Latest / Candid Coach Conversations / Starting a Business Is a Commitment, Not a Gamble

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Starting a Business Is a Commitment, Not a Gamble · Candid Coach Conversations

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Hello everyone! I'm curious. Have you ever wondered how much it would cost
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or what it would really take to start your own business?
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Welcome to Candid Coach Conversations.
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I'm Kimberly Boyd, founder of Live Life Fully,
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and today I have with me the spectacular Amanda Kaufman.
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Welcome Amanda!
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I've never been introduced as the spectacular Amanda Kaufman,
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but I'm gonna take it. Thank you so much for having me.
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Yes.
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Yes. I'm glad you're here today.
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So yeah, ~ thinking about this whole topic about what does it take and
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how much does it really cost, which cost can mean so many different things.
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But I would
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Totally.
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love for you to share your ideas about what does it really take to start your
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own business and how do you know you're really ready.
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~ man,
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this is such a good conversation because I love helping people
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to determine for themselves the right moment.
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And like what is that moment gonna be for you?
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What is that thing that is on your heart to pursue?
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so here's the thing about business is that there's a cost the whole time.
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So a lot of times people think like,
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I've got to have this Scrooge McDuck pile of money that I'm just bathing in.
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And then when I have all of that capital,
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then I'm gonna be able to just finally start my business and it'll
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be risk-free because actually I could just live off of that pile of money
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for a minute and you know, figure out the business thing along the way.
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And the real experience of business is that it is a trade-off.
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The whole time. Not just in the beginning,
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not just at the end. Like, business is commerce.
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Like if you look at what commerce is,
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it's trading, right? So you're
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Yeah.
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you're gonna be it's going to cost you time,
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money.
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emotional attention and energy,
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right? it's it's going to require commitment.
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And I heard this great quote this week that I think is super ~
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Super useful when you're thinking about starting a business or growing
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a business or finally getting serious about a business.
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You know, there's a lot of people that kind of find themselves accidentally starting
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something, like a hobby kind of a business,
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and then one day they're like,
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Am I am I really doing this thing?
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So the quote was this in our youth,
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we're creating options. And as we grow older,
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we make commitments.
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I love it.
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And I think that's
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so such an interesting thing to think about,
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right? Because when you're in your twenties,
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you don't know. You don't know what you're gonna do with your life.
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And so what do we what do we work on?
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We work on, well, I guess I'll go to school.
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I guess I'll get a degree, maybe.
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I guess I'll I guess I'll go meet some people.
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And so when you're very young,
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it's all about creating options.
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You know, what are all the
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Hmm.
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options? And at some point, you go pro,
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you decide that you're gonna like
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Eliminate some options, and one of the first options we tend to eliminate is like,
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who am I gonna spend my life with?
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Right? We commit to that marriage to that person,
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for example. And what are we saying?
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Like, we're growing up into the commitment that all these other options,
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you know, playing that field, they're those are no longer gonna be what I commit to.
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And that quote about optionality and commitment,
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I actually believe that when people are
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Struggling with getting a business off the ground or really gaining
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a lot of traction, it's usually because they're trying to keep so many options open
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Mm.
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and they're not making the commitments.
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So they're not dedicating the money,
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they're not dedicating the time,
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they're not dedicate, they're not saying
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I'm gonna do this instead of other things.
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So I think that's the real cost of starting it is realizing that
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you are eliminating other possibilities.
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And if you can let go of those other possibilities and say,
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This is my possibility that I'm pursuing,
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I'm going to commit and I'm gonna go all in,
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that's when you start the business.
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And that could be for twenty three cents.
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It doesn't have to be millions of dollars.
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Right. So
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good. And I love that you said
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Right. And it might be interesting.
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Deciding to go all in. And you earlier you had mentioned the hobby because my gosh,
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isn't that so true? People that buy a cricket and they're like,
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I want to buy a cricket and I wanna make cute things,
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and lo and behold, it does become a business,
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and they never even realized it.
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And when I say that too, like I can think of somebody in particular,
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she started out, it was a hobby,
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it has become a business, and yet
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She'll even say like she hasn't reached her fullest potential
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in her business because she has not made that commitment to go all in
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and focus on that. She'll just here and there and do things for friends
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and just charge material fees.
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So anyway, that's what came up for me is
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Hmm. That's a really good point.
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I mean,
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when you're building a business,
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it is trade. Like that's what it is.
