Latest / Love You Moore with Willie Moore Jr. / He Was Everything I Asked For… Until He Wasn’t | Joi Hunt | Love You Moore Show

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He Was Everything I Asked For… Until He Wasn’t | Joi Hunt | Love You Moore Show · Love You Moore with Willie Moore Jr.

0:00
[SPEAKER_04]: His episode is brought to you by my friends at RX Outreach, a 4-to-Poe-Poscription, Medication for anyone.
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0:19
[SPEAKER_04]: Next, on the Love of Your Moorship, going through divorce is very, very unique.
0:23
[SPEAKER_04]: Tell the people a little bit about your story.
0:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Woo, just marry the wrong person.
0:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Just marry the wrong person, didn't ask God about this one.
0:30
[SPEAKER_02]: And when you marry the wrong person, it's gonna cost you a lot to get out sometimes.
0:35
[SPEAKER_02]: And so having a lot of business together, wanting to leave, he just didn't make leaving easy.
0:40
[SPEAKER_02]: And so when he knew I was divorcing him, we're running like we're at our dealership and he put a gun out and said he's gonna kill me.
0:47
[SPEAKER_02]: And shot a bullet through my office wall, went through my wall.
0:51
[SPEAKER_02]: through the other bathroom wall and skinned and employee on her thigh and my son was in there.
0:57
[SPEAKER_02]: I had to run out the dealership and that's when I was just like, how did I get here?
1:02
[SPEAKER_04]: Joy Hunt, serial entrepreneur, author, powerhouse, and social media influence impacting women and men all across the country with her transparent testimony from broke it to the back.
1:14
[SPEAKER_04]: Ladies and gentlemen, the one and only Joy Hunt.
1:18
[SPEAKER_04]: Wow, the opportunity to hang out with George Hunn.
1:21
[SPEAKER_04]: Let's just jump right into it.
1:23
[SPEAKER_04]: I see you online, super entrepreneur, of course, new book, come on, don't hide the book, divide the book.
1:30
[SPEAKER_04]: Come on, from broken to the bank.
1:32
[SPEAKER_04]: You know, you know, there are a lot of people on the other side of this thing who right now be maybe in their broken part, correct?
1:39
[SPEAKER_04]: And maybe they're looking at that bank thing to themselves, Lord, you're going to have to do something, correct?
1:42
[SPEAKER_04]: I got more money than money, correct?
1:44
[SPEAKER_04]: Going through divorce is very, very unique.
1:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Woo, um, just marry the wrong person, just marry the wrong person, didn't ask about this one.
1:53
[SPEAKER_02]: And when you marry the wrong person's going to cost you a lot to get out sometimes.
1:58
[SPEAKER_02]: And so having a lot of business together wanting to leave, he just didn't make leaving easy.
2:03
[SPEAKER_02]: And so when I, when he knew I was divorcing him, we're running like we're at our dealership and he put a gun out and said he's going to kill me and shot a bullet
2:14
[SPEAKER_02]: through the other bathroom wall and skinned and employee on her thigh and my son was in there.
2:20
[SPEAKER_02]: I had to run off the dealership and that's when I was just like, how did I get here?
2:26
[SPEAKER_04]: So joy, let's go back a little bit.
2:29
[SPEAKER_04]: So you said you married the wrong person.
2:32
[SPEAKER_04]: Correct.
2:33
[SPEAKER_04]: How old were you when?
2:35
[SPEAKER_04]: How did you meet this guy?
2:37
[SPEAKER_02]: Funny thing I made about the club.
2:39
[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe about the club.
2:40
[SPEAKER_02]: What city?
2:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Houston.
2:42
[SPEAKER_04]: Oh yeah.
2:42
[SPEAKER_04]: Hey, you son of my bro, trio.
2:46
[SPEAKER_04]: He's not what trio, Neil.
2:48
[SPEAKER_04]: No, go ahead.
2:50
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, you're Houston.
2:52
[SPEAKER_02]: And I had gotten to a pariah checked off all the boxes.
2:55
[SPEAKER_02]: I was an attorney, I was making money, I had my own stuff.
2:58
[SPEAKER_02]: And it was just time for the husband and the kids.
3:01
[SPEAKER_02]: And so I was like, okay, you know, he was, maybe I'm at the club and he was cute, you know what I'm saying?
3:06
[SPEAKER_02]: We had dinner and we just buy.
3:08
[SPEAKER_02]: And I made them the steak of, you know, he had the conversation like, well, what do you want in a person?
3:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I want ABCD and E and guess who became ABCD and E. Oh, he was everything I asked for.
3:21
[SPEAKER_04]: So how do you say you found a wrong person when you made your boxes?
3:25
[SPEAKER_04]: He checks out of those boxes.
3:27
[SPEAKER_04]: How did he become a mistake if, like, that's what a social media says.
3:31
[SPEAKER_04]: He got a hat in, he should look like this, he should do this.
3:34
[SPEAKER_04]: You get all the boxes, but he's still the wrong person.
3:36
[SPEAKER_04]: Well, when someone pretends to be all what you say.
3:42
[SPEAKER_02]: When you tell a man what you want, and he's a toxic man, he will put a mask on, he will play a role.
3:49
[SPEAKER_02]: He will be give you a Academy Award performance to get you.
3:54
[SPEAKER_02]: And then as the relationship progressed, the mask kept slipping and slipping and slipping and the real person kept showing up, showing up, showing up, showing up.
4:05
[SPEAKER_04]: How long were you married?
4:12
[SPEAKER_02]: The mass, I would say, came off, was coming off instantly.
4:16
[SPEAKER_02]: The second I got pregnant.
