Latest / The Burnout Podcast with Fexingo: Workplace Exhaustion, Recovery, and Sustainable Careers / The Hidden Cost of Performance Theater
Transcript
- Lucas: There is a specific kind of exhaustion that doesn't come from doing hard things, but from performing them. It’s the feeling that you aren’t just managing your workload; you’re managing an audience. I’ve been thinking about this lately because the tools we use to work have become so good at broadcasting our activity that it’s easy to mistake visibility for value. Luna: Right, like the pressure to be seen online or in chat channels has replaced the need to actually be effective offline. You start curating your busyness. Lucas: Exactly. We call it performance theater. And the tragedy is that it’s not always malicious. Most people aren’t trying to trick their bosses. They’re just responding to a system that rewards loudness over quiet competence. When every Slack message, email reply, and calendar block becomes a data point for your manager, you stop working on the problem and start working on the proof of the problem. Luna: It creates this weird incentive structure where if you finish your work quickly and quietly, you look lazy, whereas if you struggle visibly for three days, you look dedicated. Lucas: That is the core of it. In knowledge work, difficulty is subjective. If I solve a complex coding bug in two hours without making a sound, my manager might think I didn’t try very hard. But if I post updates every hour saying I’m stuck, debugging, and researching, I get credit for the effort even if the outcome was simple. It’s a distortion of meritocracy. Luna: So we end up rewarding the actors rather than the engineers. The ones who know how to stage their struggle. Lucas: Precisely. And this isn’t new, but technology has supercharged it. Ten years ago, you had to physically stay late in the office to signal dedication. Now, you can be logged into Teams or Slack at nine PM on a Saturday, typing a thoughtful response to a non-urgent thread. That green dot is your new overtime badge. It signals availability, loyalty, and engagement, even if you’re just answering emails from your couch. Luna: And that green dot creates anxiety for everyone else. Everyone sees you’re online and wonders why they aren’t matching that energy. Lucas: It does. It creates a race to the bottom of rest. Because if the metric for success is visible activity, then resting becomes a risk. You start to feel guilty for disconnecting, even when you have nothing left to contribute. You’re trading your cognitive recovery for digital presence. And over time, that trade-off leads to that hollowed-out feeling of burnout, where you’ve done all the right moves but produced nothing of substance. Luna: I see this in my own network. People who are incredibly active on LinkedIn or internal forums but whose actual project deliverables are slipping because they’re too busy maintaining their personal brand at work. Lucas: Right. There’s a difference between building a reputation and putting on a show. Building a reputation takes time and consistent output. Putting on a show takes immediate, performative attention. And the latter is much faster to acquire, which makes it dangerously addictive for managers who are looking for quick signals of control. Luna: It feels like micromanagement by algorithm. The software tracks your keystrokes or your login times, and humans interpret that as productivity. Lucas: Yes, and it’s particularly bad in remote or hybrid settings. When you can’t see someone sitting at their desk, you crave proxies. You want to know they’re working. So you measure their responsiveness. But responsiveness is not the same as contribution. A person who responds instantly to every ping is often a person who cannot do deep work. They are trapped in reactive mode, and yet, they are often praised for being 'agile' or 'responsive.' Luna: So agility gets redefined as interruptibility. Being available becomes the job description rather than the means to an end. Lucas: Spot on. And this traps smart people. The best thinkers need long stretches of uninterrupted time to produce high-quality work. But if the culture values instant replies, those thinkers either leave, or they learn to fake it. They start leaving comments on old threads to stay visible, or they send 'thinking aloud' messages to justify their silence. They become actors in their own careers. Luna: It’s exhausting to watch. And worse, it’s exhausting to participate in. You know you should be focusing, but you’re checking your phone every five minutes because you don’t want to seem absent. Lucas: That is the invisible tax. It’s the mental load of monitoring your own visibility. You’re running two processes in your brain: one for solving the actual problem, and one for staging the evidence that you’re solving it. That dual processing drains your battery much faster than the work itself would. It’s cognitive multitasking at its worst. Luna: So how do you break that cycle? Because most of us don’t have the power to change company policy. We’re stuck in these systems. Lucas: You start by auditing your own behavior. Ask yourself: am I doing this because it helps the project, or because it helps my image? For example, if you’re writing a detailed update email to your boss, ask if that information is necessary for their decision-making. Or if it’s just for their reassurance. If it’s the latter, consider whether a shorter, briefer update would suffice. Luna: Curating the signal. Trying to give leaders what they need without giving them the whole circus. Lucas: Exactly. Try to shift the norm in your immediate circle. If you have a team, establish norms around async communication. Say, 'We don’t expect immediate responses after six PM.' Or, 'Let’s reserve Slack for urgent items and use email for deep discussions.' You can’t fix the whole company, but you can create a small pocket of sanity where output matters more than optics. Luna: It requires a bit of courage though. Because you might be the first one to stop replying instantly. You might get pushed back. Lucas: It does require courage. And you have to be prepared to explain your rationale. You’re not being difficult; you’re being efficient. You’re saying, 'I want to give you my best thinking, not my fastest typing.' Most reasonable managers will respect that, even if it feels risky in the moment. Luna: I think the real test is when you actually deliver great work quietly. Will it stick? Or will people forget you were there? Lucas: That’s the fear. But here’s the thing: sustainable careers are built on trust, not noise. If you consistently deliver high-quality work, your reputation will solidify. The initial phase might feel quieter, but once your track record is established, you won’t need to shout. Your results will speak for themselves, and you’ll have the energy left over to actually enjoy your life outside of work. Luna: So the goal is to become indispensable through quality, not volume. To be the person who solves problems, not the person who talks about them. Lucas: Precisely. And that distinction matters more now than ever. As AI tools make it easier to generate content and code, the value shifts to judgment and insight. Those things can’t be faked in a chat log. They require deep focus. So protecting your ability to do deep work becomes your most important career skill. Luna: It reframes burnout again. It’s not just about working too hard; it’s about working on the wrong thing. Performing instead of producing. Lucas: Yes. And recognizing that is the first step to fixing it. Once you see the theater, you can stop acting in it. You can step off the stage and go back to the workshop. It’s uncomfortable at first, but it’s the only way to build a career that lasts. Luna: If we've helped you rethink how you show up at work, remember that listener support keeps this show ad-free and independent. You can support us at buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo. Every contribution helps us keep digging into these stories. Lucas: Thanks for keeping us going. It really allows us to take the time to research these nuances properly. Luna: Yeah, it makes a huge difference. And it aligns with the idea of valuing substance over spectacle. Lucas: Right. So, back to the workplace dynamic. We’ve talked about stopping the performance, but what about the reward system? How do you negotiate for outcomes when your company measures activity? Luna: That’s the harder part. Because if the promotion criteria are tied to hours logged or messages sent, you’re fighting the system. Lucas: You are. And in that case, you have to decide if the trade-off is worth it. Some people choose to play the game for a few years to get the title or the money, then leave. Others try to change the game from within. But both choices require awareness. You can’t be naive about it. You need to know what you’re signing up for. Luna: So it’s a conscious choice between short-term gain and long-term sustainability. Knowing which one you’re prioritizing. Lucas: Exactly. And being honest with yourself about it. Don’t pretend you’re above the game if you’re playing it. Just understand the cost. Because every minute you spend performing is a minute you’re not spending on your craft, your family, or your rest. Luna: And eventually, the bill comes due. Either in burnout, or in stagnation. Lucas: Always. So the question for next week might be: what is the true cost of your current role, beyond the salary? Is it paying you in energy, or in exhaustion? Luna: A vital question to ask before you commit to another year of theater.