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And so
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That is.
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many times we are our ego is very wrapped up in
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Am I gonna gain approval from everybody if I do it this way?
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are people going to judge me if my prices are higher than something some somewhere
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else that they might get something perhaps similar but not the same because
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I put my heart and soul and creativity into it.
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and there's all these questions that tend to come up.
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And and for me when it comes to business,
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I would say my superpower with it is that I did get very emotional with business
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for a long time.
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Right. And I made everything mean something.
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You know, if I was having if I was selling something and how other people felt about
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it, like it I took on all this meaning and I had a really
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big emotional roller coaster with that because I always felt like
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I was disappointing somebody and I was I I I just really wasn't living
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my best life to be honest, because whenever any little thing happened
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in the business, it was you know,
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big drama. And
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Right.
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through coaching.
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personal growth and development,
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deep reflection, and a lot of training.
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I've learned that actually your emotional management is a skill,
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right? And what is happening in
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Yes.
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the business is generally data,
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it's information. And the better you can get at realizing that look,
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value is in the eye of the beholder.
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And so if you find a customer who values what you do,
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they will pay more than your materials.
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They'll pay
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more than what they
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Okay.
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would pay to some stranger.
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you know, doing the the same thing,
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not really, because they don't have the rapport and relationship and connection.
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And it it's it's really like defining that,
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defining the value. And I think one of the hardest things is to
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to develop and cultivate a confidence and conviction in your own value.
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Mm-hmm.
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So regardless
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of what other people's opinions might be about it.
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And so, you know, for me, for my journey,
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it was really starting to like pull apart the meaning or the the ego attack.
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Of business activities and business decisions,
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and to stop operating from a place of guilt or shame or frustration
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or anger and start learn to regulate those things in really much healthier ways
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so that I can make decisions that are good for the business.
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If you're spending all your time and energy on something and you don't
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get paid properly for it, that's a bad business decision because and
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I'm not saying you're a bad person,
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this is the separation, you're not a bad person.
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But if we're looking at a business as like this mathematical thing that you're
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building, it's inputs, it's outputs.
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And if the inputs are way,
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Mm-hmm.
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way, way, way more than the outputs,
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then it means there's a new decision required.
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That's all.
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Yeah.
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That's it. And a lot of times the rationality of that is honestly
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the hardest part of business.
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Yes, it's so interesting, Amanda.
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so many things popped up for me.
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And so when you talk about emotional management as a skill,
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my gosh, yes. And I don't know if this is true for you.
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One thing I think about when it comes to emotional management is
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and thinking about working, operating from that place of guilt or the
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ego getting in the way, but it's this all these thoughts that are in my head
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and I'm like, whoa, I've got to externalize them.
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So either just talking to myself or writing
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about on
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paper in a journal or something but really externalizing it I think does help people
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with that emotional management.
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Then also when I think about starting a business
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I think there's so many businesses that can be started and people don't think
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of them as a business.
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And what I mean by that is I'll just go with writing a book.
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I have several people that I'm coaching right now that have either finished their
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book, it's at the publisher, or it's it's finally launched,
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it's out in the world, and then I have three clients right now that have their wild
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and crazy idea is to write a book.
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And I'm like, this is so amazing.
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And that too is a business. Like writing a book is starting a business.
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Because it's value. It's value
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Yes.
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exchange. It's an input of activity.
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And you do a lot of steps with the book,
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right? Because there's writing the book,
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Yeah.
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but then of course there's the editing process,
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the marketing process, like all these processes that work together
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to bring that value, that idea out of your head and into an audience
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who can then benefit from your organized and thoughtful ideas.
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Yeah.
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But the but there's like a huge process that that goes into that.
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And ~
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Absolutely.
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and I think like the reason we don't think about
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Our book as a business or our our crafting as a business
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is so often I think there's really two things happening.
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Number one, we look at our consumption,
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and in 2026, most people they're shopping at huge corporations.
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They're buying off of Amazon, they're buying from Walmart,
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they have like the they're they're kind of in this homogenized experience
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of business in.
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their day to day consumption and
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Like that's a that's a that's a $20 word.
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What I'm saying is is that we just have a very limited and narrow perspective.
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business is Walmart, business is gas station,
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business is Amazon, business is paying my
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Yes.
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internet bill, it's Netflix. And yes,
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Right.
