Latest / Dear Son, / My Father Gave Me Discipline. That's What I Needed to Be Excellent | Ep 207 | The Dear Son, Show

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My Father Gave Me Discipline. That's What I Needed to Be Excellent | Ep 207 | The Dear Son, Show · Dear Son,

0:00
[SPEAKER_03]: What is the toll on you as a visionary in excellence?
0:05
[SPEAKER_03]: So, it used to weigh on me more early on.
0:10
[SPEAKER_03]: The first time I got back last from my community, I was floored.
0:16
[SPEAKER_03]: I was like, what?
0:18
[SPEAKER_03]: Wait, what?
0:19
[SPEAKER_03]: Hey, bro, you see this on Twitter at that time, you'll still do it.
0:21
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I'm not even on there.
0:23
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, you see this on Twitter, though?
0:24
[SPEAKER_03]: What?
0:25
[SPEAKER_03]: What are you going in?
0:27
[SPEAKER_03]: On what?
0:29
[SPEAKER_03]: y'all cause y'all men and suits what?
0:33
[SPEAKER_03]: and it was a it was a lot of, oh, I mean, projected oh, I'm sure they not this oh, I'm this and this and I'm sure they not this I can almost guarantee you they love white women or like, I mean, it, it was so much and I was just like how does our joy cause you frustration
1:00
[SPEAKER_00]: Cool, cool.
1:00
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, sir.
1:01
[SPEAKER_00]: All right, guys.
1:02
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's get it.
1:02
[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the DS on show.
1:04
[SPEAKER_00]: We have meaningful conversations about life through the lens of fatherhood.
1:08
[SPEAKER_00]: It is four fathers, those with fathers and the father lesson nobody's left out.
1:14
[SPEAKER_00]: These are the conversations on one of my sons that access as they grow through life in the manhood.
1:18
[SPEAKER_00]: So no topics are off limits today.
1:21
[SPEAKER_00]: As you guessed, and I'm your only host, D. John's, but we got the amazing Leandroe Bruce Sard in the building.
1:26
[SPEAKER_00]: How you feel about my brother?
1:27
[SPEAKER_00]: I feel really good, man.
1:28
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for having me, my brother.
1:30
[SPEAKER_00]: Appreciate you being here, sir.
1:31
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, sir.
1:32
[SPEAKER_00]: You're not so far.
1:33
[SPEAKER_03]: No, man.
1:34
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, Southside of the South suburb, the southern sector.
1:37
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, yeah, yes, man.
1:39
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm glad to be in the southern sector.
1:41
[SPEAKER_00]: South guy's on the side.
1:42
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, sir.
1:42
[SPEAKER_00]: I was talking about automatically some everybody's in Frisco.
1:45
[SPEAKER_03]: Unfortunately.
1:46
[SPEAKER_00]: Anything at the Frisco to me is Oklahoma?
1:48
[SPEAKER_03]: So I don't even anything outside of down, pad downtown for me is too far.
1:53
[SPEAKER_03]: You see how I'm dressed.
1:54
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
1:55
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, my travel guild, my house shoes for those that don't know.
1:58
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, how do you present yourself?
2:00
[SPEAKER_00]: I know people are presenting you in a way.
2:02
[SPEAKER_00]: You got a lot of things going, but if somebody were to ask you to present yourself, how do you present yourself?
2:07
[SPEAKER_03]: Tata Guy first, first and foremost, but then husband, father, visionary, I like to say I am a visionary entrepreneur, but I try history background in finding to services before launching out before time entrepreneurship, but I'm just a person that guy speaks through two people
2:35
[SPEAKER_03]: discipline enough to listen.
2:37
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, but I mean, and not sure, man, just I'm just a guy from from Houston being in Dallas 20 years now.
2:44
[SPEAKER_03]: So Dallas is home.
2:46
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
2:46
[SPEAKER_03]: Now, but just trying to try and to, and my most humble way, walk the path that's been laid out for me.
2:53
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I think you're doing the fantastic job.
2:56
[SPEAKER_00]: My thank you outside looking here.
2:57
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, sir.
2:58
[SPEAKER_00]: You should know more about it in this conversation.
3:02
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, Houston has the wars, right?
3:04
[SPEAKER_00]: Not the worst, but Houston has Houston has the worst.
3:06
[SPEAKER_00]: You Houston prop was just outside.
3:09
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't know if West Houston Now I'm more so cypress area, so no-for-est Far North West Houston.
3:16
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I'm on that was a Marine, so Technically I'm from all over here.
3:20
[SPEAKER_03]: I'll born in Houston
3:22
[SPEAKER_03]: My dad retired when I was 10, so that that time we returned to Houston, and I was in Houston until that was 18, 17 came up here, Dallas to go to SMU, graduate from SMU and to stuck around Dallas.
3:36
[SPEAKER_03]: I say now 20 years, 20 years later.
3:38
[SPEAKER_03]: Your father was Marine, he is a Marine.
3:41
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, you know, they, you know, they, please forgive me.
3:45
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, they like that.
3:46
[SPEAKER_00]: It's up to five, right?
3:47
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, sure.
3:49
[SPEAKER_00]: 10 years old 10 years old is a you know what's going on in life for 10 years old to the three.
3:55
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember the difference of who he was as a father before and after?
4:00
[SPEAKER_03]: I do and honestly maybe not maybe not hard line.
4:05
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, but you see the change.
4:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Sure.
4:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, for sure.
4:07
[SPEAKER_03]: My dad was my dad was hard to rock before when he was when he was still active duty.
4:13
[SPEAKER_03]: I remember vividly the one time that I saw my dad cry because it shocked me so much and Fast forward.
4:21
[SPEAKER_03]: I realized I'm a parent for going through a time and so he was he was going through a time as they were as they were they were Going through time as as a married man now I understand you don't say respect to everything is not But you all try to make sure that your kids don't see correct what's going on.
4:35
[SPEAKER_03]: It's all remember time when my dad was crying
4:39
[SPEAKER_03]: No, the one time I saw him cry, before I was tear, and then after I was tear, you know, he because, and then also to the, you know, my dad, my dad really found Christ.
4:53
[SPEAKER_03]: towards his retirement.
4:54
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
4:55
[SPEAKER_03]: And so after that point, he'd become a vulnerable in the spirits of not seeing my dad cry of the time.
5:00
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, tears of joy, tears of sorrow, tears of pain.
5:04
[SPEAKER_03]: So that was one of those things that I definitely saw a difference that he became more human after the military.
5:11
[SPEAKER_03]: He started 21 years.
5:13
[SPEAKER_03]: So I mean, my dad tell you, ain't punk, walk through that brick wall right there.
5:16
[SPEAKER_03]: The walls don't want to need to be intimidated by being not the other way around.
5:23
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I kind of saw the softer side of him being one to education.
5:26
[SPEAKER_03]: He went into the ministry.
5:27
[SPEAKER_03]: So with that, it was, you know, a very education with, he was middle school for a number of years.
5:34
[SPEAKER_03]: He taught middle school.
5:34
[SPEAKER_03]: And at that point, you have to, yes, you need to instill discipline on these young men and young women at that time.
5:40
[SPEAKER_03]: He's football coach.
5:41
[SPEAKER_03]: But there was a balance to it that in the military to have that balance.
5:45
[SPEAKER_03]: It was,
5:46
[SPEAKER_03]: Order yeah my order and my dad was very high ranking guys obviously 21 years, right?
5:51
[SPEAKER_03]: But I just saw that kind of like the softest side come out of him now he's a grandfather Who is you know right right much more patient much more like yeah, let them do what?
6:01
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, let them like who let them do okay?
6:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, you know at that as you get as you get older you start to realize a lot of things that you were stuck on earlier Don't you know Doesn't it's not the end all be all yeah, but yeah, I definitely saw that
6:16
[SPEAKER_03]: uh... growth and progression in him uh... once he got out because when he retired he was thirty nine okay so going to that next phase of life retiring and then turning forty uh... and these he kind of said the softer side of it so we're trying to admit to see if i can actually be a father but i can't i don't think so yeah all go yeah right like that i think that's interesting we just had a conversation about uh...
6:44
[SPEAKER_00]: The importance of examples, becoming men, seeing your father transition, which I think is beautiful, number one out of his professional career into something else, seeing him become, as you stated more, human, which is what I was thinking, as you described them, how did that lay the foundation
7:04
[SPEAKER_00]: What did that foundation mean to you?
7:06
[SPEAKER_00]: How did it show up as you were starting to consider life with the family getting married, having children?
7:13
[SPEAKER_00]: How important was that?
7:14
[SPEAKER_03]: No, man, I think for me.
7:18
[SPEAKER_03]: One of the realist aspects of what I got from my dad was presence of production.