4:17
[SPEAKER_02]: So we got married in July.
4:19
[SPEAKER_02]: I was pregnant by the following May or maybe that May.
4:30
[SPEAKER_02]: And pregnancy when I kind of just, him not being as nice as he was in the beginning.
4:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Like a little mean, a little more selfish.
4:37
[SPEAKER_02]: And then just over time,
4:40
[SPEAKER_02]: He was neglectful.
4:42
[SPEAKER_02]: He was very controlling.
4:44
[SPEAKER_02]: He was nice nasty, really passive aggressive.
4:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Um, always giving my life.
4:52
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, that's not that big.
4:53
[SPEAKER_02]: And then and then and so over time, it just became really unbearable.
4:58
[SPEAKER_04]: Got it.
4:59
[SPEAKER_04]: So you get into this marriage.
5:02
[SPEAKER_04]: You realize this is not working.
5:05
[SPEAKER_04]: Like going back to the beginning, how long did you date before you said I do?
5:10
[SPEAKER_02]: mistake number one, you want to see someone through all seasons.
5:13
[SPEAKER_02]: So we dated our second date was in the Bahamas out of order.
5:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I was making the bread.
5:20
[SPEAKER_02]: You know a bag, you want to like you want to go to dinner?
5:25
[SPEAKER_02]: No, let's go to the Bahamas.
5:27
[SPEAKER_02]: Correct.
5:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
5:28
[SPEAKER_02]: So we got engaged.
5:30
[SPEAKER_02]: I would say within a year of dating.
5:32
[SPEAKER_02]: And then we had a really like I call it a shotgun wedding.
5:36
[SPEAKER_02]: went to Vegas and this got married.
5:37
[SPEAKER_02]: Most pregnancies we wanted to use that money for our business.
5:41
[SPEAKER_02]: We got to business together a hair extension company.
5:44
[SPEAKER_02]: And so we just went to Vegas.
5:45
[SPEAKER_02]: Hey y'all want y'all want con our wedding.
5:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Come on, we get married in two weeks.
5:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Let's go.
5:49
[SPEAKER_02]: And we've got the Vegas and got married.
5:52
[SPEAKER_04]: So how did you grow up, right?
5:56
[SPEAKER_04]: Like, did you grow up with mom and dad in the home?
5:59
[SPEAKER_04]: Was it just mom?
6:00
[SPEAKER_02]: No, I grew up in the typical two parent home.
6:03
[SPEAKER_02]: Dad was, you know, the alpha man provider.
6:06
[SPEAKER_02]: Mom worked for dad's business in, was to stay at home.
6:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Mom and I was in Girl Scouts and Charms School.
6:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Them beauty passions and AU basketball.
6:14
[SPEAKER_02]: We did all the things and my brother was in Boy Scouts and golf and we did all of the things.
6:20
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
6:21
[SPEAKER_04]: And so when you were growing up, you say in a healthy marriage, you got a chance to see two people that were really in love or did was a very unique growing up.
6:30
[SPEAKER_02]: I saw a great dad in a great mom.
6:35
[SPEAKER_02]: I did not see a good husband.
6:38
[SPEAKER_02]: And so growing up, I'll be like, well, I'm definitely not, I don't, you know, man, because I want someone who's catering to me where my mom was always catering to my dad, but I didn't see it reciprocate.
6:51
[SPEAKER_04]: Right.
6:53
[SPEAKER_04]: So when you when you don't see that that you think you do a did you that you did a good job of being more of a give or to your former husband, because you know, I always like to, you know, of course, there's no excuse for shooting the neck and the fool.
7:06
[SPEAKER_04]: Correct.
7:06
[SPEAKER_04]: Let's get that out the way crazy.
7:08
[SPEAKER_04]: But when you look back, is there anything in the marriage you say, I, I wish I'm, I probably could have done this a little bit.
7:16
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm sure there are other things I could have done better.
7:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Now, I am a giver.
7:22
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm a giver.
7:23
[SPEAKER_02]: My problem is I overgiv.
7:25
[SPEAKER_02]: So I don't think giving was an issue.
7:28
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm gonna take so many things off your plate, that all you have to do is just, you just go be the man and go get it.
7:33
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm a handle, everything else.
7:35
[SPEAKER_02]: So I don't think I could give anymore.
7:37
[SPEAKER_04]: got it.
7:38
[SPEAKER_04]: So let's let's let's go back into into this marriage.
7:42
[SPEAKER_04]: You in there.
7:44
[SPEAKER_04]: You finally say enough is enough.
7:47
[SPEAKER_04]: Like what was the spark that made you say, I got to get a divorce.
7:51
[SPEAKER_04]: You said that he decided to shoot after he found out you were serious, but was there something that came up that made you feel like, oh, I can't do this any more.
8:00
[SPEAKER_02]: I found a video and have it on the beach with the one of our employees.
8:06
[SPEAKER_02]: But before that, we had already been talking about divorce.
8:09
[SPEAKER_02]: He was just always wanting to be out with his friends.
8:13
[SPEAKER_02]: We never did date night.
8:14
[SPEAKER_02]: You ever heard of like a loveless marriage?
8:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Were you kind of just with the roommate?
8:18
[SPEAKER_02]: That's what our marriage had begun.
8:20
[SPEAKER_02]: And so I'm like, okay, so I ain't happy.
8:22
[SPEAKER_02]: You ain't happy, so why be still here?
8:24
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh no, I want the family in.
8:26
[SPEAKER_02]: I have a son at 13-year-old little boy in at the time he was eight.
