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#1844 Stoicism: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Chaos - Harps · The You Project

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Speaker 1: Good a Champs. I hope you're bloody terrific. So one
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Speaker 1: of the things that we have not spoken about a
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Speaker 1: lot on this podcast is the Stoics and Stoicism. Paul Taylor,
0:14
Speaker 1: Paul Taylor, Paul Taylor. As many of you love Paul,
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Speaker 1: as you should, because he's great, the great irishman, the neuroscientists,
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Speaker 1: the bloody you bloke with seventy two degrees. He's a big,
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Speaker 1: big fan of the Stoics. He's always banging on about Stoicism,
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Speaker 1: and so what I thought I would clumsily do because
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Speaker 1: I am not a guru in this space. Although I've
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Speaker 1: read quite a bit of the Stoics and I love,
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Speaker 1: for the most part what they have to say. And
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Speaker 1: I think despite the fact that a lot of Stoic writings,
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Speaker 1: most Stoic writings in fact, on hundreds and thousands of
0:50
Speaker 1: years old, I think they're still really relevant. I should
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Speaker 1: probably write things down before I just start talking, shouldn't I.
1:00
Speaker 1: I remember when I started my research for my doctorate,
1:06
Speaker 1: I was thinking to myself, when is the first mention
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Speaker 1: of self awareness? Because my PhD is essentially around a
1:15
Speaker 1: kind of self awareness, and I was thinking that, you know,
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Speaker 1: I would do some and I'm thinking it's probably one
1:21
Speaker 1: hundred years ago. Some philosopher or some psychologist or some
1:27
Speaker 1: you know, theologian or wise person came up with one
1:32
Speaker 1: hundred or two or three hundred years ago. And I
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Speaker 1: think it was like two and a half thousand years
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Speaker 1: ago that Markusow really has said to know thyself as
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Speaker 1: the beginning of wisdom. And that's actually somewhere in my PhD,
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Speaker 1: somewhere in my that's going to be in my thesis anyway,
1:49
Speaker 1: which is basically the big book your hand in at
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Speaker 1: the end of your what they call project or program anyway.
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Speaker 1: So it's it's old, but in many ways it's due
2:01
Speaker 1: and it's relevant, and I think we should all learn
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Speaker 1: a little bit at least a little bit about stoicism,
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Speaker 1: and not because it's and the ideas and the thinking
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Speaker 1: behind it, not because it's trendy or not because it's
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Speaker 1: current or academic or instagrammable, but because it's it's timeless,
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Speaker 1: Like it's really timeless, and it's useful, and it's weirdly
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Speaker 1: both confronting and comforting when life goes sideways, and like
2:36
Speaker 1: one of the things that really resonates for me is
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Speaker 1: the fact that you know, two thousand and two and
2:42
Speaker 1: a half thousand years down the track from when a
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Speaker 1: lot of a lot of the really powerful stuff and
2:50
Speaker 1: well known stuff today, when it was written like over
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Speaker 1: to millennia ago, the things that people were worrying about.
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Speaker 1: We're talking about human behavior in relationships and communication and
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Speaker 1: thinking and fear and self regulation and self management and
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Speaker 1: controlling controllables, and all of those things that we talk
3:09
Speaker 1: about today, they were talking about them back then. In
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Speaker 1: many ways. I mean, psychology itself as a profession, as
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Speaker 1: a field, psychology is not old at all. I think
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Speaker 1: it was developed in the eight hundred, so it's a
3:25
Speaker 1: century and a half or don't quote me, but it's
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Speaker 1: not old at all. But stoicism, which was essentially talking
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Speaker 1: about many of the same things, same ideas. You know,
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Speaker 1: how do humans work, how do they think? How do
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Speaker 1: they operate? And more importantly, not only how do they
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Speaker 1: think and work and operate, but what's optimal? What's the
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Speaker 1: best way for us to operate and think and behave
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Speaker 1: so that we might produce great results in our lives.
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Speaker 1: So what is stoicism? Where did it come from? What
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Speaker 1: isn't it? Why is it so relevance, and I guess,
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Speaker 1: I guess, most importantly, how can we do something with
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Speaker 1: it or about it? How can we operationalize it? I
4:12
Speaker 1: always use that term, don't I? And what does that mean?
