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I Would've Started a Schism · Serious Beef Podcast

0:01
I'm Abby and I'm Anna and this. Is serious beef.
0:03
Welcome, welcome. Here we are.
0:05
Here we are recording again. I'm not sure why I sound
0:09
surprised. It comes around once a week.
0:12
We do. Well.
0:13
We say it comes around once a week.
0:16
Listener, we have some news. I won't call it bad.
0:21
It's it's Beefy's problem. My beef.
0:25
Are you serious? And I.
0:27
I don't know, we said. We said the beef of serious beef
0:30
has a problem. We said you can guess who's the
0:33
beef we don't know and who's serious it's.
0:36
Me, I'm beef. Abby has the problem.
0:39
Well, I've been busy, OK, I've been busy.
0:45
I'm tired. I'm tired.
0:48
I need a break. We're I've been I'm pretty
0:52
slammed at work and Mae's just kind of busy.
0:55
I always think, always thinking in general.
0:57
Yeah, we know you're going to. You've told me about some
1:00
things, extra, extra work you're going to do and some nights that
1:03
you're going to be there late. We're a little, we're just a
1:05
little short handed right now and there's a lot going on.
1:08
So we're going to have to, I think, go to every other week
1:12
for a little. Bit you're thinking to get
1:15
through these very busy months ahead that you have.
1:19
We'll go to every other week and then we'll see how it goes and
1:22
maybe once the things settle down.
1:24
Yeah, once it you, once they settle down, I'm hoping we'll
1:27
get back to it. We'll.
1:28
Do what we can. Do you know?
1:29
Yep. Or we'll abandoned you forever.
1:31
Hopefully not, but well, Abby will will go with your schedule
1:35
and I'm here when you need me. Serious and beefy.
1:38
We'll always be getting together.
1:39
It's just a matter of whether or not we're going to be.
1:44
Editing and posting. Oh, that's awesome.
1:48
OK, so anyway, that's that's a little bit of housekeeping.
1:51
We got that out of the way. Don't be surprised if we go to
1:53
every other week. We're trying to make it work.
1:55
But you know, life is life. Yeah, it is what it is.
1:58
So what's the Speaking of beef? Do you have.
2:01
I have a beef. Do you have a beef?
2:03
This. Week Well, you know what I I
2:05
went to the ChatGPT at work with you.
2:08
Really. Yeah.
2:08
At work, we refer, we literally call ChatGPT Hazel.
2:12
Oh, because we're like, I need copy for the social post or
2:15
whatever and none of us have any ideas.
2:18
And so we're like, I need a social post and then we'll like.
2:21
Pull what we need. From there, yeah, I'll give us
2:23
some ideas and we'll we'll craft it around it.
2:25
But whenever we're talking about this, we don't, we don't always
2:28
want to go to our superiors and say, yeah, we, we consulted with
2:30
the AI chatbot and got the thing.
2:33
So we say we consulted with Hazel.
2:34
OK. Nice.
2:35
We consulted with Hazel. DVD is Hazel.
2:38
Hazel. I'm in the I'm in the.
2:39
You're in the know. So I, I had, I had we were
2:43
struggling for ideas earlier today.
2:45
I think we've, we were surprisingly right.
2:48
As much as we like to. This is why we're playing to
2:51
every other week, because. We ran out of things.
2:54
Beef. No, you were you were looking
2:55
for an idea. I haven't.
2:57
I have one, but it's a. You can use one of yours.
3:00
If you well, I there was a couple, there was a couple we
3:03
only need one that were they were pretty good.
3:05
Well, I was looking just for ideas, but did it did give me
3:08
some some beef of the day, which is what it was calling these
3:10
ideas and some of them cracked me up.
3:13
What do you got? So one of these, one of them
3:18
says beef with group text etiquette.
3:23
Oh, OK, OK. OK.
3:25
It says it says say lol and move on Susan.
3:30
What? It's like somebody just puts too
3:34
much. They put too much they.
3:35
Put the lol then they send a gift and they put the emoji.
3:38
OK, gotcha. The etiquette Oh you know, if I
3:41
send something, give me an lol because I've clearly sent you
3:44
something funny, but don't ignore my funny text.
3:47
People might just ignore. Saw it.
3:49
Liv gets mad at me. I know you saw it.
3:51
It says red, you didn't respond and then I'm in trouble, Yes.
3:56
That's why I don't put on. I don't turn on my read
3:58
receipts. I don't know how to turn that
3:59
off, but you. That would be wrong for you.
4:02
Oh OK, it'll pop up online. Oh, really?
4:04
Interesting. I think she's lying to you.
4:06
She's making you think She she can see because I can see when
4:09
she it's Yeah, she's got hers on.
4:11
She's a fool. She's a fool's right.
4:13
I don't let the people know you've read it because sometimes
4:15
I can read it, but I cannot respond.
4:18
And you know, if you have my work, I'm I think it might be
4:20
busy. It's true.
4:21
What else you. Got so well, I mean, do you want
4:23
other ones or do you want this good, I will figure out I'll.
4:25
Tell you Mom. I'll tell you, Mom.
4:27
Yeah, vote. I'm sad to say, uh oh.
4:31
I am not on vacation. Oh, on a tropical island, I.
4:35
Had to work today. That was my beep.
4:38
I was looking at my my screensaver and I have this
4:42
beautiful sunset on on this palm tree and the beach and yeah,
4:47
legit. And I was, I literally was like,
4:49
my beef is that I am not on vacation on that island.
4:54
I am at work instead. And it was terrible.
4:57
So. And it was terrible.
4:59
It's not terrible. I'm.
5:00
Joking my My work's been busy, but I can't it's.
5:02
Just the fact that I have to. Go to work.
5:03
Yeah, Nope. I'm with you.
5:05
I'm being a whiner. But yeah, I would rather, I'd
5:07
rather have been on the tropical island on vacation.
5:11
So vacation, vacation. So that was my beef.
5:14
I was. Worried a little bit.
5:16
I know I was making this out. I was like, I was really sad.
5:17
Well, because, because I've been worried about the general, about
5:21
the car insurance. General, my poor little General
5:23
Cornwallis gave his noggin A flog, and he.
5:26
Did he did. And I think he must.
5:28
He has a little SpongeBob pineapple house.
5:31
Yes. And I think he, we think he ran
5:33
into it. Oh, no, Very hard.
5:36
Because all of a sudden he had a blue bruise.
5:39
He had a big red bump on his little orange head and.
5:44
We it was goldfish. It was very scary.
5:46
It was big and noticeable. Yeah, it was, it was, it was big
5:48
enough, like it wasn't like huge, but it was big enough to
5:51
be noticeable. It was on a fish.
5:53
We all saw it right away. We're like, General, what
5:55
happened to you? Literally.
5:57
And Liv was afraid to clean out the fishbowl because she was
6:01
worried to move him. I was afraid we didn't because
6:05
we took, we put him into a, you know, we put fresh water in a
6:09
like a jar that we have. And then she just cleans.
6:11
We just have a little tiny fish bowl and then she puts fresh
6:13
washes everything and puts fresh distilled water in the bowl and
6:17
then puts him back. Sure.
6:18
And she was afraid to, we have a little net thing.
6:20
You know, she was afraid to move him because she didn't want to
6:23
like, 'cause him to have like a aneurysm or something, like a
6:26
brain bleed or something. It was like, is my man having an
6:29
aneurysm at real time? We were so worried.
6:32
But he has recovered. The big red bump is gone.
6:36
Well, I thought that that's what you feel.
6:38
I thought you were going to hit me with horrible.
6:39
Oh no, I'm so. Sorry, no.
6:42
I thought something had happened to General Gorm Wallace.
6:45
He's he's he's back to his old because he's self.
6:48
Again, because Colepot just up and died.
6:52
Nowhere. You never know.
6:53
You never know. Life is delicate when you're a
6:55
goldfish. I'll tell you what I think it is
6:57
for anybody but. But he recovered.
7:01
So he seems to be fine. The big red spot is gone, so I'm
7:05
very. Happy.
7:05
Well, that's well. That's his little noggin.
7:07
Looks much. Better well, because he was so
7:09
sad. He was moving slow and I was
7:11
like, I think he just crashed into his little house.
7:13
The man was was concussed. I think he was.
7:16
I really think he was. I was like, I literally said I
7:18
think he's got a brain. Bleed like what is going on?
7:20
What is happening? But it seems to have been
7:22
healed. So it does.
7:23
Well, thank God say that. Honestly, thank fish God.
