Latest / Deeply Well with Devi Brown / Radical Friendship

Transcript

Radical Friendship · Deeply Well with Devi Brown

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Mm from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl in
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: backs of diamond eyed school children who growing into hymnals
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments
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  Speaker 1: out of the windows of restored Alchemedo chariots to keep
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: the warmth of their blood. Be wise, be smart, being black,
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: Opal Brown courts bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: Jim see King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife,
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: wife told her daughter, and daughter told the as this is.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: And the ancestors told me that you would come to
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: give wisdom. Thousands. They said you would come Dropping Dropping Jim. Hey,
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: welcome to the Dropping Jim's Podcast. I am your host,
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: Debbie Brown. Big shout out to everyone that's a first
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: time listener. Welcome, Thank you for joining. This is a
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: space where we explore higher consciousness for your real life,
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: and we really lovingly explore our shadow work. Try on
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: some different self care tools and here beautiful perspective from
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: people all across the spectrums of well being and also
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: connecting deeper on my personal journey, your personal journey, and
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: finding all the common ties in between. So welcome back
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: to another episode. If you have been joining us for
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: this wild ride of dropping Jim's welcome back. Thank you
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: so much for listening. Huge shout out to everyone that
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: has listened to the show, connected with it, and then
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: gone that extra step by subscribing or leaving a written
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: review in our iTunes store. So so grateful. And if
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: you have a chance, and if you have the bandwidth
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: for it, I would really appreciate if you took a
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: second takes about sixty seconds tops um, to do that
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: today and share it with a friend. Any episode that
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: really felt resonant to you, I think sometimes, you know,
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: we think that we are in this isolated experience. I've
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: recently been exploring some deepening conversations with one of my
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: best friends, and you know, there are so many things
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: that we were each processing individually at the same time
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: but didn't know because we didn't talk about it. So,
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: if there was an episode that really resonated on your heart,
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: whether it's today's or an episode that you heard earlier. UM,
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: I highly suggest really in meditation or just taking a
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: moment with your eyes closed, see who pops up first
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: in your head. Send that person the show, or send
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: someone you think could put stentially dive a little deeper,
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: would enjoy this, you know, start some of those conversations.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: When we think about the idea of building community, UM,
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: we often think of it as so far outside of ourselves,
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  Speaker 1: like we're waiting for all of these new people to
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  Speaker 1: show up. And in actuality, there is some really beautiful opportunity,
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: especially now coming out of this pandemic, so many people
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  Speaker 1: have deepened their journey with themselves. There's this really gorgeous
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: opportunity to chisel and refine and elevate some relationships that
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: we do already have access to. So just a little something,
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: all right, today's episode? Okay. A couple of months ago,
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: I had a chance to go on the podcast almost thirty.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: It is a wildly successful podcast. They have four hundred
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: plus episodes over twenty million downloads UM. It's been held
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: as the best wellness podcast to listen to right now
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: by covetre Lots and lots of awards and recognition. It's
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: it's an amazing show and and I had the chance
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: to be a guest on it. UM, so I have
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: an episode on there that you guys can check out.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: I fell in love with the conversation and I feel
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  Speaker 1: that I'm really in a season right now. Well God has.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: God has continuously blessed me um with finding like minded
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  Speaker 1: people really easily and beautifully. But I'm in I'm in
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  Speaker 1: a supercharged season right now where I am really drawn
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: to specific people and I feel this really natural magnetism
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: between each of us. And I've been exploring so many
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: gorgeous conversations by just following my heart in that space
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: leading me to new friends. So, UM, don't listen to
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: Drake's song no new friends. UM, if you want to
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: stay stuck, stay there. But there's so much opportunity to
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: grow and expand, and so that's what it felt like
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  Speaker 1: happened after I did that episode of Almost thirty. The hosts,
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  Speaker 1: Krista Williams and Lynn the Simok are brilliant, just absolutely
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  Speaker 1: brilliant women, and I have loved getting to know them
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: and so they're hopping on my show. They are very
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  Speaker 1: self aware, highly highly processed, which is a trait I
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  Speaker 1: love in my friendships and in people. Uh. And they
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  Speaker 1: are just forging, um so many gorgeous new paths and
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  Speaker 1: building powerful community and building powerful tools, and they're just amazing.
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  Speaker 1: So I'm excited to have them on my show. We
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: have a lot to talk about quickly. I want to
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  Speaker 1: kind of give you a little back in look um
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: at the fullness of some of the things that these
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: amazing women have been creating and been doing. So give
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: you a little background Krista. She is the co founder
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: of Almost thirty, a top fifty podcast, a global brand
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: in community. With a background and digital marketing, sales and
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  Speaker 1: strategy at Fortune on hundred Companies, Krista left the corporate
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  Speaker 1: world behind to build Almost thirty from the ground up
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  Speaker 1: alongside her best friend and co host Lindsay. Since its
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: inception in it's grown to over twenty million downloads, been
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  Speaker 1: nominated for so many incredible awards, and Kristin Lindsley lead
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  Speaker 1: worldwide events, digital workshops, and a membership program to support
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  Speaker 1: their communities conscious evolution. She's also the co founder of
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  Speaker 1: podcast pro, a comprehensive program to help others create their
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  Speaker 1: dream podcast. So if anybody if it's been on your
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: heart to create that dream podcast Check that out. And
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  Speaker 1: Chris is also the creator of It's Krista, which provides
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  Speaker 1: an honest take on health, wellness, spirituality, and style. Leading
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  Speaker 1: speaker on so many topics and just overall badass. Lindsay
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  Speaker 1: is the co founder of Almost thirty as well, and
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  Speaker 1: she began her career as an actress and a singer
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  Speaker 1: in Boston in New York City, which, if you follow
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: your story her stories, you see like just that amense
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  Speaker 1: tal it in that way radiating through. And she has
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: also been a fit model and senior Soul cycle instructor,
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: which led her to her greatest creative endeavor, which has
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: been Almost thirty, which I shared with you. She's also
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: the co founder of podcast pro and she's a leading
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: speaker in all things wellness, and she actually just launched
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: this really beautiful program called Sacred Singleness Um that is
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: all about like deepening your spiritual journey while you're single. So,
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: without further ado, two of my new favorite favorite favorite
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  Speaker 1: human beings, welcome to the show. You're just practicing the
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: dev trot breaking rock baby. I literally could not keep
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: taking my eyes off of you. Oh my god, so
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: literally everybody. I gotta tell you guys. First of all,
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: Lindsay and CHRISTI are so amazing. I was on their show.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: It is one of the most amazing podcast episodes I
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: feel like I've ever done. Like we hit on so much.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: And then the response that I was getting in the
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: d M s from this and the messages, I was
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: just like, Wow, we really went there. They have this
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: phenomenal space. I mean, they are a wildly as I've shared,
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: a wildly successful podcast. So I mean the space reflects it.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: It's money, money, money, and it's like very gorgeous and um,
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: it's just perfect. And so they were so incredibly generous
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: and allowing with our studio that I typically record at
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: being shut down because of the covid um with letting
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: me come to their space and record. So I am
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: actually using their equipment. I'm in their phenomenal space. I'm
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: so happy you're here. It feels like it feels like
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: when you were on the Push, just like this little,
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: this little bubble where we're kind of well, we'll see
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: you guys in three hours. But when we first sat down,
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: we were laughing. You know, you guys know I have
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: a radio background and I was talking to them about it,
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: and so we did like a little rehash of that
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: and I did my little radio spiel all right, coming
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: up next. I literally love it. I'm like, because it's
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: so it's just so you're amazing. Thank you guys. So
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: something that you know, you the three of us were
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: at my house a couple of weeks ago. We're having
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: an epic dinner and UM, we had really got into
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  Speaker 1: this really interesting conversation about women empowerment UM, and especially
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: about I guess the different stages of it or sometimes um,
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: the presentation of it that doesn't always feel real. So
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: I want to I definitely want us to get into
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: that UM and to get into some more of those
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: pieces of like what it is to be so spiritually
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  Speaker 1: awakened and in these streets you know, Um, what it
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: is to date from that awakened space, I think is
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: so fascinating because you each our love and you found
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: such beautifully equally yoked relationships, right, And I think for
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  Speaker 1: so many people, especially women listeners of this show, listeners
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  Speaker 1: of your show, you know, sometimes it feels really isolating
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  Speaker 1: when you become awakened and when you really begin to heal,
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  Speaker 1: because you notice how many people are not, you know,
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  Speaker 1: and then it's like, oh, well, I ever find someone
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  Speaker 1: that speaks that language to me. I think that's like
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  Speaker 1: our number one question from our girls are like I'm
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  Speaker 1: on my path, but my man isn't. And then they
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  Speaker 1: want to know what to do. They're like, I'm interested
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  Speaker 1: in these things, but my person isn't. And I think
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  Speaker 1: we've probably got all in that path. And it's like
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  Speaker 1: the spirituality is so important, but you don't. It's also
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  Speaker 1: part of the spirituality to let the person be on
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  Speaker 1: whatever path they're on, you know, it to sort of
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  Speaker 1: encourage them to be who they are more so than
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  Speaker 1: be like you should be doing yoga with me. You
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: should be doing this with me, because there's like a
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  Speaker 1: part of your process where spirits where you awaken. You're like, yes,
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  Speaker 1: everyone needs to know about this. This is the best
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  Speaker 1: I feel so connected. I am God, And you're like
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  Speaker 1: everyone should awaken, and you then over time realized and
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: it sort of settles in your system that it's not
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  Speaker 1: really your place to be the one that's awakening everyone.
