Latest / Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler / Outsourcing the Human Experience with Zachary Quinto

Transcript

Outsourcing the Human Experience with Zachary Quinto · Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hi Catherine, Hi Chelsea, how are you.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: I feeling fresh as a daisy, I mean, and I'm
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: in a really really positive space.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: I had a positive mood.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I've been reading like a little chapter from Letting Go
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: every morning just to make sure I had my head
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: on straight, along with my meditation and my gratitude.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: And I mean that takes a long time.
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: Actually, every morning I have to like get ready, like
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: and it takes like an hour, but it's worth it
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: because it puts my head on straight. I had a
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: lot of crazy little things this weekend, and I just
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: chose not to let any of them deter me and
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: stay positive and vibrant and high. And I was there
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: was a man sitting next to me on a plane
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: and could have gone either way. It really could have
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: gone south, and I made sure that it did not
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: good And luckily I had a huge set of headphones
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: on me.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: Excellent, just tune everybody out, and just tune everybody out
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: and just keep the vibes high.
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: Oh, and then people were recommending me to read this
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: other book, Power Versus Force, which is really about physics
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: and quantum physics and which is really like I've never
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: read anything like that, and I'm into it because, yeah,
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: it kind of explains your energy field and why there
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: is energy coming off of everything, and like its relation
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: to kinesiology, you know how like if you're around something
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: that's not good for you, like say artificial sweeteners or something,
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: and they press your arm down on what, like, your
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: arm will have less strength than it. And I once
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: went to this spa in Salzburg, Switzerland, or maybe it
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: was ober Salzburg, I don't know, I don't know, somewhere
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: where Hitler came from. And I and they did a
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: lot of kinesiology testing there. They figure out what you're
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: allergic to, so they put like dander on your leg
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: and then then you do a strength test and if
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: you are strong, you're not allergic to dander, if you're
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: weak when it's on there, And it's pretty fascinating when
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: you see that because you like shows your allergies right away.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: But all that stuff is like so hard to measure,
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: so like it's scientific. Yet people are a little bit
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: resistant to that philosophy because they don't see it as
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: easily measured. But anyway, I also had a Celsius this morning,
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: so they are out of my little energy packets from Keani.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: They had me made these little natural guarana energy packets
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: because I don't drink coffee, so I would take those
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: every morning when i'd wake up, and they discontinued them. No,
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: so I had a Celsius on my way to Ben
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: Bruno this morning. No, you're really rocking, So now I'm
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: fucking out of my tree. Yeah, Indianapolis, Saint Louis, and
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: Kansas City this weekend. And if you haven't gotten your
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: tickets yet, I don't even even know what to say
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: to you.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: All right, should we introduce the guest? Yes, I'm so
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: excited to talk to him. I haven't seen him in years,
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: but I've seen him on TV. Now, please welcome Zachary Quinto.
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: Hi, Kutie, how are you?
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: I was so you know what, I was so excited.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: I don't really care when people actually come to my
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: house or not for podcast purposes, as long as I
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: don't really have to go far.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: But I was kind of looking.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: Forward to giving you a big hug with your masculine
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: with your big, hot, masculine body.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: I haven't seen you in so long.
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: A long time. I was thinking today as well, how
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: much I was looking forward to connecting with you. It's
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: nice to see you again.
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: You know what I did something so embarrassing, but of
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: course I know. I can tell you. I was at
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: this restaurant in Santa Mona and I saw Zachary Levi
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: and I was talking to him like it was you
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: until halfway through the real conversation he said, are you
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: seeing anyone now? And I don't remember what he said,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: but he intimated somehow. He was, you know, seeing a
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: woman and I was like a woman.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: He said, what are you?
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: What are you talking about? He said, what are you
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: talking about? And then I was like, this is not
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: who I think it is.
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: So it's like I have the condition that you have
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: on your show. Mind yeah, r pro subpagno show. That
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: sounds like a word I want to add to my
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: reports one.
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: It's a real well, it's a good out in situations
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: like that. I'm so sorry, exactly like I suffered from
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: pressy pagnosia. I thought you were someone else. That is
• 3:40
  Speaker 3: a good a good way to exit the awkward situation
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: if you have to.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: And what is it called? What is the layman term
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: for that?
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: Face blindness?
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: Face blindness which your character on your show brilliant minds,
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: which is fucking awesome. By the way, I just watched
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: three episodes. Wow, you had me working out for three
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: hours this morning.
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: Because I was like, he looks so amazing. I'll take
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: all the.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: Credit and that I'll play the next one.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: But that's a great show on Peacock that I didn't
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: know about and now I know about, and we need
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: to tell everybody that doesn't know about it how great
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: it is.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Because first of all, I love a procedural, don't you too.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Absolutely I love.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: And I love the premise, and I love a doctor
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: for good, taking chances, taking risks for the good of
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: everybody's because there's obviously a very metaphysical aspect to this pow.
• 4:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well, you know the it's based on a real
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: life person. I think that's always a good place to
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: start when we're talking about brilliant minds. It's based on
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: Oliver Sacks. Actually, this is right at my desk. I
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: didn't plant that, but he has a book coming out,
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: edited by Kate Edgar, who heads the Oliver Sacks Foundation.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: Oliver Sax was a prolific author as well as a
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: revolutionary neurologist in the mid twentieth century, and he wrote
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: dozens and dozens of books case studies about his patients
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: and the man in Musuki's way, his for a hat,
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: most notably Awakenings, many many music Ophelia, Anthropologists to Mars,
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: and tons of books that hero. He also wrote many
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: essays and gave many lectures and speeches. He was an
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: incredible man and he was driven by the pursuit of
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: understanding who his patients were before they were stricken with
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: whatever neurologic condition, disease, disorder, or injury befell them. And
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: he was always that was always his north star. The
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: engine of his purpose was to find their dignity and
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: their sense of personhood within whatever they were struggling with.
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: And it set him apart in a lot of ways,
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: and he really revolutionized the field of medicine and also
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: the field of literature. Right because medicine has become so diagnostic,
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: and technology and the advancements of technology for allowed medicine
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: to become so diagnostic, we lost the humanity of medicine.
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: And Oliver Sacks was somebody who was pretty singularly interested
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: in resurrecting the humanity of medicine. And so our show,
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: while I don't play all Over Sacks. I play a
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: character who is based on him. In every aspect of
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: the character that I play is drawn from the actual
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: life of all Over Sacks, but the character that I
• 6:11
  Speaker 3: play exists in a modern day's story, in a world
• 6:14
  Speaker 3: that's taking place right now.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: Getting this role must have really added to your own
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: kind of I want to say spirituality, but perhaps there's
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: a better word for it, consciousness. Consciousness, Yes, thank you,
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: there you go. Consciousness has it, Yes.
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: One hundred percent. It's really kind of been amazing for
• 6:33
  Speaker 3: me to zoom out and see how all of my
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: experiences have brought me to this place. Just the idea of, like,
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: where are our journeys take us right? And that at
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: this moment, particular moment that I'm playing this role in
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: this show and putting this message out into the world,
• 6:56
  Speaker 3: there are no mistakes, I find, and I do feel
• 6:59
  Speaker 3: like it is a an evolution of where I've been.
• 7:02
  Speaker 3: And I think Oliver Sacks and my intersection with him.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: I sadly never got to meet him while he was
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: still alive, but my intersection with him in this creative
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: way and in this profoundly meaningful way to me is
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: something very special and so Oliver Sacks was somebody who
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: was really designed to examine the last frontier of the
• 7:26
  Speaker 3: human experience, which is the brain, the mind, and consciousness.
• 7:29
  Speaker 3: And I know, Chelsea, you know we share this quest
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: in our own journeys in individual ways, like you and
• 7:36
  Speaker 3: I are both. I think one of the reasons why
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: I've always been so drawn to you is, you know,
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: we're very similar age and and we I think you're
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: just as you're You're curious in a similar way to me.