7:26
[SPEAKER_03]: Now, I see learn that phrase later in life during my adulthood and work, you know, being in the entry that I was in.
7:34
[SPEAKER_03]: But that's something that he and I talked about later in life that I realized.
7:38
[SPEAKER_03]: My dad would be on ship.
7:40
[SPEAKER_03]: He would be, you know, you have to go away for PT.
7:43
[SPEAKER_03]: A number of times when my dad wasn't physically there, but his presence never let the household.
7:49
[SPEAKER_03]: And it was one of those things where it was like,
7:52
[SPEAKER_03]: My mom said I'll get a 12-year school for talk of two bucks.
7:57
[SPEAKER_03]: He wants it out.
7:57
[SPEAKER_03]: He said and my mom would be like I'ma get to you, but I'ma tell you that he's thousands of miles away.
8:05
[SPEAKER_03]: It doesn't matter.
8:05
[SPEAKER_03]: He on in the middle of the ocean somewhere and I'm like
8:10
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, it's just that, and, um, as I travel a lot now, I travel more back in my, you know, when I was when I was still in corporate, and one of those things where it was a, your kids, your children, even if you aren't physically there at times, need to understand that there's a hierarchy that daddy's at the top of.
8:31
[SPEAKER_03]: And with that, their kind of responsibility is that they have and responsibilities is that I have and so I saw that my dad is still that in me like everybody plays their part and now as my boy is getting older It's really instilling in them a lot of the disciplinary aspects that that I got from him through that presence that he had and I think the discipline is
8:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Pivotal for young men, and especially young black men, it's unfortunate that we have to be more disciplined in others Because like doesn't give us all of those the path opportunities, right?
9:08
[SPEAKER_03]: But knowing that it's on us to instill that so that what we we allow our children to have the safest most wonderful lives that they can But a lot of discipline is very much required and
9:22
[SPEAKER_03]: I think back of how structured our household was, those are things that I, you know, try to implement nowadays.
9:29
[SPEAKER_03]: It's not a had to be as, you know, best of luck to you.
9:33
[SPEAKER_03]: But, but the structure that comes with that, at least the base of the foundation of that, or is definitely things.
9:38
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, the asserted notes are like, hey, man.
9:41
[SPEAKER_03]: Look the person in the eye when you're speaking with them, shake their hand, walk into a room, make sure that your presence is felt Don't shrink, you know, grow, expand into a room because you never know how your presence can help to get you to where you want to be like those little things, opening doors, chivalry, a lot of that gentleman stuff that I learned from my dad, I'm not passing on to my sons and then my mom doubled down on her, right?
10:04
[SPEAKER_03]: I would be anywhere I am without my mom as well as as a part of that process, but just really like the the presence that he had the structure that he provided that now kind of passes through me into my children.
10:18
[SPEAKER_03]: I want to make sure that they understand that.
10:21
[SPEAKER_03]: and that they, you know, like say thrive within, within those, uh, confines that they should have.
10:27
[SPEAKER_03]: I don't think they anybody should be, uh, care how well successful or spoiled any child is.
10:33
[SPEAKER_03]: They still need to have structure and no limitations and no boundaries.
10:37
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, I think that that's, that was, that was something not even on my head.
10:41
[SPEAKER_03]: More boundaries than most, I think I think that it, it worked itself out.
10:44
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I'm, I'm certain I did.
10:46
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you said a couple of interesting things, his presence,
10:51
[SPEAKER_00]: want to get into that, but your story is starting to sound very relatable for me because of the corporate house and corporate race, right?
11:00
[SPEAKER_00]: The very well progressed, climbed the ladder is often saying it was leading against the wrong building.
11:07
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I started to take inventory of who I had been in the house and what expense was the house for my success.
11:15
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
11:16
[SPEAKER_00]: As you had the framework of your father being away, but President still there,
11:21
[SPEAKER_00]: How easy or difficult was it for you to negotiate or harassing the last, the work demand and the home demand and with the trade-offs, makes it honestly for me, I love being home.
11:39
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I love my wife.
11:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I love my kids.
11:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I love waking up next to my wife in the morning.
11:44
[SPEAKER_03]: I love my kids hearing them say good morning, dad.
11:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Good night, dad.
11:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Giving me hugs and kisses saying I love you.
11:50
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I, I, I've value that I was on the road.
11:55
[SPEAKER_03]: I think I was in California, man, and I'm, as this is one of my work trips.
12:01
[SPEAKER_03]: I got it to the hotel room and the difference between a house and a hotel room that I learned is a hotel room just to door behind you, the house you have to close the door, right?
12:10
[SPEAKER_03]: So when you walk into a hotel room, it automatically closes behind you, because it's not trying to let everybody in.
12:15
[SPEAKER_03]: Your house?
12:16
[SPEAKER_03]: I can't tell you how many times my front door is blown up because we go out the door.
12:20
[SPEAKER_03]: We don't lock it and then it's just one of them gusts cause it hits the door and it just blows open.
12:25
[SPEAKER_03]: And that it was one of those trips may end the sound of the door behind me, the kachunk.
12:35
[SPEAKER_03]: Right behind me, I was like, I hate that sound.
12:39
[SPEAKER_03]: That was one of those turning points for me when I was like,
12:46
[SPEAKER_03]: being out of a suitcase.
12:48
[SPEAKER_03]: It was a sound of not being where I want to be.
12:52
[SPEAKER_03]: I enjoyed I enjoyed good relationships.
12:55
[SPEAKER_03]: I enjoyed the work trip and even now like I still travel enough, right?
13:01
[SPEAKER_03]: But it came a time where I was like my boys are getting older.
13:05
[SPEAKER_03]: how do I truly balance this full time entrepreneurship full time sales role so that's full time a lot of hours and so like it became a point where it was a you know God what are you trying to to give me and it became a point where it was contentious in the household around time
13:33
[SPEAKER_03]: All right.
13:34
[SPEAKER_03]: All right.
13:34
[SPEAKER_03]: Got to hear you clearly.
13:35
[SPEAKER_03]: Let's go down this path.
13:36
[SPEAKER_03]: Let's go down like I've given this to you.
13:38
[SPEAKER_03]: Let's go down that.
13:39
[SPEAKER_03]: Go down that path.
13:39
[SPEAKER_03]: Follow and see what all I have for you.
13:42
[SPEAKER_03]: And it became a point where it was like I was missing out on opportunities because I would have to be at work on a work trip.
13:49
[SPEAKER_03]: Now, I can't come speak over here because I got to go over here because they're paying my salary.
13:52
[SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying?
13:52
[SPEAKER_03]: Like there's there's that responsibility there, there's the benefits.
13:57
[SPEAKER_03]: No, that was often they were entitled to that time.
14:00
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, um, got to a point where I was just praying on it, thinking about it, having a conversation with my wife with Erica and it was, so that was time, you know, it's time.
14:11
[SPEAKER_03]: And but for me, it was, I was, I was missing being home.
14:17
[SPEAKER_03]: Which yeah, I find interesting that a lot of guys don't say that same thing.
14:22
[SPEAKER_03]: Like they actually missed their family, but for me, man, like, I look at them.
14:28
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm just grateful, you know, everything that I've been able to do thus far is because I had a support, you know, my wife fully supported this vision from day one since before day one.
14:41
[SPEAKER_03]: And so just like being able to fulfill the dream, I wouldn't have that without them.
14:45
[SPEAKER_03]: And so when I find myself away from them, like now, I'm gonna go to a really busy season in the fall.
14:53
[SPEAKER_03]: And I'm like, all right, let me send somebody else to that because I already, the week before that I'm gonna be gone the whole week.
15:00
[SPEAKER_03]: I want somebody else to go because I want to, because I know two weeks after that, I got to go on a game, but I got to be there for that one.
15:05
[SPEAKER_03]: So which one can I sacrifice because I want to be home?
15:08
[SPEAKER_03]: I love baseball coaching.
15:10
[SPEAKER_03]: Like I coach my kids, assistant coach my kids baseball team, because that's my time with them, right?
15:14
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I love being all their games.
15:17
[SPEAKER_03]: I can watch the games online, yes, but I'd rather be there on the field.
15:21
[SPEAKER_03]: I love date nights with my wife.
15:23
[SPEAKER_03]: I miss those if I'm out of town, because then we can't, you know, you come back and you see that doesn't coordinate
15:29
[SPEAKER_03]: I love being at home with my church family, like just all these things that I miss when I'm on the road and I started to appreciate and value those more now and that was kind of one of the turning points from me was starting to value those times with my family when I was on the road, I started to miss those a lot.
15:45
[SPEAKER_00]: Your wife is a critical key component.