7:27
Do you want to say the sauce? Sure, OK And you know in in
7:32
theme with cornwallis. OK general it's eel sauce, eel
7:38
sauce, eel sauce. I always get eel sauce whenever
7:40
we go get. Sushi, you said.
7:42
You said you always order that you really like it.
7:44
And it is. I read it, it said it.
7:46
You know it. It's a Japanese sauce.
7:47
So Yum. It is as I love Japanese food.
7:51
I have a story that does actually have something to do
7:54
with eels, which is why I chose eelsaws.
7:56
Well, if you'd like to hear it. I would.
7:59
OK, I read this headline and thought this is funny and I
8:04
thought of you. It's only because I wanted to
8:07
tell you, but because the the headline is basically London
8:11
records levels of cocaine so high that it's seeping into the
8:18
Thames River. OK, OK.
8:21
And this made you think of me. Well, it made me think I've got
8:25
to tell Abby this story. That's what it is.
8:27
OK, So I was like, don't take this the wrong way.
8:29
It literally said that record high levels of cocaine in the
8:34
Thames River is the last thing the eels need.
8:38
And I went the eels. OK, now I've got to find out
8:41
what's going. On Now I've got to read more.
8:43
So I had to go find out information.
8:44
So Londoners. Londoners are taking so much
8:47
cocaine, Londoners, the day that Yep, that it is seeping into the
8:54
city's famous River Thames. Oh my God, London, get your shit
8:58
together. The eel.
8:59
Lot of cocaine use. Think of the Eels.
9:02
Can you imagine? A team of scientists at the
9:04
University of King's College here studied the wastewater that
9:10
is entering the Thames by nearby sewers during storms and, you
9:15
know, things like that. And they're finding detectable
9:17
traces of cocaine. Oh, my Lord.
9:21
Yeah. And, and increases, they've
9:24
increases in caffeine and cocaine.
9:26
And there's a whole bunch of other big words that I can't
9:28
really say here. Right.
9:32
Compared to other major cities, it's like, apparently
9:36
outrageous, very high. And it's through.
9:38
It's likely that it's entering through users urine.
9:43
Which is stocking fear. Do not Maybe.
9:45
Affecting the Eels. That swim in the tank.
9:47
Do not swim in the river, the River Times No, do not, no, do
9:50
not do that. The London's water treatment
9:52
plants are tasked with purifying the water, but major storms
9:56
reportedly overwhelm the operations and allow some sewage
9:58
water to make its way into the river.
10:01
Well, OK, clearly. Yeah.
10:04
And so now they're they're worried that the eels, they're
10:09
making the eels high on the cocaine.
10:12
Well. Yeah.
10:14
Worry. They're very worried about the
10:16
eels. I would be, yeah.
10:17
So I'll tell you what I would be.
10:20
I mean, I'm not sure. Are the eels maybe having a
10:23
really good time? Is it?
10:24
It's. Cocaine is never the answer.
10:26
It's never the answer. Eels.
10:28
Eels. This goes out to all our
10:29
listeners who are eels. Cocaine.
10:32
Resist save. Yourselves for the eels sauce.
10:39
Is. Eel sauce made out of real eels,
10:41
not. Probably if it was, if it's
10:42
real, but I probably listen when we go get sushi.
10:46
We don't go to fancy places. OK, eel sauce.
10:50
I don't look it up. Save.
10:53
Yourself with the eels sauce the.
10:54
Big Man's World Soy sauce mirin, which is sweet rice wine, sake
10:59
and sugar. As though it's not made of eels.
11:01
Shoot. Could have been having some
11:03
cocaine. We couldn't don't import the.
11:06
Eels want they're all high. As a guy, you.
11:10
Ain't just Whistler. Dixie Wow, who's anyway?
11:13
So that was interesting. I was like, oh, the Eels in
11:16
London are all high as a guy. You ain't just Whistler Dixie.
11:19
Yeah. Apparently, and so are all of
11:21
the Londoners who are using it for.
11:24
Clearly London, get your shit together.
11:27
Yeah, a lot of cocaine use going on, apparently.
11:29
I think we should start a segment called Get Your Shit
11:32
Together. And every week we tell somebody
11:35
to well, as we're telling the news story or whatever it is,
11:38
whether you know, it's your skinny scoop poop or whatever.
11:40
And then we decide, you know, and maybe it's somebody we know,
11:43
you know what I mean? I'm not going to say well name
11:45
names, but or maybe it's somebody in a news store or
11:47
something like that. And at the end of that, we're
11:49
like get your shit together. Londoners here this week.
11:52
It's get your shit together. Get your shit together.
11:55
I have it's sort of a leftover. Oh, OK, post it.
12:01
Abby, who definitely has edited the podcast by the time we
12:07
recorded this and maybe maybe she she was supposed to come on
12:15
the mic and say what the name of that like bartending book was.
12:20
And I believe I did. I say post edit.
12:23
Abby said that, but I'm gonna say it again here for the
12:26
listeners. It's old Mr. Boston deed Lux
12:28
official bartender's guide. This book is a real gem.
12:32
I've brought it with here today because nothing could prepare
12:37
you. No, no, nothing can prepare you.
12:40
The the printing we believe was in 1949.
12:43
Yes. And it looks it.
12:45
This book is like 76 years old, but it's held up nicely.
12:48
It really has. And here he is.
12:49
It's nice leather bound cover. It's not falling apart.
12:52
A little picture of a jolly little fellow.
12:54
Oh, jolly little fellow, old Mr. Boston and Mr. Boston, if you
12:58
will. Well, let me read to you the
13:01
little message. For it and go for it.
13:03
Sirs, because why would a woman ever have this book?
13:06
Because the women aren't going to be.
13:08
I'll show you these drinks, apparently.
13:09
I'll show you Mr. Boston, sirs. May we now present to you old
13:14
Mr. Boston in permanent form. We know you're going to like
13:17
him. He is a jolly fellow, one of
13:20
those rare individuals, everlastingly young.
13:24
Is he? A distinct personality and
13:29
famous throughout the land for his sterling qualities and
13:32
genuine good fellowship. His friends number in the
13:36
millions, those who are great and those who are near great.
13:40
Even as you and I Wow, family, we're just, we're only great,
13:45
OK? He's joyful and ever ready to
13:47
accept the difficult role of quote life of the party.
13:51
A sympathetic friend who may be relied upon in any emergency.
13:57
Follow his advice and there will be many pleasant times in store
14:00
for you gentlemen. Old Mr. Boston, gentlemen, I
14:05
gave you old Mr. Boston. Dan the voice, good.
14:09
Dan the voice. Good.
14:11
We've discovered this book is a old Mr. Boston is apparently a
14:14
brand. It is of alcohol.
14:16
This yes, there's these awesome old timey advertisements in this
14:22
book. If you looked at the The Social
14:24
post from last week, you'll have seen these because we posted it
14:27
last week, Yes. I know.
14:30
So there's like, you know, what kind of what kind of booze does
14:33
Old Mr. Boston? A whole bunch, all kind.
14:35
This is bourbon. Bourbon.
14:37
This is whiskey. This is more whiskey.
14:41
I mean, I know. Dry gin, Gin.
14:45
And that sounds like some rum. More whiskey.
14:47
Oh, whiskey. Rocking chair.
14:49
Rocking Chair whiskey. Orange flavored gin, Slow gin,
14:53
SOLOE Apricot nectar, a beverage liqueur, Mint flavored gin,
15:00
Brandy, Imported rum. Here's some rum bourbon.
15:08
Some of these we're trying to radio.
15:09
On rock and. Rye.
15:10
Oh OK, a rye is a whiskey, isn't it?
15:13
I don't have a clue. Who knows?
15:15
And there's a whole bunch of look at all, look at all these
15:17
fancy bottles. They got all kinds.
15:18
So this, this is all the way to Boston.
15:20
That was a that. Was a big brand of of alcohol.
15:23
Fuck yeah there. This is the 8th printing of this
15:25
book. We decided there's about what?
15:27
How many? How many 600?
15:30
There's this possibly this book is like a.
15:32
It's tiny but it's like 100 and 56157 pages and there is
15:38
approximately 6 6:00 or so recipes. 5:00 to 6:00.
15:46
I'm going to underestimate page. Yeah, it's only a little less
15:49
because the ads are in there. Right, right, right.
15:51
So you do the math. Listen, just kidding.
15:54
I'll do the math. It's about 750 recipes that
15:59
cannot be right that. Seems like a lot of recipes.
16:01
I think it's 650. We should start at the beginning
16:04
and try each one. Although some of these are all
16:05
for raw egg and we just all raw egg white.
16:07
We said we might skip. I know that you know Lister,
16:11
maybe you know more about alcohol that I that I do.