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  Speaker 1: Everyone's in their own divine timing. So yeah, it's huge.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: I mean that's such a powerful topic and um, I'm
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: excited to talk more about it. Yeah, and you know,
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: let's okay. So first let's start here. Um, where are
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: you each from individually and give us, give us your
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: elevator of how you met each other and how you connected.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: So I'm from Ohio, small town, small town in Ohio.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: Baby and Lindsay and I met at Soul Cycle. So
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: I was auditioning to be an instructor. When I was
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: in New York, I was working in corporate jobs and
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: I was just so unfulfilled. I was like so desperate
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: to find a purpose. Like I was like, I know
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: that I'm here for a reason, and I really want
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: to find it. And it was so it caused me
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: so much anguish because I was so dead set on
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: figuring out what that was. And I went from corporate
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: job to corporate job. I was successful in the corporate world,
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: but I was really deeply unhappy. And so when I
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: found Soul Cycle, I was like, yo, I really love this.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: I'm using my body, I love the music, I love
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: the community, I love being a leader, and I want
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: to audition. So I did everything I could to like
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: audition for Soul Cycle. I didn't get it. I didn't
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: get my first audition, and so what I did in
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: the meantime to audition again was UM, went and got
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: vocal lessons uptown. So every like Wednesday at my corporate job,
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: I would go uptown and get voice lessons because I
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: was trying to be better on the microphone at Soul Cycle,
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: because being on the microphone made me so uncomfortable. I
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: felt so uncomfortable. So I was getting these voice lessons,
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: I was preparing all these things, and I was like,
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  Speaker 1: I need to connect with an instructor to help me
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: with my second audition, and Lindsay ended up being that instructor.
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  Speaker 1: She helped me with my second Soul Cycle audition, which
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: I didn't get and then UM, from that point, you know,
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: we were connected and we were both going through these
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: transitions that so many people go through in your late twenties,
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: where your prefrontal core texas coming online, your Saturn return
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: is happening, and you're really becoming conscious of how you
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: are in a specific role in your life and how
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: um your parents have impacted you, your relationships. There's a
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: lot of things happening, and so we kind of commiserated
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: on these transitions and how upset I was that I
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: didn't feel like I had a purpose, and she was
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: going through her own relationship transitions and we're like, you know,
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: we can't be the only ones. I feel like people
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: talk about when you graduate from college and they're like, oh,
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: the real world, Like welcome to the real world. And
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: that's a really hard transition. But I feel like your
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: later twenties, when things get really real, felt like it
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: was even more. It was even harder, like the decisions
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: had more weight, it felt like. So we started to
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: record our conversations and then you know, five years later
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  Speaker 1: we have a beautiful show and community and all this stuff,
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: and it's beautiful because I feel like I found my purpose,
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: you know, through it all. I have some questions about
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: Soul Cycle, But Lindsay person, I would love um for
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: a little bit of your background. Yeah. So I grew
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: up in a small town in Pennsylvania, just north of Philadelphia,
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: and yeah, I mean I was a performer of my
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: whole life, you know, kind of a theater kid, and UM,
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: just fast forward to that life in New York where
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: after college I was like, I want to pursue Broadway
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: and so UM, knowing that, I was like, well, I
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: have to get a bartending job, like you know, knowing
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: like you know, artists who are auditioning during the day,
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: how do they support themselves? They bartend. Um. Obviously there
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: are other jobs, but that's what I chose. And um,
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: so I was working at night and um auditioning during
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: the day, and I had a bunch of different jobs,
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: and UM, it was it was hard because I was
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: in my you know, mid twenties and like struggling and
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: super poor, but also really passionate about what I wanted
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: to do. UM and expressing myself is like my my
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: life blood, you know, like it just makes me feel
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: so alive. So um that always kept me on my path.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: And then, um, yeah, as Krista mentioned, I just went
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: through this like pretty intense breakup where the person I
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: thought I was gonna be with forever I just felt
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: completely disconnected from and and you know, it is kind
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: of that breaking point of Wow, I just feel like
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: my soul speaking so loudly, wanting to like work with
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: me in in evolving and actually pursuing and doing what
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: I truly desire and really just being who I really am,
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: because within that relationship, I wasn't who I really was. Um,
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: and am because I was kind of operating on what
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: I thought he wanted me to be, and so I
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: ended up cheating on him and just kind of like
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: throwing some gasoline on the entire relationship. And it was
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: really painful because I would never have expected myself to
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: do that. It was kind of this weird out body
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: experience where I'm like, my soul was so clear that
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: I had to move on, but like human Lindsay was like,
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: I don't know how to do that. I don't know
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: how to have a healthy conversation with him, Like I
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: don't know what that looks like. So I just kind
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: of sabotaged the whole thing. And um. And so after that,
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: I was I was pretty you know, I was kind
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: of in a depressed state like season of my life
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: because I just felt so disconnected from myself and UM.
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: During that time, I started to go to sol cycle.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: Eventually I became an instructor, and then they moved me
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: out here to l A. And that was really the
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: big event of my saddurn return was the move from
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: l A to New York, which really changed everything. I
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: felt like I could breathe, like I felt like, you know,
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: I just felt um, yeah, less of this, less of
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: this pressure to um be chosen in New York. And
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: I was like, okay, I'm going to take time like
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: I was actually chosen to come out to l A
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: by sol Cycle, I can kind of define this new
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: chapter of my life for myself instead of waiting to
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: be picked and cast or whatever. And it was just
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: a really beautiful beginning which eventually lead me to Christa.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: When we met at sole Cycle and I just felt like, Wow,
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: we're having these deep conversations and it feels really good,
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: you know, simple deep conversations. I was like, ah, okay,
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: so I'm not alone, Like I don't have to just
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: do this all by myself, right and and so um
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: when we started the podcast, I'm always down to start
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: creative ventures, and I was like, let's do it. We
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: can record in my closet, your closet, and we'll just
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: figure it out, you know, And and that's what we did.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: The thing that really stands out for me is just
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: the power of really having these intentional friendships, you know,
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: like like friendships that honor us where we're at in
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: the moment and that are also the catalysts for more
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: you know, friendships that allow for that kind of chiseling
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: and refinement to happen. And when I I've I've had
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: the pleasure of being able to experience to you both
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: and your friendship dynamic in person quite a lot. Um.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: I know I shared this earlier, but I came on
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: the show and we just kind of all fell in
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: love with each other, and maybe maybe I just about
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: it the whole podcast. I welcome start every show with
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: the girls. You know, It's like, the thing that's so
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: really breathtaking to me about both of you is how
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: processed you each are, and that that's rare. I mean
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: it's really really rare, rare. I am a highly processed being.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: I am so processed. I am always so blissfully deep
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: in my shadow work and just you know, really, um
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: and I really strive to be in a surrendered space,
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: and you guys are much the same. The second someone
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: meets you, it's like, oh God, the work they've done it,
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: they know it by heart, they can teach it. You know,
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: how does that like establishing that kind of connection Because
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: I think for a lot of people, and definitely a
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: lot of a lot of listeners of this show, you know,
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: the pieces I know I'm awake. I know I want
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: more for me. I know there's healing to be done.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: How do I start surrounding myself with more people like
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: me or more people that can be a mirror for
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: me or aid me. And that's that's the piece that
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: gets really challenging and sometimes gets people stuck. So what
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: was that journey of you guys looking towards one another
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: and coming together outside of that that initial structure and
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: system of soul cycle. Yeah, and just a few things.
