Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #272 Cubicle Confessions

Transcript

#272 Cubicle Confessions · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Do you know what I wish I had?
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: What's that, Matt?
• 0:02
  Speaker 3: Abs.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Oh, wait, you've got abs. That's me.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Go. I wish I had the confidence that some people
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: have in public bathrooms.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: Go on.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: So here in the studio we have a toilet, a bathroom,
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: if you will, on our floor. There are two cubicles
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: where you can sit down and do a poo.
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: Or scroll, whatever.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Just hang out, have a break from us.
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: And I went in there and there was someone in
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: the cubicle next to me I didn't know what this
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: man looked like. I didn't know who it was. But
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: I still had a level of reservation about I couldn't
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: just freely shit.
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: I've got the answer for this for you. I can
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: solve this. It's called exposure therapy. You just must watch
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: strangers shit from now on. Just stand in there. You
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: don't have to do it. Get used to being around it.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Hang on. I wish I could just, the person next
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: to me was just.
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Honking it?
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: Just. Just didn't care. Whereas I was still like, oh,
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: excuse me.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: You were waiting for the flush to be like.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I didn't want to make any noise. I wish
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: I could just be as carefree as those people who
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: go into a public cubicle, relax their sphincter and just
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: make as much fucking noise as they want.
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: It's worse when like you're working in a space where,
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: say like an office. I used to work in an office, right?
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: And you see the bathroom, you get up to go
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: to the bathroom. You're in there, you know, so everyone
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: knows you've gone to the bathroom. And then if anyone
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: needs to go at the same time, it's like, fuck.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: I need to wait for the flush. That's your first push.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: Your second push, if it's like on board. Yeah. Preach, brother. Preach.
• 1:38
  Speaker 4: There is a formula to doing this.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. So you go flush. Yep. Then you go
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: hand wash first because there's a little window there to
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: get anything from the first toot. And then when that
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: dry comes on. You just grab hold of the seat.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: I was just sitting there with a prolapsed asshole being like, whoo. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: I can't walk the same afterwards.
• 2:07
  Speaker 4: That's why he's got hemorrhoids.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's why he's got hemorrhoids. If there's music in
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: the bathroom, even better. Like when you go to a
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: bathroom and there is music loud, you're like, relief.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Because you're like, yeah, yes. Well, on that note, welcome
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: back to Two Doting Dads. I'm Matty J.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: And I'm Ash.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: And this is a podcast all about parenting. It is
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: the good, it is the bad.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: And the relatable.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: And we would never, ever give advice.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: Well, I just did about the toilet. That's okay, though. Yeah.
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: That's just life advice.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: We just say that. We don't really mean the words
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: we say.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: What?
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: Well, let's be honest.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: I do?
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: Let's be honest.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: I mean everything I say.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but between you and me and Vic, we give
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: a lot of advice.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: We do. We do fuck about a bit as well. Yeah.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: People know it's a joking advice, so use it at
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: your own will. It's a suggestion.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: Should we change the intro to be like, we will
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: give advice, but take it as you will?
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: No, no. We say we don't give advice. We just
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: give suggestions.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: That's my suggestion to you.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: We'll have to run that by the lawyers.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Fuck them.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: They heard that.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: Sorry.
• 3:18
  Speaker 3: We might not give advice, but I reckon we should
• 3:20
  Speaker 3: start giving recommendations because I love a reco.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: What have you got?
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Off the top of your head, yeah. Hey, you can't
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: come in here.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: What have you got?
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: You can't come to a knife fight with nothing.
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: Where do I start?
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: I just realised my shirt wasn't buttoned up. I'm sorry.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: I'm a bloody mess over here. You slut.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: Vic's like, damn it.
• 3:40
  Speaker 3: I can highly, highly, highly recommend a book called The
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: Secret Ingredient.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I wouldn't.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: It's a shit book.
• 3:48
  Speaker 4: The kids loved it. I love the rhyming. It's got
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: lovely pictures.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: I wrote it.
• 3:52
  Speaker 4: It's fun for the whole family. And it's got a
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: great message.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: Is it still for sale?
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: There are a few copies left, I think.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: Online?
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Big W, $ 10. Why not? Oh, Amazon as well.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: Amazon's a good one.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, love that.
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: But yeah, $ 10.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: It is a great book.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: It is a really good book. I have a recommendation.
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: Great.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: Traders. Oh, Traders. Traders, TV show. The Australian one? I
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: keep hearing so much about this. It's the UK version
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: on at the moment.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they came up with it first, right, so they
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: do it the best.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: And there's just.
• 4:21
  Speaker 4: The celebrity one?
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: It's a celebrity one right now.
• 4:24
  Speaker 4: With James Blunt?
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: James Blunt is on it.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, he's great.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: Rob Beckett's on it.
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: He's great too.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: He's a comedian. It's solid.
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: Rob Beckett's fun.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: Solid cast. And my mum, it is just, it's all
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: she thinks about.
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: Did you show her Peep Show?
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Peep Show?
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: I said to you the other day, you should show
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: your mum Peep Show because one of the characters, it's
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: a bit hard to watch to start with because it's
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: from POV. So it's like if you and I were roommates,
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: there's the dialogue, but then the inner dialogue of each character.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: It's a bit confusing to start with, but once you
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: start to watch it.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: Peep Show.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: It's called Peep Show. One of the characters is really uptight,
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: but also really into history.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: Oh my God, is it me?
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Starling Grant. But it's... Fucking so funny.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: Stalingrad.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: Stalingrad, sorry.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Sorry.
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: You're not uptight.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: You just corrected me with Stalin. He's like, say it right.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: How many people died in Stalingrad or whatever?
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: In that particular battle? They had the 6th Army who
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: was from Germany. There's about 600, no.
• 5:23
  Speaker 4: I mean, he's just watched a whole doc on there.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: 600,000, I think, died soldiers.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: This character uses Stalingrad. to try and pick up. Grud. Grud.
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: To try and pick up. It's very funny. With this
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: one woman, yeah, it's very good.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: What kind of world do you live in where history
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: gets you laid?
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: It didn't. Oh. Also, historians are like, no.
