Latest / Connect Call / EP26 - Before You Trust the Treatment: Do Your Homework | Hannah Brett

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EP26 - Before You Trust the Treatment: Do Your Homework | Hannah Brett · Connect Call

• 0:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Good evening.
• 0:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Good day.
• 0:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Happy Monday.
• 0:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is probably not going to air in a Monday, but this is Hannah Brett high.
• 0:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: I am here, Hannah Brett for another episode of Connect Call, where I often say I do not have a clinical background.
• 0:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't have letters behind my name, although I do.
• 0:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: have the Ph.D. for picking up the phones for families in crisis, which I have done now for nearly 20 years, which is crazy.
• 0:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not crazy.
• 0:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's been actually, I thoroughly loved my job.
• 0:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: And over the past 20 years, I've had the, I've been very fortunate enough to work for some of the best treatment programs in the country.
• 0:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: And because of that, I have been able to talk to so many of you out there where you have been in need.
• 0:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe not for the treatment center that I am working for, but you've been in need for treatment for a therapist, a good psychiatrist.
• 0:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Should I bring my child to the ER or should I bring them to a stabilization unit in a site facility?
• 1:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: All these questions.
• 1:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: And
• 1:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Why I kind of started this show?
• 1:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, big reason why I started this show was I realized I was so much more than a marketer.
• 1:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: I am much more than that.
• 1:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm more of a connector, and I'm very proud of that in that I hold my job and those phone calls dear to my heart because of how important they truly, truly are, and because of that, I wanted to do a show, as I've said before, where I'm connecting you the viewer and the listener, to some of the best I have met across the country in the services that you're calling me for, right?
• 1:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: So I felt that this would be a great episode to do my solo on doing one's due diligence.
• 1:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Something that I have struggled with in the work that I do is I have found many, many, many times.
• 1:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I speak with families and loved ones where I don't feel as if you are truly doing your due diligence, right?
• 2:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what I mean by due diligence is this.
• 2:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you are looking at college for your child, right?
• 2:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to be looking at more than one school.
• 2:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to be definitely going to tour that school.
• 2:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to be on campus asking all the right questions and it's going to be so much more than the cost of that school, right?
• 2:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you are going to buy your first car or a car, you are going to go to a series of different
• 2:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: different lots to try different models out, different, you know, for men, you name it to this one, to that one, to try out different types of cars, to know how they're going to drive, how you feel driving the car, what is the safety measures taken for us, this car, all of these questions are going to be answered as well as how much is that car.
• 2:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, in the work that I do, I feel that and when I say the work I do, the work I do is trying to be on the other end of the phone when you're calling me because we're talking about you or a loved one whose mental health, their substance abuse, their life has been kind of taken over by
• 3:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: by being unwell, right?
• 3:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so what my job is and what those I hope you call like me is to find the right appropriate fit for you.
• 3:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that goes for everything.
• 3:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have had families call me like I said before for a therapist, local therapists that they may need a psychiatrist, even down to needing a family interventionist, what is a family interventionist?
• 3:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, do I need a transport?
• 3:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: What does a transport do?
• 3:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, and then we start looking at programs and why I felt like this episode was so important is I find a lot of the times, I don't have all members and all deciding members of said family on that phone call.
• 3:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I also find that the end result or what we are truly going to decide, let's say, I'm just going to give an example, looking at residential treatment for an adolescent sometimes you are being swayed by what you're seeing online, you know, if you see a pretty beach or if you see, you know,
• 4:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: kids, stock photos, kids laughing in the background and a decision is being made.
• 4:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Or you think because Johnny your next or neighbor had a very successful time at that program, then your child would also do very well there.
• 4:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm here to say none of that is not untrue, but you have to do your due diligence.
• 4:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's so important.
• 4:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: To me, this is just as important if not more than finding the next car.
• 4:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's a lot more actually, we're important.
• 4:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's just as important if not more than finding college.