4:15
Speaker 1: By the way, Let's just quickly, so when we have
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Speaker 1: an idea or a construct or a strategy, or a
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Speaker 1: piece of knowledge or information that's useful, operationalizing it basically
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Speaker 1: means just using it, putting it into action. And that's
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Speaker 1: one of my one of the things I want to
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Speaker 1: constantly come back to an underline in this space of
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Speaker 1: personal development, self help, human behavior is the vast amount
4:42
Speaker 1: of content we have and research and resources that we have,
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Speaker 1: but how little that stuff gets put consistently to use
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Speaker 1: and into practice. And it doesn't matter what we know
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Speaker 1: if we're not using what we know in an effective way,
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Speaker 1: because knowledge knowledge is not power. Knowing what to do
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Speaker 1: is not doing what we know. Having a gym membership
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Speaker 1: is not going to the gym and training. Knowing how
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Speaker 1: to get in shape is not the same as getting
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Speaker 1: in shape. Knowing that that you know doing a certain
5:15
Speaker 1: thing is bad for you doesn't mean you're not going
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Speaker 1: to do it. So so much of this stuff, and
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Speaker 1: this is what I love about Stoicism. It's very much
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Speaker 1: about doing. It's not at all fluffy, and I guess
5:30
Speaker 1: at its core, Stoicism is a really it's a philosophy,
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Speaker 1: but it is. It's a way of being and living
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Speaker 1: and doing, so we could call it a practical philosophy.
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Speaker 1: It's not a religion. It's not a cult. It's not
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Speaker 1: a rigid doctrine. It's not written by one person. That's
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Speaker 1: written by and it's created by and shared by and
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Speaker 1: still developed by. And of course Stoicism exists now and
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Speaker 1: there are still people who are Stoics and who are
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Speaker 1: writing Stoic literature and books. And there are people like
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Speaker 1: Ryan Holidays. That his name he Ryan Holiday. He's very
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Speaker 1: much a big, big fan of the Stoics who he's
6:17
Speaker 1: almost single handedly created a bit of a revival in
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Speaker 1: Stoicism globally, and he's at the forefront very much. But
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Speaker 1: at these ideas, these thoughts, these concepts and constructs, they
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Speaker 1: ain't new, but they're still as relevant forever. So it's
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Speaker 1: not a religion, it's not a cult. It's not a
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Speaker 1: set in stone, rigid doctrine. I guess it's a framework
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Speaker 1: for living well, especially when life is hard when life
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Speaker 1: is uncertain and unfair and messy and in the middle
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Speaker 1: of the troughs. Yeah, and it's like, I think, that's
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Speaker 1: just knowing that sometimes life is going to be shit.
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Speaker 1: Guess what, that's a stoic statement. Life is going to
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Speaker 1: be shit. That's stoicism. I know that. You know that,
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Speaker 1: all right? I accept it. Now what can I do?
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Speaker 1: That's a stoic mindset. In the middle of the shit?
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Speaker 1: What's in my control? In the middle of the shit?
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Speaker 1: What can I do in the middle of the shit?
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Speaker 1: What is the best use of my energy and time?
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Speaker 1: In the middle of the crap, in the middle of
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Speaker 1: the thing that's happening that I don't want to be happening,
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Speaker 1: but I can't stop it from happening. I'm just in
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Speaker 1: the middle of it. What should I do? What should
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Speaker 1: I not do? What should I do? More of what
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Speaker 1: should I do? Less of what's working and what's not
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Speaker 1: And so Stoicism was born in ancient Greece around three
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Speaker 1: hundred ish BC thanks to a bloke named Zeno of Sidium,
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Speaker 1: And legend has it, don't you love that that after
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Speaker 1: a shipwreck he found himself in Athens and he wandered
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Speaker 1: into When I originally read this, it's set a bookstore,
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Speaker 1: and I'm like, surely there weren't fucking bookstores. I know
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Speaker 1: the printing press was invented in the fifteen hundred, so
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Speaker 1: what kind of anyway? I did a deeper dive. I
8:12
Speaker 1: did a deeper dive. And he didn't wander into a
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Speaker 1: bookstore at all. He wandered into a place where there
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Speaker 1: were scrolls, basically ancient versions of books or writings, and
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Speaker 1: in that place he read about Socrates. Of course you've
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Speaker 1: all heard of Socrates. In that moment for the first time,
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Speaker 1: xeno Osidium had this kind of revelation, this aha moment
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Speaker 1: as we all, well we don't all do we? I
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Speaker 1: hope we all do. He had this kind of what
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Speaker 1: am I doing with my life moment? What is the point?
