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Hair on Her Own Terms: DIY Styling & Showing Up in Busy Seasons · The Tight Curls Project

0:00
"I'm trying to survive and still feel cute." That's it.
0:05
Yeah.
0:05
It's, it's amazing how bold people can be concerning Black women's hair
0:09
Yes.
0:10
And that's when I got to crochet.
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I was good for a good little two, three weeks.
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So I did that for a whole year, because I was like, "I literally don't have time
0:26
Welcome to the Tight Curls Project podcast.
0:28
I'm Shadia, and today I'm joined by a special guest, Ariane Washington.
0:33
Ariane is the founder and CEO of AriReady Consulting, a dynamic
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financial consulting firm dedicated to empowering service-based startups.
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And she's on today because this is amazing.
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She's built this company and she's a CEO and doing great
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things, and she does it in style.
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Ari, I'm so excited to have you here today.
0:52
Thanks for having me
0:54
I was so excited when you said yes to Be on the podcast because I've seen
0:57
you at work and just how you move and all the different styles, and I
1:02
thought, you know, this is someone who I think the audience would really enjoy
1:05
hearing, and you have such a great experience and background, but What's
1:09
really impressive is that this is DIY.
1:11
You're doing it yourself, and it would be great to hear how you got there,
1:15
what your story is for learning how to do these styles, and also what
1:19
motivates you to try new things, because sometimes it can be a little scary.
1:23
So Ari, thank you so much for joining us.
1:25
Thank you so much for having me.
1:27
This is great.
1:27
I'm excited
1:28
yeah.
1:29
So we like to start here on the podcast just understanding a little bit about
1:33
your experience with hair growing up.
1:35
Like, what are your early memories?
1:37
How did you get your hair done when you were a kid, little Ari?
1:41
Yeah.
1:41
So hair is a big deal in my family.
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So much so that every house we lived in, there was some type of room
1:49
that we turned into a mini salon.
1:51
Oh, okay
1:52
and that's because I had a sister, um, and a mom, and my dad would cut his
1:58
own hair and do his own hair as well.
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So everybody was doing their own hair.
2:02
So hair's a big deal, and I think that's when I really got fully, fully into that.
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That and that, that I had to go to church every Sunday, and I lived
2:11
in a cold area where protective styles were everyday lifestyle, so
2:15
Okay.
2:16
And what kind of styles were you wearing as a kid?
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As a kid, mostly braids because I wasn't allowed to get a relaxer
2:24
until I was like 13, 14 years old.
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So mostly braids and beads ching-a-ling-a-ling everywhere.
2:32
Yes.
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Little clickety-clackety.
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Clickety-clackety, and I would get my hair done every two weeks.
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My mom would wash and condition and blow-dry my hair, and then she would take
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me, uh, to my fellow kitchen beautician friend, m- a friend of my mom's.
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And, um, I would sit in her kitchen.
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She had a daycare in her house, and she also had, like, seven children, so there
3:00
was something going on all the time.
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It was pure entertainment, better than TV.
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And I would sit in her kitchen for, like, probably, maybe…
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It was probably only, like, two hours, but it felt so much longer.
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And I would get a different hairstyle every single time, and I never knew
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what my hair was gonna turn out to be.
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I didn't have any preferences.
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I just knew I had to go and get my hair braided by Miss Brenda.
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So
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Wow.
3:25
So she would pick the style or would you have any input?
3:28
Oh,
3:29
I didn't have any input.
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It wasn't until I got a little older where I was like, "Yeah, can we do this?"
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But I think I only did that one time.
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There was only one time I was upset with how my hair looked, and that was because
3:41
I think she was pressed for time and she braided my hair in a complete beehive.
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You know the, the protective style you put under when you
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Oh no, just like, oh no
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she braided it in circles and had one braid in the middle of my hair
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She did you wrong
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and put beads at the end of it.
4:04
No.
4:04
Did you keep it in for school?
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I, no, I was so mad.
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I was like, "I don't want my hair like this, no."
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And, uh, my mom was like, "It's fine." I went home and took it right out,
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and I think I just asked my mom to put some pigtails on my hair or something.
4:18
Yeah
4:18
Yeah, that's, that's a brutal… She was at pressed for time.
4:21
No, no, definitely not.
4:23
It's a good, you know, braid down for a, a weave, but not for
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Not
4:28
out in those childhood streets.
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the hair, not, not for show.
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So yeah.
4:33
Well, that's amazing that you had someone close by and you could
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do that and had that ritual.
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So then you said around 13, you did get a relaxer, and then were you,
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going to the same person or were you going to a salon or doing it at home
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I had to graduate.
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So, I went to a licensed,, cosmetologist at her salon.
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Back then it was, like, blow dry and the flat iron and the little curls.
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So it was a heavy… Now that I'm, like, older, it was a heavy heat thing.
