Latest / Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily / The Fine Print by Lauren Asher - Just Let Us into Dreamland Damn It!

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The Fine Print by Lauren Asher - Just Let Us into Dreamland Damn It! · Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily

• 0:00
  Hi friends, you're listening to Lose the Plot with Carla and
• 0:02
  Emily. In this episode we're reading
• 0:05
  the fine print by Lauren Asher. We are talking about the entire
• 0:09
  book, so warning, there will be spoilers.
• 0:25
  I'm Carla, and you represent everything I dislike in someone.
• 0:30
  I'm Emily. And why does he talk like he was
• 0:32
  born drinking breast milk out of a porcelain teacup?
• 0:35
  And even weirder, why do I? Enjoy it.
• 0:39
  Before we dive into this juicy episode, we have a tiny favour
• 0:42
  to ask. If you've enjoyed our previous
• 0:44
  episodes and want us to continue creating content, take a moment
• 0:47
  right now. Click over to our.
• 0:49
  Profile and leave us a five star review on whichever platform
• 0:52
  you're using. Share with a friend if you know
• 0:55
  they love smart. Thank you for supporting us
• 1:00
  trigger warnings from the author's website, death of a
• 1:04
  parent, off page, depression, suicidal thoughts, parental
• 1:09
  abuse, and discussions about terminal illness, cancer
• 1:13
  straight off the bat, that is the most depressing list of
• 1:16
  trigger warnings I've ever read in my life.
• 1:18
  Yeah. We're not in Fantasyland
• 1:21
  anymore. Oh, no, we're not.
• 1:22
  We're not talking about. We're not in dreamland.
• 1:24
  Vampires. No.
• 1:25
  We're not even in Dreamland. No, because I'm a complainy
• 1:29
  bitch that I'm going to just start off our podcast.
• 1:31
  Through and through. Whiny from start to finish, we
• 1:34
  are talking about a man who inherited essentially
• 1:38
  Disneyland. A man.
• 1:40
  A man. And we spend a grand total of 5
• 1:44
  minutes in a fucking line for a ride.
• 1:46
  Where is the fireworks? Where is the castle?
• 1:48
  Where is the theme park? Where is the magic?
• 1:50
  Where is the Imaginatorium lab in the?
• 1:53
  Extended Epilogue. We.
• 1:56
  Literally spend every fucking setting in a boring office.
• 2:00
  I know why. Even use that setting.
• 2:03
  Just say he's an accountant. You know what?
• 2:05
  Would have been the cutest thing this man could have ever done.
• 2:09
  She loves dreamland. It's her life.
• 2:11
  It's her family's life. Why didn't he do like a closed
• 2:14
  night? Literally.
• 2:16
  Little Starlight, Little dreamland, Easy night.
• 2:20
  Date with her. It's the only thing that makes
• 2:21
  sense for this funky book. We got a man walking through
• 2:25
  with indigestion. And he.
• 2:27
  Used his fast pass and she was like how dare he who?
• 2:31
  Cares. I can afford a fast pass, fast
• 2:35
  pass. Is his face card.
• 2:38
  He just walked in there with his license, flicking it.
• 2:41
  Read the last name. If they don't even know you're
• 2:44
  the CEO, what's the point of even being the CEO?
• 2:47
  Do you think Elon Musk walks into Tesla and they've got to
• 2:51
  sit there going and wait for him to pull out his ID?
• 2:55
  To be fair, Elon Musk looks like a foot so probably.
• 2:59
  The foot over waters back. What do we do anyway?
• 3:04
  Sorry, I had to get that out of the way settings.
• 3:06
  Terrible, terrible settings. My boyfriend picked this book
• 3:10
  out because I was just flipping through our potentials and he's
• 3:13
  like the one with the castle on it.
• 3:14
  Looks good, bitch. He was wrong.
• 3:16
  But it didn't even look like a castle to me.
• 3:18
  I thought it was a blueprint. So did I actually.
• 3:21
  I was. Like, how did we get Castle?
• 3:24
  OK, four. I've seen this book four months
• 3:27
  and I thought the same thing. I thought it was going to be a
• 3:29
  blueprint. I thought it was going to be a
• 3:31
  man checked. Yes.
• 3:33
  I also thought the same thing. And I also thought when it's
• 3:36
  called the fine print, I thought they were going to get into a
• 3:38
  contractual relationship. Hello.
• 3:41
  Yeah, that. Yeah.
• 3:42
  Hello. Hello.
• 3:44
  The only thing that was. When the boyfriend gets.
• 3:47
  Seven. You don't.
• 3:48
  I know. But the only thing that was a
• 3:50
  contract was her boring, normal job contract.
• 3:53
  I mean, in the fine print it did say that she could not quit
• 3:56
  without an interview, and I feel like that's kidnapping.
• 3:59
  I feel like usually they don't want you to interview on the way
• 4:02
  out. They're like just fucking leave
• 4:03
  the. Man was so pussy deep with that
• 4:06
  girl. OK, we're going way too deep.
• 4:09
  Sorry, I. Like hold off on the penetration
• 4:13
  real quick. I feel like the energy, the
• 4:16
  energy drink just hit really hard and I was like, let's.
• 4:19
  Go sorry, I just went on attention with the settings, but
• 4:22
  that is my biggest critique. In this book you had a whole
• 4:25
  thing you could create. You've got.
• 4:27
  A theme park at the tippies of your fingertippies like you're
• 4:30
  writing this book. They did one ride twice.
• 4:33
  Another complaint. You know this is towards the end
• 4:35
  of the book. His main focus was this very
• 4:38
  thing. When he never even walked
• 4:40
  through the park. He was like, I spent all this
• 4:42
  time talking to my employees. I was like, you never walked in
• 4:47
  the park. You never.
• 4:49
  You were always as Rs. Des day and night, day and
• 4:53
  night. I swear to God he was watching
• 4:55
  her on the cameras on exactly, exactly back.
• 4:59
  To the very beginning, where we always start with our main
• 5:02
  female character. No, we started with our main
• 5:05
  male character. Either one.
• 5:06
  It gave me the ick, That's why I.
• 5:08
  I mean, usually we talk about the female one first.
• 5:11
  But it's fine. It's fine.
• 5:12
  We are. Introduced to Rowan, Yes, and of
• 5:14
  course he's a quote UN quote ruthless businessman.
• 5:18
  But why? He's such a ruthless
• 5:20
  businessman. But why is the first couple of
• 5:22
  sentence talking about how he jumped into his mummy's grave?
• 5:25
  Because that's me. Stop.
• 5:29
  Stop it. He's like the last time I was at
• 5:31
  a few year old, I jumped in my mummy's grave.
• 5:34
  How? Old, was he?
• 5:35
  I don't know, doesn't matter. Probably.
• 5:38
  Probably. Probably.
• 5:39
  Bit of context. Bit of If he's 18, that's weird.
• 5:42
  If he's five, that's adorable for the.
• 5:44
  Context that I'm speaking in. We're gonna pretend he's not a
• 5:47
  child because it would be really sad for me to.
• 5:49
  Bitch about a child. Just bitch about him.
• 5:51
  It's fine. He even tells us he has the
• 5:53
  emotional range of a rock first page.
• 5:57
  He knows. Who he is.
• 5:59
  OK, I mean self aware king. His name is Rowan.
• 6:03
  Yes, this is our second Rowan this year.
• 6:05
  Well, wait, Butcher and Blackbird, That was Rowan.
• 6:07
  That was last year. But it's never, ever Rowan White
• 6:10
  thorn. Who's that?
• 6:13
  Throne of glass colour. Throw in a glass.
• 6:14
  Oh, sorry, I don't know anybody. I know we're getting there.
• 6:18
  It's fine. Every day we'll get slightly
• 6:21
  closer to. You today we're getting closer
• 6:24
  to ACATAR. Just every day bro.
• 6:28
  If I'm 95 and we're in bed, Charlie and the Chocolate
• 6:32
  Factory style. Our feet are touching and then
• 6:33
  you got to standing the Alcatel with your shaky hand and I'm
• 6:36
  like and I just simply pass away.
• 6:37
  It would be it. I'd be like throwing a glass at
• 6:40
  1st and then Acatar we like oh OK.
• 6:43
  And then I touch it. And then you just die, dude.