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Speaker 1: What is it all about? What is my reason? What
8:48
Speaker 1: am I doing? Kind of like kind of like an
8:53
Speaker 1: ancient personal development awakening. And so from there around thround
8:59
Speaker 1: a BC, he started to pull together some of these
9:05
Speaker 1: ideas and he started teaching. And the place that he
9:11
Speaker 1: taught was under a painted porch or a stower, which
9:15
Speaker 1: is where the term stower sism. Although it's Stowe isism,
9:19
Speaker 1: but that's where it came from. And so the big ideas,
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Speaker 1: I guess the key I reckon, the main idea, the
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Speaker 1: key idea in Stoicism. So the central Stoic construct or
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Speaker 1: premise is that there are things that you can control
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Speaker 1: and things you can't, and peace and power come from
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Speaker 1: knowing the difference. Like that's it, that's the backbone. Can't
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Speaker 1: control the weather, can't control other people's opinions, as I've
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Speaker 1: said many times, or your past, or genetics or global events.
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Speaker 1: But you can control your attitude, your actions, your mindset,
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Speaker 1: how you respond, how you talk to others, how you
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Speaker 1: talk to yourself, and this idea alone of acknowledging what
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Speaker 1: we can't control. Of course, can't control all those things
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Speaker 1: I just mentioned. But what I can, what I can
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Speaker 1: do also not easily, sometimes it's easy, sometimes difficult, But
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Speaker 1: if I lean into that idea of well, I can
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Speaker 1: I can control me or I can control me more.
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Speaker 1: I definitely can't control the weather or the government. I
10:34
Speaker 1: definitely can't undo or change what happened a week ago,
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Speaker 1: a month ago, a year ago. But what I can
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Speaker 1: try to do is I can try to manage my
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Speaker 1: responses and my thinking and my choices and my outcomes
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Speaker 1: by self regulating and self managing in the middle of
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Speaker 1: all of the variables that are out of my control.
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Speaker 1: And so you if you into stoicism or you've paid
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Speaker 1: any tension, Like, what I love about the guys I'm
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Speaker 1: about to mention is that like none of them came
11:09
Speaker 1: from anything fancy, Like none of them were born into
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Speaker 1: wealth or opulence. So epititis spelled epic titis, epic tites.
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Speaker 1: He was born as slave. He became as a philosopher,
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Speaker 1: and he's he's kind of hardcore. He is primarily about discipline, mindset, detachment. Seneca,
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Speaker 1: who you probably heard of, He, despite what earlier said,
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Speaker 1: he was, didn't start out, but he became a wealthy
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Speaker 1: Roman advisor and he wrote, he wrote extensively and beautifully
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Speaker 1: about how to live and die. Well, I love that
11:53
Speaker 1: kind of stuff. He's he's near the top of my
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Speaker 1: list and maybe the most, if not the most, one
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Speaker 1: of the most famous stoics as Marcus Aurelius, who, as
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Speaker 1: some of you will know, was a Roman emperor. He
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Speaker 1: wrote meditations and he basically was journaling his thoughts about life.
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Speaker 1: And as I may have this wrong. But I'm pretty
12:19
Speaker 1: sure he didn't write it so it'd be read by anyone.
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Speaker 1: He wrote it for himself. It was almost like his
12:26
Speaker 1: personal account, his diary, and so he wrote meditations which
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Speaker 1: are still available now, became a very very famous and
12:33
Speaker 1: it's gone through peaks and troughs of popularity and at
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Speaker 1: the moment it's still quite popular. Where he wrote that
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Speaker 1: journaling his thoughts about life, peaks and troughs, his struggle
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Speaker 1: and all while running his empire and dealing with the
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Speaker 1: fucking mayhem of war and plagues and personal grief. And
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Speaker 1: the last one we've spoken about in anyways, Zeno was
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Speaker 1: the og, the original, is the original gangster of stoicism,
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Speaker 1: because he he kind of drew it all together and
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Speaker 1: started the movement. And I think, you know, it's it's
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Speaker 1: good to acknowledge that while some of these guys had
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Speaker 1: different levels of wealth, but none of them had easy lives,
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Speaker 1: which is kind of the point. So I think when
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Speaker 1: you hear about stoicism and people talking about it, you
13:33
Speaker 1: can think that, oh, this is just brutal. There's no empathy,
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Speaker 1: there's no kindness, there's no emotion. It's it's almost inhumane.
