it's like one of the special and most incubators, Like
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: there are moments of that in Hollywood.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: You can tell, like Friends maybe was one of them.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: She special.
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: She introduced a lot of comics you know that are
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: still really successful in working and doing cool things.
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: And I think everyone's like seeing all of us laugh together.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: I think the idea of if we call it rejection,
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: like you kept saying, there was all these no's, is
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: so universal. It seems to me every person that I
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: interview that pushes through the gauntlet has to tell themselves
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: yes so many times when everyone's telling you no.
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: I mean, that is the thing this business has taught
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: me more than anything, is to bet on yourself. I mean,
• 11:53
  Speaker 3: that is the biggest thing I've had to learn, even
• 11:56
  Speaker 3: in times where you have a comfortable job.
• 12:00
  Speaker 4: Finally made it to the point where you have a thing,
• 12:02
  Speaker 4: you have to push yourself. What's the next thing?
• 12:04
  Speaker 3: Like, don't get too comfortable in this, Like always challenge
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: yourself to try new things, do new things. But yeah,
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: this is a business that loves to say no, and
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: it loves to tell you.
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: Why they don't want you over and over and over again.
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: So you have to really get to a place of being.
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: Like knowing you're worth believing in that and sticking to
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: it and not veering from that.
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: And it's hard. I mean hard.
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: There are plenty of times where you're just like how
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: do I get through this? But it doesn't make you
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: stronger and you get that thicker skin and you just
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: got to be ready for those opportunities when they come.
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: You mentioned that you were a journalist for seven years.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: Before, which is incredible because I think entertainment journalists like
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: get this sort of interesting rat Yeah you know, and
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: you have all you have all these really.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: Funny stories of your time on the red carpet.
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the woman training me just like handing me her
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: type recorder and it was like next up as you
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: So yeah, that was wild.
• 13:04
  Speaker 4: I think that was the very first movie premiere I
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: did on my own.
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: It was like Bad Boys too, and then Legally Blonde
• 13:11
  Speaker 3: two was the next one, and then I'm interviewed in
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: Reese Witherspoon.
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: Were you serious or were you funny?
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: Well? I think I just look funny naturally, and I
• 13:20
  Speaker 3: have this very thick Southern accent. So I found that
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: you would see them act a certain way down the
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: Red carpet, and then they would get to me and
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: I'm kind of a goofball and I'm like.
• 13:30
  Speaker 4: Hey, y'all, like what are you doing? And We're gonna
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: have fun tonight.
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: And you could kind of see there like there's a
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: little bit of a guard up. You can kind of
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: see it fall a bit, and so I just feel like, yeah,
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: I did end up. You didn't have some like neat
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: conversations with with people for like five minutes.
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: We had like a cool conversation. They probably won't.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: Remember it, but at the five minutes it's a long time.
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: You must have been really fun.
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: I mean usually it's like fun questions. Yeah, sometimes sometimes
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: you got that too. It depends. It would depend on
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: how busy the Red Carpet was.
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: What did the Red Carpet teach you? Because it actually
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: taught me persistence.
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Oh, I hated that, like yelling her, it's the
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: one I wouldn't do it.
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: I was just like, I don't care if they can
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: just keep walking.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: I always felt like such a parasite. Yeah, it was
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: just a really tough job to swallow for me.
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's why I just I talked to
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: the people that wanted to be talked to, and I
• 14:28
  Speaker 3: wouldn't really get into that crazy like I'm yelling at
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: question at somebody.
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: But that's because the people I worked for were really
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: cool and nice.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: I have that pressure, so it let me learn about
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: the business kind of adjacent.
• 14:41
  Speaker 4: I got to just talk to them about their jobs.
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: It's kind of cool to have that insight before you're
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: on the other side of the carpet.
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: When I got to go to sets and kind of
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: see how it worked from an her perspective.
