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The Upper Limit Problem in Real Estate Investing w/ Paul Salter · Real Estate Investing with RealDealCrew

• 0:00
  Most investors don't sabotage their growth because they lack tactics.
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  They sabotage it because some part of them doesn't feel safe at the next level.
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  There's a psychological phenomenon called the upper limits problem,
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  and it explains why so many investors stall right before a breakthrough.
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  The indecision that shows up out of nowhere,
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  The second guessing, the sudden abandoning of the fundamentals that
• 0:26
  got them there in the first place.
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  In this episode, high performance hypnotherapist Paul Salter breaks down
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  why your subconscious will quietly pull you back down to a level that feels
• 0:38
  familiar, even when you're logically doing everything right.
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  You'll learn what's actually driving that self-sabotage,
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  a simple daily practice that can raise your floor and make the next level feel safe,
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  And why the relationships around you often shift the moment you start
• 0:56
  to outgrow them. If you want help building systems that support this kind
• 1:01
  of growth in your investing business,
• 1:03
  you'll find more information at RealDealCrew.com.
• 1:08
  Let's get started.
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  Paul Salter joins me here today.
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  You can learn what he can help you with through his podcast.
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  Paul, l let's give everybody a heads up on your podcast right away so that they
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  can find you, and then I will have that as a clickable link in the show notes
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  as well.
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  The unstuck high performer podcast available on Apple,
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  Spotify, and all other major platforms.
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  So let's let's give people a quick short version of your story and how
• 1:37
  did you go from performance coaching and hypnotherapy into working with high
• 1:43
  performers?
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  Happily. So again, my name is Paul Salter.
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  I am a high performance hypnotherapist and mindset coach.
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  And I primarily work with CEOs,
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  executives, entrepreneurs, and ambitious professionals who are stuck,
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  continuing to find themselves in these patterns of self-sabotage.
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  And the work I do primarily uses hypnosis to help these high-performing individuals.
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  really uncover and then unlearn the destructive patterns of believing,
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  thinking, and behaving that are holding them back from their potential.
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  And it sounds strange to say out loud to me,
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  this is year 17 that I have been coaching.
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  My coaching background began as a sports dietitian,
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  immediately working at the collegiate professional and olympic level,
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  helping professional and Olympic athletes maximize their potential.
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  And after a few years there, I shifted more into the sustainable weight loss niche,
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  helping men and women who were stuck in the yo-yo dieting cycle,
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  stuck losing and regaining the same 20 to 40 pounds over and over again,
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  really lose that weight and keep it off by taking an inside out approach,
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  meaning losing and unlearning the beliefs and the emotional baggage that
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  was holding them back. And after a decade or so doing that,
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  I took a little pivot.
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  I played poker professionally for a couple of years.
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  And this was for the first time in my life where I really came up against
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  my own limiting beliefs, a poor,
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  negative, scarcity laden relationship with money,
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  a lack of confidence, difficulty navigating challenge.
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  So I hired a mindset and performance coach who happened to be a hypnotherapist.
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  And not only did she have a phenomenal impact on my poker playing,
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  the amount of money I played for,
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  the amount of money I earned.
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  The impact on me as an individual was so profound.
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  It felt like an obvious evolution to walk away from poker,
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  phase out the nutrition coaching I was still doing,
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  double down on the mindset coaching work I was already doing,
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  grab my credential as a hypnotherapist,
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  surround myself with people who were far brighter,
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  far more experienced to accelerate my learning curve.
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  And I haven't looked back since.
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  Yeah, I appreciate you giving us that insight.
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  And and it's it's always interesting to hear that frankly you were experiencing some
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  of the same challenges that people experience.
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  Like it it is it's it is kind of reassur reassuring in that regard.
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  Could you it seems like and maybe it's more my like my generation too,
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  like the the whole working on yourself,
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  working on your mindset
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  What are some of those misconceptions that you repeatedly run into,
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  especially in the with real estate investors?
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  Also stereotypically, most men,
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  and I say this because I've been there,
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  see asking for help or looking inward or needing some form of support,
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  accountability, and coaching as a sign of weakness.
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  Vulnerability is seen as a weakness.
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  I can figure it out myself. I can be stubborn and find a way.