16:14
Oh no. 157 * 7, yeah, 70 * 7 hours rather Fuck the first
16:19
time. OK, so like you said, there are
16:22
some without, but it is better probably around 750 or so
16:27
cocktails at a minimum, maybe even close to 800.
16:31
Yeah, there's a lot. And then there's the whole the
16:33
glasses guide what glass to use for each drink is hilarious
16:38
because you would have had I remember my mom having these
16:40
different shaped glasses and the Tom and.
16:42
Jerry, Bull and Muck. Oh, they had.
16:44
The what the hell is that? I have no idea, but they she had
16:46
the fancy punch bowl and yeah, you use the different type of
16:49
glass depending on what kind of drink her, her stemware for her
16:54
with her China. You had the champagne glass, you
16:57
had the wine glass, you had that, you know, you had all the
16:59
different glasses. It was crazy.
17:01
Here's the bitter bottle. Yeah, bottle look at.
17:05
That fan and you wouldn't you wouldn't dare serve a drink in a
17:07
different type class. But this is my fave.
17:09
You said there's. Some when to serve there is also
17:14
some I have to assume a woman. There's no idea this is a man's
17:17
handwriting so. Even though this was addressed
17:19
to sirs. Yep, stick it to the man.
17:21
Lady. Whoever.
17:22
Whoever. Stick it to old Mr. Boston.
17:24
Our drink lady is here that wrote the recipe.
17:26
Right. The recipe, which is 1 tea
17:28
sugar, one ounce lemon, 2 oz gin, rum or W3 ounces of this is
17:34
in cursive. And so we're trying to figure
17:36
out it looks like it says bone mixture.
17:38
What? Oh, is that what you think that
17:41
says? That's AB that says mixture.
17:45
Are you sure that's an X or is it an S?
17:47
What is it Miss Tune? I mean, what else would it be if
17:50
it that's an S? Miss Tune, OK.
17:53
But then there's an I in there. But that then does that that
17:55
make that an NI think it's just bad handwriting?
17:57
I think it's mixture BOVE is what it looks like, right?
18:04
Or is it love mixture? That's what I said.
18:07
It's a love potion. Well, how the fuck am I supposed
18:10
to repeat that, Caroline? It's I don't know.
18:12
Caroline, where am I supposed to get 3 ounces of love potion?
18:16
Right in a. 12 ounce glass, OK. Show me the thing and maybe it's
18:20
like nistine. Maybe.
18:24
Or Mystique. It's a love potion, I'm telling
18:26
you. There's a song.
18:29
Called, she stole this. Book and wrote it in there.
18:31
So her husband or someone that she had her eyeball on, she
18:35
wrote the recipe in there and then he had made he he
18:37
unwittingly because mixed himself up a love potion and
18:42
fell in love with her clearly. One ounce lemon, 2 ounce gin,
18:49
rum or whiskey, that was. I was the mad ramblings of a
18:53
crazy. Woman and you would.
18:53
Say clearly, clearly, I'm going with yeah.
18:58
We're going to have to post a picture of this and maybe
19:00
listeners, you can look at this hand ring and tell us what that
19:02
ingredient is. We got 3 ounces of something,
19:05
but we don't know what it is. You would be able to decipher
19:08
that grandma. OK, there we.
19:11
Go. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
19:12
We'll get back together. Oh yeah, you got to read.
19:13
This I got to read this. In the back this is hilarious
19:15
because it says. Like appetizer like this is when
19:17
you serve beverages. Appetizer Beverages.
19:19
Cocktails, dry Sherry or Madeira, that's what.
19:22
You serve with the appetizer. Soup, Sherry or dry Madeira.
19:27
OK, if you're eating roast champagne.
19:31
Really. That's what it says.
19:32
No red wine but the Rose beef. You get red wine, not what the
19:34
fuck it says Mr. Boston wants you to say.
19:37
That is not what old Mr. Boston would do.
19:39
Which they said ever youthful. It literally says old Mr. Boston
19:44
Mr. Boston, what about fish? What would I serve with my fish?
19:48
Rind wine, Moselle or white Burgundy?
19:50
The answers. Are all here.
19:51
They're all here. Don't go off page.
19:53
Don't go off script. OK, care should be taken never
19:57
to follow a sweet wine by a dry wine or heavy wine by a light
20:01
wine. Are you fucking keep it heavy or
20:04
keep it alive? Are you out of your keep it dry
20:06
or keep it sweet? You can follow a dry wine with a
20:09
sweet, but never a sweet but the dry.
20:11
Interesting. Which makes sense.
20:13
What do you serve with your cheese?
20:14
Course? Pork.
20:16
Pork. Pork, Pork.
20:19
What about fruit then? White Port Malaga or Toque, OK.
20:24
Whatever those are OK, but. Champagne is the only wine that
20:28
may be served with any course and at all times during the
20:31
meal, all Mr. Boston says. Mimosa's all around.
20:34
Mimosa's all around for every course.
20:36
Yeah, always acceptable. OK, good to know.
20:40
These are interesting. I mean it gives you a little a
20:43
recipe for a simple syrup. Because a lot of things called
20:46
for a simple. Syrup.
20:46
It does, and it also says because of the fact that sugar
20:48
is not easily dissolved in alcohol, it is best, especially
20:51
in drinks that are to be stirred rather than shaken, to dissolve
20:54
sugar before adding the liquor. Good to fucking know.
20:57
Good to know. Now listen, Gladys, who maybe
21:01
wrote this, I don't know what she wrote.
21:03
I don't know. Listen, Gladys, when I get my
21:05
hands on you. Who was an adult probably when
21:09
she wrote this. In 1949, maybe.
21:12
Maybe you think they had ballpoint pens in 1949?
21:17
Ballpoint pens released to the public.
21:24
Let's see, Ballpoint pen 1945. She would have had a ballpoint
21:29
pen. Maybe.
21:31
But listen, listener, the most important bit is that when you
21:35
open the cover, there's a beautiful picture.
21:38
With these cute little glasses. Cute graphic with all the
21:40
different styles. On a on a ribbon written at the
21:43
bottom, it says she. Can't read it.
21:47
Wherein are solved the mysteries of mixed trings?
21:50
You know what? Nah.
21:50
Ah, because we can't read her damn handwriting.
21:53
Well, they did print that one. It's.
21:54
Created more of a mystery. Print that one.
21:57
Now I will say this is giving What's that?
22:00
Which show? Not Sabrina.
22:03
Come on. Come on.
22:04
Samantha, come on. Bewitched be is.
22:07
It's giving bewitched. It's giving Bewitched if you
22:10
were an alcoholic. It's true.
22:11
Mm hmm, yes, that's exactly what it's giving.
22:14
They were always mixing up something well.
22:18
Clearly Potions. They were witches.
22:21
Anna, are you judging? No, not at all.
22:25
So so you know listener, if you can get your hands on a 1949 old
22:30
Mr. Boston D Lux Official Bartenders guide, right?
22:35
Well worth it. I probably spent a dollar on
22:38
this book cuz we got it at the book sale and price from back in
22:43
1949. Two dollars $2.00 in 1949.
22:45
That's expensive. A Bove mixture is most likely
22:50
referring to a wine product, specifically Charles Bove Brute.
22:54
The sparkling wine from the lorry region of France did I
22:58
just figured out. So is it like sparkling?
23:00
Wine. Bove Mixture.
23:01
Oh my fucking God. OK.
23:02
Sorry, $2.00 in 1949 is worth 2687 today, Yeah.
23:05
Yeah, that would have. Been Can you imagine paying 2?
23:07
Dollars for a book would have been expensive in 19. 40 Can you
23:09
imagine paying with tax? Probably $28.00.
23:12
Yeah, but well, that's what it would cost today.
23:14
Look at because it's a nice hard bound, like I said, feels like a
23:17
leather cover. It probably is.
23:19
Oh man, the skins of the bovine mixture put together for this
23:24
ear book. Tell you what, I still don't
23:27
even know if that's the right. I think you've got it though,
23:30
because, because what did we say?
23:33
1 tea sugar, one ounce lemon, 2 ounces of gin, rum or whiskey,
23:38
and then 3 ounces of basically a sparkling wine.
23:41
Both. Mixture, right?
23:43
I think that's what that says. I think that's what it says in a
23:45
12 oz. Glass, we're gonna have to try
23:47
it right below. No, don't you dare write in that
23:50
book. What's wrong with you?
23:51
Write it on your notebook, lady. Did.
23:52
Don't. That's her right.
23:53
That's preserved. Gladys would be very upset with
23:55
you. You.
23:56
Had to translate what's? Wrong with you.