• 4:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, I have a lot of families because the majority of my career I have worked with young adults and adolescent programs.
• 4:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of times I will have that situation where the family is taking said love one their kid out of college for a semester or more to go to treatment.
• 4:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: And their incentive or drive is still to get them back into school without them.
• 5:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: being okay per se or they want to date in a time of when that is going to be.
• 5:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: So they can return and write somewhere that their medical leave will be done on this date, which we can't, by the way, tell you that.
• 5:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: So what I really want to stress in this episode is kind of how families should really be doing their due diligence.
• 5:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now ideally it would be great if you found people like myself and some of my colleagues I work with who have been in this industry long enough who I would like to consider myself pretty ethical in that yes I've worked for many great programs but that doesn't mean that's a great program for your loved one.
• 5:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: So what I always ask my family should do on all the calls that I speak when I'm working for a treatment program if I'm speaking to a family member is I make sure they are looking
• 5:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: three's actually good, you know, and and three programs that they feel pretty confident in presenting if need be, you know, if if they are having their loved one make some sort of decision.
• 6:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, I have spoken about this.
• 6:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: I think on other episodes where we don't really love.
• 6:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: for the client going into treatment to have all the say so in this and why I say that is you know, I was 27 when I went to treatment.
• 6:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: I was technically an adult, but I wanted easier softer.
• 6:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 6:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: I was looking at beaches, horses,
• 6:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Those were the things that were important to me, not about if the staff were licensed.
• 6:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: If there was what was the ratio of staff to patient ratio, how often I'd be seeing a psychiatrist, those are the things I didn't care about.
• 6:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: And typically you won't find the adult or young adult or adolescent asking those questions or those things being important to them.
• 6:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: Hence why we ask that the decision makers, those who are on the phones with people like myself and the programs,
• 6:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: that you guys make the decision.
• 6:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not, we're not doing, you know, a bait and switch.
• 6:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're not trying to pull a fast one on anybody.
• 6:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're definitely not doing a snatch and grab in the middle of the night where some adolescents in the past have been taken into a program.
• 7:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: None of that goes, that's not how what I want in order I support.
• 7:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: What I am saying is that you, the decision maker, whoever that is, it could be the grandmother grandfather, it could be
• 7:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: the aunts, the uncles, it could be the parents.
• 7:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: It could be whoever is paying for treatment.
• 7:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: Please do your due diligence.
• 7:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what I mean by that is,
• 7:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: find out, so I'm hoping that you've gotten, we'll let's go with treatment centers first, right?
• 7:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: So ideally, you are getting recommendations from your therapist, your child's therapist.
• 7:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Let's just go with that.
• 7:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're going to go with an adolescent or young adult and we're going to get recommendations from the therapist.
• 7:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: That therapist is hopefully done their due diligence and they are going to recommend two or three programs.
• 7:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: First, I'd call those programs.
• 7:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'd make sure that I'd have the right questions there to ask at the end of this episode, actually, the show notes will have a list of questions that I love to use, especially when we're talking about young adults and adolescents.
• 8:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Questions that I think are important to ask your admissions person, making sure that asking how many full-time license clinicians and staff you have.
• 8:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Is there a psychiatric or aparen on staff that is seeing your loved one and how often do they see them?
• 8:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: How often does your treatment center?
• 8:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: The therapist that my kid gets, how often will they see this therapist?
• 8:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: Will I be able to speak to the therapist or is there a case manager or somebody else I'll be speaking to?
• 8:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Speaking about a family, is there a family program?
• 8:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: If so, what does that look like?
• 8:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do I have a family therapist I get to talk to?
• 8:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Is there a family liaison that will speak to me?
• 8:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are there times when I can come to visit and do family programming or the Zoom family programming sessions?
• 8:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: If it's a big program or even not, is there residential staff there to support the clinicians on staff and so on and so on and also this is something I do like to ask too because a lot of times when you go online, there's a lot of beautiful stock photos, you know.
