Latest / Dear Chelsea / Killing the Hour with Chelsea’s Trainer Ben Bruno

Transcript

Killing the Hour with Chelsea’s Trainer Ben Bruno · Dear Chelsea

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hi everybody. While I'm taking the month of September off
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: of doing stand up, I return on October one to
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: complete my Vaccinated and Horny tour. October, November, and December,
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I have new dates up. I kick it off in Saratoga, California,
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: and I'm coming to all parts of California, Long Beach,
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Baker's Field. I'm going to Niagara Falls, Tucson, Arizona, Colorado, Minneapolis,
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: San Diego, Reading, Pennsylvania, and Baltimore, Maryland, just to name
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: a few. There's also some Floridian dates in there, since
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: this will be my last year that I'm able to
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: go inside the state of Florida. So check out Chelsea
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Handler dot com for more stand up dates for my
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Vaccinated in Horny Tour. These are my last dates. Okay,
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: hello Catherine, Hi Chelsea. Oh my god, I am fresh
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: as a daisy. I'm so glad. I had a big
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: photo shoot this weekend and I had to really nail
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: it down, which was not hard at all. I actually
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: enjoyed the week of preparation because I had been on
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: vacation for base only a month and drinking obviously a lot,
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: and eating whatever I felt like. Actually, no I'm pretty
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: good when I'm my vacation, I don't go off. But anyway,
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: I had to get my act together for this photo
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: shoot that will be coming out soon. I won't say
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: what it is for yet, but everyone's going to find
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: out because it'll probably be a pretty big campaign. But
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: I love having to get ready for something because that's
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: the only reason I would just get it. Like I
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: came home for a week hunkered down. I'm like, on
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: my program, no drinking, no bada. I have been smoking pot,
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: but I'm not supposed to be smoking pot at all
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: because of my situation with my vocal cords. But I
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: decided to give myself a treat and I started a
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: new endorsement deal, also a brand partnership deal with a
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: company called leisure Town, which is a cannabis drink. So
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: you will be getting a full supply of that because
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: it has the lowest amount of sugar. It only has
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: four grams of sugar. It's calories and they're light, so
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: you can get CBD or you can get th HC,
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: and the th HC version only has two point five
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: milligram of th HC. So yeah, I'm going to bring
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: you a kid. I love that. Absolutely, that's so exciting
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: to see. I'm somebody who works the deadlines too. Like
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: if I have something that I know is coming up,
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: like I can get it done, I can make it happen.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: But like I need that sort of motivation that impetus
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: to like here's what I'm aiming for. Yeah, you know, yeah,
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: absolutely I need a deadline as well. If they left
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: to my own devices, I mean I would just basically
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: sit on my ass and it smoked pot with Bert
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: and just stare at him until the taco arrived. I
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: love it. He likes Spot a little bit more than Bernice. Well,
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: he's like a pothead, you know. That explains his laziness.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: They're so sweet though, since I haven't been there, they
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: love me now and they come in my room at
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: night and they're both on the floor and then Bert
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: looks at me in the morning like when are you
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: going to feed me? And I'm like, oh, honey, I
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: am going to feed you. Actually, because when I'm home now,
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: I take their feeding more seriously because I'm wanting to
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: know that I too love them. I'm just not that
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: interested in sticking around their way, right, and like the
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: food comes from you when you're home, not my bell
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: and yeah. Well, we have a quick follow up from
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: one of our callers. This is from Quinn, who called
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: in on our episode with Ashley Graham a few weeks ago.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: She had sort of wanted to know if she should
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: lose weight before getting into the dating scene. And she says, Hey,
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: Chelsea and Catherine. I know it's only been a short
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: time since we last spoke, but I wanted to give
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: a progress update. I just recently started a new job
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: as a campaign manager for my boss's state Assembly reelection campaign.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Don't worry, He's a Democrat and damn good one at that.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: At first, I was really nervous about taking this job,
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: as I would be in a new city where I
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: wouldn't know anyone. However, per your advice, I've begun journaling
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: most nights and have become more conscious of how I've
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: been treating myself, both physically and mentally. All of this
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: has helped me find new avenues of confidence, like being
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: a motherfucking campaign manager. This new confidence has helped me
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: get on the dating apps again in this new city
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: and begin swiping away. I haven't had a date yet,
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: but I'm definitely talking to multiple people right now, and
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: it's always fun. I know I will definitely have to
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: keep building my confidence and my healthy living journey is
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: far from over, but I am proud of the progress
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: I've made so far. Thanks for your help. Quinn. Oh,
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: great job, Quinn, wait to fucking get after it. Good job.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: I love that, I know. And it's like when you
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: start doing other things, you realize, like man, confidence can
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: come from all these different places, like it just doesn't
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: have to come from like one avenue in your life. Absolutely,
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: confidence can come from your friendships, from your family, from
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: your job, from you know, your relationship with yourself, from
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: your animals. You're just making contributions. It builds, instills confidence
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: and builds it absolutely well. It's actually a fitting follow
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: up for our guest today. He is going to join
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: us here in st Okay. Guys, you're in for a
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: real special treat. Okay. I have Ben Bruno, my trainer,
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: is our guest today and I have spent every morning
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: at eight o'clock with him for the last week. So
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: the last thing I want to do is spend an
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: hour with him on this podcast. But guess what he's
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: coming right in Yo yo yo, Ben, you put on headphones.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: All right, Ben Bruno's here today everyone. He's my personal
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: trainer and Catherine, have you ever met Ben before? And
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: not in person, just see him on your Instagram. Okay,
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: well this must be a thrill for you. Ben. Thank
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: you first of all for bringing me coffee. That was
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: really nice. I brought her coffee. I just go. Yeah,
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: he brought Katherine and me coffee. If it was for you,
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't have brought it. Well, you were texting me,
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: so it's pretty weird that you don't know that that
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: was for me. But furthermore, why did you call me
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: when I put my order in for the coffee? Oh?
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: Because the order I didn't know what it was. It
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: was called the Starbucks Refresher, which I didn't know what
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: that meant. And then when I ordered it no lemonade.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: I was faced with the choice of mango, strawberry or pineapple.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: So I called and nobody picked up. So I just
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: went with mango. So whoever that is, you're getting mango,
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: I'm really pleased. I've never tried the mango one before,
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: So here we are. We just picked what I would want.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: If you didn't like it, I was like, then I
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: would go with Mango. Thank you, Ben, strong decision making. So, Catherine,
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: Ben has been my trainer for how many years been?