23:58
You had to translate. We're not even sure if that's
24:02
really it. That's silly, yes.
24:03
Well, we could mix it. We'll mix it up for you, Gladys.
24:06
We'll pour one out for black pour.
24:07
One out for Gladys. We're going to have to try it
24:10
good and lower. This is a crazy.
24:11
Absolutely honestly, And this is what a what a freaking what a
24:16
freaking oh, look at this one. It's got grapefruit juice in it.
24:18
7th Heaven cocktail for you, Anna.
24:20
Oh my gosh, I'm ready. OK, I'm gonna show the Shamrock
24:23
cocktail it's got. We can have a party and make
24:26
some drinks. Absolutely talked about this as
24:28
everyone if you can find something online.
24:32
You can find this. Book online, go online and pick
24:35
out a recipe and we'll see what we can do We'll.
24:37
See what we can do? Send it in.
24:38
It's a gem. The book Somebody will.
24:40
Eventually comment on one of our.
24:42
Podcast posts someday. Someday, Lister.
24:45
Kate did Once Upon a time told me about her greeting card beef.
24:48
That was great. I loved it.
24:49
We haven't had a listener beef in a while.
24:51
It's true. Write in your beef.
24:53
Tell us your beef. Tell us your beef.
24:55
We will listen. Now.
24:58
I've got. Oh, what do you got?
24:59
Oh, well, no, no, no. We were going to move on, so I
25:01
was going to. You got a story.
25:03
I have something. I have been holding on to some
25:05
stories. I'm sitting with them because I
25:06
want to tell you. OK, well, I want to tell you in
25:08
the pod. We'll inter, we'll intersperse
25:10
these. We'll go back.
25:10
You start first the story. We'll start with first the
25:13
story. And then I've got ChatGPT had
25:16
recommended Petty Would you rather's.
25:18
Oh, yeah, Yeah. And they were pretty funny.
25:20
So I will I will let you you you give me a story.
25:23
I'll give you would you rather. Do that.
25:25
Here we go. Kenosha.
25:27
The city of Kenosha. OK Is Kenosha in Wisconsin?
25:30
It sounds like a Wisconsin city. A.
25:33
Midwest thing to say. Sounds very Oshkosh.
25:37
I thought, do you spell? Kenosha KENOSH.
25:41
A It was way off. It was city in.
25:43
Wisconsin. OK, I'm like, that's got to be
25:45
a. Wisconsin a lighthouse.
25:46
Look at that. OK, the city of Wisconsin put
25:49
out on their social media OK page.
25:56
OK, do you have a hole that needs to be filled?
26:02
Kenosha? The city of Kenosha takes public
26:05
safety very seriously, which is why we're excited to launch our
26:08
new Show Us Your Whole public safety initiative, Hashtag Show
26:14
Us Your. Whole let me tell you something
26:17
some intern, some 16 year old intern convinced the city to do.
26:24
Show us your whole. Public safety initiative To
26:27
participate, simply send us a. Picture of your whole along with
26:35
its location and tagline. Come fill my hole and we will
26:42
dispatch our cruise to service your hole in a prompt, a
26:45
professional manner. Your satisfaction is our
26:48
priority. The city of Kenosha.
26:51
There he is. Well, how'd it go?
26:57
I don't want to know what kinds of pictures they got because you
27:00
know, you know, it was bad, you know, you know.
27:04
It was very bad. It was going to be bad.
27:09
So I don't. Want to know I.
27:11
Don't want to see the pictures. I would like to I would like to
27:14
you know, kind of hear about a smattering of them, but no,
27:16
there were no comments. Was it show your whole?
27:18
Somebody did like a screenshot of?
27:19
The well, that's why I'm Googling.
27:21
Hashtag Show us your. Whole Oh Snopes have a show us
27:24
your whole initiative satire. They don't think it was real.
27:28
Okay, okay, because I, I just saw it on Facebook, somebody had
27:32
taken a screenshot and showed it and it was pretty funny.
27:35
It was pretty funny. Like you said, it was some
27:37
intern who? Put it up on the.
27:39
Face there is evidence they believe that it could be fake,
27:42
but either way, either. Someone.
27:45
Yeah, there it. Is either someone hacked their
27:48
account and put it on That's true or like you said, or
27:51
somebody from this like a like a or maybe a disgruntled ex
27:54
employee. That's so Can you imagine?
27:57
I read that I was crying. I was like, OK, I have to read
27:59
the stabby. Oh, that's pretty good.
28:01
All right, that's that is pretty good.
28:04
No, hold on, this is the city of fucking Kenosha, right?
28:09
How many bottles of y'all received?
28:12
Today I'm telling you it's. On their website.
28:14
It was on their Facebook. Page come fill my hole.
28:17
We have a similar program in one local city here in our county.
28:20
They really appreciate it when they got all of their holes
28:23
filled. Thumbs up.
28:26
May all their holes be smooth soon.
28:32
Is this the Kenosha version of Tinder?
28:37
OK, it's a moment like this that the immense pride in my hometown
28:42
shot. He's giving the applause.
28:43
Yes, a gift. I can buy.
28:46
Dinner first you can buy dinner first I used to someone's fault
28:51
our. Job today's monitor in these
28:52
confidence, huh? We think Ludacris said it best.
28:57
I've got holes. I've got holes in different area
29:00
codes. What?
29:03
OK dude, at least use Lube. Oh my God, you're done.
29:07
Oh man. So I guess what is the city
29:09
response? Look, the city of Kenosha
29:11
replied. What did they reply?
29:14
Absolutely. We need to protect our equipment
29:16
from excessive. Wear.
29:23
I assume someone's full time job.
29:25
This is Monet's Cummins. We made the intern to do it.
29:27
Bill's character, but that's fantastic.
29:29
Are you going to buy me dinner first?
29:32
Depends on what your hole looks. Like OK, this is pretty.
29:40
Good. Is this the Kenosha version of
29:41
Tinder? We call it filler.
29:43
Filler. Excellent.
29:46
OK, there it is. How many buttholes we all
29:47
received? You know what I'm?
29:56
Telling you what? OK, shit actually happened, I'm
29:58
telling you. You know what, I thought that it
30:01
was fake but here it is on here, it's on Facebook and the safe
30:04
Kenosha is replying is replying to these people.
30:06
It's hilarious. Just wondering if you also fill
30:10
holes in different area codes. My dirt Rd. needs some work.
30:13
Winky face. Oh my God.
30:14
And the. City of Kenosha said.
30:16
Send us a pic and we'll. Get.
30:17
Back to you, somebody's going through and laughing.
30:22
Their ass off at every. Single comment.
30:24
Holy shit. Holes are certainly easier to
30:27
fill when they're wet. When they're wet, you.
30:30
Oh man, did you see that person? Oh my God.
30:33
Like apps. Oh, this is the I.
30:37
Can fix that? I can fix that.
30:38
That's. Hilarious.
30:41
Oh man. Oh, I have a hole that's extra
30:44
wide and actually do you do you have the material volume to fill
30:47
the hole? What's this one?
30:49
We have holes. Holes City of Lakeland, we crave
30:54
having our holes filled. We crave having our roles
30:57
filled. Wonder what the turnover rate is
30:59
for the position? Monitoring those picture
31:01
submissions takes a special skill set, And the city of
31:04
Kenosha says we make, oh, we make the interns.
31:05
Do it OK. Does one get to choose who comes
31:08
out to fill my hole? I don't want it done half assed.
31:10
Just say City of Kenosha. We assure you that everyone in
31:14
our crew is highly experienced and has top of the line
31:16
equipment. You will not be left
31:18
unsatisfied. Oh my God, man.
31:25
OK, so yeah, if you want, we could, if you ever want any
31:27
little, a little light reading, go to the City of Kenosha's
31:30
Facebook page and and find out. You can read more of these
31:34
comments on Fill My Holes because.
31:37
They're people are asking if they are offering, if they have
31:41
any open hole filler positions and they said we're always
31:44
looking for volunteers. Oh my gosh, Nope.
31:46
I want to get paid. If I'm filling holes, I need to
31:49
get paid. This person says my hole was
31:51
filled and I didn't even have to ask.
31:52
You guys are on top. Oh my God.
31:58
Oh my God. Oh asking if they have a
32:02
position to their social media and they said no.
32:04
But requests for applications to work on our Rd. crews are up
32:07
800%. Kenosha.
32:13
That got me. Way to go, Kenosha.
32:16
Kenosha. You do not need to get your shit
32:17
together. That was amazing.
32:19
That was amazing. That was better than I thought
32:20
it was going to be. That was way better.