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  And if I can't find a way, I will run myself into the ground until I do
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  or until I break. And that is
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  Just old patterning that was passed on from you know their father,
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  their grandfathers, etc. And really the mistake I see is
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  so many high-performing individuals,
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  both men and women, are suffering in silence.
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  They are plagued by anxiety,
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  overwhelm, worry, uncertainty,
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  fear, imposter syndrome, constantly guessing:
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  am I capable? Am I worthy?
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  But they're so disconnected from themselves because they've learned how
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  to numb and avoid all of those uncomfortable feelings by working more,
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  by pouring themselves more into their work.
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  And what inevitably happens far too often is that individual wears their tenacity,
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  their ambition, like a badge of honor.
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  They brag about working 70, 80 hour weeks.
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  They brag about all of the deals they're closing and all of the money
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  in their bank account.
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  But they're incredibly disconnected from their wife or their husband,
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  incredibly distant from their children,
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  incredibly disconnected from themselves.
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  And inevitably, some type of challenging event occurs or they run themselves into
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  an emotional implosion or rock bottom.
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  And not to say it's too late, but most of that could be avoided had they found
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  the courage and the supportive environment to ask for help.
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  Yeah, I can understand that. You know,
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  in fact I I even go as far as the saying that when we do this we
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  go down this entrepreneurship road,
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  it's it's actually kinda lonely.
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  Like it is one of those things that we just kind of battle these these monsters,
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  if you will, on our own and we just kind of plow ahead.
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  It's
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  It it really helps if especially if you have somebody to talk to or somebody like
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  i like even a close friend in some ways.
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  I think a lot of that kinda gets pushed to the wayside where it's probably needed
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  the most.
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  I agree. And what's interesting is like there's no true internal psychological
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  blueprint for the entrepreneurial journey.
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  There's plenty of blueprints for how to scale your business,
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  how to become an excellent real estate agent,
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  broker, or investor. But we get into the mind of how to achieve next level success
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  and how to sustain it. Every single one of us has our own unique.
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  Programming, our own unique relationship with money,
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  beliefs about success. Am I worthy,
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  deserving? Am I capable? And all of those beliefs are completely unique
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  to our own experiences. So we can sit there even and surround ourselves with some
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  great like-minded individuals who are who are performers who are ambitious.
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  But if we don't talk about how we're feeling,
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  we're going to continue to internalize that isolation and
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  At the end of the day, what we continue to repress is an im is inevitably gonna show
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  up in one way or the na another.
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  Yeah, you've said most experienced people aren't missing tactic tactics,
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  but they're they're stuck in a pattern.
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  This is kind of one of this is the other side of the double edged sword that
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  I speak about because I find that I need to maintain a certain level
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  of momentum in order to make sure that I'm I'm producing or or
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  doing those money generating activities on a on a regular and consistent basis.
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  But what you say you're basically bringing up a very strong thing
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  is that that momentum can actually be in in the wrong direction or s
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  in some cases holding you back because it's just a habit or a pattern.
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  Can you talk a little bit
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  Yeah.
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  about that?
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  Absolutely. I mean, when we talk about number of deals closed,
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  number of relationships built,
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  number of dollars in our bank account,
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  numbers are so easy for us to work with,
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  to see, to tangibly experience more,
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  you know, money in the bank account supposedly is gonna mean a better life
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  or more happiness, more love, more fulfillment.
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  But what happens is, and so many people listening,
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  I imagine can relate is their identity becomes enmeshed in their results.
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  Their self-worth and self-esteem is a direct byproduct of their results,
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  deals closed, investments successfully executed,
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  or dollars in the bank account.
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  And ultimately what's happening is there is a program that has come
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  to the surface that is more or less beginning to show up as I am only worthy if.
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  There's a lack of feeling of I'm worthy,
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  I'm deserving. And that could be of attention,
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  of love, of connection, of belonging.
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  And what's really unique is, you know,
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  when when we dig into the past of individuals,
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  you know, and I could cite countless clients of mine who are agents and investors,
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  where they were, for example, one of many siblings.
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  And
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  You know, I'm the oldest of four,
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  and I know very well that once my little brother was born,
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  I went from a hundred percent of mom and dad's attention to fifty percent,
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  and it just kept lessening and lessening as more siblings came.