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: What's our too long? Probably seven years, seven or eight years,
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: A long time, A long time. I would say it's
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: probably common law at this point. Hey annoyed me, extremely
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: annoyed me from the very outset of our relationships, and
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: I also annoy him a great deal. But we've managed
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: to remain in a trainer relationship for a very long time,
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: my longest trainer relationship, that's for sure. And so he's
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: trained a lot of my friends and a lot of
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: my family members, and no one who's really as enthusiastic
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: as I am about working out. I wouldn't I wouldn't
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: call it enthusiastic. No, you're not enthusiastic at all. But well,
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: what it's my motivation? Then I will say, you always
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: do show up, but you never seem to like it. Well,
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know what kind of excitement you
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: want to happen during a workout where you come out
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: of a set and you're like, fuck, that was killed.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: I don't. I get it's just working out, But I
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: also think I've never actually met trying to think that
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: this is true. But I don't think I've met anyone
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: that complains more than you do. I don't. That's such bullshit.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: That is a total bullshit. No, it's not about working out.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: I complain about or put me on a polygraph. I'm serious. Well,
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: we don't have a polygraph, Ben, because that's from the
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: I'm telling the truth. No, they still use polygraph not
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: admissible in court though. Anyway, Ben, are you what people
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: would consider a bro? In some ways? I'm a bro?
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: I yeah, I don't like to admit it. But when
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: I think of my interests and what I do for
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: fun and things, for better or worse, I'm just like
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: a typical dude. Right, Okay, so you what does that
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: mean to you? What are your interests? You know, I
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: like working out, I like watching football. I love golf.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: I love watching golf. All my golf friends understand that
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: everyone else thinks that's the dumbest thing ever. I like
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: dude stuff. I like, uh, you know, my go to
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: order is a burger and fries. Yeah, I would say
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: I'm pretty average. I actually googled average height for a
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: dude because I have a lot of friends that play basketball,
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: and so when I'm around them. I feel like I'm
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: just three ft tall, and I'm right on average. I'm
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: five nine and three quarters and the average according to
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: Google is five nine and like point six. And then
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: my shoe size is a nine and a half, which
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: is average for a guy. So in just about every way,
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: I'm average. Well that's good for you to know. I'm
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: glad that there's scientific data behind that to back up
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: that argument, because yes, nine three quarters, So stop that
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: that's ridiculous. Well, no one is saying three quarters. I listen,
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: I will round up. I'm gonna say five ten. Say
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: that that's better than saying five nine and three quarters.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: Why why do you say five ten minus one quarter?
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: See just so the listeners. No, this is the type
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: of ship that I deal with every single workout. Chelsea
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: comes in every day. I'm gonna I'm gonna give the listeners.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: This is actually therapy for me. I'm gonna give the
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: listeners like taste into what I deal with on a
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: daily basis. She comes in, I say, Hi, how are
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: you feeling? Because that's actually very important because I'm a trainer.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: I need to know how your body is feeling. Then
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: I say how you doing, which to me means like
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: you're like mental state, what's been going on? Whatever? Also,
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: to backtrack, I see Chelsea every fucking day, So a
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: big part of it is just trying to kill the hour.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: I need talking points. Yeah, well that's what you do
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: need because the questions you ask are repetitive. When I say,
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: how is your body feeling? Then how you're doing? She goes,
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: you just ask me that, You just ask me because
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: you do. You have different things, but you repeat yourself
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: all the time. You go, you go like this, hold on,
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: let me talk now, you say, he goes, I come in,
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: He goes, Hey, how you doing good? How you doing? Yeah?
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: Time the third No, well, then come up with some
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: new material. There's not new material nothing. You can't just
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: keep asking the same question and hoping for a different answer.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: That doesn't make any accumulate talking points if I do
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: something on the weekend. But otherwise my day's my life's
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: ground Hug day. I trained people, and then I eat
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: dinner and I watch a little TV, go to bed
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: call today, so there's not much for us to talk
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: about from Monday to Tuesday to Wednesday. Also, her life
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: is ground Hug day, so she don't have shipped to
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: talk about either, So I'm just grasping at straws. And
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: then everything I do say she tells me is a
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: dumb question. And then also just so that people know
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: as a trainer, I I actually I find this funny.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: I take pride in being pretty creative. I'll to my
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: own horn. I I got named the most innovative trainer
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: by Men's Health. Meanwhile, every single day two years, Yeah,
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: and I'm still it is what it is. Meanwhile, in
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: my field, I'm considered innovative every day that since I've
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: trained Chelsea, which I don't know how many days that is,
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: but it's way too many. She goes Google new Ship.
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: We did this one before, as if like that's what
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: training is. You were just pretty much otate twenty exercises
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: till one of us gets sick of the other person
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: and moves on. But every day it's like Google new ship,
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: Google new ship. And then any time I show something different,
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: she's like, this is way dumber than the original one.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: This is like dumb. So that is what I go
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: through people, and you love it. You love it. I'm
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: glad it seems like you're getting stuff off your chest.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: So Katherine Ben is a very straight bro. How I
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: would classify him in my group of people that I know,
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: and he goes to therapy. He has a therapist that
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: he's been seeing for a few years now, right, six
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: or seven? Oh yeah, six or seven years. And let's
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: talk about I would like to hear about your therapy
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: experience as a male, as a bro, because a lot
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: of men can't go to therapy and they don't want
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: to even talk about what's really happening because they're scared
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: and they don't think it's a necessary So what's been
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: your experience? Well, I'll tell you how it started. I
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: tried therapy at two different points in my life before
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: this little six month run. Once six year ru six
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: year run. Sorry. Once when I was ten years old,
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: I got put in therapy, but I don't think it
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: was therapy. I think it was um, I don't know
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: all the differences, but this guy was a psychiatrist. To
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: backtrack real quick, my my dad passed away when I
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: was nine, and that's obviously there's a lot of ship
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: that comes with that. So my mom put me in
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: therapy with the guy that my dad had actually seen,
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: and that was definitely different than the therapy, I do now,
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: because that was like I would say to him that
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: that was a failed attempt. I guess because he would
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: say he was a medicine guy, and I think maybe
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: some people benefit from medicine, but I think sometimes feelings
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: of depression and stuff can be situational. Sometimes it's probably chemical,
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: sometimes it's situational. And I just remember at ten, the
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: guy would say to me, how do you feel about
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: your dad dying? And I'd say, I'm sad, and I'm like, dude,
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: who wouldn't be sid And then I went again when
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: I was probably nineteen or twenty. At another low point
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: in my life. I had a back surgery when I
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: was nineteen in college, and the surgery did nerve damage
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: in my right leg, and in hindsight, it was a
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: great thing for me because it got me into physical
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: fitness and now I'm a trainer because of it. But
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: at the time it was a real low point because
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: I had always been very physically active and into sports.
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: And after the surgery, I lost about forty pounds and
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: I'm I was this big to begin with, so I
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: didn't even have that to lose. I was super skinny
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: week and just really depressed because my right leg like
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: basically shut down. I couldn't drive or anything like that.
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: And so I was super depressed and tried therapy again,
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: but I wasn't really open to it at the time.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: Long story short, Now this is my third foray into it,
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: and this time started about six years ago. I woke
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: up one day and thought I just drank too much
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: coffee on an empty stomach and just felt wired and
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: just got something to eat, kind of went about my day.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: Second day this happened, I felt this crazy fast heartbeat
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: the middle of Los Angeles, which is hot, and I
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: was freezing cold and felt like I couldn't take in air.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: It was this really weird feeling. I couldn't breathe. So
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: I was training a guy I still trained him now,
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: and he was like, dude, you gotta go to the doctor.