32:21
I just happened to see the post like somebody else had
32:25
screenshot and post it. And I thought it was hilarious
32:27
thinking it was a joke. Yeah.
32:28
And Ice. Well, yes, snopes.com said it
32:31
was a joke. However, I was there.
32:33
Yeah, we were on their website. I was there on their Facebook
32:35
page. That is hilarious.
32:37
So either say was a joke and they just ran with it and just,
32:41
you know, made the best out of a crazy situation.
32:45
Who knows, but that was a hoot. That was a hoot and 1/2.
32:48
Oh my God. That was fun.
32:49
OK, All right. Tell me about your petty.
32:53
Would you rather? Well I was reading them through
32:55
and these are petty. Usually the would you rather's
32:57
are something drastic. Right, so this is not drastic.
33:00
Would you rather never find a matching Tupperware lid again,
33:05
or never get a parking spot near the?
33:08
Entrance I'll have to go with the Tupperware lid because I can
33:12
use press and. Seal.
33:14
I'd rather find the parking spot.
33:16
That's true. I don't know if.
33:18
It's not guaranteeing you a spot near the entrance, just it's
33:21
just saying you definitely won't ever find one.
33:24
Well, that's OK, I gotta go with the parking spot.
33:27
Gotta. Go with the parking spot.
33:28
Oh, I mean I'm gonna. I would rather choose to not
33:31
find my lids. I'm confused.
33:32
Can you restate restate the question?
33:36
I won't I'm. Confused.
33:39
Never find a Tupperware lid? Yes or or never get a parking.
33:44
Spot near the amateur. I got to go.
33:45
I'm going to. I'm going to go with never find
33:47
my Tupperware. She'd rather have a potential
33:48
closer bar. Exactly.
33:49
I will use press and seal. It's all good.
33:51
Or get rid of Tupperware. Go get some Rubbermaid, it's
33:53
fine. Oh, that's fair.
33:55
OK, go ahead. You know I don't know name brand
33:57
Tupperware for sure. Would you rather I'm going to
34:00
throw another one at you, sit next to a loud chewer or a
34:05
chronic foot Tapper? Oh, those are both tough and
34:09
petty. I think the Tapper for me
34:15
because if they're chewing, it's gross sounding.
34:18
Yeah, Yeah, I have to listen to one or the other.
34:20
Yeah, you're going to. I think I'd rather.
34:22
Listen to the tits. Tits.
34:23
I'm going to go with the tip tits too.
34:25
I think I could out tap them because I'll just put my earbuds
34:28
in and listen to some music and round it out.
34:29
But I think, but I don't want to hear the chewing.
34:31
I don't. It's true.
34:32
Can't do it. Sure, yeah.
34:33
I could I think I could get over the the tip tabbing.
34:35
I just would. You would just have to deal but
34:37
the chewing it would be very hard to deal with.
34:40
One of these ones, it said. Would you rather always have
34:44
socks that slip down? Oh, that's annoying.
34:46
Or A tag that itches no matter what your slots, your slots,
34:53
your socks will slip down or your tag will itch.
34:56
Oh my gosh. I know.
34:58
I gotta go with the socks because the tag itching is I
35:01
agree. I can't.
35:01
I agree. I will immediately just have to
35:03
just RIP the shirt off. I could just I could just not
35:06
wear socks, but if you cut the tag off because it always
35:08
itches, that little nub is gonna probably itch you too.
35:10
It's. True.
35:10
It's true. But if I'm not wearing socks,
35:14
how can they slip? Down they can't slip down.
35:16
It's true because you read me one that was Would you rather?
35:21
This one's weird because they. Don't match up.
35:22
It will because it. Wasn't a.
35:24
Would you rather I do? Want to talk about this one?
35:25
OK, what is it? It was like it wanted you to,
35:30
like, compare two things. Oh, OK.
35:35
And it still feels like a Would you rather?
35:37
Right. Well, I'm sure exactly.
35:39
It's like a this or that. Like would you and they, they
35:41
did say it is kind of a would you rather?
35:43
So they were giving examples like baby carrots versus full
35:45
size carrots or leftovers versus freshly made.
35:48
And then the third option, which those are all easy baby carrots
35:51
and they make sense. They go together fresh made.
35:53
Yeah, right. But then they wait a minute
35:55
baby. Hang on then.
35:58
What do you mean then he carries them a full size.
36:00
Bugs Bunny only eats full size. Carrots, but they're already the
36:03
baby carrots are like peeled and washed and ready to eat and you
36:05
don't have to worry about they're, they're ready to go.
36:09
Well, I'm not disagreeing. Right, so I'm going to go baby.
36:11
Carrots, but they're infants. Infants.
36:16
Not, not, not, not, not. I thought you were going to say
36:19
infinitely infants. And I'm like no, because they
36:21
get eaten so. They are infinitely infants.
36:25
That anyway, the point is OK, the third option.
36:28
The third option is weird socks or umbrellas.
36:30
Socks or umbrellas. You can have one or the other.
36:33
One is this. Combination.
36:35
This is a weird combo. I don't get it.
36:37
They don't go together. You can only have socks or you
36:40
can only have an well I like this.
36:41
It says this or that, but petty. That's the name of this.
36:44
I guess that's what it is. Kind of like would you rather
36:46
but sneaky? It's sneakier because it's.
36:50
Sneakier because it's a dumb ass combination as well.
36:52
It says pit two things against each other that shouldn't be
36:55
compared. OK, baby carrots versus full
36:57
size carrots and then like I get I get what you're going with
36:59
that compare and that comparison makes sense.
37:01
Dopers are freshly made. I get what you're.
37:03
Going again makes sense. Socks or umbrellas?
37:05
Does not make sense, so. Well, what you said, Anna.
37:07
It's got to be Umbrella. No, I can.
37:10
I will have to live without socks because I cannot live
37:12
without an umbrella. My socks are always falling
37:14
down, yeah. Exactly, I've already.
37:16
Chosen. I've already chosen to live
37:17
without socks, however, if it's between socks and umbrellas.
37:21
You don't use an umbrella. It's true.
37:23
I use an umbrella. Poncho.
37:25
I don't want to have to drag a poncho on and off, that's going
37:27
to mess up my hair. You just hold it.
37:29
Like a top of blood. And I also cannot go out in the
37:31
rain because my hair is terrible.
37:33
If it gets wet, that's it, it's over for me.
37:35
Well, have I? Have you considered they said
37:39
umbrellas now do they mean personal?
37:42
Because I can imagine you getting out the car patio
37:45
umbrella I. Could just fly away on a way to
37:51
the game. I'm going to Mary Poppins.
37:53
That shit, it's going to carry me off.
37:56
It's true. Well, you know what?
37:58
You could have a parasol. No, because it's not going to
38:02
keep the rain off me very well. What do you mean is it?
38:04
Umbrella. I think it's more cloth like
38:05
it's going to come through, right?
38:06
Well, fucking walk, I guess. That's the worst, man.
38:08
Walk fast. You know what?
38:10
It's funny that you asked this question because RIP my favorite
38:12
umbrella. It died yesterday.
38:14
It broke. I should have had that as my
38:16
beef because it was the one we got when I was in Minnesota.
38:19
I got when I was in Minnesota. That says fuck off.
38:21
Rain all over the umbrella. It's my favorite umbrella.
38:25
The one metal piece opened it and it was broken and I was like
38:29
no, not my favorite umbrella. Remind me I'm putting the in
38:34
memoriam. In memoriam my fuck off
38:36
umbrella. Fuck off rain.
38:37
Fuck off rain. Fuck off, Umbrella.
38:39
I kept it in my work bag every day, carried it in and out of
38:43
the bank with me in that way if I ever got if it rained while I
38:46
was in there I would always have an umbrella with me.
38:49
Little travel size umbrella. Perfect.
38:52
Lost it yesterday. Oh my God.
38:54
Yeah, devastated. I love that umbrella.
38:56
Oh my God so fuck off. Rain umbrella, umbrella.
39:01
And apparently, our socks. No.
39:04
They ain't dead. They ain't dead yet.
39:08
So I think you have that frying face.
39:10
Yeah, so sad. Oh my God, a travesty.
39:14
Alrighty, what else you got? What else you got?
39:16
It's your. Turn ready for another one.
39:17
I'm ready. OK.
39:18
The Kenosha one. Good stuff.
39:20
That was a funny one. The heavy hitter here.
39:22
OK, I have to find this one. There is this crazy story.
39:27
It happened in Spain was. It the rain.
39:31
It fell mainly on the plane. Yes, this man stuns the
39:37
churchgoers with a gun. Stun gun.