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  So what happens in childhood, especially when we have a sibling or a few,
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  is we have to find creative ways to stand out,
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  to still get mom's attention, dad's attention and affection,
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  because every single one of us has core needs to feel like we belong,
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  we're accepted, we're connected,
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  we're worthy of love.
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  And so for a while, maybe a pattern of perfectionism,
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  of standing out, doing well, going above and beyond is how you get those core needs
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  met. And we see that then develop into adulthood as a tenacity and ambition.
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  But what begins to bubble under the surface is if you have a bad month,
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  you have a poor quarter, you begin to feel negatively about yourself.
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  And perhaps you might try to take a shortcut here.
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  You might overlook.
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  Your health, your well-being, the key relationships in your life,
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  because you think if I just close one more deal or I sign one more client,
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  then I'll feel okay. And as you continue on this pattern,
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  you mistake motion for the sake of motion of moving you in the direction you desire.
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  You're still moving, you're going,
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  you're doing, but you're getting so far off track from that original path
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  you plan to take, you inevitably run yourself into the ground.
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  That makes a lot of sense and it actually echoes some things that I've noticed
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  as well. We have a tendency, you know,
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  I I run run into a lot of small business owners and you know we we do do that.
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  We brag about how busy we are,
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  but then we don't take assessment of exactly what we're busy with.
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  And being a little bit more mindful of of some of that.
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  And you were about to say something?
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  No, just completely agreeing with that.
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  And I think I I'll add and let you continue,
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  of course, is that that's because slowing down is uncomfortable,
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  scary, foreign, perceived as a threat.
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  If I slow down, I'll miss out,
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  I'll fall behind. And that just perpetuates the issue.
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  Yeah. No, it it makes it makes a lot of sense.
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  The one of one of the things that I was hoping that you could s spend
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  a little time with too is that based on what you're saying here,
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  if we could tie that directly with how
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  how not taking care of this to in this way,
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  how it could even negatively impact certain aspects of real estate and investing,
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  whether it's negotiation or teamwork or team development
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  or or building a community within your in your world.
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  Like how does the let's give some direct ties to to the impact there.
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  Yeah, of course. A simple relatable example,
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  there's this psychological phenomenon known as the upper limit problem.
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  And this is basically an unconscious limit that we place on ourselves around,
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  you know, how much money we can make.
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  So if somebody listening right now has a seven figure portfolio and
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  is trying to scale to an eight figure portfolio,
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  a nine figure portfolio, it's likely that as they begin to approach that next self
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  perceived threshold.
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  They might begin to find themselves victim of patterns of sabotaging behavior.
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  And what I often find is when someone is on the verge of breaking through
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  to that next level, indecision begins to appear.
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  Apprehension, uncertainty, second guessing,
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  a sudden abandoning of the fundamentals that drove that level of success
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  in the first place.
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  So what happens here is these micro forms of self-sabotage begin
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  to appear because that next level of success,
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  you know, crossing to the eight-figure,
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  the nine-figure level of their portfolio is seen as a threat.
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  Because underneath all of that,
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  you know, despite logically saying,
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  of course I want to grow my portfolio,
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  duh, that's what I'm doing all this for.
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  But underneath all of that, there's a core belief I'm not worthy,
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  I'm not deserving, or I'm not capable.
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  Who am I to have so many
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  Tens or hundreds of million dollars in assets.
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  There's a deep core belief and c and complementary fear that's present that
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  the closer they get to that level,
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  the more they begin to undo their success,
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  which brings them back down to a level of familiarity.
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  And this coincides with what exactly the subconscious mind is designed to do,
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  to keep you safe.
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  So by bringing you back down to that level of familiarity,
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  your subconscious knows, hey, this place is familiar,
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  it's predictable, it's comfortable,
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  you're safe here. But going to that next level,
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  that's foreign. That's a threat.
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  Absolutely not. So we see it show up in the indecision around deals,
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  the uncertainty, the second guessing.
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  But then we bring it into leadership too.
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  It can be failure to delegate.
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  It can be ineffective communication,
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  and it can be ineffective building of a culture or setting a team member
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  or teammate up for success.