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: So I went to the doctor. They did this whole
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: work up on me E k G. The treadmill test,
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: and then the guy told me I had a panic attack,
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: and I was like, what the fuck. I think most
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: of my friends people in my life would describe me
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: as pretty chill. This is like, right now, this is
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: as animated as I ever get. I'm a pretty even
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: keel person, and so the panic attack thing felt weird
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: to me because I usually felt like I was never
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: two up or down, and that really threw me for
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: a loop because I was like, wait, am I like
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: cra easy? Like what is this thing? The panic attack
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: was made worse by all those feelings that I think
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: people dudes might have when they think of, like I've
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: had a panic attack, because it seems weird. And I
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: took myself down this whole rabbit hole over that. This
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: is over the course of three or four days, where
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: I was like, I can't believe I had a panic attack,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: Like am I like this anxiety kind of person? Now?
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: I just felt very weird about it, and so someone
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: suggested therapy, and then the first person that was recommended
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: to me. Her advice was to carry around a brown
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: paper bag in case you get anxiety and then you
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: can breathe into it. And I'm like, yeah, no, I'm
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: not doing that. So then I was talking to one
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: of my family friends from home because I had remembered
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: his son got anxiety, and to be truthful, I didn't
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: even really know what anxiety was prior to that, and
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: he told me that there's this woman in l A
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: that it was a great therapist, and I looked her
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: up and she happened to be very close to my house.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: So I've seen her ever since that panic attack, And
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: originally my first appointment was just to figure out why
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: I had a panic attack, and then I've just been
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: going ever since. In some ways, I think of it
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: like a paid friend, but a friend that just gives
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: like way better advice than my real friends. Because the
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: thing about dudes, dudes don't want to go to therapy,
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: But I bet guys we probably need it more than
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: women because guys just in general give shitty advice. So
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: if you ever talk to your friends about your problems,
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: you're not getting good advice. They're probably gonna direct you
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: in a way that will like lead to more problems.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: So I think it's good to just have a professional opinion.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: And then also too, I do spend a lot of
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: time as a trainer. I take on a lot of
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: other people's problems over the course of the day. They
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: tell me all their stuff, but I don't really get
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: too into my stuff. And I realized that it's just
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: good for me to have you have this outlet to
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: get everything off your Yeah, I haven't spoken in like
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: eight minutes, so I mean, let it rap. I'm just talking. Honestly.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: I had to deal with Chelsea for an hour already today,
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: so I can't hear her talk anymore. I'm just gonna
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: keep talking. But I think for me, it's just I
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: go once a week or once every other week, and
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: I get a good sounding board, and I think sometimes
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: even if there's actually a lot of times I will
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: say I've told her straight up that I'm not really
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: good at the therapy process. Sometimes she'll ask me. I'll
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: be telling her something and she'll ask me, like, how
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: does that make you feel? And I'm like, I don't know,
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: Like I'm still trying to figure out my emotions. But
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: I think talking through things sometimes I solve my own problems.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: But it's also just good to have someone to talk to.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: And it's made me probably better than maybe it has.
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Your body is pretty good. At least
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: I've yet to google any exercises for her personality. We're
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: working on that, but I do think it helps me.
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: I noticed. I think it's helped me a lot in
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: now I have a living girlfriend. It's helped me with
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: that type of stuff and she likes it. I go
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: to therapy, so do dude should go? Just it's probably
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: a better way to get girls too. I think girls
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: actually now it's like now it's cool. Now it's cool.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: So the other part to this is I remember when
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: I first went to therapy. There was like sort of
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: a shame when I had the panic attack where I
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: felt like I was copying to guilt to a couple
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: of my buddies and across the board all my guy friends.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: But one was like, oh, yeah, dude, I go to
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: And I was like, what the funk? I've known you
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: forever and I don't even know this. Guys just don't
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: really talk about it. But I think it's more common
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: than they think. Do Have you had a panic attack
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: since you went to therapy? You know? I don't think
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: to that level, but yes I have. But it's it's
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: actually way better now knowing what it is, because I've
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: had times stress, you know, and who I don't know
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: the continuum of panic attack for stress first whatever, but
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: I've definitely had times where I'll be feeling nervous about
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: something or uncomfortable or just unhappy, and then my heart
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: rate just gets jacked. It's like I can feel it
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: throughout my whole body, or I'll just start sweating or
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: things like that. And so I've learned now it's less
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: of a panic attack, because i think part of the
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: panic part comes, at least for me, from not knowing
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: what it was. But when you know what it is,
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: and I've learned breathing techniques and I've learned how powerful
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: breath can be to back that stuff down. The breathing
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: thing is crazy in the sense that I can go
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: from feeling jacked up to like a zen like stoned,
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: in like a minute, just through breath. What breathing exercises
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: do you do? Uh? Well, they're all cousins of each other.
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: I think I've learned different ones, but one is called
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: It's just a breathing ladder that I learned, and that
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: is essentially the exhales twice as long as the inhale.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: So you breathe in for one second, out for two,
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: in for two out for four, three, six, four, eight,
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: five ten, then you do five ten twice and then
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: go back down four eight, three, six, etcetera. And by
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: the end, etcetera. And then by the end you know
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: you you either are cool, or you do it once through.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: Another thing that I just learned actually from therapy is
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: called square breathing, and I believe in and it started
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: with the Navy seals. I could be wrong about that,
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: but I think that's what she said, and that's essentially
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: think of a square. So the you inhale for four,
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: then hold it for four seconds, exhale for four, hold
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: it for four seconds, and you repeat that. Another thing
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: is called five seven eight. You'll see they're all related,
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: but five five seven eight is breathe in for five,
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: hold it for seven, exhale for eight. That that I
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: learned from my training mentor, Mike Boyle, and that takes
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: it's a twenty second breath and you go through three times.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: He actually told it to me in the sense of
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: he's a he's a napper and can basically put himself
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: to sleep in the afternoon doing that, which is pretty crazy.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: And then I can't remember the fourth one, but they're
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: all in a similar type of thing. And I actually
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: remember that time you taught me the meditation where we
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: did the guided meditation in my front yard and then
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: I just passed out. I don't know if you even
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: remember that you had a guided meditation. I didn't teach
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: you anything. It was a guided meditation that we listened to. Well,
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: you taught me. I never tried it before, But to
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: people listening, I thought meditation. I'm not even fucking talking,
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: and I don't think you can tell me to shout
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: up at this point, buddy, Well, I think, uh, the
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: meditation was a thing that Chelsea turned me onto that
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: felt too woo woo for me. I Um, I have
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: a real tricky time, like I hate like yoga class,
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: I like stretching, but anything that feels to woo woo,
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: that's what I thought the meditation was. But Chelsea's actually
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: taken me through two guided meditations and I fell asleep
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: both times. And I'm not a napper, So that that
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: shows to me that, uh, it's probably something worth exploring. Yeah. Well,
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: and I mean when you're focusing on your breath, you know,
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: some people say that meditation is really just focusing on
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: yourself and focusing on your breath. So in a way,
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: like you're doing your own form of meditation where you're
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: doing this box breathing or these you know, these other
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: types of breathing techniques. The breathing stuff actually works better
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: for me than just trying to meditate, because it could
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: just be me, but I doubt it. It's really hard
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: to just be told clear your mind for ten or
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: twenty minutes, because all I do is just think about
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: all the ship that's been bothering me. So I think
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: the breathing stuff is good for me in the sense
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: that I don't go blank minded. I'm counting the whole time,
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: so my mind can't wander. Yeah, it gives you something
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: to focus on. Yeah, I bet you. With all your
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: breathing though, now you would be able to meditate more
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: easily because the meditation is just focusing on your breathing,
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: because it is a meditative thing anyway. So are you
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: ready to give some advice to callers? People call in
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: ask for real life advice, and then we have to
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: give them good advice. This feels like the blind leading
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: the blind. Well, we're gonna take a quick break and
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: we will be right back to answer some questions and
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: we're back fantastic. Well, you know what, We're gonna do
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: things a little bit differently today because this is training
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: focused and health focused. We've got a lot of sort
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: of like quick little bite questions. So are you going
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: to be able to answer a questions to sent way
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: or are you going to ramble on and on and
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: on on? All right, let's hear the questions. We have
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: something to ramble on a little bit later. We have
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: some really good callers calling in, but we'll just start
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: with some little quickies. So our first question is resistance
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: training using one's own body for weight training a k A.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: Plank pull ups, push ups, etcetera. Just as efficient and
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: beneficial as lifting weights. Joe. Joe, Yes to a point.