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: I want to answer that a few things. And you said,
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: it's like people say they want the mirror, but then
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: they get the mirror. And then because I know that
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: even within my intimate partnership with my fiance, it's like
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: I want the mirror, and then the mirror shown and
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: then I'm like, oh baby, this is bothering me. So
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: I think that's a point. And then on the work,
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: it's like, I think we do the work, you do
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: the work. And I noticed that the people that are
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: doing the most work don't talk about the work. They're like,
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: they're kind of it's literally part of the process of life. Um.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: But for our relationship, you know, one of the key
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: parts was meeting ourselves deeper in process than if we
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: were younger, or if we were in college or we
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: were right out of college, because that was actually something
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: that was really bothering me. When I moved to l A.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: I had shame around the fact that I had lived
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: in Ohio, Chicago, New York, and then l A. And
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: that I was having these friends that I was meeting
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: later in life, that I was having deep relationships with
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: people when I was older and I didn't carry a
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: lot of friends from I have a lot of friends
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: from college, and I have like one friend from home,
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: and I felt a lot of shame. I'm like, should
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: I have friends forever? Should I have all these friends
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: forever from home? Like should I be someone that has
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: this deep intimate relationship with tons of people at home?
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: And I realized, how, you know, coming fresh with Lindsay,
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: it's like I'm showing you who I am today, and
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: we're working with who I aspire to be. We're not
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: looking back to like the person that I was in college,
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: the person that I was outside of college, because she's
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: amazing and she exists, but like I'm able to start
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: fresh with her and just really be like showing up
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: as my best self and then we can build from there.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: And so when people have friendships later in life or
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: they have these relationships, it's almost like you can have
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: a new expectation of people. And I always felt limited
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: by my friends that I met earlier on because they
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: had this expectation of me to be this thing. And
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: when someone's in process, like they are from a lot
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: from my hometown in Ohio, there's a lot of projections,
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of limiting, there's a lot of um
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: unconscious behavior. So having a new friendship with conscious behavior
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: has been so powerful. But we've had we are mirrors
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: of each other, and we've had to lean in all
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: the time, and we've had to really do the work
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: together even when it's uncomfortable. But it's been, you know,
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: some of the most fulfilling work that I've ever done
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: in my life. To be truly seen is incredibly uncomfortable.
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: You know. It's like I find that with you know,
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: between us in romance relationships and even like with our community,
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: like to be truly seen, it's beautiful and can be
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: incredibly It's like new skin your or lack of that
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: kind of shell. And and also even the letting yourself
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: be seen that mechanism is such an interesting piece to play.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: So much resistance we're noticing, you know, where is there
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: against nous or where is there any any subliminal thoughts
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: of unworthiness or not enoughness? And it's usually a reflection
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: of like, have I witnessed myself in that way? You know?
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: Am I comfortable witnessing myself in that way? Yeah? It's
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: been beautiful, Lindsay especially, it's like she's made her um
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: you know, some of the things that we've talked about.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: I have my issues and not just bringing up hers
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: for ships, but it's like codependency and then um, like
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: we both struggle with abandoning ourselves that we're very cutely
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: aware of now and she's made those like her superpower
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: in a way where it's like she's very much able
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: to come into conversations and be like abandoned herself enough
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: to like let whatever is coming to surface come without
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: judgment or without projections. So it's like getting herself out
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: of the room, getting the ego out of the room.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: And you know, for the parts of our relationship that
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: have been hard, it's not like it's been fun, but
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: it's been really rewarding. And I didn't even realize that
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: with other relationships. It only got to the part where
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: I wasn't I was done faking it in a way,
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: and I realized it was like they were friends with
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: my mask. They were friends with my ego like I have.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: And this happens all the time. It's like, people can
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: be friends with your ego. People can be friends with
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: the projection that you portray. And when you really get
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: down to it and you go past the mask, you
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: go past the ego, It's like that's when true connection comes.
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: And I realized for most of my life, I've been
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: really projecting a person, and it was very subtle. I'm
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: very real and authentic, and when people meet me, they're
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: truly meeting the real me. But there are times where
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: I would abandon myself or like just kind of have
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: to make someone feel good. I'd make it all about them.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: I'd sort of focus on them, and so did not
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: do that was like such a shift for me. What
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: was one of the early conversations in the establishment of
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: your friendship and what this would become that you guys
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: remember was kind of like a moment where it felt
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: okay to be naked in front of each other. I
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: know there have been many, but I'm thinking of like
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: almost are in in our coaching sessions with Arin, there
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: just have been so many moments where within that container
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: of our with our coach Aaron rose Um, because we
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: are there for that purpose to connect and like kind
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: of unravel something's going on, it just feels super super
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: safe and guided, which is helpful, and like we're really
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: a both too, yeah, witness one another. And I think,
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: you know, one of the conversations I remember was around
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: the fact that we are um such a beautiful mirror
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: and catalyst for each other's growth, you know, Like I
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: was talking to my I'm doing a program right now,
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: and I was saying that, like I just feel like
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: we're each other's duels, you know, like we really serve
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: as like one and especially as women, I just feel
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: like we serve as each other's support and guides and
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: we're not trying to do it for them, but we're
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: just there to kind of hold. And I really feel
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: that with with Krista, both in our personal friendship and
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: sisterhood and past lifetimes and our business relationship, like we
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: really do balance each other out, We support one another,
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: We communicate telepathically, it's just this really beautiful system of
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: of support. I think the first years of the podcast though,
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: was like really there was like a low level of
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: anxiety between us a lot of the time because we
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: were both working full time jobs and we were both
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: just so stressed out, and I was like so like
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: obsessed with this and I just was like so taken
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: by it. I was like just wanting to just make
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: it happen. And it was always sort of like this
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: push pull of like who's going to do this, who's
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: going to do that, Like there's a lot of unknowns
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: building the business, and so that actually diffused, you know,
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: a few years into having the hard conversations and being like, hey,
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: I'm feeling this way, how are you feeling? Like the
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: story that I'm telling myself is that you're trying to
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: control me or you're not doing enough or whatever that is.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: And then you can always go back in therapy. We
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: could do therapy on our own and be like peeled
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: that back, like I'm feeling like this, like what is
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: that saying about me? For me? I have a lot
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: of issues around trust with women. I have like trust
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: because of the way that I grew up and abandonment
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: issues as well, So I always sort of view things
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: that happened or trigger is that happened in our relationship
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: from that lens, and so then I can always sort
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: of process back, like, Okay, when did I feel abandoned
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: when I was younger? And like how is this triggering
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: that little girl for me? Like how is she feeling
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: abandoned again? And how am I feeling like Oh my god,
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: I'm scared she's gonna hurt me. I'm scared she's gonna
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: you know, I'm scared she's going to judge me. Or
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: I'm scared she's gonna, you know, not tell me the
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: truth or something. And so the awareness of self is
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: so important because it helps you be in relationship with
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: people so much clearer. So when lindsay we're separating for
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: the move, it's like I can feel my abandonment like,
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm gonna be abandoned, I'm going to
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: be alone, And now I can really work with the
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: energy of feeling frustrated much better. So that piece I
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: want to sit there for a second because you know
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: this is part of your process, and so instantaneously I'm like, oh, yes, yes,
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: oh my god, but I think what you just expressed
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: is actually, for so many listening a beautiful blueprint for
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: the experience of becoming more self aware. And so it's really,
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: you know, when we speak to like self inquiry or
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: that self investigation in real time, that's what it looks like.