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: No.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: So my mum and Laura, it's their time together. I'm
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: kind of on the outer because I can't sit through
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: a full episode because I get distracted.
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: Of Traders.
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I kind of like dip in and out and
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: I don't like to sit on the couch for too long.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: I'm like. You need to be tested.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, totally. And so they watch it together. They love it.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: They love it.
• 6:07
  Speaker 4: I've had good things.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: It's really good. So anyone wants a little show to
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: watch together with your mumsies?
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: Traders.
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: Any records from you?
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: Peep show.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: Peep show?
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Not for kids. Carry on.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: That's all we got.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: Okay, I will see you next time on What Does
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: Dad Recommend?
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: Another recommendation would be this podcast.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, very self-indulgent.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: They're already listening.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: Ash, we've got a message.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: We've got heaps of messages.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: We've got a message that I'm going to read you
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: off the back of. Adota ran the half marathon recently.
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: Oh, congratulations.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: They had the marathon in Melbourne.
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: I told you I've signed up for three marathons and
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: run none of them.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: I thought you were about to say you signed up
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: for another marathon. I was like, fuck it.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: Three.
• 6:45
  Speaker 4: What?
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: I did three and I haven't run any of them.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: Money bags over here?
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: No, no.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: No. Money bags over here?
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: No, no.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: Burning money.
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: I can't commit. I can't commit. I've got that Chinese
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: money now. I've got that Chinese money now.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: I haven't run for about four weeks and I went
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: for a run when it was really hot the other day.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: And it was just awful. It's such a bad.
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: Why would you run when it's so hot?
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: Because I hadn't run, I hadn't done any exercise in
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: four weeks and I was like, oh, I feel so eggy,
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: I need to do something.
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: You need to be tested.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: And I had the kids all day and Laura came
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: home and I said, can I just go for a
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: half an hour run? And she was like, yeah, get
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: out of here. And then like 20 metres down the
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: road I was like, ah, fucking hate my life, this
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: is so shit, hate every second.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: I know, I feel like the run clubs are dying
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: out for sure. They're definitely not. And now they're bird
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: watching clubs. That's what I'm into. When I go for
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: my mentee bee walks, I see a lot of people birdwatching.
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: Don't rat me up.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: Far out. Back to Simone. She says, Simone.
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: Hello, Simone.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to give you guys.
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: Quick question.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: Go on.
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: If she was born a boy, would it be Simon?
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: 100%. Just wanted to give you guys a shout out
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: and say thanks for getting me through my first ever
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: half marathon. Yeah, round of applause.
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: Technically, we ran a marathon too, guys. Yeah.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: There you go. It's not all wasted on you, Ash.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: the route over the weekend i ran the melbourne nike
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: marathon festival not sponsored i'd never even run 21 kilometers
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: before but i've been training towards it and made it
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: to the start line i started my running journey listening
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: to music but somewhere along the way i switched to
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: podcast So I saved up the last few of your
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: potties for the race and you guys kept me company
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: for the two and a half hours I was on
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: the course.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: I was going to say save the last few. I'm like,
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: how long did it take you? Yeah, it does take
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: a while. What? With like an hour long episodes and
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: you said a few.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: But then she clarified two and a half is good.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: That's a good time.
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: Simone, I apologise for the rudeness of Ash so far.
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: I also think it's a brilliant idea, but finish the text.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: So while I was out there questioning my life choices,
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: battling my dodgy knee and wondering why the hell I
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: signed up for this, I had you legends in my ears.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Thanks for the laughs, the distraction and the company. You
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: might not have known it, but you helped me get
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: across that finish line.
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: That's good.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Isn't that beautiful?
• 9:02
  Speaker 4: And the last few eps have been so loose and
• 9:05
  Speaker 4: like rollercoaster. Yeah, rollercoaster.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: That's new.
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: So that would have been funny.
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: Are you pointing a term here?
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: No, I think I've heard it on my phone.
• 9:13
  Speaker 5: Delete it.
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: Get it out. Remove it immediately.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: Well, there you go, Simone. I'm very proud of you.
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: Yes, well done.
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's an achievement, especially as a mum.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, to sign up and actually do it is an achievement.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I couldn't.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: But, yeah, cool. I've got one here for you.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: What have you got?
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: It's in regards to the foreskin washing episode. Imagine running
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: a marathon listening to that.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: Oh, God.
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: So this comes from a dota, a fellow uncircumcised dota
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: by the name of Zach.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: Hi, Zach.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: Hi, Zach. And congratulations on still having your foreskin.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well done.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: Yes, thank you.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: This must be nice.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: He's challenged me to use mint and tea tree body wash.
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: I'm not putting mint or tea anywhere near the end
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: of my cock.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: There's a couple of, and this is not... an attack
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: on the gays because we all know they are the
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: backbone of this podcast.
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: We are allies.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: And we are allies. But there's a couple of messages
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: who are like, Their foreskin.
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they said they'd clean your foreskin.
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: I got a message. Don't you worry. I get a
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: message every week. Wait, wait, wait.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: What did they say?
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: They were like, I'll clean your foreskin, Ash. Or like
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: I'll get a DM that says I'd love to clean
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: her foreskin.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: That's lovely.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Honestly, compliment. Yeah.
• 10:25
  Speaker 4: But I will say I've used that mint and tea
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: tree body wash.
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: Whoa.
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: On your foreskin.
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: No. It's a really nice body wash, but it does
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: leave your skin feeling tingly.
• 10:34
  Speaker 4: So the fact that he suggested it.
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: I feel like it maybe will verge on the side
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: of that guy who put like those popping candy.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: He put some deep heat in there too while you
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: were at it.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: I know. That's pretty extreme.
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Mint. Yeah.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: Don't do it, Ash. I won't allow you.
• 10:49
  Speaker 4: Do it as an experiment.
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: Get Dan to do it.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: Is it actually?
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, okay.
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: You have to remember if it was.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: I don't want to ask if it is or it isn't.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: I don't want to ask.
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: He sides with Ash.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: I knew it.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: You wish you could have yours back.
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: Get it out.
• 11:07
  Speaker 5: Come on.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: Today.
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: No, I don't want to disappoint everyone. Look, I'm not
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: going to try it.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: Look for anyone who may be new here.