39:40
No, he comes running into the church with a child on his
39:45
shoulder, sitting on his shoulders.
39:46
You. Know what I mean?
39:47
OK. So not piggyback, I think I've
39:49
seen the he came running into the church.
39:52
OK, sprinting down the aisle. OK, pushing people out of his
39:57
way. They tried to stop him because
39:59
they didn't know what he was doing.
40:01
OK, he's wearing shorts and AT shirt and no shoes.
40:05
Well, so he makes it to the. So he chose Umbrella.
40:09
He chose umbrella. He makes it to the altar, places
40:13
the child on the altar at the feet of the statue of Mary.
40:18
I think I've seen this. Video and leaves goes to leave
40:23
and the people are very confused and I have the video if you want
40:25
to see it. I've seen the video actually.
40:27
Well, I wanted to tell you this. OK, so the church is packed
40:31
because it's like before of feast day.
40:33
You get some background, you get some more on this and.
40:35
And he, yeah, he climbs up there.
40:37
He climbs up on. I mean, look at what?
40:38
He climbs all the way up there. To get the child at the feet of
40:42
the Madonna statue there. Yeah.
40:45
Then he gets down and he's like, OK, my work here is done.
40:47
And he goes to leave and the people in the crowd, the church,
40:52
are like, what in the hell is happening here, you know?
40:56
And so they go after him and like, look, is this your kid?
41:01
Is this your child? And he's like, yes, it's his
41:03
son, I guess. Yeah.
41:04
And they're like, you need to take him with you.
41:08
You can't just leave him here at this church.
41:12
And so I guess he finally, he did go back and get the kid and
41:16
took his son out with him. And so they were like, OK, what
41:21
is this all about? Why would someone do this?
41:23
OK. And so apparently for there's a
41:26
tradition in Spain for the more fanatical worshippers to, to
41:31
place the children and babies at the feet of the the virgin to
41:34
touch the statue, you know, that close proximity will bring them,
41:38
protect them in their life and basically, you know, take care
41:42
of them and, and whatnot. And so a person commented that
41:46
is a desperate man trying to cure his devil child.
41:55
Have a child. Have a child.
41:57
Whoever this person is, they asked.
41:59
Their comment was he was. Trying to cure his death.
42:03
That's pretty fucking good. I have.
42:06
I have. OK, so no one ever found out
42:08
what the man was searching for, what he what he was hoping to
42:10
to, you know, accomplish. He did take his child and leave
42:14
but. So I can tell you because I've
42:17
seen this video, OK, I've seen this video, OK, good.
42:20
And the I had seen a similar thing that I was talking about.
42:26
They said either brings a good fortune or they think it'll
42:28
protect less or help them or whatever.
42:32
And and you're not supposed to put your kids up there.
42:34
No, no, you're not. I mean, you're.
42:35
Literally here to climb up on there.
42:37
Put them in the in. The same.
42:38
So that's that's why, that's why there's like apparently it's
42:41
like not a one off thing. This happens like the people are
42:44
not as surprised. That's why there's people up
42:47
there that are like trying to actually stop.
42:48
If they're all, they're prepared, they're ready.
42:50
For it cuz it even says there's a tradition in Spain, but the
42:54
more fanatical believers. So I guess you know, the people
42:59
who people from out of town may have been surprised, but I guess
43:02
the people who live there, they. See this, this might happen.
43:04
Well, they and it's, it's not, it's frowned upon.
43:06
You're not real. You're really not supposed to do
43:09
it and all this kind of stuff. But it does happen.
43:12
I saw that video and I was like, what?
43:13
Never saw anything like that in my life.
43:15
That was that was wild. Anyway, OK, all right again.
43:19
You're the other one. You're up.
43:20
All right, all right, all right, all right.
43:22
Would you rather only ever have room temperature coffee or hot
43:28
soda? I guess I got to go with the
43:30
coffee. I think I'd have to go with a
43:31
room temp coffee. Can I add ice?
43:34
Well, that's what I was thinking.
43:34
I'm going to add some ice today. That's what I'm thinking.
43:36
Well, I mean, hot, hot soda, if you add ice is going to keep
43:39
melting. You get watered down.
43:40
So I guess I'll go with the. Room temp coffee I'll.
43:42
Go with the room temp coffee, right?
43:44
I think I could. I could live with room temp
43:46
coffee. I could not live hot soda, no.
43:49
But maybe that would I would no longer drink soda.
43:51
You're right, we'd have to give it up.
43:53
So it's true, OK. Would you rather your phone only
43:59
charged to 42 percent or Only Connect to Wi-Fi with one bar?
44:05
Oh, that's our I'm living that. I'm living the one bar thing all
44:08
the time. So I guess I'll go 42%.
44:12
I would go 42%. I can constantly walk around
44:14
Plus they have to keep charging. Yeah, charging, blocking.
44:16
Just keep the damn thing. So I'm saying, but I'm only 42%.
44:19
OK, well, let's like have my battery life.
44:20
Come on. What do you what?
44:21
I had some. I live, I wouldn't, I wouldn't
44:24
give anything for some data Wi-Fi, No, I wouldn't.
44:27
But I would like some anyway. OK, but.
44:29
I'll last one would you rather every shirt you wear be slightly
44:33
damp or or every chair you sit in be a little warm from someone
44:39
else? That's that is weird.
44:42
I actually heard this. I did hear this this saying that
44:46
there's the only thing worse than a cold toilet seat is a
44:48
warm It really is. I did hear that.
44:50
I was like. Oh.
44:51
That is so. Shutter it's.
44:53
So true. I still got to go.
44:55
As long as it's not a toilet seat, I will.
44:57
You said chair. I'm going to go with the warm
44:59
chair because I. Agree.
45:00
To wear a damp shirt all the time, that would be horrible.
45:04
I once I once had a slightly damp shirt because I pulled it
45:07
out of the dryer and I had to I had to wear it to work and so
45:11
slightly damp. I'm like dry.
45:13
I'm like, I'm blasting the heat on my way.
45:15
I'm like, please dry, please dry, please dry as I'm driving
45:18
in one day. This was, this was, oh, a long
45:20
time ago was before I was working in office.
45:22
But it was, I was like so angry because I was like, my shirt is
45:27
slightly damp. Like you couldn't tell from a
45:30
distance, but I knew, OK, I knew.
45:33
I was like, you can feel touched.
45:35
You can feel it. No one touched me or you'll know
45:37
that my shirt is slightly damp. But yeah, I would have to say a
45:43
slightly warm seat, you know? Yeah, I think that's what I
45:47
would have to go with. OK with that.
45:50
Yeah, for sure. OK, you know, I'll give you one
45:53
more. OK?
45:55
Would you rather have an eyelash in your eye for an hour?
46:00
Fighting an eyelash. It would be horrible.
46:01
Or popcorn kernel stuck in your teeth all day.
46:05
I'm already like, I know my teeth.
46:07
It's I got to go with the popcorn kernel.
46:09
I think so it I don't think it would be as painful as the
46:11
eyelash in the eye. I agree.
46:12
I think it's like my eyes are already watering, thinking about
46:15
it. I know I've got very sensitive.
46:17
Yeah, I've got very sensitive eyes.
46:18
Very sensitive. Look with your special eyes
46:20
look. My bread.
46:23
Yeah, OK, all. Right, what do you got?
46:27
Did we? Have we talked about?
46:29
The Dublin, New York portal. I can't recall if we've talked
46:34
about this yet. We have not, but I know.
46:36
About this a little bit. OK, so there there is a portal
46:41
was it was it's not there anymore.
46:43
It has. It has since been taken down.
46:47
We can't. Have a there was an artist,
46:49
Benedictus Gillis. Can't spell Benedictus without
46:52
Dick. Well, he spells it DIKTA well.
46:56
I'm fucking saying you can't spell it out Dick.
46:58
OK, It works as an audio joke he has.
47:02
He he, he was the the artist behind this art installation.
47:06
OK, He thought, it would be friendly, family friendly
47:12
behavior to set up. For people in New York.
47:17
Yeah, so should have set up a portal in fucking Midwest in
47:21
Kenosha, he said. I think everyone should think of
47:23
a 7 year old child that is in New York that wants to
47:26
experience and wants to connect to Dublin and wave to people
47:31
here. OK, so that was my only request
47:34
for the lovely people of Ireland.
47:36
OK, so he's going to set up this portal.
47:40
It's not really a portal. You can't travel through it.
47:42
No, no, But it's like a it's like a giant constant FaceTime.
47:45
Yeah, it's what it was. That's exactly what it was set
47:47
up so that you could actually see.
47:49
If you were in New York, you could see Dublin, Dublin.