8:30
[SPEAKER_02]: I grew up in a two-parent home and he had a two-parent home, so this was a two-parent home was very important, but over time My he always had it at a temper So if he would get mad anything this whole this table with what would be broken He gonna break something no matter where we are at a hotel gonna be home in a while, but the the vows was never at me over time now We're gonna chunk
8:54
[SPEAKER_02]: or he'll take all the China just throw it at me.
8:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Like so now the bounce started to come to me.
8:59
[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm like, well, I need to kind of get out of this because this really isn't normal, but I don't want to think that there's no way I'm married to a abusive comes who's smart for that, but he's, he's just angry.
9:10
[SPEAKER_02]: He's just upset right now.
9:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Let me just, let me just walk on one leg.
9:14
[SPEAKER_02]: Let me just not breathe.
9:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Let me just try to change what I'm doing and I realize I'm walking on egg shells.
9:20
[SPEAKER_02]: He gets mad at anything, is where is that he may it?
9:24
[SPEAKER_02]: So I can never control when he won't be mad.
9:27
[SPEAKER_02]: And whenever he's mad, he's starting to throw things.
9:29
[SPEAKER_02]: And now my son is seeing this.
9:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And now I'm like, okay, why don't you like?
9:33
[SPEAKER_02]: He can't see a man, because he's gonna duplicate everything.
9:36
[SPEAKER_02]: He sees.
9:36
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't want him seeing that.
9:37
[SPEAKER_02]: So hey, I think we're scared to force.
9:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I ain't mad, I ain't sure I'm like, no, let's work on.
9:42
[SPEAKER_02]: So now we're in marriage counseling as he's having this affair with our employee.
9:49
[SPEAKER_02]: So when I find out about the affair more aggravated, because I'm like a couple months ago, I was just saying, I'm cool with a divorce.
9:56
[SPEAKER_02]: So I feel like your purpose is wanting to hurt me more because you're in counseling as you have a mistress.
10:02
[SPEAKER_02]: Is that makes sense to you, Willie?
10:03
[SPEAKER_04]: No, no.
10:04
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
10:05
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
10:06
[SPEAKER_04]: Well, I'll be honest with you, like I've been on the other side.
10:10
[SPEAKER_04]: I haven't been that man within the employee or whatever, but I had checked out and overlapped a relationship.
10:19
[SPEAKER_04]: filing for divorce and still doing it.
10:20
[SPEAKER_04]: So I mean, if you would ask hers, you'd be like, yeah, well, he was, you know, he's doing the same thing.
10:25
[SPEAKER_04]: I mean, you know, but once I was out, I was out.
10:27
[SPEAKER_04]: If we talked about divorce and I said, yes, my yes, me, yes, my no, me, no, right?
10:31
[SPEAKER_04]: Right.
10:33
[SPEAKER_04]: But what did that do to a woman of your stature to know that with all you've accomplished, it's beautiful as you are, respectfully, that the man that you said I do to chose someone else.
10:47
[SPEAKER_04]: What did that do to your heart?
10:52
[SPEAKER_02]: to be honest, him choosing someone else didn't bother me because he was so misaligned.
10:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Good.
10:59
[SPEAKER_02]: And who he chose, I said, it all makes sense now.
11:03
[SPEAKER_02]: Because every time I'm wanting you to exhale and become a better person, it's I'm always getting
11:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Rebuttal, you don't want to grow.
11:15
[SPEAKER_02]: What crush me was the lack of respect.
11:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Because I met my husband when he had nothing.
11:20
[SPEAKER_02]: He had to be building this.
11:21
[SPEAKER_02]: He had to club, this is a lot of it.
11:23
[SPEAKER_02]: This is in Beaumont, Texas.
11:24
[SPEAKER_02]: And he had to club and store out of it.
11:26
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm in their pating the stores.
11:28
[SPEAKER_02]: I have literally been with him with every single phase.
11:31
[SPEAKER_02]: Every mistake he's made, it's okay.
11:33
[SPEAKER_02]: You are a can, you're wonderful.
11:35
[SPEAKER_02]: I pick up the pieces.
11:37
[SPEAKER_02]: The least you could do is have some respect for me.
11:40
[SPEAKER_02]: And so it was the lack of respect after all I've done for you that that was the dagger in the heart.
11:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe go find whoever you want to go ahead and be happy.
11:49
[SPEAKER_02]: I ain't tripped.
11:50
[SPEAKER_02]: But this, I thought you would have a little more class when it came to dealing with me.
11:54
[SPEAKER_02]: And that wasn't the case.
11:56
[SPEAKER_04]: So you find out, of course, you probably weren't nice at that point like I'm done.
12:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Done.
12:03
[SPEAKER_04]: So the rumor is that instead of just leaving the moving going out of time, you kind of moved
12:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I just went up time to get my son was gonna have both his parents.
12:13
[SPEAKER_04]: Got it, so you move, got it.
12:15
[SPEAKER_02]: So I moved the next subdivision.
12:17
[SPEAKER_02]: I went to, I met work.
12:19
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm up.
12:20
[SPEAKER_02]: I didn't pour no bleach on no clothes.
12:22
[SPEAKER_02]: I didn't slash on, I'm going to work.
12:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Don't know when at the office, no what's going on.
12:26
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm not going to mess the money.
12:27
[SPEAKER_02]: And my son is not going to see me come out of pocket.
12:30
[SPEAKER_02]: We are working with all this as I'm moving as I'm transitioning, keeping everything, keeping everything just aligned.
12:45
[SPEAKER_02]: When I was in law school, I had a professor.
12:48
[SPEAKER_02]: And she told me, whenever you come out of character, you're showing who you are, not what the other person does.
12:56
[SPEAKER_02]: And she was saying that, sorry.