• 6:48
  That's the only way I want to. Go.
• 6:49
  OK, it's fine. I'm fine with it.
• 6:52
  You know, by that time, global warming will be so bad that we
• 6:54
  won't be honest, we won't. Even make it to 95.
• 6:57
  We won't even have a blankie. We'll just be like cold pool of
• 7:01
  water trying not to die well. That took a really dramatic turn
• 7:07
  left. Oh, to swing back right.
• 7:11
  We're back at rowing. Yeah, we're back at rowing.
• 7:13
  Look, I find our ramblings more exciting than talking about a
• 7:16
  man with the emotional range of a rock.
• 7:18
  But he knows and that's. A point?
• 7:20
  Does he get points for that? Though no, he doesn't.
• 7:23
  One point to Gryffindor. For cycle.
• 7:25
  Madness. But he's like, I'm as tall as an
• 7:30
  NBA player with the emotional range of a rock.
• 7:32
  Store. And the face of a foot of.
• 7:38
  How tall is this man? Tall.
• 7:40
  I didn't know He was like 7 foot tall.
• 7:43
  Even more reason to take him to dreamland.
• 7:45
  You can't get lost. He's not.
• 7:47
  Allowed to go on the rides, girl, he's too.
• 7:49
  Fucking. Tall.
• 7:51
  He's stuck in his knees, in like under his chin.
• 7:55
  They made on a roller coaster at some point.
• 7:57
  Could you imagine? I hope he hits.
• 8:00
  His head a lot of like low flying signs they have on the
• 8:02
  right. It would make more sense to how
• 8:05
  he acts in this entire book. Shit any who straight.
• 8:09
  Away. The book had very strong ROM com
• 8:12
  vibes and I wasn't expecting that at the start.
• 8:16
  I was kind of like, OK, this is a bit different.
• 8:19
  I was expecting straight up sex contract.
• 8:22
  You know how things like praise, they jump straight in with the
• 8:24
  sex contract and you're just almost like, uh huh, That's what
• 8:27
  I was expecting from the cover. I.
• 8:29
  Feel like this is our own fault for going in blind.
• 8:32
  I mean, it's cool. The billionaire.
• 8:35
  Yeah, the Dreamland Billionaire series.
• 8:37
  Yeah, so I we should have went straight to Disneyland.
• 8:40
  But Dreamland could be anything. It could be a sex club.
• 8:43
  Like what's Mccools It? I'd be down for that reading
• 8:46
  about it. At the start they're introducing
• 8:50
  what the latest meetings and everything has been about.
• 8:52
  Yeah, all the boring shit. All the boring shit.
• 8:54
  I'm assuming he works in the company and to get his 18% of
• 8:59
  the company he needs to do this letter shit.
• 9:03
  Yeah, him and his brothers, the other ones have it easy.
• 9:06
  Find a wife. You and I both know that Declan
• 9:09
  is gonna marry Iris in the next book.
• 9:11
  That's. That's.
• 9:13
  That's that's the clearest thing I've ever read in my life.
• 9:16
  What a. Lame reason to get your
• 9:18
  percentage? What is that?
• 9:20
  To continue the family name. Is it family line?
• 9:24
  Yeah, I. Can't We're about ending family
• 9:27
  lines on this podcast. Honestly.
• 9:29
  Just end them. All end them all.
• 9:31
  I don't wanna hear it. I don't.
• 9:33
  Wanna do this pain? Should not exist.
• 9:36
  I don't wanna do this. I don't wanna breathe.
• 9:39
  Fucking there's no continuing of Carla.
• 9:42
  'S life? No, it's.
• 9:42
  Over. It's over.
• 9:44
  It's done with her. The second I touched the tone of
• 9:47
  glass, it's over. So just a casual $10 billion
• 9:53
  budget for this new ride coming up.
• 9:54
  I was like, what? He's OK $10 billion and he's
• 9:59
  working towards getting 25 billion.
• 10:02
  Just take your 10 billion and disappear.
• 10:04
  Well, the 10 billion was making the new ride, yeah.
• 10:07
  So I guess it's in the budget of Dreamland.
• 10:09
  Whereas his shares were like the percentage of his ownership.
• 10:14
  And he's just talking about it like Schmidt, he doesn't
• 10:16
  actually care about the ride. He's not even an Imagineer.
• 10:20
  No. I watched a documentary about
• 10:22
  the Disneyland Imagineers and they actually give a fuck.
• 10:26
  I mean, well, at least at least that's nailed on the head in
• 10:29
  this book. Because every single person that
• 10:31
  works at Dreamland is obsessed with Dreamland.
• 10:33
  Yeah, true. Which is weird.
• 10:35
  Not a life I could live. I could.
• 10:37
  I could be that weird Disney adult.
• 10:39
  Could you? No.
• 10:40
  Could you imagine? Being obsessed with working at
• 10:43
  Woolworths. You were.
• 10:47
  Or it's like a huge corporation. Just any.
• 10:51
  I would because. It's a creative.
• 10:53
  Field. Anyway, he's just does not care,
• 10:55
  Not passionate about the job, kind of hates the place low key.
• 10:58
  He really does. He really does because his dad
• 11:01
  is an abusive POS womp womp womp.
• 11:05
  And so when his granddad died, who was the Walt Disney, let's
• 11:09
  say? Yes.
• 11:10
  He sort of doesn't care about the Kingland anymore, so his
• 11:13
  only good memories was with his granddad.
• 11:16
  Yes. So sad.
• 11:19
  Zara is the typical sunshine to Rowan's grumpy straight up.
• 11:24
  Oh 100% How did they? Even meet I fucking forget it
• 11:27
  was so non event. Yeah, So they were having like,
• 11:30
  this big staff meeting in an auditorium.
• 11:34
  Do you remember now? Yeah, but the worst, most boring
• 11:37
  meet cue in the world. Yeah, it's not even a meet cue.
• 11:40
  She was running late and she brushed.
• 11:43
  His Dick on her hand, right like.
• 11:45
  Yeah, she slipped over his legs because apparently out of the
• 11:48
  entire even though he sat in the back and no one wanted to sit
• 11:52
  with him, the only seat that was left was next to him.
• 11:56
  Stop it and. The electricity that shoots
• 12:00
  right to his crotch. Apparently, yeah, it must have
• 12:02
  been crackling. It was crackling, sizzling.
• 12:04
  Even. Randy in front of him was
• 12:07
  perplexed. The first thing he does is
• 12:14
  immediately check her out way too much.
• 12:18
  She's like, I'm clenching fists for this bitch.
• 12:20
  Yeah, And then she falls on him and then she's talking through
• 12:26
  the meeting because the guy in front of her is a big grump
• 12:29
  grump and she has to bribe him with cakes.
• 12:33
  That's how they met. If he's in the back row and
• 12:37
  Randy's in front of him and the only other person said go to
• 12:40
  sleep with Randy, what are you doing?
• 12:43
  All I remember was the weird Dick brushing and I was like oh
• 12:45
  why is he getting a stiffy? He was getting us like he.
• 12:49
  Every. Single time he was getting a
• 12:51
  stiffy and he was whiffing her. He was sniffing right up in her
• 12:54
  perfume and he was like, this is the most amazing thing ever.
• 12:58
  So immediately the start of them getting together is purely
• 13:02
  because he wants his part of business.
• 13:05
  So he wants the creators to have fast track fucking ideas like no
• 13:09
  tomorrow. And she writes a proposal, but
• 13:12
  she's drunk and she rips into their biggest money making ride,
• 13:17
  which she in fact designed technically by her.
• 13:20
  She's. Ripping her own designer new
• 13:21
  asshole. She's ripping her own designer
• 13:23
  new asshole because her ex stole it, but she gets hired purely on
• 13:28
  that alone. But not only that, he contacts
• 13:31
  her and asks her to come to a meeting on a fucking Saturday
• 13:35
  morning and she's like, I'm getting fired.
• 13:37
  She's. Shitting herself.
• 13:39
  She's shitting a brick. She's pissing, shitting, sliding
• 13:42
  down the wall. And then he calls her in there.
• 13:44
  Then this is first thing on a Sunday morning.
• 13:46
  Like, have a life, Yeah. Have a life.
• 13:48
  He just says this is gonna be your new job.
