Latest / DA CREW Podcast / walking in purpose with Angela

Transcript

walking in purpose with Angela · DA CREW Podcast

• 0:51
  Speaker 1: When the lights go down, the real conversations begin. Welcome
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: to Basic Black after Dark, hosted by Black Diamond, where truth,
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: healing and growth takes center stage. This is the space
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: where mental health, family healing, and personal growth are talked
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: about honestly and without filters, featuring intimate interviews with authors
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  Speaker 1: and thought leaders who aren't afraid to share their journey
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  Speaker 1: because every story told reminds someone watching you are not alone.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: Basic Black after Dark now streaming on the Crew platform Tap.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: In, turn off the lights.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: Hey everybody, this is Black Diamond and you're listening to
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: Basic Black after Dark to show that meet you where
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: you are and gives you what you ask for Tonight,
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: I'm not talking about growth. I'm talking about the cost
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: and tonight I'm talking to you. Recently, I had to
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: sit down with a good friend, a real conversation, the
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  Speaker 3: kind of conversation we don't always have what we need to,
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: the kind you have with people who truly want to
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  Speaker 3: see you win. And it made me think, have you
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: ever outgrown a space, a person, or even a mindset
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: and feel guilty about it? If that's you? Drop growth
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  Speaker 3: in the comments, because I know somebody is outgrown something
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  Speaker 3: or someone, not because you think you're better, but because
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  Speaker 3: you're becoming different. Sometimes growth doesn't always look like elevation.
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: Sometimes it look like Separation is not always about getting bigger, higher,
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  Speaker 3: or moving faster. Sometimes it's quiet, Sometimes it's painful. Sometimes
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: it's the people, the spaces, or even the routines you've
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  Speaker 3: held onto, letting go of you before you even realize it.
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  Speaker 3: Growth can feel like walking away from comfort, even when
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  Speaker 3: comfort isn't serving you anymore. It can feel like standing
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  Speaker 3: alone in a room where everyone else is still sitting,
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  Speaker 3: still waiting, still holding on to what you've already outgrown.
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: And that's the part nobody rarely talks about, the part
• 4:02
  Speaker 3: where you feel both lost and liberation at the same time,
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: where you missed what was familiar, but you also sense
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  Speaker 3: that something bigger is waiting for you on the other side. Now,
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: we're gonna talk about a few points tonight, and I
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  Speaker 3: just want you to take some notes on these points.
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  Speaker 3: Point number one, Not everyone is meant for every season.
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  Speaker 3: Some people come into our lives for a reason, some
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: stay longer than what they were meant to. And sometimes
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  Speaker 3: we don't realize that we've outgrown something until it starts
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  Speaker 3: to feel uncomfortable. Sometimes it's not about who's right or wrong.
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: It's about recognizing when something no longer fits where you are.
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: Point number two. Change can feel uncomfortable for you and others.
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  Speaker 3: You start thinking differently, you start moving differently, and not
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  Speaker 3: because everyone knows how to adjust or that version of you.
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: Some people just don't know that you've made that change.
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: When you begin to change, it can feel like things
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  Speaker 3: around you are shifting. Because they are things around you shifting,
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  Speaker 3: you just don't even know. Sometimes you don't know that
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  Speaker 3: they're shifting, but some people see them before you do.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: Point number three Guilt. Guilt will try to keep you
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: where you've outgrown. You don't want to hurt people. You
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: don't want to seem different, so you shrink. You just
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: stay connected. That's how some people do it. Just to
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: stay connected, they shrink. Sometimes we stay in places longer
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  Speaker 3: than we should, not out of love, but out of guilt.
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  Speaker 3: Think about it. Have you stayed in places long than
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  Speaker 3: you should have out of guilt just to make other
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  Speaker 3: people happy? Point number four. Your needs will change, and
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  Speaker 3: that's okay. What worked before may not work now. What
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  Speaker 3: you tolerated before may not sit right with anyone may
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  Speaker 3: not sit right with anyone anymore. That doesn't make you difficult,
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  Speaker 3: It makes you aware. You're not asking for too much.
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  Speaker 3: You're just no longer accepting too little from anyone or anything. Now,
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  Speaker 3: I want to hear from you. What's something that you've
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  Speaker 3: outgrown recently, A habit, a space, or even a relationship
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  Speaker 3: that was harder to leave than your thoughts. Drop your
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  Speaker 3: word or short sentence in the comments. I want to
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  Speaker 3: see how we're all growing together. Hey, Alma, thank you
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  Speaker 3: so much for joining. Some people they just don't know
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  Speaker 3: where to begin. They don't know if they've grown. Some
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  Speaker 3: people may feel as though nobody else is care. But
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  Speaker 3: point number five, you can care and still create the space.
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  Speaker 3: Caring doesn't always mean closeness. Distance doesn't always mean this connection.
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  Speaker 3: Sometimes space is necessary. Sometimes you need that space just
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  Speaker 3: to keep yourself connected with yourself. You can love people
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  Speaker 3: and still recognize you need something different. Point number six,
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  Speaker 3: You don't have to explain every shift. Not everyone will understand.
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  Speaker 3: Not everyone is meant to, and that's okay. Sometimes the
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  Speaker 3: healthiest thing you can do is move forward with out
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  Speaker 3: explaining every step. Sometimes when you start to explain those steps,
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  Speaker 3: it can become confusing. It can turn into something that