• 9:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: these companies, the treatment centers spend a lot of money rightfully so to, you know, entice you with their website, but there's going to be a lot of you'll see activities in the background in these pictures.
• 9:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: So ask them what recreational activities are there, what are some things that my kid can do when they are
• 9:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a big fan of getting rid of the white walls in the exit sign.
• 9:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: So any kind of program you can bring your child to that is clinically appropriate forcent child, let's say.
• 9:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Also, it takes away this feeling that they're in treatment, right?
• 9:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: What medications are they allowed to be taking in treatment?
• 9:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: What treatment modalities are there?
• 9:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: for treatment for my child.
• 9:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: My child is tried, and you can say this for adults too, has tried the AA route, Alcoholics Anonymous, and they really haven't liked it.
• 10:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do you try other ways and other meetings for them to do in community at night or do the whole community have to go to AA meetings, even if they're bucking that process?
• 10:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: These are all really important things to ask.
• 10:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: Ask about how big the community is.
• 10:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm a big advocate for smaller is better.
• 10:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: I love a small milieu.
• 10:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: I think there's no price tag on that.
• 10:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: The smaller I believe, the more attention.
• 10:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's not the case that there's a lot of great programs out there that might be a bit bigger, but that means they've got to have more staff, right?
• 10:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: So I definitely think the really important question with that is, what is your staff to patient ratio?
• 10:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: Also, what is quote unquote done look like?
• 10:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, because as we know, and for those of you that don't, and this is the first episode, you are tuning into Connect Call.
• 10:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, thank you and welcome, and here we are.
• 10:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Please know this, whether it is mental health, whether it is substance use, whether it is, and by the way, just to remind viewers and listeners out there, all its substance abuse and abuse truly is.
• 11:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: And abuse is one of self-medicating for mental health and trauma untreated.
• 11:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: So you have to make sure that the programs you were calling are treating all of your loved one, right?
• 11:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know their programs out there that specialize in eating disorder.
• 11:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know there's the programs out there that specialize in trauma.
• 11:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is all great, especially if maybe there isn't any substance abuse going on.
• 11:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: per se.
• 11:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: But more than not, you will find what we call like the whack-a-mo game.
• 11:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if one's depression and anxiety is not being treated, or one's trauma, small trauma and big trauma, is not being treated, then they will, if they put the substances away, they will find something else to be addicted to, or find something else to treat as a coping mechanism, right?
• 11:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: on unhealthy coping mechanism for what's going on with them.
• 12:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: For instance, years and years and years ago, a lot of years ago, I think over 23 years ago, I went to treatment.
• 12:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the main thing that was being treated was my substance abuse, which was great.
• 12:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: I stayed sober.
• 12:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: But what happened was, in about...
• 12:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And some years ago, my depression came back and came back with a full swing.
• 12:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: And as many of you know from the other episodes I've talked about, I had to go back into treatment because my depression anxiety was never fully treated.
• 12:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: I wasn't on the right medication.
• 12:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: My depression anxiety wasn't really ever really looked at.
• 12:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: And there was this old school thinking that if the treat the substance abuse, then everything will be honky-dory.
• 12:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's just not the case.
• 12:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, there's a lot of people in this industry that I work with, unfortunately, who went to treatment many moons ago like myself and think that they've also been recovered and treated and I don't believe that's the case.
• 12:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, I believe that going back to us being done and finished and when do we graduate, you don't really graduate from this and that's not to scare people or
• 13:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: you think there's this doom and gloom that you'll never get better.
• 13:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: You actually do get better and so much better.
• 13:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: But to do that, you truly have to keep tabs on yourself and keep tabs on your mental health and make sure that you are taking care of yourself.
• 13:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: That if, you know, you did go to treatment many years ago for one thing that you're still taking care of your mental health, you know.
• 13:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so it is so important that we are doing our due diligence.