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Speaker 1: Whereas as I understand it and experience, it's not that
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Speaker 1: at all. So let's clear up a few misconceptions. Maybe,
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Speaker 1: So stoicism is not emotionless. So stoicism in courages us
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Speaker 1: to think and feel, but also to aim to respond wisely,
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Speaker 1: not to react impulsively. Not always, but as a rule,
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Speaker 1: the more impulsive we are, the more out of control
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Speaker 1: we often are. Not that we want to be control freaks,
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Speaker 1: but we want to respond positively to those things that
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Speaker 1: I spoke about before that are out of our control
14:29
Speaker 1: so that we create good outcomes. So stoicism is not emotionless.
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Speaker 1: It's not passivity. Like we're still taking action, we still
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Speaker 1: have goals, we still get involved. We just don't waste
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Speaker 1: energy on what we can't control. So it's not about
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Speaker 1: being passive. It's not about being a passenger. It's not
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Speaker 1: about sitting in the stands and just seeing what happens.
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Speaker 1: We're still up to our neck. We're still doing hard stuff.
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Speaker 1: We're making decisions, were take action, we're controlling our controllables.
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Speaker 1: We're very involved, we're supporting others. We're doing all this
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Speaker 1: stuff that we can to do be create the life
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Speaker 1: we want to leave, the success we want to experience,
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Speaker 1: the goals that we want to create, the impact that
15:13
Speaker 1: we want to have. We're doing all of that, but
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Speaker 1: we're just not wasting energy on shit that we can't change.
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Speaker 1: And I guess finally, what stoicism isn't it's not cold detachment.
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Speaker 1: Stoicism actually encourages compassion, justice, humility, and service. In fact,
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Speaker 1: it's incredibly human. It just asks what kind of human
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Speaker 1: do you want to be when things are hard? What
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Speaker 1: kind of human do you want to be in the
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Speaker 1: middle of the mayhem and the madness and the shit.
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Speaker 1: And I think in many ways, stoicism is a philosophy
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Speaker 1: that helps us deal with the hardest parts of the
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Speaker 1: human experience. And it's very practical and it's very realistic.
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Speaker 1: And I mean pain and suffering and discomfort and uncertainty
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Speaker 1: and unfamiliarity and the unknown. All of these things that
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Speaker 1: we don't love are inevitabilities of being you and me.
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Speaker 1: They are going to happen, as is joy, as is fun,
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Speaker 1: as is hopefully love and kindness on planet you. But
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Speaker 1: why stoicism matters, it still really matters in twenty twenty five,
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Speaker 1: is because no matter how positive we are, no matter
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Speaker 1: how evolved we become. No matter how deep and spiritual
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Speaker 1: and philosophical we are, people are still going to fuck
16:58
Speaker 1: us over, not everyone that's someone. People are going to
17:02
Speaker 1: disappoint us and hurt us. People are going to let
17:05
Speaker 1: us down, People are going to lie to us. Now,
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Speaker 1: you might be the one person in the world who
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Speaker 1: doesn't have any of that ever, that's you, well done,
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Speaker 1: But the rest of us we have that shit happen periodically,
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Speaker 1: hopefully not all the time, but it happens. Plans fall apart,
17:25
Speaker 1: things don't work out, health fails, problems arise, things that
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Speaker 1: we never anticipated or expected fall on our head metaphorically.
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Speaker 1: And so what stoicism does is this kind of way
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Speaker 1: of dealing with you know, celebrating the great stuff, writing
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Speaker 1: that wave of you know, awesomeness when it's happening, but
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Speaker 1: being able to be ready to deal with the crappy stuff,
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Speaker 1: and gives us almost like a psychological, emotional and behaviorable
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Speaker 1: behavioral toolkit for handling things without falling apart. You Know,
18:11
Speaker 1: one of the things I ask people is not how
18:17
Speaker 1: motivated can you get and how pumped up and excited
18:20
Speaker 1: can you get? But how productive and proactive and effective
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Speaker 1: can you be when things are shit, or when you're
18:28
Speaker 1: not motivated, or when you're not excited, or when people
18:31
Speaker 1: aren't looking or they're not cheering, or you don't have
18:34
Speaker 1: any support, or it's not fun and it's not quick
18:37
Speaker 1: and it's not painless. In fact, it's fucking horrible. How
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Speaker 1: productive and proactive and effective can you be? Then? How
18:46
Speaker 1: committed can you stay? Then? And stoicism helps us stay
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Speaker 1: grounded and resilient and focused and doing the things that
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Speaker 1: we need to do without pretending that things are perfect.