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  And sometimes when viewed under a microscope,
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  these one off instances may appear like they are just that,
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  one off instances. But when we take a big step back,
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  we begin to see these one off instances occurring more and more frequently,
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  which add up to pack a very powerful punch of self-sabotage.
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  Yeah, I'd like to ex take a moment and and explore this a l just a little
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  bit more because I think we all are victims of it and maybe it's maybe it's
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  the upbring bringing associated with our jobs and we kind of expect and
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  we kind of tolerate the the three percent increments.
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  But you rarely see people slide back once they start to make a certain amount.
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  They kind of they becomes that becomes the new ceiling or the new standard.
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  Like
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  Can you talk a little bit about the strategies or something that we
• 15:06
  can maybe take away here today where we can maybe even in a in a small sense break
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  through that that mental ceiling to to realize that maybe we can we can do
• 15:17
  we can we don't have to settle for the three percent increase.
• 15:21
  Absolutely. So the key point here is you need to raise your floor.
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  And really what's occurring in this is you're creating a sense
• 15:28
  of psychological safety. You're you're helping like literally your nervous system
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  feel safe going from a seven-figure portfolio to an eight-figure portfolio.
• 15:37
  So one of the most effective action steps somebody listening can take today
• 15:43
  is to begin a practice of daily silence,
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  stillness, and solitude.
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  10 minutes a day sitting in silence,
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  no phone, no social media, no email,
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  not even a dog, a significant other or children.
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  And the reason this is so powerful,
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  and there's candidly there's multiple reasons,
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  is but like today, there are so many people and so many factors competing
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  for our attention. It's very challenging to find this stillness,
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  this silence, this quietude to go inward and connect with ourselves.
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  And
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  What happens as we continue to pair this ever-present distraction alongside
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  our tenacity to go, go, go, again,
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  we begin to fall victim of mistaking any type of motion as productive motion,
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  but we continue to get further and further off track.
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  So what happens here is this daily practice of silence and solitude,
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  it allows us to connect with ourselves,
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  to recalibrate and realign, to double check as we continue to take inventory.
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  Am I showing up as the man or woman I want to be?
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  Am I showing up as the man or woman that is going to allow me
• 16:46
  to accomplish my goals? And through this quiet,
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  we're able to connect more importantly with our deepest,
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  highest self, our intuition, the universe,
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  God, whatever your flavor or your verbiage is.
• 16:59
  And there's a really great quote I heard on this that goes like this
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  The voice of your subconscious mind is silence.
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  Your subconscious mind is home to your memories,
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  your emotions, your beliefs, your habits,
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  your patterns. So by being able to slow down,
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  you can cultivate a much clearer look about where perhaps you're feeling some
• 17:20
  uncertainty, where perhaps you're noticing some inklings of self-sabotage.
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  And you can better, more effectively and proactively course correct so that when
• 17:29
  you do then come up at that threshold,
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  you have that breakthrough. You're still connected and aligned,
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  and you're much
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  more likely to cultivate that sense of safety at that next level.
• 17:41
  No, I appreciate you saying all of that.
• 17:43
  before we go any further, I wanna make sure that we call out your podcast again.
• 17:48
  Can you can you give everybody that?
• 17:50
  because you can find that on all platforms.
• 17:52
  Yes, the unstuck high performer podcast.
• 17:55
  And if you found some value in what we're chatting about so far today,
• 17:58
  do us a favor, share this with one of your investor friends.
• 18:01
  And if you're watching us on YouTube,
• 18:02
  give us a like and subscribe. So here's one of those things,
• 18:06
  Paul, that I think we we should we should decide on.
• 18:09
  You know, we're not the only ones that are going to experience
• 18:13
  this this mental change, right?
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  This mindset change. We have friends,
• 18:17
  family, they're always looking out f what's bet what they think is best for us.
• 18:21
  But typically you are gonna have people in your life that when you start to grow,
• 18:27
  they start to get uncomfortable and now you have to deal with that.
• 18:31
  Like what what do you suggest people do there?
• 18:34
  Well, candidly, it's part of life because we are all biologically wired to belong,
• 18:40
  to seek acceptance and connection.