• 13:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: There's a lot of programs out there that are great and do really wonderful work.
• 13:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: But I just ask that everybody who tunes into this episode really knows how to do their due diligence.
• 13:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so here's what I, I don't recommend.
• 13:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, I don't recommend finding out from the neighbor where they went.
• 13:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so that must be the program that your child must go to.
• 13:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: I also don't recommend just calling one program because your insurance is taken by said program.
• 14:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: There are other programs that are in network with your insurance.
• 14:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: I would ask your therapist, either yours or your child's therapist.
• 14:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: If it's your child going to treatment, if it is you going to treatment, or even if it's somebody you know that is you heard are looking at treatment options, ask your therapist.
• 14:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: They should know a few.
• 14:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Trust me.
• 14:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: As a marketer, that's what we do.
• 14:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: We go out and market psychiatrists and therapists, schools,
• 14:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: churches, temples, we talk about the work we do.
• 14:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: And make sure that you are at least having two or three reputable treatment centers that are present.
• 14:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Try to stay away from Googling.
• 14:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Please also try to stay away from looking at reviews online.
• 14:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: Why I say this is
• 14:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: again, I'm just going to speak from what I know.
• 14:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: This isn't always the case, but again, working with adolescents in young adults who are privy to a computer, in treatment sometimes, they will go online and be upset that they're in treatment and write a bad review, especially without adolescents, you will find that time and time again.
• 15:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: So I've had many parents call me going, these reviews are bad.
• 15:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, yes, some of them are bad, and this is the reason why.
• 15:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not saying that's the case for all of them, but make sure if that's a part of the conversation that you are also, you know, make sure you can then ask said treatment center, hey,
• 15:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: If those reviews aren't correct or if you're all that you're saying is not true and that these are just grumpy kids because they don't want to be in treatment, do you have a list of families that I can call that you can recommend that I've come and have a success at your treatment center that would be happy to talk to me a little bit more from a parent standpoint how that how is it been for them.
• 15:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's always a great great option about doing your
• 15:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: or even as an adult going into an adult treatment center, ask if there's families or clients, patients that have gone through their facility that are happy to talk to you about their experience.
• 16:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: There's nothing better than one speaking on an experience they've already had in the treatment center.
• 16:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: They will answer all questions.
• 16:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just don't want any of you viewers and listeners out there to solely be just
• 16:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Although cost is important.
• 16:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: and location.
• 16:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's a big one.
• 16:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: I remember after COVID, you know, we were, in my opinion, not setting up a lot of our adolescents for success.
• 16:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what I mean by that is I found that we as adults really struggled during that time where we were working from home and working remotely and we weren't around our friends and we weren't around our colleagues.
• 16:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now we were asking our kids to do the same thing.
• 16:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: But then when it was over, we just threw them back into class.
• 16:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: You said, all right, we're not going to work up worry about your mental health through any of that.
• 16:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're just going to throw you back into class.
• 17:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: See how you do.
• 17:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's also the case where I often find that, you know, if they're the schools that have the shooter drills for unfortunately for all the mass shootings we're having now in our world, not in our world, in our country.
• 17:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: We have one of these shooting drills in elementary school and middle school and then we say, and high school and say, all right, go back to math, make sure you're doing well in physics 101 after you've just been hiding under a desk for about two hours.
• 17:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we don't set up them for success with their mental health.
• 17:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: We don't help them process that experience.
• 17:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what ends up happening is we have a lot of kids who are really struggling.
• 17:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have a lot of parents who will call me and they'll be very upset and very sad that their son or daughter is really struggling with their mental health and feel like they are so alone in this process.
• 17:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, oh.
• 17:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: but you are so not, you are so not.
• 17:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then they'll say, but when I was there age, none of us were dealing with A, B, and C. Yes, it was a different world than you and I grew up in.
• 18:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: First of all, that's one.
• 18:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Two is also, I wish.