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: And what I've watched of you and read of you
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: and know of you, you know you and I kind
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: of will never stop digging. And all of our Sacks
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: was like that, right, So the excavation, the process of
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: excavation of who we are as human beings is something
• 8:04
  Speaker 3: that drove him and motivated him. And similarly, I think
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: it drives me and motivates me and you too. And
• 8:12
  Speaker 3: so it's no mistake that we're all talking about this
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: right now, and so in terms of consciousness and where
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: we are in consciousness right now, I think it is
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: a pivotal moment in our evolution as a civilization as
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: a species. And I think all of our Sacks is
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: as much a part of that conversation as you and
• 8:29
  Speaker 3: I are right now, it's sitting here in.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: The slash yeah, and including everybody.
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: Actually it's a world yeah, because I think we were
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: just talking about that book Letting Go. I don't know
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: if you've read that. Have you ever read that by
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: David Hawkins. It's a great book about consciousness.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: But it's just about you know, how leading with love, and.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Like love really is the answer to everything, Like you know,
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: stop resisting, stop fighting, stop arguing, stop being negative, stop
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: getting in negative patterns that you can't get out of,
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: but you can get out of them. It's never too
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: late to get out of your negativity. And like the
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: vibes bring the vibes up, you know what I mean.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: When you're around somebody and you leave them and you
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: feel better after having seen them, that's because they have
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: high vibes and then they are infecting you by osmosis
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: with their high vibes. And my goal and our goal
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: is a plant should obviously be like you know, so
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: much love could heal and hate doesn't bring us anything good.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: It just brings us more acrimony.
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: I'm so happy to hear you say this, And just
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: to piggyback on that. You know, we are living in
• 9:27
  Speaker 3: this moment right now. It is such an unprecedented time
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: what we're experiencing right now. The ground is shifting beneath
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: our feet as we're standing on it. So there's an
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: urgent need right now. The urgent need of the time
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: right now is for exactly what you're saying, is for
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: everybody who has even the faintest inkling of that sensibility
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: that you just articulated, to do whatever they can do
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: to tune their listening to that vibration and allow that
• 9:59
  Speaker 3: vibration to strengthen within them, and then allow that strengthening
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: the vibration within them to reverberate in other people that
• 10:08
  Speaker 3: will then continue to amplify that out and out and out.
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: And what we're witnessing right now, in my estimation, is
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: that collectively, we have decided to focus on the wrong
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: things and all of this attention. If you look at
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: how it's built and built and built, and it's really
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: building to this election, isn't it right? You look at
• 10:25
  Speaker 3: how it's built, and I'm not just talking about in
• 10:27
  Speaker 3: the United States, but just in terms of you know,
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: the broader spectrum, we have created these paradigms that are
• 10:34
  Speaker 3: based in the binary one way or the other, right
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: or wrong, black and white. I'm on this side, you're
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: on that side. When the reality is that those are
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: all reactions that are coming from a place of completely
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: justifiable and understandable fear. Fear. Fear fear has driven us
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: to this place of binary thinking and clinging to the
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: constructs that we have all agreed upon for generations are
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: going to be the foundation of how we relate to
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: one another, and how we see one another, and how
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: we sink of one another. But when we really zoom
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: out and consider what we are up against and what
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: we are now not about to, but what we are
• 11:20
  Speaker 3: now entering into moving forward, right, the existential crises that
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: present themselves to us, namely, and there are many, I
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: don't need to name them all, but namely climate change
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: and artificial intelligence. Let's just start there. Climate change, we're
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: already seeing. It's not something that's going to happen. We
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: don't have to argue about it. I don't want to
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: get into the semantics of the black and white of it.
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: Right North Carolina, Florida, in the last two weeks, we
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: have seen these unprecedented catastrophic, cataclysmic experiences. They're just the beginning,
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: but they are happening at an accelerated rate, they're happening
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: more frequently, and they're happening in more anomalous situations, like
• 11:59
  Speaker 3: in the mountains of North Carolina, where they shouldn't be happening. Right, So,
• 12:02
  Speaker 3: if we take this as the harbinger of what's to come,
• 12:06
  Speaker 3: we recognize that within the next ten to fifteen, certainly
• 12:11
  Speaker 3: twenty years, the kinds of mass migrations that we're going
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: to see on the planet. Right, the tens of millions
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: of people who are going to have to move from
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: place to place because the place that they're in now
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: are no longer inhabitable. That's one thing. And then you
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: just blow in underneath that artificial intelligence and machine learning.
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: We've already invited that into the conversation. We don't know
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: what it's capable of, we don't know how fast or
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: how dramatically it's going to evolve, but we've already brought
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: it into the conversation. So it's already here. People are
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: already using chat GPT to write their cover letters, and
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: you know, so it's already here. We're divesting ourselves of
• 12:47
  Speaker 3: the experience of being human. We're outsourcing the human experience
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: to this artificial intelligence, and we have no idea where
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: that's going to take us. So collectively we are on
• 12:57
  Speaker 3: the precipice of change. We can't either family because if
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: you add just those two variables, and there are many others,
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: but if you add just those two variables to the equation,
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: then we have no idea what the future looks like.
• 13:11
  Speaker 3: And so the constructs that we've agreed upon in the
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: past are rapidly dissolving. And my feeling is that consciousness
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: and the rapid expansion of consciousness is the only way
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: that we have any chance of moving forward with success,
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: to thrive, or to survive. Even so, for me, it
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: is exactly what you're saying, and I think people all
• 13:35
  Speaker 3: around the planet right now are feeling it and sensing it,
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: and even if they don't know what it is, they're
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: tapping into something bigger than themselves, because it's everywhere you look,
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: and it is our responsibility to amplify that and bring
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: people into the light, just like you're saying. So I'm
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: glad to hear you say it. I know I feel
• 13:55
  Speaker 3: like I've been talking about seventy some minutes about shutting up.
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: But I feel so strongly about it right now, and
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: it feels so urgent that we have to talk about it.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree with you. I feel the same way.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: I'm mentent on spreading infecting as many people with kindness
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: as I can.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: Do you meditate, yes, I do? Good.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: What kind of meditation do you do?
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: I do veading meditation, which is an offshoot of TM.
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: So it's the same technique as TM, it's just a
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: different community and it's a twice daily practice mantra based.
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: What about you.
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: I do a Choprah app mostly I do like a
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: guided meditation about twenty minutes each morning.