15:49
[SPEAKER_00]: It sounds like you chose will.
15:51
[SPEAKER_03]: No, she chose will.
15:54
[SPEAKER_03]: She knew her, let me put this way.
15:55
[SPEAKER_03]: She chose to play that she can mold.
15:57
[SPEAKER_03]: Right.
15:58
[SPEAKER_03]: Please, we chose, we know what our three, yeah.
16:01
[SPEAKER_03]: We choose, yeah, yeah, we chose her.
16:03
[SPEAKER_03]: I definitely, I was blessed with her.
16:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
16:07
[SPEAKER_00]: And what I'm going with that, it wasn't a nagging with really a lot because major changes in life sometimes is where you find out what you committed to and who you committed to, not to minimalize them
16:25
[SPEAKER_00]: and a lot of those conversations don't happen until life presents the scenario for what happened.
16:31
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
16:32
[SPEAKER_00]: What was the process of her buying into your dream?
16:36
[SPEAKER_00]: Or was it just always that way?
16:39
[SPEAKER_03]: No, man, from day one, she's always bought it to me.
16:46
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, now we've been married 13 years.
16:49
[SPEAKER_03]: Slow.
16:50
[SPEAKER_03]: We've been together 16.
16:51
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
16:53
[SPEAKER_03]: So she saw me coming out of college with Swagger.
16:56
[SPEAKER_03]: That was all I had.
16:56
[SPEAKER_03]: Didn't have to jump.
16:58
[SPEAKER_03]: Didn't have to.
16:58
[SPEAKER_03]: But she was like, you know, she fell in love with my charisma.
17:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
17:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, she fell in love with how I made the people around me feel.
17:07
[SPEAKER_03]: The joy that I brought to a room.
17:08
[SPEAKER_03]: That's what she fell in love with.
17:09
[SPEAKER_03]: She saw us, like, you know, he's a real genuine person.
17:13
[SPEAKER_03]: so like when I had nothing she was she was there yeah she fueled me she she encouraged me she motivated me you know within within
17:26
[SPEAKER_03]: Right, we'll didn't respect to like not doing anything crazy like yeah, you know jump out there bridge All right, I got you not like you showed you got the parachute and the and the ankle you know the attachments and all of that right See was and then we've grown up together, you know when I met her I was
17:47
[SPEAKER_03]: 22.
17:48
[SPEAKER_03]: She was about to turn 25.
17:52
[SPEAKER_03]: She was in law school out of undergrad.
17:56
[SPEAKER_03]: First job, we together, second job, we together.
18:00
[SPEAKER_03]: She passed the bar, we're together.
18:03
[SPEAKER_03]: So we've had all these milestones together, children, marriage.
18:10
[SPEAKER_03]: achieving, traveling, taking our feelings.
18:13
[SPEAKER_03]: So we've, we've blossomed together.
18:17
[SPEAKER_03]: And so within that, like, she's seen the potential in me earlier, what I said, she picked, obviously I picked the right one.
18:26
[SPEAKER_03]: But she saw the potential in me early because she's just like,
18:33
[SPEAKER_03]: You've got, you've got a, you've got a calling over your life that that's what she saw like she's my wife always tells me like I fell in love with you and I loved you don't want to marry you because I felt like you love me the way my dad loved my mom
18:52
[SPEAKER_03]: And so she saw that and so like that's what she wanted to be a part of and you know She fed that it she really fed that into me.
19:01
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, that I can feel that like now She's she's she's down from me Stowns as they come as they go and she's proven that time and time again Yeah, I she's been the rock to all of this me me traveling and knowing that
19:21
[SPEAKER_03]: somebody ain't the house cutting me down like a daddy on a road again he doing it she's not she's not speaking poorly to me to my children to her family uh... she's always always uplifting always supporting and that makes me feel like you know that as a man that makes me feel really good about what i'm doing you know what i'm saying yeah we have our difficulties right
19:47
[SPEAKER_03]: But I'm grateful that she's one that's willing to, let's talk about this, let's pray about this.
19:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Let's see, let's really try to navigate through this and make sure that, you know, there's something that we can get through.
19:59
[SPEAKER_03]: She's just always been like rooted and grounded, and I'm just super grateful for that.
20:04
[SPEAKER_00]: How smooth was the transition from corporate to entrepreneurship?
20:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Actually, it was rough for pre transition because of like all of the frustration stress that I was bringing to the household because I didn't know what to do.
20:20
[SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying?
20:20
[SPEAKER_03]: I'll take that and I'll take that.
20:22
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me, let me, we one more piece of it as you finish answered.
20:25
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm glad you say it rough because I want to kind of lean into how did getting through that process affect
20:34
[SPEAKER_00]: your leadership or your perceived leadership, like you as a leader, looking at you as the leader of your home, as your managing through what may be a chaotic time, you know?
20:45
[SPEAKER_03]: So, there was a turning point for us where it was a, and she was like, you need to figure this out, because
20:58
[SPEAKER_03]: Basically how you treat me right.
21:00
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not who I'm married.
21:01
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not who you are.
21:02
[SPEAKER_03]: So whatever you got going on What do we need to do?
21:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Is she never left me on myself to that right?
21:09
[SPEAKER_03]: She didn't leave me to myself You need to figure that out.
21:10
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm going over here.
21:12
[SPEAKER_03]: It was a Okay, well, I think what God just gave us is for us and That might be the green light that you need Because he just provided this for us, you know, and like so that
21:25
[SPEAKER_03]: until we fully realize where we were in God's calling on in that moment.
21:31
[SPEAKER_03]: That's what roughness is.
21:33
[SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying like trying to do some trying to figure something like what's wrong with you?
21:37
[SPEAKER_03]: I just feel like I got the word of the word, the weight of the world on my shoulder.
21:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I just cry and it seems like, oh, okay, yeah, okay, well.
21:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Let's take that way off.
21:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, let's talk to us.
21:49
[SPEAKER_03]: Why do you feel that way?
21:51
[SPEAKER_03]: What about this and that?
21:54
[SPEAKER_03]: And then from that we kind of, we know we had a soft that we weren't even looking at you know, I mean, but then sometimes when you just had them conversations, you talk through some stuff here.
22:01
[SPEAKER_03]: You see like some stuff that's right in front of you.
22:04
[SPEAKER_03]: And so at that point,
22:06
[SPEAKER_03]: That definitely is that transition, you know, because at that point, then I'm going to go ahead and do this and you know, she's afforded me making the call to my CEO say, hey, you're going to be in town.
22:17
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm I'm applied it.
22:19
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm in town.
22:19
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, you'll see the second coming deliver that message to him personally.
22:26
[SPEAKER_03]: the obstacles that I go through with within the business for her to be there, to let it to say, like, I'm here for you to lean on.
22:34
[SPEAKER_03]: You might take it or not, yeah.
22:36
[SPEAKER_03]: But, but, you know, if you need it, I'm here that really made a transition easier for us to kind of, you know, reestablish that foundation, but then that really helped for me not to lose my mind, you know, in that, you know, who I am in that,
22:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Because you know, it's a, it's, it's a, it's a transition.
22:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, man, like it's, it's definitely transitioning.
23:01
[SPEAKER_03]: I think one of the biggest things is men, we relate our value a little bit too much to to the dollars that we, that we bring it to a household.
23:10
[SPEAKER_03]: And I remember her telling me like, you keep saying that that's not my worth on you, but you keep saying that, um,
23:19
[SPEAKER_03]: And that was something that just had to get through, obviously in business and launch the business, starting the business, there's patches in that, even as businesses continue to go, there's patches in that, but having her support in that regard, man, was super helpful in the transition.
23:37
[SPEAKER_00]: Where did you learn, or how did you learn to trust the communication process?
23:42
[SPEAKER_00]: Because again, to most of his times,
23:47
[SPEAKER_00]: kind of bring out some things in us that we may have been able to eat the mask and we didn't even realize was on deck until they pressure amounts against you for me speaking for me that I can't figure out right that was my fear of presenting to my wife here's the problem also I don't know the answer yet.
24:08
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh man, um, still dealing with that now, so yeah, um, because I feel like I got to I got to have it and I used to snap in my wife much more than I do now like now it's like it's it's a rarity that snapper and I catch myself like Because when I realize we're on the same team and so her asking me questions is not undermining who I am.
24:33
[SPEAKER_03]: It's her trying to understand like okay, can I help you here?
24:36
[SPEAKER_03]: But he wasn't there, but it was it was definitely like a why you ask me why you ask me question why you don't trust What I'm saying is she's like I don't know it's not that I don't trust you bound
24:48
[SPEAKER_03]: if we in the middle of a ocean with no boat, yeah, what do you think is a thing to expect we don't you don't know what you're saying.