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: It looks like I feel a charge in my chest,
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: in my body, or somewhere, I'm noticing a shifting that
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: is not comfortable. How can I sit with myself for
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: that moment and investigate that feeling before I react, or
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: before I potentially unload on a friend, on a family
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: member or so on. But it's like it looks like that,
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: and it's that quick, you know. And I think when
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: we think about doing the work, you know what the
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: work is when you haven't started it or you haven't
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: necessarily found your groove in it. Yet it does feel
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: like this enormous mountain. It feels like the mid term
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: you didn't study for that. You're always coming up a
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: little bit short, you know, we're always I wanted to
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: be better, I'm not quite doing it. It seems like
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: more opportunity to self criticize. But what it really is
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: is just a few reflective questions in the moment with
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: no judgment either way, With no judgment either way, like
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: what you just expressed, It's like okay, and I really
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: want I really want to frame it um around what
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: you said powerfully, which is like, Okay, the story I'm
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: telling myself is this. So if you are in a
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: conflict with a friend, with someone in your life and
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: you're like, I'm feeling unappreciated, well, the truth is is
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: that true? Is that fact? Have you actually been able
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: to establish with proof and with conversation that that's a fact?
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: Or is it an assumption? Most likely it's an assumption.
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: So if it's an assumption, why would I assume that first? Right? Okay, Well,
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: I think I assume that first because of my past
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: and because of how I feel about myself and because
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: of things that have been in my history. Do I
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: have to apply that lens to this moment? You know?
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: And I kind of want to really illustrate that right
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: now into take that second to unpack it, because that
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: is those are the fibers of how this work actually
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: operates and how it changes your life. And I think
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: that this piece of it that you guys are speaking
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: to does not get spoken about enough. Everyone wants to
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: take well being to the point of like, okay, what
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: is self care? You know, what can I what can
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: I do? Okay, I'm gonna do the yoga, I'm gonna
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: do the meditation. But the deepest parts of self care
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: are the granular shadow work. It's the really personalized experience
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: of investigating your own thoughts and seeing when you're not
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: always truthful with yourself, or when you have those old
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: loops of programming, you know, moving through your being. That's
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: so so powerful. It's being so present that you're able
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: to take that moment and I always forget that, you know,
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: in in doing those practices, that self inquiry in the moment,
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: that I can take time and space, you know. So
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: for example, you know, with family, in the moment, if
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: we're getting together and I feel you know, triggered in
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: some way, that I can create a bit of space.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: I don't need to react in the moment. I can
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: actually ask for what I need, which might be hey,
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: like I would love to have a conversation this week
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: about it. You know. That's just you know, like I
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: forget that I can actually ask for what I need,
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: that I can take time for a little self inquiry,
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: that I can reflect and not because otherwise I am
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: just being so reactive. Yeah, the expediency is the ego,
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: you know, the ego needs now, the ego needs now.
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: It's like I am unwell, i am unsafe because I'm
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: not getting something from you and people. You know. Operating now,
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: not people, but learning how to operate now from the
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: space of like radical responsibility for my emotions is so
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: rewarding and just makes everything so much better. But at
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: first it seems hard because you're like, okay, so I'm
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: responsible for my relationship not being up to part. My
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: friendships aren't really fulfilling, my job isn't my purpose, and
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: you know, it's taken me eight to ten years in
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: my awakening to sort of work through those but making
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: the small steps of awareness and sort of playing with
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: that voice in our head because we all have the
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: voice in our head that's consciousness, you know, and kind
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: of talking. The voice is not us, you know, it's
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: really the understanding within that higher consciousness that you hear
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: the voice you are. You are what is observing and
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: hearing the voice. You are, not the voice. That piece
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: it's like, oh, oh, this self talk thing has been
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: wrong the whole time, and That's why I you know,
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: I always say meditation is so important because that's where
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: you glimpse that, that's where you're able to really kind
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: of up outside of your own body, of your own self,
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: of your own human existence, and experience yourself as that
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: full or more vibrant, all encompassing energy that we are
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: when we come here. And I think taking the time
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: to like that thought that you were describing where you
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: ask if it's true? Is it? Can you prove that
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: it's true? And usually it's an assumption. It's like the
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: next step that I've been kind of trying out is like, okay,
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: let me try on what like the opposite of that
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: would be, and how how can I prove that that's true? Yes,
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: you know, and we don't think to kind of like
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: try on a new truth, um, because we've identified so
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: much with that other. And then it's like why are
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: we trying on truth? You know? It's like what I
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: love the phrasing you just used of the trying on truth.
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: But it's like when we take it even that step
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: deeper for each of us, like this is what self
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: inquiry is. Why am I wearing anything? Why am I
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: not just being? Why am I not just surrendered. Why
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: am I even thinking about it? I can just be
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: I can be in flow, you know, I can be love.
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: And I think with the assumptions thing too, it's like,
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: you know, a lot of times though I think with women,
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: especially the assumptions are wrong, but sometimes they're actually right. Yes,
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: And that's what's you know, really important too, is that
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: a lot of assumptions I've had about maybe stressed in
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: our relationship are completely right. She's feeling that, I'm feeling
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: that maybe it's my partnership. I'm kind of feeling like,
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: you know, we're not connecting. It's it's my intuition. And
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: so a lot of times that's what's important about the
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: self inquiries, like, Okay, these are the lenses that I
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: look at life at. I feel like I can't trust people.
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: I feel like, um, I'm too much for people. I
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: feel like I need to abandon myself to be loved. Okay,
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna keep an eye on those lenses, but also
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: I'm going to keep an eye on my is my
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: intuitive sense saying, what is my soul telling me that
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: this is safe? That these people you know, our love,
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: that they are being honest, And I can sort of
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: work with those and always check in with these um
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: the way in which I look through the world the
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: lenses and see like, is this happening or is my
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: intuition really just telling me something that I need to
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: be aware of, because I think so often a lot
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: of the anxiety that people have, and mostly women, is
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: around like their intuitions speaking to them and them not
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: really trusting it enough. So it's just this like discrepancy
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: in between the way that they're living their life and
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: what their intuition is. Like deeply trying to tell them
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: thank you for bringing that forward, because it really is
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: that delicate dance, right, because if we have spent our
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: entire lives really not fully clear or investigated with self,
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: it is also so easy to completely desecrate our intuition system,
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: you know. And so that's the byproduct of all the
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: times we don't trust ourselves and all the times that
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: we are not exploring our limiting beliefs are patterns what
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: our past has brought to the table. Then we completely
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: eradicate and destroy our internal GPS system. And so then
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: when we're trying to do the work and we're beginning
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: that felf inquiry, then we feel like we can't fully
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: even trust or that everything has to be spiritually bypassed
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: in some way, you know. And that was something you know,
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: I've had to learn a lot this year, was like,
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: my soul has an opinion, and my it's okay, I'm
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: not being judgmental. My soul has an opinion, Like this
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: relationship is not for you, is not judgmental. It's my
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: soul telling your preference, my preference. And I think there's
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: so much shame around around that because in the spirituality
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: world it should be like you know, it is love everyone,
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: treat everyone with respect, to be honest, be kind, but
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: also we shouldn't be tolerating situations, people, circumstances that aren't
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: for us, that aren't the best for us. And our
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: soul really knows the best on our path. So it's
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: like that balance to where you really don't you're not
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: being judgmental of people in a way that's unprocessed or
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: like spewing your um your shadow. But really the beauty
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: of like your soul having a preference. Yeah, And that's
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: and that's the piece too, that is it gets fun
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: to really play with because I remember when I when
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: I first started doing some of the work that idea.