• 18:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: as someone who did go to treatment at 27 years old, that someone did intervene on me at 16 or 17 because if someone had intervened on me properly at 16 or 17 and gave me DBT skills or introduced me to DBT skills and my therapist and my psychiatrist, then there's a possibility that I would have saved myself years and years and years of suffering.
• 18:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: So what we're actually giving these kids and adults, I just say to everybody
• 18:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: a good friend of mine and a brilliant admissions director once told me we're giving people an opportunity to be the best version of themselves, right?
• 18:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: So we are, you know, we are living in a different place, and so what I was trying to say,
• 18:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: see, was that when COVID kicked off, a lot of kids, a lot of adolescents were needing a lot of help.
• 19:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: And because of that, there were only set amount of adolescent programs in the country that had available beds at the time.
• 19:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so what I was finding when I was talking to parents was, well, I don't want to go to this facility, even though they do have availability, even though they're actually clinically so appropriate for my kid, would actually do really well for my child because they're in Colorado and I'm in New York.
• 19:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I would say, I know you don't want them in Colorado because you are in New York, but I'm also here to say, I can't find what you need exactly in the state of New York.
• 19:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: I wish there was, but there isn't.
• 19:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: So we also have to take that out of the mix as well and know that in doing our due diligence, which we will be doing this after this episode, I'm hoping, and therefore, that you will recognize that it's also not about the location.
• 19:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: I wish every location and every treatment center that I recommend to a family is in driving distance.
• 19:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: That would be so ideal, but it's just a lot of the times not the case.
• 19:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Every program I have worked for, I've worked for a facility here in Atlanta, I've worked for a facility in Connecticut, I've worked for facilities in Los Angeles.
• 20:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: all over.
• 20:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have gotten clients and patients from all over the country very rarely from their backyard and that is because they were some of the best in the country at the treatment they were doing for adults, for physicians, for pilots as well as for adolescents and young adults and the treatment spoke for itself.
• 20:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: So I will say again, you know, please do your due diligence, try to come up with two or three options, viable options that you feel very comfortable with because this is a huge investment everybody.
• 20:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is a big investment.
• 20:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'd like to also say that we live in a country, that the insurance that we all have,
• 20:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: will pay for all the treatment that you will be getting a lot of times that's not the case.
• 20:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if you have insurance and if you find a facility that's in network with your insurance, that means that once a deductible is paid by your insurance company, then the insurance will pay mostly for the rest of it.
• 21:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: And when I say the rest of it, they are fighting every day.
• 21:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: They have a whole team of people that are calling the insurance every day saying that this is
• 21:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: that maybe 30, 45, maybe 60, very likely will be taking care of, right?
• 21:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: But again, it's not normally the case.
• 21:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: So doing your due diligence is also about finding something that's cost-effective, but that you're really gonna ask those big questions as well.
• 21:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: What happens?
• 21:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's another good question.
• 21:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: What happens when my insurance runs out?
• 21:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then what happens?
• 21:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: How much is that?
• 21:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: What is the daily rate of care
• 21:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then for those families that are paying not using insurance, what is the average length of stay?
• 21:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then what does it look like afterwards?
• 21:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: I always like to have families ask about the afterwards because I'm also here to tell you that that first stage of residential treatment will be called the primary stay is just a piece of the puzzle.
• 22:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'd like to say that you can just go to that primary treatment 30 day.
• 22:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: solution or whatever.
• 22:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And by the way, I say this a lot.
• 22:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to say this again.
• 22:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: The 30-day model was I think it was roughly created by the military a long time ago because 28 days was their medical leave of absence and so treatment was kind of designed that way.
• 22:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: But there's really no documentation that says 30 days is it.
• 22:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: And by saying that I'm not saying that 30-day models
• 22:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And even if there's a 60 days, there's an after.
• 22:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: And even if there's a 90 days, there's an after.
• 22:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: I've told families the same way my mom told me when I said how long do I have to stay.