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  It's difficult to remember that,
• 18:45
  you know, first and foremost, as human beings,
• 18:47
  we're a community-centric tribal species.
• 18:49
  Thousands of years ago, if we were rejected or abandoned by our tribe,
• 18:53
  we literally died. So we can now bring this back into the present day.
• 18:57
  Those same types of threats, that saber-toothed tiger or starvation,
• 19:00
  aren't the same threats we face.
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  Yet we still st experience that visceral fear of abandonment.
• 19:06
  So we could take now, you know,
• 19:07
  five agents at a brokerage and one starts going the right direction,
• 19:11
  closing more deals, bringing in more money.
• 19:13
  Maybe he or she begins to exer experience some passive aggressive remarks,
• 19:17
  must be nice. Maybe they don't get the invitation to the social hour,
• 19:21
  the happy hour, the lunch invitation.
• 19:23
  And there's all these little passive petty forms of envy.
• 19:26
  Jealousy and resentment that they may begin to experience between that dynamic
• 19:31
  of peers they once belonged. So,
• 19:33
  what happens more often than not when someone is unaware of these types
• 19:37
  of patterns and propensities is an individual who starts having success will
• 19:41
  experience that undercurrent of envy,
• 19:44
  resentment, jealousy, and start to dim their light,
• 19:47
  start to play small to come back to that zone of comfort.
• 19:50
  So the message here is if you are noticing that you are starting
• 19:54
  to outgrow your tribe.
• 19:56
  Candidly, one of your skills you need to develop as you go and grow
• 20:00
  is the ability to edit or eliminate relationships.
• 20:05
  And I'll be the first to acknowledge that can sound harsh,
• 20:08
  it's difficult, it's uncomfortable,
• 20:10
  but I'll also tell you it's rewarding because it allows you to continue
• 20:13
  to stay in alignment with who you are,
• 20:16
  who you want to be, where you're going.
• 20:18
  And I can tell you too, from firsthand experience,
• 20:20
  there's a whole nother tribe waiting for you on the other side of being true
• 20:24
  to yourself.
• 20:25
  Yeah, it's it's it's one of those things that I've I've found that
• 20:29
  and you probably have seen this a lot,
• 20:32
  you know, anytime that there is any kind of change,
• 20:35
  it's it's it can be a very painful process,
• 20:38
  not only for yourself, but for for those individuals.
• 20:41
  And it's almost a fight or flight mentality where we're we we typically don't wanna
• 20:47
  face it, we don't wanna deal with it,
• 20:49
  and we will do anything to avoid that level of pain.
• 20:54
  Yeah, and a good analogy is like think of yourself tethered to
• 20:57
  an important person in your life.
• 20:59
  You're tethered together by a rope and you're both climbing this mountain together,
• 21:02
  this mountain of life. If you keep climbing and that person stops,
• 21:07
  inevitably there's going to be immense tension created on that rope.
• 21:10
  And if you want to keep going,
• 21:12
  you either have to keep doing what you're doing and drag that person with you.
• 21:16
  And hey, maybe they'll pick up,
• 21:17
  they'll catch on, you'll motivate and inspire them,
• 21:19
  or you got to cut the rope.
• 21:21
  Yeah, and like you said, it's it's not an easy thing to to do or it's
• 21:26
  not an easy thing to come to that realization,
• 21:29
  but there is such a thing as as toxic relationships when it comes to that type
• 21:35
  of thing.
• 21:36
  There is.
• 21:37
  You know, I'm I'm gonna kind of be a little vulnerable here because I've I've
• 21:40
  and I've shared shared it with the audience before is that I have
• 21:43
  a tendency of battling that negative self-talk and I so I kinda find
• 21:49
  it that I'm drow constantly having to drown it out with positive podcasts
• 21:55
  and audiobooks, and so I'm just constantly listening to different things.
• 21:59
  Do you have other strategies to help with something like that?
• 22:02
  So I can speak directly to you and ask a couple of questions in return,
• 22:05
  or I can speak generally. What do you prefer?
• 22:08
  I'll leave it to you.