• 14:52
  Speaker 4: So I loved it. It was fun.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: So much of success in life hinges on support and community.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: I've never understood that more than when I launched Pretty Smart.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: Here's what I mean. As a TV host, my work
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: was fast paced research, study, produce stories or interviews for
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: the next day, get out into the field and do them, post,
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: produce and repeat.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: And when I launched the podcast.
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: I was doing all that, but once I put the
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: episodes out, there was a feedback loop. It was all
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: about you engaging, interacting, fostering.
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: The Pretty Smart team, the community.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: I never experienced anything like it, and that's where Squarespace
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: comes in. Squarespace provides me with the infrastructure to build
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: upon the community that the podcast has cultivated. Once the
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: pod goes out, it's my lifeline to what you like,
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: what you don't like. I love getting messages about the episodes,
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: hearing your reflections are favorite moments from the guests. They
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: come right to my phone from the contact box. Squarespace
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: also allows you to take it a step further with
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: email campaigns.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: Once people are in touch with you, you can transform.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: Those interactions into email subscribers. When I launched the Pretty
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: Smart limited edition sweatshirts, I started with a Squarespace email template,
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: customized it with my brand logo and colors and press
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: sen and the platform has built in analytics, so I
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: measure the impact of every email in message to learn
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: where the site visits and sales are coming from. That
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: means I can determine what's working and what I can
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: work on. Squarespace acts is my community hub. The all
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: in one platform is my lifeline to my pretty smart people.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: Head to squarespace dot com slash pretty smart for a
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: free trial, and when you're ready to launch, use offer
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: code pretty Smart to save ten percent off your first
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: purchase of a website or domain. Your new comedy special
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: is called Good Fortune. Yes, and I was so excited
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: that it was filmed in Chicago. Yeah, your first one
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: was in North Carolina, where you were from, so that
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: made sense.
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: But this one why Chicago.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: Because I met my now wife in Chicago seven years ago.
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: I gay Pride, So a lot of the set I
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: end up talking about our relationship and how we met
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: and getting engaged and getting married. So because that set
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: focused a lot on that relationship, it just seemed to
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: make sense. Here's another personal connection to this set. There
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: were people in the audience that were there when we met,
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: and so I like having that kind of like it's
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: here because this means something.
• 17:17
  Speaker 4: This is a part of my life that was remainingful.
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: Whereas like North Carolina, a lot of those stories took
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: place growing up. This is like a big part of
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: my life going into adulthood.
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: Like I'm being an adult, I have a wife, and
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: this is where I'm at her.
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: Your mom seems like such a character.
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: She is. Some of my favorite jokes of yours have
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: to do with your family. Yeah, in particular your mother.
• 17:41
  Speaker 3: I know, I gotta I need to start thinking about
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: more of the crazy stuff she's done for my next acts.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: Well, when I do this podcast, I sometimes get calls
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: from my mom.
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: Oh really, you totally mischaracterized me. What does your mom
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: think about the jokes? Does she like being a part
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: of yourself?
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: Oh? Yeah, God, yes.
• 18:00
  Speaker 3: She tries to come to as many shows as she can,
• 18:02
  Speaker 3: like if they're anywhere that's in the vicinity of North Carolina,
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: she'll try to want to come because she knows I'm
• 18:09
  Speaker 3: probably gonna mention her at some point, and she just
• 18:12
  Speaker 3: likes me and talked about She's.
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: Looking around like that's me. You know. She likes that attention.
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: She was on our podcast a lot, so she, you know,
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: had people become very invested in her.
• 18:24
  Speaker 4: What she loves.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: Do people come up to her, Oh.
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure. She's involved in the gay community back
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: home as far as an ally. You know, so a
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: lot of young gay people will seek her out at
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: things and be like, you know, thank you for your
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: support of the community, and it's really special to see that. Occasionally,
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: once in a bloo moment, she'll be like, I didn't
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: think that was funny. You should not be sharing that
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: about my life. But mostly she's very much on board.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: People who haven't seen this, can you tell us a
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: little bit about her denying her love Hooters?