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: Right, So Chopra comes from the Vedic world. I mean
• 14:35
  Speaker 3: Deepak Chopra is that is the same. We are the
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: same in that practice. And I say to anybody who
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: has a meditation practice right now and especially for the
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: next three weeks before the election, meditation, meditation, meditation, it
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: is it is Defcon five, All hands on deck. If
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: you have a practice or you know people who have practices,
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: now is the time to come to your practice and
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: hold space, because not only do we have to hold
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: space for our own experiences, we have to be able
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: to hold space for the experience of the collective, because
• 15:10
  Speaker 3: this is a collective shift of consciousness that's happening right now.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: It's not an individual shift of consciousness. It is happening
• 15:16
  Speaker 3: on the individual level, on the micro level. But if
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: you zoom out and look at the macro level, you know,
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: just think about what we're fighting about right Think about
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: what we're fighting about. Think about the Middle East. I
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: care not wading into those waters in terms of the politics,
• 15:31
  Speaker 3: the history. I have no authority or knowledge to do so. However,
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: I will say that it is one of the binaries
• 15:38
  Speaker 3: that is the most kind of volatile binaries on the
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: planet right now. But if you zoom out, the reality
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: is that what we're fighting over is land that will
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: be uninhabitable in the next twenty five years by anybody,
• 15:50
  Speaker 3: so that the Palestinians and the Jews are going to
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: have to shoulder to shoulder walk together to find a
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: place where they all can live and survive. So we
• 15:59
  Speaker 3: are focusing on the hatred. We're focusing on We no
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: longer have the luxury to be defined by the constructs
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: that have defined us for the last hundreds of years,
• 16:11
  Speaker 3: and generations. You know, we just as a civilization no
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: longer have the luxury of being defined by whether we're
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: Jewish or Palestinian, or gay or straight, or CIS or trans,
• 16:21
  Speaker 3: or black or white. That conversation is over, and how
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: we recognize the end of that conversation and evolve that
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: conversation into what the new conversation has to be is
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: the moment that we're living through right now, and as
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: terrifying as it is, it is also profoundly full of
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: beauty and possibility and creativity and joy. And that is
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: our job to move in that direction and to move
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: toward that because we're not going to change anybody's minds.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: We're not going to change anybody. And the reality is
• 16:56
  Speaker 3: as well, that you know, the planet can sustain the
• 17:00
  Speaker 3: current trajectory of population that that that we're you know,
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: barraging it with. So the reality is that things are
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: going to shift cataclysmically and they already are. Look at
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: the wars, look at the natural disasters around the planet.
• 17:13
  Speaker 3: There's nothing we can do to stop that stuff. But
• 17:15
  Speaker 3: what we have to do is evolve adapt And you know,
• 17:20
  Speaker 3: that's what Oliver Sacks believed. That's why there's no mistake
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: that I happen to be, you know, playing this character
• 17:26
  Speaker 3: right now at this moment. Think about all the fucking dark, twisted,
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: fucked up characters I've played, so you know, and my
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: own journey from the dark into the light, and now
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: I get to play a role and tell stories and
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: put them into the world from a place of evolution
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: and adaptation and on my own personal journey, that's been true,
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: and I think creatively that's been true, and hopefully collectively
• 17:51
  Speaker 3: that will be true as well as we continue to
• 17:54
  Speaker 3: move forward.
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: This is like a sermon. Oh my god, I loved
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: it today, but I know, I mean, look at you.
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: I mean, I really couldn't have said it better myself.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 18:04
  Speaker 3: I'm glad to hear it. I'm sorry I went on
• 18:06
  Speaker 3: a rant, but I've just been thinking about it so much.
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: And also, there's no mistake that I'm doing fucking press
• 18:12
  Speaker 3: for the Igains. Swear right. It's you. I shouldn't be
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: in there, but you know that I'm doing press that
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: I have, that I have an opportunity to connect with
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: like minded people in this way. And I just knew
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: coming into this that you're probably on the same wavelength
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: because That's why I've always been drawn to you, even
• 18:29
  Speaker 3: before I met you or knew you, and I just
• 18:31
  Speaker 3: saw you as someone who is asking the questions, pushing
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: the boundaries, you know, not letting yourself off the look,
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: digging deeper. And that's what we need. We need to
• 18:42
  Speaker 3: reach out to one another and then bring the people
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: who are kind of aware of that sensibility, even if
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: they haven't completely accessed it themselves along for the journey.
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: That is a hat.
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: Because the true definition or the true meaning of consciousness
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: isn't just being conscious about what's happening in your life.
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: It's about having a collected consciousness with the entire world.
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: So every single person matters in the same way.
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: There aren't people who matter more or less at all.
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: And that's where yeah, and so there it does feel
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: like a tipping a point, especially if the election goes
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: the way that I want it to. I feel like
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: that we all want it to that are sitting here today,
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: I feel like, you know, then we really do have
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: an opportunity to change the world, because you know, climate
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: change is at the foot, it's out the door, it's happening.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: And what we need in response to that is not
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: more fighting. We need all hands on deck and love
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: to receive these people who are not no longer going
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: to have a safe place to live, to actually be
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: able to help and aid and send aid. You know,
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: there are so many things that we're going to have
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: to deal with. Can you imagine having additional wars and
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: then climate change?
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: And you know it's like, let's stop with the wars and.
• 19:54
  Speaker 3: Start with the love and water wars and that you know,
• 19:57
  Speaker 3: the wars the climate change is going to ignite. Right.
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: So the other thing that I think is important to
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: kind of bring into this conversation a little bit about
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: about evolution is that one essential element of evolution is destruction.
• 20:13
  Speaker 3: That's just a simple fact of nature. Creation, maintenance, destruction,
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: These three operating forces are always at play in nature.
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: And if we consider that as human beings, we are
• 20:24
  Speaker 3: individual expressions of nature. If we're if we're operating from
• 20:27
  Speaker 3: this place which is scientifically proven, that we are all
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: expressions of extensions of one unified field of consciousness. Right.
• 20:36
  Speaker 3: This is quantum physics. This is you know, what is
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: far beyond my level of intellectual capacity to understand, let
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: alone explain, But you know, quantum physics proves the idea
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: that all matter comes from one source, which is on
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: MENSS and then becomes MENSS. Then we all do come
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: from the same place, right, We are all connected in
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: ways that we don't even come hand or understand. And
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: yet we have lived in a world that for millennia
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: has really existed on this idea of individual identity, right,
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: personal egoic identity. And now we are confronted with profound
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: transformations that no longer allow us to hide behind those constructs. Right,
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: those constructs are dissolving, and now we have to accept
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: the fact that destruction in many forms is a part
• 21:29
  Speaker 3: of progress. And so the election, for example, I think
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: represents two very different paths. Are we going to move
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: forward with an administration who has some awareness of and
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: some understanding of the contexts as it is in a
• 21:45
  Speaker 3: larger sense, or are we going to move forward with
• 21:48
  Speaker 3: an administration who is completely limited in their ability to
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: see what's actually happening and focused on holding on to
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: the past, retire turning to something that never will be Well.
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: On that note, we're going to take a break and
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: we're going to be right back with Zachary Levi. Okay,
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: So for Zachary Quinto, for this portion of the show,
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: we take callers, and I know that you're excited to
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: give advice to some people. You're good at it and
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: it's real people, so it's exciting. I find it very
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: very what's the word. No, it's more than satisfying and
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: me feels meaningful.
• 22:30
  Speaker 5: There's connection there, which is just what we've been talking about.
• 22:33
  Speaker 5: Oh great, you know this shared consciousness, and now we'll
• 22:35
  Speaker 5: share some.
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: Conscience, share our consciousness, but we're going to infect some
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: more people.
• 22:39
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Well, our first question is just an email. This
• 22:42
  Speaker 5: comes from Amanda TLDR.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: I don't what does that mean?
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: What?
• 22:47
  Speaker 5: Oh it means too long? Didn't read, so it's like
• 22:49
  Speaker 5: a summary TLDR. I want to not give a shit
• 22:53
  Speaker 5: what other people in my workout bubble look like, so
• 22:55
  Speaker 5: I can stop comparing myself to them. As an athletic, healthy,
• 22:59
  Speaker 5: forty four year old woman who loves to stay active,
• 23:02
  Speaker 5: I've always tried to embrace a positive relationship with my body.
• 23:05
  Speaker 5: I'm not trying to look like a twenty something anymore.
• 23:08
  Speaker 5: I've always loved the gym, and during COVID I discovered
• 23:11
  Speaker 5: the Tracy Anderson method. I've completely fallen for it. I
• 23:15
  Speaker 5: practice five to six times a week and truly enjoy
• 23:17
  Speaker 5: the process, but constantly being bombarded by this and other
• 23:21
  Speaker 5: fitness marketing online can sometimes have a negative impact on
• 23:24
  Speaker 5: my self esteem. I often find myself feeling self deprecating
• 23:27
  Speaker 5: and critical of my body, especially when I compare myself
• 23:30
  Speaker 5: to the trainers and many women who post their workouts
• 23:33
  Speaker 5: with their perfect size two bodies and somehow have their
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: makeup and hair looking perfect to boot. I often will
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: record myself training, but then I see myself and I'm
• 23:42
  Speaker 5: mortified and won't post it. It's like a downward spiral.