13:00
[SPEAKER_02]: She was saying that you never want to go off on anyone while you're in law school, because you never know when you may need them again, and who they may be 10 years from now.
13:09
[SPEAKER_02]: So what she was saying was don't be dating someone in law school when they, you know, you find out something happened.
13:13
[SPEAKER_02]: You go tear his car up and then five years later, he's the governor.
13:16
[SPEAKER_02]: You need him.
13:17
[SPEAKER_02]: But that's stuck with me.
13:19
[SPEAKER_02]: So however, I handle myself.
13:20
[SPEAKER_02]: For God, you can do it.
13:22
[SPEAKER_02]: What you want about how I handle myself determines my value and my integrity.
13:27
[SPEAKER_02]: So my whole thing was, I'm not going to let you get me out of my square.
13:31
[SPEAKER_02]: So you can do all these things and you can betray me and hurt me, but you're not going to get me out of character.
13:37
[SPEAKER_04]: That's admirable, because most people can't do that.
13:40
[SPEAKER_04]: It's going to end up on the internet that we got to out this guy.
13:44
[SPEAKER_04]: We got to let him know that you can never do me that way, but it's not about him.
13:49
[SPEAKER_02]: It's about me.
13:50
[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm going to remove myself.
13:53
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to go heal and I'm going to just go live better.
13:57
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
13:57
[SPEAKER_02]: Because if I make the focus on you, now I'm giving you all the attention.
14:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, she really hurt.
14:02
[SPEAKER_02]: No, I'm not even worried about it.
14:03
[SPEAKER_02]: I got, I got the video of them having, at the time, I had access to like five business Instagram pages.
14:10
[SPEAKER_02]: I could go put the whole video and let the whole world see it.
14:13
[SPEAKER_02]: But it's not about you.
14:15
[SPEAKER_02]: It's about me.
14:16
[SPEAKER_02]: I must remove myself because what I brought to that relationship is going to kill you to not have me in your life.
14:23
[SPEAKER_04]: More love you more podcast after this.
14:27
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I think that people perish because of that lack of knowledge, right?
15:17
[SPEAKER_00]: It's been long said that you have to have this type of credit score to buy a house.
15:22
[SPEAKER_00]: To be honest with you, if you're a hustler and you got 20% credit score don't really matter.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Wow.
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15:39
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15:53
[SPEAKER_02]: It's not about you.
15:54
[SPEAKER_02]: It's about me I'm as removed myself because what I'm what I brought to that relationship is gonna kill you to not have me in your life I'm good but I haven't without having you
16:07
[SPEAKER_04]: So joy, you, you sit in there, you win this deal of shit, you hear these big pops, it goes through the wall, evidently you got out safe.
16:17
[SPEAKER_04]: Correct.
16:18
[SPEAKER_04]: What are your next steps?
16:20
[SPEAKER_02]: I moved to Orlando.
16:22
[SPEAKER_02]: My brother lived in Orlando.
16:23
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah, so you take your son.
16:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Take my son and move to Orlando.
16:27
[SPEAKER_02]: He didn't know I was in Orlando.
16:29
[SPEAKER_02]: He thought that I had just, I was just up the street.
16:32
[SPEAKER_02]: We were I was working remote after the shooting.
16:35
[SPEAKER_02]: He was the sales person at the dealership.
16:37
[SPEAKER_02]: So I said, I'll work from home.
16:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I will, we would talk through his dad at the middle man but all the deals.
16:43
[SPEAKER_02]: So they're, they're thinking that I'm just working up the street from home, but I'm actually in Florida.
16:50
[SPEAKER_02]: Three days later, they take all the money out the accounts, lock me out the businesses, and February the 2022.
16:56
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm, I'm had to pay my
17:01
[SPEAKER_02]: left a $10,000 a month mortgage for the home, uh, any car you can think of in the driveway, Rose Rose coming in, G-Wag in the home nine, and money gone.
17:21
[SPEAKER_04]: Geez, what does Joy do now when you try to swipe your credit card or whatever?
17:29
[SPEAKER_02]: My mom helped me, my mom paid my rent.
17:32
[SPEAKER_02]: I'd already pay for my divorce attorney.
17:35
[SPEAKER_02]: I had to come up with some money because I didn't ask you the business.
17:39
[SPEAKER_02]: And I said, God, I don't know what you're doing.
17:43
[SPEAKER_04]: I don't know what you're doing.
17:45
[SPEAKER_02]: But I know one thing I can't get out of this one.
17:50
[SPEAKER_02]: So I just need you to show me the steps.
17:53
[SPEAKER_02]: I gotta make, I have no idea what you're doing.
17:57
[SPEAKER_02]: but I know there was no way in hell I'd enslaved for 10 years building an enterprise for it to just be gone.
18:03
[SPEAKER_02]: So see, sometimes God gonna take everything from you to get your attention, to get your ear, and to have you just to be steel.
18:11
[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm just steel, I'm like, I gotta pay some bills, so what am I gonna do?
18:17
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm a brick and mortar girl.
18:18
[SPEAKER_02]: I have dealerships, salon, I'm used to a place and I get people to the place.
18:23
[SPEAKER_02]: I have no idea about this online business and then be honest, I think online coaches are a scam at the time.
18:29
[SPEAKER_02]: If you knew what to do while you coach, you know why you're not doing it.
18:32
[SPEAKER_02]: That was my philosophy.
18:34
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
18:34
[SPEAKER_02]: But I had no money with it.
18:37
[SPEAKER_02]: So I got to do something.
18:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I got to make something shake, right?
18:40
[SPEAKER_02]: So that's okay, well, what if I just,
18:45
[SPEAKER_02]: talk about business, I like real business.