• 22:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: She would say how long is a piece of string.
• 22:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's kind of how you have to look at it.
• 22:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you have to also set yourself up financially for that as best you can.
• 23:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, definitely ask what is aftercare look like?
• 23:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Is it IOP intensive outpatient?
• 23:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: We haven't in an episode on that or partial hospitalization where that's also day treatment after treatment, is it extended living, sober living?
• 23:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, extended living and again, we haven't really talked about this is just kind of more structure than what you would find in a sober living.
• 23:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, um, we're going to be getting into that in more episodes that it's just another reason for you all to tune in.
• 23:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, but really, you know, please be prepared that this is never going to be a quick fix.
• 23:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, and, and that's okay.
• 23:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: The way you need to look at treatment, the best I guess I'm going to just the analogy I'm going to give again is college and university, right?
• 23:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if you're going to learn French, it's not going to take you 30 days to learn French.
• 23:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, it's, it's at least a semester, you know, because you're learning a new language, not only is your loved one learning a new language of how to cope, but you the family members are learning a new language.
• 24:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: So when doing your due diligence, please, please like have all the parties on the phone that you think are going to be a part of this process, especially the decision makers.
• 24:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes I will find if with my younger kids that I'm putting into treatment, I'll just have mom on the phone and I won't have dad or other mom on the phone or I'll have dad on the phone, but I won't have mom or the other dad on the phone.
• 24:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I need to have all parties that be, because you don't want to play the game of telephone after talking to me or anybody like me.
• 24:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Trust me, we'll get lost in messaging.
• 24:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: And
• 24:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is not a bad thing.
• 24:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is actually a good thing.
• 24:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's nothing to be sad about.
• 24:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: I would rather you come and be that person that I guess your mental health and your substance abuse has made you hit some sort of bottom, not too hard of a bottom, but a bottom where you hit the brakes and say, wait, we need help here, right?
• 25:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because
• 25:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm sure you can attest to this as well.
• 25:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: There's a lot of people out there that could really, really, really, really benefit from going to therapy, could really benefit from an antidepressant, could really benefit from even going to treatment, but don't and white knuckle it because they're able to just get by, but they're not happy people or they're not really, um,
• 25:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Joy is happy and free, you know, and so I feel that again, all of this is just an opportunity, nothing to be sad about.
• 25:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, again, you're not going to be skipping through my door or skipping on the phone with me.
• 25:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: Happy that we're talking, but please know that this is not.
• 25:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: this is not sad, this is not bad, this is a chance now, hopefully for you and a loved one that you care about so much to live this life worth living, and to protect this life worth living that they have, right?
• 25:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so I
• 25:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, I stress again at the end of this episode is I'm going to have a list of questions that I recommend that anybody can actually ask any admissions team when calling a treatment center.
• 26:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Make sure that, um, oh, here's another one.
• 26:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you are going on their website, hit the about page, hit the about page.
• 26:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you don't see staff with bios, that's a red flag.
• 26:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are there some red flags?
• 26:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Red flags also could be that they're not willing and ready for you to speak to somebody that has gone through their program that would be a red flag for me another red flag if they're willing to come get you give you a flight anywhere if any treatment center is saying we're going to fly you here or coming to get you that is also a big red flag.
• 26:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: We, the people that are set you up with these calls and them, the people that you're speaking to, should be able to recommend also two or three very licensed, very ethical and very good family interventionist as well as transport companies,
• 27:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: that are also licensed in credentials.
• 27:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, if you are speaking to those people, make sure to ask those people the same questions.
• 27:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have other families I can speak to that you have transported or you have intervened on and they've had success with you?
• 27:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Please do your due diligence because those of you out there that are spending the money on finding treatment for a loved one, finding an interventionist for a loved one, transport, you name it.
• 27:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: You want to, this is a lot of money at times.
• 27:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you want to make sure that you are asking all the right questions and that you are doing your due diligence.