• 23:45
  Speaker 5: I know I shouldn't let these comparisons affect me, especially
• 23:48
  Speaker 5: at my age, but I find it challenging to appreciate
• 23:50
  Speaker 5: my body and health when I'm bombarded with unrealistic standards.
• 23:54
  Speaker 5: It's gotten so much worse in my forties. I'm a
• 23:56
  Speaker 5: grown ass, smart, educated woman. Why do I let this
• 23:59
  Speaker 5: bother me? And how can I stop comparing myself to
• 24:02
  Speaker 5: picture perfect bodies? I just want to feel happier about
• 24:05
  Speaker 5: my own body. Warmly, Amanda, I don't know what do
• 24:08
  Speaker 5: you think.
• 24:09
  Speaker 3: You're very You're very active. I've seen you many a
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: mountain side.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: Yes, I would say on the subject of letting go.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: Let it go.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: If looking at other videos and fitness videos or people
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: in your class posting or looking at them while you're
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: working out, if those things bother you.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: Focus on yourself. Just focus on yourself.
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: Everybody has these feelings that you're talking about, but it's
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: up to you to like cut the cord of comparison.
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: Like that's why I don't spend five hours a day
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: online looking at people's Instagram.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: That's because it's bad for you. It's bad to compare.
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: What is it.
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: Comparison is the beef of joy. Comparison is the thief
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: of joy. That's the latest quote that's been going around
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: that I heard, and it is so true. It is
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: that is not your body. That is not your problem.
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: You're here problem and you can either make yourself victorious
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: or you could make yourself a problem.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: So the fact I would say that you're working out five.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: To six times a day doing I've done that workout before,
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: that's not easy. You should be celebratory of the fact
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: that you are doing the best that you can do
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: and stop comparing yourself to other people.
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: That is a losing scenario.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: So write something down on your fridge or your mirror
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: or wherever you look at the most and say, comparison
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: is the thief of joy.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: Write that down. That's all you need to know, and
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: imprint it on your mind.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: And you know, once you read something enough times, you
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: don't need to see it every single day. You remember
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: when you wake up, you know, and then it becomes
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: part of who you are, because yeah, I just don't
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: think there's any You don't get any benefit from depleting
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: yourself of the pride that you have earned from going
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: and working out to make yourself feel better every single day?
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: Why are you letting anyone take that away from you?
• 25:57
  Speaker 3: And I would also only just say that you know
• 26:00
  Speaker 3: this difference between where are you looking for your sense
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: of self? Where are you looking for your sense of
• 26:07
  Speaker 3: validation and purpose and meaning in the world? Are you
• 26:10
  Speaker 3: looking outside of yourself for that? So you're looking to
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: import that feeling from people's reactions to you, like oh
• 26:17
  Speaker 3: my god, you look so good, or you know you
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: lost so much weight, or you look so skinny, so
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: then you feel better about yourself. Well, that's importing that
• 26:23
  Speaker 3: feeling from somewhere else, as opposed to allowing the discipline,
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: the commitment, the endorphins, the progress that you're making in
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: your own life to be the source of your fulfillment,
• 26:36
  Speaker 3: which you can then radiate and export out to the world.
• 26:39
  Speaker 3: So this difference between importing a sense of validation and
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: exporting a sense of validation. When you're importing a sense
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: of validation, you need to keep looking for it. You
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: need to keep looking for it from other people. You
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: need to keep looking for it from you know, is
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: it comparison, is it I'm successful, i am in love,
• 26:57
  Speaker 3: I'm whatever. So you're looking for it somewhere else, and
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: then it's unsustainable. But if you're able to gift that
• 27:04
  Speaker 3: focus and recognize that what you're doing by committing to
• 27:08
  Speaker 3: your own well being, committing as a forty four year
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: old woman, I think she said to, you know, embracing
• 27:13
  Speaker 3: life and staying active and keeping your body engaged, that's
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: more than ninety five percent of the people on the
• 27:19
  Speaker 3: planet are doing. So shift your focus to recognize how
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: wonderful that is, what a generous thing you're doing for
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: yourself right, and then you can, hopefully, you know, focus
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: that energy on yourself and then cultivate a place from
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: which that gratitude and that pride, that well deserved self
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: directed pride can then be something that other people see
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: in you and recognize as something that inspires them. Then
• 27:46
  Speaker 3: you're magnetizing people into your experience who are drawn to
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: you because you have generated this light that brings them in,
• 27:53
  Speaker 3: not because you're looking for other people to shine their
• 27:56
  Speaker 3: lead on you to make you feel better.
• 27:58
  Speaker 5: Right, it doesn't matter how bang your body is, if
• 28:00
  Speaker 5: your vibration is low.
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Or it doesn't matter how better of your body is,
• 28:03
  Speaker 3: if all you care about is that other people see
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: that or feel that way.
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: See, yeah, exactly exactly. But I love what you just
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: said because it's you know you can. You can attract
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: people on so many different levels and in so many
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: different ways. You're focusing on the wrong thing. Like infuse
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: yourself with the positivity that you derive from working out
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: and just let that be and I promise you you're
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: going to have a different outlook.
• 28:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah, this might be a great place to to incorporate.
• 28:30
  Speaker 5: Chelsea recommends a lot of gratitude journal and do that
• 28:33
  Speaker 5: for thirty days, like just focusing on like here's what
• 28:36
  Speaker 5: my body can do, Here's what I was able to
• 28:38
  Speaker 5: do yesterday, Here's how strong I feel today and really
• 28:41
  Speaker 5: focusing on that for thirty days.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: And you know what, also, I just talked to someone
• 28:46
  Speaker 2: about this and it was somebody who was very unexpectedly
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: wrote a gratitude journal that I was like, really, he
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: must have been a straight man. But anyway, he was
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: saying to me that he did do it, not at
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: my behest, but that someone else is a mind. And
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: he said, I mean it's vibrationally, like how you can
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: change your attitude, how you can change your outlook, like
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: it's a matter of days if you just put that
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: down to practice, like all these little things you can
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: do to keep the vibes high.
• 29:13
  Speaker 5: Zachary Levi wasn't.
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: I mean, most things are Zachary Levi with me.
• 29:18
  Speaker 5: So thanks, Amanda, and let us know if that changes
• 29:21
  Speaker 5: things for you. Our next question comes from Brian and
• 29:24
  Speaker 5: he's going to be calling in is it Zachary Levi?
• 29:28
  Speaker 3: And he identified he does.
• 29:30
  Speaker 5: So Brian says, Dear Chelsea, I've recently started dating a
• 29:34
  Speaker 5: new guy and he's absolutely wonderful. He's got a great job,
• 29:37
  Speaker 5: he's super sweet and has a good support system around
• 29:40
  Speaker 5: him and texts in full complete sentences. I know, Chelsea
• 29:44
  Speaker 5: will appreciate that one.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: I do appreciate that.
• 29:46
  Speaker 5: There's just one caveat. He's undetectable untransmittable HIV positive, meaning
• 29:52
  Speaker 5: his viral load is so low that he's not able
• 29:54
  Speaker 5: to pass it along, or so the science says. I have, however,
• 29:57
  Speaker 5: heard of cases where this has still occurred. I'm also
• 30:00
  Speaker 5: on PREP, so that's another layer of protection. And obviously
• 30:03
  Speaker 5: condoms can be used as well, although I'm allergic to
• 30:05
  Speaker 5: late text and haven't used condoms in yours. I really
• 30:08
  Speaker 5: like this guy, and we're at the point of exploring
• 30:10
  Speaker 5: things physically. I just have some worries with this, as
• 30:12
  Speaker 5: it's a huge potential risk. I feel it's a risk
• 30:15
  Speaker 5: I'm willing to take in the right situation for sure.