• 13:50
  Now he doesn't Imagineer and it's only a 10K extra increase.
• 13:56
  That's not much. Considering the hours worked,
• 14:00
  she was gypped. And wasn't she doing hair in the
• 14:03
  Princess Palace in the jiggy? She was wearing hair in the
• 14:05
  Princess Palace and she went to a creator's where she's doing.
• 14:10
  Corporate. She moved from a hairdressing
• 14:12
  job to corporate to corporate full time over time and she only
• 14:16
  got 10K extra. Something wrong.
• 14:19
  She. Was not only working 8 hours,
• 14:21
  but there was a point where they were working 12 hour days and he
• 14:24
  was not boosting their pay because he.
• 14:27
  You don't reward idiots as something, he said.
• 14:29
  I'm like. If you'd rely on these idiots
• 14:32
  for all your ideas, why aren't you making up the ideas?
• 14:34
  Exactly my friend, it is not their fault.
• 14:38
  Fair Work needs to look into this dreamland place.
• 14:40
  This is just. The fact that he didn't even
• 14:42
  know the place had snow until halfway through the book.
• 14:46
  Disgusting. Like, does he know a single
• 14:48
  thing? Sorry.
• 14:50
  Relevant. That is like he can control the
• 14:52
  weather. Like shit?
• 14:55
  No. Yeah, he doesn't know shit.
• 14:57
  About Dick? No, no.
• 15:00
  He undercut her on this. Contract, he undercut.
• 15:02
  Her And then? Refused to let her quit.
• 15:06
  She was like, I don't want it. And he was like, you don't have
• 15:08
  a choice. Also, you're asking someone to
• 15:10
  come in on their day off. Was that the meeting where they
• 15:14
  pretty much curse? No, it was not right.
• 15:17
  It was like a week after. Still, it's practically The ink
• 15:19
  is still fresh on her signature for the new contract she barely
• 15:22
  wanted. When they first kissed, it was
• 15:25
  in the first presentation where she calls him out for being a
• 15:28
  fucking idiot. This man, she calls him an
• 15:31
  asshole and he's pinning her with his Dick.
• 15:34
  Yeah. Because he loves the no.
• 15:37
  She's the first woman who said no to him.
• 15:39
  Psychopath. He's like, I must have her.
• 15:41
  Yeah. You know what I don't
• 15:43
  understand? They kind of hinted at this at
• 15:45
  the beginning. If Zara was so close to the Walt
• 15:48
  Disney granddad, I forget his name.
• 15:51
  Brian. Yes, something stood with AB.
• 15:53
  Why wasn't she already part of the creative program?
• 15:56
  If he knew she was so brilliant in all this shit, why is she
• 15:59
  doing hair? Why is she doing hair?
• 16:02
  And why did they have that weird connection and it's never
• 16:04
  properly mentioned? And it's only a month long
• 16:07
  connection. She acts.
• 16:08
  Like she's been in his pocket for a year.
• 16:11
  She literally acts like she was on his deathbed.
• 16:15
  But she could have been for Rowan knows true like, he
• 16:18
  doesn't know shit. They could be related.
• 16:20
  He she could be the bastard child of this Walt Disney guy.
• 16:23
  No, I was, like, waiting for that twist.
• 16:26
  I was like you guys probably should stop making out.
• 16:29
  Someone needs to sort out. You guys are this is the
• 16:32
  granddaughters. That's what I was gearing up
• 16:35
  for. I'm like, this is going to take
• 16:36
  a hard life. I just don't get it.
• 16:40
  It's like, why is she not part of the creative program if the
• 16:42
  granddad thinks she's so amazing he.
• 16:44
  Written her her letter that the job was there waiting for her.
• 16:48
  So the idea was there. Yeah, but you know who.
• 16:52
  Cares. Who cares?
• 16:55
  About Zara's pay, her life. It doesn't matter.
• 16:59
  Every female job is essentially a hobby.
• 17:02
  Duh, duh, duh. Don't you know that we just put
• 17:07
  on our little work clothes and like, put on our little work
• 17:10
  makeup and just toddle off to like, out, quote, UN quote Jobs
• 17:13
  we could do for fun? Duh.
• 17:16
  That's to meet our husbands. Hello.
• 17:19
  Go on, meet a no man. You don't know you'd.
• 17:24
  Be really weird if you. Were go on.
• 17:27
  Me too. Oh yes, now let's just gagging
• 17:34
  at our own inside jokes. Still want to understand?
• 17:40
  Her first day of this corporate job comes up.
• 17:43
  He's trying to be real serious on her first day.
• 17:46
  He's fucking terrible at it. But he.
• 17:48
  She never stops. Like throwing her head back and
• 17:50
  laughing over dramatically like, girl, turn it down a bit.
• 17:53
  Are you on uppers? Are you hey.
• 17:59
  What is she on though? This this poor man's confused.
• 18:01
  He's like full serious and she's just cackling.
• 18:04
  He's the one who planted it on her, right?
• 18:07
  Yeah, he went for that kiss. Yes, in that workplace after
• 18:13
  that presentation. He he went for a podium and.
• 18:16
  Then later, like, just shower thoughts.
• 18:18
  He's in the shower and he's like, oh, she planned all this
• 18:21
  to take me to age. Oh.
• 18:22
  My God. Shampooing his hair like it's
• 18:25
  like you created this I'm. Not even sure he knows what
• 18:29
  shampoo is, but that's the mentality she's literally like.
• 18:33
  This is in her own head. Later, after the kiss, I would
• 18:37
  do anything for Owen. I would never report him to HR,
• 18:40
  even if he, like, totally abused me.
• 18:44
  You should have for that Dick pin anyway.
• 18:48
  Get your money, girl. Yous are underpaid and
• 18:50
  overworked. She wouldn't even get money
• 18:52
  though. In that sort of scenario, can
• 18:54
  you? Imagine she would go missing if
• 18:57
  she. Even went in HR office
• 18:59
  direction, she would go missing the next day.
• 19:03
  Like, he's actually deranged because constantly he's like,
• 19:06
  it's I'm trying to see what her game is I'm trying to see.
• 19:10
  And then he goes, if she went to HR, I'd deserve it.
• 19:13
  I'm like you. Did.
• 19:14
  But also HR is for the company. They would be on his side.
• 19:19
  They're not going to be on her side.
• 19:20
  They're. Going to be like Sue.
• 19:22
  Themselves. He has billions of dollars.
• 19:26
  Do you know what kind of lawyer he has?
• 19:30
  She got practically clipping coupons to go and get groceries.
• 19:34
  She does. 'Cause remember, she offers to
• 19:37
  buy. Pencils with a coupon she.
• 19:38
  Stole from my sister. So what kind of lawyer is she
• 19:43
  gonna have? She's gonna have Lionel Hearts
• 19:44
  from The Simpsons. Oh my God.
• 19:48
  I don't understand he. Can't be that.
• 19:51
  Paranoid. He can't be that dumb.
• 19:53
  He's. So, well, they do say he's not
• 19:56
  the smartest of the three. But why is he panicking about
• 19:59
  something he had full control over?
• 20:01
  But he keeps doing it, though at this point he's avoiding her
• 20:04
  like the plague. But then he's immediately in our
• 20:06
  office the next day taps her freckles or something with his
• 20:09
  pen. And I was like, what are you
• 20:11
  doing? That would be the most intimate
• 20:13
  thing that had happened to my life up until that point.
• 20:16
  I'm like, if that's if there's any moment that's going to make
• 20:19
  me walk to HR, the one. Exactly.
• 20:23
  You know, to be fair, she was described so badly.
• 20:27
  I yeah, I didn't listen. It was very generic.
• 20:29
  It was like her brown skin and her brown hair.
• 20:31
  I mean, at least they didn't come out here with the chalky
• 20:34
  skin because that would have killed.
• 20:36
  Oh, the caramel clays. They always got to do it to some
• 20:40
  random shit. When I see freckles, I don't
• 20:43
  think tanned person like, you know what I mean?
• 20:46
  I think like, yeah, literally the whitest bitching.
• 20:51
  Just an image of you like pops up in my head.
• 20:55
  Pale, pale and dehydrated. #Pale and dehydrated.
• 21:03
  Pale and dehydrated. So he the reason he's in her
• 21:07
  orbit again is because he's drawing for her.