5:03
but yeah, that was a, you know, completely different experience.
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And because growing up, I think starting at, like, fifth grade, I went to schools
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that were predominantly Caucasian, so with that I kinda felt like, okay, now
5:19
I kinda look like the other girls' hair,
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you know?
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So that was, that was a whole thing.
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Um, and my hair was actually super long because it was
5:27
in braids for like 12 years.
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So my hair was, you know, past bra length at 13.
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Wow.
5:35
You showed up to school that day with a little flip.
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Yeah, they were like, "Oh my gosh, Ari, your hair." Yeah, I have hair, you know.
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So that was cool.
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Yeah, I got it.
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It's here, it was here the whole time, guys
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the whole time, you know?
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Just in its natural state.
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So
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So it sounds like you were paying more attention, you're seeing people around
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you, and that impacted, you know, what you thought you'd wanna wear and try.
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Do you remember, , as you progressed, was there another big time where you felt
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like you had a different understanding of your hair or wanted to try something else?
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Yeah, when I was older., Because at that, at that point, I think this is
6:13
back in the day when people used to get relaxers every six to eight weeks.
6:16
Oh, yeah, yeah.
6:17
That was me.
6:18
That was me.
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It was you?
6:19
Yeah.
6:19
So you get it, right?
6:21
So that was like the normal cadence in getting a relaxer.
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And when I, I think I was, how old was I?
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Like 23.
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I had a bad relaxer experience for the first time.
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I have very, very thick hair, so my hair can take the creamy crack,
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is what they called it, you know.
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Um, but I think the relaxer I had, they had new ownership.
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They changed the formula, didn't notify anybody.
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So my hair became very, very dry and brittle, and I cut it off.
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And my hairdresser in LA, she said, "You know how to do your hair, so
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just get a relaxer once a quarter.
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And I was like, "Okay, once a quarter, okay, I can do that," you know?
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now it's like once every six months, but…
7:06
Oh, interesting
7:08
Yeah.
7:08
But that was really, that made, that really changed my look on taking care
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of my hair and understanding I didn't have to get a relaxer to look good.
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For me it was about getting something done really quick 'cause
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I've always been a person who had like two, three jobs growing up.
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Plus I was involved in school and in my local church.
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So I liked having a relaxer because I could just put it in a
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ponytail if it wasn't done, 'cause my hair was long enough to do it.
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Mm-hmm.
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But when you get older and you're like, "My hair is not what, it's not what it
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was. What's going on?" and you start to learn more about protective styles,
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'cause I didn't know anything and didn't really take it into consideration.
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Um, but now it's like that's part of my lifestyle, protective styles.
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So that was really a game changer for me.
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That made me change my outlook on my hair.
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You said something that your stylist told you you knew how to do your hair.
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So what did she know about you that made her say that?
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I didn't go to her a lot, when you sit in a chair, it's kinda like therapy
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when you go to your, your hairstylist.
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And so I'd be like, "Yeah, I did my hair like this and that." So I would
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show her pictures, and she was like, "You really know how to do your hair."
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I was like, "Yeah, you know, I'm trying to be fabulous on a budget."
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So,
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Exactly.
8:24
So how did you learn?
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What was-- were the ways that you figured out how to do your hair?
8:30
Yeah.
8:30
So YouTube University, I would… And even to this day, like if I feel
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bored or I feel like there's some type of like challenge I'm facing
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with my hair, I'll go to YouTube and see what, what women are doing.
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. So I would just look at different, um, YouTubers, speed up the,
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speed up the video if I need to.
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Um, there's a couple people I follow like religiously, uh, 'cause
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they're always doing something new.
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But yeah, just YouTube.
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I'm a really hands-on person, and I am not afraid to take risk.
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So when it comes to my hair, nothing else.
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But when it comes to my hair,
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Says the CPA.
9:08
as a CPA, I'm, I'm pretty conservative, but when it comes to
9:10
like my hair or a new adventure, I'm, I'm, I'm really open to that.
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So I'll be like, "Yeah, let's try it." Um, and I always believe that if something
9:20
happened to my hair, it's gonna grow back.
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And I, and I don't, I never saw myself as like, I, I am not my
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hair, as India Arie would say.
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I'm not my hair.
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So I had, I've had really, really short hair.
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I've had, you know, different braids and, you know, anything.
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If there was a mistake, we'll cut it off.
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It will grow back.
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And you know, I know some women, they don't even like to get a trim at all,
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and I'm like, "It'll grow back." and I think that was 'cause I always felt I
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was beautiful no matter what I was doing.
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So if I had to show up in a Halle Berry cut or a pixie cut, I'm ready for it.
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And that's amazing because I do think it's easy to get in the trap of feeling
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my hair needs to look a certain way to be beautiful, and we have so many places
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where that's reinforced and Eurocentric standards, and even now, you know,
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sometimes in the Black community we can be hard on people who are doing big
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things and we feel like their hair is not done or it's not in a certain style.