18:47
[SPEAKER_02]: It's good online, by the course, and being a millionaire in train for hours, and I'm like, oh, this is crazy.
18:52
[SPEAKER_02]: So I don't wanna talk about some real stuff.
18:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Like if you haven't found, if you haven't found a bankruptcy, you've never really been in business before.
18:58
[SPEAKER_02]: And this is next.
18:59
[SPEAKER_02]: So I started just giving out real business, a real business advice, and I started forming LL Season 2 on consultation.
19:06
[SPEAKER_02]: I was just trying to do anything on social media, trying to get someone to book with me in.
19:12
[SPEAKER_02]: People book, let me, I got a lot of marketing.
19:14
[SPEAKER_02]: I got a lot of marketing skill.
19:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Come on, I don't play with a stay with it.
19:17
[SPEAKER_02]: Don't.
19:19
[SPEAKER_02]: But God was just...
19:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my God, I need the rent money.
19:23
[SPEAKER_02]: He gave me three times, but my rent money was.
19:25
[SPEAKER_02]: And I was like, okay, bet God's telling me, this is my lane.
19:28
[SPEAKER_02]: All right, now, if me being a friend of this camera going to do something, let me go upon the show, right?
19:34
[SPEAKER_02]: So now, now I'm dancing now.
19:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Now I'm not going this way anymore.
19:38
[SPEAKER_02]: Now let me go ahead and give, you know, give the streets what they want.
19:41
[SPEAKER_02]: And God just blessed and it just started to grow and grow and grow and grow.
19:47
[SPEAKER_02]: And after the first time I've ever made money just I would go to bed and wake up and there's money in my account I'm still in digital product the grant bundle and that was just moving now on the court case I'm getting nowhere.
20:01
[SPEAKER_04]: I'm How long did it take for a day?
20:03
[SPEAKER_04]: We're on year four of the doors.
20:06
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm still in my divorce
20:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Six, most of us six figures year four.
20:11
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, yeah, you got, yeah.
20:13
[SPEAKER_04]: I mean, I'm so sorry.
20:15
[SPEAKER_02]: It's, here's the thing.
20:16
[SPEAKER_02]: The first year was crazy.
20:18
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
20:19
[SPEAKER_02]: God, I was like, God, I couldn't get what God was doing.
20:22
[SPEAKER_02]: But the way God is blessing me, I felt like God purposely has not closed this chapter because he don't want me to think that I'm winning because of my divorce element.
20:34
[SPEAKER_02]: He wants me to show me, I'm with you.
20:38
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm the only thing that you need.
20:40
[SPEAKER_02]: See, a lot of times we think you need the business part and we need this.
20:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Sometimes all you need is God.
20:45
[SPEAKER_02]: God will take you place you never even asked to go.
20:49
[SPEAKER_02]: And this season I'm in right now is nothing but that blood God blessing.
20:52
[SPEAKER_02]: He is just,
20:55
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm on your podcast.
20:56
[SPEAKER_02]: I ain't never want to be known or in people everywhere our goal, people are stopping me.
21:02
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm just like, hey, number God, yeah.
21:05
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm still fighting my divorce, but I have so much peace, so much joy.
21:10
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm really living my best life in the midst of all of this.
21:14
[SPEAKER_02]: So that's what I'm like.
21:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe I'll say, well, tell me the stats, baby, it's God.
21:19
[SPEAKER_02]: And I know you think I'm playing with you in a nothing
21:24
[SPEAKER_04]: Joy you have is 13 year old boy and I just believe every boy needs a father.
21:28
[SPEAKER_04]: How do you reconcile that to make sure he has the opportunity of his father wants to be a part of his life?
21:35
[SPEAKER_02]: He can his father can come see him once a month.
21:37
[SPEAKER_02]: We have our custody arranged with that's been filed so he can come see him once a month.
21:41
[SPEAKER_02]: We alternate Thanksgiving and Christmas like whatever whatever the court agreement does, I follow that.
21:47
[SPEAKER_04]: Good.
21:48
[SPEAKER_02]: But then I don't talk.
21:49
[SPEAKER_02]: We talk via an amp because that's my boundary.
21:51
[SPEAKER_02]: You will never Oh, yeah, you got to head it out.
21:54
[SPEAKER_04]: You got to head it out to those of you don't know what that anf is.
21:57
[SPEAKER_04]: Don't worry about it.
21:58
[SPEAKER_04]: Don't get divorced.
21:59
[SPEAKER_04]: And you won't have to shout out to my brother.
22:02
[SPEAKER_04]: That's the only way, but he is, you know, he's a strong deep personality.
22:06
[SPEAKER_04]: I'm a little bit more like, well, the Lord, he's just like
22:09
[SPEAKER_04]: boundaries.
22:11
[SPEAKER_02]: You're trying to be nice, correct boundaries.
22:13
[SPEAKER_04]: Only.
22:14
[SPEAKER_04]: That's it.
22:14
[SPEAKER_04]: I'm not only.
22:15
[SPEAKER_04]: I want my children.
22:17
[SPEAKER_04]: My brother told me be looking at me like, he's a nice one.
22:21
[SPEAKER_04]: I don't have any of what he had.
22:24
[SPEAKER_04]: I know that stuff.
22:25
[SPEAKER_04]: The little brother guy.
22:27
[SPEAKER_04]: He's the nice one.
22:28
[SPEAKER_04]: I don't play.
22:29
[SPEAKER_04]: Correct.
22:29
[SPEAKER_04]: So don't play with me.
22:30
[SPEAKER_04]: So you're looking at this 13 year old boy now.
22:32
[SPEAKER_04]: And I know you love him.
