Latest / High Level Wife Podcast with Chelsey Holm / Taking the Bait is Costing Intimacy

Transcript

Taking the Bait is Costing Intimacy · High Level Wife Podcast with Chelsey Holm

• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to the High Level Wife podcast.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: This is Chelsea Home, and here we do Marriage God's way.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I wanted to talk about something that is tripping up a lot of wives and has tripped me up as well.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: And it requires that we step back and look at the big picture.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: There was an episode I recorded probably a year and a half ago, if not more.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I think it was called like pixelated something.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, but it it it's based on the premise that if you stand really close to the TV, like put your nose on the TV, all you see are like little dots, right?
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's not the case anymore, but that used to be the way with the old TVs, right?
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_00: And you couldn't actually see what was on the TV.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: It was just a bunch of fuzzy little dots.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: But if you step back and you go sit on the couch, now you can see the actual picture, right?
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_00: And that is so much of life, is that we are too close to everything to be able to actually see the bigger picture and to have the right godly perspective of who God is and what he is doing, and understanding that we can stand on the truth of what we know that is in his written word to be true, right?
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: That he is bringing to completion the good work that he started in us for those who love him and keep his commandments.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like we can stand on that truth.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: We can stand on the truth of Jesus' words that you don't know yet now what I'm doing, right?
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: And it can help us to have this perspective to step back and look at the big picture and actually see God's hand moving through the smallest details to the biggest parts of the picture, right?
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: And we have to, that's like the first thing that we have to be able to do in order to move past this stumbling block that I said many wives struggle with, and I have as well.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: And it's the stumbling block of taking the bait of Satan.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: There are so many traps that he lays for us simply because we will willingly take the bait, and then we wonder why things are the way that they are, right?
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's the things that we will take offense to, the things that will frustrate us, the things that will overwhelm us, the things that will turn our eyes from looking at God to our present circumstance up close without the right perspective.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: It turns our eyes from focusing on God and seeking Him first to now our eyes are on our problems rather than our eyes focused on the only one who has the plan to move us through the problems, around the problems, over the problems, or whatever, right?
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: Who has a plan for our growth and our maturing in faith when we walk through those challenging things?
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: When an offense presents itself itself, instead of taking the bait because our flesh wants what it wants, instead we step back, we have godly perspective, and we say, No, that person is not my enemy.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: I will not take this bait.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'll give you an example.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, on Sunday, yesterday, you know, we we observed Sabbath, and I am so thankful to God that he gave us a day to rest in him, and that he multiplies the work from the week to cover that.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just what a blessing it is.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: It's a gift for us.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: Man was not made for the Sabbath.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: Sabbath was made for man, is what Jesus said when the Pharisees called him out about picking the heads of grain through the field on the Sabbath, right?
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: And healing on the Sabbath and all of those things.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, um, I love to take naps, you know, on Sunday.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_00: I never do, but Sunday I love to take a short little nap, just a little power nap, you know, after lunch and after we're all chill and just, you know, relaxing together, being together, slowing down together.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: And uh yeah, so I was napping, but I wasn't sleeping yet.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe I had already slept and I was just waking up, but I overheard my kids and they were frustrated because they were playing in the woods behind our house here in Kentucky, and we we know the property lines.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: We were we walked the property lines um before we we bought the place.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: And uh so we have a small sliver of woods, it's like an obtuse triangle.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: No, I don't even know what it's acute triangle.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know, that's the equal sides.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's the one with the long, two long sides and a short side, whatever that is.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: I don't remember geometry, but anyway.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: Um so my kids were playing back there, and I guess uh a neighbor who has a property behind that uh came out and was yelling at them and threatening to call the cops if they didn't get off because they were they were building a fort out of bamboo that they found in the woods and I don't know.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: And uh, you know, and I could just it was too interesting because I, you know, my littles were just like all up in arms about it, like all offended, like how dare they, and blah, blah.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, and I heard my older son, my oldest son speaking some truth into them, like, hey, it's okay, like we're not gonna, we're not gonna make waves, we're just gonna, you know, walk away.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: And we'll talk to mom about it, you know, later after her nap when she gets up and whatever.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: And um, and and so we did.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I and I told them all, I said, listen, the enemy is going to be looking and setting traps all around us for us to be offended, to have division amongst people, amongst ourselves and other people.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: And we're just we're not gonna engage in that.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: We're not gonna take that bait.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna show love, we're gonna stand on truth, and we're going to build unity into the body of Christ.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, I don't know if this person is a believer or not, and you know, but we're gonna share God's love with this person.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: And if they are a believer, we're going to pursue unity with this person because they're in the body of Christ, right?
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and so, but it's these offenses.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: Marriage is the perfect ground zero for these offenses, right?
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: Your husband could look at you away and you can take offense, right?
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: Like, but you have to step back, you have to have godly perspective of who is this person, who's is this person, who am I, and whose am I and be able to move from that kind of thinking and perspective rather than as the kids bus going by, so it'll be back in a few minutes here, it goes around a loop, which is turning out to be a wonderful walking loop with lots of hills for me, and I'm loving it.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, uh tip my hat to Tommy on that one because he he eats and then goes and walks.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, some of those are prayer walks, some of those are you know, just just walks to get moving after eating, and you know, I wanting to be like my big brother Tommy in that, and uh no, really.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: I just I hate eating and just sitting, and I do a lot of sitting at my desk.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_00: So anyway, I gauged it engaged in a walk today and it was glorious on the loop that the kids' bus also takes.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: And um, but anyway, so understand that Satan sets traps in your marriage, and he wants you to take that bait so that you stop looking at God as your source and your authority, and instead you look to your husband as the enemy and the source of your pain and your hurts and all of the things.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: And when those take root, they breed into you bitterness and unforgiveness and resentment.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: And that is not a place you want to be.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: That is an abomination to the Lord, those who stir up strife and create divisions among the brothers, it's considered an abomination, one of the seven deadly sins.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_00: Do you understand me?
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: Are you hearing me, wife?
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, the fact that two become one flesh is a profound mystery that reflects Christ and his bride, the church.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so of course, your marriage is ground zero, where the enemy is gonna lay trap after trap after trap.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: But are you going to take the bait and grab onto the offense and take your eyes off of God?
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_00: Are you going to begin seeking validation through your offenses, through the ways you've been wronged?
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: Because people will listen and people will agree with you, and that's not a good place to be.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_00: Or are you going to lay those things all down at the foot of the cross, walking in his strength and his power and his and his might to heal and restore, to not let go to waste what the enemy meant to harm you.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: He is going to use for good and for the saving of many.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Are you going to do that, dear sister?
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if you will, watch God work.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'll see you on the next episode.