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Young Men Communication · Let's Ask the Mamas!

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We got a question for American momas. Dear mamas, why
• 0:01
  Speaker 1: are young men having such a difficult time learning to communicate? Well,
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: let's ask our American mamas. Alma Enjoining us now are
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  Speaker 1: American mama's Terry Needville and Kimberly Burlison. You know, my
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  Speaker 1: son's in his early twenties. He's always been an introvert,
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: more of a reader than a speaker. But this is
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  Speaker 1: actually something he's worked on a lot in the last
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  Speaker 1: few years. He took a speech class in college, a
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  Speaker 1: communications class in college, and I think that kind of
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  Speaker 1: lit a fire under him to get better at public speaking.
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  Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean it is in it obviously, you
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  Speaker 1: know something that we've kind of I mean, with me
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  Speaker 1: as his dad, you're going to learn to communicate at
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  Speaker 1: least a little bit. But I do think there are
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  Speaker 1: a lot of young men that are that at this time,
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  Speaker 1: in this day and age, have a difficult time communicating.
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  Speaker 1: Why is that?
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  Speaker 2: Two.
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  Speaker 3: I had a conversation with my neighbor who is in
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  Speaker 3: sales for his business, and he said that he does
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  Speaker 3: business lunches almost every day, sure, and he said it's
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  Speaker 3: become torture. He said he is going to lunch with
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  Speaker 3: all of these different businessmen and they cannot carry conversations.
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  Speaker 3: And I said, well, how old are they and he said, well,
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  Speaker 3: usually it's the younger ones, twenties and thirties that are
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  Speaker 3: having the hardest time carrying a conversation. He said, I
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  Speaker 3: feel like I'm interviewing them. And then it made me
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  Speaker 3: think of that show Love on the Spectrum. There's a
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  Speaker 3: show there's a a girl in her named Abby who
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  Speaker 3: is has She's on the spectrum?
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  Speaker 1: Is this a streaming chymnel?
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  Speaker 2: It is?
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  Speaker 3: It's on Netflix, okay. And there's a therapist that's working
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  Speaker 3: with her and she sits on the floor. She places
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  Speaker 3: Abby on the floor and she throws a ball to
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  Speaker 3: her and she says, when you get the ball, I'm
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  Speaker 3: gonna ask you a question. And when the ball comes
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  Speaker 3: to you, you answer it. So Abby, She's like, how's
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  Speaker 3: your day good? And then Abby pushed the ball back
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  Speaker 3: and she said, no, you have to ask a question
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  Speaker 3: before you push it back. So I told my neighbor
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  Speaker 3: Iyes like, I wonder if what's going on is these
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  Speaker 3: are tablet kids. These are kids that have had their
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  Speaker 3: phones in front of them and so they don't know
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  Speaker 3: the art of communicating and is this something that should
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  Speaker 3: be taught again in our schools. You know, so you
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  Speaker 3: are teaching young kids those life skills that are going
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  Speaker 3: to help them later on.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, you've brought up the whole iPhone tablet community generation
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  Speaker 1: and I do think that's that's a big part of it.
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  Speaker 1: But the other part that confuses me is they're not
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  Speaker 1: good at texting either.
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  Speaker 2: That's true, that's true, you know.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, my daughter's dealing with this with some some
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  Speaker 1: boys that some that she's gone on dates with, some
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  Speaker 1: that are trying to go on dates with their and
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  Speaker 1: they're all awful at communicator. They are on text and
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  Speaker 1: when she says, I, you know what, I don't want
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  Speaker 1: to I don't want to have this conversation anymore, and
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  Speaker 1: they keep going, I'm like, who raised you?
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  Speaker 3: Yeah, well that's part of it, that is you can
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  Speaker 3: raise your children. We are raised with a parent that
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  Speaker 3: you know, we're about to walk into this party. You're
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  Speaker 3: gonna shake hands, You're gonna look them in the eye,
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  Speaker 3: don't touch anything, say thank you.