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So I th- I think that's interesting 'cause that does give you a confidence
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if you believe I'm beautiful, you know, whatever I have, you can try more things.
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And I think perhaps that also made you more willing to do DIY.
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Yeah
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I think that's great that you tried it out, and do you think that came from
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the fact that your mom did her hair or do you think you just decided to
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give it a try 'cause of time, money?
10:46
Yeah, I think it was time.
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My parents put me in a lot of activities.
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I played piano, classical piano for eight years.
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Like I,
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Oh waouh
10:55
Yeah, I was
10:55
said, yeah, you did a lot.
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, My life was just always like, "Uh, uh," back to back.
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And
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. then of course, I had homework, and I was expected to keep straight A's
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Because of that, that and also like a lot of stuff was at church and and, and
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My parents, , they're beautiful to me.
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They're very fabulous.
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I grew up with them, and every time I see them, I'm like, "Gosh," you know?
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"Y'all look good." With that being said, it was like the standard was you're,
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you know, you need to look right.
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Yeah
11:22
my parents were straight shooters.
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They didn't beat around the bush.
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They didn't sugarcoat anything.
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I grew up with tough skin and They'll say, "That's a mess. But what are you doing?
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Put something else on." So I had to learn how to look nice and do it very quickly
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'cause we got somewhere to go, you know?
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So I think that changed me and established the standard of your hair
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needs to be done, and we don't have all day, so you know, low maintenance
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but, nice looking at the same time
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Okay.
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And I think you told me a little bit about your time in LA and trying lots of styles,
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can you share a little bit about that?
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Yeah.
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So with LA, I started to get into crochet styles, and it came out of necessity.
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I was studying for my CPA exam, and my schedule was packed.
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So I used to get up at 4:00 AM, and I'd drive to my job.
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too?
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Oh my
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I'm working full time and I was a manager.
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I managed five people, and I had, like, 12 companies, um, under my responsibility.
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The owner of the company, she knew I was studying for the CPA exam, and
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she also really favored me, and she gave me keys to the building so I
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could study because the LA traffic so it's not super far, but if you're in
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traffic, it takes, like, an hour plus
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Oh,
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way, one way,
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so I used to wake up at 4:00.
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I would get to the office at 5:00 AM.
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I would study from 5:00 AM to 9:00 AM, and then I would work from 9:00 AM to 7:00 PM,
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and then I would get back on the freeway at 7:00 PM and, and go to bed by 8:30.
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So that was Monday through Friday.
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So the hair, it don't, it don't got time.
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We don't got time.
13:07
We don't got time.
13:07
Um, yeah.
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And so, and then on the…
13:09
No, no time.
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I'm tired just hearing that.
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Yeah.
13:15
9:00 to 7:00?
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Yeah.
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So I did that for a whole year, and, that's when I started to get into crochet
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because I was like, "I literally don't have time to even comb my hair." Like, it
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was so… I was so time, time poor at the time, so I was… So, 'cause my mother had
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started doing it, and she was like, "Oh, I
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Oh.
13:36
tell you about crochet."
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And I'm like, "Okay." And she did my hair one time in a hotel
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because they were out of town and I was like, "Okay, that was pretty
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quick." And I was like, "Look at me.
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I look like I have a full sew-in."
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And that's when I got to crochet.
13:50
Um, yeah, I would do it on a Saturday.
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It would take six hours 'cause I have to wash and braid my hair and put it in.
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But I was good for a good little two, three weeks.
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Didn't have to do anything but take that bonnet off and shake my hair.
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So that
14:05
so I, I had my hair in crochet for a whole year.
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I didn't go to a
14:08
Wow
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I did not go to a salon for a whole year while I was studying for the CPA exam.
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So
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and you're focused and you found a way.
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And even hearing that, if you were to get braids, it would take you
14:20
six hours just to get the braids.
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Now let alone you know, washing, blow drying it, getting to
14:24
the salon and doing that.
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So that it was saving you time.
14:28
That's really, that's really impressive and it shows just your dedication to get
14:32
it get done and you found a way to, hack the system and still look good doing it.
14:37
Yeah, 'cause I still had to see clients and, uh, you know, this
14:40
is pre-pandemic, so I'm going on site and I'm going to these clients
14:45
and presenting financials and,
14:47
You need to look together.
14:49
exactly, I can't say, "Hey, I'm studying for the CPA exam, so excuse
14:52
my hair." Like, that's not an excuse.
14:54
Yeah.
14:55
Whoo
14:55
So I'm grateful that my Black hair is so universal and so flexible
15:03
to do whatever I choose, so
15:06
That's amazing.
15:06
I'm gonna pull up some pictures.