47:52
And if you were in Dublin, yeah, you can see the street that it
47:55
was set up on basically in New York.
47:57
And of course, New Yorkers and Dubliners and Dubliners
48:05
absolutely both pretty much ruined everything.
48:10
Ruined, ruined, ruined it for everyone.
48:14
Or did they make it? Better.
48:15
I think they ruined it because I don't know if you've heard any
48:18
of the any of the things that happened, but I know some of
48:23
them. I have to assume somebody
48:24
flashed somebody there were there was there was mooning
48:28
mold. There's got quite a bit of
48:30
mooning. Swear words were being
48:33
displayed. Well, of course.
48:35
Of course, that would have been the first thing.
48:37
Fuck, but flashing of various body part, that's what I'm
48:41
saying, Yeah. So.
48:47
Did you see? The what?
48:48
There's no. We're not going to post this on
48:50
the base look. We cannot possibly, OK, but you
48:52
can talk. We can talk about it, sure.
48:55
Then the video. It's like just a quick GIF.
48:59
But you, I I know it's the portal because I've just seen
49:01
the thing. But anyway, you see the people
49:04
of Dublin, yes, OK. It's like the people in New York
49:07
are watching the screen, OK? They're all gathered around,
49:09
they're waving. There's all these people in
49:11
Dublin and then all of a sudden you see somebody who you cannot
49:15
see the person because they're too close to the camera.
49:18
And they're reaching up. To like, hold their phone in
49:21
front of the camera. Is what it's all OK?
49:29
It's the stairs. They're smoking.
49:32
And they're showing a video. Yes, I did.
49:34
See that somebody held up the. Phone showing the twin towers
49:37
smoking? Yes, not, not actually having a
49:39
cigarette, but I'm not, I'm not laughing.
49:44
There was a. Woman who flashed shirt up
49:47
flashed the portal. This, this, this went up and
49:49
within a matter of days it ground to a halt, like it had to
49:52
be shut down. I literally I got to.
49:56
Find out how many days but it. Was just a.
49:58
Ridiculously short amount of time and people just could not
50:01
handle it. They just couldn't be
50:02
responsible. No, no, I wouldn't Well, you put
50:04
it in New York and in Dublin. If there's anyone who's going to
50:07
match New Yorker's energy, it's the Irish right?
50:10
Right. OK, now here's the thing.
50:13
I'm not laughing about 911 I. Just want to make a No, No, of
50:16
course not. But Can you imagine showing a
50:19
city their biggest travesty? Yeah.
50:21
Yeah. Why?
50:22
One of the biggest tragedies in history.
50:25
Boom. I don't even know why someone
50:27
would do that. Like, that'd be like, imagine if
50:30
it was set up in, like, Germany and then like, somebody in New
50:33
York holds up a picture of Hitler or something like that.
50:35
Like why in the hell it's so? Smart ass in the crowd.
50:39
The Dublin. New York City.
50:40
Portal was operational for only 6 days.
50:46
It's. Probably 5.
50:47
Probably. Five days to not even a It's too
50:51
long, it was supposed. To be an art installation that
50:55
intending to stream for six. Months and they had to shut it
50:59
down. Due to an.
51:00
Air quote in quotes Inappropriate behavior from
51:03
visitors on both sides. In six days, that is.
51:09
Oh my God, I'm dying. I was like, I heard about Liv
51:13
was the one who told me about this.
51:15
And I'm like, what? What are you talking about?
51:18
Somehow I missed it. I didn't even hear about it.
51:20
And oh, look at the here's the pictures.
51:22
Here's the girl flashing, flashing her top up in the air
51:26
like a wow. Proud moment.
51:29
Proud moment for that mom. Got to love it.
51:33
Some were. Genuinely.
51:35
Awesome. People, it was like people were
51:37
supposed to just go by and and wave and say hi, you know, to
51:41
people and on a whole nother continent.
51:45
And yeah, it didn't go that well.
51:47
One one woman being accused of behaving.
51:49
Indecently in the portal in Dublin that police are taking
51:52
her away. Taking her away.
51:53
Oh my goodness. Unbelievable.
51:56
Oh my gosh, it's. Been, this person wrote.
51:58
It's. Been a lot of ass because
52:00
they're they're like the phone are.
52:02
Getting holding the thought it's.
52:04
Been a lot. It's been a lot of ass.
52:06
No new yogurts. Can be heard screaming and
52:09
chatting. Oh.
52:11
My God, some people went. By and gave a peace sign.
52:15
And you know are made a heart and I'm sure lots of people
52:19
waved you who could. Probably be trusted with this
52:22
the Japanese yeah, you're right you're right because they're.
52:25
Much more respectful. Way more, way more.
52:28
You could put this. Not in New York.
52:33
Who knows? I.
52:34
Really don't know Canada. You're right, Canada.
52:37
Japan could pull this. Off you're right, but.
52:39
You put it in. Dublin, New York and New York
52:41
City. In Dublin.
52:42
Big mistake. Big, huge, huge, huge.
52:45
You're right, You're right. It has to be two countries that
52:47
are much more respectful in their behavior.
52:50
Yes. Oh my God, do you not ask the
52:52
Irish? The Irish will.
52:54
Match the energy of the New Yorkers every time.
52:56
Absolutely. Absolutely.
52:58
Every time. I mean, Can you imagine how many
53:00
drunk people just went by there and mooned between New York and
53:04
Ireland? I can't imagine.
53:05
Yeah, I want. Actually, a shorter list would
53:08
have been how many sober people didn't and didn't show their
53:12
ass. This.
53:15
One person, literally the comment was it was a lot of ass.
53:19
And you know what? The people of.
53:21
Kenosha can relate. Kenosha can absolutely relate.
53:26
And. They will fill.
53:27
Those holes if. You need it.
53:28
I do have one last story I can read to tell you if you want.
53:30
You know what? Let me tell you.
53:31
OK, you tell me. Let me tell you.
53:33
That was a little aggressive. OK, will you have a new Pope?
53:39
Yes, from Chicago. Yes, I.
53:41
Think we talked about this last time we did.
53:42
It we briefly but I touched on it hoping he'd be a good dude
53:45
so. Here's the thing.
53:48
That there has been there's been a little conflict about who's
53:54
the real Pope, really, because not not this not currently, OK,
54:01
just in in history. History, yes.
54:04
And so there are various. They call them anti.
54:08
Popes. Oh yeah, because.
54:11
Because there was. Disagreement.
54:12
You had different factions who wanted their guy to be Pope.
54:15
Yeah. And so they just split and
54:16
they're like, Nope, this. Guy's the fucking Pope.
54:18
This is the real Pope. This is the real Pope.
54:20
I've got your. Imposter An example of anti
54:23
Pope's anti. Pope, John the 23rd OK.
54:29
Anti Pope. Gregory the 12th.
54:34
He was, oh, sore example. OK Gregory if you will part of
54:39
the western schism. He was elected as the legitimate
54:41
Pope in 14 O 6 which further complicated the situation
54:46
because first he was the anti Pope and he was the real Pope.
54:48
Oh, OK, OK, so Yep, other. Notable instances Some people
54:54
believe that. There is a female Pope who
55:00
reigned for two years in the 9th century, but they believe it's
55:03
just a legend. They'll never admit to it, but
55:06
there is the. There is a.
55:09
Throughout history, Heather Church has had a number.
55:10
Of individuals who have. Been falsely proclaimed or
55:13
recognized as Pope. Known as anti popes which is
55:16
hilarious to me. The anti Pope.
55:18
The anti hilarious. Which Pope are you following?
55:22
This year the Brill over the anti Pope.
55:24
These figures arose due to various disagreements with the
55:27
legitimate Pope, be it religious, political or personal
55:30
or personal. I just don't like that guy.
55:33
Leave 2 schisms. Within the church.
55:35
Anti popes have been identified for centuries, with some even
55:37
existing alongside legitimate popes.
55:40
Are you the legit Pope or are you the anti Pope?
55:42
That's hilarious. I'm the uncle Pope, OK?
55:45
Gotcha anti Pope I. Actually heard this story.
55:48
And it's funny, I'm glad you brought it up because in a
55:52
second grade class in a Catholic school in Georgia, they held a
55:55
mock conclave and elected elected their little dude Pope.
56:02
OK, So what a great learning experience, right?
56:04
This teacher sets up this conclave and they follow the
56:07
procedures. They elect David, who is now
56:11
known as Pope David, Pope of the second grade class.
56:16
In. Georgia, I would have started a.
56:18
Schism. Immediately, immediately.
56:21
I would have been like, no, no, Jessica is the anti.
56:24
I do not recognize David recognize as David Pope.