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: Sorry?
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: Oh, I just said missing out. You're going to miss out.
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: Okay, thanks, Vick. Vick's like, send me a video of it.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: No, it's really nice.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: What do I do?
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: What do you do?
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: Do you dip it in?
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: No, no, you put it on a loofah and you're
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: just putting it over your whole body.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: A loofah? Wow.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: A loofah bread.
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: How do you wash your body?
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: With my hands.
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: With my hands. No loofahs.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: Dan always buys a new loofah. What's a loofah? It's
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: like a.
• 11:41
  Speaker 4: Like that fluffy thing that you put your soap in.
• 11:43
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: Scrubber.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: You have a scrubber?
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: That's there, but I don't know if it's April's or mine.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: No one uses it. We don't know whose it is.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: Sometimes if there was a loofah there, I'd use it
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: on the butt crack and I'd be like, oh.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: That's nice. There's one hanging off one of the hot
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: or cold faucets. But I don't know if it's mine
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: or April's. No one's afraid. I don't know.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: What do you mean?
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: She's sitting there. I think it must be April's. It's
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: not mine.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: Get a new one. It's not yours. It's April's. How
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: many people in your shower?
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I'm going to ask April when I
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: get home whose is it because I've never seen her
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: use it.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Someone's broken in planting a loofah.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: We're a non-loofah household.
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: April's trying to suggest to you.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: I'm fucking dead.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: Then she gets the mint and the tea fucking soaked out.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: She's like, Victoria, you just dip your.
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: Dick in it.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: She's like, bring those gays over and clean up horses.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: Here's a tub of mint and dip your dick in it.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: Things are a fucking mess.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It's like, I'll walk out of there and my
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: fucking dick's on fire.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: Thanks. For anyone who is new here, we have had
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: a few listeners join us. This is an episode where
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: we attack the dilemmas from the doters.
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's about you guys. So we appreciate you sending
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: them in.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: And every now and then we'll cross over to Ash's foreskin.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: And come back.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: And come back to the dilemmas.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: It's a hell of a journey.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: And actually, I've missed out on the last few housekeeping
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: apps because I'm absent.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: Too many holidays. I know. She's a jet setter. That's
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: for sure.
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: Speaking of jet setting, Adota did ask for some tips
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: on Vietnam.
• 13:06
  Speaker 5: Oh, yeah, okay.
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: So if you head to my Instagram, Vic.TV, there are
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: many posts on my Vietnam trip and where I went
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: and what to do.
• 13:13
  Speaker 4: There is so many things to do in Vietnam. I
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: can highly, highly, highly recommend it.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: Hanoi?
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: Hoi An?
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: That's close.
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: There's a lot. It's quite a big country. People forget.
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: And foo cock is they say it's the.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: Foos cock?
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: Oh, God, here we go.
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: Does he use tea and lemon on his cock?
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: I don't know if I'm pronouncing that terribly because it's
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: the same as like fur.
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: It's like P-H-O, you know.
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: Fat cock.
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: Fur cock.
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: But it's in the Gulf of Thailand so it's beautiful
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: white sand and tropical waters.
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: And they say it's like the Maldives of Asia.
• 13:43
  Speaker 5: But, yeah.
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: Can highly, highly recommend to go. There's so much to
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: do with kids. A million theme parks, water parks.
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: The good thing is you can start at Ho Chi Minh,
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: which is a main city. You can travel all the
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: way up the coast to Hoi An and then fly
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: home from there. So you can do it. It's honestly
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: so much bigger than people give it credit for. It's
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: really thin, long and skinny.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: I have to ask because you stayed at a hotel
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: and you stayed at an Airbnb, which is better with kids? Resort.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: All the way.
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: Agreed.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: And we're going to do Bali next year and we're
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: going to just book a resort, not an Airbnb.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: Have you signed off on that trip? Yeah.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: It's a long way away. What dates are you thinking?
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: The last three we didn't even know were coming up.
• 14:22
  Speaker 4: I gave you so many notices.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: And then you went to Ulladulla for that one day.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: For the record, what dates is it?
• 14:28
  Speaker 4: It's the June, July holidays. The winter holidays.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: Not for me. We are recording. We're recording those.
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: We record every day.
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: Feels like it's Sunday.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: Oh, my gosh.
• 14:38
  Speaker 5: I'm joking.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: Speaking of Bali, Ash right now will be in Bali.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: Will I?
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: Also a great family destination.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: No, I would have got back yesterday.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: Well, this is awkward.
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, I still love it. How was it? How
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: was it?
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Where were you going in Bali?
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: We were just going to do some bonging.
• 14:54
  Speaker 4: Oh, the best place in all of Bali.
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we don't do mainland anymore.
• 14:57
  Speaker 5: It's disgusting.
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: We don't do the mainland.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: Look, we can straight off that mainland because it's full
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: of fucking bogans. You get on the bogan bus and
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: then you get off at another suburb of Sydney.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: It's terrible.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: Why didn't you go on school holidays?
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: I was in China and Singapore. We didn't go. This
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: was a Jetstar job that I did.
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: It must be nice to have that kind of a lifestyle.
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: You can talk. I mean, where's next? You can't talk.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: It is time for this now. Now you need us
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: more than ever.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: Know that we still have each other. You can send
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: us your doting dilemma. You can send us.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: Your doting dilemma. Ella, Ella, Ella, Ella.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: Doting dilemma. Doting dilemma is a great song. It's better
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: than the original. Do you want me to start? I'll start.
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Please.
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: I've got Deb here because it's a short one. I
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: don't want to read too much. Deb, Deborah, some would say.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: One of our boomer doters. We do love the boomers.
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: Don't pull that face.
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: What?
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: We do. We love all doters, regardless.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: Of age and generation. What do you do when a
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: two-year-old arches their back? Sorry, that doesn't make sense. What
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: to do with the two-year-old's arched back throwback? Throwback.
• 16:21
  Speaker 4: Poor Tima, me, has no idea except old school methods, lol.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: Okay, can we reword that? Okay, I think Deborah is
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: trying to say, shush, you shut up over there. This
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: is not very nice. Someone's fucked the sentence up and
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: I get the blame for not being able to read.