19:02
Speaker 1: Like we're very practical and realistic. We're grounded. Life's not
19:05
Speaker 1: a Disney movie. Good things happen to bad people, bad
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Speaker 1: things happen to good people. For me, stoicism is almost
19:13
Speaker 1: like emotional strength training or for some of my listeners
19:18
Speaker 1: mental jiu jitsu. You're not stopping bad things from happening,
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Speaker 1: but you're just stopping them from destroying you. So stoicism
19:32
Speaker 1: is going to help us with reducing our overthinking because
19:38
Speaker 1: we're not going to waste so much time obsessing about
19:42
Speaker 1: thinking about overthinking, investing emotional and psycho energy psychological energy
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Speaker 1: in things we can't control. We're going to be less
19:53
Speaker 1: emotionally reactive. We're going to be calmer under pressure. We're
20:01
Speaker 1: going to put more focus on the things that actually
20:04
Speaker 1: matter and give less focus and attention and energy to
20:08
Speaker 1: the things that don't matter or that we can't control.
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Speaker 1: It's going to improve relationships, it's going to improve self discipline.
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Speaker 1: It's not about Stoicism is not about, in fact, I
20:23
Speaker 1: think any optimal human operating system you being better, doing better,
20:28
Speaker 1: thinking better, you know, on the self help journey, the
20:30
Speaker 1: personal growth journey, the whatever it is for you, but
20:33
Speaker 1: being better journey. It's not about avoiding hard things. It's
20:40
Speaker 1: about being better in the middle of the hard things.
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Speaker 1: So there's a couple of things I want to go
20:48
Speaker 1: through with you and then we'll we'll wrap it up.
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Speaker 1: So practical stoicism, the dichotomy of control. Ask yourself is
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Speaker 1: this in my control? Is this in my control? And
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Speaker 1: if the answer is yes, then do something. And if
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Speaker 1: the answer is no, let it go. Easier said than done,
21:13
Speaker 1: of course, as is everything before you point that out
21:16
Speaker 1: to me, of course, everything is literally easier said than done.
21:20
Speaker 1: Losing weight easier said than done, Building a business easier
21:22
Speaker 1: said than done. It's going a PhD, you know, redesigning
21:26
Speaker 1: the house, painting the fucking spare room. All easier said
21:28
Speaker 1: than done, of course, But if it's not in your control,
21:33
Speaker 1: let it go, refocus, move on. If it is, then
21:35
Speaker 1: do something and do something quick. Don't wax and Wayne,
21:40
Speaker 1: don't wait around number two on my list of kind
21:46
Speaker 1: of practical stoicism concepts. Number two is negative visualization. Imagine
21:51
Speaker 1: losing what you take for granted, your job, your health,
21:58
Speaker 1: you loved ones or loved one. I know this sounds
22:01
Speaker 1: fucking grim, but it's not really happening, But imagine, imagine,
22:07
Speaker 1: imagine losing something that you love, that you value, that
22:10
Speaker 1: you rely on, that you need, that is intertwined with
22:14
Speaker 1: who you are and how you are. Imagine that, and
22:18
Speaker 1: then imagine zooming back to right now where that's not
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Speaker 1: the case. You still have that thing. That's a shift
22:27
Speaker 1: in gratitude, isn't it. And this kind of negative visualization
22:31
Speaker 1: builds appreciation and emotional strength and also a level of
22:35
Speaker 1: gratitude and awareness. Number three. We've got five things number three,
22:41
Speaker 1: and Paul Taylor talks about this a lot. Voluntary discomfort,
22:46
Speaker 1: and that could be something as practical as a cold shower,
22:50
Speaker 1: It could be skipping a meal, it could be. It
22:55
Speaker 1: could be how about this, how about leaving your home,
23:00
Speaker 1: leaving your phone at home? How about having a day
23:06
Speaker 1: away from technology, or six hours away from technology, or
23:09
Speaker 1: a weekend away, or how about having a hard conversation
23:14
Speaker 1: with somebody. I think, I really think it's a good
23:20
Speaker 1: idea to practice inconvenience and to be okay with inconvenience.