• 19:01
  Speaker 4: Well?
• 19:02
  Speaker 3: Am I Sweet and Salty special that's on Netflix currently.
• 19:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: I told this whole story about how you know, she
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: evolved too as I did. She went through a bit
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: of a transition after my parents got divorced, where she
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: was dating different men, and one of the men that
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: she dated was very conservative, and I grew up in
• 19:22
  Speaker 3: a house that was very like whatever. We were like
• 19:26
  Speaker 3: eating at Hooters from the time I was like seven
• 19:29
  Speaker 3: and then now and they have.
• 19:31
  Speaker 4: Really good wings.
• 19:32
  Speaker 3: And now that she was dating this new man, suddenly
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: those things that were chill and cool growing up were
• 19:40
  Speaker 3: no longer chill and cool. So I was suggesting we
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: go eat at Hooters, and in front of her man friend,
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: she was like, ah, half never eating at Hooters. And
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: it was one of those stories that I was like,
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: is anyone gonna think this is funny?
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: But me?
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: Because to me it was insane and I just ended
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: up telling it on stage and people got such a
• 20:09
  Speaker 3: kick out of it because she was so like, I.
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: Have never eating there, and you know it.
• 20:18
  Speaker 3: So I loved I loved telling that storry. People will
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: still come to my shows just yelling hooters.
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: So good.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: I've seen it like four times now, I still giggle.
• 20:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's very it's a very true story. She was.
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: He was beside her, and she's all like smiling at
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: him and be like giving me that stink of.
• 20:36
  Speaker 4: Like don't you dare? Don't you dare? Tell him I
• 20:40
  Speaker 4: eat it? Hoooters.
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: I do not needless to say she has a new
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: man in her life.
• 20:45
  Speaker 4: She's single now. Oh okay, this one did not last.
• 20:49
  Speaker 4: I don't know. I don't know why.
• 20:51
  Speaker 3: She wasn't me and her true self clearly, but yeah,
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: that one ended a while ago.
• 20:56
  Speaker 4: But yeah, she's single. So if you know, many old
• 20:58
  Speaker 4: guys love me.
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: She likes how old, how southern? What are our stipulations here?
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: Well, she's seventy six, so I mean, you don't want
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: to go too much older. It's dicey, you know, because
• 21:11
  Speaker 3: then sometimes don't live as long as the lady.
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: So she needs somebody that's gonna outlive her. I think
• 21:16
  Speaker 4: she should go like seventy.
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she's a young spirit.
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: I ha, Yeah, like seventy. She had me like a
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: sixty year old that's not get crazy. She walked slow,
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: but seventy.
• 21:26
  Speaker 3: I think she could have some fun with enjoy this
• 21:29
  Speaker 3: twilight part of her years.
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: So you worked on the Mindy Project.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: That is such a beloved show, another kind of like
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: cult fan favorite show. What was your favorite sort of
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: memory from that set?
• 21:45
  Speaker 4: Oh? Man, I love that show.
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: It was so fun to film, and the writing was
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: always good. I never saw a script where I was
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: like they phoned it in because she's such a writer
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: and the writer's room was a very coveted place for her.
• 21:59
  Speaker 3: But the cast, you know, they were three seasons in
• 22:01
  Speaker 3: already when I joined.
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: They already knew each other well.
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: But they were so welcoming and lovely, and I just
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: was always smiling and laughing.
• 22:10
  Speaker 4: I didn't realize how good I had a you know,
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: because that.
• 22:12
  Speaker 3: Was my first series regular role, and I was like,
• 22:15
  Speaker 3: every set must be this awesome, and that is not
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: the case. But yeah, I remember the finale, we did
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: this big dance and so a bunch of us had
• 22:25
  Speaker 3: to go to like a choreographers and stuff for a
• 22:27
  Speaker 3: couple of weeks and just seeing like Ike Baron Holtz
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: do these moves and it was that was really special.