• 21:10
  I'm sorry. I never want to read about
• 21:13
  anyone's PTSD ever again about drawing, because it fucking gave
• 21:18
  me the He's like, I'm sweating, I'm crying, I'm checking up.
• 21:23
  This bread? Oh dude, is this male privilege?
• 21:27
  Their PTSD isn't even not testing.
• 21:29
  Like what does this like? I'm too scared to go to a club
• 21:33
  with our pants on, but yours is about.
• 21:36
  I'm too scared to leave my house, but you're quaking over a
• 21:40
  HP pencil. Look.
• 21:41
  What is. These are not the same.
• 21:43
  He's like I. Just had to work up the courage
• 21:45
  to go to the craft store. Have dare a manly 30 year old
• 21:49
  man be. In the craft store who?
• 21:52
  Cares. Meanwhile, this poor girl is
• 21:57
  trying to bribe him to do all her drawings because apparently
• 22:01
  she's the only girly that can't draw on her.
• 22:04
  Oh yeah, it was embarrassing. She skipped over her own
• 22:06
  PowerPoint presentation. To work out how to use AI
• 22:09
  Photoshop literally like everyone else.
• 22:12
  Clip it all together. Morph it.
• 22:14
  She gives him her streaming password as payment.
• 22:18
  The man that owes the streaming? She's out here, probably
• 22:22
  spending. It owns Disney Plus and she just
• 22:24
  gave him the login to her Disney Plus, but he ate it up because
• 22:27
  then he gets to stalk her most recently.
• 22:29
  Watched, but she's probably paying like an extra $10.00 for
• 22:33
  an extra screen. Disgusting.
• 22:36
  He's raiding all of these employees constantly out of
• 22:40
  everything that brings them joy. Is a scam.
• 22:43
  He is the top of the pyramid. Scheme this.
• 22:45
  Is how they stay rich. They just steal other people's
• 22:48
  Disney Plus passwords. Actually, he's probably selling
• 22:52
  it to somebody else. No, he's selling her data.
• 22:58
  He's selling her actual data. Yes, he owns the company.
• 23:03
  Like, he couldn't just look up her IP address.
• 23:05
  He probably did, like, OK. What's?
• 23:08
  It like her saying HP address. No, but what?
• 23:11
  Is a HP. She was like HP address and he
• 23:13
  was like is. He like in this employee
• 23:14
  database or no? She meant like his IP address.
• 23:18
  He was like, you mean the IP address?
• 23:20
  Oh girl, you are not that delusional.
• 23:23
  They're trying to really make her look that dumb.
• 23:25
  They trying to make her look like she doesn't know how to
• 23:28
  turn on a computer. Zara doesn't need help looking
• 23:30
  dumb. She just wakes up in the
• 23:33
  morning. Riddle me this.
• 23:34
  Riddle me that why would someone who is a hairdresser a creative
• 23:38
  field? Why would she suck a drawing?
• 23:41
  I. Believe it.
• 23:41
  I feel like she would have the talent.
• 23:43
  Also, if she was drawing with Brady these ideas, she would
• 23:48
  somewhat have the talent. Exactly.
• 23:49
  He's not going to hang around with this chick.
• 23:51
  If she drew something that would look really munted, this is like
• 23:55
  hell. I'm literally Walt Disney.
• 23:57
  I don't have to be new. What's he?
• 23:59
  Doing all the work for her. But why was he cuddling up to
• 24:02
  like a 20 year old? We don't.
• 24:05
  Birthday girl, Birthday girl, Part 2.
• 24:08
  Age Gap romance. Dude, that would be more.
• 24:11
  Interesting than this. Well.
• 24:13
  It was an age. Gap it.
• 24:14
  Just Walt back. Just unfreeze him for a minute.
• 24:17
  We want to see something. Just take him out, freezer take
• 24:24
  him out. We just want to know we.
• 24:25
  Just want to see something, which is probably that they
• 24:29
  would have more chemistry. I don't know.
• 24:31
  I'm thinking about it whatever his name is.
• 24:34
  Brady or something. Brady.
• 24:36
  That doesn't sound like a great name, Grady, but like, what kind
• 24:38
  of name is that for an old man? I mean, you don't get to choose
• 24:43
  them when you're old, no. It just doesn't sound like.
• 24:47
  I don't. Know nothing I hate more in a
• 24:49
  book when they just say they're handsome and you just get the
• 24:52
  main film like character saying they're so hot.
• 24:55
  The guy on the cover is nothing, not who I would pick.
• 25:01
  Although for this character maybe.
• 25:03
  Yeah, I feel like. She's way too hot for him and I
• 25:05
  got no description of her. No, we did get descriptions of
• 25:08
  her, but it was descriptions of her read by a man.
• 25:11
  So it was like curvy long legs golden.
• 25:15
  The sun is shining out of her vagina.
• 25:17
  Who's. Kirby and long legged, come on
• 25:20
  now, God's favorite. God's favorite?
• 25:22
  No way. There's always one.
• 25:24
  There's always one. Bitch, one Amazonian queen.
• 25:27
  Just here ruin it for everyone. It's just.
• 25:31
  The trope of the man that can't function as a human being
• 25:35
  because he's so. Out of.
• 25:36
  Touch because he's so rich and everything.
• 25:38
  I just. Want to know what this man does
• 25:40
  all day? He gets so tired just stalking
• 25:43
  Zara all day and then he just lays.
• 25:45
  Back in bed, Yeah, he's so obsessed, but he represses it so
• 25:50
  much. That's the entire drama of the
• 25:53
  book, which not good enough. Sorry.
• 25:55
  No. Him repressing his feelings the
• 25:58
  whole book. He's honestly the most
• 26:02
  embarrassing male character. There's not a second.
• 26:04
  I didn't get the ick by some random thing moving to ick
• 26:08
  number fucking whatever I was at at the time.
• 26:13
  She's starting a mentorship for disabilities.
• 26:15
  I think it's like a second weekend.
• 26:17
  Her sister has Down syndrome. So does her sister's partner.
• 26:22
  He steals all the fucking numbers.
• 26:24
  He's like, how dare she be in a room with other people?
• 26:28
  He was so mad that someone would have taken one of her phone
• 26:32
  numbers. Yeah, it doesn't.
• 26:33
  It's not like, she said. Female, 23, looking to be dicked
• 26:37
  down and then had a phone number on it.
• 26:39
  And it was. Her work.
• 26:42
  Colleagues, it was her colleagues.
• 26:43
  It was only people that would have been in the warehouse.
• 26:45
  It's because he's doing it so he thinks someone would be like,
• 26:47
  oh, everyone knows who Zara is. And then he showed up like the
• 26:50
  Dick he is ready to ruin it. And he was like, I'm very
• 26:54
  humbled by the fact that they walked in there.
• 26:57
  Fucking idiot. Idiot.
• 26:58
  Idiot. Sorry he was so riled up.
• 27:02
  He was so riled up. He's like, how would anyone in
• 27:06
  the team want her to? You know that she can speak to
• 27:09
  other people, right? Other people in the team
• 27:11
  probably already have her on social media.
• 27:13
  And you know what though? She never speaks to anyone other
• 27:15
  than Jenny or Claire. Boring.
• 27:18
  Boring She's. Hot.
• 27:20
  She's single. Add another man in there.
• 27:23
  She's 23, he's 30. She's a little bit more flirty,
• 27:29
  I reckon. I didn't see it anywhere.
• 27:32
  She felt guilty having basic ass conversations with quote UN
• 27:35
  quote. Scott.
• 27:37
  Can we introduce the whole Yes go conflict of Scott.
• 27:40
  The conflict. Of Scott.
• 27:42
  Because Rowan produces some pictures to help Zara with her
• 27:45
  future work. God for she.
• 27:47
  Goes, Oh my God, this is so nice.
• 27:49
  Please tell me who the artist is so I can thank them.
• 27:53
  And he's like, oh, because he obviously drew them.
• 27:55
  He's like, oh, I'm too anally retentive to actually tell you
• 27:58
  the truth. So I'll just make up a whole
• 27:59
  different person. And he's like, oh, the person's
• 28:02
  just shy or whatever. And then he took the number
• 28:05
  anyway. He really thought she was going
• 28:08
  to start like this whole pull Rowan from his throne situation.