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  Speaker 2: You know.
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  Speaker 3: The other day we were out Lindsay.
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  Speaker 2: We had our.
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  Speaker 3: Lindsay's youngest We bumped into his old soccer coach. And
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  Speaker 3: he didn't react the way Lindsay felt he should. He
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  Speaker 3: should have shaken his hand. He didn't, he acted shy.
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  Speaker 3: Lindsay went off on him when we got in the car,
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  Speaker 3: like you never you should should have should shaken his hand,
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  Speaker 3: looked him in the eye and he was so upset.
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  Speaker 3: But I'm like, that's where it starts.
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  Speaker 1: You know, my father West Point graduate when Bailey, my
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  Speaker 1: son was a really young four or five. This was
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  Speaker 1: something my dad worked with as granddad with his grandson.
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  Speaker 1: He worked on all right, shake hands, look him in
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  Speaker 1: the eye. And it was a lesson that could come
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  Speaker 1: from a granddad, maybe easier than a lesson that could
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  Speaker 1: come from a dad, because Bailey's actually very good at
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  Speaker 1: that that he does shake hands, he does look you
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  Speaker 1: in the eye, and he stands, you know, with his
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  Speaker 1: shoulders back and all that. And I think it's because
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  Speaker 1: of those lessons that my dad was teaching me right
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  Speaker 1: when he was a young man, not even a young man,
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  Speaker 1: a young boy.
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  Speaker 2: Well, you're teaching interpersonal skills that are life skills that
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  Speaker 2: actually took a core this in college actually, but I remember,
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: and when you've done you and Lindsay and we've all
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  Speaker 2: done this with our children. We also would coach them
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  Speaker 2: and teach them how to respond at their birthday parties.
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  Speaker 2: Whenever they opened up a gift, even if it was
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  Speaker 2: something they already had, if it was something like like,
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  Speaker 2: we would coach them on how to respond. They would
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  Speaker 2: get nervous sometimes when they were a little but it
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  Speaker 2: helped so much. Also, you know, our kids went to
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  Speaker 2: steven and I had kids at a school Southfield. Here's report.
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  Speaker 2: Every single month they had those children in front of
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  Speaker 2: the class. They had to give oral reports, or they
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  Speaker 2: were in place, or they were doing anything and everything
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  Speaker 2: to get these kids in front of people. And my
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  Speaker 2: shy one or well she was shy when she was little.
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  Speaker 2: She credits that. She said, it really it forces you
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  Speaker 2: to get in front and you have to learn how
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  Speaker 2: and so small talk is not easy. You're exhausted after it.
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  Speaker 2: Most people would say, you know, Terry's you know, she's
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  Speaker 2: out going, she's a you know, she's an extrovert. I'm
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  Speaker 2: actually introvert. Extrovert where you have to work on it.
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  Speaker 2: Like if you put me in that situation, I can
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  Speaker 2: talk to anybody and everybody.
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  Speaker 1: But you're gonna need an app yes.
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  Speaker 2: Exactly afterwards, I need an app. But it is an
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  Speaker 2: art because being on the phone with somebody where you
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  Speaker 2: feel like you're having to interview them is the when
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  Speaker 2: someone calls you but then they don't have anything to say.
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  Speaker 2: So I feel sorry for your neighbor having to deal
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  Speaker 2: with these people. I think it does come down to
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  Speaker 2: the phones and tablets that have been placed in front
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  Speaker 2: of our eyes since or that generation, since they were little.
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  Speaker 2: You know, it was to keep them occupied, and.
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  Speaker 1: Then a lack of parenting saying you got you gotta
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  Speaker 1: shake hands, you got to talk, You have to look
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  Speaker 1: people in the eye, you have to show respect physically.
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  Speaker 2: I agree.
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  Speaker 1: If you like to ask our American Mama is a
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: question good Our website American ground ready dot com, slash
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: mamas and click on the ass the Mama's button. Terry
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  Speaker 1: out at Kimberly bre listening. Thank you so much, Thank you,