22:33
[SPEAKER_04]: So as you came into my house, you know, um, to those of you don't know.
22:36
[SPEAKER_04]: I have a few things in the house that's
22:39
[SPEAKER_04]: And she was like, my son, what, and I say in the mother and you, what type of mother have you become in the process of all of this?
22:46
[SPEAKER_02]: If I were to be transparent, if I didn't have my son, I would be on my mom's couch.
22:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Sean, find me a man with some money.
22:56
[SPEAKER_02]: That's what I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,
23:15
[SPEAKER_02]: I was so drained from my merits like when you were in a narcissistic relationship is just it takes a life out of you and I didn't have another run in me and so I was like I have a good run.
23:28
[SPEAKER_02]: This is it.
23:29
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm just be here my mom.
23:31
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm I'm done but I couldn't let that little boy see me give up because the crazy thing is.
23:39
[SPEAKER_02]: We were flying before the money got taken out the count.
23:42
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, we will come back to Houston and visit and my son has never flown a economy.
23:47
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't only first class when the money got taken, we had to come back to Florida economy.
23:53
[SPEAKER_02]: So he's like, mommy, there is no 26 E. I'm like, oh, I just keep going.
23:59
[SPEAKER_02]: He looked me like,
24:02
[SPEAKER_02]: What are you doing there?
24:03
[SPEAKER_02]: And I was like, yeah, let's listen, do see.
24:06
[SPEAKER_02]: Just give my music.
24:07
[SPEAKER_02]: I need six months.
24:08
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to get a plan.
24:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Let's give me six months to get myself back to get that we're going to be just fine.
24:13
[SPEAKER_02]: Cause he's used to being on door dash Amazon every day.
24:18
[SPEAKER_02]: And so for the first couple of months, it was Little Seasers Pizza.
24:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Just he has all those lines.
24:24
[SPEAKER_02]: You don't want to go to Disneyland.
24:25
[SPEAKER_02]: They have they have another park down here.
24:28
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm being a real pro.
24:29
[SPEAKER_04]: I got no Disney money.
24:30
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
24:31
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
24:32
[SPEAKER_02]: And I said, ain't no way in hell.
24:34
[SPEAKER_02]: My son gonna see me fail.
24:36
[SPEAKER_02]: And so he was the light in me that made me be on live every day.
24:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Maybe show up and go to work.
24:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Uh, I have like a daily sales go.
24:45
[SPEAKER_02]: I have to make if that didn't make.
24:47
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm off.
24:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Hey y'all, who wants a business table, who wants a contract, Tiff, let's get, I am so consistent because my son is going to have that same life he had when I was married.
24:59
[SPEAKER_02]: And then just being consistent, showing up, God has blessed me so much.
25:02
[SPEAKER_02]: I got more than I was married.
25:05
[SPEAKER_02]: And he's living his best life in our neighborhood, when we move there, it may have been two homes, a brand new neighborhood.
25:13
[SPEAKER_02]: After they got built, he has about 10 different families with all boys, his age.
25:18
[SPEAKER_02]: He is the ring leader with electric bike, you know what I mean?
25:23
[SPEAKER_02]: He's the best fisherman in the group, so they go fishing every day after school and they ride their bikes and their scooters, and he's literally having the time of his life.
25:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And so that's nothing but God because I don't have no man.
25:36
[SPEAKER_02]: It's just me, all of the dads in the group have just taken him in.
25:41
[SPEAKER_02]: So when they do the whole football, but it's like, he still has that fatherly of the fatherly figure, although I haven't found my new bull yet.
25:50
[SPEAKER_02]: You know what I'm saying?
25:51
[SPEAKER_02]: So it's like, God God was just feeling in the gap for everything that you need.
25:57
[SPEAKER_02]: And he's to me has transitioned so well.
25:59
[SPEAKER_02]: He's doing good in school.
26:02
[SPEAKER_02]: He knows that side, mom side.
26:04
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't ask him, nothing about his trips.
26:06
[SPEAKER_02]: I know I even got to pretend.
26:07
[SPEAKER_02]: How's everyone, I don't, I don't give a rant.
26:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Nothing, how no one doing, something will ask.
26:13
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't care who how they're doing over there.
26:15
[SPEAKER_02]: I asked about Sissy, his sister, because that was my honest daughter for 12 years.
26:20
[SPEAKER_02]: And then she got ripped from me too, but hey, it is what it is.
26:23
[SPEAKER_02]: But how do you get here, though?
26:25
[SPEAKER_04]: Like, is that your makeup, you know how to just
26:30
[SPEAKER_04]: You know, going about your business and have you been that way throughout your life?
26:34
[SPEAKER_04]: Or did you have to develop this version that you now like?
26:37
[SPEAKER_04]: Oh, let it rest where it is.
26:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I think being in this is for so long.
26:41
[SPEAKER_02]: You guys, you gotta just let it go.
26:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Like sometimes you gotta just let things go where they go.
26:45
[SPEAKER_02]: So it is what it is.
26:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Because if I keep trying to fix things, I realize in my marriage, I was trying to hold all these pieces together.
26:54
[SPEAKER_02]: And that, sometimes you're holding on to the same thing that's killing you.
26:57
[SPEAKER_02]: So for my sanity, let's stop taking from me in Africa.
27:01
[SPEAKER_02]: If you're gonna take my bonus daughter, I can't, I mean, I can't fight for her.
27:05
[SPEAKER_02]: I ain't her real mama.
27:10
[SPEAKER_04]: So it's joy controlling, does she have to be in control?
27:16
[SPEAKER_04]: You don't have to be.
27:18
[SPEAKER_02]: I would like to not be in control.