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those are businesses. And out of all of the millions of businesses that
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are in the United States, those represent like a teeny teeny weeny tiny little
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fraction of them. And what people don't realize.
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Is that actually like Amazon's a beautiful example of this,
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and same with Walmart, and same with Netflix,
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those are platforms, they're a particular
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Mm-hmm.
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type of business, and guess what?
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It's businesses that are propping up and benefiting from those platforms,
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and there's businesses that help those businesses get to the top of
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the ratings on those platforms.
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So, like what people don't realize is that.
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Business is anytime there's a trade that is made.
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That's it. It's anytime a trade is made.
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So I think the second piece, one,
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we have a very narrow vision of business.
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The second piece is we have a very narrow vision of the value we offer.
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We don't stop to consider when I do this favor,
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when I take this 15 minutes or 30 minutes or 45 minutes or an hour or two,
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and I gift it to somebody for no it for nothing asked back except
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for the time together. We don't stop to think about that ripple of what
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are they gonna be able to do because I did that?
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What are they no longer having to deal with because I did that?
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And
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We get kind of that that good feeling of the pat on the back and the smile
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and the high five, but we're not standing in our conviction that this matters,
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that I spent time, whether I got paid for it or not,
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it matters, and it's my discretion whether I want to give it for free or not.
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But I think we just
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Yes.
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tend to diminish it. We don't even see what the ripple is.
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You know?
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Right.
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my gosh, so good. So and thinking about people wondering,
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like, am I really ready? Like,
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do I have what it takes? Like I guess what love
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If you've ever worked a job, you're ready.
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that, yes. If you've ever worked one for five minutes at a job.
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If you got paid
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to babysit or mow a line, like you are that was business.
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You've already done it. Like I think that's the thing that gets in the way too is
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Especially in this country, we really love our bureaucracy.
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You know, we love our forms and our insurance and like our beer you know,
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just all the bureaucratic like stuff.
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And I don't know about you, but that stuff makes me queasy.
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I don't I don't really love it.
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I don't love getting snagged in the details,
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but I mean that's that's the world we live in.
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So I've shared with you on another podcast.
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I used to think
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Okay.
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that in order I'm laughing about it now.
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I used to think that filing my paperwork.
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to start my business was gonna be like an episode of Law and Order.
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So it's like klung klung, right?
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And I'm gonna have to go to court and there's gonna be lawyers and it's gonna
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be expensive. no.
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With my second business, when I started my second business,
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I swear, I absolutely swear to you,
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it was 18 minutes.
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Yes.
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18 minutes
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online. And I didn't even do most of it.
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I just told the people who were doing it for me what I wanted.
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And it cost me, I want to say for this one,
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it was like $250 to form the business and get all the paperwork
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and be totally compliant and like.
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I's dotted, T's crossed, and just you know,
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Yes.
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18 minutes
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and 250 bucks. And the thing is,
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is that you probably spend that on your hair every quarter.
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Or,
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Yeah.
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you know, you're probably spending 250 bucks without even.
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Did you know the average American spends something like $1,117 at Starbucks?
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I could be north or south a little bit per year.
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I knew Starbucks was coming. I d
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yeah, I felt Starbucks coming.
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I I just like, mm, Starbucks is involved here because we really can have
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two hundred fifty dollars in the bank quickly.
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Giving up a little Starbucks. my gosh,
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A lot quicker than you think. Like,
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like, like for most people,
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yes.
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they probably don't even have the time exactly to sit down in a significant block
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of time for the next two weeks.
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If in the same two weeks you gave up your Starbucks,
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you canceled a few of your streaming subscriptions,
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that's the cost of business. The cost of business is deciding
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So
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that
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It's important that I do this.
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So therefore, I'm going to take from things that are less important to
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me in this season, and I'm going to give it into the business on the understanding,
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you know, I kind of think of it like I have a contract with my business,
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an agreement with my business.
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It's like, hey, hey, business,
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hey, I'm gonna give you this $250 to form up,
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and I'm expecting some money out of this.
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And so I
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Right.
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have to do things and activities,
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of course, beyond filing the LLC.
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I need to do activities that pull that business in.
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And that's exactly what I did.
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Right? So I think a lot of times people hold their business at either their business
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idea or even the business they started at arm's length.
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And they're like, I'm scared of the numbers.
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I'm scared of the work.