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: No, that's how she wrote it verbatim.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: That's an attack, Debra.
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: Fucking Deb. We love you, Deb, but get your sentences
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: right because I'm like Ron Burgundy. I'll read it off there.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: I'll read it just off the thing. It's social media.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: It's slang.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she's like abbreviating.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: She doesn't know how to abbreviate. She does.
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: She wrote lol.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: She probably thinks it means lots of love.
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: Maybe actually.
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: Also, Deb is a regular commenter in the Facebook group.
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: So shout out to Deb.
• 17:05
  Speaker 4: She's amazing.
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: So any attacks on Deb, I cannot sit here in silence.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: Fair. Sorry, Deb.
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: Sorry.
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: So what would you do if the toddler arches their back?
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: So we're talking about what do you do if a
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: two-year-old or toddler throws their back, throws and arches their
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: back like they're obviously having a meltdown sort of thing.
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: And she said.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: Smack him.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: Well said. Joking, joking, joking, joking. That's what she might
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: be doing because she says she's a grandma and has
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: no idea except old school methods. So, hey, she's come
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: to us for advice. Matt just gave it.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: I feel like back in the day it would have
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: been such common practice just to give the kid a
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: big old wallop.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because they do go like real stiff, especially if
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: you're getting into a car seat.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: And you're like that is.
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: And as a grandma you wouldn't have as much strength
• 17:48
  Speaker 4: as if you were like a younger person.
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: That's a blatant.
• 17:51
  Speaker 4: Some grandmas might not.
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: Deb is very fit.
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: She could be like a muscle debt. She could be
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: like able to hit the gym six days a week.
• 17:59
  Speaker 3: I'm just thinking of myself in like 20, 30 years' time,
• 18:01
  Speaker 3: how I would go and probably not very well.
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: There's not a whole lot I could really suggest other
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: than like what do you do? Try and bring them down.
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: Can I suggest?
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: Actually, I've got one.
• 18:10
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: If I was Jen, the Oracle, what would I do?
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: Oh, damn it.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: That's what I was doing. I would get down to
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: their level and say, get in the fucking car.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: No, get down and go. I wonder what it would
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: be like if you got in the car. And we
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: got to drive where we were going.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: Palms open and say, I can see that you're really frustrated.
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: I would also suggest prepping the kid beforehand so that
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: they know what's happening because kids start to fight back
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: and do those sort of things when they're caught unaware.
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: Whereas if they know that it's coming, it can kind
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: of help ease them or ease the anxiety about what's
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: about to happen.
• 18:44
  Speaker 4: Or if all else fails, bribe.
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: This is what I would do. Please.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: Please.
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: If I was putting that child into a car to
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: go to somewhere for that child, i.e. park, kids party, whatever,
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: something to entertain them and they did that, I would
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: just go, look, I don't want to go. I'm going
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: for you. But if you don't want to go, then
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: why would we go?
• 19:03
  Speaker 4: I actually think I used that exact psychology on Louis
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: this morning.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't do any of this shit for me.
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: I'm doing it for you.
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: About wiping his bum.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like my kids are like, I'm trying to get
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: them ready to go out the door. And I'm like,
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: and they're just fucking around. I'm like, it's simple. I
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: don't want to go. Me and your mom want to
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: stay here. This is fun for us, but you guys
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: are bored. So we're doing this for you.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: How do they respond?
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: Shut up, Dad. Yeah, okay. Nah, it's usually met with, oh, shit, okay, yeah.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, I like that.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, give it a go.
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: I haven't tried that.
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: It's a suggestion, not advice.
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: Give it a go.
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: Because if you're right, you're not going to the park
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: for you.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: Actually, just quickly, I got asked this morning, I was
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: getting my coffee and there's a family next to me
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: with a newborn child. Child was very happy, smiling, looked
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: at me and I was like, what a gorgeous boy
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: you have there. And they were like, thank you.
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: Creep.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: And they said, I do feel creep whenever I'm like,
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: it's a beautiful baby.
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: What a delicious child.
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: No, they said, oh, do you have kids? And I said, yeah,
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: I've got three.
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: Father of the year. Yeah. You definitely went, well, funny
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: you asked that because I'm actually father of the year.
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: He carries it around.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: And they didn't even give out trophies. He just made
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: one himself like that one up there.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: No, and they said, you know, it is the age
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: old hierarchy. Who's got older kids slash more kids. And
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: they were like, what's it like with three? And I
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: was like, well, let me explain to you. And I
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: reckon time goes so much quicker with three.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: It goes, it goes fast with two.
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I find life's going so fast.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Don't even worry about it.
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: Lenny's almost turning four. I just can't believe that.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: I know. Macy goes to school next year. Little Macy.
• 20:39
  Speaker 4: I know.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: She's not ready.
• 20:41
  Speaker 4: She's going to look so cute in her uniform.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she was walking around in an Oscars uniform the
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: other day.
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you should have done this.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: You told us twice. I'll tell you one more fucking time.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I would say, sorry, Deb, to round that off.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: I think we're done with Deb.
• 20:55
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: I think you did enough damage on that one.
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: Good. Let's damage the next one. I don't know how
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: to damage your story.
• 21:04
  Speaker 4: Speaking of damage, toilet damage.
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: Speaking of damage, let's damage someone else's.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: Okay. This one was shared on the Facebook group, Ash,
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: and I'll keep it anonymous.
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: People can just go and look for it.
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: They can if they want to. Oh, join the Facebook group.
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: It's thriving.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: Very good.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: It's thriving.
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: First time toilet training and I'm in need of some advice.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: Come to the right place. suggestions. My daughter is two
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: and a half, has absolutely nailed doing wheeze in the toilet,
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: but pooing is a completely different story. When she was
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: wearing nappies, she would usually do one to two poos
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: a day. Now we're finding that she's holding on for
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: a couple of days and then hiding somewhere to do
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: a poo in her undies. We'll often catch her squatting
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: somewhere in the house and take her to the toilet.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: She'll then sit there and try, but she says she
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: can't go. Then literally two minutes later, she'll do a
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: poo in her undies. We use the reward system.
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: We used a reward system. We tried prizes.
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to read it, Vic.