23:27
Speaker 1: We are very and I think it's something that's evolved
23:32
Speaker 1: more and more over time, but we are very much,
23:34
Speaker 1: especially in twenty twenty five, especially in Australia, I can
23:38
Speaker 1: only talk with any kind of level of I guess confidence.
23:43
Speaker 1: But even then I put an asterisk next to that
23:45
Speaker 1: because I'm just looking through the Craig lens. But I
23:49
Speaker 1: think as a society and a culture, we are very
23:53
Speaker 1: very much enamored by and in love with convenience and
23:57
Speaker 1: familiarity and predictability and certainty and two minute abs and
24:03
Speaker 1: reward without work and instant gratification and all of those
24:08
Speaker 1: things that are at odds with stoicism and being able
24:15
Speaker 1: to go. You know what, I'm going to wait, I'm
24:18
Speaker 1: going to lean into the pain now. I'm not going
24:21
Speaker 1: to lean in recklessly, but I'm going to lean in strategically,
24:25
Speaker 1: I'm going to do the hard thing. I'm going to
24:27
Speaker 1: do the hard thing one because it needs to be done.
24:29
Speaker 1: And also I'm going to do the hard thing because
24:31
Speaker 1: that's where I grow, learn a vole, develop, that's where
24:34
Speaker 1: I become different, that's where I build resilience, I gain understanding. Firstly,
24:41
Speaker 1: I'm going to say that with what I'm about to say,
24:43
Speaker 1: my life has been very easy. I've been very blessed.
24:47
Speaker 1: I've naturally my parents were great, school for the most part,
24:52
Speaker 1: was great, my childhood was great. I was born in
24:54
Speaker 1: a beautiful country with amazing people around me. So there's
24:57
Speaker 1: no self pity at all, and what I'm about say
25:01
Speaker 1: only gratitude. But I've been through quite a few hard things,
25:06
Speaker 1: and a lot of those hard things I created, either
25:11
Speaker 1: intentionally or unintentionally. Some things I just fucked up. I
25:15
Speaker 1: did wrong, I got wrong, and there was there was
25:17
Speaker 1: a lot of pain, There was rejection, There was emotional, psychological, financial,
25:22
Speaker 1: and physiological hardship at times. But I know that for me,
25:30
Speaker 1: where I grew and you know what I'm going to say,
25:32
Speaker 1: but it's just true, where I grew and learned and
25:35
Speaker 1: got better and I evolved and my understanding shifted and
25:39
Speaker 1: my awareness and level of gratitude changed in the middle
25:43
Speaker 1: of the shit, in the middle of the hard things,
25:45
Speaker 1: the uncomfortable things. And I think this practice of choosing discomfort,
25:54
Speaker 1: this practice of choosing the narrow path, and not not
26:00
Speaker 1: to do something hard just for the sake of doing
26:03
Speaker 1: something hard, but doing the right thing that also happens
26:07
Speaker 1: to be the hard thing. And I think quite often
26:12
Speaker 1: when it comes to this idea of you know, growing
26:19
Speaker 1: and learning and evolving and you know, leaning into all
26:21
Speaker 1: of these ideas, I think, deep down, maybe not even
26:25
Speaker 1: deep down, maybe maybe on a surface level, we know
26:29
Speaker 1: that the thing that we need to do is not
26:32
Speaker 1: the thing we actually want to do. Because while we
26:35
Speaker 1: understand where growth and development and awareness and all of
26:38
Speaker 1: those things live and evolve and develop, we also know, well,
26:42
Speaker 1: I can take this left turn. It's going to be
26:45
Speaker 1: much easier, it's going to be much more convenient, it's
26:47
Speaker 1: going to be much more familiar, and nobody's going to
26:51
Speaker 1: call me on it. I think that I think that
26:56
Speaker 1: doing the hard thing is is quite often the thing
27:04
Speaker 1: that is going to give us the most benefit. I'm
27:05
Speaker 1: going to tell you a little story, so just quickly
27:08
Speaker 1: this just came into my head. I don't even know
27:10
Speaker 1: if it's relevant, but I want to share it with you.
27:15
Speaker 1: So it's Saturday night. It is the twenty ninth of March,
27:20
Speaker 1: So Saturday night tomorrow, I have a big day of UNI.
27:23
Speaker 1: I have a lot of things on. I have lots
27:26
Speaker 1: of work to do, lots of boxes to tick, and
27:28
Speaker 1: that's all great, lots of study, lots of research and great.