27:20
[SPEAKER_04]: Okay, now let's get to it then.
27:21
[SPEAKER_04]: So what type of man would joy hunt?
27:24
[SPEAKER_04]: Because the last list you made, he checked out the boxes he would need.
27:29
[SPEAKER_04]: So what type of guy now?
27:31
[SPEAKER_02]: The saying guy, this really be what I say it is.
27:34
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to be on the has character integrity, a provider, an alpha man like a man's man.
27:41
[SPEAKER_02]: And on this thing in age, you know, it's a little different.
27:45
[SPEAKER_04]: It's been the best day since you've been kind of, you know, in this process.
27:50
[SPEAKER_04]: Anybody get close to like, he might be a girl.
27:54
[SPEAKER_02]: There's a guy who's he, he's,
27:57
[SPEAKER_02]: He sparked your interest, he did.
28:01
[SPEAKER_04]: So what part of your heart are still off limits until he does this?
28:06
[SPEAKER_02]: I think that's just time, because in my last relationship, it was everything was so quick.
28:11
[SPEAKER_02]: So let me just, I think time will tell everything.
28:15
[SPEAKER_02]: You don't really see a person's true colors over time.
28:18
[SPEAKER_02]: I got to see you when you mad.
28:19
[SPEAKER_02]: I got to see you when you stressed.
28:21
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to see you when you angry.
28:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Or you're gonna lash out on me.
28:24
[SPEAKER_02]: You're gonna handle yourself.
28:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Or you're gonna put me down.
28:26
[SPEAKER_02]: You're gonna throw up, man.
28:27
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, like what you doing when you upset?
28:29
[SPEAKER_02]: So I want to see you in all your seasons.
28:32
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to see you have some kind of financial issue like a bad deal or something that's going wrong.
28:36
[SPEAKER_02]: How do you handle that stress?
28:37
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to be able to see that.
28:39
[SPEAKER_04]: Good.
28:40
[SPEAKER_04]: So as you kind of trick down this road now, you doing good with your business, I think you understand what type of person you will need.
28:49
[SPEAKER_04]: your palate hasn't changed and the type of man you want.
28:52
[SPEAKER_04]: You just want those type of, I think I hear what you're saying is that you just want those type of attributes in the man.
28:58
[SPEAKER_04]: You think you chose the right attributes, you just chose the wrong man.
29:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Correct.
29:02
[SPEAKER_02]: He didn't have those attributes at all.
29:04
[SPEAKER_04]: Got it.
29:04
[SPEAKER_02]: So do you still practice law?
29:06
[SPEAKER_02]: No, I haven't practiced law since my son was born.
29:07
[SPEAKER_02]: So I was, I practiced law to about 2012 and then I just did full-time entrepreneurship.
29:14
[SPEAKER_02]: I first had 10 salons.
29:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Then I eventually off into the out of industry.
29:18
[SPEAKER_02]: So a dealership, collision shop, rental car, company insurance agency.
29:22
[SPEAKER_02]: So I like to scale in the same industry.
29:25
[SPEAKER_04]: Good.
29:26
[SPEAKER_04]: So full transparency to my audience.
29:30
[SPEAKER_04]: Somebody on my production team may be nine months ago.
29:35
[SPEAKER_04]: Maybe even a year ago, they say, have you ever considered joy, joy hunt?
29:39
[SPEAKER_04]: And I was like, who's joy hunt?
29:41
[SPEAKER_04]: And then they kind of showed me, I was like, oh yeah, I see her face online a lot of times.
29:45
[SPEAKER_04]: We were moving and grooving.
29:47
[SPEAKER_04]: I remember the day we were interviewing Chris Tucker that day and I had a lot going on.
29:51
[SPEAKER_04]: And I was like, oh, okay cool, cool, cool.
29:53
[SPEAKER_04]: Can we talk about it afterwards?
29:55
[SPEAKER_04]: And then I was on my triad meal, and I'm working out.
30:00
[SPEAKER_04]: And I remember that conversation, but I couldn't remember the name.
30:03
[SPEAKER_04]: And I was like, I know our face.
30:05
[SPEAKER_04]: She got a really, you know, you got a very distinct face.
30:07
[SPEAKER_04]: And I was like, I know, okay, I'm looking all out.
30:10
[SPEAKER_04]: What is their name?
30:11
[SPEAKER_04]: And then she shows up, and I told her this offline.
30:16
[SPEAKER_04]: I was going to do my research and then I felt like the Lord said, no, I just want you to hear.
30:21
[SPEAKER_04]: Um, and I don't want to put any like icing on top of it, but more so look, I want you to see what I've done.
30:27
[SPEAKER_04]: And so now I really understand what it is.
30:29
[SPEAKER_04]: When you got to the party by the 13 year old boy, um, you know, I've been an entrepreneur all my life.
30:34
[SPEAKER_04]: When I first got my radio opportunity, which was kind of like a job, you know, independent contractors.
30:39
[SPEAKER_04]: They were like, how many days you want off?
30:41
[SPEAKER_04]: I was like, 40 days, 40 nights.
30:43
[SPEAKER_04]: I don't know.
30:45
[SPEAKER_04]: Jesus, that's 40 days, that's like, you're going to need to look.
30:48
[SPEAKER_04]: So I ended up getting a lawyer.
30:49
[SPEAKER_04]: And then, you know, when I got divorced, I was kind of like you.
30:54
[SPEAKER_04]: I probably just would have stayed on the couch.
30:56
[SPEAKER_04]: But then I looked over and I same my boy and my girl.
31:01
[SPEAKER_04]: and all this stuff was going on online.
31:03
[SPEAKER_04]: I was like, I got to get up from here.