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: I was just trying to help you.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: How does that feel? How does that feel there, big guy?
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to read the question. Oh, get on with
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: it then.
• 22:07
  Speaker 4: I've got to go soon.
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's all about you. Oh, wow. This is meant
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: to be about the Doders. This isn't about Vic.
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: Okay. So use a reward system? I know.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: Get on with it.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: I use a reward system and she usually responds to that.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: We've tried the same approach with poos, even offering an
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: instant prize for a very first poo in the toilet,
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: but she just won't do it. We're now nearly two
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: weeks and starting to feel a bit stuck. I think
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: she's lacking confidence when it comes to pooing in the toilet.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: Has anyone been through something similar and what has helped?
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: Well, you were just talking about the public toilet thing.
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: It's probably maybe similar. Maybe it's stage fright. Maybe it's like,
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: feels like taboo.
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: How are your kids in their shits?
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: Macy can shit their ass down fucking about as thick
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: as this microphone.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: Oh, my days.
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: I feel sorry for her asshole, really.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: Always been the case. Always.
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: Remember that big fucking football she pooped out into her
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: nappy that time?
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah. What are you feeding her?
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: She doesn't eat that much.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: Where's it come from?
• 23:03
  Speaker 4: I'm always surprised at how much comes out of them.
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: Don't you think?
• 23:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: I'm always surprised at how much comes out of them.
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: Poor Lily, she actually had the reverse problem and she
• 23:16
  Speaker 3: got into hospital recently because she had so much poo
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: in her body.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: Actually? She was majority poo.
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: Here we go. How did you know that there was
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: a problem? Did you know that her poo, were you like,
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: hang on a second?
• 23:28
  Speaker 3: I had no idea there was a problem because she
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: was still pooing every day. She had a poo the
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: day before and the day of, which was what confused
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: the doctors, but she had so.
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: Much poo backed up all in her intestine? No, in
• 23:38
  Speaker 4: her colon. In her body.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: Intestines, I don't have intestines. Yeah, it was awful.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: She was like 30% poo.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: Did she smell?
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Was it seeping out of her paws?
• 23:46
  Speaker 5: No, guys.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: That's a serious question.
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: I have heard with poos because there is a drop
• 23:54
  Speaker 3: from the buttock to the toilet. Scared.
• 23:57
  Speaker 4: They are scared of the drop.
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: So I suggested try having her do one on a potty,
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: smaller drop. There's no splash or anything like that. Or
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: there is a video that I showed Louie and Lily
• 24:09
  Speaker 3: when they were potty training called Poo Land, which I
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: will play for you right now.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: Please, take it away. Can't wait to hear what Poo
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: Land is.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: I hope it's a song.
• 24:20
  Speaker 5: Poo is very shy with people. Poo just wants to
• 24:23
  Speaker 5: go home. Poo wants to go home to Poo Land.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: This is like hypnotic.
• 24:29
  Speaker 5: In Poo Land, Poo can tell Poo to leave.
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: It's so trippy.
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: What is that?
• 24:41
  Speaker 4: It's the poo laughing.
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: That's terrifying.
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: Poo just wants to tell his mummy and daddy when
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: he feels.
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: Sad or grumpy.
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: I think she's lost the plot.
• 24:55
  Speaker 5: The only way for poo to get into poo land.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: Is down the loo.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: No wonder Lily was all backed up. This will help you.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: Watch this.
• 25:06
  Speaker 5: Much too small for people, even little ones like you.
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: This is Ollie.
• 25:11
  Speaker 5: Ollie likes football and reading books. Pooh is very, very shy.
• 25:16
  Speaker 5: Pooh tries to stay hidden in Ollie's bottom. Pooh needs
• 25:20
  Speaker 5: Ollie's help to send Pooh home.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: I think I've heard enough.
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: That is weird.
• 25:27
  Speaker 4: It is weird.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: Vic, you started off with some really good advice.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like that's like the salad fingers. Yes.
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: It's like a rusty spoon.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: Is that salad fingers?
• 25:38
  Speaker 4: What's salad fingers?
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Touch the poo if you want to touch the poo.
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: I like it when the rusty spoon.
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: But essentially if you get to the end of the video.
• 25:46
  Speaker 3: It's all about sending poo back to poo land to
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: be with his parents.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: No, I get the message. The delivery was just a- Oh,
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: the laugh is a bit scary.
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: It's just a bit. I'm scared. I don't want to
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: poo anymore.
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: It'll send the poo right back up.
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: Let's go back to the splash because I would agree, okay,
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: sometimes when the splash hits your butthole- It's a lot.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: It can be a bit jumpy. It can be a bit, oh!
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we had the little sit-down potty next to the toilet-
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: And that was great. We had no issues at all
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: with that.
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: Here's a thought. Why don't we do this? Why don't
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: we lay the poo a little bed of toilet paper
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: first and you can poop onto the toilet paper, no
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: splash back, and then it goes straight down.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Toilet paper's not cheap.
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: One or two squares.
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: That was also my advice for Matt if he's worried
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: about the sounds in the toilet as well.
• 26:37
  Speaker 4: You put toilet paper down.
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: No, it's more so my arse. Oh, okay. The sound
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: not so much.
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: Muffled.
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: No, I'm a bit gassy sometimes.
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: Is it like when they get those trumpets and it's like... Yeah.
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Congratulations.
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: You've got good sound. You've got good pitch. You should
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: use it. Bathroom acoustics are amazing.
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: What are you talking about?
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: I'm just trying to hurry this along, really.
• 27:01
  Speaker 3: The other thing I've heard is if you give your
• 27:03
  Speaker 3: kids like some sort of child safe laxative, like a
• 27:06
  Speaker 3: little bit, it helps loosen it up.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: You want to drug your children?
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: Like a Winnie Redd and a coffee. Yeah, Timmy, have.
• 27:16
  Speaker 4: This.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: I'll tell you right now, if you gave your child
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: a Winnie Redd and a coffee, it would poop everything
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: it had out of it. Just saying.
• 27:24
  Speaker 4: Well, because a kid, if you're pooping and it slides out,
• 27:27
  Speaker 4: it's much more.
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: Feels better.