24:53
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I know what you're saying.
24:55
[SPEAKER_00]: Correct.
24:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Correct.
24:56
[SPEAKER_00]: I can.
24:57
[SPEAKER_03]: And that was one of those things.
24:58
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, we we've we've been through therapy over time with each other.
25:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
25:04
[SPEAKER_03]: And that was one of those things that that really helped me.
25:07
[SPEAKER_03]: It's like, thank you.
25:08
[SPEAKER_03]: You had to go therapy to find out that your wife is on the same team as you.
25:11
[SPEAKER_03]: It took what it's technically, you know what I did.
25:14
[SPEAKER_03]: I knew she was, but there's always just this, you know, I got to have it perfect for you.
25:20
[SPEAKER_03]: And if I don't have it, and you question me on, I hang out the answer.
25:23
[SPEAKER_03]: That's, it's really my insecurity of not having the answer.
25:25
[SPEAKER_03]: It's nothing that you've done wrong.
25:27
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
25:27
[SPEAKER_03]: So you're not burating me or anything like that.
25:29
[SPEAKER_03]: But as a man, you just feel that a times just how we've been geared and wired with this, with this over masculinity of, like, nah, you know, I got this.
25:39
[SPEAKER_03]: Right.
25:40
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.
25:42
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.
25:43
[SPEAKER_03]: So that was what they mean once I once I really understood that we're on the same team.
25:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, and knowing that that
25:52
[SPEAKER_03]: She's really there for us to elevate together and grow together.
25:57
[SPEAKER_03]: Really understand that.
25:58
[SPEAKER_03]: It took me like nine years into our marriage to really see that.
26:02
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm so okay with you saying that, especially now that you're on the other side of it, still working through whatever challenges the rise because it will continue to their rise.
26:11
[SPEAKER_00]: You have the task to shame or what it actually took to realize that, right?
26:16
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not necessarily being proud that you went that long, and for me it was longer than nine years.
26:21
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
26:21
[SPEAKER_00]: But it took what it took, thank God that in
26:24
[SPEAKER_00]: My point about choosing where is these are the things, right?
26:29
[SPEAKER_00]: Getting to the wedding is, it's a child's play, and you hope that day is not the highlight of your life together.
26:38
[SPEAKER_00]: But these things, you don't know having not seen them.
26:42
[SPEAKER_00]: And then you have an experience this as a person or with this person.
26:46
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, honestly, I, and I started to have a conversation with my parents more now about like stuff like that because I wish they would have told us what they was going through when it was going through.
26:54
[SPEAKER_03]: So that way, when I see it and I spend it myself, I know, okay, I get it.
26:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Like granted, obviously, I'm telling my my sons everything that we're going through every,
27:07
[SPEAKER_03]: Conversation that we're having that's not aligned, you know, we try not to yell at each other.
27:12
[SPEAKER_03]: We try not to yell at each other, right?
27:14
[SPEAKER_03]: Especially not in the house with Kiski, like we always had a phone with distance.
27:18
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, you know, we don't, we don't, we don't, um,
27:24
[SPEAKER_03]: We don't, we try not to be combative in front of the boy.
27:27
[SPEAKER_03]: We try not to confront each other in front of the boy.
27:29
[SPEAKER_03]: We don't try to take that somewhere else.
27:31
[SPEAKER_03]: Because we want them to see not, not the facade, but we want them to see what it means to truly love and show love versus showing frustration.
27:42
[SPEAKER_03]: When you know how you really feel about this person, but you just allow these emotions to get the best of you in that situation.
27:49
[SPEAKER_03]: And I look back,
27:50
[SPEAKER_03]: to my parents.
27:51
[SPEAKER_03]: My parents showed a lot of love to each other.
27:53
[SPEAKER_03]: So I saw that.
27:54
[SPEAKER_03]: I saw a lot of affection.
27:56
[SPEAKER_03]: But I saw also saw a number of arguments walking out.
28:04
[SPEAKER_03]: I'll be back.
28:06
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I saw that.
28:07
[SPEAKER_03]: And so even with the net, some, I'll look at, uh,
28:14
[SPEAKER_03]: time around like, I just want to get up out of here, but if you get going nowhere, okay, what I'll know what you think this is, but you ain't, you ain't leaving here, like just walking out the doors, he's like, you go over there in that room, I go over here in this room, but that's just someone though, like, like, just having some of that, you know, that having that right person, man, will really help you to navigate all of that.
28:40
[SPEAKER_03]: because somebody got a beat there to say, we don't get through this, yeah.
28:45
[SPEAKER_03]: It can't be a, I, man, forget you, forget you there.
28:50
[SPEAKER_00]: And here's the thing, with that forgetting, you think you forgot about it, and you think they forgot about it.
28:54
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just compound, yeah.
28:55
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just growing, yeah.
28:57
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember one time, early in marriage, probably five or six years, we had three kids and we were at my parents' house.
29:11
[SPEAKER_00]: And I don't blow up.
29:12
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, that's just not my, it's a whole different thing.
29:15
[SPEAKER_00]: Never, I don't recall ever screaming on my wife.
29:18
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm not saying that to both me, I'm just not, is not that with her, specifically.
29:25
[SPEAKER_00]: And I left the house in anger, but I didn't yell to say anything about it.
29:30
[SPEAKER_00]: My father let me know how disappointing he was in me because he saw he didn't he didn't intervene or or in a jack But he let me know in a way that that's not something that's not how you do it.
29:40
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and it wasn't that what I was feeling in the moment was wrong But would you like what is the what is the example that you're setting right because For me, I think I've done Don't know the yellow
29:55
[SPEAKER_00]: think I've done a lot of damage, it had to be corrected through nonverbal, right?
30:00
[SPEAKER_00]: Because I can convey a look or an or a disappointment and then not saying anything about it.
30:07
[SPEAKER_00]: So now the environment is confused, like something said that off, he didn't yell a scream.
30:15
[SPEAKER_00]: He never came back and addressed it.
30:17
[SPEAKER_00]: So I got to be, I had to learn to be mindful of.
30:21
[SPEAKER_00]: um, even in my attempt to do the right thing.
30:26
[SPEAKER_00]: How is it being received, to perceive in my family?
30:30
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
30:30
[SPEAKER_00]: And now I have adult kids and I still have younger kids and I'm seeing.
30:33
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
30:34
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
30:36
[SPEAKER_00]: All right.
30:36
[SPEAKER_00]: We could talk to each other as adults and and how else than the house, which is cool and somewhat.
30:42
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
30:43
[SPEAKER_00]: Some would have a challenge at the same time, but having them in parallel and I roughs it off and it's like man, it's a blessing to see number one, it's still having a relationship with children.
30:54
[SPEAKER_00]: For them to still want to be around, it's still consult you and still care about what you think.
31:00
[SPEAKER_00]: Doesn't mean they actually do what you think, but they can't.
31:03
[SPEAKER_00]: Play the examples of that.
31:04
[SPEAKER_00]: Of that happening.
31:05
[SPEAKER_00]: But what's important to you,
31:12
[SPEAKER_01]: First of all, how old are you son?
31:13
[SPEAKER_01]: You had two sons, two boys, two boys, 12 and 11.
31:16
[SPEAKER_01]: 12 and 11.
31:17
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
31:18
[SPEAKER_01]: Ooh.
31:21
[SPEAKER_01]: Did it?
31:23
[SPEAKER_00]: How long have you been entrepreneur for three years?
31:26
[SPEAKER_00]: Three years.
31:27
[SPEAKER_00]: Did they know different you?
31:29
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
31:31
[SPEAKER_00]: How are you saying they're respond to who you're becoming now?
31:35
[SPEAKER_03]: Actually, you know what honestly though,
31:40
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't know if it is a different me.
31:46
[SPEAKER_03]: Is it a more available, more?
31:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Is definitely more available to me, but I was becoming more available before I left on to Microsoft.
31:54
[SPEAKER_03]: And I was, you know, I've, interestingly enough with entrepreneurship, I say I have more control, so I get to be more, you know, present with schedules, I think.
32:08
[SPEAKER_01]: Man, maybe in the last,
32:14
[SPEAKER_01]: three years.
32:15
[SPEAKER_01]: I might have missed 10 games.
32:20
[SPEAKER_03]: Now we play three to five games on a weekend.
32:23
[SPEAKER_03]: That's right.
32:24
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
32:24
[SPEAKER_03]: So 10 games that could be three games.
32:26
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
32:28
[SPEAKER_03]: One I missed.
32:29
[SPEAKER_03]: Man, I missed my my son's first home run.
32:31
[SPEAKER_03]: I was on the road.
32:32
[SPEAKER_03]: I was watching though that I was watching.