• 30:17
  Speaker 5: I just don't know when that time is. Sincerely, Brian, Hi, Brian, Brian, Hi.
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: Hi.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: This is our special guest, Zachary Quinto today.
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: Hi, nice to meet you. Say Kinto or Quinto, You're right,
• 30:31
  Speaker 3: You're right? Shows this Quinto Pinto?
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: Okay, Sorry, sorry he's telling you he's a fan. I'm like,
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: is it Quinto?
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: Please?
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: Quick here like an asshole? Sorry, anyway, welcome to our show.
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: I'm glad you're both here. That's a great question. Have
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: you spoken to your doctor about this?
• 30:44
  Speaker 6: That was my first question too, not specifically about this situation,
• 30:48
  Speaker 6: about you know, protection and to begin with, I think
• 30:51
  Speaker 6: that's why I started PREP about a year and a
• 30:53
  Speaker 6: half ago, so I've had kind of the general over
• 30:56
  Speaker 6: overlying conversation, but not specifically about this situation yet.
• 31:00
  Speaker 3: I mean, I would I agree with Chelsea. I think
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: that is certainly the place to start. To sit down
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: with your doctor and explain the situation and come up
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: with a plan that your doctor feels is reliable, you know,
• 31:13
  Speaker 3: medically sound and reliable. But I mean, the evolution of
• 31:18
  Speaker 3: medical technology is so incredible and you know, our generation
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: is benefited from that SOT greatly. So you know, between PREP,
• 31:27
  Speaker 3: which you're on, and his treatment which keeps him undetectable,
• 31:31
  Speaker 3: I mean, the percentage chance of transmission is like point something, right,
• 31:35
  Speaker 3: like point zero something. I think it's really really low.
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: And so how long have you been together?
• 31:42
  Speaker 4: Not long, I'd say about a month.
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: Uh oh okay, but it's a little.
• 31:47
  Speaker 7: Bit long distance. So we've been on probably like six
• 31:49
  Speaker 7: or seven days. I'm supposed to see him tonight actually, so.
• 31:51
  Speaker 3: Oh wow, exciting and how openly are you able to
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: talk about it with him?
• 31:57
  Speaker 4: Communication has been really great.
• 31:59
  Speaker 7: He was very you know, forth coming from the beginning
• 32:01
  Speaker 7: and you know, give a lot of information on answered
• 32:03
  Speaker 7: any and all questions.
• 32:04
  Speaker 4: So that was good. I think it's just for me.
• 32:08
  Speaker 7: The big question is do I want to and even
• 32:11
  Speaker 7: though the risk is super super low, do you want
• 32:13
  Speaker 7: to take that risk if it's not something that's going
• 32:15
  Speaker 7: to work out. Yeah, And so that's the question that
• 32:18
  Speaker 7: I think I have for him. But I just I
• 32:20
  Speaker 7: don't know exactly how to phrase that and come across
• 32:23
  Speaker 7: obviously endearing with compassion.
• 32:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I would just say you're from my
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: experience communication, communication, communication, you know, share your feelings, because
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: if if your relationship is meant to evolve into something
• 32:37
  Speaker 3: substantive and meaningful and sustainable, then communication is the only
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: foundation on which you can build a relationship for which
• 32:45
  Speaker 3: that will be true. So you have to be able
• 32:48
  Speaker 3: to bring all the parts of yourself, the scared parts,
• 32:50
  Speaker 3: the vulnerable parts, the parts that you feel like might
• 32:53
  Speaker 3: get rejected to the conversation from the beginning, because if
• 32:56
  Speaker 3: what you're navigating is, hey, is there youeeling this way
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: that I'm feeling like this could be something significant and
• 33:04
  Speaker 3: he is feeling that way, then the conversation will lead
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: you to the next phase or the next chapter. Right,
• 33:10
  Speaker 3: But I don't think you can make it all about
• 33:14
  Speaker 3: this one issue. I think what you need to do
• 33:16
  Speaker 3: is figure out a way to maybe separate out that
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: concern with the bigger question, which is like, hey, are
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: we doing this thing? Because if you're doing this thing
• 33:26
  Speaker 3: and you're together, then as long as you have a
• 33:30
  Speaker 3: foundation who open this honesty and communication, there's nothing else
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: you can't figure out.
• 33:34
  Speaker 4: Oh, absolutely, And I really appreciate that.
• 33:36
  Speaker 7: I speaking of making it about the whole conversation, there's
• 33:40
  Speaker 7: been an update since I wrote in and since I
• 33:42
  Speaker 7: talked to Catherine last week.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: Oh, yes, you're pregnant.
• 33:46
  Speaker 7: But again, it's been moving forward, and so it's been
• 33:49
  Speaker 7: moving in the right direction of all that. However, on Thursday,
• 33:52
  Speaker 7: I was with him and he told me that he's
• 33:55
  Speaker 7: kind of unhappy at his place of work right now,
• 33:58
  Speaker 7: but there's one boss that's kind of kept in there
• 34:01
  Speaker 7: that he's very very close with, and he got worried
• 34:03
  Speaker 7: that that boss is potentially leaving for a job out
• 34:06
  Speaker 7: of state, and they've asked him to go if it
• 34:09
  Speaker 7: all works out, so he has some big decisions to
• 34:13
  Speaker 7: make with that. It wouldn't happen for like four to
• 34:15
  Speaker 7: six months even if it did happen. So that's kind
• 34:18
  Speaker 7: of a new wrinkle that's been thrown in.
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: Well, where would he go because it's already long distance,
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: so where would he move?
• 34:24
  Speaker 7: Well, long distance Now, it's only about forty five minutes
• 34:26
  Speaker 7: to an hour, so it's not bad. It's definitely cable
• 34:28
  Speaker 7: to see each other a couple times a week at least,
• 34:30
  Speaker 7: but this would be five hours away.
• 34:33
  Speaker 2: Uh huh okay, Well that's so manageable. I mean, listen,
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: that's a gift sometimes to distance.
• 34:38
  Speaker 4: It is.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: I mean, every relationship that I know that's successful is
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: because the two people are traveling extensively. So please don't
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: use that as like our reason to not be with someone.
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: It's very good to have space and to have someone
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: five hours away.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: It is no big deal. That's an hour flight, or
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: do you mean a five hour flight?
• 34:59
  Speaker 7: It's a five hours but it's in the middle of nowhere,
• 35:01
  Speaker 7: so there is no direct.
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: Flight or well you could parachute in.
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: Don't worry about that, right, Yeah, I wouldn't worry about
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: those problems until they arise and they're actually concrete, and
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't consider it a problem, you know what I mean,
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: Just kind of like reframe everything you're talking about. The
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: fact that you guys had this conversation a month in
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: means that this guy is responsible, is respectful, and actually
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: cares about you, right, I mean, he told you everything
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: he needed to tell you before anything happened.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: The risk sounds very low.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: Obviously, I'm not going to give you any medical advice
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: because I'm not a doctor, even though I want to be,
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: and I love medications and pills and I love giving advice.
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: But I don't want to be responsible for that.
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: But I just as a gut I think, I think
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: you're going to be fine, and I understand all of
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: the concerns you have. But we are living at a
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: time that is much different than when AIDS came on
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: the scene, you know what I mean. This is a
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: much different world. People live with it healthfully for decades,
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: you know, look at Magic Johnson.
• 35:58
  Speaker 4: Look.