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I'm scared of the patience I'm gonna have to have before something's gonna actually
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come through. And I'm like, think of a business as if it was a person.
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If you were to have a conversation with it,
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what would be the agreement that you would have with each other so that it's healthy
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and you're healthy?
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Absolutely. Yes.
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Yeah.
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I think another fear that pops up,
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at least it had for me in the past,
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is gosh, what if I do this and it doesn't work out?
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Or that was a big thing. What
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Yeah.
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if nobody is interested? And so like you said,
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I had a conversation with myself and with my business about
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What are the potential things that could get in the way to make it not work?
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And how can I frontload the business or front-load myself to ensure that that's
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not going to be the case?
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I love this and I want to add to it because it's so good.
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Yes, that that thought that like what if it doesn't work?
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I would say is probably the most sabotaging thought that I hear among people
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who are like, I think about it,
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I want it, you know, or they've been in business for a while and they're like,
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How come it's not growing? How come it's
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Right.
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because here's the here's an uncomfortable truth about business
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is usually what happens is you get started and your immediate warm network,
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they're gonna be like, they're gonna feel strongly about it.
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And some people are gonna feel strongly like negatively,
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and that's what we're all worried about.
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About, but you know what? There's gonna be some people who feel
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the exact opposite way, and they're gonna be supportive.
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And those supportive people, they're either gonna become customers
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or they're gonna bring you business and they're gonna be like,
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Good for you, you underdog, right?
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Like, go for it! And you get this under underdog boost that happens when
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you very first start a business,
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and then that network is tapped.
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Yeah.
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So there's this initial burst of success that is pretty typical of a new business.
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And if you look at the statistics around whether a business succeeds or not,
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you'll notice that a lot of them are quoted on like a three-year timeline
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or a five-year timeline.
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So what's the reason? Like, how come you would be starting strong for a year
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or two and then in year three we're done or year five we're done statistically?
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Well, it's because a real like long-term business has processes that work
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together to keep meeting new people.
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So you
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Mm.
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have stronger marketing, you have branding,
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positioning, you start building reputation.
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In the beginning of your business,
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you don't need that because you already have a reputation.
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But at some stage, a business typically will need to expand its its network,
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its its impact on people, and those require skills.
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And that those additional skills are very confronting for a business owner,
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right? Because they're like, wait,
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I already figured it out, and it's like,
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yeah, but and to keep playing,
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we need to keep growing. And so business is not something that it's like
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you launch it and then you arrive,
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and then it's happily ever after.
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Those are disney.
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movies which just in case we don't know those are not real.
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Yeah.
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And and business building on its own is a is a is a incredible skill set.
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It's a very transferable skill set to your kids,
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to people around you, and it's it's super beneficial.
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So all of that to say, the fear it won't work out.
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I hear it the most with people who have a lot of sunk cost,
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right? I had initial success or I spent XYZ number of dollars on making this thing
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work. I took the leap. What the heck?
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You know, it's usually really quickly followed with what is going
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on in frustration and
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Yes.
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this fear of doing something new.
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Yeah, so fear not. the the number one thing when you're on the other side
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of that hump.
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Adopt a testing mindset.
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Yes. Tell what you mean by that.
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Yes, yes, yes.
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Yes. So
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you have, and whether you're starting fresh or whether you're in that kind
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of bump slump thing, I'm gonna call it that the bump slump because you
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got a bump and then a slump. So whether you're starting and you're getting over that
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initial bump or you're now in the slump after the bump,
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the testing mindset is essentially this.
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If you were to take a piece of paper and just put a line down the middle of it,
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you could write all the things you know for sure.
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And you can write all the things you sure don't know.
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You don't know, right? You don't know.
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It's like I don't I've got this new offer.
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I know that I've sold things in the past.
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I know that I've had a job before.
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I know that I have this experience.
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I know what my intentions are.
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That's a really, really important thing because
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Huge.
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other people won't understand your intentions all the time.
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And they'll have stories they tell themselves about what other people's intentions
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are. That has nothing to do with you.
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You know what your intentions are.
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So you know all these things. And when it comes to growing.
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The scary part is you don't know.
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You don't know that 20 hours of effort is going to result in $20,000.
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You don't know that starting that social media channel is going to bring
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you any more conversations or business.
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You don't know if the market is gonna love that product or not.
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So building a testing mindset is essentially getting clear and aware
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of what don't you yet know.