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: I think in the beginning it's great, but I think
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: as you acclimate to your own body weight, it's really
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: good to add a little bit more resistance. And we
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: we follow a tendant in training. It's called progressive overload,
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: basically meaning like you want to gradually make things harder.
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: So unless you just kept adding body weight, which I
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: don't think many people want to do, you're going to
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: run out of ways to progressively overload. Got it? I agree?
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: Chelsea concurs. Hi, Chelsea and Ben. My name is Abby.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: I followed that on Instagram, and I'm curious if he's
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: still single. I wanted some he's got to live in girlfriend?
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: That was quick? Sorry, Abby, I wanted some advice on
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: how to get motivated for the gym. I used to
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: go every day in between shifts at work. I now
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: find myself struggling for motivation to go even once a week. Chelsea,
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: You're in insane shape, so maybe you could chime in
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: on this too. PS. I'm twenties six years old, Abbey
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: bed Why don't you take the lead on this one.
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: I don't know the question in that it sounds like
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: she was just explaining her situation. Yeah, I think the
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: question is how to get motivated for the gym. To me,
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: something that is interesting to note is that like she
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: was maybe doing like a shift at are going to
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: the gym and then doing another shift at work, which
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: like you can do when you're like but she may
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: have just been sort of overworking herself in general. Yeah,
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like that my motivation is looking good,
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: so I just feel more like mentally normal and clearheaded
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: when I am feeling good and looking good, and I
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: like to be strong. I was on vacation for two
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: weeks recently, and I didn't work out for two weeks,
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: and that was probably the first time in like two
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: weeks I've never worked out first time in two weeks,
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: the first time that I didn't work out for the
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: duration of two weeks, you know, like I'll always work
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: out so and shut the funk up, just trying to
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: help the people that made no and I didn't like
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: it because my ass melted. And then I got back
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: and I worked out for like a week. I did
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: pilates for a week. But like, as soon as you
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: start working out and seeing the results, I think that's
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: really it. Once you start to see the results, it
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: becomes kind of addicting. I will say, personally, I'm not
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: the type of trainer that just lives to work out.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: I'm not somebody that works out every day. I usually
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: strength train three days a week, and then on other
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: days I try. I try to be active every day,
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: but I get sick of my own workouts. I've I've
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: been I've been training people for fifteen years, and I'm
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: just kind of you know, I spend my whole day
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: in the gym. So what I do when I'm not
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: feeling motivated, because I definitely have weeks where I won't
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: do the weights, is I just make appointments with friends
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: to hold myself accountable. You know, a lot of a
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: lot of my clients probably a big part of it.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: It's just built in accountability. But if you don't have
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: a trainer, you can create that same accountability by just
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: making appointments with friends. There's a lot of times that
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: I'll make an appointment on a Monday with my buddies
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: for Tuesday, and I think to myself as they're driving over, man,
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: if they if they cancel, like I'm skipping. So it's
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: like it's a really good way I think for me
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: to to stick to it. That's great. Next question, My
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: question for Bruno is why don't you like burpes? I
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: hate them. To Wendy Man, I don't even know why
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: this is controversial. When I say I don't like burpies,
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: all these like really jacked CrossFit guys get mad at me.
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: But I'm not talking about for them. They can do
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: whatever they want, but a lot of just normal people
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: that don't live to work out think that that's the
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: way that they're gonna lose weight. But burpies are actually
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: I call them advanced exercise masquerading as a beginner exercise.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: It's actually pretty hard to do correctly and requires a
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: lot of mobility. So if you just passed a normal
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: workout class. I would call myself captain obvious if you
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: went past a normal class. Almost everyone's that does burpies
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: sucks at them like jack. Guys are the ones that
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: fight me on it, but they don't even do them.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: It's always like beginners, and it requires a lot of
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: mobility and a lot of people hurt their back, risks, knees,
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: etcetera doing that, etcetera. Uh, and could easily just get
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: their heart rate up through safer means. Yeah, it seems
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: like something that is very easy to do with poor form,
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: which can lead to getting hurt. So I just a
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: simple way. I just say break it down into its
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: two constituent parts and do push ups and squads separate
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: but don't combine. I was had a trainer. I think
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: this was I used Chloe Kardashians trainer for a short
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: period of time, probably before I met you, Ben, and
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: I remember in the middle I remember, I remember we
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: broke up a couple of times. No, we didn't, we didn't. Anyway,
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: I think he made me do a burbie. If I'm
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: thinking correctly about what burpies are, which is when you
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: run up and down the floor right like jump off
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: like do like a belly flop. Yeah, And I as
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: soon as I saw that, I was like, I can't
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: do that. Not because I don't think the burpies work,
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: It's just because they're too hard. It's too annoying to
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: jump up and down like that. I'm not into jumping period. Well,
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: our next question is make sure we asked Ben some
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: real life questions to not just fitness. We shouldn't let
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: him get off easy today. Okay, Well we'll have a
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: couple more quickies and then we'll get to some serious stuff. Okay, great,
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: I'm like twelve. I always laugh when I hear quickie.