32:36
[SPEAKER_03]: I was in LA in my little guy.
32:40
[SPEAKER_03]: You just see it hit the ball.
32:42
[SPEAKER_03]: And you can't see what you can't see the ball on the on the video screen because I'm watching on my phone and then you just see the second basements just lift his hands up.
32:49
[SPEAKER_03]: I was like, he just hit his arm right here.
32:51
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm over the fence over the fence.
32:53
[SPEAKER_02]: That's good.
32:53
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, I'm like, man.
32:55
[SPEAKER_03]: But I saw it, you know, but I definitely think they they they understand like my feel me being more available, you know, picking them up from school, most days, almost every day that's my that's my that's my thing.
33:11
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I'm going to go to school.
33:13
[SPEAKER_03]: For sure.
33:13
[SPEAKER_03]: Pick them up.
33:14
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm home.
33:14
[SPEAKER_03]: I should they start their homework.
33:18
[SPEAKER_03]: And that's something that I value, like I value didn't feel like they have a close enough connection with that to where, like I'm not your friend, I don't want them to think I'm their friend, I want them to think that they have a loving father who they know, you know, we play, hey.
33:34
[SPEAKER_03]: our family like we have we have a text through it that's full of memes yeah and full of of uh uh uh uh instagram videos parenting time who this who's this which one of us is this bro that's dad you know it's like hmm that's dad well that's mom like but they are as they growing up they I feel like they I would say that they appreciate
34:00
[SPEAKER_03]: who, and it's not who I'm, I feel like it's more so who I'm becoming other dad just in general, and I'm not necessarily because of because of what my profession is.
34:08
[SPEAKER_03]: It's the, the appreciation that I have for being their example for, you know, really wanting them to see everything.
34:20
[SPEAKER_03]: This is the first, this is the first summer.
34:25
[SPEAKER_03]: And like, since my boys got past four, six years ago, this is the first time they haven't used it.
34:30
[SPEAKER_03]: And it was just a busy summer, it was a busy time, interesting dynamic in the business.
34:35
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, like, for me, that stinks.
34:40
[SPEAKER_03]: You could've done like, oh, I want you guys to be able to see so much of the world that when you become an adult, you realize that the world is not
34:50
[SPEAKER_03]: Disoto, Dallas, Donkaville, Cedar Hill, Grand Prairie, I want them to know like, I've been to Paris, I've been to London, I've been to Barcelona, I've been to Toronto.
35:01
[SPEAKER_03]: We're also my going, right?
35:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Know that there's opportunities for them everywhere, not just where they are.
35:08
[SPEAKER_03]: So things are working out here.
35:09
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm gonna go somewhere else, because I've seen it and felt that.
35:16
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, like, just being able to mold them into like many versions of me, I feel like I made my dad, like I, before I was 10 from my dad retired, I lived in five different cities, two different countries, you know.
35:30
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, just being able to, to show them just opportunities.
35:36
[SPEAKER_03]: And I think that they're feeling that more.
35:40
[SPEAKER_03]: because as I'm a chore and I try to see what my priorities are, how I relate to them, just being more present, being more vocal with them.
35:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
35:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, I think that they're seeing that now.
35:50
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
35:51
[SPEAKER_00]: Not to father, not to friend.
35:54
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm your father, my father, you just say, I'm your father, I'm not your friend.
35:58
[SPEAKER_00]: With such a,
36:01
[SPEAKER_00]: such a normal concept for me to accept and implement as I became a father, but I see some takes.
36:10
[SPEAKER_00]: So, takes when people don't engage with me, they feel differently about that.
36:15
[SPEAKER_00]: We can coordinate with just girls, and I'm going to invite you to a panel because I...
36:20
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't want to give my whole take on that, but I'm definitely team.
36:24
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm your father.
36:24
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
36:25
[SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't mean that there's an absence of friendly necessary career career career career.
36:29
[SPEAKER_03]: But if it, it's like a, it's like a boss, right?
36:34
[SPEAKER_03]: If, if you have a boss,
36:36
[SPEAKER_03]: that doesn't instill the fact that they're the boss, you forget that there's a hierarchy here, and I will have to fire you to give you a line.
36:43
[SPEAKER_00]: To your review.
36:43
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, and so when it comes to fatherhood and parenting, there has to be structure in a hierarchy.
36:50
[SPEAKER_03]: At the end of the day, somebody has to make the call.
36:53
[SPEAKER_03]: And if we're friends, you don't respect me to make the call.
36:56
[SPEAKER_03]: You don't respect my decision to make the call.
36:58
[SPEAKER_03]: Right, and so like,
36:59
[SPEAKER_00]: You know what yeah to your point we can be friendly my child can love me like live me in a joy being around me like a friend But at the same time they go no, no, no, no, no.
37:10
[SPEAKER_00]: I really think it's a circuit log and because I think
37:14
[SPEAKER_00]: It's an interesting topic to discuss, but what I really think the essence of it is, is that what friendship entails is a subset of what I believe fatherhood is.
37:25
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, true.
37:27
[SPEAKER_00]: So if it's a subset, why would I go by the sub type?
37:30
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, correct.
37:31
[SPEAKER_03]: Like not, correct.
37:31
[SPEAKER_03]: It's good.
37:33
[SPEAKER_00]: A father doesn't mean I'm your enemy, but a father does mean I'm going to make decisions out of best for your life first.
37:37
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
37:38
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes we're friends, fun comes first, sometimes friends don't know better than what they know.
37:43
[SPEAKER_00]: I've seen a lot more life than you, tell my kids I've been every age you're about to be.
37:47
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
37:48
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's just going to keep going like that for sure.
37:50
[SPEAKER_00]: So I have something to offer.
37:52
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, we've been dancing around not that it needs a super introduction, but the business.
37:58
[SPEAKER_00]: What is it?
38:00
[SPEAKER_03]: And black men's word is a voice of black men globally.
38:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, yeah, it was said that before.
38:08
[SPEAKER_03]: Well, what we've, yes, you said that before.
38:11
[SPEAKER_03]: What we've built from the balance of content, storytelling, experiential, it truly embodies who we are as, like say, upperly mobile black men, men that have a mindset of doing better, being greater,
38:27
[SPEAKER_03]: and experiencing more.
38:29
[SPEAKER_03]: What started as a simple, just, slogan to change the narrative, now is an embodiment, right?
38:37
[SPEAKER_03]: Long change the narrative because when we go to Atlanta and we do these flash miles from all the brothers coming to suits and they're together, we're also raising school supplies for imagness Jones out of the military school.
38:47
[SPEAKER_03]: Yep.
38:48
[SPEAKER_03]: When we go to,
38:50
[SPEAKER_03]: Los Angeles, and we do an event with Woodford Reserve for Kentucky Derby.
38:54
[SPEAKER_03]: We're also raising money for bear truth, which is a homelessness, combating unit, trying to get people off the streets.
39:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
39:05
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, so just being able to not only have a presence that speaks to the fun and enjoyment of being a black man and building a community and brotherhood, we have guys from that are part of the brotherhood from everywhere from Los Angeles, California, all the way to a cry God, you know, we've done events in New York and Toronto and Paris and Montreal and Miami and now like along the way we're picking up guys and bringing them into the
39:34
[SPEAKER_03]: to where they feel seen.
39:35
[SPEAKER_03]: They feel heard the stories that are on the social media channels reflect them and they like, yeah, I would like to go do that or you know, taking them to new experiences like Kentucky Derby, like art balsal, like essence fest and being able to have these prejudices, but not only just being there, but being there and seeing somebody I know there, like that's a difference.
39:54
[SPEAKER_03]: When you walk into a roomy, you know somebody, I felt that in corporate.
39:58
[SPEAKER_03]: where I was like, eh, what a brother in the room, right?
40:00
[SPEAKER_00]: There he is.
40:01
[SPEAKER_03]: You don't have been like, it would have been me and being able to have that.
40:04
[SPEAKER_03]: That's really kind of like what I took from the corporate world into this movement, connecting brothers and places so that way they see fit, they feel seen, they feel heard, they feel welcomed.
40:15
[SPEAKER_03]: and then from there, all you got to do is allow us space, the brotherhoods that have come from that when we were in Vegas at the top of the year, one of the guys there after the flashmar was over with he was like, hey man, I appreciate y'all bringing here, y'all don't know like this, being a part of this movement from me over the last four years has really helped me grow and develop
40:36
[SPEAKER_03]: But also, man, I met one of my closest friends here.
40:39
[SPEAKER_03]: And in front of all, y'all, I like y'all to ask to me or to help me to ask him to be one of my groomsmen and my men in my wedding.
40:46
[SPEAKER_03]: And it was like, just moments from that, because he like, I met this guy here, but we've developed this relationship over the last four years.