15:08
Maybe you can tell us a little bit about some of those styles,
15:11
' oh, yes.
15:13
That, that is a burgundy crochet bob that I cut into a bob
15:19
Oh.
15:19
way.
15:21
That was when, I really wanna have, like, a good cranberry hair, um,
15:26
color all the time, but I won't dye my hair because it's already relaxed,
15:32
and it'd probably not be good for it.
15:34
So yeah, that was just me trying some red hair in a bob.
15:38
that was inspired by Rihanna, who had a curly red bob one day, and I
15:42
was like, "Let me try something like
15:44
I like it.
15:45
It looks very, you look very LA.
15:47
I, I think it's also interesting because cutting the crochet hair after it's
15:52
installed I think is so important, but I don't know that everybody does that.
15:57
And even looking online for some stylists, it'll say no cutting.
16:01
So I-- yeah, I've seen that.
16:04
Or they'll just trim a ragged piece on the end.
16:06
Yeah, and so many times I always go home and shape it significantly.
16:11
But I like this style because this is probably, it started, um, a lot longer I'm
16:15
Oh yeah, for sure.
16:16
Started off a lot longer.
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I think I did a beehive install and made sure the curls that I put the
16:26
crochet thing in, like they were falling in front of my face, and then
16:29
cut around and, and shaped my face and, and cut it and cut it, you know.
16:34
This is great 'cause it kinda looks like bangs.
16:37
Yeah.
16:37
It was like, it was like a bang, bang.
16:38
Bang.
16:39
I really want crochet.
16:40
That's what I wanna get next.
16:42
So another picture from this time
16:44
That was around my birthday.
16:46
Somebody gifted me, human hair 'cause I really actually don't do sew-ins
16:50
that much, um, because again, I'm a CPA, and tracks are expensive.
16:58
Like weave tracks are very expensive.
17:00
That's why I love crochet 'cause it's much cheaper.
17:03
Um, but someone gifted me some tracks for my birthday.
17:07
She had a hair company, and she, and she wanted to give me
17:09
some custom color tracks for my
17:12
is amazing.
17:13
Yeah
17:14
And so I, I was like, "Okay, I'll pay to get it installed
17:16
since someone paid for the hair."
17:18
And so this is like a, just for people who are listening, this is
17:21
kind of a, what'd you say it was a honey blonde or was it red- reddish?
17:24
Yeah, it was like a honey blonde.
17:26
My hair is leave out in the front, but it's not colored.
17:29
So my hair is, it has blonde streaks in it naturally, um,
17:33
at lucky you.
17:34
Lucky you
17:35
Yeah, that's why my son's hair is so blonde.
17:38
Um, but so for me, that's why I've never had it colored 'cause all
17:42
the stylists are like, "No," you
17:44
Don't, yeah.
17:45
or something."
17:46
I think you have another picture where you, have your hair… Yes,
17:50
Yeah, that's leave out there.
17:51
That's my hair.
17:52
Yep, that's my hair in the front.
17:54
and that was a half part wig at the bottom.
17:58
So I think it started here, and then I had-- I just did, a whirl wand curl of
18:05
my hair and then just blended it through.
18:08
But that whole front part, that's my hair.
18:09
Yeah.
18:10
It looks so nice.
18:11
And what do you,
18:12
that was a cheap synthetic half
18:14
Oh, really?
18:15
Yeah, that was
18:15
were you trying wigs too at this time, or you, you k- kinda
18:20
Yeah,
18:20
to crochet?
18:21
I didn't try like a full wig, but I would do, uh, a U-part or half wig.
18:27
OK。
18:28
Usually if I did a half part wig, like my hair would cover the wig.
18:32
I had cut my hair and it was starting to grow back and I,
18:35
and I wanted to capitalize off the fact that it was shorter.
18:39
That's great.
18:40
And then Is this another crochet style with
18:42
Yes, that's another crochet style.
18:44
I wish I could find that hair again.
18:47
It was really good.
18:48
I don't remember who's the maker or anything like that, but that was just
18:53
some hair I grabbed at the store.
18:55
That was again during my, CPA study time, and that was just a hair that
18:59
worked out really, really well for me.
19:01
And that was when I started getting more into , the softer crochet hair,
19:03
which is a different type of install.
19:06
Oh,
19:07
still crochet, but like the way you knot it and stuff is different.
19:10
, The softer hair looks more natural, but it's a little more,
19:13
work when you're installing it.
19:14
Just, just
19:15
'Cause it doesn't knot as easily
19:17
Yeah, it doesn't knot as easy, so you have to do like a three, three loop.
19:21
And then, um, depending on how soft it is, you might have to
19:24
do a secure knot on each strand.
19:27
This is advanced.
19:33
I'm gonna ask you some more questions later about people who wanna get started
19:36
on the DIY, so maybe this is just note, this is more of an advanced style, guys.