• 28:13
  For what? That's what he thought was going
• 28:15
  to happen. He's like, oh, they're going to
• 28:16
  go against me. It's you.
• 28:19
  You're the. Problem.
• 28:20
  You're the other person. He starts getting paranoid about
• 28:25
  Scott until he realizes he made-up Scott.
• 28:28
  I feel like he would. He would.
• 28:29
  Stare in the mirror, pointing at himself like don't.
• 28:32
  Message her. Back how?
• 28:34
  Dare you? I just can't deal.
• 28:36
  So he uses her number, which essentially he should have
• 28:39
  already had from that group thing.
• 28:41
  Fucking texts her up it and he's like, oh, it's so nice to be
• 28:44
  able to talk to her like a normal just open up to the door.
• 28:48
  Person in the first place. Just be and no.
• 28:51
  One was making you do. This.
• 28:53
  And he was so surprised that she didn't want anything off Scott.
• 28:56
  She doesn't want anything. But all she was doing was doing
• 28:59
  nice. She just wants her job and to do
• 29:01
  good. At it.
• 29:02
  She just wanted to say thank you to the person helping her.
• 29:04
  Atrocious drawings. Sidecar to this exact thing,
• 29:08
  Yes. Why was she flirting with a man
• 29:10
  she's never seen? That's what I don't get.
• 29:14
  Even Claire, her friend in the book, goes.
• 29:16
  Girl. Is he not an old man?
• 29:18
  Because he could very much be an old man.
• 29:20
  She's the type of person who would get catfish though easily,
• 29:23
  if you think about it. Easily.
• 29:25
  Because she's like, I don't care about money.
• 29:27
  I don't care about the outside. I just want someone to like me
• 29:31
  for me. And it's just this full
• 29:33
  crackhead. But she would fall.
• 29:34
  In love and. It's just Randy, the old guy.
• 29:37
  But she would fall in love at the moment.
• 29:39
  I feel like because she was scared of everything that
• 29:41
  happened with Lance, this was her way to have some kind of
• 29:44
  hope, this fairy tale of someone.
• 29:47
  If you were scared of going through something again with
• 29:49
  like Lance, why would you go for some random guy that you have no
• 29:52
  idea, literally. Tinder exists What?
• 29:55
  You have trust issues, but you don't have enough trust issues
• 29:58
  that you're trusting a random number.
• 30:00
  Exactly. But she was friendly.
• 30:02
  She wasn't overly like. Send me your.
• 30:04
  Dick No, I feel like it was in the air.
• 30:07
  I'm. Surprised she didn't get a Dick
• 30:10
  pic. I was waiting to see if she
• 30:12
  realized it was him. That's what I thought was going
• 30:14
  to happen, but she's too dumb for that.
• 30:16
  My bad. My bad, I thought she.
• 30:18
  Kind of put it together. There is so many things that
• 30:20
  actually threw me off in this book and it's my fault for
• 30:23
  reading other books. Also, she talked very basic with
• 30:26
  Scott about Oh my favorite movies Pride and Prejudice.
• 30:29
  This. This man.
• 30:30
  Goes and watches 17 versions of Pride and Prejudice.
• 30:34
  I want to know. When he had the time.
• 30:35
  Because he doesn't do actual work, he just tells everyone
• 30:38
  else to come up with all the ideas.
• 30:39
  He seemed like I had a really hard work week and he's just
• 30:42
  been watching Pride. With ice cream.
• 30:46
  He's at home and then he just gets up.
• 30:48
  He's painting his tail, his tail.
• 30:51
  He's painting his toenails. In his office, watching Pride
• 31:00
  and Martha's. Like, what are you doing working
• 31:03
  through Martha's? Probably just doing his job.
• 31:06
  Poor Martha. So he sends Zara the BuzzFeed
• 31:10
  quiz. First of all, BuzzFeed who
• 31:15
  thought that it was a good idea to type the word BuzzFeed in a
• 31:19
  fucking novel. Who, even who even used?
• 31:24
  Just fuck off. I quit.
• 31:26
  Do you reckon he watched these? Pride and prejudices movies.
• 31:29
  You got someone else to watch him and send him a greater
• 31:32
  review. Yeah, true.
• 31:33
  I'd be on Rotten Tomatoes that fast.
• 31:35
  Anyway, her undies were flooded when she got that BuzzFeed quiz.
• 31:40
  Way this man could have just had her wrapped around his little
• 31:43
  finger. If he just Wayne is rolling.
• 31:45
  Why? Why?
• 31:48
  Why? Why?
• 31:50
  So hard for a man that was a varsity bowler.
• 31:55
  Girl, I thought he was fucking kidding too.
• 31:57
  So learn how to make fun of yourself, you piece of shit, he.
• 32:03
  Was he said it with his whole chest and was so mad at her?
• 32:06
  Like that wasn't the most embarrassing sentence to.
• 32:09
  Come out of his mouth. But also, this is another
• 32:11
  scenario where he's that billionaire who can't function
• 32:14
  trope. He can't do a single thing.
• 32:16
  She goes, oh, he won't be able to wear the rental shoes.
• 32:24
  So. Did he go buy some?
• 32:26
  He did. Psychopathic behavior.
• 32:29
  You know, between the bowling and the pumpkin carving and the
• 32:33
  gingerbread house. You know he googled exactly.
• 32:37
  No. If he was, no, this is even
• 32:39
  worse. I was going to say if he he
• 32:41
  would have went and Googled where to get shoes from, but he
• 32:45
  was a varsity bowler so he probably just has a closet full
• 32:48
  of bowling. That's so true.
• 32:52
  I'm surprised he didn't walk in there with a little baggie, with
• 32:54
  a little bowling ball in it, with her face on it.
• 32:58
  Up his own ass about it because she literally giggled and he was
• 33:02
  going to kill himself. Actual she she, like,
• 33:08
  backtracked. And she was like, Oh my God, I
• 33:11
  just sorry, I didn't think he. Was serious.
• 33:14
  Bitchy laugh he. Was like, I'm gonna help you,
• 33:16
  'cause I was. And then he was like slowly
• 33:18
  leaving in depression. Like, are you kidding?
• 33:20
  If my boyfriend said something remotely embarrassing, I am
• 33:24
  laughing full force in his face. My boyfriend said that to me.
• 33:28
  I I would be like, I never want to hear that again.
• 33:31
  We're going to, we're going to put a pause in this
• 33:32
  conversation. And pretend that never fucking
• 33:35
  like into it. We're going to take you out
• 33:38
  bowling them. My boyfriend once said he called
• 33:42
  Jam friends of the forest instead of fruits of the forest.
• 33:44
  So now, every time I think of it, I'm like you little friends
• 33:47
  of the forest. That's kind of funny though.
• 33:51
  Fucking hates. We're their biggest bullies.
• 33:56
  I just can't imagine a grown man he is 7 years her senior to have
• 34:02
  this little of a backbone. How is someone at the top of the
• 34:06
  corporate ladder who's fucking fragile?
• 34:08
  Is he known for being such a brutal CEO or CFO?
• 34:12
  Whatever he is, whoops is. He being brutal to because he
• 34:18
  called her in for a meeting and gave her a fucking promotion.
• 34:21
  Who was? He.
• 34:21
  Firing. There's a part in this book
• 34:24
  where he was like, my dad called me weak.
• 34:27
  And you know what I did? Fired people.
• 34:29
  And I'm like, OK, strong man, OK, big.
• 34:32
  Boy. OK, you emotionally well-rounded
• 34:36
  man. He had a little kids from a
• 34:39
  daddy. Caught you wheat.
• 34:41
  So he just had a little little spats on the floor.
• 34:44
  To be fair, his whole life is just a series of mantrums
• 34:49
  instead of Lemony Snicket Series of Unfortunate Events.
• 34:52
  It's this guy's mantrum. This man has constant either
• 34:56
  indigestion or. Constipated.
• 34:58
  There's no in between. Because he doesn't eat fiber.
• 35:01
  No, and he doesn't take a shit. You just know he doesn't poop.
• 35:07
  He's got colon polyps. He needs a colonoscopy stat.
• 35:13
  Roses Donkey. 'S arse is bleeding essentially
• 35:16
  all the time. He's.