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: Oh God, that's what I'm dealing with everybody like a
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: fucking eighth grader. Well, that fits right in with our
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: next question, because our next question is I always have
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: pain in my hips when I have sex and missionary position.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: I'm in the gym four times a week, and I
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: have done a lot of hip mobility work on my
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: hip flexers, but it hasn't fixed the problem. Any suggestions
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: on specific exercises or stretches I could try. I like
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: it from behind, so it's not the end of the world.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: But variation is the spice of Life. Thanks Jess. That's
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: I'm glad you covered that, Jess, because Ben was going
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: to say, take it from behind. That's exactly what you
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: were going to say. I was thinking it, I wasn't
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: gonna say it. I would say, First off, I'm curious,
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: like what exactly she means when she says missionary, because
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: I don't know how your hips could hurt, just like
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: lying flat. But I think if if her legs are up,
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: you know, around whatever, I would say that she probably
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: could be doing some Yeah. I mean, now, sorry, I'm
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: just visualizing your legs and then your hips are in. Off,
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: you don't just lie there like a stick figure. Some do.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: But there's you know, there's some there's some clarifications I need.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: But in general, I would tell her to do the
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: pigeon stretch. That would be a good one. And yeah,
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: and then if she wants to google or YouTube or
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: whatever Stationary spider Man's that's a really good bang for
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: your book, Mobility Drill. I don't hate that joke. I
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: don't hate that my best I can't even say anything
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: right now, Chelsea. We have a quick call from a
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: friend of yours. Rosanna is calling perfect. She had a
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: question for you, says My question for Ben would be
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: how to make my calves smaller? They are enormous. Thanks Rosanna,
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: that is a really tricky one. She already asked me,
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: and I gave her what my feedback, which was, well,
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: I'll wait for your feedback. Oh my god, look who
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: it is is, Hi Hi. Oh my god, what a valiant.
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: I love it. I'm in my pink palace. Rosanna is
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: one of my friends who I just went to Vancouver
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: Island with. I told them earlier about falling asleep, or
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: maybe it was in another episode about falling asleep at
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: three in the afternoon and then waking up at three am. Rosanna.
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: We had a great time. Chuck spent a lot of
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: the week sleeping and we watched Your Sleep. I brought
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: her what she needed in between getting drunk in the
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: hotel bar. It was a good week. Yeah, we didn't
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: make it very far, but Rosanna made various reservations all
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: throughout town every night, like six or seven different places
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: for lunch and dinner, and then we would just cancel
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: all of them and activities too. We also canceled a
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: lot of activities, but we didn't need him Okay, so
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: this is Ben Bruno, this is my trend, or you're
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: finally needed Rosanna tell him about your situation. I have
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: a situation. I have the opposite situation that most people have.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: I don't need to build up my calves. I need
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: to reduce my calves. Their massive. They are not calves,
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: They're full grown cows. So I just would like to
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: be able to fit into boots. You really are you
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: also recently lost weight? Right? How much weight have you lost?
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: I'm not really quite sure, but I've definitely I've definitely
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: lost them weight, and I've been heavier, I've been smaller,
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: but no matter what, my calves are still so muscular.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: My legs in general are muscular, but my calves especially,
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: I mean, Chelsea can tell you. We were in Victoria's.
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: She was like, damn girl, those are sound cats. So
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: I don't know if there's something I can do to
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: lean them out. Wait, let me ask him one question.
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: Did you notice that they reduced in size when you
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: lost weight a little bit? Yeah, for sure, that's really
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: the best thing you can do. Unfortunately, for both people
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: that have small calves and big calves, calves are just
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: some people have big calves genetically, some have teeny ones
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: and more so than almost any other muscle. It's hard
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: to change that. But I would say losing weight all
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: over will definitely help you lose girth in your calves,
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: but also doing things like calphrases to get them to
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: shrink won't have that effect. So I would say, like,
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: don't do anything other than you know, maybe lose weight,
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: and also just know that it's one of those grass
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: is Greener things. You probably think. It's way more negative
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: than most people. I get far more questions about how
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: to grow calves and like, like me, for example, I
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: have teeny calves, to the point that if I ever
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: share a video of myself doing pull ups on YouTube,
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: the trolls tell me I'm cheating because my calves are
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: so small that I have nothing to pull up. So
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: just no rosetta there is. Yeah, it's just I bet
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: I bet people just yeah right, Well, she used the
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: calves the cows. That's cheesy Jim humor too, so we're
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: even up. No calves the cows is the title of
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: every like cheesy internet calf article like how to turn
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: your calvestack cows. So but yeah, I would say, first off,
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: congrats on losing the weight, But I would say as
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: you do that more in your body acclimates and stuff,
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: they'll probably come down a little bit. Okay, So I
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: mean I take classes and stuff, and sometimes when they'll
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: do the calfhrases and calf exercise, just set that one
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: out and do the yoga shivasana and just lay there
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: while they do the cal phrases. What about Pilate's like, well,
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: that helped lengthen them out. No. So, actually that's a
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: tricky one for me to broach because a lot of
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: women that do pilates tell me that they want to
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: get long and lean. It's actually impossible. Your muscles insertion
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: points are set so you actually can't lengthen a muscle.
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: When when when women say that, I just kind of
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: nod because I know what they mean. But that's actually
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: not happening. You can't lengthen a muscle. It's it is
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: what it is, your anatomy. But I think you can
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: tone the muscle and stuff like that. But I think
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: a lot of what you're talking about will is just
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: more about like weight loss and fat loss. Got it.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: But I do think pilates does help you be more
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: conscientious of your posture and your alignment. So just by
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: nature of doing it, you stand up a little bit
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: taller and your posture is a little bit better, and
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: that always makes everything also look better. Yeah, I actually
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: love pilates. I didn't mean that to say I don't
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: like pilates. I love it. I do it myself sometimes.
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: But I think that it's a misnomer to say that
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: you're lengthening things. But I do think that you're there's
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: a ton of benefits to it. Okay, so my calves
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: are what they are, more or less unfortunately. Okay, I
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: want you to take that into the weekend, Rosanna, exactly energy.
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: You can take that big calf energy into the weekend.
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: It was very nice meeting, like it's your last. It
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: was nice to meet you too. Thanks for calling Rosanna
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: your problem. I'll talk to you later. Chuck, that was funny.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: She's cute. They all call me Chuck. I love that.
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: It's very I don't know, actually just a mystery. While
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: this is a very interesting gym and relationship related question,
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: it's a little long. I cut it down to about
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: a third of its original linkage. She's a writer by trade,
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: but just be prepared Dear Chelsea. I'm a twenty six
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: year old grad student in a relationship with my partner,
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: we'll call him Dan, who's thirty one. We've been together
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: for five years now, and it's been the most stable
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: and loving relationship I've ever had. I've always been very
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: skeptical of marriage, but in this relationship, I'm open to
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: the idea, and we've been recently talking about getting engaged.
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: Then something happened that has me questioning everything. Within the
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: last few months, Dan has started a fitness journey cringe.
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: I also hate that Word has been going to the
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: gym with a personal trainer. It's all he talks about anymore,
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: and I've often found him standing in the mirror flexing
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: his arm muggles, which kind of makes me want to hurl.
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: But I know he has had some insecurities about his
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: appearance in the past, and I'm proud of him and
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: the work he's been doing to feel good about himself
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: and his body. When he started getting very into his
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: gym life, I noticed that our intimacy was decreasing. There
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: was an obvious shift. When I would bring it up,
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: he'd brush it off, saying he was tired and deny
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: my advances. One night, when I was met with this response,
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: I had had enough. When I asked him what was
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: going on, he paused, said he didn't want to hurt me,
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: and eventually told me, you've gained a lot of weight
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: in the last six months, and it's made me less interested.