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: I was like, okay, so what's the judgment. Well, no,
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: I don't want to judge. I don't want to be
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: in judgment. And then you know, the way it was
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: broken down to me was, you know, think of it
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: like ice cream, right, Like I don't like chocolate ice cream.
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: I don't hate it, I don't want to eat it.
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying anything is wrong with chocolate, and I'm
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: not saying you can't enjoy chocolate ice cream. I don't
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: like the taste. And that's my preference, you know. And
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: so it's like, even as we're looking through that lens
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: with the judgment of self or with the way we
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: feel about other people, people have unconditional love completely mixed up.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: I unconditionally love everyone. I also trust people to be themselves,
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: and I give them what they can handle of me
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: because I know what their boundaries are, and I know
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: what my boundaries are, and I also know what my
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: preferences are. I can, on a soul level, unconditionally love
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: someone and wish for them the life they deserve, but
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: it can also be my personal preference that I don't
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: enjoy our energy together or I don't think that it
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: is conducive to the life I want to live and
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: how I want to feel for us to be closely connected,
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: and it doesn't have to be beef. Yeah, I think,
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: especially as women, or at least in my experience, like
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: I feel so much responsibility for the other person's experience
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: in that moment because I'm if if I have a
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: preference and I'm very clear about it, I'm also thinking
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: about how are they going to receive it? And that's
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: not our responsibility to manage, but it's it's hard not to.
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: And that is the thing that I think, especially as women,
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: we say a lot it's it's the oh, but how
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: will they act? But are they going to feel bad?
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: That is between them and their life's curriculum. As long
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: as we're in integrity, right, I'm not saying go around
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: and tell someone, oh, you're full of it. But if
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: you're an integrity and you say, you know what, this
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: doesn't feel good for me. So I don't want to
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: be involved how someone else feels and react to that
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: is so about them and their process and all the
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: variables we know nothing about, even the ones we do
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: know about. It still doesn't have to change your choice
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: and your boundaries. Yeah, it's liberating, but it is challenging.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: I mean, you know, I almost but when women and
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: people have boundaries with me, I am like horned up.
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yo, you can't hang out like or you
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: can't do that, or like that's not working for you.
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: Like it's just such an attractive quality. Even I think too,
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: you have great boundaries like you. I was even telling Lindsay,
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: like you you are an open book, but you you
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: protect parts of yourself, parts of your experience and self
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: rightfully so and I really respect that. I was like,
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: oh damn, Like she reveals over time and it's really beautiful.
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: And I was thinking about that, how powerful that is. Um.
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: But just because you know we're talking all about this
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: doesn't mean it's really easy. Yeah, it's you know, it
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: doesn't mean it's easy. But I think compared to the alternative,
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: it actually is. You know, when I when I think
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: about what the alternative would be, which would be me
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: in any way disappointing myself, or me in any way
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: making a decision I knew I didn't want to make,
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: and then I have to eat the feelings of that
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: alone with me, and then project judgment onto myself. Nah,
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: and that's not serving anyone else, you know what I mean.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: I've learned that in friendship. I've learned that with my partner,
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: where like he's so attuned when I when I abandoned
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: myself and it's a complete turn off to him. He's like,
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: what are you doing? You know I can tell when
• 40:59
  Speaker 1: his energy shifts as he feels that, and it's beautiful
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: because it's such a mirror to me to remind me. Um.
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: But yeah, and it's also not serving them, Like for
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: you to kind of like for me to mold and
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: shift in order to satisfy and manage someone else's experience
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: is actually not serving their life curriculum so perfectly said, Yeah,
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: you're robbing them of their opportunity to And the thing
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: about you know, the way I experienced it's it's everything
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: is really based on that energetic exchange. Everything is about
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: an exchange. And you know something, I've had to get
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: stronger and as a woman, like with my boundaries. And
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: thank you for that reflection, because I love my boundaries.
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: I am a very boundary person and it has just
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: so positively informed my life in so many ways. It's
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: given me access to new layers of myself. I say
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: no freely, and I really came to the under standing,
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: you know, I was. I was telling people at work this.
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: I said, I'd rather disappoint you than disappoint myself. So
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: for me saying no disappoints you, you'll be okay. But
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: I'd rather you feel disappointed about something I'm not doing
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: for you than me feel disappointed about something I don't
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: want to do because it's a projection. Yeah, that's another
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: interesting thing coming into that, like experience of oh, I
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: am number one, my relationship with God and myself is
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: number one, and how our entire lives we've been programmed
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: to have everyone above ourselves and of God. It's like
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: the parents are number one, our friends are supposed to
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: be number one, our relationship is supposed to be number one,
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: you know, our job is supposed to be number one.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: And then when you kind of come back, you're like, oh,
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: that's not working. To have my friends be my God's
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: not working, to have my relationship, my God's not working,
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: to have my work be, my God's not working. Okay,
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: So I need to be my own in relationship with God,
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: and I need to be my own number one over anything,
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: and it's not selfish. It's like the most important relationship
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: ever and I've had to really step into that this
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: year as well. Yeah, and that's the point, right, It's
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: like we are all, in a non narcissistic way the
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: stars of our lives and everyone else is a supporting
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: character in what our life story is, and the same
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: we're supporting characters and other people's lives. But we can't.
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: You know, I believe that a core tentt of being
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: a human is showing up in service to humanity. I
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: can't do that unless I have shown up in service
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: to myself first period. And you know, throughout human history
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: we have trained women and all humans, but especially women. Golly,
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: we have had so many weights on our shoulders. Um
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: since the dawn of time. We have been trained to
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: think that our discomfort is and should be normal, and
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: that we should always be subjugated to be in service
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: to others and to be in a a system of martyrdom,
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: you know. And I feel so grateful that in this
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: moment in time, the age of the multi hyphen it
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: multidimensional woman is here. You know. I want to be
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: my full self. I want to live life fully expressed
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: when I leave this earth, I want all of the
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: creativity that I had inside me laid out. M hm.
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: I remember and um, I don't know if it's the
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: eighties or nineties, but Oprah did an episode on UM
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: mothers putting themselves first. It was all about how moms
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: should put themselves first over their kids, and everyone in
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: the audience booed wow because everyone was like, no, kids
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: should be first, like family should be first, and it
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: was like a very radical idea. So it's not long
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: ago that we kind of had this martyrdom as the norm,
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: you know, as the sort of thing where we're like, oh,
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: of course you lose their identity. Of course, your kids
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: become who you are. Of course, your family is how
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: you define your worth, of course, all these things. So
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: it is really beautiful that we've made it this farthest
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: quickly where people are realizing now that like you're worth
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: is in how much you love yourself and feeding into yourself.
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: And it's so interesting to have it um reflected in
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: like a family system because like, our parents are of
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: the generation that you know, did kind of like sacrifice
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: their needs and desires and their life plans. This is
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: generally speaking, and from like my mom's mom and dad's perspective,
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: Like so they did like kids come first, they come
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: way not even second, like way down the line. And
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: for them to witness me like actually put myself first,
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: great boundaries, make decisions for myself, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. It's
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: like it is radical. It is kind of shaking up
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: their idea of like like their idea of themselves. And
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: I think too, it's like when when you are learning
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: how to do self work, or you are getting your
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: building up that internal courage and kind of tenacity to
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: go for self, you also have to investigate what are
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: these definitions of these systems we believe in, right, Like
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: even the concept of put kids first, Oh no, put
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: yourself first. Well, let's sit in what those definitions of
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: first are, because I think the quick assumption is that
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: if I were to say I don't put my child first,
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: that means that they are the afterthought of my life,
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: that I'm somehow neglecting them or their needs, or I
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: somehow have a disdain for doing the things for them
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: that are required. Right, And the lens that I look
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: through it from is like my son young quest he
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: is the most profound joy of my life, the most
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: important important human beings, soul, experience of my life period
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: with to doubt, there is nothing, nothing that comes ahead
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: of my son. However, I still take time for myself.