31:05
[SPEAKER_04]: Somehow, some way, I'm have to figure it out.
31:07
[SPEAKER_04]: I can't go preach because you can't be divorced and preaching at the same time because they don't seem to like you there anymore.
31:14
[SPEAKER_04]: And I picked up that camera again and I just started like, all right, we're going to make videos.
31:18
[SPEAKER_04]: We're going to do podcast.
31:19
[SPEAKER_04]: I'm
31:19
[SPEAKER_04]: We're going to do t-shirts.
31:20
[SPEAKER_04]: We're going to do this.
31:21
[SPEAKER_04]: And then God begins to breathe on this thing.
31:23
[SPEAKER_04]: And so to hear a woman having the what I would like to cause, especially when you come from a certain caliber of life, to have to then get it up out the mud, it just, it literally bears witness to God's grace.
31:35
[SPEAKER_04]: You know what I mean?
31:36
[SPEAKER_04]: And I'm just so grateful that you will share your story to the woman who's on the other side of this camera right now, who,
31:42
[SPEAKER_04]: is in that same relationship.
31:44
[SPEAKER_04]: Every time her man gets angry, he's throwing something.
31:47
[SPEAKER_04]: He hasn't necessarily may not have even hit her, but she's really afraid, like she doesn't know when it may be her instead of the dishes.
31:56
[SPEAKER_04]: It may be her instead of the coffee table.
31:59
[SPEAKER_04]: Like, what would your advice be to a woman who may be in a very unsafe situation right now?
32:05
[SPEAKER_02]: I would say leave, the violence never gets better.
32:09
[SPEAKER_02]: So, a lot of times in our toxic relationship, it was really good in the beginning.
32:15
[SPEAKER_02]: And it was really good because the person was love bombing, I giving you their best, like in the first 6, 90 days to get you hooked.
32:23
[SPEAKER_02]: And as things get worse, you keep thinking and we can get back to how things were in the beginning will be good.
32:30
[SPEAKER_02]: But you're never going to get back there because that's not the person.
32:33
[SPEAKER_04]: Right.
32:34
[SPEAKER_02]: And so stop holding on to have a long you've been there.
32:38
[SPEAKER_02]: Like if you're going on, if you're going to wrong direction on a train, you're going to keep going to wrong direction.
32:41
[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to get up and come back and get the right direction.
32:44
[SPEAKER_02]: So I would say leave is not going to get better.
32:46
[SPEAKER_02]: It's only going to get worse.
32:47
[SPEAKER_02]: The violence is only going to get worse.
32:50
[SPEAKER_04]: Yeah.
32:51
[SPEAKER_04]: Indeed.
32:52
[SPEAKER_04]: Listen.
32:52
[SPEAKER_04]: Joy has a new book from Broken to the Bank.
32:56
[SPEAKER_04]: I think we understand what from Broken to the Bank is, if you want to give anything extra on this book, I think we understand what it says, what broke you can actually build you.
33:08
[SPEAKER_04]: 21 laws to break free bounce back and build the life you deserve.
33:12
[SPEAKER_04]: Wrong love, right?
33:16
[SPEAKER_04]: You already know what it is.
33:19
[SPEAKER_04]: Let me just talk to you guys real quick.
33:20
[SPEAKER_04]: So to the lady right now who's listening to me and you're thinking to yourself, oh my God, this is me.
33:25
[SPEAKER_04]: In fact, you may have literally turned the volume down because you didn't want that person to hear or maybe when she talked about her child, you think it to yourself like, how can I make it?
33:36
[SPEAKER_04]: And the truth is, you can trust God and he'll show you how to take the first step.
33:44
[SPEAKER_04]: I think a lot of times when we're wanting to make moves and make transitions, we want to have this huge vision.
33:50
[SPEAKER_04]: But as I'm listening to Joy, her first step was like, I'm getting out of here and I'm going to Orlando.
33:56
[SPEAKER_04]: And then when she made it to Orlando, she got an opportunity to see what was next.
34:00
[SPEAKER_04]: as a person who has been adopted and, you know, had never met anybody in my biological family.
34:06
[SPEAKER_04]: There have been so many times in my life that I wanted God to give me the entire vision or just make it all, make it all make sense.
34:13
[SPEAKER_04]: Like I just wanted all to make sense, but I just want to be very honest with you.
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[SPEAKER_04]: sometime God just makes the first step make sense and then he makes the second step make sense.
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[SPEAKER_04]: I don't know if you guys had the opportunity to see the Michael Jackson video on age in myself now, but he had a song called Billy Jane and he was dancing.
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[SPEAKER_04]: That every time he would stand on one little brick it would light up and he'll go to another brick it would light up and I believe that's a visual what God wants to do until you in your life.
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[SPEAKER_04]: I understand that sometimes the toughest thing to do is to make a decision meaning that I'm going to cut off any other option for me to ever go back Any other option for me to do anything different, but I just want to challenge you in this moment.
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[SPEAKER_04]: Listen to this testimony, may me say you know what
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[SPEAKER_04]: Somebody deserves to know what it looks like on the other side of faith.
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[SPEAKER_04]: And I just believe that that person is you.
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[SPEAKER_04]: So the best thing that you can do in this moment.
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[SPEAKER_04]: And I don't know what that looks like for you because it's going to look like different for everybody.
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[SPEAKER_04]: But I want you to challenge yourself and just say, listen, how much use me?
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[SPEAKER_04]: And I'm going to love myself more.
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[SPEAKER_04]: And I'm going to take my first step.
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[SPEAKER_04]: And I'm going to trust God to do the rest.
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[SPEAKER_04]: Don't forget to love yourself more.