Latest / WOC and Allies: Business and Career Realtalk with Elaine Lou Cartas / 33. 5 Reflections from My Retreat with Established Business Owners

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33. 5 Reflections from My Retreat with Established Business Owners · WOC and Allies: Business and Career Realtalk with Elaine Lou Cartas

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: We heal in community.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure you agree with me.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_01: When you're in the right community, when you're in your chosen family, and I just finished hosting a two-day retreat for my Color Jeans Inter Circle client, which I host twice a year.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't want you to feel SOMO just because you couldn't go.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_01: So don't worry, I got you.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_01: In this episode, I'm gonna share five big reflections that can help both your business and life from the retreat I just hosted.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_01: And it's not just gems that came from me, but also beautiful gems that came from eight of my clients.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_01: So let's drop the beat.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_01: Hey legacy maker, I'm your host and MC, Elaine Lucartis, business and career coach for Woman of Color and Allies.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_01: And welcome to the Call Your Dreams podcast, where we have conscious conversations to help you create a business or career that is sustainable, abundant, and equitable to the lifestyle you deserve.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: Because our ancestors sacrificed so much so we could have this life of choice.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_01: Now, grab your coffee, tea, andor boba, and let's call your dreams to create your legacy.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: I just finished a two-day retreat.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_01: It's Call Your Dreams Inner Circle Retreat with eight of my clients.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: And it was based here in Los Angeles, California.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: Clients flew in from the Bay Area, Nor Cal, from even all the way from Boston.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_01: And what I love about being in community is how much healing and reflection can happen.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_01: We live in a world where there's so much screens we can be easily distracted, but there's so much power in pausing to reflect.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_01: So I want to create an episode about the five reflections from my retreat.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: And beyond just being a business and career coach for women of color and allies, I was born into community.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, we all are technically, you know, born into our family growing up.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: I had a grandmother who hosted events with Mahjong.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: For any of those that identify as Asian, you probably are familiar with Mahjong, which is an Asian version of poker.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_01: So my grandma would always host Mahjong events and just always had people over.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel like I get to do that in another level by hosting these events and retreats for my clients.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: And not only do I love being community because of how I grew up, but even in my past professional experience, I was a former grassroots organizer.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_01: I held community events, hosted events with elected officials as well as community leaders.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_01: And now I get to do it with my chosen family, with my clients.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_01: So the intention of the retreat was threefold.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: One, I shared with my clients in the beginning the importance of reflections.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_01: And I want to share this with you.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: So according to a study done by Harvard Business Review, and I'll link up the article in the show notes, just spending 15 minutes a day, 15 minutes a day actually increases productivity by 23%.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: So it increases productivity by 23% as well as happiness if you just pause and reflect for 15 minutes a day.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: And I got to do it for two days with my clients.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_01: They loved it so much that we went three hours over time.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_01: We were supposed to end at 5 p.m.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: Friday.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_01: That's a Friday night, right?