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: And it's not just wealthy people. I have friends who
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: have AIDS or HIV. Well. So yeah, not that you're
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: trying to get it, but I'm just saying it's just
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: not what it was. So I want you to think
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: about it in that in that frame too, because it's
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: really important to find somebody that you can trust, that
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: you can love, that respects you and the feeling is mutual.
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: So I would focus on those issues first and anything
• 36:19
  Speaker 2: else you can navigate.
• 36:22
  Speaker 4: I appreciate that.
• 36:22
  Speaker 7: Yeah, And he says so sweet, and it's been such
• 36:24
  Speaker 7: a breath or fresh air, and it's definitely something that
• 36:26
  Speaker 7: I want to explore.
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: So I really really appreciate all.
• 36:29
  Speaker 3: The Yeah, you should explore it, see where it takes you.
• 36:32
  Speaker 3: It sounds like a nice beginning to something that even
• 36:35
  Speaker 3: though there's a lot of unknowns, you can't miss what's
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: meant for you. So if this is something that is
• 36:41
  Speaker 3: supposed to be in your life, then everything will unfold
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: so that that is possible.
• 36:47
  Speaker 4: Right now. That's that's really really great advice. I appreciate it.
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: Okay, Well, thank you, Brian.
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: You in a month, I'll be at one of your
• 36:54
  Speaker 4: shows in Texas.
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: Oh go Texas. You're in Texas, well, try to get
• 36:58
  Speaker 2: out of there as quickly as are you there?
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: All right, thank y'all, all right, thanks for calling in.
• 37:05
  Speaker 5: All right, Our next caller is Chris. He says, Dear Chelsea,
• 37:11
  Speaker 5: I recently got engaged to my partner after eighteen years.
• 37:14
  Speaker 5: Marriage was never a must, and it just felt like
• 37:16
  Speaker 5: the right time for us. But our relationship is not
• 37:19
  Speaker 5: what my email is about. So when we got engaged,
• 37:22
  Speaker 5: I called to tell my mom the news and got
• 37:24
  Speaker 5: a less than excited response. To be honest, it was
• 37:27
  Speaker 5: exactly the response I expected, so it wasn't a disappointment. However,
• 37:31
  Speaker 5: before she even said her lackluster congratulations, the first thing
• 37:34
  Speaker 5: she said was, we won't tell your father. This is
• 37:37
  Speaker 5: where I need advice. I've never been particularly close to
• 37:40
  Speaker 5: my dad, and when I came out, it made a
• 37:43
  Speaker 5: not great relationship pretty bad for a few years. I
• 37:46
  Speaker 5: didn't come around for a while. While things have improved,
• 37:49
  Speaker 5: my being gay and in a relationship is just never
• 37:51
  Speaker 5: discussed or talked about. My dad is ninety five years old,
• 37:54
  Speaker 5: I'm forty, and my mom says he won't be able
• 37:57
  Speaker 5: to handle the news of my engagement, almost implying it
• 38:00
  Speaker 5: would kill him.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: Literally. I don't feel.
• 38:02
  Speaker 5: Right not telling my dad, and I don't need his
• 38:04
  Speaker 5: approval and I'm not looking for him to all of
• 38:06
  Speaker 5: a sudden embrace my relationship. But I'm also not going
• 38:08
  Speaker 5: to hide my future marriage. How do I handle this?
• 38:11
  Speaker 3: Yes?
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: Hi, how are you nice to meet you? This is Agricanco,
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: our special guest today.
• 38:16
  Speaker 3: How are you nice to meet you? How are you good?
• 38:18
  Speaker 8: Good?
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: Here comes Doug. This is my big black magic Doug.
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: Here you goes? Okay.
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: Hi.
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: So congratulations, by the way.
• 38:27
  Speaker 3: So your engagement, that's exciting.
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: That's exciting with your partner eighteen years Okay.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: Fantastic, it was time cool geez. Eighteen years and you're forty.
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: Ye, so you're twenty two years twenty two years old
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: and you're still together college.
• 38:46
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: Is he the same age as you are?
• 38:49
  Speaker 8: Oh he's a bit older. He's in his sixties.
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: Oh interesting. Okay. So does your mother know him already?
• 38:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 38:57
  Speaker 8: My mom does.
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay.
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: Is she venting you from telling your father or suggesting
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: that you not tell your father because of who it is,
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: or because of just the fact that you're gay.
• 39:07
  Speaker 8: Just the fact that I'm gay? I mean, he knows.
• 39:09
  Speaker 9: He's never met my partner, Jeff for a while once.
• 39:12
  Speaker 9: He when I first came out. You know, I sort
• 39:16
  Speaker 9: of stayed away from the family for several years. Slowly
• 39:20
  Speaker 9: I sort of got back in with the family and
• 39:23
  Speaker 9: you know, went back to doing some family events. Jeff
• 39:27
  Speaker 9: has never met my dad. It's just never not something
• 39:31
  Speaker 9: that's talked about. It's just I'm around just to help
• 39:35
  Speaker 9: keep the peace. Almost sometimes it seems.
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry that that's been your experience. That's pretty disappointing.
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sorry too. That is difficult and challenging and
• 39:44
  Speaker 3: I'm sure probably a heavy thing to carry in the
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: face of such a celebratory moment. So I'm sorry that
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: you're at that crossroads.
• 39:53
  Speaker 5: And Chris, I wanted to just drop in here as well.
• 39:56
  Speaker 5: Something that came up when we were chatting in our
• 39:58
  Speaker 5: pre interview, was that, really you said that your dad
• 40:01
  Speaker 5: has sort of softened. He's been saying I love you more, hugging.
• 40:04
  Speaker 5: Can you tell us a little bit about that.
• 40:06
  Speaker 9: Yeah, he's ninety five, so he's getting up there in age,
• 40:09
  Speaker 9: so you know, part of it's just like as he
• 40:11
  Speaker 9: just set in his ways, you know, but just over
• 40:14
  Speaker 9: the years, you know, whenever I see him and whenever
• 40:17
  Speaker 9: you know, me and my siblings when we leave for
• 40:19
  Speaker 9: whatever gathering we're at, you know, he's definitely more affectionate. Recently,
• 40:24
  Speaker 9: you know, he's saying, I love you, giving a kiss.
• 40:26
  Speaker 3: You know it interestingly to me, it's an interesting I
• 40:30
  Speaker 3: guess most things tie back to consciousness. But but you know,
• 40:33
  Speaker 3: you have to give him grace, you know. And I
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: guess my advice to you, or my sort of reflection
• 40:40
  Speaker 3: back at you, is, if you've observed a softening him,
• 40:44
  Speaker 3: you know, and you've observed this kind of desire to
• 40:47
  Speaker 3: connect more, I think you have to recognize what you're
• 40:51
  Speaker 3: up against, right, And for somebody who's ninety five years old,
• 40:54
  Speaker 3: that's that's not getting up there, that's that's got He's
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: already got there, you know what I mean. That's that's
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: really really no matter how you cut it, he's coming
• 41:02
  Speaker 3: to the end of this part of his experience. And
• 41:04
  Speaker 3: so you know, if you feel like sharing this news
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: with him is going to cause him any kind of
• 41:13
  Speaker 3: pain or exacerbate his suffering or complicate the end of
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: his life, then, as his son, even though you clearly
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: had a complicated relationship with him, I'm sure that's not
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: your motivation here. You don't want to make his life
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: any harder. So maybe there's a way to just find
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: an intimate moment with him and just say something to
• 41:34
  Speaker 3: the effect of, Dad, you know, I know that we've
• 41:37
  Speaker 3: never really seen eye to eye on certain aspects of
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: who I am. And I understand that you know that
• 41:44
  Speaker 3: that doesn't mean you love me any less, but it
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: just means that you weren't able to process the reality
• 41:49
  Speaker 3: of who I am in the same way. But I
• 41:52
  Speaker 3: just want you to know that I am really, really happy.