• 35:16
  Got rectal impaction. He's got hemorrhoids,
• 35:22
  hemorrhoids, hemorrhoids. On hemorrhoids, oh.
• 35:26
  He's arse be bleeding. Something needs to loosen up and
• 35:31
  it's. I.
• 35:38
  Just, I don't know. I feel like his ass.
• 35:42
  It's so tight that it's just fused.
• 35:45
  Shut the pole. Is so fucking.
• 35:49
  Deep that it's got no work around.
• 35:55
  He just has not shit. He has so much poo he's getting.
• 35:58
  Colonoscopies for days. When he finally goes?
• 36:02
  When he. When he has time, that's where
• 36:04
  he's all these meeting times. I.
• 36:08
  Just don't understand. I just sphincter.
• 36:14
  It's just clothes. That poor little baby sphincter.
• 36:17
  It's just I can't imagine this man having sex.
• 36:24
  Can you? I.
• 36:26
  Really thought with how often the condom was mentioned, we
• 36:30
  were going to have a you know how unhooked.
• 36:31
  The one time he didn't use it and she got pregnant, that's
• 36:34
  what I thought was going to happen.
• 36:35
  It didn't. It was even worse.
• 36:37
  But we'll get to it, OK? Can we talk about, We've already
• 36:41
  established she's been chatting to this Scott guy, friendly,
• 36:45
  trying to get to know him being like, oh, I kind of like this.
• 36:48
  She's sitting there bashing on herself being like you harlot.
• 36:54
  For. Texting a man that she hasn't
• 36:56
  even seen. She's not even texting him
• 36:58
  anything flirtatious. And she's so kind of likes
• 37:01
  Rowan. She's porn.
• 37:04
  She doesn't know what she wants. What is this, the 5th?
• 37:06
  Grade No one cares if you like 2 boys at once.
• 37:09
  Come on now. We've read other books.
• 37:11
  You can pull them both. This would never.
• 37:13
  Be reversed area with his multiple personalities she's.
• 37:16
  So scared. What are you scared of, girl?
• 37:19
  What are you scared? She's like, Oh my God, me being
• 37:23
  attracted to two guys at once, even though Lance broke it off
• 37:26
  10 years ago by cheating on me. Oh my.
• 37:28
  God, she gets an out from these feelings and then whines back
• 37:32
  into it. She's doing a work day.
• 37:35
  She's taking it. Why?
• 37:38
  OK, Adding to why he's the most terrible man ever.
• 37:42
  She's taking an unpaid vacation day to walk around the park to
• 37:46
  do work. And he talks to Jenny and
• 37:48
  they're like, we're thinking about taking an unpaid vacation
• 37:52
  day because, you know, we don't want to.
• 37:55
  It's hard. We don't want to lose our unpaid
• 37:57
  vacation days. And he's like, take it as a paid
• 37:59
  vacation on me, on the House. What do you mean?
• 38:03
  Bare minimum for one you're doing.
• 38:06
  Work is that part of research. It is.
• 38:10
  It's still in their work hours. And you're a guest in the park.
• 38:14
  You're trying to learn the guest experience.
• 38:15
  You're not doing Molly and fucking kind of like.
• 38:19
  Like just around. You've actually got a notebook,
• 38:22
  and you're writing things down. You're.
• 38:23
  Talking to people, you're waiting in line like you're
• 38:26
  still giving a staff experience. Are you kidding?
• 38:29
  Fucking foul. Anyway, he finds her in the park
• 38:32
  and they this is the first time he sees the snow that's been
• 38:35
  there for like a year or ever. They kiss in the snow and then
• 38:41
  he has another tantrum. Of course he does.
• 38:44
  He has another tantrum and calls her insufferable.
• 38:46
  Why are you so upset that you're attracted to a woman?
• 38:49
  It's because he's so gay. Literally, he's so.
• 38:53
  Gay. He feels so guilty for being gay
• 38:57
  that he takes it all out on her. And he's like, how dare you vile
• 39:01
  Tetris. How dare he hates women?
• 39:04
  He's literally frolo from the touchback of Notre Dame blaming
• 39:08
  Esmeralda. Why are we?
• 39:10
  Frothing over men in books that hate women, He.
• 39:14
  Hates. Women straight up fucking hate
• 39:16
  women. Give me a man in a book like
• 39:19
  this where they do not hate women.
• 39:21
  Crickets. Fucking crickets.
• 39:24
  I don't understand. In this entire part.
• 39:27
  He has to go at her. He's like, yelling at her.
• 39:29
  He's like, I don't understand how I'm attracted.
• 39:32
  Attracted to her. Why?
• 39:34
  Insufferable female. If some man called me a fucking
• 39:36
  female, get it right. It's a woman.
• 39:39
  Let's not lower this down. I wouldn't ever speak to him
• 39:41
  again. You don't yell at me in public.
• 39:43
  I'm not going to speak to you again.
• 39:44
  It's. Literally horrible.
• 39:48
  He calls her an insufferable female.
• 39:50
  That's what I mean. And he says you represent
• 39:53
  everything I dislike in someone. So you're just gay?
• 39:57
  Yeah. So you don't like the badge?
• 39:59
  Yeah. That's.
• 40:00
  Fine. You can see how he feels about
• 40:02
  women, yeah. He says female, which is instant
• 40:06
  Andrew Tate. Yeah, it's instant Andrew Tate.
• 40:09
  Like straight away. There's a whole science behind
• 40:12
  the female thing. But just an insult.
• 40:14
  So there's never. No redeeming qualities.
• 40:18
  Never not gives me the ick in this entire book.
• 40:21
  It's just no. Ridiculous.
• 40:22
  It just gets worse and. Worse, it gets worse and worse.
• 40:25
  So he's meeting up with Arnie multiple times, yes.
• 40:29
  And at that point in the book, I didn't realize that they had
• 40:31
  agreed to the sponsorship thing. So I just thought they were
• 40:33
  hanging out. And I was like, why is he going
• 40:35
  on mini dates with that sister? But he uses the sister for
• 40:39
  information and then a guilt trip later.
• 40:41
  So this fake relationship he's building up with her disabled
• 40:45
  younger sister? Yes, I feel like he's very much
• 40:47
  taking advantage of her, literally.
• 40:50
  I do like that he's really nice to her.
• 40:54
  But I'm like, it's a bare minimum.
• 40:55
  It's a bare minimum. He wouldn't be if he saw her in
• 40:58
  line. No, that's the and that's the
• 41:00
  problem. He was fucking cracking the
• 41:02
  shits at other people. Being just in line, imagine
• 41:05
  someone that wasn't fully able bodied.
• 41:08
  He would be like I. Don't understand how the bare
• 41:13
  for them fixing the park is to make it more Yeah, fucking
• 41:17
  insane, but okay. But you know that he wouldn't
• 41:20
  give a fuck if it was any other employees sibling.
• 41:23
  No, he wouldn't. It's only because he gets what
• 41:25
  he wants out of it eventually, which is frothing over Zara.
• 41:28
  I would have died if Zara was texting Scott and then just mad
• 41:33
  ripped into Rowan. I was waiting.
• 41:35
  For it, yes. She's too good of a person than
• 41:37
  me. I'd be like my boss is an
• 41:39
  asshole. He made out with me.
• 41:41
  I'm going to HR on Monday like. Fuck him up.
• 41:44
  Fuck him up when they do talk. About Rowan, she's like, I
• 41:47
  reckon he runs on solar power. He's just got so much energy.
• 41:50
  Tell him how he is. This man runs on pure depression
• 41:53
  and coffee. Exactly.
• 41:55
  Exactly. He's the most clinically
• 41:57
  depressed person we've ever talked about.
• 42:00
  I'm sorry. It really gets.
• 42:04
  Worse. Like, it only gets worse.
• 42:07
  At this point in the book, I was realizing that every fucking
• 42:11
  conversation is Zara and Rowan, where they're internally to
• 42:16
  themselves or to each other, are confused about what feelings
• 42:20
  are, and they're struggling for their life to flirt with each
• 42:23
  other the dynamic. They flirt in their they flirt
• 42:25
  in their head and not to the actual person.
• 42:27
  I. Know then the banter wasn't
• 42:29
  there. You know how in these type of
• 42:30
  books you usually eat up the banter?
• 42:32
  Yes, you're like grumpy sunshine NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM.