• 27:29
  Speaker 3: It's less anxiety-inducing than if you have to push it out.
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It does feel good when it does slide out
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: on its own sometimes.
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: But, yeah, Dan, I hope that helps.
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: You've got to reward her. If she's, like, trying, you know,
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: and it doesn't happen, I think still give her, like,
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: a bit of a, bit of praise for attempting to
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: sit in the toilet to do a poo. Because two
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: and a half, that's young, dude.
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it is young.
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: Why don't you do this?
• 27:52
  Speaker 3: A lot of girls do do it at two and
• 27:54
  Speaker 3: a half. Boys are a bit later. Two and a
• 27:56
  Speaker 3: half is young.
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: Why don't you? Here we go. What have you got?
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: What have you got, big guy?
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: If she keeps pooping in her undies, just get her
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: to sit in her undies and see what happens. And
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: then you can go, okay, well, I know where the
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: problem is here. Okay. Well, I don't know where the
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: problem is, but she was still pooping in her undies
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: sitting over it. So maybe it's something in the toilet,
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: like the warring can. Find out what the problem is.
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: You might have to lose a pair of undies at
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: the time, but she's already pooping in them anyway. Just go, hey,
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: why don't you try this? Sit on the toilet with
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: your undies on. Stay there. Don't move. Here's a book.
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: Feel comfortable. I'll come back.
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: She's two and a half, bro.
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: No. Here's a nudie mag.
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: But you know what I mean.
• 28:27
  Speaker 3: We give a book to Lily because Lily has to
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: sit on the toilet now for five minutes every day.
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: She's reading Shakespeare.
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: And so we give her a book so she can
• 28:32
  Speaker 4: just like look at the pictures.
• 28:33
  Speaker 5: Lovely.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: Shakespeare. I, thy, sit on thy throne.
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: I heard you the first time.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: This is the sort of stuff they don't tell you
• 28:39
  Speaker 3: when you want to become a parent.
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: That's why you come to us.
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: I tell everyone this. Yeah.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: Well, we're on Dan's life. Thanks.
• 28:47
  Speaker 4: Oh, no, anonymous.
• 28:48
  Speaker 5: Oops.
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, anonymous. Sorry, Dan.
• 28:50
  Speaker 3: I mean, oops.
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: This is a DM, Matt. Came through our Instagram, 220dazzle
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok. Hey, fellas, I'm a mum of two,
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: a two-year-old and six months. Congratulations. It's fresh. When my
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: partner and I had the two-year-old, she was mixed fed.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: breast and formula, which was a great way for my
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: partner and her to bond as he could help with
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: the feeds. Whereas with my six-month-old, he's exclusively breastfed and
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: can't stand my partner. Even with expressed milk, he rarely
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: takes a bottle from him and always prefers me to
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: hold him, which is expected, to be honest. I know
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: this makes my partner feel pretty useless. Is there anything
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: I can tell him that may make him feel better? P.S.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: Love the potty. so just to clarify oh wait hang
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: on i might have read that wrong There's a good chance.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: I have no doubt you did.
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: And can't stand my partner. Yeah, I thought it was like, yeah, sorry. Sorry,
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: I shouldn't have attacked you. I've ignored it because it
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: was silly.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: I apologize. You read that very well.
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: You did actually.
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: You really did a really good job.
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: Shut the fuck up.
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: You did really good.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: You're patronizing me.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: I don't like it.
• 29:56
  Speaker 4: That was a good read.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: That was mean for me and I apologize.
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: I didn't even hear it. Good, because I don't respect you.
• 30:01
  Speaker 4: You recover from it.
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: Vic, how many fucking noises do you have to make
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: in the recording?
• 30:10
  Speaker 4: I turned it off to play the Poo Land video.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: Well, you did it clearly.
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: I had to turn the sound back on for the
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: Poo Land video.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: That's your last warning.
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: That traumatising video, I'm never going to get my fucking.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: Watch this, kids.
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: I'm never going to be able to poo again. Go
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: and poo, I dare you. What's going to happen if
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: I do? You'll find out.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: Who put you on to that video?
• 30:34
  Speaker 4: Our friends.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: Defriend them.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: You should murder them.
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: The mother's groups.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: So she's got a six-month-old.
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: Yep.
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: And the child who's six months wants nothing to do
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: with the dad.
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: Which is fairly common.
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: There's also a two-year-old.
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: Who's the two-year-old?
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the two-year-old was mixed-fed.
• 30:49
  Speaker 4: A mum of two.
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: And that's why, that's what she said. So she's had
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: the good life.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: Had the good life.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: She's had the good life of both, which I think,
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: you know, it's great that that can happen. But then
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: they've tried to have the good life again with the
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: second one but only wants boob from the boob, not
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: the bottle.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: But I think that first time that was... That you're lucky. Yeah,
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: you're lucky. I think the norm is why the fuck
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: would a baby want anyone else when it comes to feeding...
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: It wouldn't want anyone else other than mum with the boobies.
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: At that age, yeah.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like fuck that.
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: I suppose I remember Oscar would take a bottle here
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: and there to give April some reprieve. So like it's
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: great to give mum a rest, but like every night, no,
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: no way, no chance.
• 31:29
  Speaker 3: No.
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: But with this one, she's obviously saying they're stuck in
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: this situation, fine, but she wants to know what it
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: is that she can do to help make him not,
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: because he obviously wanted to do it too, because there's
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: a chance to bond. Which is great, but he now
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: doesn't have that.
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I think feeding, kick back to the curb.
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: That's not your jam, dude. Not in this instance. And
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: it's not in this age.
• 31:49
  Speaker 4: Not with second child.
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: But I think when it comes to like changing nappies, boom,
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: that is you. You step up to the plate.
• 31:55
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: Spottling. That's what it is. I think like maybe he really,
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: because we're just assuming here. What I'm saying is. Those
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: times where he was feeding, maybe he really relished it
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: because he got to bond.
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: It's nice. It is lovely. He's a nice.
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: Where he's feeling useless because he doesn't have that time
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: to bond.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I'm saying. I'm saying. Shift your focus. Yeah,
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: and that will come later. Lifetime. You've got plenty of
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: fucking time to feed, dude. Don't you worry.