• 22:10
  Well, I'll speak generally and allow you to chime in with your personal story
• 22:13
  as you see fit. What I have observed is,
• 22:15
  you know, candidly, we all have some variation of this harsh inner critic,
• 22:19
  that version of ourselves that says,
• 22:21
  you know, you suck, you're not worthy,
• 22:22
  why bother? It'll never work, or who is incredibly critical on the results
• 22:26
  or lack thereof that we experience.
• 22:28
  More often than not, as we go deeper and deeper,
• 22:31
  what I have observed, you know,
• 22:33
  coaching thousands of individuals,
• 22:35
  is there's a deep seated belief.
• 22:38
  Of I'm not enough. I'm not worthy.
• 22:41
  I'm not deserving. And that voice,
• 22:44
  that inner chatter that grows louder from time to time is just simply
• 22:49
  a byproduct of that belief. So the work that needs to be done is examining when,
• 22:56
  why, and how you began to believe you weren't worthy,
• 22:59
  deserving, or capable. And when we do the work to unlearn that belief.
• 23:04
  We often find that that chatter grows significantly quieter and comes around
• 23:09
  far less often.
• 23:11
  Hmm. Well, I I appreciate that insight.
• 23:13
  I was hoping in the last few minutes that we have here together,
• 23:17
  we could spend some times talking about some success stories.
• 23:22
  I'm sure that you have some primary examples of working with somebody
• 23:26
  and where they started and where they are today.
• 23:29
  Yeah,
• 23:29
  happy. So in the investment realm,
• 23:31
  you know, I have a client of mine.
• 23:32
  He is the youngest of four. And all this background story is important.
• 23:36
  It'll make sense in a moment why I share it all.
• 23:38
  He's the youngest of four. All boys,
• 23:40
  all of his older brothers were incredibly smart,
• 23:43
  great academically, even better athletically.
• 23:45
  Dad had a military background,
• 23:48
  dad was an entrepreneur, dad was that stereotypical man's man,
• 23:52
  always going, didn't show emotion,
• 23:54
  emotionally constipated, if you will.
• 23:56
  So this boy, James,
• 23:59
  The youngest of four struggled to stand out.
• 24:02
  How do I get attention? How do I keep up?
• 24:04
  All my brothers get all this attention.
• 24:06
  I'm going in the car to all of their events,
• 24:08
  following mom and dad to them.
• 24:10
  He felt like he was always left out.
• 24:12
  So what inevitably happened is one day he decided that he has to go above
• 24:17
  and beyond to stand out and get recognition from his dad.
• 24:21
  And as we've unpacked our journey together,
• 24:23
  that's all that little boy wanted was to be seen.
• 24:26
  By dad to get dad to feel proud of him,
• 24:29
  to feel he was worthy in dad's eyes.
• 24:31
  So James, as a result, developed a phenomenal work ethic.
• 24:35
  He too, straight A's, top of his class,
• 24:38
  incredibly gifted in the sports he played,
• 24:40
  went on to college, joined the military,
• 24:43
  joined the special forces branch of that particular division of the military.
• 24:46
  So, you know, on paper, you know,
• 24:48
  due to special forces in the military,
• 24:51
  he's checking all these boxes.
• 24:53
  Still incredibly unfulfilled, unhappy,
• 24:56
  always doing, always going. He retires after a 20-year career,
• 25:00
  where the last of last 10 of which he's been getting into real estate investing.
• 25:04
  He's had got a couple properties under his belt.
• 25:06
  He's got a couple multifamily units.
• 25:08
  And by the time he retires, he's got a portfolio of over 50 million dollars.
• 25:12
  He's coaching other real estate investors and working with various agents
• 25:16
  in different capacities. Completely addicted to his work,
• 25:21
  not married.
• 25:23
  No kids, very few relationships,
• 25:25
  always has his guard up. And through some very candid conversations,
• 25:30
  despite all the money under his name,
• 25:32
  despite all of the external success,
• 25:34
  he was unhappy, unfulfilled, running on fumes of anxiety,
• 25:39
  stress, and fear. And if anything,
• 25:41
  his relationship with his dad was even more distant.
• 25:44
  So this success story isn't about more money in the bank.
• 25:48
  It was about how we got to.