• 41:57
  Speaker 3: You know, like, if there's a way for you to
• 41:58
  Speaker 3: communicate to him that this moment in your life where
• 42:03
  Speaker 3: you're telling him without telling him, if your mom is
• 42:05
  Speaker 3: concerned that you telling him that you're getting married to
• 42:07
  Speaker 3: your longtime partner who's never met because he couldn't hold
• 42:10
  Speaker 3: space for you to have that experience, is going to
• 42:13
  Speaker 3: make his suffering worse, then is there an opportunity for
• 42:18
  Speaker 3: you to just tell him what you need him to know,
• 42:22
  Speaker 3: which is that he raised a son who is capable
• 42:25
  Speaker 3: of love and who is capable of navigating all of
• 42:28
  Speaker 3: the challenges and all the obstacles that your father, in
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: his limited consciousness, forced upon you, not intentionally and not
• 42:37
  Speaker 3: because he wanted to, but because he didn't know any better.
• 42:41
  Speaker 3: And now that he's coming to the end of his
• 42:42
  Speaker 3: journey with compassion and forgiveness. I think there's a way
• 42:46
  Speaker 3: for you to let him know that you don't resent
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: him for that, and that he can move on from
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: this experience, from his human experience, and know that you
• 42:56
  Speaker 3: are happy and safe. And any father wants to know
• 42:59
  Speaker 3: that their child.
• 43:01
  Speaker 8: Yeah, and I believe he does.
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: So that's very beautiful. That is very beautiful, and exactly
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: I completely agree. I think there is a way to
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: say that. And you know, and I think you're probably
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: going to hear what you want to hear when his
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: time is up. And if you have the luxury of
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: spending you know, a last few days with him, even
• 43:20
  Speaker 2: if it's the last few hours with him, hopefully he
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: you know, you'll have that opportunity. And I guarantee you, well,
• 43:27
  Speaker 2: I don't guarantee you, but I would strongly suspect that
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: during that time you're going to have an opportunity to
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: share this with him. There is really no rush, right Like,
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: it's not an emergency. You don't have to tell him,
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: right and you know in those moments or when you
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: if there is a moment that happens before that, great,
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: but if you know, if it's not until then, then
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: that's it. A good opportunity too, and when you're saying goodbye,
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: to let him know how happy you are and how
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: happy you are to live a fully realized, actualized existence
• 43:56
  Speaker 2: where you're not hiding, you know, and you're being who
• 43:59
  Speaker 2: you are.
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: And there's not a person who doesn't want that for
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: their child.
• 44:03
  Speaker 5: Right, And that you've found a partner who loves you
• 44:05
  Speaker 5: and treats you well, and that you've made a life
• 44:07
  Speaker 5: together and.
• 44:08
  Speaker 3: You've been together for eighteen years. So this isn't a lark,
• 44:12
  Speaker 3: I know.
• 44:13
  Speaker 2: I just I'm just so curious how you get how
• 44:15
  Speaker 2: you get engaged after eighteen years, Like what happens?
• 44:19
  Speaker 9: I just you know, I've been thinking about the last
• 44:22
  Speaker 9: year or two.
• 44:23
  Speaker 8: Just you know, I just felt it was time we
• 44:26
  Speaker 8: took it.
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: We're in Pittsburgh, Oh you are, that's where from?
• 44:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 44:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I know a lazy well I know my fair
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: share about you know, stubborn, Dunian, older Pittsburgh. So I
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: know what you're up against there, and like I get it.
• 44:42
  Speaker 3: You know, that's a tough metocrack. So so just like
• 44:46
  Speaker 3: I just think compassion and forgiveness can be your guide
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: and that you know you'll find a place with him
• 44:51
  Speaker 3: of mutuality and love, because that's that's that's what's there,
• 44:55
  Speaker 3: you know, eventually.
• 44:57
  Speaker 8: Definitely, Yeah, Yeah, I think it'll I'm hoping it would
• 45:01
  Speaker 8: go better than what my mind is thinking it will go.
• 45:04
  Speaker 3: So yeah, and I do agree with Chelsea there is
• 45:07
  Speaker 3: no rush.
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just know that you're gonna You're gonna have
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: the conversation with him at the appropriate time and surrender it.
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: Just be like, Okay, I've decided what I'm going to
• 45:15
  Speaker 2: do here, Now let me let it go, and then
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: when the opportunity arises, take that opportunity.
• 45:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 45:21
  Speaker 9: I think the more I think about it, it's more
• 45:24
  Speaker 9: for me than it really is for him.
• 45:27
  Speaker 8: I think too. No, I mean, he knows, but he
• 45:30
  Speaker 8: doesn't know the extent of it.
• 45:31
  Speaker 3: Maybe it's hard in families when you have open secrets,
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: you know, it's a difficult thing to navigate because it's
• 45:36
  Speaker 3: such a oh, it's such an unfortunate byproduct of trauma, right,
• 45:41
  Speaker 3: like open secrets, Like that's the worst.
• 45:43
  Speaker 4: Right.
• 45:43
  Speaker 3: So he knows, but he doesn't know, or he knows
• 45:45
  Speaker 3: but he won't acknowledge it or something. So yeah, And
• 45:49
  Speaker 3: I also recognize as a gay man myself, I also
• 45:51
  Speaker 3: recognize your position, which is like, I shouldn't have to hide,
• 45:55
  Speaker 3: I shouldn't have to sublimate my love to please this person.
• 45:59
  Speaker 3: But there is that you know, he did the best
• 46:02
  Speaker 3: he could and it wasn't good enough, and I'm sorry
• 46:06
  Speaker 3: that it wasn't good enough for you. You you deserve better.
• 46:10
  Speaker 3: But it sounds like you've found better. It sounds like
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: you've created better for yourself. You've evolved beyond the limitations
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: of what he provided for you or your you know,
• 46:19
  Speaker 3: your family of origin provided for you, and so now
• 46:22
  Speaker 3: you have the opportunity to, from that place of expansion,
• 46:27
  Speaker 3: embrace his limited point of view and let him know
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: that it doesn't diminish your appreciation for him. Your love
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: for him and the person that you are today is
• 46:40
  Speaker 3: informed at least partially and certainly significantly by him, and
• 46:45
  Speaker 3: so there is gratitude there. And how can you focus
• 46:48
  Speaker 3: on that now that he's in the very you know,
• 46:50
  Speaker 3: the last chapter of his experience.
• 46:52
  Speaker 9: No, I agree, I agree, So I would definitely be
• 46:55
  Speaker 9: having this conversation and for the best.
• 46:58
  Speaker 2: And also framing everything in the right pace way, like
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: you know, what you said is important. This is more
• 47:03
  Speaker 2: for me than for him, So take that back and
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: think about that, because if it is more for you,
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: then hold on to it for a little bit.
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: Okay, and thanks for calling it. Yeah, thanks, great to
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: meet you.
• 47:12
  Speaker 3: I have a good one.
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: Thanks Chris, Bye bye. Okay, do we have to take
• 47:17
  Speaker 1: a break and come back to wrap it up?
• 47:18
  Speaker 2: Okay, We're going to take a break and come back,
• 47:24
  Speaker 2: and we're back with Zachary Quintop.
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: Zachary, I have a question about your show.
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: So your character is gay in the show, and Oliver
• 47:31
  Speaker 2: Sacks was he?
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: He wasn't gay?
• 47:32
  Speaker 3: Was he? Yeah? He was?
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: Oh?
• 47:34
  Speaker 3: He was? Oh?
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay, So then I guess I don't know if it
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: was also So that was a request that you made.