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: And so it's not me saying me under the under
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: the understanding of putting myself first. It doesn't mean that
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: he ever misses a meal, that he ever misses a hug,
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: that he ever misses anything that I so gladly and
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: happily and gratefully give to him. But it does mean
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: that Mommy is not going to take on guilt when
• 47:29
  Speaker 1: I do something for me. It does mean that, you
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: know what, I will take a vacation by myself for
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: myself when I need to. And I know and I
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: trust that I have equipped him with the people and
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: the life that are most supportive for him, that will
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: love and nurture him, and he will be clear on
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: how I feel. It doesn't have to be a one
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: or the other. It can be this exchange, it can
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: be both. And it's like when we when women are
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: coming into this space, so much of why they can't
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: put themselves first, or why they think they are being
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: so righteous that they serve everyone else and oh no,
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: I never I don't have time to look at me
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: or do It's a cop out, it's a tool of avoidance.
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: We just have to more deeply understand the languaging around
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: some of these belief systems that we're hashing out as
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: our life values. And you're doing something for yourself as
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: an act of love for your son, you know, it's
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: like under that umbrella of like he's first and therefore
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: I want to take care of for him. I don't
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: want him to ever, you know, seeing a mom that's
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: stressed out, seeing a mom that is on her last legs,
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: it's not going to endear to him the full understanding
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: of the power he can carry and wield in this world. Right,
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: It'll just be oh, my mom did everything for me.
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: Oh well, poor mom, I stress her out, yeah, or
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: I stress her out, or it's going to be like, oh,
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: she never got to do things. And so then you're
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: passing down this guilt because he didn't choose yourself all,
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: because you didn't process yourself, you know. And it's it's hard,
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: it's challenging, and there's no judgment and that go at
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: your own pace, but it's just it really, that piece
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: of it investigating what are the deeper layers and the
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: stories even of the belief systems that I really love.
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: Mm hmmm, I think yeah. And two with being um
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: a mom, it's almost like the serving others and people
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: that serve others. It's an avoidance really of the self
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: because it's like if you eventually sit by yourself, you
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: realize that your self worth, your self love is based
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: on others. You know, you're putting other people first because
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: of that reason, and there's so much deeper there. That
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: is actually really hard to because when you start to
• 49:42
  Speaker 1: when you start to create boundaries, people are like, what
• 49:45
  Speaker 1: are you doing? You are the mom that I walk
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: all over, You're the mom that's always there for me.
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: You're the mom that puts certainly first, like you're the mom.
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: So that is actually challenging, but it's like, again, the
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: most worthwhile thing that you could ever do, you know,
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: because just because you become a parent doesn't mean you
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: still don't have your individual destiny. It doesn't mean you
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: don't still have your you know, the vastness of whoever
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: you're called to be in this world. It's just you're
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: meant to be that and also shine your light on
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: this child and be a gift to them, and eventually
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: the child will be a gift to the world. Hold
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: that thought. We are coming right back. I really want
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: to get into some more of friendship intimacy with you guys. Um,
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: you guys have such a beautiful friendship and the thing
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: that I take away when I experience you both is
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: really the masterful support system you've created for yourselves so
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: that you can be great friends for one another. And
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: I hear so much thoughtfulness and deliberate action in that.
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: Something you shared a little bit earlier was that as
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: a team, you know, going from friendship into a business,
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: especially a business like yours that becomes this successful and known,
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: there are the pressures to it and a lot of
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: friendships in that way. But you guys really supported yourself.
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: What structures did you put in place or what systems
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: did you put in place so that you can not
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: only live this big friendship life but also have vibrant
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: careers together. Yeah, it's definitely been an evolution and a
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: learning process because in the early years we were really
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: consumed with with building this and I think like through
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: a lot of our energy and time into the business
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: and not necessarily our friendship, and just as a background,
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: we we met and started the podcast very shortly after.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: So we've kind of been like, you know, um, deepening
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: our friendship as we've grown the business. So it's been
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: it's been really cool. Um, but I think, you know,
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: we hit kind of a point where we realized how
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: integral our friendship is to the success of the business.
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: And that's not why we wanted to focus on the friendship,
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: because that is number one, but it was becoming so obvious. Um,
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: And so like what Chris has said earlier about just
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: kind of that like underlying tension, and so much of
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: it was, um yeah, there was a lot of pressure.
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: And also just building a business is like some of
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: the most confronting self study you will ever do. As
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: public figures too, Yes, as public figures people watching you
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: and and doing something that are not a lot of
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: women have done. You know, I think the podcasting space
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: was kind of like a lot of men in the beginning,
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: and so as you know, it's like there's not a
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: ton and so anyway, I feel like, um, yeah, we
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: got to the point where we had to and and
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: and we really like looked at where we were projecting
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: and where um, our own stories in our head, Like
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: mine was like, am I ever going to be good
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: enough for this business? Because I don't really have a
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: background in corporate and I, you know, just felt like
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: I didn't have the tools, when really I have everything
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: I need in order to give to what we're creating.
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: It wouldn't have tapped us on the shoulder if I didn't.
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: But I was so wrapped up in like she knows
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: how to do this, this, this, this, and like am
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: I even worthy to be here for this thing? You know?
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: And um, So much of those stories were going on
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: in our heads and not in real life, and so
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: once we started to have those conversations, it's like the
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: pressure was released. It was like, oh, and what did that? What?
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: How did you begin that? Right? Like how did you
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: even kind of open yourself enough in that vulnerability to
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: start telling each other there, uh, this may not be
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: working well or I feel like this you're making me
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: feel like this. I remember one time I was like
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: in the car and I called after work. It was
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: like a while ago, and I was like, I called
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: and I just was like wanted to speak to something
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: and say something about you know, how I was feeling. Um,
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: But it also has been what is deeply deepened us
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: is going through. You know, last year we had UM
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: just hard times, as many people did, and it really
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: those hard moments really shook us up enough to like
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: have to show up vulnerably because we were like so
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: scared and we were just so um unsure. So in
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: the hard times, it's forced us to have to be
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: vulnerable and it's forced us to have to be truthful UM.
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: But it's not like every time we say something something's
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: bothering us. It's not like we're communicating like every second
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: like hey, that was kind of annoying. You're like, hey,
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: that was it's really at the times when we're like okay,
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: I know that we're both psychically feeling that there's an
• 55:00
  Speaker 1: off situation happening. How are we going to approach this UM?
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: But for the tools that we've used, I mean, we
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: did we did an ayahuasca to retreat together in Costa Rica,
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: which was helpful and opening. We did this UM retreated
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: on site. It's like a it's in Nashville and they
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: do group therapy work. So it's like this intense group
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: therapy work that we both did together that was profound.
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: And then this year, we really honed and on our support.
• 55:27
  Speaker 1: And we have a coach that we work with um
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: every month, and then we have a healer named Kiki
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: that we work with every two weeks. And so just
• 55:33
  Speaker 1: making sure that I have my therapist, you have your therapist,
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: we have our coach, we have our healer. How can
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: we make sure that we have people that we pay
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: to support us, but that we deeply trust. And it
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: really holds like a container for conversations that we have
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: on our own and also broadens our or deepens our
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: awareness of the other. You know. It's like I think
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: we can get so wrapped up in our own stuff,
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: and so if I'm aware of, you know, something that
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: may have happened to Christa before I even met her,
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: that might be you know, triggered now in a moment
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: between us, it just gives me so much more color
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: and more compassion where I'm like okay, like you know
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: where my reaction, I'm less likely to react and more
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: likely to inquire or offer support or just hold space
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: or give space. It's so impressive. But that's how, you know,
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: I thought about, like how do I want to spend
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: my money? Like I want to invest it in myself
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: like once you also to have been It's interesting how
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: you transition, Like you know, before I was like labels, clothes, things,
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: which is amazing, and then you kind of move out
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: of that and you're like, how will this serve me
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: to like help me multiply my energy and my time
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: and my mental health. Like that's how like I'm spending
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: all my money every month is on stuff like that
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: because it just like feeds me in every way possible. Yeah,
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: it's funny. I had a meeting with my business manager
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: and I'm I'm a highly detailed person, very very detailed,
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: but with the flow. But I like structures and you know,
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: I like all the things, and so you know, I
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: was he was telling me. He was like, who who
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: do you think you are? Lebron? He was like the
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: body maintenance that you do? Like I do acupuncture all
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: the time, I have regular chiropractic care, I get regular massages.