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: Can I ask, did Macy do the same?
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: Macy was, she was boob. She would take bottled milk
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: from me sometimes.
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 32:30
  Speaker 3: Because I would say predominantly second child is more clingy
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: to mum because they can see that they need to
• 32:37
  Speaker 3: get your attention because there's this other little person trying
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: to get your attention. So for me, Lily did not
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: want a bottle at all and she was exclusively breastfed
• 32:46
  Speaker 3: and so that meant that Dan had to take charge
• 32:48
  Speaker 3: of Louie. And then that meant they had all sorts
• 32:50
  Speaker 3: of extra adventures, which I also missed out on. So
• 32:53
  Speaker 3: it's just a reframe that you might not have these
• 32:56
  Speaker 3: experiences with this child, but you can have totally new
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: experiences with your toddler.
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I agree. And you'll get a chance to feed.
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: Like when it comes to solids and stuff.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: I hate that. Yeah, really?
• 33:06
  Speaker 4: I hate solids.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: I thought it was so fun.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure if your kids eat, so Poppy's probably
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: my best eater.
• 33:14
  Speaker 4: Yeah, when they eat, it's great.
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God.
• 33:17
  Speaker 4: When they don't eat, it's fucking hell.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: I was feeding Poppy yesterday and I was like, this
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: is the best feeling in the world where she had
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: like a little frozen thing of like fruit and porridge
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: oats thing. She ate the whole thing, like every mouthful,
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: just like boom. And I was like this is the
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: happiest I've ever been in my whole life.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: I don't know what it is about kids and eating.
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: Lily had three bowls of pasta last night and I'm
• 33:42
  Speaker 3: just like.
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: I'm on top of the world.
• 33:44
  Speaker 4: It makes me feel so happy. Louis had half a bowl.
• 33:47
  Speaker 4: He's my bad.
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: And you're like you disappoint me.
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: Oscar started.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: Joking.
• 33:51
  Speaker 4: I had to like feed him like a baby.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: Oscar started to actually eat but Macy's still a battle.
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah. But, yeah, bath times, dude. Poppy, bath time for me,
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: that was like it's such a nice bonding time and
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: I love it as well because I'm obsessed with my phone.
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: I have to just constantly distract myself and in the bath,
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: no temptation to have fun. It's just you, baby, locked in.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: It's quality time.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: So what we're saying is shift your perspective onto another
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: activity that you can bond with that child but then
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: with the two-year-old. Don't forget about them.
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't forget.
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: Don't forget about that.
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: This is your time to shine with the two-year-olds.
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because same as with Oscar, when April with Macy,
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: Oscar was my remit.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 34:33
  Speaker 2: So we would do everything together because, yeah. So there
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: you go.
• 34:36
  Speaker 3: I miss out on a lot of zoo visits because
• 34:38
  Speaker 3: we're zoo friends because Dan would always take him to
• 34:41
  Speaker 3: the zoo. That's how we came up with our two-hour zoo.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: He's a great dad.
• 34:45
  Speaker 2: He is. He's a great dad.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: I'm a great dad.
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: Well, I hope we answered your question.
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: Vic, it is currently 3.17, by the way.
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: Yep.
• 34:51
  Speaker 4: I'll just have to leave.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: Must be nice.
• 34:54
  Speaker 4: Because I really want to go to swimming lessons.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: I'm being a fuckwit. I know.
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: Whose swimming lessons are they?
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: Louie's.
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: So you don't even have to get in.
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: He's moved up a swimming class.
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: Sounds like a holiday to me.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: Another one.
• 35:09
  Speaker 4: Getting Louie into swimmers is not a holiday.
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: Trust me.
• 35:13
  Speaker 4: I'm also going to show up without any snacks.
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: Take him to Red Bull.
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: We've got a biscuit box. Yeah, make some biscuits.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: As a music bar. Oh, yeah, true. Okay.
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: But you're not allowed any of them.
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: Let's keep moving.
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: Okay, this one is for Megan. For or from?
• 35:32
  Speaker 5: From.
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: I apologise.
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: You're doing really good, bud.
• 35:34
  Speaker 4: But the advice is for her.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: There's no advice here, Vic. It's just suggestions. You're doing
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: really well.
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: Thank you. Vic, any thoughts? Excellent. Stop.
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: Great start.
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Thank you, everyone. You're all also really, both of you
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: have been fantastic. Don't wrap me up.
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: Get on with it.
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: Megan, my partner, who's a tradie in brackets, went for
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: a job interview and when the interviewer mentioned, in brackets,
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: lots of overtime, my partner responded saying he's unable to
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: do overtime as he has to pick up the kids
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: at 3.30. The interviewer seemed baffled and responded with, well,
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: what does your missus not have a car or something?
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: Ooh.
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: To which my partner responded that I work in the
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: city and I don't get home till 6.30. I feel
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: like there needs to be more discussion of flexibility and
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: understanding for dads in trades because until these male-dominated industries
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: start to shake up the old school views, it doesn't
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: enable dads to step up to the plate in equal parenting.
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: That is such a shit question to ask someone. Just
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: straight up. Let me say this. If you're interviewing someone
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: for a potential job at your company and you throw
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: that question, you shouldn't be at that company. That's a
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: fucking shit question. And then also this generalization of the, oh,
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: that's mum's job. Like shut the fuck up, dude. Like
• 36:53
  Speaker 2: I would have jumped the desk. I would have fucking
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: jumped the dance.
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: No, you wouldn't have.
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: I would have helped here.
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: I love how Ash is like, in the podcast studio,
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: he's like, I would have taken my shirt off and
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: I would have put them in a headlock and took
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: them to the ground.
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but this is all in the shower later when
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: I'm thinking about what I would have done if I
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: had the.
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: Balls to do it.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: You big softy.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: You ain't hurting anyone.
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: I definitely would have been like, First of all, if
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: you're going to ask me questions like that, that's not
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: the right job for you.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: Question. You've done a few trades. You're a painter. When
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: you were painting, did you have kids? No. No.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: I was 17. I don't think I had kids.
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: Actually, okay.
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: Will.
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: Will.
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: Will. Well.
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: Well. Well. Well said. Dan.
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: Dan is a tradie.