• 42:34
  At least I know there's going to be the back.
• 42:36
  And forth, yeah, I will give it a little extra point, because
• 42:40
  while I was listening to this while like cleaning my room,
• 42:43
  every now and then I'd have a little giggle by some random
• 42:45
  shit they would say in their head.
• 42:46
  But it was like, what is? Head it wasn't to each.
• 42:49
  Other That's what I mean. And I'm like, you put that
• 42:51
  effort into talking to each other.
• 42:53
  It's so much funnier. Exactly.
• 42:55
  Basically rolling at this point was thinking.
• 42:57
  And this is after he's kissed her multiple times, you know
• 43:00
  what I mean? Like he's pursued her multiple
• 43:01
  times and he said this to himself.
• 43:03
  In his head, if she. Turns out to be a decent human
• 43:06
  being, then I have to like her. And then that's the biggest
• 43:10
  problem in my entire life. She.
• 43:11
  Hasn't given you any reason not to be, and it fucking pissed me
• 43:15
  off. And his reasons for having trust
• 43:17
  issues turn out to be really random.
• 43:20
  They are the weirdest shit. It's not her fault you grew up
• 43:23
  rich. Zara's like the whole time.
• 43:25
  Oh, he's so mysterious. And I really like how he
• 43:29
  mansplains everything to me. The bowling, the way that he man
• 43:32
  playing the bowling, I was like, just throw the fucking ball,
• 43:34
  idiot. If someone mansling bowling to
• 43:37
  me, it's on site. Just throw the bowling ball at
• 43:41
  his head, you. Are copping get 10K bowling
• 43:44
  balling Why? I like how she couldn't work out
• 43:46
  the wrist, so they had to do it four more times.
• 43:48
  Who bowled? Seriously.
• 43:51
  Exactly. Seriously.
• 43:52
  Dead ass. It's not for real.
• 43:54
  It's not for real. A fake.
• 43:56
  Game. Relax.
• 43:59
  I don't know. How?
• 44:00
  How? Stingy is America though,
• 44:02
  because they have a time limit in Australia.
• 44:04
  You go into your top game is done.
• 44:06
  Yeah. How you could be there for like
• 44:08
  3 hours, they wouldn't say a single thing to you.
• 44:10
  Because what? What if you take a while?
• 44:13
  Like what if you're having? Fun.
• 44:14
  I mean, what if you need some little emotionally repressed man
• 44:18
  to show you how to but? Then what do you do if you're
• 44:20
  only halfway through the game? I don't get how that works.
• 44:23
  One time they were working late together or something stupid.
• 44:27
  Yeah. And then he realized that she's
• 44:30
  a human being because he's not. He's a robot.
• 44:32
  And he realized she's probably hungry.
• 44:34
  He ordered them take away, and she was practically like no
• 44:39
  one's ever thought of ordering. Takeaways before he's not even,
• 44:42
  he's not even that good. It was worse than that.
• 44:44
  She was texting Scott and was like, I'm still at work.
• 44:48
  I'm still at work late and he's like, oh, I think she was like,
• 44:51
  oh, I'm really hungry though or something like she bring it up.
• 44:54
  And then he went in there and ordered food.
• 44:56
  He never knew she was. Not he was just cottoned onto a
• 44:59
  human having. No, he wasn't even cottoned on.
• 45:02
  So that's why I think that's why she was super pissed, because
• 45:05
  she was like, you lied to me about Scott and you were
• 45:09
  manipulating my feelings for Rowan.
• 45:11
  And I think that's what she means because she was using
• 45:14
  Scott to make him better. You know when he did the reveal?
• 45:19
  Wasn't that just shitty timing as well?
• 45:21
  It was right after they kissed in the snow.
• 45:24
  So they kissed in the snow. She cracked the shits, and then
• 45:27
  he called her into the office. She assumed she was getting
• 45:29
  fired again, he revealed. And she's like.
• 45:33
  That's even worse. That's it.
• 45:34
  She's like, that's worse. She's like she's like what the
• 45:38
  fuck? Not only are you my boss and
• 45:40
  hitting on me all the time, but. Yeah, you.
• 45:42
  Went out of your way to catfish me as well.
• 45:45
  And then I think she goes to ignore him some more.
• 45:47
  So he's like, you need to come to my house for dinner.
• 45:50
  How does this man apologize? How does he apologize?
• 45:54
  Guess what? It's not the Oral Sex to
• 45:58
  Forgiveness World Tour. No.
• 46:00
  It's the My mummy died from cancer and my daddy was mean to
• 46:07
  me. That was his apology, even.
• 46:10
  He. Trauma dumped on her so that
• 46:13
  she'd feel bad. There's another time when
• 46:15
  they're on a date, Any trauma dumps on her again?
• 46:17
  But this was his apology. He, like, gave her the whole
• 46:20
  traumatic story about how his mum died because she had cancer.
• 46:23
  Who's of course, the mum dies. Hello.
• 46:26
  And not only that, we segued from mum's cancer to him losing
• 46:31
  his virginity and it was recorded on video and used as
• 46:35
  blackmail. It's almost like she felt
• 46:37
  guilty. Like, Oh no, I have to make up
• 46:40
  for the human race on the behalf of the girl that's blackmailed
• 46:43
  you. Or the pins and the condom, Yes,
• 46:47
  yeah. What the fuck?
• 46:48
  I actually did notice that he doesn't let anyone touch a
• 46:51
  condom a single time except him. You're not Drake, Sorry.
• 46:57
  Gandhi I. Just don't understand.
• 46:59
  He must have billions of dollars.
• 47:01
  But then just don't date people or use sex workers or something.
• 47:06
  If you're so scared of getting emotionally close to someone.
• 47:09
  Wouldn't he have a Rolodex of sex workers?
• 47:11
  Actually, this makes so much sense for when they have sex,
• 47:14
  because what book boyfriend in what universe has sex the first
• 47:18
  time one time? Usually they go in for hours.
• 47:22
  Yeah. Why?
• 47:24
  OK, you're telling me he didn't manipulate this whole thing as
• 47:28
  well? Because when she showed up to
• 47:30
  his house, his fairy tale house, he was wearing track pants and
• 47:34
  like A at shirt and his glasses and he just looks so sad.
• 47:38
  Shut up. No man.
• 47:39
  Sad in a mansion, you know that he was just sucking on a cigar
• 47:43
  in his premium gold plated bowling alley.
• 47:46
  He was. Fine.
• 47:48
  Inside, like fucking, his little under swirling a little whiskey
• 47:51
  around. Every time this man wore
• 47:54
  glasses, she was frothing. I'm like, what?
• 47:57
  Calm down. The bare minimum was She's so
• 47:59
  hyped over him wearing sweatpants.
• 48:01
  You know that man doesn't wash his ass.
• 48:03
  He's probably not wearing underwear.
• 48:05
  No, you know what it's giving me?
• 48:07
  American Psycho. I feel like his ass does not
• 48:09
  have a hair. I feel like it's unnaturally
• 48:12
  clean. I feel like you could pull up a
• 48:14
  microscope to his asshole, the one that's never opened, because
• 48:18
  nothing's open. So no bacteria's coming out so
• 48:20
  like it. Is.
• 48:21
  Immaculately clean, like there's no surface in his mansion.
• 48:25
  He's bideting the shit out of it.
• 48:27
  Bideted, bideted, bideted, Bideted.
• 48:29
  Like. There's not a Biome.
• 48:33
  No. No, I feel like there's a lot of
• 48:36
  screws that are loose because the effect how paranoid he.
• 48:40
  Was. He takes her inside.
• 48:42
  I'm pretty sure he forces her to eat first.
• 48:45
  He wants to date her, but he's like, no, I tolerate you more
• 48:48
  than most people. That's why I want to date you.
• 48:50
  Cool, cool. That's like the bare minimum.
• 48:52
  That's. Like the most romantic thing
• 48:54
  that anyone's ever said in 2024. Not only that, no.
• 49:00
  We're out in the. Poetry.
• 49:02
  Poetry. At this point, probing, he
• 49:07
  clearly says. That's why I want to date you.
• 49:09
  Yeah, I'm pretty sure after they have sex or during sex, he's
• 49:12
  like, I just want to keep this casual.
• 49:14
  What is it then? Do you want to date her?