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: But there was Yeah, a lot of good memories from that.
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: These were some really lovely words. I just want to
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: quote you back to you. Oh no, okay, because so
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: much of your special is about love, and you say
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: I went many years not having it. Those early years
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: was because I didn't know I was gay and I
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: was trying to be something I'm not. It's an awful
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: feeling thinking you weren't worthy of it. I would pray
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: that I'd one day find it, and in the meantime,
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: I worked on loving myself.
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: How his finding love, I was.
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: Like, I got really deep on Instagram, like, oh wow,
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: you were like, all right.
• 23:06
  Speaker 4: Can you just show us what you're reading for breakfast now?
• 23:09
  Speaker 4: You had a moment I did. Sometimes I like to
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: be sincere, you know, and just be real with people.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: I recently heard someone say I didn't find love, I
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: earned it, Oh interesting, which I thought was kind of wonderful,
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: because when you work on yourself and you love yourself, Yeah,
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: it does feel like you earned it. How has finding
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: love transformed your life?
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: Well, I think I think about now that I'm in
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: a relationship and I haven't for seven years, I still.
• 23:35
  Speaker 4: Try to remember what it was like to not have that.
• 23:39
  Speaker 3: Because I remember how frustrating it was as a single person.
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: Like once people found their person, they got married, they
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: acted like they were some expert genius on love and
• 23:51
  Speaker 3: the rest of us were doing it wrong. And that
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: didn't feel right to me, you know. So I try
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: to remember what that feeling felt like. And so when
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: I say the things about it took the long time
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: to find I think I'm trying to tell people like
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: I got lucky that I've found it, but there were
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: many years I didn't have it, So I'm not doing
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: something that.
• 24:12
  Speaker 4: You're not, you know what I mean.
• 24:14
  Speaker 3: It was more of just like kind of encouraging people
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: to like be patient and that hopefully that will come
• 24:22
  Speaker 3: for you, you know, because.
• 24:23
  Speaker 4: I remember what an awful feeling it was to not
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: have it.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And I didn't want to suddenly feel like make
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: it seem like, well, now I have all the answers.
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: I did something right and you didn't. You know, I
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: just got lucky. I got lucky.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: That I found somebody and that we clicked, and that
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: she loved me and I loved her, and that it works, you.
• 24:43
  Speaker 4: Know, and not everyone's so lucky, you know, fortune, that's right.
• 24:48
  Speaker 3: But I want that for people, you know, I want
• 24:50
  Speaker 3: them to find that, but also know that sometimes it
• 24:53
  Speaker 3: takes a while to find it, and I don't take
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: it for granted, and I don't forget what that felt
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: like to not have it. I'm just like a little
• 25:01
  Speaker 3: reminder of like we're kind of all in this together,
• 25:03
  Speaker 3: you know.
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: I think that's really nice.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, my last question, I always pull a card
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: from the car.
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: Okay, all right, there's two questions. Am I answer both
• 25:12
  Speaker 4: of them? Yeah? It says do you fall in love easily?
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: I don't fall in love easily.
• 25:17
  Speaker 3: I only have fallen in love once with my wife,
• 25:22
  Speaker 3: and that actually did come easy because she's awesome.
• 25:24
  Speaker 4: So that was kind of love at first sight for me.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: Not for her.
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: I had to win her over.
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: It's part of the second podcast.
• 25:33
  Speaker 3: And then it says what is your love language? Probably
• 25:36
  Speaker 3: words of affirmation and physical touch.
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: I can't believe that out of the fifty two questions,
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: you chose the only one about love that's wild.
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: It's good fortune truly October twenty fifth on Netflix. Find
• 25:49
  Speaker 3: out more about my love language. Also, cake, cake is
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: my love language. When my wife is me cake. It's
• 25:56
  Speaker 3: beautiful with kind of cake, any kind. Really, I'm not
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: I'm not a cake nob.
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: All right, today is a good day. To have a
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: good day.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: I'll see you next week