56:28
Nope, anti. Pope.
56:31
Over here. So this emperors.
56:35
Participated in the voting. And chose the Pope.
56:37
OK, we know it's David. Well, you know that every single
56:40
in the second grade is a cardinal.
56:42
It's true. It's true.
56:43
They are all. Cardinals and girls, good for
56:45
them. Yes.
56:47
Following the vote, the students witnessed the appearance of
56:49
white smoke signaling the the selection of their new Pope,
56:53
David Howard. Somehow the teacher manages to
56:56
get the white smoke. Going up.
56:57
Pope David had a special Pope mobile to tour around the school
57:02
grounds. That's so fucking.
57:05
Cute. So cute.
57:07
The students celebrated the. Election with treats.
57:08
Including Lolly. Popes on interviewing.
57:13
Pope David, what's it like to be Pope?
57:17
OK. His answer was.
57:18
Being Pope is hard. 2nd grade it's a Pope of the like 5 minute
57:26
Pope. Is no true.
57:28
No true words have ever been spoken.
57:30
I think Pope is hard. You relate.
57:32
Every Pope would relate and concur Pope.
57:34
Is hard that being Pope is hard I.
57:37
Thought that was the most adorable story, I loved it so
57:41
much. I I thought it was so, so, so
57:43
cute. Have I talked about the
57:44
Popemobile? Not, not, no, no, you have not.
57:49
In in a car's sense, no. From cars.
57:52
Oh, it's, it's hilarious. It's it makes an appearance.
57:54
Yeah, he says. He's the Popemobile Catholic.
57:56
Or whatever. He's the Popemobile.
57:57
Catholic he is in. He does make an appearance.
57:59
With the car, he's got eyeballs and everything.
58:03
Little eyeball. Look at the Pope.
58:04
Inside the Pope car. Look at my little.
58:07
Look at his little. Little has little has little
58:10
cross on it. My God, is the Pope mobile
58:13
Catholic? Oh my.
58:14
God, I remember. I do remember that.
58:15
Now. Now did I tell you that that?
58:19
While a funny joke implies the existence of Jesus Chrysler, Oh
58:25
my God, you did not just say that.
58:29
Within the Cars universe and within the Cars universe.
58:31
That Jesus Chrysler was sacrificed, crucified.
58:34
Crucified. Clearly, how do you crucify a
58:36
car? I don't.
58:37
Know tires up, I guess. Tires, tires up.
58:41
I did see Jesus. Chrysler's supercar, which is
58:45
interesting. Oh no.
58:46
Oh, look at this. He's handing me the keys.
58:49
Jesus Christ. Or superstar Supercar.
58:52
Supercar. I said supercar and he's handing
58:55
over the keys to apparently the supercar too.
58:58
I guess. Adam, what is happening?
59:00
That's beautiful. That's hilarious.
59:02
That's why This is why I. Pay for the Internet.
59:04
This is why. This is why I pay for the.
59:05
Internet. Without the Internet, how would
59:09
we have learned about Kenosha wanting to fill holes?
59:12
I'm just saying without the Internet, and you know what, we
59:15
don't know, the whole of Pope has been filled as well.
59:18
It's true. It's true in Georgia and in
59:21
Vatican City. I'll connect everything to
59:24
Georgia. Yeah, the little second grader
59:26
from Georgia. Now listen this I'm on the
59:28
Pixar. Cars.
59:29
Wiki. Oh, the fan wiki.
59:32
The fan wiki. And there is a.
59:34
There is an image. A photoshopped image.
59:36
Of Jesus Chrysler. Somebody made him.
59:38
He's got a beard. He looks.
59:40
Like he looks like, is that the king?
59:42
Is that a crown of thorns? Well, he's fucking Jesus, he's
59:46
doing. What to Jesus?
59:48
God bless Jesus Chrysler. Is the equivalent of Jesus
59:54
Christ. In the court, I'm reading the
59:56
fucking thing. I'm sorry.
59:57
Go ahead. Jesus Chrysler.
1:00:01
Is the equivalent of Jesus. Christ in the Cars universe.
1:00:03
While never directly referenced by name nor visually represented
1:00:07
in any of the films, the existence of a Pope, and by
1:00:09
extension Roman Catholicism in the Cars universe implies his
1:00:13
existence in universe by default.
1:00:15
He is presumably worshipped as the son of the manufacturer.
1:00:23
Of the manufacturer. Speculative biography.
1:00:27
I'm going to have to, really. Dig in to this wiki because
1:00:30
there's some good content that's hilarious.
1:00:32
Speculative biography for for Jesus Chrysler.
1:00:36
OK, according to the The Holy Maintenance Guide, the car
1:00:40
equivalent to the Bible. OK Jesus Chrysler was born in a
1:00:43
humble garage in the small Middle Eastern village of
1:00:46
Bentley Hem. Oh my God.
1:00:49
Bentley Hem. Wow.
1:00:52
OK, nonetheless, whose birth had been?
1:00:54
Preemptively declared to his mother, the Virgo Mary a Humble.
1:01:01
Righteous. Micro car by an Angel.
1:01:05
Of the manufacturer, Nothing forever, nothing will ever.
1:01:10
Prepare you to read the words Bentley.
1:01:12
Bentley home What is happening? Oh my gosh.
1:01:19
Good. Day, but it's been a long week.
1:01:21
OK, it's Tuesday. Wow.
1:01:24
That is good. I'll tell.
1:01:26
You what? That's good.
1:01:28
Oh, he is tagged in characters. Deceased.
1:01:31
Characters made in 2021 and Jewish characters.
1:01:35
How many Jewish cars are there? Well, he was Jewish, just Jesus
1:01:38
Christ. Just Jesus Christ, Sir, I'm
1:01:40
sorry, what is this? What?
1:01:43
What do you mean a minute, Joseph?
1:01:44
Stalling. Are you telling me what's this
1:01:49
time? To to do this, this is gotta
1:01:52
have you right in the giggle dig.
1:01:55
Exactly why is it? The Beaver, Joseph Stalling,
1:01:58
1878 to 1950. 3 was a Georgia revolutionary political leader
1:02:02
who governed the Soviet Union from 1924 until his death in
1:02:05
1953. He served as both the general
1:02:07
secretary of. The carmunism.
1:02:09
The carmunism are you kidding me?
1:02:11
The Carmunism. The Carmunism.
1:02:14
The Carmunism Party of the Soviet Union.
1:02:17
In the chair car of the Council of Ministers of the Soviet
1:02:20
Union. It was a 1933 Ford coupe.
1:02:26
Trivia. He was the car equivalent of
1:02:28
dresses. Stalin who?
1:02:29
Is writing this stuff? Wait, there's a picture?
1:02:32
And then they make a picture of it too.
1:02:34
Look at his, it looks like his mustache.
1:02:36
Well, apparently he's a Lightning Queen fan.
1:02:38
He is. He's all decked out one comment.
1:02:42
Why? That's what they mean.
1:02:44
It was me. Why?
1:02:46
You're the Zilla Q. That's hilarious.
1:02:49
Oh man. I tell you what, though, there's
1:02:51
some creative people out there, you know good and good for them,
1:02:54
right? And you know what?
1:02:55
Without the Internet, we wouldn't know about Joseph
1:02:58
Stalin. Who knew?
1:02:59
We wouldn't know about. We wouldn't know about
1:03:01
Bentleyhem. Either Bentleyhem that's a
1:03:04
that's. A problem for me, the tears,
1:03:06
real tears. That one really got her.
1:03:09
That one really got. Her Oh my gosh, guardianism.
1:03:14
Who is who is coming up with these things?
1:03:17
Wow all right mobile, I had to circle back.
1:03:20
We'll we'll post a picture of the Popemobile the the.
1:03:23
Car is universe Popemobile. The the the fact that there's a
1:03:26
tiny car inside of the Popemobile which is also a car,
1:03:29
right? Maybe that's David Who?
1:03:32
Maybe. Maybe that's David.
1:03:33
I got to find a picture of him. I wonder.
1:03:35
If they posted a picture of him. Pinion the 4th.
1:03:38
That's what he is, That's what his.
1:03:40
Name is, he's Pope. Pinion the field as a character.
1:03:42
In cars too. His job was protected transport.
1:03:44
Pope Pinion the 4th. Oh my God that's hilarious.
1:03:47
I didn't. Know that?
1:03:49
That's awesome. OK, All right.
1:03:51
I got stop living. All right, I I don't know about
1:03:55
you. All right, well, I don't know
1:04:02
about you, but after this. I'm going to need some serious
1:04:05
beef and some serious holes. Bye bye.