19:40
But it looks so, it looks, it looks very natural and I like the shape.
19:45
Do you normally have a leave out or not
19:47
No.
19:48
that, that, I mean, that was just my roots.
19:51
'Cause my root-- you see my roots are a little blonde there.
19:53
But that
19:53
Oh, okay.
19:54
the bottom of my braid.
19:56
But it was no leave out there.
19:58
And I haven't done any leave out with crochet.
20:00
You haven't?
20:00
Okay
20:01
only with the track, like we- human hair tracks
20:04
Oh, this one.
20:06
Yes.
20:07
bold red.
20:08
This is more like a, I don't know, how would you describe this, this color?
20:11
It's brighter than burgundy, I
20:13
Yeah, it's like a purple burgundy.
20:15
Um, it was just some hair I found, and I had never used that hair before, so I was
20:20
like, "Let me just try it." I will say, it took a little while, but, - my friend
20:27
who's from Detroit, where, like, people do amazing hair there, if you didn't know.
20:32
Detroit's like very fabulous with the, with the hair and the makeup.
20:35
she was like, "Oh yeah, I like this." So that was a huge compliment.
20:38
Mm.
20:39
This was a more extensive time with installing it, but I just
20:44
really wanted red hair so bad
20:47
.. and LA is much more accepting as far as like the professional field.
20:51
I wanna come back to that.
20:52
But I think this is the last picture we have from this time frame.
20:55
Look at these golden braids.
20:57
Yeah, braids.
20:58
I went and got these done, at a African braiding shop.
21:01
I think I had two people doing my hair, and they did all
21:05
the blending and everything.
21:06
I mean, they were doing their thing.
21:08
I didn't know how to do box braids yet with, extensions.
21:11
So I went and got that done 'cause I think I was getting tired of crochet
21:14
or something, and I was like, "I just need my hair braided." And it was hot.
21:17
It was getting hot
21:17
Yeah, I think the, the size of these, 'cause they're very small box braids, and
21:22
the color blending is just chef's kiss.
21:25
I, I think today that's more popular where people are blending, but I, I'm guessing
21:30
at the time that wasn't really the case, at least out here in, on the East Coast
21:35
Yeah.
21:36
for non-celebrities.
21:37
yeah, they, they did their thing.
21:39
They did their thing.
21:39
Those are great pictures, and I just wanted to touch on something
21:42
that you said about the workplace and what has your experience been?
21:46
You're a CPA, you've been working in very corporate settings.
21:50
, tell us a little bit about your experience trying new hairstyles or
21:52
just showing up as you in the workplace.
21:56
Yeah.
21:56
It has been a journey for sure.
22:00
So just, you know, being an accountant and being a CPA, because for the most
22:07
part it is mostly male-dominated field.
22:11
not a lot of minorities in, accounting, especially CPAs.
22:16
So with that, for me, my hair was a topic, I think almost every week,
22:22
No
22:23
know, it was ve- uh, my hair was a topic almost every week.
22:26
With that, it was just a constant conversation, like how, you know, "What
22:30
is your hair looking like now?" Now for, for Black people it wasn't a big deal.
22:35
But when you're in these spaces when you are the only Black person in the room,
22:39
or the only other Black person in the room is not even fully identifying with
22:43
their Black hair and k- trying to act like it's not there, it was a conversation.
22:48
So in LA at the firm I was at, it was a huge conversation.
22:53
My manager talked about it a lot.
22:56
Really?
22:57
Yes, a whole lot.
22:59
And I'm grateful that I have parents who, you know, were straight shooters.
23:06
So if someone had a comment to say about my hair, I, I had something
23:11
to say back, let's just say.
23:13
You know, so it wa- it wasn't a big deal for me.
23:15
It didn't affect me emotionally and I was used to it, but it was
23:19
a topic of conversation always.
23:22
I mean, even to the point where sometimes it would be confrontational like,
23:24
"I don't get you." Like, I remember someone telling me, "I don't get you.
23:28
Like one day you have these braids in your hair, and then the next
23:32
day you come in with this type of hair that looks like Diana Ross.
23:37
Like, what's the deal with you?" And I'm like, "I like to
23:42
you met many Black women?
23:43
You change it up
23:44
Exactly.
23:45
But again, this person was a white male.
23:48
He was my manager for a couple years,
23:50
Oh, no.
23:50
Oh, that was your manager.
23:52
Really?
23:52
That was my manager.
23:53
That's tough.
23:54
Yeah.
23:56
. I don't know where that comes from.
23:57
It's not our place to try to figure out what goes on in people's minds,
24:01
but it's the curiosity and it feels sometimes like a frustration and it can
24:06
feel like, are you trying to limit me?
24:07
Do you not understand?
24:08
And that feels magical and you don't like that.
24:11
I think it could be multiple things.