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: Dan is a tradie.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: But he's his own boss, I guess.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's different. Look, Mike. Let's use Mike.
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: Mike.
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: Mike is not his own boss. He works for a
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: guy that has kids himself. And Mike always talks about
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: that it all comes out in the wash for him.
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: So for him, he's like he might start late because
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: he's doing drop-off, but he always works a few hours
• 37:57
  Speaker 2: later anyway because he feels like if they're willing to
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: give that flexibility to me, I'm willing to give the
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: flexibility to them, which it's a two-way street. Totally. And
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: I've worked enough in HR to know that if you're
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: flexible with an employee, they'll be flexible with you and
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: you'll get the best out of them.
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: Also, Vic, totally fine for you to go to swimming
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: classes this afternoon.
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: Thank you. But can't you fucking missus do that?
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: I was actually going to use this as an example
• 38:25
  Speaker 3: because I don't work traditional like nine to five hours
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: on this job because of the kids and I have
• 38:31
  Speaker 3: to do school pick-ups sometimes and obviously swimming lessons.
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: It's becoming a bit much.
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: But I do always make up the hours later and
• 38:38
  Speaker 3: a good worker will always like get the work done
• 38:41
  Speaker 3: and so it shouldn't really matter what time they work.
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: I know on building sites, especially big ones, they can
• 38:46
  Speaker 3: have a lot of restrictions on like timings and even Dan,
• 38:49
  Speaker 3: to be honest, he's sometimes like I can't stop until
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: 3.30 and then I've got to pack up.
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: That takes half an hour. So like he's always going
• 38:55
  Speaker 4: to be home late as well.
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: It can be a little bit trickier for those people
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: in trades to just like, pack up their stuff and
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: leave versus those who write emails for a living.
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: Hi.
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: It's not like you're just going to go close the laptop.
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's literally a 30 to 45-minute pack up each day.
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, same with Mike, right? And that's the thing. If
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: you're in an interview and that question comes out, immediately
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: you know that's not the right place to work.
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, 100%.
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: I know it's hard as well because there's not a
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: million jobs out there and sometimes you need to just
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: get food on the table. But i if if you're
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: in desperate need of that position itself and that's the
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: sort of question you get you just lie to that
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: guy and then and then when it comes down to
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: it and you need to leave early or not do
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: the overtime have a conversation again and then find the
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: right company.
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: To work for but but i almost think like We
• 39:44
  Speaker 3: need to start changing the conversation and instead of lying
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: to him, I think you kind of need to call
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: him out and say this isn't really a fair response.
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: Their version of like dynamics of both parents when they're boomers, like,
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: Back then a house was like 50 bucks.
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: I know. And they had the luxury of only ever
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: having one person working. Like that world is absolutely fucking gone.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and you're right. It's kind of like it's not
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: appropriate to be asking those sort of questions and it
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: does absolutely need to change. But at the moment we're
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: sort of teetering in this area where the generation that
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: that was the case is still in hiring positions. And
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: you can't teach an old dog new tricks. I've worked
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: with enough tradies to know for a fact that they're
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: just so fucking stubborn, these fucking tradies, that they will
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: not budge on things like that when it's actually, if
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: me as an employee turned around and said, hey, I've
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: got to dart off early, my kid's sick at school,
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: and they were like, well, mate, straight away I'd be like,
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: fuck you. Because at the end of the day, more
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: importantly is my family, not you. Totally. Totally.
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: But I would argue that it's not a tradie issue.
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: It's an Australian cultural issue because what Georgie Dent from
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: The Parenthood has said is that the way that parenting
• 41:04
  Speaker 3: is structured and the work week is structured is is
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: based on what we had in the 90s and the
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: 80s where there was always one parent at home and
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: that's why the working week doesn't match up to the
• 41:13
  Speaker 3: school week and that's why we're left with so many hours.
• 41:15
  Speaker 3: And so this poor guy who's trying to like support
• 41:18
  Speaker 3: his family and also support his wife is getting stuck
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: in this like no-man's zone.
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and like they would get the best out of
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: that employee if they were to come to the future.
• 41:30
  Speaker 4: Totally.
• 41:31
  Speaker 3: But I think the conversation just needs to start changing
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: so that men.
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: of every generation know.
• 41:37
  Speaker 3: That what used to be the norm can't really.
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: Be the norm anymore. It's about reshaping the version of
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: fatherhood that we inherited instead of just passing on the
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: same version down to the next generation.
• 41:49
  Speaker 3: Totally.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: And we saw how, we're seeing how the previous generation
• 41:53
  Speaker 2: parented and that now we're all like, we don't want
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: to be like that.
• 41:57
  Speaker 4: Because it was wrong. Well, you guys are perfect examples
• 42:00
  Speaker 4: of that.
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: Like I said, we are teetering on the edge of
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: those people being in hiring positions still. And there's going
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: to be a day when it's going to be you
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: and I sort of generation hiring where it's like your
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: family does come first because if you put my family
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: first as an employer, I'm more likely to put you
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: in a better position when you need me.
• 42:19
  Speaker 4: Beautiful.
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: I'd hire you.
• 42:20
  Speaker 2: Thank you. I'm unhorrible.
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: Hey, before we go, I do want to remind the
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: good doters, the great doters, that you can at any
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: point submit your dilemma, a question that you would like
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: our input in. It's not advice. It's suggestions from myself, Ash, Vic.
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: We are here at your service. So send them in
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: either via our DMs or an email at hello at twodatingdads.com.
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: And if you've enjoyed this episode, please leave a review, subscribe,
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: send it to your friends. Okay. Send it to a
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: shit boss. Spotify, YouTube, Apple Podcasts.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: This one's not on YouTube.
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but the other ones are. The other ones are.
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: Good recovery. And don't forget, you can also sign a
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: really important petition. It's been run by the Parenthood. It's
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: about advocating for dads to be more hands-on, more involved
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: as parents and the ability to take more time off
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: for paid parental leave.
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: Yes, for newborns so they can bond and help out
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: around the house way more.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: Love it. All right.
• 43:17
  Speaker 2: See you next time.
• 43:18
  Speaker 3: Bye. Bye. Bye.
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community.
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadigal land.