• 27:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because here's what happens.
• 27:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this has happened time and time again for me.
• 27:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's been really unfortunate to hear.
• 27:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: I will get a family who's just what we call treatment exhausted.
• 27:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: they have been now through, let's say that's the average, of treatment stays or calls and nothing seems to be working, right?
• 27:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: But when you kind of do my due diligence and I look into their resume of programs, the majority of them have been chosen because so and so next door said they were good or
• 28:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: whoever was guiding them never told them don't dump all said means that you have into the primary stay that's another thing when you're doing your due diligence.
• 28:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Let's say you have $40,000 and this is all you have.
• 28:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is and most don't even have that.
• 28:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: But let's just say we have $40,000 for our loved one to go to treatment, right?
• 28:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: We don't want to give all $40,000 to that primary stay.
• 28:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: We want to make sure some of that money is going to be used for aftercare because that part of the puzzle is it's just as important I showed up really beautiful and treatment and that 30 days that I went too many years ago I showed up just like how Sandra bullet told me how to do it in 28 days I did it so well and then as soon as I was done with that program I convinced my mother you know mom I don't need I don't need to go to aftercare.
• 29:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not, let's have a this.
• 29:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: You live outside the United States.
• 29:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: You live in Cardiff Whales.
• 29:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: How much trouble can I get in there, right?
• 29:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so I convinced her for me to fly to her and I would be doing aftercare with her out of her house.
• 29:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll go to meetings,
• 29:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll do whatever she asked me to do, but that's where I will do my aftercare.
• 29:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, within three days of me being there, because I had already picked up on the fright before I went to the on the on the flight.
• 29:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: I actually called my drug dealer.
• 29:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I said to myself, if my drug dealer will meet me at JFK, then it's off to the races.
• 29:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: And guess what?
• 29:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: My drug dealer met me at JFK and it was off to the races.
• 29:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so when I got to this little area of whales called Cardiff,
• 29:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: where I thought, no, couldn't get in any trouble there.
• 29:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: So my mom can't get in trouble there.
• 29:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: This was a long time ago.
• 29:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: So mind you, we had blockbuster back then.
• 29:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I told my mom, I'm going to go into town and return to the blockbuster video.
• 30:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: As soon as I went into town, as soon as I landed, and we were off to the races.
• 30:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: So I stress this,
• 30:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: as a point of when you're also doing your due diligence, make sure you understand what you are paying for and making sure you do have some resources for after that primary stay that that loved one can also go to their next phase in recovery, that next chapter because it's not
• 30:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: It just isn't and just to expect someone to go into treatment for 30 days, learn something, like teaching them, okay, your whole life you've been coping in a really shitty way.
• 30:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: And now we're going to show you in 30 days how not to cope like that.
• 30:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're going to feel better because we're going to change your meds or even put you on medication in 30 days and you're going to feel better.
• 30:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: It just doesn't work out like that.
• 30:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: You have to
• 30:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Also be working with a treatment center that is going to be honest and open from the beginning that this is just a piece of the puzzle that this is what it will look like after the fact and ask all these questions, okay, so let's wrap it up with this let's remember here's some here's some bullet points I hope to take away is that we have and then again at the end of this episode and the show notes I will have questions that you can ask admissions for.
• 31:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whether you're looking for a therapist, a psychiatrist or a treatment center, make sure you have at least two to three.
• 31:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to say three options, especially with a therapist and a psychiatrist definitely have two options because you want to make sure the person that you are going with that you are speaking to they will do a consultation with you that you feel safe with you will have that feeling and you're got that I can get open with this person or I can.
• 31:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: make sure you do it there, because that is also important and can be costly as well.
• 31:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then with treatment centers, please make sure you have at least three options, and options that you were finding from respected referral sources, like if a therapist says, hey, call Hannah Brett, she'll give you some options.