24:13
But that is very, that's very, that's annoying.
24:16
But it sounds like you handled it well
24:19
Yeah.
24:20
Yeah.
24:20
I, it was… The thing about, I think it, I think it was them trying to limit
24:25
me in a way, and because I just boldly showed up the way I'm meant to show up.
24:33
You know, I'm, I'm going to stand in who I am and who I've been created to be.
24:37
And so with that being said, I did not allow them to limit me.
24:43
You know, sometimes it would be a little emotional because they would
24:46
give me more work to see what… Yeah.
24:49
It would just, it would, it was a whole thing, I think.
24:52
And so my hair was a access point for them.
24:55
So
24:56
Very
24:57
to say, I've overcome,
24:59
You have, and you did, and you kept on doing your hair the way you wanted to.
25:03
You could've just conformed and said, "I'm gonna do this one style,"
25:06
n- nobody notice me, you know?
25:08
But I do think that shows your resilience and your persevering
25:11
'cause you're already doing that CPA.
25:12
You didn't need this.
25:14
Exactly.
25:15
You didn't need this.
25:16
Let me be.
25:17
I knew what I was doing too.
25:19
Like, come on.
25:21
I think they didn't want me to leave.
25:22
I think they saw I was growing, and I think they wanted t- they wanted
25:25
me to just stay there however long 'cause I was doing… I was, I was
25:30
Making them look good, and I think they knew it was inevitable
25:33
that I was gonna leave on
25:35
And that could be thr-- that, that's threatening, right?
25:37
And seeing you show up as your authentic self and not be
25:40
bothered and still succeeding.
25:42
They're gonna find the difference they can talk about, right?
25:45
Which they shouldn't be talking
25:46
the difference they can talk about.
25:49
Mm.
25:50
I like that.
25:51
They shouldn't, that shouldn't be something they talk about, but they could.
25:53
I have had some experiences with that, with the people touching my hair.
25:57
"Hey, can I touch your hair?" "No." And they still touch my hair.
26:01
And it was, it was an acquaintance at work, but still, I just said no, and I
26:05
really wanted to go back when Solange's song came out and blast it for her.
26:09
Yeah
26:10
And then someone else told me, 'cause I did a different style, I mean,
26:13
these are, this is some form of a twist out, but I did one, and I was
26:18
on a conference call and my coworker said, "Oh, yeah. So is that your
26:22
real hair?" And I wasn't prepared for that, and I think I was thrown.
26:29
I said "Yeah," or something like this.
26:31
But then I decided I just need to be prepared in these situations
26:34
for, to have something back to say
26:38
Uh-huh.
26:38
, Sometimes you have to do that.
26:39
And I'm sure you've developed different things or variations on things you said
26:43
in that environment when it came up
26:46
Yeah, that's happened to me too.
26:48
sometimes it, sometimes it just catches you off guard
26:50
Yeah, they're like, "Is that your hair? Is that human hair? Is that-"
26:55
Look at you Googling the terms so you can try to interrogate me.
26:58
Right.
26:59
Right.
27:00
So I get that.
27:01
Yeah.
27:01
It's, it's amazing how bold people can be concerning Black women's hair
27:06
Yes.
27:07
Yeah.
27:08
Amazing
27:09
so did that shape your, philosophy or thoughts about hair in your career?
27:13
yes.
27:14
So I don't think I'm gonna really do red hair that much anymore, I know.
27:19
I'm, I… If I do it, it will be from a place of high accomplishment.
27:27
So I've had my business as a side business for five years or six years, and then
27:32
the past year I went full-time into my business, full-time entrepreneurship.
27:36
Wow.
27:37
for me… Thank you.
27:38
So for me, it's a, it's a matter of when it comes to my hair, I know
27:43
some things are not going to land properly in professional settings.
27:47
They're fun, 'cause Black, Black women can do a lot with their hair.
27:51
But for me, because of the settings that I'm in, I already know I'm
27:55
already pushing the limit a little bit.
27:57
Even though to anyone else it might not seem like a big deal, but when you're the
28:00
only woman in the room, the only Black person in the room, it's already a lot.
28:06
So with that being said, it's like, okay, I won't do too much color.
28:10
You'll catch me in like something that's close to my hair color, which
28:13
is like a couple blonde streaks.
28:15
Um- I like it … but I don't think I'll do too many like straight
28:20
red or straight blonde quite yet.
28:23
Maybe in like 5 to 10 years where I'm in a place where I don't care at all.
28:29
You know?
28:30
yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:31
You're building, you're building right now, you
28:33
I'm building.
28:33
But right now I'm very… I'm still cognizant of that.
28:35
I'm gonna still wear my braids, but I am very clear on what's
28:41
acceptable and what's not acceptable.
28:43
But then also I wanna be me.
28:45
I wanna look nice.