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And then out of all the things you don't know,
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here's the big relief. Most of it doesn't even matter.
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Exactly.
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Most of it doesn't even matter,
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right? Because let's just and this is why when I'm coaching people,
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I really, really like to know your goal.
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What is your goal? Is your goal to be at $10,000 a month?
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Is your goal to finally tell your spouse that you're starting a business?
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Like, what is your goal?
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Mm-hmm.
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Because if your goal is to make,
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let's say, $10,000 a month, it doesn't really matter what your spouse
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has to say about it.
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And I know that sounds really rude,
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I guess, but not really. If the goal is
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Right.
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like, I'm gonna do this, I'm changing my career.
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It's like you might have another goal.
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So I call these invisible goals.
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You might have another goal of I want my husband to love every single thing that
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I do. Like, all right, well, let's check in on that.
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Like, how true is that? Really?
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Really.
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And what's
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Right.
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maybe the goal behind the goal?
21:26
Maybe the goal behind the goal is I want to have a really great marriage.
21:29
Awesome. So let's talk about what that looks like.
21:32
Does that mean that he's never disturbed by your need to pursue a goal?
21:36
Because that doesn't sound
21:37
Yes.
21:38
like a happy marriage. That sounds like walking on eggshells.
21:41
A happy marriage might be.
21:43
I want to be able to tell him the reason these dreams are very important to me.
21:48
And I want him to receive that.
21:50
Cool. So there's probably a skill there to develop more influence
21:54
in your relationship. And you can work both these goals at the same time.
21:58
You don't have to like go be successful at business first and then learn
22:01
how to have great conversations in a thriving marriage with your hubby.
22:04
You can do it all at the time.
22:05
Right.
22:05
But you gotta know your goal.
22:07
Yes.
22:08
So made up what I've picked up today and I've made some notes is that
22:11
how does somebody know they're ready if they've had a job before of any kind?
22:16
Incredible
22:16
Yeah, if you've ever added
22:17
value in in any kind and ever been paid for it ever.
22:20
Picking up poop, dog poop. If you're a dog poop picker upper,
22:24
okay, then you're ready.
22:25
Yep. Wiping baby butts. Whatever.
22:27
Then you're ready. Yep.
22:28
Babysitting, whatever it is. Okay,
22:30
then you're ready.
22:31
The other thing I made note of is know your intentions.
22:34
Forget about what other people are gonna say or think or no.
22:40
Be clear about your own intentions.
22:42
I think it was Brene Brown who said,
22:45
talking about other people's opinions,
22:47
like, of course, they're none of your business.
22:49
And the people who truly matter,
22:51
like, matter, matter, matter.
22:52
A one-inch square, and I'm looking around my desk.
22:54
Like, do I have those stickers?
22:55
Because I keep one-inch stickers for the times that I am working on something,
22:59
and I'm like, ~ what are people gonna say?
23:02
I get my one-inch square out, a new sticker.
23:05
Okay, when it comes to this project,
23:07
who really matters? And if their names don't fit in that one-inch square,
23:12
they don't get a say in my head,
23:14
they don't get a say in my heart.
23:16
And I think I learned that from Brene Brown was the one-inch square.
23:18
So go get some one-inch stickers.
23:20
First.
23:22
I
23:22
love that idea. And you know, I think the thing when I was starting my business,
23:27
I mean, it wasn't an accident that I brought up the husband example,
23:30
but I do hear it a lot from other people too,
23:32
is like we have
23:33
Sure.
23:33
people that are important in our lives,
23:35
but not every single goal requires alignment with every single person
23:41
and their goals in your life. Like that is so exhausting to try
23:45
to people please like that. That is people pleasing.
23:49
It is.
23:49
And like what I had to learn with my husband is I'm like,
23:52
he is on my one inch square for so many things.
23:55
Like he's on my one inch square about raising the kids,
23:59
he's on my one inch square around their schooling,
24:02
he's on my one inch square around how we eat in our family and the home operations.
24:06
Like there's things that like for sure,
24:09
his like he occupies the whole square,
24:11
right? For certain things.
24:11
Yeah.
24:12
But stuff like how I get my hair done,
24:14
he's not on the square.
24:16
Right.
24:16
It's nice when
24:17
I get a compliment, but if he doesn't like my haircut,
24:19
that's a him problem. You know,
24:21
he's not on the square, right?