27:36
Speaker 1: I'm also going to say to you, this is my
27:38
Speaker 1: fifth podcast that I've recorded today, and one of those
27:41
Speaker 1: podcasts was nearly two hours with Perry, and every part
27:48
Speaker 1: of my body and brain before I started, before I
27:54
Speaker 1: started this podcast felt like not doing it now, just
28:01
Speaker 1: from a personal comfort point of view, I'm like, I don't.
28:06
Speaker 1: I've done four falls, great falls, great. But I know
28:09
Speaker 1: I've got a very big week. I've got some travel,
28:11
Speaker 1: I've got some speaking, I've got lots of commitments. Like
28:14
Speaker 1: I said, it's Saturday night, Monday night, I've got my group.
28:16
Speaker 1: I've got to prepare for my online mentor and group tomorrow.
28:19
Speaker 1: I've got research and union all day. I've got lots
28:21
Speaker 1: of things to do. And the stoic part of me
28:25
Speaker 1: was like, do another one? Tonight. Then you've got five
28:28
Speaker 1: in the can, as we say, you've got five recorded,
28:32
Speaker 1: and then that kind of But the challenge is not
28:35
Speaker 1: to do another one. The challenge is to do another one.
28:41
Speaker 1: That's for what I can do. It's great or it's
28:45
Speaker 1: somewhere near great. So it's not like, hey everyone, it's
28:49
Speaker 1: quarter to ten. You're getting the quarter to ten Saturday
28:52
Speaker 1: version of Craig at the end of the day, when
28:55
Speaker 1: his throat's a bit sore, he's a bit tired. No, like,
28:59
Speaker 1: my my intention once I made a decision to do
29:02
Speaker 1: this was like it needs to be like, this is
29:05
Speaker 1: my first one for the day, and hopefully for you
29:09
Speaker 1: can sense my energy and my commitment to doing this
29:12
Speaker 1: thing that my body wanted me to go to bed,
29:16
Speaker 1: and by the way, I'll go to bed after this,
29:20
Speaker 1: but just being able to go, you know what, I'm
29:21
Speaker 1: going to do the thing that's inconvenient, the thing that's hard,
29:24
Speaker 1: because that's going to make tomorrow easier. And so I
29:28
Speaker 1: like the fact that you know, I can integrate what
29:32
Speaker 1: I just told you into this message of practical stoicism.
29:37
Speaker 1: A couple of more things, A couple of things more,
29:40
Speaker 1: I should say. So one was dichotomy of control, what's
29:43
Speaker 1: within my control? Two is negative visualization. Three was voluntary discomfort.
29:48
Speaker 1: Four is daily reflection. And that's just almost where we
29:53
Speaker 1: might journal. We might look back on the day, what
29:55
Speaker 1: did I do well? What could I do better? And
29:59
Speaker 1: were trying to do this without emotion. We're trying to
30:02
Speaker 1: do this through the lens of intellect and strategy and
30:08
Speaker 1: just practical awareness. What did I do great? What could
30:12
Speaker 1: I have done better? What can I learn from today?
30:14
Speaker 1: What did I learn today? Where did I react emotionally?
30:20
Speaker 1: And this kind of reflection is it's kind of like
30:24
Speaker 1: keeping back in the day when I used to get
30:25
Speaker 1: all of my clients to keep a food and exercise diary,
30:29
Speaker 1: And now we've got a new level of awareness and
30:31
Speaker 1: understanding and insight into everything that goes into our mouth
30:34
Speaker 1: and our body. Well this is kind of the same,
30:36
Speaker 1: but it's really everything that's going into our mind and
30:39
Speaker 1: into our brain and to be able to hit the
30:41
Speaker 1: brakes at the end of the day, like I will
30:44
Speaker 1: do after this when I go and make myself a
30:46
Speaker 1: cup of tea. You probably shouldn't have a cup of
30:47
Speaker 1: tea before bed, but fuck it, live on the edge
30:50
Speaker 1: and just deconstruct the day practically and figure out what
30:54
Speaker 1: I did well, what I could have done better, what
30:56
Speaker 1: I learned, and even something like I constantly set challenges
31:02
Speaker 1: for myself that usually I don't talk about here in
31:06
Speaker 1: this format, but even like the challenge of like, can
31:10
Speaker 1: I do a podcast on a Saturday nights now three
31:12
Speaker 1: minutes ten? Can I do a podcast on a Saturday
31:14
Speaker 1: night at ten o'clock when I'm tired and probably not
31:18
Speaker 1: cognitively optimal, but still do as good a job as
31:22
Speaker 1: I will do in the morning when I'm brand new.