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_01: People say it until 8 p.m.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: That's because what's fascinating is at the end we we do something that I call reflective, like receive seats, where each of my clients, including myself, gets to sit and receive gratitudes and learnings that other people at the retreat receive from that individual.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_01: Because what I share with my clients is I am not the only expert here at this retreat.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_01: All of you are experts and we can learn from one another.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_01: So, first intention of the retreat, the importance of reflection, because it leads to productivity and happiness.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_01: Second, really wanted to focus on how small changes in our career as well as our personal life creates big changes.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_01: I'll share in my next episode, but I just had my best month in revenue.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: That's right, cash in the bank.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_01: In my five years in business in October of 2022, I have my best month in business.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_01: And I'll share more in my next episode.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: But I created small changes in my business, create the big changes.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: And you can listen to episode nine to why I ended my mastermind and at that process, but I was doing to simplify my business.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_01: My third intention was starting to create minimum, well, actually maximum, because I feel like when we put too much goals, it becomes too much.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_01: So creating three goals for 2023.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_01: And here was the hard part making sure one of them is personal.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_01: And I share that because living in this culture and society, we want all of our goals to be professional and career-wise.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_01: But I just wanted to make sure, hey, add the personal.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: So just like I shared, when I tell my clients, I'm not the only expert in this room.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: All of you are.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_01: There were so much huge takeaways and reflections from the retreat.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: There were five of them that I want to share with you.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_01: And I will obviously acknowledge the people that brought up these concepts, but the discussions that happened, it was just so profound.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: So the first big reflection is no mud, no lotus.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_01: Lotus, the beautiful flowers that you see that grow and open in water.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: Lotuses can't grow without mud.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: Shout out to Harpenter Mann, who is a yoga meditation teacher who shared this concept and actually led a yoga meditation session for us at a retreat.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: I'm also blessed and honored to have her as one of my Color Dreams Inner Circle clients.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: So this concept of no mud, no lotus is from Thick Nut Han.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_01: Actually, he has a book called No Mud, No Lotus.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: Highly suggest you read it.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_01: And also, if you are in the California area, he has a monastery that you can go visit.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_01: I have visited my best friend from college, it's called Deer Park Monastery in San Diego.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_01: But the concept is acknowledging the suffering that you may have gone through or maybe currently going through and how it leads to joy.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_01: One of my clients, Trisha, shares the importance of understanding shadow and joy and acknowledging and honoring the process, right?
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_01: We are meant to go through suffering to learn and grow from it.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_01: One of my clients who attended the event, she has a mother of six.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I was so humbled that she got to join my retreat because she came to my first retreat four years ago.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: Remember four years ago, she couldn't afford to work with me.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_01: It was hard.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: In fact, there was still a balance that she owed, and not even kidding, actually, she owed like$2,000.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_01: And then a month ago, I got this random Zelle payment of$2,000 from this person.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: Like, wait, this has to be a mistake.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_01: I forgot she owed me that amount.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: And then she called me, like, hey, I didn't think about you.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_01: I wanted to pay you back, but so much has changed and transformed.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_01: And she's about to end this year at$250K.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: And not only that is the love and support that she's giving to her own family, to her husband, to her six kids.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_01: I remember how she would share how she has a four-year-old, and every day she would wake up and dance with him or with her other son that I believe is 11.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_01: He loves airplanes and would get him pilot lessons, which is amazing.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: She had to go through that mud, and now she is in this beautiful lotus.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_01: Like she's one of the top 1% in real estate agents for the area that she lives in.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_01: So I wanted to share the concept of no bud, no mud, no lotus.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: And an action I want you to think of is reflect on past challenges, or even if you are going through a challenge right now.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_01: What did you learn from those challenges?
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_01: What do you think you're meant to learn from if you are going through a challenge right now?
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_01: So I want you to reflect on that.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_01: The second big takeaway got from the retreat is the importance of honoring your seasons.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_01: Shout out to Brenda Moreno, who is one of my clients, founder of Invisible Paradigms, does anti-oppression work, working with white allies.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: And we live in a world, a capitalistic society, where we're taught the importance of being in perpetual summer.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_01: But as I'm recording this, we are in fall, and I'm very jealous of Brenda because she lives in Boston, in the New England area.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_01: For anyone that lives, like where seasons happen, because I live in California, it's beautiful right now, right?
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_01: Fall, where the leaves are changing, probably slowing down, getting ready for the holidays.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_01: But just like the seasons of that, or even as women, if you're a female listening to this, or we have our seasons of our periods coming, right?
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_01: Honoring our seasons.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_01: Brenda shared about germination and growth.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: You're like germination.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: So she shared the concept of poppy seeds and how they're meant to be frozen for a little bit before they create poppies.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: Loved that story.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_01: Another thing I want to share, I was at a funeral a week ago, and the priest shared an example of how look, there's beautiful flowers in the back.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: But do you know how they were created?