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: I guess I was crushed. I'm a healthy weight and
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: I love my body. I work out five days a
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: week at home, walk often, and eat well. I know
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: I've gained a little weight, and I just accepted it
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: as part of becoming an adult. I'm aware that I
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: won't be the scrawny, hundred and ten pound girl he
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: five years ago, forever just a sex. By the way,
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: if this person is distancing himself from me due to
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: a few pounds of weight gain, are the foundations of
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: our relationships strong enough to handle the really hard things together.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: I can't get the comment out of my head. I
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: went to stay with friends, and when I returned home,
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: my boyfriend apologized endlessly. However, it all just feels like
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: damage control. I fell in love with him because he
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: was a kind, thoughtful, smart and loving intellectual book nerd.
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: Now he's starting to feel like a conceited Jim rat.
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: Should I try to work through this incident or hit
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: the road. My love for him is not based on appearance,
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: but this comment is making me question if he can
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: love me the same way. Amy, Hi, Amy, Hi, how
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: are you? Hi? Ben Bruno is our guest today. Hi,
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: nice to meet you. That must have been an unpleasant
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: conversation to have. It was, it was. It shocked me
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: a little bit, but yeah, I decided to come back
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: home and work it out. But not much has really changed,
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: especially on his part. Still kind of obsessive with the
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: working out, a lot of damage control, like saying, you know,
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: I didn't mean what I said this and that, and
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: it's like, okay, then why did you say it? And
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: it's just been really confusing. Did you leave for a
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: period of time? I did, Yeah, about a week, just
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: to like get my mind off of things and hang
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: out with some friends. But yeah, it's just been it's
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: been hard to wout my head around. Yeah, that's a
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: pretty dicky thing for him to have said to you.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: And also like the whole obsessive working out, Like you
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: could forgive that, but those two things together now you're
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: piling on unattractive qualities. It's not a left field too.
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: This is not like him. So within like the past
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: two months, this obsession has started and has changed the
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: way like he treats me and how he feels about
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: himself as well. You know, we were at the beach
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: the other weekend and I saw these growy guys that
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: were like very muscular playing a game or whatever, and
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: he looked over at them and looked out at himself,
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: not really good about himself. So I'm trying to decide, like,
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: are you saying these comments because you don't feel good
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: about yourself? Or is this I don't know, it's it's
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: just been so confusing. Yeah, I mean I think it's
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: worth a longer conversation about it, where you sit down
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: and be like, listen, this is like a big red
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: flag to me, like, not only are you behaving in
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: a way that seems obsessive, now you're attacking me. These
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: are not qualities. I'm looking for to have a larger
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: conversation about that and what that sets up for any
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: future together. Right, you should call him out. What do
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: you think, ben Well? Has he gone from non worker
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: outer to like a full Jim Douche, like a full
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: transformation kind of thing. Yeah, it's kind of been like
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: I work out and stuff, but it's not all I
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: talked about, Like it's just like a part of your routine,
• 40:53
  Speaker 1: like being healthy, a part of your regime. Yes, regime, Yeah,
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: the full on gym culture. Does he do like the
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: weird eating habits and like this ship like that too?
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: Not really. Definitely has cut down on alcohol, which that's fine,
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: and definitely from working out at home to going to
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: a gym where he has like a personal trainer and
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: things like that. And maybe he's like looking at other
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: people's bodies that are super jocked. I don't know. I'm
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: just trying to figure out when this is coming from.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: But it could be just like the new environment of
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: where he's working out. I don't know. Well, I think
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: a lot of workout dudes. It's hard for me to
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: say without knowing him, but a lot of workout dudes
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: have this. They call it body dysmorphia. But I think
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: about themselves, and then I think they put that on
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: to other people too. So I'll have trainer friends that
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: are big dudes, you know. As reference, I'm five nine,
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: about a hundred seventy pounds to some people, I'm big
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: to some people, I'm small, But there's a lot of
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: trainer dudes that are huge by all standards, and they
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: talk about how they're insecure because they lose eyes and stuff,
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: and I look at them, like, what are you talking
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: about you? And then I think they also put I
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: don't know what the word would be, but they have
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: unrealistic expectations of what other people look like and things
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: like that. But I think if he's going like full Jim,
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to say douche, but douche,
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: then I think he could be in that mindset where
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: And I think also a lot of dudes get a
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: superiority when they lift, you know. I remember when I
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: moved to l A and started training actors, a lot
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: of my Jim Rat friends would ask me what some
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: of these famous guys like benched and squat and stuff,
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: and when I would tell them the number, they would
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: be like pussy, like they were better than them. And
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: I'm like, this dude has you beat in every facet
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: of life, and you're acting like you're better than him.
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: But Jim, people are really like that sometimes, and I
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: think that a lot of guys when they lift, get
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: an arrogance about that. But as it relates to you.
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: I don't know. It's hard for me to say, but
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: I think it's like super shitty that he's putting you
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: in that spot. And I also wonder if he's expecting
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: you to do all that weird stuff too, which would
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: be dumb. I don't think you should. That's pressure should
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: be placed on you. I will say again, I'm a trainer.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: I'm not somebody. I have very few trainer friends because
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: I'm not somebody that likes to work out every day.
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: If I have a buddy that tells me that, you know,
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: he does like chest on Monday back on Wednesday, I'm like, Okay,
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: we're probably never gonna be friends that type of thing.
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: But I think it's very healthy to work out in moderation.
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: But I think when you take it too far, it
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: can be unhealthy for your body and your mindset. You
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: definitely have to talk to him. And you said he's
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: like flexing in the mirror. This might be like addition
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: by subtraction. If it doesn't end up working out, that's tricky. Great, Yeah,
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: it feels like this may be an opportunity to encourage
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: him to get into therapy. This doesn't even feel like
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: a couple of therapy situation, but like he needs to
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: examine why he is turning this self hate rid of
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: his own body and his own fat or whatever on you.
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: So this might be a time to encourage him to
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: be like why don't why don't you explore that with
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: somebody and what's coming up for you with that? M Yeah,
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: So he started going to therapy and then we did
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: have a longer conversation about this whole topic, and he
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: like blamed it on seeing unrealistic body expectations, like both
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: in the gym and on social media. And for me,
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: I'm like, as a female, like that should I deal
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: with every day? Like we all, so you'll put it
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: on me, like, this isn't my problem, you know, it's
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: his ship. I think that's a really really good point.
