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When Your Inner World Feels Loud: Learning to Listen Without Shame · The Whole Hearted Woman

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to the Wholehearted Woman Podcast, a Christ-centered space where faith meets emotional healing and the quiet work of heart restoration.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Kristen Ray, and I'm really grateful you're here today.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: Around here, we talk honestly about the places in life where our hearts have been shaped, sometimes by love, sometimes by pain, and how God gently restores us back into wholeness.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: This podcast is for the woman who loves God deeply but senses there is more, more healing, more freedom, more life available in him.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: And if you've ever started to notice what's happening inside of you but didn't quite know what to do with it, this episode is just for you.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Have you ever slowed down long enough to notice what's happening inside of you?
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: And instead of finding peace, you find noise.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: In the last episode, we talked about our inner world, what's happening beneath the surface, how our reactions, patterns, and beliefs were formed, and maybe as you listened you began to notice things you hadn't slowed down to see before.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: And here's what can happen next.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: When you finally slow down, it doesn't always feel peaceful.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it feels loud.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: Your thoughts are racing, emotions seem layered, reactions rise up quickly, and instead of finding clarity, you feel overwhelmed.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_00: And you might think, I shouldn't be feeling this way.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_00: Why is this still affecting me?
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: I thought I had already dealt with this.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: I remember the first time I actually stopped long enough to listen.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: It wasn't something that came natural to me.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: I was actually advised by a therapist to try meditation, and if I'm being honest, it felt completely foreign.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: No one around me meditated.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: I never saw anyone do that.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: So when I first sat still, my mind didn't feel peaceful at all.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: It felt loud.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: My thoughts were racing, one after the other, almost like I couldn't slow them down.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember thinking to myself, this isn't gonna work.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: I can't do this.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: This feels too uncomfortable.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_00: And that's actually the moment we want to stop because it feels like too much, like we're doing it wrong.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's not for us.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: But what I didn't realize at the time is that what I was experiencing wasn't failure.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: It was just the first layer.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: And the more I stayed with it, the more I allowed myself to sit there without running, something began to shift.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: The noise didn't disappear at all, but I started to move through it.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it was beyond the first layer of racing thoughts that things began to settle.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: And underneath the chatter, there were deeper thoughts, quieter ones, more honest ones.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where I began to realize there was something in me that had been waiting to be heard.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: And what I have come to understand since then is that many of us stop at the noise without realizing there's something deeper underneath it.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: But what if nothing is really wrong?
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: What if what you're noticing is something being revealed?
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_00: Because your inner world has been forming over time, and when you begin to pay attention, you're not creating something new.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: You're just uncovering what's already been there.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: You can't hide the inner world.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Many of us have learned how to push it down, that's for sure.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: We ignore it, we stay busy, we stay strong, but the truth is we can't really hide what's happening inside us.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's always going to find a way to show up in our reactions, our relationships, and our patterns.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: And this is so important.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: This is not something to feel ashamed of.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: This is something to begin listening to.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus sees, and throughout scripture, we see moments where Jesus knew what people were thinking, not to expose them, but to meet them in a moment of truth, to bring understanding, to bring healing.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: And in the same way, God sees what's happening inside of you.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: He's not looking with judgment, he looks with compassion.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I'd like to introduce something that may help your perspective on this, because there's places in our heart that we've learned to protect, and those places still have a voice.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_00: They speak in moments of stress, conflict, and uncertainty, telling you what it means, what to expect, and how to respond, even if it's not what we truly want.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why wounds have a voice.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: Some would call this your inner child.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: I often describe it as the younger places in our heart, places that were shaped in moments of pain or confusion, places that didn't feel safe or seen or understood.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's like parts of us at that early age or at that time in our life were just frozen at that time.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: And those parts of you are not trying to harm you, they're trying to protect you.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: And this is where we often get it wrong.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_00: We try to silence those reactions, we try to control them, to push them down, and we judge ourselves for having them.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: But real transformation doesn't come from being harsh with yourself.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: It comes from learning to listen without shame.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: So instead of saying, why am I always like this when you recognize a pattern coming back to you because of a reaction you have, and it comes back to you in a way we don't like, we just bring it gently into the light.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: And this is where true self-control begins.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: Not in force, but in awareness, compassion, and knowing we have a choice.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: You can feel something and not be ruled by it.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: You can notice a reaction and choose a different response.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_00: This is what it means to tend your heart.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: We don't ignore things, we don't shame ourselves, and we don't let it run everything.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: But we care for it, we listen and we bring it before God.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to take you one layer deeper.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: Because this isn't just about understanding your inner world, and it's not just about feeling more at peace.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: Scripture tells us that one day we will stand before God, not for condemnation, but for our lives to be revealed, not to shame us, but to show what truly formed in us.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: And what we see in scripture is this it's not just what we did, it's what our lives were built from.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: Were they built from fear?
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: Were they built from striving or from trying to hold everything together?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: Or were they formed from love, from truth, from surrender, from trust in Him?
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: Scripture describes it like this: that some things are like gold, silver, and precious stones, things that last.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: And other things are like wood, hay, and straw, things that don't remain.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: And this is why this matters so much, because we're not just trying to manage our reactions, we're not just trying to improve our behavior.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: We want to allow God to transform what our lives are being built from so we have the true foundation.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: And this is about formation, this is about what is being shaped in our hearts, because what's happening in your inner world right now is not small, it's not insignificant.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's forming the life you're living and the life that will one day be revealed.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: And the beautiful part is this God is not asking you to fix yourself, he's inviting you to surrender it so he can form something in you that lasts.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: And as you begin to listen, you may start to notice something even deeper underneath it all, a thread that runs through so many of your reactions, so many of our patterns, fear, often showing up as worry, overthinking, trying to hold everything together.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: So in the next episode, we're going to talk about that.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: I'd like to close now with a prayer.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: Father, you see every part of us, even the places we don't always understand.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: You see what rises up in us, the thoughts, the emotions, the reactions, you know our past.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: You are not afraid of any of it.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: Your word says in Psalm 139, search me, O God, and know my heart.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: Test me and know my anxious thoughts, and lead me in the way everlasting.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: Lord, I invite you into our inner world, the loud places, the tender places, the places that feel overwhelming or unclear.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: We don't want to just manage what we see, we want to surrender what's shaping us, and we surrender that to you, Lord.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: Form in us what lasts, shape our hearts in truth, lead us out of fear and into trust, teach us how to listen without shame and how to walk in your peace.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: In Jesus' name, amen.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I learned something today that the word shalom does not only mean peace, it's layered in the Hebrew, and it means wholeness.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I love that because that's what we're after.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_00: We're after wholeness, wholeness of heart, the whole-hearted woman, and that's what we're all about.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're listening right now and thinking, I'm realizing there's more happening inside of me than I know how to name, I created something just for you.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's called the Heart Healing Starter Guide, and it will help you to slow down, listen to your inner world, and identify what your heart is carrying and begin a gentle, God-centered process of healing.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: You can grab the guide and find all the details at HearttoHeartministry.com or just check the link in the show notes.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: And if you want to go deeper, not just understand this, but experience it, I'll be hosting a live workshop where I'll walk you through the five steps of the whole Heart of Woman method.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't a lecture, it's an encounter.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: I want it to be a space where you meet God in the places your heart meets him most.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: So if this episode spoke to you, would you share it with a friend or leave a review?
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: You're not alone in this journey.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to know that there is more healing available to you than you ever realized.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: Till we meet next time.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: Have a great week.