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  Speaker 3: you may not have wanted to turn into, and then
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  Speaker 3: there's disappointment. Point number seven. You're allowed to grow even
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  Speaker 3: if it changes things. Growth doesn't always feel good. It
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  Speaker 3: doesn't always look clean, but it's necessary. Growth doesn't always
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  Speaker 3: feel like progress. Sometimes it feels like loss before it
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  Speaker 3: feels like clarity. Sometimes some people take a hard hit
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  Speaker 3: with it because they're thinking that they're moving too quick,
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  Speaker 3: or maybe they're not moving fast enough. Point number eight elevation.
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  Speaker 3: Elevation requires decision, not emotion. People is still outgrowthm Some
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: people say that you can love somebody from a distance.
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  Speaker 3: Feelings can't lead your direction. Distance and discipline will take
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  Speaker 3: you where emotions won't. Some people get so emotional over
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  Speaker 3: growth because it's a strange feeling. It's something that they're
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  Speaker 3: not used to, something they may have wanted. But sometimes
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  Speaker 3: when you ask for things and you get them, you're
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  Speaker 3: just not prepared for them. But growth can be a
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  Speaker 3: very good thing for people. Just because it hurt, it
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  Speaker 3: doesn't mean that it's wrong. Point number nine. Silence is
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  Speaker 3: part of the progress. You don't have to announce every
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  Speaker 3: shift that you made. Not everyone needs to know every
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  Speaker 3: move that you need or every move needs to be validated.
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  Speaker 3: You don't need validation for people in order to grow.
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  Speaker 3: So often happens quietly. But you that's sitting there right now.
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  Speaker 3: You're growing, whether you realize it or not. And I'm
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  Speaker 3: not talking about growing in height. You're growing and the
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  Speaker 3: things that you do and the things that you plan
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  Speaker 3: and the things that you want to do. Some of
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  Speaker 3: your biggest moves will happen in silence. Not an explanation.
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  Speaker 3: Point number ten. You have to be willing to walk alone,
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  Speaker 3: not lonely, but aligned, not abandoned but positioned, not rejected
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  Speaker 3: but redirected. Sometimes the only confirmation you'll get is your
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  Speaker 3: own conviction, because everybody can't go where you're going. And
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  Speaker 3: as soon as you accept that, the light of your
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  Speaker 3: journey becomes You're not losing people, you're losing weight. You
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  Speaker 3: were never meant to care so tonight. If anything I
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: said touched you, if anything made you uncomfortable, that wasn't
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  Speaker 3: my intent at all. And if anything made you think,
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  Speaker 3: sit with that. Don't rush to fix it, don't rush
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  Speaker 3: to explain it. Just sit with it. Because growth isn't
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  Speaker 3: always loud. Sometimes it's quiet. Sometimes it's lonely. Sometimes it
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  Speaker 3: asks you to let go of what you thought would
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  Speaker 3: always be there. But hear me when I say this,
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  Speaker 3: you are allowed to become even if it course you comfort,
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  Speaker 3: even if it changed your circle, even if it requires distance.
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  Speaker 3: And if nobody told you this, I'm talking to you.
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  Speaker 3: And before we close out tonight, I want to pause
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  Speaker 3: and reflect. What's one small step you can take this
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  Speaker 3: week to honor your growth, even if it's uncomfortable. Come
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  Speaker 3: a step if you're ready to take it with me
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  Speaker 3: and hold each other accountable for it. This is black diamond,
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  Speaker 3: and this has been basic black after dark, where we
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  Speaker 3: just don't talk about it, we feel it. You get
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  Speaker 3: the point, and it's always thank you for keeping it basic. Now,
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  Speaker 3: the friend that I sat down with, she has grown
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  Speaker 3: so much and I am so proud of her for
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  Speaker 3: the growth that she has made. And to tell you
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  Speaker 3: the truth, I didn't see it coming. We talk every
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: once in a while, we conversate about different things that
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  Speaker 3: maybe we're doing, what other people are doing, the things
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  Speaker 3: that's around us, and maybe the news. But when growth happens,
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  Speaker 3: sometimes you may miss it. It's like a bolt of lightning.
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  Speaker 3: Sometimes she has grown in ways that surpassed even the
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  Speaker 3: things that we thought about when we were kids, some
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  Speaker 3: of the things that we dreamt about. She's outgrown a
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  Speaker 3: lot of things, and she's become herself. She's become her own,
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  Speaker 3: she's becoming to the woman that I see that she is.
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  Speaker 3: And I'm hoping that she's listening and watching tonight because
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  Speaker 3: they just wanna let you know that I am so
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  Speaker 3: very proud of you. I know that your family is
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  Speaker 3: proud of you, and you should really be able to
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  Speaker 3: take this vow and be proud of yourself. I know
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  Speaker 3: we had the conversation. You felt as though you didn't
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  Speaker 3: grow that much, but you did. We did all these
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  Speaker 3: points that I spoke with tonight, and you hit each
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  Speaker 3: and every one of them. Don't be embarrassed about it.
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  Speaker 3: Don't feel as though that you can't let go with
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  Speaker 3: some of the things that you accomplish because you feel
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  Speaker 3: as though your accomplishments will mean something different for someone else.
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  Speaker 3: It's going to mean something different because it's your accomplishment.
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  Speaker 3: If there's someone who really wants you to win, then
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  Speaker 3: they're going to accept the growth that you've made. So
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  Speaker 3: I just want to say again, thank you for all listening,
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  Speaker 3: Thank you for keeping it basic, and good night Living.