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: And first of all, even if you have gained a
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: little bit of weight, like you're still a very slender person,
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: and even if you weren't, it wouldn't matter. It shouldn't
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: matter to him what you weigh. He's having some sort
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: of a physical mental reaction to whatever he's going through,
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: and that's that's something he's got to kind of unpack
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: on his own. Yeah, I guess My question knows do
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: I stick around for that and how do I move
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: forward with trust? I don't really trust you now, Like
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: I don't really feel like I even know you anymore,
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: Like you've changed in two months, like drastically, and not
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: even his body, just like his perginality and what he's
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: doing his actions. So yeah, I mean, if there's an
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: opportunity for you to go to therapy with him and
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: talk to his therapist with him, I would take that
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: opportunity really yeah, and just say like, this is what
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: I'm seeing. This is a different person than I, and
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: I'm concerned, Like it's a little bit fanatical, and it's
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: also having a negative impact on me. It's hard for
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: something to be happy for somebody to encourage them when
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: it's coming right back at you. He should be happy
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: about his body. What's he focused on you for. I
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: definitely think you have to press him a little more
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: on what he meant by what he said and things,
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: because I think it sounds like he backtracked. And I
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: just know as a dude, sometimes if I say something
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: that doesn't get a good reaction, I just retreat and
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: then just go like, hey, I don't mean that, Like
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: all good. But whether there's smoke, there's fire. So I
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: think you have to really understand where he's coming from
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: and then you can evaluate if it's something you can
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: get past or not. But I think the retreat thing
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: would probably be because he saw that he piste you
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: off and hurt your feelings and doesn't want to keep
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: that going. But the feelings are still there, so even
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: if you just sweep it under the rug, that's it's
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: going to come back if you don't really talk about
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: that a little bit more. Yeah, that's kind of like
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: where I met as how to move forward with us
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: and whether it's worth it or not. Um, how long
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: have you guys been together? Five years? So it's kind
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: of gone to the point where like things are getting
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: very serious and I've never been like a marriage person
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: or kids person, and like we've talked about these things,
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: but I've been more open about them. And then this
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: comment came up and it like really was triggering for me,
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: just like my past and everything. And so it's just, yeah,
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: trying to trying to figure out what to do next.
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: But I would agree that a deeper conversation and possibly
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: therapy together would be guid Yeah, you should give it.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's five years is a long time to
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: be with somebody, So give it the amount of attention
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: it deserves and the respect it requires. And if there's
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: not a change, then you know you have your answer
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: and you're going to move on right right, Okay, well,
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: thank you, all right? Well keep us supposed to a me. Okay, Well,
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: I will thank you so much. Ye see this is
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: serious ship ben yeh. Well, our next color is Alicia.
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: Alicia says, I'm fifty three and I'm in perimenopause. I've
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: begun reading some things about how women my age should
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: focus on strength training and do less high intensity interval
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: training or high impact cardio. When we talked on the phone,
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: she said, just kind of always been a cardio person.
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: If I can work out four days a week, what
• 47:59
  Speaker 1: would you suggest as a training schedule, he asked. My
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: current back to school routine is Monday, I do cardio strength,
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: Wednesday triple met con all cardio but at different levels.
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: Saturday cardio strength where I'm mix in some weights. Sunday
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: strength all weights. Alicia. Hello, oh shitsky doodle, Hi Alicia, Hi, Alicia, Hi,
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: I have been Bruno my trainer here a perfect time
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: for your question. Yes, I was excited to see that
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: you're looking for questions. I'm at the age where I'm
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: starting to read and learn about menopause, and I really
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: like to work out, and I've been reading and hearing
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: about that women my age should be focusing more on
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: strength training. And I grew up doing so much cardio
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: all the time. So what do I need to be
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: doing well? Question? You said that, but then when Catherine
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: was reading your schedule, it sounded like you did three
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: days of strength training in one day at cardio. Monday's
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: and Saturday's are a mix of cardio and strength. Classify
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: that as a whole strength class. Well, what I'll say
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: I always recommend I tell women to think of strength
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: training as the entree and cardio is the side dish,
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: so they're both important. But if we had to allocate percentages,
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: I would probably say two thirds to three quarters strength training,
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: one third to one quarter cardio. But I don't think
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: that you have to have a strength day only cardio
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: day only. What will typically do is just incorporate a
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: little bit of cardio at the end of the strength workouts. Um,
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: it's just you know, some intervals and stuff. But I
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: would say for you, three full body strength workouts a
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: week is great, and then if you enjoy cardio on
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: top of that, do it. And also I do agree,
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: sounds like you answered your own question in the question,
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: but you were talking about trying to not do as
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: much high impact cardio. I do think that first off,
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: strength training, if you do full body strength training is cardio.
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: People that do body parts splits, not so much if
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: you do like a chest day or whatever. But if
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: you're pairing upper body and lower body exercises, you're gonna
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: get a cardio effect from that too. But I think
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: it's great to supplement the full body strength work with
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: some low impact interval training. And then also it's just
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: some low intensity training like going for a walk or
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: a hike or things like that. But I think that's
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: like a good long term strategy. And then also incorporating
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: mobility work in there too. Yes, that's that's built into
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: a couple of the classes my training. The best part
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: of this whole COVID thing is I found this trainer.
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: Sounds like a good trainer. Yeah, so it sounds like
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: I'm kind of on the right road. Need to make
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: sure I get the strength in on on the weekend
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: because she does that on the days I go to work,
• 50:55
  Speaker 1: So all right, I will keep at that. Cool. Yeah,
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: don't over you the cardio. Yeah, it's hard though, I know,
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: I know it feels like it's good, but it's better
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: to strength train. Yes, yeah, okay, okay. It's been so
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: fun to talk with you. Thank you so much for
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: taking my question. Thank you, nice to meet you. Bye bye.
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: All right, well, our next question comes from Kim. Kim
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: is forty nine. Dear Chelsea, I'm really struggling with my fitness.
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: I started putting on tons of weight about ten years ago.
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: After a round of Whole thirty, I knew something was wrong,
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: and after several doctors, I was diagnosed with celias and
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: Hashimoto's thyroiditis. I went gluten free, obviously, and soy free,
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: another allergy I discovered and started to feel so much better.
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: Work relocated me to Florida. I'm a private teacher slash
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: family assistant, and it was great for the health part
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: because I would just ride my cruiser bike around the
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: horse farms for ten to twenty miles a day, taking
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: in the canal els in the sunsets. The weight seemed
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: to fall off. I move a lot with this job,
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: and my location and level of activity during work and
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: time spent outside seems to vary, as has my weight.
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: Now that you have my back story, I'd like to
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: ask for your help in mindset. I've always been one
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: to just do fun activities my whole life and not
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: think of it as exercise. I just recently signed up
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: for an adult tap class here in my current location,
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: and I hiked at my last location. I'd love if
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: you had tips to help me develop a traditional workout mindset,
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: whether at home or going to the gym. Kim, oh, hey, Kim, Hi, Hi,
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: I'm well, how are you good? Thank you. Ben Bruno's
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: our guest today, so it's perfect timing for your question. Yes,
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry. He's our in studio health expert today. So
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: is your question more related to the fitness side or
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: the diet side. Well, I have the diet side pretty
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: well nailed. I know how I have to eat to
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: feel good, and that's you know what I do. But
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: I just have a hard time getting in the mindset
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: of like going to the gym and doing typical workouts.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: I like to be active. I ride my bike, I hike.
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: I just started TAP lessons. I know, if I'm moving
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: with my I have hashes and ciliac. So if I
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: move like three or four hours a day, I'm great.