40:51
[SPEAKER_03]: Bro, I would love, I would love you to stay by my side as I, as I made it my bride.
40:56
[SPEAKER_03]: And like, just those connections, like business relationships guys have met at a flash mob, right in the event that we've done, our podcast,
41:05
[SPEAKER_03]: one-on-one with other black men or black women who have the support our community where they're just giving motivation through their own experiences.
41:15
[SPEAKER_03]: But it's real talk for us is black men to hear that.
41:18
[SPEAKER_03]: And it's a movement man that again comes back to content, storytelling, and experiences that we take together as black men to really help us change our own narrative from the inside out.
41:36
[SPEAKER_00]: the latest thing that I'm saying, I don't know who's doing that, where you're all opposing and it's moving, it closed the train.
41:42
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's, that's for now, I'm not, I'm a little salty.
41:46
[SPEAKER_00]: Little salty on the low, because I'm trying to figure out what I'm saying, I'm like, wait a minute, can I?
41:50
[SPEAKER_03]: So I'm a certain, saddery blanks.
41:53
[SPEAKER_03]: He's, he wears my name.
41:54
[SPEAKER_03]: He's, yeah.
41:55
[SPEAKER_03]: My God, he is, his edits are top tier.
42:00
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah.
42:01
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm joking, right?
42:02
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm truly inspired by it.
42:05
[SPEAKER_00]: But when I see your brand consistently, the word that comes to mind my consistently is excellence.
42:12
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, for sure, right?
42:14
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm, I'm over here.
42:15
[SPEAKER_00]: So I feel the way about things, right?
42:17
[SPEAKER_00]: I have some things all the way there.
42:18
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm on my mind.
42:19
[SPEAKER_00]: 90s hip-hop is to be like, there's, so take this with us.
42:23
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
42:24
[SPEAKER_00]: Take it, don't take it.
42:24
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, sir.
42:27
[SPEAKER_00]: In my mind, excellence today seems to be either losing this value or becoming way more subjective.
42:33
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what, what is and why is excellence important to you as a person and as the brand?
42:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I think, um, excellence, it, um, first and foremost, excellence should be, it becomes a standard.
42:51
[SPEAKER_03]: So, you don't allow yourself to know the panel.
42:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, another panel.
42:54
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, um, excellence is not meant to be excluding.
43:02
[SPEAKER_03]: It's meant to be in aspiration.
43:05
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, excellence is being the president of the United States of the black man wearing a tan suit and everybody buraged you 40 self-black people.
43:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Go get like, nigga ain't gonna pop with that suit.
43:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Come on, press, you know what I mean like?
43:17
[SPEAKER_03]: But that's excellent.
43:18
[SPEAKER_03]: It's exuding this or I'm supposed to be here.
43:22
[SPEAKER_03]: Not only am I supposed to be here.
43:25
[SPEAKER_03]: my people supposed to be here.
43:26
[SPEAKER_03]: For me, that's what excellence is.
43:30
[SPEAKER_03]: But there are factions that believe that, okay, well, you talk about black excellence, you're leaving people out.
43:35
[SPEAKER_03]: Like you're saying that these people aren't good enough.
43:38
[SPEAKER_03]: And I'm saying, I'm not saying that.
43:41
[SPEAKER_03]: What I'm saying is what I see and what I'm striving to be, if you're not seeing or striving to be like that, that's on you.
43:48
[SPEAKER_03]: That's your decision.
43:50
[SPEAKER_03]: But what I'm trying to go, excellence is an echelon that I should look at and not be intimidated by, it's like, how did, how did they get there?
44:01
[SPEAKER_03]: I said for nearly very aspirational.
44:03
[SPEAKER_00]: Very different.
44:04
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, from the norm.
44:06
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I'm standing man, you, you, you, you, you tap no, some, like I've, I've been having these thoughts over the last 30 days about, um, am I just the only, like, is it's, it's, it's standards, and I don't want to get into,
44:19
[SPEAKER_00]: certain topics about what prompted the thought, at least not right now, but standards seem to be coming subjective, right?
44:28
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
44:29
[SPEAKER_00]: And my fear with, not even my fear, my, my, my, um, a guiding concern, as I was rearing children.
44:41
[SPEAKER_00]: was for them to understand that though this world is not fair, you still have to operate within it, right?
44:47
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
44:47
[SPEAKER_00]: And I can't give you pipe dreams about how life isn't, only for you to go out there and operate in it, and it not work for you, right?
44:59
[SPEAKER_00]: And you're not able to work within it.
45:05
[SPEAKER_00]: Black men's wear, black excellence,
45:12
[SPEAKER_00]: Corrupted some feathers could scare some organizations and scare some demographics of people Before we get to that number one, how did you know that?
45:26
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's stay there.
45:26
[SPEAKER_01]: Let's stay there.
45:30
[SPEAKER_01]: What is the toll on you?
45:33
[SPEAKER_01]: As a visionary in excellence.
45:36
[SPEAKER_01]: So
45:42
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, the first time I got back last from my community, I was floored.
45:50
[SPEAKER_03]: I was absolutely like, wait, wait, what?
45:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Hey, bro, you see this on Twitter at that time, you'll still do it.
45:55
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm not even on there.
45:56
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, you see this on Twitter, huh?
45:58
[SPEAKER_03]: What?
45:59
[SPEAKER_03]: What are you going in on what?
46:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Y'all, cause y'all men and suits.
46:06
[SPEAKER_03]: What?
46:07
[SPEAKER_03]: And it was a, it was a lot of, oh, I mean, projected.
46:13
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, I'm sure they're not this.
46:15
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, I'm this and this, I'm sure they're not this.
46:18
[SPEAKER_03]: I can almost guarantee you they love white women.
46:21
[SPEAKER_03]: Or like, I mean, it, it was so much.
46:23
[SPEAKER_03]: And I was just like, how does our joy cause you frustration within your community?
46:33
[SPEAKER_01]: Within the community.
46:38
[SPEAKER_01]: It was just one of those things where I was just absolutely stunned by, but I saw guys continue to show up.
46:50
[SPEAKER_03]: I saw people that weren't on the internet, but like physically they're in person.
46:53
[SPEAKER_03]: I heard their testimonials like, man, bro, I just want to say thank you.
46:56
[SPEAKER_03]: I've never been around as many black men before.
46:58
[SPEAKER_03]: anywhere, or Dr. Jamal Bryant, good friend of mine.
47:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Jamal was like, Bronx, I'm a figure out how you get all these brothers to show up in the morning.
47:10
[SPEAKER_03]: And he suits shirts with no women, no liquor, no party.
47:15
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, you get them there together as a community.
47:18
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm sort of figuring it out.
47:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Cause he's like, I got the biggest church in Atlanta.
47:21
[SPEAKER_02]: And you know what, guys, to come to this, that I get to come to church.
47:26
[SPEAKER_03]: But it's as I just continue to hear from other men who were, and I tell you all around the world, you know, we're going, we've done now, probably 25, almost 25 markets, okay.
47:41
[SPEAKER_03]: Globally, and the story is the same
47:48
[SPEAKER_03]: Man, I saw this and all that.
47:51
[SPEAKER_03]: I got to be a part of it.
47:52
[SPEAKER_03]: Just because it looked like them guys think like me, you know what I mean?
47:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, do you guys just...
47:59
[SPEAKER_03]: It won't do something and I'm talking about blue collar all the way to white collar everywhere in between.
48:05
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
48:05
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, we have celebrities that come to the flash, we have, uh, I remember we were in Charlotte Bro and this man's like, bro, I just got out, I just started to change your beard.
48:16
[SPEAKER_03]: I just got out like two months ago, my sister was like, you need to be here.
48:19
[SPEAKER_03]: She got me to suit and I'm here and I'm very glad that she got me here, bro.
48:23
[SPEAKER_03]: So like man, he was like standing off because he's,
48:25
[SPEAKER_03]: As I am, you know, start talking to him.
48:27
[SPEAKER_03]: He's like, man, what is he like, my sister told me come this, she put, and I was like, well, yeah, start talking about, he's like, well, who to do that like, they started it like, it's me.
48:37
[SPEAKER_03]: And he was, for him, he was like, and this is something I'm extremely grateful for, like when I talk about the humility, he was like, what are you talking to me right now?
48:48
[SPEAKER_03]: You got all these, Charlotte was a big one.
48:50
[SPEAKER_03]: And just that though, that for me continue how those moments, that's what inspired me to get, that got me through the noise.
49:01
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
49:02
[SPEAKER_03]: So when I got past that, it, it was big for a little while like, but I think the thing about it was we did it so much.
49:12
[SPEAKER_03]: We made it through the noise.