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: I spend a lot of money on taking baths. I
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: take like five baths a week and I use two
• 57:30
  Speaker 1: bags of epsom salt and a bath bomb and a
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: little of this and a little of that in the bath,
• 57:36
  Speaker 1: like a gold flakes, and I have you know, lots
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: of lots of plant medicine to support me during the week,
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: and so and I and I do lots of experiences,
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: so I get a lot of energy work done on myself.
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: I get a lot of you know, I'm I'm so
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: blessed to know healers. And so my monthly budget on
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: things on on that kind of spending, Um, it ain't cheap,
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: you know. But I was telling him, he was like,
• 58:03
  Speaker 1: who do who do you think you are? Lebron. You're
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: just like, but you're not going out there to play something.
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: And I was like, no, this is so that I
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: can exist and I can show up impactfully in the world,
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: and this is what my soul needs for my healing
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: and all the things. And I said, but I'm not
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: necessarily the one that's going to run out and get
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: the newest bag, right Like, I'm not necessarily the one
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: that's going to spend a bunch of money on on labels.
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: And and that's fine. If you do whatever however you
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: want to use your money, um, use it. But I
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: do have my I do have my vices. I do
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: have my special things that I'll splurge on, but it's
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: always connected to my soul. I will splurge on a retreat.
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: I will split if I hear about some insane experience
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: that's going to expand my heart or mind. Add two cards,
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: you know, Whereas the ambercan says, um, She's like, people
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: call me high maintenance, but it's okay because I maintained myself. Yeah,
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: just so just like the highness, you know, like you
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: can maintain yourself and whatever your priorities are, you know whatever.
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: And we also we've had you know, financial experts on too,
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: and it was really liberating. He's like, make sure you're
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: covering all savings, spending, housing, but then if you have
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: one thing that you like have no limit on, then
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: that should be your thing. Like my no limit is
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: like health and wellness, spirituality, it's like my no limit.
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: It's like I know this is going to pay me
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: in dividends in my life and my energy expenditure and
• 59:27
  Speaker 1: my growth in everything. So it's like this is like
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: no limit. I love what you said that. And food babe, Yeah,
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: that's my no limit and that's my non negotiable too,
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: And I feel you know, I I thankfully I'm outside
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: of the loop of womanhood, womanhood, martyrdom, right, and I
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: think that that's what kept me ever feeling guilt about
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: doing things for myself. But this idea that if you
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: are able, if you're able, and you're not as a
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: woman who is moving through the world, who is also
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: processing your own life experiences and your spiritual curriculum, oftentimes
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 1: raising children or supporting your household, if you have it
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: to spare, you should be doing a fifty dollar massage
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: a week. Why not if you have the time, if
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: you have the opportunity, the money, Why would did you?
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 1: And I hear there are so many women I meet
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 1: and it's it's so mind blowing to me that will
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: be like I've never had a massage before, or I
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: only go, you know once once a year. I go,
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 1: and I get like a relaxation on Mother's Day. Girl,
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: If you don't sign up for a deep tissue, lay
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: yourself down, receive and receive and that's it. That's it,
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 1: And that's funny. That's what we the three of us
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 1: are talking about. When I walked into the living room
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: just about you know, all of what it takes as
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 1: a woman to get in a space where you feel
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 1: comfortable enough to just receive and to not have to
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 1: do and to not have to give even this is
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: this is the perfect example. You know, if someone comes
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: over and they're like, oh, I'll get that for you.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: No no, no, no, don't worry about it. No no,
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: no no, I got it. Or oh I'm gonna run
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: and take off the traps, I'll take it off your
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: no no no, no no, I got it. I got it.
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: To what, I'll just do it. Women do that for
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: everything all the time, at work, at home, on the street,
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: and so like kind of a game I've been playing
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: with myself in this last year is just every time
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: I want to say no, I investigate why the hell
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: I want to say it first, and then I do
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: the opposite, And I said, why why am I constantly
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: refusing help? But then sometimes feeling like no one wants
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 1: to help me with anything, or feeling like I'm so tired,
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 1: And so I started looking at all the times that
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: I turn it down without even thinking, for no reason,
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 1: for no benefit. And then you're also robbing the person
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: of showing up and being of service, you know. So
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: it's like that energy exchange. We have to start to
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 1: love of ourselves enough, start to disarm ourselves enough so
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: that we can receive what our needs are we can
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: really receive. Oh yeah, yeah, I've experienced that in female
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: friendships where I not allowing that exchange to happen. For example,
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: like not um Kristen, I had this where I wasn't
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: like sharing some intimate parts of like what was going
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 1: on with me, And it wasn't like hiding from anyone
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: who was just kind of keeping it close because I
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: was like, okay, when I want to just process this myself,
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: but then also not thinking about how that is felt
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: and how beautiful and beneficial it is to not only
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: have a friend that I can trust and who supports me,
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: but to be able to have that energy exchange around
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 1: that thing and that's going on, that issue, that challenge, etcetera.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: And I just felt like, oh, I don't want to
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 1: put that on people. Oh I don't want to, you know,
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 1: add to the list, and I want to handle it myself.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: And I'm really robbing my friendships of that opportunity to yeah.
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: Just and that's a trauma response that it's protecting. Yeah,
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 1: it's like yeah, or it's like what, yeah, maybe being
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: let down when you told someone something good or and
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 1: I think in the receiving, it's like the ying Yang
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: of life. Baby. People are People are doing a lot,
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: People are putting out a lot of content, creating a
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: lot of things, doing a lot of work, doing a
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 1: lot of self work, doing a lot of all of
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: these things, and no one is taking time to receive.
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 1: And I can really relate to that of how much
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: energy expenditure I was doing for years and years with
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: almost thirty. It's like, babe, where are you going? Well,
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: what's the goal here? Because you're doing all of the things,
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: you're manifesting your da da da da dada, but you're
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: making no space from an energetic level to have that
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 1: come back to you. And I really felt that imbalance
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: where I was like, yo, it's like cloud. It's like
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 1: a cloud. I was like, you know, all of this
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 1: is out here, but there's no room. I'm not allowing
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 1: room because I'm onto the next. And that's really like
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 1: a product of our culture, a product of like the consumerism,
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: the patriarchy, you know, that kind of thing where we're
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 1: just do do do, and we never receive. It's the feminine, Yeah,
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: it's the feminine really lost, even because the femininists we're
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: the matt like when we received, there's nothing better but
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: we literally have been trained to not Yeah, you know,
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 1: and and that's the thing that I think makes it
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 1: probably harder for women to get outside of that trap
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: in that box. It's we were brainwashed to deny ourselves
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: since the very first woman inhabited the earth, you know.
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: And so then when we even begin to eate the
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: apple baby supposedly that's so true, but you know, like
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: you and then but then when we you know, when
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: we try to unravel ourselves from that, and then we're
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: we're confronted with all of this guilt about it? Am
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: I allowed? Should I? Also? Why is this so hard?
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: Why don't I know how to? What's wrong with me?
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's all true, you know, It's just it's just
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 1: this this brain fuck. I know, it's I've been thinking
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: about a lot lately of like in the way in
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: this because I said, try to gamify things, like it's
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: fun when you are doing you know, try to gamify things.