• 25:50
  really understand how this need to prove myself energy,
• 25:54
  I don't feel worthy enough energy,
• 25:57
  it allowed him to develop the success he had now,
• 26:00
  but it was not the fuel source that was going to get him to the next level.
• 26:03
  It was not the fuel source that was going to create an opportunity
• 26:06
  to bring a significant other in his life,
• 26:08
  to slow down and even have time,
• 26:10
  space, or thought for a family.
• 26:12
  So through our work together, we've been able to start cultivating a sense
• 26:16
  of safety slowing down.
• 26:19
  A definitive skill of becoming not only emotionally aware,
• 26:23
  you know, the big big upgrade here was going from emotionally avoidant
• 26:27
  to emotionally aware, to emotionally accepting,
• 26:30
  beginning to understand it's safe to show and feel emotion as a man,
• 26:34
  which has directly translated into his ability to lead
• 26:37
  and effectively communicate with his team,
• 26:40
  where now a year later, he's not nearly as hands-on.
• 26:43
  He's taking care of himself. And by the way,
• 26:47
  his business continues to grow.
• 26:49
  But he's spending significantly less time there and he's
• 26:51
  out building relationships and leaving a positive impact in his community with
• 26:55
  all the time he now has available to him.
• 26:57
  And if all that sounds great to you,
• 26:59
  you probably need to talk to Paul.
• 27:01
  why don't you give him them everybody your podcast again,
• 27:06
  Paul, or where they could reach you directly.
• 27:09
  Happy to. So again, I'm the host of the Unstuck High Performer podcast.
• 27:13
  If this conversation has resonated with you or one on my episode one
• 27:17
  of my episodes does, there's always a link in the show notes
• 27:20
  to apply from one-on-one private coaching.
• 27:22
  And then from a social media perspective,
• 27:24
  at the Paul Salter on Instagram,
• 27:27
  TikTok, and YouTube.
• 27:29
  And well, if you unless there is anything else we should have hit on,
• 27:32
  Paul, we'll jump into the rapid fire questions.
• 27:35
  I always find it interesting to I'm gonna ask you directly,
• 27:38
  Jack. Like, you know, you hear hypnotherapy,
• 27:41
  hypnosis, you know, you've been in your respective space for a very long time.
• 27:45
  You have dedicated a significant portion of your life to self development
• 27:49
  and improvement. Where does hypnosis,
• 27:51
  when you hear that word, what comes up for you?
• 27:53
  Because I imagine that same experience is likely similar for your audience.
• 27:58
  Well, I I hate to say this but the first thing that comes to mind is the
• 28:02
  is the live shows we you'd go to and people are being told act like chickens
• 28:08
  and stuff. Like you know, that's that's the first thing that comes to mind.
• 28:12
  I know that there is some some power associated with it,
• 28:17
  but I haven't experienced it directly myself.
• 28:21
  And and to be honest with you,
• 28:23
  Paul, sometimes I find that you know,
• 28:25
  I've even heard of people being recessed back into past lives and stuff.
• 28:31
  I have to say that a lot of that stuff i I think is it gets a little
• 28:34
  far fetched to me. But I kinda understand the subconscious aspects
• 28:39
  of what you're talking about.
• 28:41
  Yeah, I'm so glad you shared that.
• 28:42
  And I appreciate the candor because I think it is an opportunity just
• 28:44
  for great education. Because I agree,
• 28:46
  the first time I heard of it, I'm like,
• 28:47
  okay, is this person gonna dangle a pocket watch in front of me,
• 28:50
  get me to cluck like a chicken?
• 28:52
  And most people think of that stage show,
• 28:54
  that cruise ship experience they had.
• 28:56
  But in all reality, the way that I like to really educate around hypnosis
• 29:00
  is it's not mind control, it's not brainwashing.
• 29:03
  It's really just a another word to say a
• 29:06
  Deep state of meditation, meditation on steroids is how a lot of
• 29:09
  my clients describe it. It's a natural state of mind.
• 29:13
  I mean, you're awake, you're alert,
• 29:14
  you're conscious, you're in control every step of the way.
• 29:16
  It's the same state of mind you're in the moment you transition from sleeping
• 29:20
  to waking, you're caught up in a good book,
• 29:22
  your favorite TV show, or you find that flow state on a project or
• 29:26
  on the golf course. But the real value here,
• 29:29
  Jack, is that when we intentionally go into this hypnotic state,
• 29:32
  number one.