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: They were created from dead flowers before them to create seeds.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_01: Then those seeds are planted to create the beautiful flowers that you see in front of us.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_01: So honor your seasons.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_01: And here's an action I want you to think about.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_01: How can you honor how you're feeling at this very moment when you're reading this, listening to this podcast episode?
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_01: It can be as simple as, you know what?
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm on my period E lane.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: It is day two, and I don't want to do anything, right?
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_01: Or maybe you feel overwhelmed.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_01: And because when this episode is coming out, it's around the post-Halloween.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, the holidays are coming coming up.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_01: And you don't know what Shmean girls, go do it because it's fetched.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_01: What can you do to honor how you feel right now?
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: A third reflection is the difference between happiness versus joy and understanding that.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_01: Shout out to Christine Joy Gonzalez.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_01: She's a yoga teacher and coach for men of color.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_01: You can follow her on Instagram at lead period with periodjoy.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_01: And she shared the concept of how happiness is external, right?
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: Like, oh, I want, even though yes, I'm doing this right now, I want a pumpkin sliced coffee, right?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: This is what makes me happy.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: But what is internal joy?
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: What is something you can do for yourself to feel good?
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe it's even like writing a gratitude letter or sending a text message to a family member or friend who held space for you.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_01: Or maybe it's not even doing something for someone, but it could be even, for example, I live in the past city in the Los Angeles area and I was walking around the rose bowl.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: That made me feel good.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_01: So a question I want you to ask is what brings you joy?
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: And an example is Christine shared at the retreat.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_01: What brings her joy is being in community and she's partnering up with local organizations to teach yoga and coaching.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_01: She's in the Bay Area.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_01: So if you're in the Bay Area, check out those events.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember a year ago we talked about this at her VIP day, and she just owned it.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_01: And this is actually an acronym she created with joy, just own yourself.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: And that's exactly what she is doing.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_01: So, an action for you when it comes to happiness versus joy.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_01: What can you do this week to bring you joy?
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_01: Even if you don't have it right now.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: So, for example, last week I had two onboarding calls with two new one-to-win clients.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_01: The night before, I knew that was gonna happen.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_01: I was extremely tired, but I knew, you know what, I'm feeling like I want to sign up for Soul Cycle.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_01: Because I knew it was gonna make me feel good.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_01: So I did it.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm so happy I did because the next day, knowing I had two onboarding calls, which are two hours each, oh, I had so much energy.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_01: I'm very grateful for myself for doing that.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_01: The fourth takeaway from the treat is who are you?
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_01: Who are you?
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: I know that's a hard philosophical question.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: And shout out to Kat McSayse.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_01: Kat is a former client and also my retreat manager.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: You can follow her on Saysei Experience on Instagram.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_01: But who are you?
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_01: She was having this discussion with one of my clients.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_01: And I also want to add to the who are you?
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_01: How can you be more you?
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_01: Christine Joy also was mentioning how that's one of her goals and tensions of how she could be more herself.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_01: Something in a personal, vulnerable way.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_01: And I need to probably get my therapist into one of these episodes, is the hardest part is separating your own unique voice to what your parents, society, and culture wants you to be.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: So often I ask my clients when there's a challenge that's happening, it's like, whose voice is that?
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_01: Is that yours or is that someone else's or society?
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_01: So do you know who you are?
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_01: And it's so important to remind yourself who you are.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_01: And it doesn't matter if you are a business owner or not, but who are you in all of your values and meaning?
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I also want to remind you, just in case you want to hear it, and I told this to one of my clients, you are worthy and you are enough.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_01: And by knowing who you are, it will lead to more clarity, more attraction to more joy, and knowing when to say no to opportunities that may not align to you.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_01: For example, I want to share two client wins that was discussed at the retreat.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: One, one of my clients actually signed a book deal and the publisher came to her.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_01: I remember she was kind of having imposter so you're like, they approached me, what happened?
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_01: And she I was like, why not?