31:27
Speaker 1: I don't know what the answer is, but hopefully, hopefully
31:31
Speaker 1: a number four of number four is called I'm more fati,
31:37
Speaker 1: which is I think it's Latin for love of fate.
31:41
Speaker 1: So instead of resenting what happens, the bad stuff, the
31:45
Speaker 1: messy stuff, just use it as fuel, see it as fuel,
31:51
Speaker 1: see it as an experience that you can learn from.
31:54
Speaker 1: Use everything, the good, the bad, the unexpected, use all
31:57
Speaker 1: of the stuff. Find the lesson. Find the lesson. Even
32:01
Speaker 1: in the middle of pain, sometimes there's joy. Sometimes there's development,
32:07
Speaker 1: Sometimes there's a real benefit. Sometimes in the middle of
32:11
Speaker 1: failure there's success. I'm learning what not to do, so
32:17
Speaker 1: many things have happened to me and because of me,
32:19
Speaker 1: and despite me that I didn't want. But many times,
32:26
Speaker 1: in the middle of the thing that I didn't want,
32:28
Speaker 1: the outcome that I didn't choose or plan or desire,
32:30
Speaker 1: in the middle of that, something great has come. So
32:36
Speaker 1: mindset shifts from the stoics. Here's for one, this isn't
32:44
Speaker 1: happening to me, It's happening for me. I'm back to
32:48
Speaker 1: our friend Ryan Holiday. This is a very often quoted statement.
32:55
Speaker 1: The obstacle is the way. I think one of his
32:57
Speaker 1: books is called I should know that. I'm pretty sure
32:59
Speaker 1: it's called The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday.
33:02
Speaker 1: The obstacle is the way. Number three. I can't control
33:05
Speaker 1: the storm, but I can control the ship. These are
33:08
Speaker 1: quite famous expressions. And as I've said to you thirty
33:12
Speaker 1: two times, what happens, what matters is not what happens,
33:15
Speaker 1: but what I do about it, how I respond. So
33:19
Speaker 1: stoicism it ain't about perfection. It's about practice. It's about
33:26
Speaker 1: being committed to a certain way of thinking and doing
33:29
Speaker 1: and being. And by the way, you're not going to
33:33
Speaker 1: develop that stoic mindset by Tuesday or Friday or whenever.
33:39
Speaker 1: I'm not sure what day a you're listening to this,
33:41
Speaker 1: But it's not about perfection. It's about revisiting those ideas.
33:47
Speaker 1: It's about practice, it's about repetition. You're still going to
33:50
Speaker 1: stuff up, you're still going to get triggered, you're still
33:53
Speaker 1: going to slip into ego, You're still going to feel
33:55
Speaker 1: shit that you don't want to feel. But over time,
33:58
Speaker 1: you'll get stronger, you'll get cart, you'll get more intentional.
34:03
Speaker 1: And you know, living in twenty twenty five and a noisy, chaotic,
34:08
Speaker 1: reactive everyone's online, fucking throwing hate at each other. To
34:12
Speaker 1: be able to have this mindset and these stoic skills
34:17
Speaker 1: and this operating system that can help us rise above
34:21
Speaker 1: all of that, that's a fucking superpower. That's what that is,
34:27
Speaker 1: all right, Grubis, Your thanks for sticking around so long.
34:31
Speaker 1: By the way, if you want to check out, if
34:38
Speaker 1: you want to check out some stoic stuff, you might
34:41
Speaker 1: want to start with Meditations by Marcus or Realist and
34:45
Speaker 1: or let Us from a Stoic by Seneca, let Us
34:50
Speaker 1: from a Stoic by Seneca, or if you want something
34:53
Speaker 1: more of a modern entry point, the Daily Stoic by
34:57
Speaker 1: Ryan Holiday, that I spoke of a couple of times
35:00
Speaker 1: during the show. And remember you can't control everything, but
35:04
Speaker 1: you can control you, all right, tem love your guts,
35:09
Speaker 1: see you next time. Go and be amazing. No pressure,
35:13
Speaker 1: in fact, all the pressure. Be amazing in the pressure.
35:16
Speaker 1: So yeah,