49:13
[SPEAKER_03]: People had the noise.
49:14
[SPEAKER_03]: They thought that they were like, like a devalue who we are and hate us out the door.
49:22
[SPEAKER_03]: But we still attend to us down.
49:24
[SPEAKER_03]: We kept going.
49:25
[SPEAKER_03]: We kept telling the story that we kept going.
49:27
[SPEAKER_03]: And then we had our day and after a while, our...
49:31
[SPEAKER_03]: family or online families are to come to the fence.
49:34
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, we got to fight a little more.
49:35
[SPEAKER_03]: They're going to fight it for us.
49:38
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, so I was like that was that was one of the things that where it took a toll on me because I had to take it.
49:43
[SPEAKER_03]: I had to take myself personally out of it.
49:45
[SPEAKER_03]: Like they're not they don't know me.
49:47
[SPEAKER_03]: They don't they don't know.
49:48
[SPEAKER_03]: They really don't know the guys that are here.
49:50
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, but they're projecting something to try to break down and one of
50:02
[SPEAKER_03]: Empowers everybody, but I'm very much masculinity.
50:06
[SPEAKER_03]: You know what I mean?
50:07
[SPEAKER_03]: Like, it's especially in a world where black masculine men are often shunned and not giving the light anymore.
50:15
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, from men who are more feminine leading,
50:24
[SPEAKER_03]: I love that by my platform like men feel like men when they see the stories there and again and not, not, not, not, not, not, um, belittling anybody's experience or who they are, our platform speaks to, you know, to the men that we, my podcast, I have men that are LGBTQ plus, but we're not going to get on
50:51
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not the primary point of our conversation versus a lot of other outlets and unfair for them in a sense, a lot of other outlets, they forget the fact they're black men and they just want to talk about that.
51:02
[SPEAKER_03]: And so I'm like, all right, that's cool, but like you're the black men, you grew up in this city, you grew up in this and you've overcome these obstacles in these things, like let's get to the root of who you are as a person, not your sexuality.
51:12
[SPEAKER_03]: And to be a platform that leans into just who we are as black men and brings that out.
51:19
[SPEAKER_03]: But for me, just getting through a lot of that noise, but what I miss you took a toll is it's it's it's part for the course now guys who I'm who who authorized you to dream this big.
51:38
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh man, this is this vision came straight from God.
51:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I, uh, uh, people, so a lot of people caught up with us after George Floyd, 2020, right?
51:47
[SPEAKER_03]: I've been doing this already for two years prior to that, um, the one, the thing that, the, the, the moment that really gave me the, the vision was Philando Castillo.
52:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
52:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Philando Castillo.
52:06
[SPEAKER_03]: For those that don't know, because this was, I mean, I won't stay for Landokatsu with like 2016.
52:13
[SPEAKER_03]: 2016, yeah, 2016, 2017.
52:14
[SPEAKER_03]: Wow.
52:15
[SPEAKER_03]: And he was killed in his car because he told the officer that he had licensed the carry, was also asking for his license.
52:25
[SPEAKER_03]: And he's like, it's a small wallet.
52:26
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm letting you know though, I have licensed the carry, so I do have a weapon on me.
52:30
[SPEAKER_03]: But I'm reaching for my wallet.
52:32
[SPEAKER_03]: Was clear and as calm as that.
52:35
[SPEAKER_03]: He goes for it, and the police officer, feared for his life, is shoot him in the chest, in the car with his fiance on this side, his daughter in the back seat.
52:46
[SPEAKER_03]: And that was the first time that I remember seeing Facebook live where we saw police interaction and the man died on Facebook live.
52:56
[SPEAKER_03]: And for me, that was really heavy because you had the wife, you had the child.
53:01
[SPEAKER_03]: And at that time,
53:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, yeah.
53:03
[SPEAKER_03]: I was deaf.
53:04
[SPEAKER_03]: It was 2016 because my my oldest was like super little.
53:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, my youngest was a baby.
53:12
[SPEAKER_03]: So it was a fall of 2016 and like I remember, you know, the moments I looked down at I saw the story and I then I would really treat me up with my saw how the police were trying to tend to narrative by this man.
53:25
[SPEAKER_03]: He wasn't, he didn't have a bad ground.
53:28
[SPEAKER_03]: He was a good father in all of these things and the way that the news, I mean, they were scrouncing for something.
53:37
[SPEAKER_03]: So that way, the police officer had the public perception, the positive, you know, the court of public opinion.
53:46
[SPEAKER_03]: And like that was a moment rather than, you know, before that,
53:50
[SPEAKER_03]: We didn't have a lot of, it was a lot of great area.
53:54
[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, a lot of great area around the interaction.
53:57
[SPEAKER_03]: So it's kind of like a, yeah.
54:00
[SPEAKER_03]: But probably, you know, this might have happened and they probably could spin it.
54:04
[SPEAKER_03]: But that was one of those ones where it was clear.
54:06
[SPEAKER_03]: It was clear.
54:08
[SPEAKER_03]: It was, it was, and the way they tried to, they were trying to spin it, that was a moment for me, I was like, man, I've seen,
54:16
[SPEAKER_03]: This one, this one, this one, this one, this one, and it had become desensitized to seeing black men die at the hand of law enforcement.
54:26
[SPEAKER_03]: And then how they tried the story that they told about the black man.
54:30
[SPEAKER_03]: And like for me, I was like, they would no longer be able to tell stories like this and we are desensitized to it and we accept it.
54:38
[SPEAKER_03]: that was the moment where I was like, all right, you know, social media, you know, pages, you've done this before, do a page geared to the positive image of black men, because I was like, I want to put out so much positive content about black men that when they show a negative image of a black man,
54:55
[SPEAKER_03]: We're going to, we're going to voice our against that.
54:58
[SPEAKER_03]: We're going to say it's no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
55:21
[SPEAKER_03]: show us in the white right way and that's what really lost the platform because it was like nah man, it's just on too many images of men that don't look like me that don't represent who I am but also don't represent where we aspire to be the media and this you know this might come from some of the the college education that I have around
55:44
[SPEAKER_03]: psychology and sociology, and how they work together.
55:49
[SPEAKER_03]: Psychologically, if I can convince this one person that this is who they are.
55:55
[SPEAKER_03]: And then I can socialize that and now get it to the macro level to where all of these men feel like this is who they are.
56:01
[SPEAKER_03]: And if you fall to the track, it becomes a norm for you.
56:05
[SPEAKER_03]: So I would like, well,
56:06
[SPEAKER_03]: The psychology, and I'm representing here is that these black men are leading, they're strong, they're present, they're in these communities.
56:14
[SPEAKER_03]: And then not only am I going to get that one person to feel it, I'm going to, I'm going to socialize it.
56:18
[SPEAKER_03]: So that way, the masses feel that way about themselves.
56:21
[SPEAKER_03]: And we take our own narrative that we take our own futures back.
56:24
[SPEAKER_03]: We don't allow ourselves to become because we're inspiring and motivating that next brother like Mabro.
56:30
[SPEAKER_03]: No, no, we didn't seem better than that.
56:33
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not our path.
56:34
[SPEAKER_03]: That's not what we're going to go.
56:35
[SPEAKER_03]: And we kicked ourselves and bring ourselves out of it.
56:39
[SPEAKER_03]: So coming back to like, that's why I've been on this path.
56:47
[SPEAKER_03]: I haven't given up and that's what was given to me was that I have to provide the alternative because the media is not going to do it in the abundance by which they provide the negative.
56:59
[SPEAKER_03]: Take anything we think about the news, the news is meant to be alarming.
57:03
[SPEAKER_03]: So in most instances, they're going to report on what you're going to see is the stuff that's going to be alarming for the ratings and the reviews.
57:09
[SPEAKER_03]: I understood that part, but at the same time, I'm like, okay, well, if I know that that's how the system is, why not do what I know to do on this social side and try to break that and and combat that.
57:20
[SPEAKER_00]: So yeah, alarming is one thing, alarming in the absence of truth.
57:27
[SPEAKER_01]: or a compromise truth to some all to get the very much different.
57:30
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, what does the what does the platform go?
57:33
[SPEAKER_00]: What is?
57:36
[SPEAKER_01]: I was saying with success, look, like because I believe you're living in it.
57:40
[SPEAKER_03]: If you were telling it, yeah, what is it go?
57:42
[SPEAKER_03]: Man, uh, uh, I always make the, uh, I started off making this comparison before.
57:49
[SPEAKER_03]: I was like, man, I want to be essence from it.
57:53
[SPEAKER_03]: So you think about, ha ha ha ha.
57:57
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, tight.
57:58
[SPEAKER_00]: Because my grand dream is that this platform is owned for me.
58:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Hmm.
58:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Hmm.