24:22
And by the way, he loves my haircut right now.
24:24
It's just an example.
24:25
Right no,
24:25
no, I I totally get it because it's so true.
24:28
And
24:28
I mean, my kids are all adults now,
24:30
and so Andrew's name, his name is on my square a lot of the time
24:34
and then other times not. And same with the kids,
24:37
so many things, 'cause then I think about legacy and and what there's
24:42
a trickle down or a trickle out to the kids.
24:44
And there's some decisions they could care less about.
24:46
And so like I wouldn't even ask them.
24:48
So no, they're not going to my square.
24:50
Here's another piece that I have learned.
24:52
I love the one-inch square because it really
24:54
did help me get
24:54
Of my head about a lot of different things or goals or avenues that
24:59
I was interested in. ~
25:00
getting the squares.
25:01
I think that's such a great visual.
25:02
Because it changes your s you can't always have the same square.
25:06
Now that's that's gross. But one thing I did learn to teach myself is
25:09
the first name that goes in that square,
25:12
dang it, is my own. And I don't write me,
25:15
I write Kimberly Boyd. That takes up a lot of letters
25:19
I love that. I love that.
25:21
and a lot of space. So I start with my name.
25:24
So knowing my intentions. So, okay,
25:26
if you've had a job before, you're ready to start your own business.
25:29
Know your intentions, know where your heart is,
25:32
have a testing mindset, and remember,
25:35
like know in advance and remind yourself that this is trade.
25:39
It having business, it is a trade.
25:41
No matter what it is, it is a trade.
25:43
Yeah, absolutely.
25:44
And like the the testing mindset,
25:46
the reason that's so important is because a lot of a lot of entrepreneurs,
25:50
especially online that I work with,
25:52
they were taught to do these huge launches and like big insane leaps that
25:58
were honestly like more than the risk that they were willing to really take.
26:03
So then if it didn't work out,
26:05
they're like, ~ no, catastrophic thinking,
26:07
hello.
26:08
Right.
26:09
And so the testing mindset, I'll add to that,
26:11
not you don't have to test everything you don't know.
26:13
No.
26:14
Identifying what you do need to test,
26:16
and there's a cost to the test.
26:18
So choosing tests and knowing I am risking this,
26:23
I'm risking my time, I'm risking my money,
26:25
I'm risking my emotions with this test,
26:28
but I'm deciding in advance that
26:31
it's worth
26:31
Yes.
26:31
knowing that unknown thing, and I'm gonna keep testing.
26:37
So right sizing the tests into your risk tolerance.
26:41
So that
26:41
Mm.
26:42
it's like, okay, I was willing to put one or two hundred bucks behind this idea
26:47
and then it didn't work out, okay.
26:49
Can you be mad that you didn't make $20,000 from your $200 test?
26:54
No, it's not a reasonable trade.
26:56
However, if if what you want is like a skill like making $20,000 over
27:00
and over and over again, perhaps you're going to have to test more than $200
27:05
at a time, but instead of like putting all your chips on black,
27:09
which is
27:09
What most people do identifying what is that smaller thing that
27:14
I can actually tolerate that is gonna get me closer to the goal because
27:18
I'm gonna get the information I'm missing.
27:20
Yeah. Right sized. Yeah.
27:20
Absolutely. So good.
27:26
So good. I love that you came on today and I love this conversation.
27:30
Me too. This is fun. There were some things that came out I haven't said before
27:34
online, so I'm excited to see the episode come out.
27:37
Yeah, so good. Well thank you,
27:40
Amanda, and I hope that you'll join us again soon.
27:43
and for everybody I hope you remember to live life fully.
27:46
And Amanda, do you have any parting words for our audience today?
27:50
Do
27:51
what matters to your heart. You know,
27:53
that one inch square thing, like that is some that's a writer-downer for sure.
27:57
Like really, if building a business is right for you,
28:00
do it. If staying in the job or the situation that you're in right now
28:04
is best for you because you want to focus on other things,
28:07
stop apologizing that you're not doing the business.
28:10
Do what matters for you right now.
28:12
Full permission. Granted, not that you ever needed it from me.
28:15
You already had it.
28:17
Right. Love it. So good.
28:19
Yeah.
28:20
Well, thank you so much, everybody.
28:22
Thank you for joining today and we look forward to talking with everyone again
28:26
on Candid Coach Conversations.
28:28
Enjoy your day.