• 29:33
  We quiet that inner critic. And that's tremendously powerful,
• 29:38
  like we for the reasons we discussed earlier.
• 29:40
  But then, second is your subconscious influence is 95% of what you
• 29:45
  do every single day. It's home to your memories,
• 29:47
  your emotions, your beliefs, and your habits.
• 29:49
  So I use hypnosis to help the individuals I'm coaching.
• 29:53
  Uncover the origin of some of those sabotaging behaviors,
• 29:57
  those limiting beliefs, those irrational fears,
• 30:00
  so that we can not only uncover why they were learned in the first place,
• 30:03
  but then we can unlearn them. Take that energy to build a new belief,
• 30:07
  a new set of complementary behaviors that aligns with that next best version
• 30:12
  of themselves.
• 30:12
  Yeah, that makes sense. You know what th that that actually makes it maybe
• 30:16
  I just came to a realization here regarding what you're talking about because
• 30:20
  I think, you know, we we try to be honest with ourselves.
• 30:23
  We might be trying to do some of this work on our own,
• 30:26
  but in the end we there's a lot of external forces,
• 30:30
  including our self perception,
• 30:34
  that we're we're frankly it forces us us not to be.
• 30:38
  honest with ourselves to to the level I think you're you're diving into.
• 30:44
  Yeah, exactly. Because, you know,
• 30:45
  at the end of the day, our identity is so sacred that we want to protect it.
• 30:49
  So anything that begins to feel incongruent or a threat to our identity,
• 30:53
  which could be the actual truth in this case,
• 30:55
  we find several creative and sneaky ways to lie or t tell a different story.
• 31:01
  You know, th again I'm gonna sh g kinda go off the rails for a second here,
• 31:05
  but it kind of reminds me of this was a number of years ago that I
• 31:10
  I took a personality test and and my wife was sitting there next to me
• 31:13
  and I was answering the questions and she was calling me out on how
• 31:19
  I was answering some of those and I have to be honest,
• 31:21
  it was probably the most revealing personality tests I had ever taken.
• 31:27
  when you have somebody sitting there next to you and and kind of keeping
• 31:31
  you in check. 'Cause you d you stop answering it the way you think
• 31:35
  you should instead of the way you you are.
• 31:37
  Well, if you are ready, Paul, we'll dive into the rapid fire and close
• 31:40
  out this episode.
• 31:42
  Rock and roll.
• 31:44
  What lie do real estate investors often tell themselves?
• 31:47
  that they will slow down when they hit X number of deals or X number
• 31:51
  of dollars in their portfolio.
• 31:52
  If you could go back in time and give your younger self a piece of advice,
• 31:55
  what would it be?
• 31:57
  Slow down and have more fun.
• 31:59
  You help a lot of people unblock themselves and get out of their own way,
• 32:04
  but what keeps you currently up at night?
• 32:07
  Mm. So I co parent my eighteen month old son.
• 32:10
  He's my absolute joy, the love and priority in my life.
• 32:13
  And I miss him when I don't have him and I am concerned for everything that's going
• 32:18
  on for him, but so grateful that I get to play such a prominent role in his life.
• 32:22
  And then finally, what single tool or process have you implemented that
• 32:26
  has had the biggest time saving impact?
• 32:28
  Candidly, it's giving myself permission to work less and to work smarter.
• 32:32
  And that permission has led to shaving off hours and hours per week of time
• 32:37
  I used to previously waste f trying to feel busy or productive just for
• 32:41
  the sake of feeling busier productive because I thought that's how it had to be.
• 32:45
  And if you feel like you need a little help offloading some of that work,
• 32:48
  that's what I do at Real Deal Crew.
• 32:50
  So head over there for that information.
• 32:52
  Paul, one more time, why don't you give everybody your podcast and where they
• 32:56
  can reach you and then we'll close out the show.
• 32:59
  Yes, sounds great, Jack. The Unstuck High Performer podcast and at
• 33:03
  the Paul Salter on Instagram, YouTube,
• 33:05
  and TikTok.