58:05
[SPEAKER_03]: T. See, I- Well, that's just does from men for women.
58:09
[SPEAKER_03]: Black women.
58:10
[SPEAKER_03]: It's the voice.
58:12
[SPEAKER_03]: It's the destination.
58:15
[SPEAKER_03]: It's the representation.
58:19
[SPEAKER_03]: that in powers and motivates black women and has been doing so for decades.
58:25
[SPEAKER_03]: And for black men.
58:27
[SPEAKER_03]: You don't necessarily have one of those that doesn't have an attachment to something else, right?
58:35
[SPEAKER_03]: An attachment to a profession.
58:37
[SPEAKER_03]: An attachment to a fraternity.
58:39
[SPEAKER_03]: An attachment to, like, just be black, bro.
58:42
[SPEAKER_03]: You don't say, like, just be a black man.
58:46
[SPEAKER_03]: And that's my desire for this platform as it could seem to rise to be that voice to wear like an essence, black man.
58:58
[SPEAKER_03]: We won't work a child.
58:59
[SPEAKER_03]: We're a BT.
59:00
[SPEAKER_03]: Man, y'all just know black men so well, like you've built this community.
59:03
[SPEAKER_03]: We want to work with y'all, complex.
59:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, we have hip-hop culture, but man.
59:08
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, there's other echelon of black men, like we want to be a part of that.
59:12
[SPEAKER_03]: to where we can then become the destination, which we are.
59:15
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, we say we're going to go to this city and we have guys that travel in.
59:19
[SPEAKER_03]: Now, granted, right now it's a lot of different pockets and over the next 12 months, you're going to see a difference in how that's presented.
59:26
[SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
59:27
[SPEAKER_03]: I love to do a, I love to do an annual takeover of a market to where I'm not going to divide you like, okay, go to this city, go to LA and go to Charlotte, go to Chicago.
59:42
[SPEAKER_03]: You got nine months to think about it on this date meet us here.
59:46
[SPEAKER_03]: We take over a city It's like we tell me I'm a member.
59:48
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm a I'm a cap.
59:49
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm a new you know what I'm saying and so I see how
59:53
[SPEAKER_03]: Um, I've been to national conferences and see, you know, those kinds of things.
59:57
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, but for black men's were for us, it just, it just, who we are, um, I want to be that voice for black men to wear, like, say kind of coming back to the beginning, black many, there are a part of it or aspiring to understand it.
1:00:13
[SPEAKER_03]: To then become a part of it is, is where I see success.
1:00:17
[SPEAKER_03]: And to your point, Nate, there's, I'm living in, I'm living in the milestones.
1:00:23
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:00:24
[SPEAKER_03]: They get us there.
1:00:25
[SPEAKER_03]: I mean, I'm extremely grateful for just to continue new followers, new engages, new attendees, new subscribers.
1:00:34
[SPEAKER_03]: because they're going to tell somebody else and I'm just really trying to try to build evangelists for this for this mission for this movement just to continue to be the voice for black men.
1:00:42
[SPEAKER_03]: I will tell you one of those triggers from me was like, oh, this is really working now and I was in Africa and a guy knew me by face.
1:00:51
[SPEAKER_03]: And he was like, hey, wait, wait, wait, you're the guy.
1:00:54
[SPEAKER_03]: It pulls out his phone.
1:00:56
[SPEAKER_03]: I'm eating at a restaurant in Ghana.
1:00:58
[SPEAKER_03]: He pulled out his phone and
1:01:04
[SPEAKER_03]: Cause I like what these brothers represent, man.
1:01:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
1:01:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
1:01:08
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, wow.
1:01:09
[SPEAKER_00]: He is keep on loving man.
1:01:12
[SPEAKER_00]: This South Africa is a thing.
1:01:14
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a cool, it's a thing.
1:01:17
[SPEAKER_00]: And I part of my corporate responsibility was managing government contracts and sub-saving, West Africa.
1:01:22
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so I got to visit a few countries and I just happened to finnity for it.
1:01:26
[SPEAKER_00]: But I want to go back and experience.
1:01:27
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
1:01:28
[SPEAKER_00]: I went there for work.
1:01:29
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
1:01:29
[SPEAKER_00]: Land and night work all day.
1:01:30
[SPEAKER_00]: For sure.
1:01:31
[SPEAKER_00]: For a few days, leave and night.
1:01:32
[SPEAKER_01]: For sure.
1:01:33
[SPEAKER_00]: Not really enjoyed it.
1:01:35
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to wrap with this man, you just, it's the, your first time on the show, which implies in my mind that it couldn't have again.
1:01:43
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
1:01:44
[SPEAKER_00]: But the full title of the show that I don't say much is dear son, what I wish my father told me, that's the emptiness of the show.
1:01:52
[SPEAKER_00]: Uh, what's up, the next you wish your father told you?
1:01:55
[SPEAKER_01]: How, man.
1:02:03
[SPEAKER_01]: I wish my father would have told me earlier on that it is okay to be vulnerable because vulnerability helps you grow.
1:02:17
[SPEAKER_03]: And that comes from my father relationship with his father when my grandfather was very
1:02:31
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, you know, my dad left home to go to the military at 18, would see the world, but to that shift in my dad from the, the jovial young man that I'm learning that he was now to who, you know, experience.
1:02:52
[SPEAKER_03]: I experienced that was very, very military.
1:02:56
[SPEAKER_03]: You know what I'm saying?
1:02:57
[SPEAKER_03]: But it was, it was always
1:03:00
[SPEAKER_03]: And it wasn't, it wasn't like a beat tough because boys don't, you know, a thing.
1:03:09
[SPEAKER_03]: It was just, it's just how he's what it is.
1:03:12
[SPEAKER_03]: President himself was a very tough, figured out, beat a leader, figured out.
1:03:22
[SPEAKER_03]: And within that, he didn't talk about vulnerability until I was an adult.
1:03:27
[SPEAKER_03]: And so I just wish that I would have learned that younger instead of in my thirties.
1:03:33
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
1:03:36
[SPEAKER_03]: But now I preach vulnerability everywhere I go because of vulnerability is not a weakness.
1:03:42
[SPEAKER_03]: It's truly a strength.
1:03:43
[SPEAKER_03]: You know, I feel like I'm, I might have said some people when I say this, but I feel like bottling things up on the inside is not a strength.
1:03:52
[SPEAKER_03]: It's not as it's caused for a disaster.
1:03:54
[SPEAKER_03]: It's learned behavior.
1:03:55
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
1:03:56
[SPEAKER_03]: And so, but actually being able to be mature and be vulnerable and I need help.
1:04:01
[SPEAKER_03]: I can't figure this out.
1:04:03
[SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.
1:04:04
[SPEAKER_03]: That only makes you stronger quicker.
1:04:06
[SPEAKER_03]: Quicker.
1:04:07
[SPEAKER_03]: And so that's one of the things and pops you should tell me a long time but I could be vulnerable to the way that I was grown man.
1:04:13
[SPEAKER_03]: But I actually do appreciate though that my dad different like instilled a lot in me because he was a very present father, very, very good father in every guard.
1:04:24
[SPEAKER_03]: But if he, if he, if he, if he let me be me, you know, understand that I could be me earlier, I wish I would have got that.
1:04:34
[SPEAKER_00]: How can people find you?
1:04:36
[SPEAKER_00]: If you want to be found.
1:04:37
[SPEAKER_03]: So I do want to be found.
1:04:39
[SPEAKER_03]: You can find me on my personal platform.
1:04:41
[SPEAKER_03]: I'll give you that first.
1:04:43
[SPEAKER_03]: My Instagram at my STERBROUSS-A-RD.
1:04:47
[SPEAKER_03]: That's at Mr. Bruce Sard.
1:04:50
[SPEAKER_03]: The platform is a black menswear.
1:04:52
[SPEAKER_03]: You can find us on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, YouTube, subscribe to our YouTube channel.
1:05:00
[SPEAKER_03]: For the checking with black menswear,
1:05:04
[SPEAKER_03]: We put on Instagram on YouTube, blackminswear.com and definitely turn on your notifications because the thing that I hate people to say the most of the, I know you's going to be in my city and we were there and we had a great time and you missed the opportunity to become a part of the brotherhood of part of the network.
1:05:22
[SPEAKER_03]: I love when.
1:05:24
[SPEAKER_03]: when as we go along this this journey guys are able to become a part but i also love when moms bring their sons bring their brothers uh... women bring their husbands to be a part and they find their tribe as a part of that too so learn a non-social media and then meet us in person nay and rape we saw ladies and gentlemen you're welcome uh... like i said subscribe if you haven't done that already but that's gonna do a footage episode we appreciate you guys god bless you peace