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_01: You are worthy, you are enough.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_01: Another client, we were doing some social media marketing shout out to Matt, as well as my other client, Jenny Bells, who was doing some social media auditing to my clients.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_01: And she was sharing, I hate Instagram.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_01: So we were talking about like, okay, we'll do this, this, and this.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_01: But then she realized, wait, I'm a LinkedIn instructor.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_01: I've had people sign up for my email list on LinkedIn.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_01: And then we just asked her, so why do you need to use Instagram if that's not what you like using?
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: Why don't you just use LinkedIn?
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: Then we edited her LinkedIn to include in if you are a business owner and you have LinkedIn, highly recommend.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_01: But we edited her website URL on LinkedIn to put her call link because she has a 100% conversion rate to schedule calls.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_01: When she did that, one person already signed up for a call with her.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_01: And the reason why LinkedIn works for her is that she works with CEOs and C-suites when it comes to organizing.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: So knowing what brings her choice, who she is, who she works with, that allowed her to realize why do I need to waste time doing Instagram that I don't like when I could just do this on LinkedIn?
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_01: So here's an action for you right now when it comes to who are you and how you can be more you.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_01: I want you to reflect who are you right now?
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_01: And it's okay if you are different from who you were six months ago, a year ago, five years ago, high school, college, grade school.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: Who are you at this very moment?
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_01: Acknowledge and be grateful for who you have been before.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_01: And how can you be more of you right now?
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_01: The fifth takeaway, and also shout out to Brenda Barono.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_01: How are you being an independent scholar?
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_01: I never heard of the concept of independent scholar, but if you don't know what that is, it's also just being a lifelong learner.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_01: How can you learn more?
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: And not just another certificate or another degree because it's such a Western culture that you need all of this stuff to learn more, but what can you do to learn more and dig deeper?
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_01: Like one of my clients, so we had Lydia from the Pink Crow Shop, a former client of mine, lead a Reiki and Theta Healing session for my clients.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_01: We always do it for all my treats.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_01: And one of my clients was really saying, Oh my gosh, I need to go deeper into spirituality.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_01: And another client realizes whenever she goes on retreats or goes back to her motherland in India, she grows and deepens more.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_01: So, where do you feel called to learn more of whether it's skills, experiences, understanding, what can you do for yourself?
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_01: And I just want to go around and share what the five takeaways are again for the retreat that I just hosted.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_01: Just in case you want to hear it again.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_01: One is no bud, no bonus.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_01: Two, honor your seasons.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_01: We're not meant to be in summer all the time.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_01: Three, happiness versus joy.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_01: What are you doing to create joy for yourself?
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: Four, who are you?
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_01: And how can you be more you?
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_01: And five, what are you doing to be an independent scholar?
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_01: I just want to bring up this data again from the beginning of this podcast episode, according to Harvard Business Review, when you reflect for 15 minutes a day, you can increase productivity and happiness by 23%.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_01: So here's a reflective question for you.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_01: So we can increase your productivity and happiness by 23%.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'm going to take 15 minutes to journal any big takeaways that you received from this episode.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_01: And what is one action that you can do to be more you?
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_01: Legacy maker, if you're wanting to join the next retreat on April 27th and 28th, 2023, or maybe you just want to work with me and my team so you can be truly seen and heard.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_01: So that you can have a business that revolves around your life, so you can actually spend time with loved ones this holiday or any day.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_01: Schedule a complimentary 30-minute legacy business review call at ElaineLu.com forward slash call.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_01: During this 30-minute call, we'll identify your personal and professional goals you want to create and review your current pricing and packages and services or products to see what needs to be edited to fit your dream life.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_01: By the end of the 30 minutes, you're going to receive at least three individualized action items.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_01: So to schedule the complimentary 30-minute legacy business review call, go to lameboo.com forward slash call.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_00: So more women of color and allies can benefit too.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_01: And if you have one or two friends that would get so much from this particular episode, please share.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_01: The intention behind the Color Your Dreams podcast was to contribute and give back to our people.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_01: All right, we'll see you next Thursday for our newest Call Your Dreams episode.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_01: And don't forget to call your dreams too.