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 1: It's like, oh my god, that's so funny that once
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: again I was doing this or I'm showing up in
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 1: this way, I'm expecting this or something and make it
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 1: a fun game or fun conversation. But one of the
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: ways I'm sort of gamifying my work around that is
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 1: thinking about my brain and how deeply entrenched the electrical
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 1: circuits are between um limiting thoughts or limiting beliefs. It's like, wow,
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: those have been there for thirty years. Baby, they work
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 1: really well. They are like they are really well. So
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: I always try and think about in my brain my
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: new circuits. I was like, Oh, my newly developed circuits
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: that are of constant positivity and believing in myself and
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: receiving in all of these things. I was like, I
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: just need to feed those circuits more like I got
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: to feed my new circuits my new neural pathways in
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 1: my mind, because you really are, in a sense, rewiring
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 1: your brain, and because of neural plasticity, it's really possible.
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 1: So when we're doing more work, we're doing positive self talk,
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: it's actually changing the fibers of your brain and it
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: gets easier over time. Wow yep, yes, And you know
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 1: that's the thing is like, and I think we can
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 1: all attest to that. It's like, it's not it's it's hard,
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 1: it's in my experience. My experience was challenging at first,
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: but I made it so that it was so bad
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: that I had to do something, and now it just
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: gets easier and funner and more playful, because it's like
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: it builds on itself. It's okay to not be good
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 1: at something right away, and it's okay to not know
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: who we are right away when we begin this work.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: And I think that's the piece that feels like such
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 1: an attack on each person individually, like when you're like, okay, well,
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: I said I'm going to do the work. I'm gonna
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: start and I'm trying, but it hurts so much. Why
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: does it feel so hard? You know? And it's really
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 1: just reframing it. It's new, and it's nothing is wrong
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 1: with us, but the programming we had it's working really well.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 1: And so how do I now say, hey, programming, thank
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: you for doing the job you were set to do.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 1: But now we're changing core. We have a software update. Yeah, baby,
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: now we got a software update that we're uploading into
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 1: the system. We're going to show up differently. And I
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: also think, too, what's the alternative? You know? For me,
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 1: the alternative was to literally be so anxious I could
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: not It was debilitating, how anxious I was, how depressed
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: I was, and that what's my alternative be deeply uncomfortable
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 1: but deeply committed, or is it to be in this
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 1: state of like this low level anxiety or to prey
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: and that I felt like was normalized in my experience.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: I felt like everyone around me had normalized it. And
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 1: there is something to those that that means a lot physically,
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: that means a lot emotionally, and I've struggled with them deeply.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: So it's not something to to scoff that. It's not
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 1: something that's easy to get over. But the alternative to
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 1: the work is like a life that feels just unlived.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 1: And if we think about any any opportunity to change,
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 1: like the beginning part of the process is always so
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 1: uncomfortable and confronting, Like even if we think back to
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 1: like just being a little kid and like learning to
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 1: ride a bike, and it's like that that beginning is
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 1: so frustrating and we want to give up, and it's
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 1: just constantly happening in our lives and so like to
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 1: Christ's point, if we can kind of gamify it and
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 1: be like, oh another thing, okay, cool, Like I have
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 1: a new opportunity to become new again and to just
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 1: kind of yeah, see life in a difference in a
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: different light, it becomes truly that gift. In the moment,
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: you know, it's like wow, so so privileged to be
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: able to be so aware that this is happening, fully
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 1: commit to like the new, the new period. What you
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: just said is so perfect and it speaks to my soul.
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: And that's really that's how I approach life. And I
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 1: love that. I love that lens because our superpowers are curiosity.
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: If we could just remove the judgment of self and
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 1: move into a space of enthusiastic curiosity about these things,
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 1: it changes the whole way that we receive ourselves, the
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 1: whole way we process. We were talking before the show.
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 1: We were catching up on many things, some of the
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: things I can't here um, but one of the things
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: that you know that I had shared with you guys,
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 1: is that what I realized over Easter was how much
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: shadow work was coming up for me and how like
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: I had gotten really triggered by something and it kind
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 1: of like I felt that familiar anxiety swelling in my chest.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: I felt this need to control, I felt this desire
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 1: to have an immediate reaction or to have it tied
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: up in a bow, and then instead of acting on
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: any of it, I took a breath and I just
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 1: said when I felt gratitude because I said, gosh, you've
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 1: come so far, and look how much work you've done,
• 1:10:31
  Speaker 1: which has allowed this piece that you never noticed before
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 1: to come up, this deeper piece that you hadn't paid
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 1: attention to yet it has now been able to rise
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 1: to the surface because of all the obstacles that are gone.
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: And then and this will happen within a span of
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 1: a couple of minutes, like that's how the process works
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 1: in real time. But I remember then it it came
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: in as this, like just this beautiful gust of wind
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 1: of joy, and I said, oh, okay, I have something
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: I can think my teeth into. This is for my
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 1: highest good. There is there is some healing to be
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 1: done here. There is a wound, but I found it
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 1: so I can heal it. It doesn't have to just
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 1: be there. And so then I started approaching it different
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: and I ended up spending um that evening just in
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 1: prayer with myself and in meditation, and I explored and
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 1: I actually got to the root of what that anxiety
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: was about earlier. And I felt like I got to
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: a place where I made peace with it. And this
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 1: happened in a couple of hours. The alternative alternative would
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 1: have been I could have behaved in a way that
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 1: changed the structures of some of my relationships in a
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 1: way that I then burdened myself with guilt or judgment about,
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 1: and maybe I could have been holding onto that feeling
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: for the next year or two, you know. And so
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: I just kind of like, I love that, break that
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: down and show that kind of road, because I really
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 1: want people to understand when we talk about the work
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 1: healing can happen in the twinkle of an eye. It's
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 1: all about our participation. What are we willing to do,
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 1: what are we willing to let go of? You know? Yeah,
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 1: and starting with you rather than kind of like forcing
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 1: yourself into the conversation with those that might have triggered
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 1: what came up. So I think sometimes we think, well,
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 1: it's because of them. Yeah, well they did that and
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 1: that's why I felt that way. But the deeper question
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 1: is how does it have that effect on me? What
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: is what is the older feeling? What is the first
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: feeling behind that one? Right? Like, how why would that
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: upset me? Especially if I know truth to be something different?
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 1: How does that hold me? There? Why has this become
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: a cell for me? Can I open the door? You know? Yeah?
• 1:12:48
  Speaker 1: Ram Das always says, if you think you are enlightened,
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 1: spend a week with your family. That's one of my
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: favorite quotes of all time because it's the biggest fact. Remember,
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 1: I would be on my path. I would be like,
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 1: you know, I'm almost perfect now, I'm so spiritual. I'm
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 1: meditating every day. And then I would go home and
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 1: be like, Yo, what the fund again? And I'm like,
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 1: I don't care, It's just it's crazy. You want to
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 1: check on where you're at spiritually, go hang out with
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 1: your family? That is huge, huge, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: always so blown away by both of your work on
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 1: your show, on the podcast Almost thirty, which everyone please
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 1: you have to listen to the show. Um, and they
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 1: have like a million episodes, so there's so much to
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 1: get kept to catch up on. They've been doing this
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 1: for a while, um, and you know, just been at
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 1: the highest level possible. But just our individual conversations, it's
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 1: just you guys are both exceptional women and just so brilliant.
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 1: So it is an honor to have you on my show.
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much, and everybody listening you have to
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 1: listen to episode I did on that show, so it's
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: so unreal. A woman in her power, for real, for real,
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: trum Well, hopefully we dropped gems dropped DeBie Devah. We
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 1: really appreciate. Catch you guys next time. Peace. Hey find
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 1: me on social Let's connect at Debbie Brown. That's Twitter
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 1: and Instagram, or go to my website Debbie Brown dot com.
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 1: And if you're listening to the show on Apple Podcasts,
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 1: please please please don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 1: and send this episode to a friend. Dropping Jims is
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 1: the production of I Heart Radio and Black Effect Network.
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 1: It's produced by Triple and Me Debbie Brown. For more
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 1: podcasts from My heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app,
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.