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: But sometimes it's really hard, and I just feel like
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: I need to somehow incorporate going to a gym and
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: not looking at it as a torture chamber. Can you
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: do it with a friend? Will that help you? To
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: enlist a friend that you like. Go to a class
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: two days a week, if it's a bar method or
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: soul cycle anything. I mean, I guess I have a few.
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: I just relocated to Nashville, so I know a couple
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: of people. Well that's a good way to make friends,
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: probably to actually yeah, so, and I've already become friendly
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: with people in my TAP class, so you know, hopefully
• 53:56
  Speaker 1: that'll progress. I have a partner who loves to bike ride.
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: He does that schimish emmy. Writing not my thing, but
• 54:02
  Speaker 1: you know, we do write a lot, so I'm lucky
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: to do that. But I just don't know why I
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: have such a It's like I have a wedge to
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: prevent me from going to the gym. You just have
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: to find some classes that you like in that are
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: in the gym. You know what I mean, and just
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: sign up for like two a week and commit to that.
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: That's a great way to aid work out and make friends.
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: And they could be strength training classes, you know what
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: I mean. So you know you're going and you're not
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: responsible for your own regiment. It's being provided for you,
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: right m h. I sort of feel Kim, like you
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: have the best of both worlds, you know. I think
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: that's what everybody wants to get to, is like just
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: doing something fun and it's exercise. By the way, It's
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: like that old saying, find a job you love and
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: you'll never work a day in your life. But I
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: feel like the same applies here, you'll never work out
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: a day in your life. Like I feel like you
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: got it great, Like Chelsea said, joining a couple of
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: extra classes. Maybe that's a strength training class or something
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: like that. But I think you've got a good mindset.
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: Oh well, thank you. Do you have anything to add, Ben,
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: I actually hate to say this, but I really like
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: what Chelsea had to say. But I would also add
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: that they have a lot of workout programs that you
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: can get that you can do at home. So if
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: you just have an aversion to the gym. There are
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: a lot of home workout programs, and I know a
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: lot of female trainers do stuff where the workout program
• 55:22
  Speaker 1: includes an online fitness community element like Facebook, book groups
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: and whatnot. So if you struggle with accountability, some of
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: those might be good. You do it and then you
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: report back to the trainer and the group. That's not
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: totally my thing, so I'm not I can't think of
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: any off the top of my head, but I know
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: they exist. I would also I want to plug my girlfriend.
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: She is Celiac. She has a whole thing. She's on
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: Instagram and has a blog called yeah at No Bread,
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: Um at No Bread, and it's like a website and
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: an Instagram handle that has she is an amazing cook,
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: but it's all glue and free stuff. Yeah, you should
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: follow her. She's got great recipes and great brands to
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: buy all of that stuff. Absolutely, I'm always looking for
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: new things. Yeah, but I would look at some of
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: the online The female trainers that do online programming do
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: a really great job of doing stuff to build a community.
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: If you just hate going to the gym, you can
• 56:20
  Speaker 1: check in with people online and whatnot. Yeah, I don't
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: even know. I guess I don't have an adversion going
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: to the gym. I just I guess maybe just to
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: get started and just not look at it as, oh,
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: let me go rund my bike. It's all fun, and
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: you know, I know when I do go, I feel good,
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: I have results. I just don't know what the mind blocking.
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: You just have to find a class you like and
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: then you're gonna be down with going. That's it. Just
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: find a class you like and go and do the
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: social aspect of it too. And if you don't like
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: going to the gym but you like the working out,
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: then do what you know and then get one of
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: those I mean, they're on peloton, they're on tonal. There's
• 56:55
  Speaker 1: all these types of things you can do at home.
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: But I hear what you're saying, but you just have
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: to like dive in and find the thing that you
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: like to do, and then you'll want to go to
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: the gym. One more thing, I want to add a
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: lot of people when they embark on strength training for
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: the first time, feel like they have to do this
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: whole crazy program and work out an hour at a time,
• 57:11
  Speaker 1: and it's totally fine. I would maybe start with like
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: fift twenty minute workouts, and just dip your toe in,
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: and I think as you get a little better at it,
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: you might like it more too. Okay, starting small amounts,
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: maybe that's my problem. I just feel like I have to. Well,
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: strength training is a thing that if you just come
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: in guns and blazing and go too hard, you're gonna
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: be sort of shipped. So I think, I sometimes think
• 57:34
  Speaker 1: and that's very de motivating. So I think that if
• 57:37
  Speaker 1: you start slowly and build progressively to kind of mitigate
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: that soreness and get used to it, it will help
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: you in the long term. Okay, great, thank you so much.
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: I will try both the online and just moving to
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: the gym and making it a social thing. Cool. Thanks
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: for calling in. Thank you bye. And on note, I
• 58:00
  Speaker 1: think I'm done talking about nutrition. Well let's take a
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: break so we can be done talking about that and
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: we'll be right back with Chelsea and Ben Bruno and
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: we're back. Excellent. Well, Bennett, that's point in the show.
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: We like to ask our guests if they would like
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: to ask Chelsea for some advice, be not really to
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: be honest with you. I mean, that's that's why I
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: go to therapy, so I don't have to ask people
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: at Chelsea for advice. Accept that. I feel like if
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: I asked Chelsea for advice, I would end up like
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: face down in a ditch somewhere. Then why hasn't that
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: already happened? Because I don't take what you say like,
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: I don't, I don't really interesting, I don't pay attention. Yeah, interesting, Well,
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: I think that means that Ben Bruno doesn't have any
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: questions for me, And you know what, I'm totally down
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: with that. I need the day off of answering questions.
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: What questions would I have for Chelsea? Well, why don't
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: you think I have a question? I do it. I
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: knew if you were me, how would you deal with
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: the client? Like you? Because I've struggled with this for
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: seven eight years, however long we've trained every single day.
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: I think like I don't know what to do in
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: this situation. I'm well, fire me if you if I
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: make you so, But like probably of the time you're pleasant, right,
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: So that's either this is the bed you made and
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: now you either have to lie in it, not lay
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: in it. You have to lie in it or fire me.
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: It's I mean, the ball is in your court. No,
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: I of the time, So you're not going to fire
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: the juice is worth the squeeze. No, I'm not okay,
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: So then there we go. Then what do you How
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: would you deal with me? I don't know what to
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: tell you. I wouldn't know how to deal with me either.
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: That that actually makes me feel good to hear. That
• 59:45
  Speaker 1: makes me. This is been big. This is a cathartic
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: podcast for me. It's been such a release bed. Where
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: can everybody find you? At the Kitchen. That's the name
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: of his gym at his house. It's called the kitchen
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: and his address is exactly don't say the address. Do
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: you have an it's you of Instagram, Ben Ben Bruno training,
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: Ben Bruno train er in one of training Bruno training
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: to research this really not really, that's the wrap up.
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: We're done, Catherine, We're done here. Good night. So if
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: you'd like advice from Chelsea, just send us an email
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: at Dear Chelsea project at gmail dot com. Dear Chelsea
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 1: is a production of I Heart Radio. Executive produced by
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 1: Nick Stump, produced by Katherine Law, and edited and engineered
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 1: by Brad Dickert.