• 47:40
  Speaker 3: No, No, Oliver Sacks was a gay man who was
• 47:43
  Speaker 3: celibate for thirty five years of his life, and that
• 47:47
  Speaker 3: was a real roadblock for me in terms of understanding
• 47:51
  Speaker 3: the character. I couldn't fathom when I first was presented
• 47:55
  Speaker 3: with that fact how someone could make a choice like that,
• 47:57
  Speaker 3: or why someone make a choice like that. And then
• 47:59
  Speaker 3: the more I did it, the more I realized that
• 48:02
  Speaker 3: he recognized that if he came out in his day
• 48:06
  Speaker 3: and age, and you know, he lived and worked in
• 48:08
  Speaker 3: the middle of the twentieth century, mostly the seventies, eighties
• 48:11
  Speaker 3: and nine dais and he died in twenty fifteen at
• 48:12
  Speaker 3: the age of eighty three. So, you know, had he
• 48:15
  Speaker 3: come out, he would have been defined by that aspect
• 48:18
  Speaker 3: of who he was, right, he would have been diminished
• 48:21
  Speaker 3: in his capacity to make the contributions to the field
• 48:25
  Speaker 3: of neurology that he was singularly designed to make. And
• 48:28
  Speaker 3: so he chose to separate himself, to divorce himself from
• 48:32
  Speaker 3: that part of who he was, and to compartmentalize and
• 48:36
  Speaker 3: split off from that part of his identity in order
• 48:39
  Speaker 3: to be able to serve his patients and make the
• 48:42
  Speaker 3: incredible and indelible mark on a medicine that he was
• 48:46
  Speaker 3: able to make. Thankfully, late in his life he came
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: to terms with his sexuality and he came out, and
• 48:52
  Speaker 3: he was in a relationship for the last decade or
• 48:54
  Speaker 3: so of his life with a very loving partner, and
• 48:57
  Speaker 3: he found his way to that. But you know, so
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: my character on the show is gay. It's the first
• 49:03
  Speaker 3: openly gay lead of a primetime network medical drama, A
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: big deal in that way. But it's a big deal
• 49:10
  Speaker 3: because it's not a big deal, right, It's a big deal,
• 49:13
  Speaker 3: because we live in a world, and I live in
• 49:14
  Speaker 3: a world as an openly gay actor where that aspect
• 49:17
  Speaker 3: of my personality, of my identity is only one of
• 49:21
  Speaker 3: many aspects of the identity that I moved through the
• 49:24
  Speaker 3: world with, and I benefited from the sacrifices of people
• 49:30
  Speaker 3: like Oliver Sacks who didn't have that same opportunity. So
• 49:35
  Speaker 3: there is some really wonderful through line in that narrative
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: right between the life that Oliver Sacks lived, the life
• 49:42
  Speaker 3: that the character I play, Oliver Wolf lives, and the
• 49:45
  Speaker 3: life that I live, you know, as an actor and
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: as a person in this modern day. So I feel
• 49:51
  Speaker 3: grateful for that.
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: Was there ever a time in your career that you
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: weren't out?
• 49:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I didn't come out until twenty eleven.
• 49:59
  Speaker 3: I started working. I mean, Heroes was the show that
• 50:02
  Speaker 3: really changed my life my career. People started to know
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: me in two thousand and six. So it was the
• 50:09
  Speaker 3: end of two thousand and six that I became a
• 50:13
  Speaker 3: known quantity, right like that, I ever had to deal
• 50:16
  Speaker 3: with the idea of what being famous was. And then
• 50:19
  Speaker 3: it was five years later that I came around public.
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: So there was a five year period of time where
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: I was out in my life and people who knew
• 50:25
  Speaker 3: me knew I was gay, but I never spoke of
• 50:27
  Speaker 3: it publicly until twenty eleven.
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: And how did that feel?
• 50:31
  Speaker 3: Well, that was one of the most liberating experiences that
• 50:34
  Speaker 3: I've ever had. I made the decision to come out
• 50:37
  Speaker 3: on my own. I didn't tell anybody. I didn't tell
• 50:39
  Speaker 3: my publicists. I didn't tell my agents or my manager,
• 50:41
  Speaker 3: anybody that I worked with. I didn't tell anybody in
• 50:42
  Speaker 3: my life, my boyfriend at the time, my family. I
• 50:45
  Speaker 3: just gave an interview and I referred to myself as
• 50:48
  Speaker 3: a gay man twice within the interview, so that I
• 50:51
  Speaker 3: put you a fine point on it in case they
• 50:52
  Speaker 3: missed it the first time. And that to me was
• 50:56
  Speaker 3: I did it in my own time, on my own terms.
• 50:58
  Speaker 3: I didn't seek advice or councilor you know. It wasn't
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: a decision by committee. It was a decision that I
• 51:04
  Speaker 3: made myself, and so I was able to hold that
• 51:09
  Speaker 3: decision for whatever it ended up, you know, whatever the
• 51:12
  Speaker 3: reaction to it was, it was my decision, you know,
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: And so that felt really liberating.
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. I love that. Well, thank you
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: for being with us today.
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: You guys, everybody, you can watch this wonderful human being
• 51:24
  Speaker 2: on his show on Peacock on the Peacock Network. I
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: think they want you to call it the Peacock.
• 51:29
  Speaker 3: I don't. It's on NBC on Monday nights at ten
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: pm for people who watch TV in real time, and
• 51:34
  Speaker 3: then it streams on Peacock on the Peacock the next.
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: Day, probably way off.
• 51:39
  Speaker 3: I think it might just be I'm.
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: Getting confused with all the different platforms and their names.
• 51:48
  Speaker 3: Is It's very good. It will be something different tomorrow.
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: And I hope I get to see you in person
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: sometime soon, Zachary.
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: I was just about to say that very thing. It
• 51:57
  Speaker 3: is always good to connect with you. You know, I really
• 51:59
  Speaker 3: admire you, respect you and appreciate you and like you,
• 52:03
  Speaker 3: and I hope we can have a meal and you know,
• 52:05
  Speaker 3: like see each other outside of this context at some point.
• 52:07
  Speaker 3: I'm in New York. I'm doing a play here this
• 52:10
  Speaker 3: fall from the end of November until February. If you're
• 52:13
  Speaker 3: in New York, please come to see my play called
• 52:15
  Speaker 3: Culton Love at the Helen Hayes Theater on Broadway. And
• 52:18
  Speaker 3: if you come, let me know and we can go
• 52:20
  Speaker 3: it after.
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'm going to write that down right now. Cult
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: of Love.
• 52:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, come see it. It's really I'm really excited.
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: I would love to be good. Okay, Okay, it was
• 52:28
  Speaker 1: such a pleasure to see.
• 52:29
  Speaker 3: So good to see you both. Have a good day YouTube.
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much.
• 52:33
  Speaker 3: You well. Thanks.
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: Okay, So upcoming shows that I have you guys, I'm
• 52:38
  Speaker 2: coming to Texas. I'm coming to Saint Louis and Kansas City,
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: and then I will be in Las Vegas performing at
• 52:44
  Speaker 2: the Chelsea Theater inside the Cosmopolitan Hotel.
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: I'm coming to.
• 52:47
  Speaker 2: Brooklyn, New York at the King's Theater on November eighth,
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: and I have tickets on sale throughout the end of
• 52:55
  Speaker 2: the year in December, So if you're in a city
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: like Philadelphia or Bethlehem or San Diego or New Orleans
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: or Omaha, check Chelseahandler dot com for tickets.
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 53:07
  Speaker 5: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email
• 53:09
  Speaker 5: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be
• 53:12
  Speaker 5: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited
• 53:15
  Speaker 5: and engineered by Brad Dickert executive producer Catherine Law and
• 53:19
  Speaker 5: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot
• 53:21
  Speaker 5: com