28:46
I'm a feminine woman, i'm fully into having my hair done and having my
28:50
nails done and, and I do it both
28:52
Yeah, that's impressive.
28:54
So what do you do now for your hair?
28:55
Are you doing a lot of crochets?
28:57
Are you switching between different types of styles?
29:00
So I have a two-year-old son right now, and I have no time to do my hair again.
29:07
I have no time to do my hair again, so it's back to crochet.
29:11
Good old crochet.
29:13
Uh, yeah.
29:15
Old friend, getting it done.
29:17
So I'll do some braids.
29:19
I'll do some crochet.
29:21
Honestly, since I've had my son, my relaxers have been,
29:24
like, once every six months.
29:26
Oh, interesting.
29:27
Okay.
29:28
And so tell us a little bit about that because some people maybe have
29:32
never had a relaxer or they're s- also used to the six, eight-week paradigm.
29:37
How does that work for you?
29:38
So the once every six months works for me because I have
29:42
my hair in protective styles.
29:44
My hair is very, very thick.
29:47
Some people can wear just, you know, do a twist out with their
29:50
natural hair and it be fine.
29:53
My hair will go revert right back within a couple hours.
29:56
So it's very, very thick.
29:58
It's very, very strong, which is why I've been able to have a relaxer so long.
30:01
I think if my hair had a looser curl, I definitely would wear it out.
30:06
I probably wouldn't even have a relaxer at all.
30:08
But for me I'm in a place where I have to.
30:11
So I think people don't realize also when it comes to protective
30:15
styles, this isn't like, "Oh, I'm just trying to grow my hair."
30:18
It's like, "I'm trying to survive and still feel cute." That's it.
30:27
I'm trying to be a good mom and, and, look in my mirror and say, "You know, you
30:31
still got it." and it's, you know, taking care of yourself makes you feel good.
30:34
I don't wanna feel depressed 'cause my hair is not done, you
30:38
No, I hear you.
30:40
I think also sometimes the narrative is Oh, I gotta, you know, bury myself
30:44
away in this protective style, like thug it out till I can then emerge a
30:48
beautiful butterfly , you know, with more hair." But I think what you're
30:52
saying is it's about the time and you don't-- you can still enjoy it
30:55
and do things in a protective style,
30:57
And you can work out.
30:58
'Cause I
30:59
work out.
31:00
Yes.
31:01
yeah,
31:03
That's really great.
31:04
And then I think something also is you're a new mom and you're a new entrepreneur.
31:08
So what came first?
31:10
How did that happen?
31:11
Yeah, the mommyhood came first.
31:13
So I actually did not plan to go into full-time entrepreneurship with
31:18
Ari Ready Consulting until maybe like maybe four more years from now.
31:23
Oh,
31:23
So yeah, th-this wasn't part of my plan.
31:26
But I really didn't know how hard motherhood is.
31:28
It's hard.
31:30
And I'm in a place now where I just wanna be present to whatever I'm doing.
31:35
I am… I'm not in my 20s anymore where it's like grind, grind, grind, multitask,
31:41
multitask all the time for the sake of it.
31:44
I'm like,
31:44
You did it
31:46
Right.
31:46
Yeah, I did it and I'm enjoying the fruits of my labor.
31:48
Like when I'm working, I wanna work, and when I'm with my
31:51
son, I wanna be with my son.
31:53
And he is so.
31:55
Present in himself and with me.
31:57
So he doesn't even watch TV.
31:58
He wants to read a book, and he wants to sit in my lap.
32:00
He doesn't want me on the phone.
32:02
He doesn't want me to FaceTime anybody.
32:04
I pick him up from daycare, he wants me and him.
32:07
That's it.
32:08
Like he'll tell people bye.
32:10
He'll be like, "Okay, bye.
32:12
Oh
32:13
Mommy read me a book." So,
32:14
that's it.
32:15
So I can't be, at home and like, "Oh, I gotta look. I gotta check
32:19
this email." Like it's over.
32:20
The day's over.
32:21
It's about him.
32:22
I wanna be
32:22
beautiful.
32:23
I think that's great that all the hard work you've put in in establishing
32:27
yourself in this career and allowed you to do that, but it is still a leap to take.
32:31
So you are a risk taker, which you said before.
32:33
There's, there's areas where you're taking that
32:35
I'm a faith walker too.
32:36
I'll say that.
32:37
Like I, I am very in tune with my spirituality and God leading me.
32:42
The reason for me going into full-time entrepreneurship is so I could be a
32:45
better mother and be a happy mother.
32:47
Because I did do corporate America the first year of my
32:50
son's life, and it was just…
32:51
I was so drained.
32:53
I was so sleep deprived.
32:54
Some women can do it.
32:55
I am not one of those women.
32:58
and I'm clear on that, and that's okay.
32:59
I don't have to be Superwoman.