• 32:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: she's marketed for some great programs and we'll talk about either programs that she knows and if she doesn't know those programs, which I don't know all programs in this country, I have fortunately built a network of great providers all around the country that if I don't know what's best, I'm going to call in your behalf and find out some programs for you to call, okay?
• 32:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: And make sure you're not just going by what your insurance company is giving you as a list of in-network providers.
• 32:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's important that we, if all you can do is go with what is in network and that is what you can afford.
• 32:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then with everyone you are speaking to or the first person you're speaking to that is recommended to you that takes your insurance.
• 32:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Make sure you stress this is my insurance.
• 32:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is what I can do.
• 32:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: I can only go in network.
• 32:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Can you please provide me with two other options that you think would be repeatable that I can use my insurance with.
• 33:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, but make sure you're not just going just by the sticker price.
• 33:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of times I have lost a lot of families because of false bells and whistles that other programs have promised and they have promised they promised sobriety they've promised.
• 33:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: recovery in 30 days, they promised, even that you can go back to drinking and drinking safely to, you know, just tons of promises.
• 33:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Again, nothing is free.
• 33:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do not go with a treatment center that is offering you free transportation anywhere.
• 33:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's a big, big, big, big, big no now.
• 33:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And also find out, God forbid, here's another good question, something go awry, right?
• 33:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: If your child or loved one does have a site episode of some sort, what is that process look like?
• 33:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Where do they go if they need to be removed from your facility to go to a safer stabilizing unit somewhere hospital nearby?
• 34:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: What will that process look like?
• 34:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, just ask more questions than not.
• 34:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is why I say this is, it may not be expensive now for you, but it will end up being more expensive than you ever expected because you've had the wrong placement.
• 34:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you are an adolescent young adult, you know, there's so many great providers out there.
• 34:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: There's therapeutic consultants.
• 34:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just had an episode with two of them on previously.
• 34:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: There's also,
• 34:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: interventionist that that family interventionist you can work with.
• 34:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: I've had a few on myself, you know, from Tudy Landry to Heather Hayes, great interventionist that will direct your family to the best treatment center, lean on them.
• 34:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: But for whatever you do, do not go based on just something you googled or something one facility that your buddy said was good because everybody's different.
• 35:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hope I was able to answer some questions here or stress the due diligence.
• 35:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: I think why it was also very motivated to do this episode was because recently I do not want to name names, but we have seen in the past few years a few high profile famous young men who have lost their battle to addiction and mental health.
• 35:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I won't blame the treatment center for that.
• 35:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: I won't blame any of the treatment stays per se.
• 35:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: But what I have found time and time again
• 35:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: especially if you have the means and the finances, there are people out there, there are unfortunately treatment professionals out there that we call them the ring the bell mentality, which is if you don't like what one of us say you're just going to go to the next one and the next one's going to be telling you can do whatever you want with them because they're happy to take that paycheck.
• 35:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's why I also really stress doing your due diligence.
• 36:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's really, really important because the good people out there are not going to always tell you what you want to hear.
• 36:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: And most of the time they're not going to tell you what you want to hear, it's what's best for you.
• 36:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 36:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: So that's another episode of Connect Call, please tune in next week.
• 36:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: Just keep tuning in.
• 36:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: We love having you.
• 36:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we're out.
• 36:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for tuning into this episode of Connect Call.
• 36:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: As we conclude, remember that insights shared are intended for informational and educational purposes only and should not substitute professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
• 36:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: We strongly recommend consulting a qualified medical health professional or health care provider for personalized advice tailored to your unique needs.
• 36:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Your mental health journey is important and having the right support is essential.
• 36:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you're experiencing a mental health crisis or require immediate assistance, please reach out to a mental health provider or emergency services in your area.
• 36:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're grateful to have you as part of our community and your well-being remains our priority.
• 36:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: So follow us on social media to stay connected and be sure to catch one of our episodes on our YouTube channel.
• 37:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're here to support you every step of the way.