33:00
I don't have to be, you know, she's got it all.
33:04
Like, no, I'm a mom first, and, um, this business is helping me do that
33:10
That's beautiful, and it does take faith to step out and do your own
33:13
thing, so I definitely see that in you.
33:16
And I do wanna show a picture of your son.
33:17
I did meet him once.
33:19
Very, very adorable.
33:20
I was like, "Oh, he's so cute."
33:21
I think everybody else wants to see him as well,
33:25
That's my baby.
33:25
You see he got that blonde hair.
33:27
That hair is so beautiful.
33:30
He does follow after you, huh?
33:32
mm-hmm.
33:33
He has all the highlights of my hair as his whole one color of his hair.
33:38
Aw, so cute.
33:39
And do you do his hair?
33:40
Yes, I do his hair every morning.
33:42
I have to pick it out because it is, it is my hair, so it is
33:46
very coarse and naturally dry, and it just soaks up everything.
33:52
So every morning I have to mist his hair with water.
33:55
I have to put some different oils in it and run my fingers through it
33:59
and then pick it out every morning.
34:02
So that's literally part… He, like, he has a chair where he sits.
34:05
Oh, he sits for you.
34:06
He doesn't run around?
34:07
That's good.
34:08
Yeah, he sit, yeah.
34:09
At first it was running around, and then I used to be chasing him trying to pick out
34:13
his hair, but now we've got a good groove.
34:16
He knows after I Vaseline that face and put those clothes on for school,
34:19
you sit down and you get your hair picked out for, for 60 seconds.
34:23
So, yeah.
34:25
train them up.
34:25
They'll be ready.
34:26
Yeah, it's-
34:28
I love it.
34:29
And before, before we leave,
34:31
. , Where do you think people should start in terms of skills if they
34:34
wanna learn how to do their own hair?
34:37
Yeah.
34:37
Start with learning how to do your own braids.
34:41
And not singular braids, but like cornrows basically just know how to do
34:46
some straight cornrows back on your head.
34:48
Keep practicing on that 'cause when I first started trying to
34:50
do that, I think I was like, I don't know, 11 or 12, it was…
34:54
They were very loose, but then I realized, okay, I don't have to pull
34:58
super hard to have a nice tight braid.
35:00
So just practice.
35:02
And sometimes even when I was bored, I would just sit, you know,
35:06
watch TV and just braid one braid going back on the side of my head.
35:09
Oh,
35:10
yeah, so just start there, especially if you think you're interested in
35:12
crochet hair, you have to have a good foundation with the braids.
35:17
And you want your braids to be fairly tight, not too tight, but fairly tight
35:21
so it can last more than a couple days.
35:25
So I think just start there, and once you know how to braid and cornrow
35:30
your hair, the sky's the limit.
35:32
That's the hardest part, I think.
35:34
People don't know how to braid, so.
35:35
that unlocks -- even doing a, a braid out or something like that, -- the
35:39
cornrows are gonna give you a more uniform result, and then the crochets.
35:43
Okay.
35:43
And that's just from looking at YouTube videos, trying to watch it?
35:47
Yeah, look at YouTube videos, try it on yourself, try it on your friends.
35:52
Don't be afraid to mess up, and just keep, keep going at it.
35:56
And your, and your fingers, they'll do their own muscle memory.
35:59
I mean, I don't even look in the mirror when I do my braids now,
36:02
Really?
36:02
Okay.
36:03
Wow, that's amazing.
36:05
Well, this has been wonderful talking with you.
36:08
Definitely, you're an inspiring person.
36:10
I was so excited when you say- said yes to be on the podcast because I've seen
36:14
you at work and just how you move and all the different styles, and I s- I thought,
36:19
you know, this is someone who I think the audience would really enjoy hearing,
36:23
and you have such a great experience and background, and it's been wonderful having
36:27
you here, so thanks for being our guest.
36:29
And thanks for having me
36:31
Do you have any way you want people to connect with you?
36:34
Yes.
36:35
So you can connect with me, uh, at ariready.com, A-R-I-R-E-A-D-Y.com.
36:42
And we offer, as a CPA, clients hire me to achieve financial clarity into
36:47
their business, and we accomplish this through fractional CFO service,
36:51
accounting, tax, and strategic advisement.
36:53
So if you wanna know more and get into your financials or your tax,
36:57
you need some help, give us a call.
36:59
Excellent.
37:00
I-- your office was always busy, so I'm sure I know you do great work.
37:06
Well, thank you so much for joining us.
37:08
I'm gonna say goodbye here, and thank you for watching the
37:11
Tight Curls Project podcast.
37:13
Please go ahead and subscribe where you're watching or listening, and
37:16
send us a message or question if you want anything else in future episodes.
37:20
And this has been the Tight Curls Project podcast, and I'm Shadia, Take
37:23
care and show your curls some love.