• 49:17
  Casual. Or do you want just casual sex?
• 49:19
  Well. Obviously the pussy wasn't
• 49:21
  slapping. That's the only thing that could
• 49:24
  have possibly happened between them.
• 49:29
  He's like oh. Not as good as I thought it was.
• 49:31
  Going to be what? Let's go cash.
• 49:34
  Let's go let's. Wind this back.
• 49:35
  Let's go. OK, so this is when we're
• 49:38
  reeling to the first sex scene. And.
• 49:44
  I spent the entire time trying to work through the fact that he
• 49:51
  crawled over to her on his knees.
• 49:53
  Girl. They.
• 49:54
  Were having a serious conversation.
• 49:56
  Was he on his knees the whole time?
• 49:58
  They were sitting on cushions on the floor and then they wait to
• 50:01
  have sex and he crawled over to her on his knees and I was like,
• 50:05
  no. Absolutely not.
• 50:06
  It's giving. The hills have eyes.
• 50:08
  I. It's.
• 50:09
  Giving. Horrified movie horrified.
• 50:12
  I'd like kick him off. They were trying to be sexy at
• 50:15
  this point, and I'm still thinking about the fact that he
• 50:17
  crawled over on his knees and I just can't with this man.
• 50:20
  He's so fucking embarrassing, Can.
• 50:22
  You imagine him scooching his knees like really little
• 50:24
  scooches. May I please have a crumbled
• 50:29
  pussy? He's just so he's doing that
• 50:31
  full arm movement. Like Captain Kim, Like.
• 50:35
  Yeah, on his knees. Slave, He's skating towards her
• 50:39
  like Disney on Ice, bit on his knees, he does a little. 12 It
• 50:44
  was discussing the only thing that rang me back from the IT
• 50:48
  was a hard time And this is the bam.
• 50:50
  She he's hard. He's eating her out.
• 50:53
  She's like, do you want some help with that?
• 50:55
  And he's like, this is the. Only town that.
• 50:58
  Does it itself. She's like, you're really not
• 51:01
  hitting the spot. I was talking about his Dick,
• 51:04
  not. Hers at this point she's like,
• 51:10
  move that. Away.
• 51:14
  Right. So he's eating her out.
• 51:15
  She's she's orgasm. She's came.
• 51:17
  She's good. She's.
• 51:18
  Came Bear the bear. She's came, she's gone.
• 51:21
  She's conquered. She's like, you don't want any
• 51:25
  help with that little problem. Because let's be honest.
• 51:29
  And he's like, take a man out to dinner first.
• 51:31
  It's the only funny thing he's ever said.
• 51:33
  Sorry. So ridiculous.
• 51:37
  Do you know exactly what I'm? Talking about, I don't.
• 51:39
  OK, he goes take a man out to dinner 1st and she goes, does my
• 51:42
  pussy count? And at that point I was, I was
• 51:47
  fair feel, rested and dead. And it was the only only hope,
• 51:51
  the only smidge of hope I had for this entire thing.
• 51:55
  What does she got? Count pussy up like I'd be like.
• 52:02
  What do you mean one? He was so into it.
• 52:08
  He. Would be into.
• 52:10
  It I'm like, he's so unfunny that the only thing he could
• 52:14
  think of was taking man, she did a first.
• 52:17
  So that's a no bye. I was like, well, I offered.
• 52:22
  See you. See you later, idiot.
• 52:27
  She's like, I'm poor like. That's why she was like Does the
• 52:30
  pussy count because she can't afford dinner?
• 52:32
  No. No, she's like my Uber's already
• 52:34
  on the way. She's like, I'm already barely
• 52:36
  on minimum wage at this point. We're on $2.00 an hour and you
• 52:39
  think I'm going to take you out to dinner?
• 52:41
  The coochie counts. OK, this is the best part
• 52:44
  because it doesn't make sense why he said he wants casual.
• 52:47
  She simply lays there and takes the Dick bar.
• 52:50
  Afterwards he goes, Oh my God, this is exactly the type of
• 52:53
  woman I want and needs in the bedroom.
• 52:56
  What the bare minimum? The bare minimum she did.
• 52:59
  Nothing. No, that's what I mean.
• 53:01
  His mind is blown. He's like, this is exactly the
• 53:04
  woman I want. Immediately after they have sex,
• 53:06
  she goes. I'm absolutely useless after
• 53:09
  Rowan fucked me into near unconsciousness.
• 53:12
  He honestly doesn't seem like he does a thing.
• 53:15
  They're in that post. Sex glow, blah blah blah moment.
• 53:19
  She hinted if she was going to stay the night because you kind
• 53:21
  of need to know these things. She was.
• 53:22
  Getting dressed? Yeah, she was getting dressed
• 53:24
  like, I'm out of here. What are we doing?
• 53:26
  Literally, he took a whole ass minute to say that he doesn't
• 53:31
  want her to sleep over. No, he does.
• 53:34
  He wanted her to. But he took a whole minute to
• 53:36
  say he doesn't. I feel like he does want her to
• 53:39
  sleep over. No, but I think, I think he's,
• 53:41
  he come around to say he did want her to, but if he has this
• 53:45
  gap where it's just crickets, yeah, he doesn't want you to say
• 53:49
  about that she was. She was getting dressed like she
• 53:52
  was and he was like, but he was taking her clothes off her too.
• 53:56
  He's the words. Mixed messages.
• 53:58
  Decide what you want. Because if that was me, my ego
• 54:01
  would be like, fuck off, you took a whole awkward, silent
• 54:05
  minute. Yeah, you let me get up.
• 54:08
  You let me search the room. That man would never see me
• 54:10
  again. Honestly.
• 54:13
  So there was this big build up about his what his fucking
• 54:15
  stupid secret middle name would be.
• 54:17
  Guess what I was hoping it would be?
• 54:18
  Gary. Gary.
• 54:19
  Justice. Gary.
• 54:25
  All right, P Gary. There was a bit there.
• 54:29
  Rowan mentioned his mom and obviously she died from cancer,
• 54:31
  so the only time he would ever mention her would be the cancer
• 54:34
  except for this time. Guess what?
• 54:36
  He said He was really glad that his mom wasn't progressive.
• 54:42
  I don't like everything makes sense.
• 54:44
  That's me. But that's only because she was
• 54:47
  guessing middle names and she was like Geraldine or something
• 54:49
  like something ridiculous. Yeah, but he was like, thank God
• 54:52
  my mom wasn't one of those day them, like, thank God she would
• 54:58
  have voted no for gay marriage. He's like, thank God she just
• 55:02
  stayed in the kitchen. She just at home.
• 55:05
  She was a mother and mother only where she.
• 55:07
  Should be. No, no thoughts in her head.
• 55:10
  I was like that. Plus, the females come.
• 55:13
  On I'm not surprised. We're building a case here for
• 55:15
  Rowan. The case started up long before
• 55:18
  then the. Case started the emotional range
• 55:20
  of a rock. I mean, he's been digging the
• 55:23
  deepest hole. Can we skip ahead to when
• 55:26
  they're out having a fancy dinner, which again is nice
• 55:28
  messages. They go on the fancies dinner of
• 55:30
  their entire life and he's pretending they're casual.
• 55:33
  He keeps asking her out on dates and calling them dates and he
• 55:36
  keeps saying all I want is the bomb pussy bitch, why are you
• 55:40
  even going out for? Dinner.
• 55:41
  What are you doing? Casual happens in the in the
• 55:43
  bedroom only bedroom only, not in public weekends only, not
• 55:48
  official. Not at work. 2:00 AM only.
• 55:52
  No. Food?
• 55:53
  No. We're sharing food, No.
• 55:55
  Showing up to her workplace to confirm this dinner too, because
• 55:59
  she she dropped her phone in the toilet.
• 56:02
  So if it was me that was out having dinner with a
• 56:06
  billionaire, and my ex happens to be in the same fucking
• 56:10
  restaurant, that is a wet dream for me.
• 56:13
  Are you? Kidding.
• 56:14
  Are you? She was embarrassed.
• 56:17
  She was ridiculous. That's the girl.
• 56:20
  He cheated on me. And now they're engaged and
• 56:22
  like, oh, you want me? I'm.
• 56:24
  Confused. You're telling me Lance can
• 56:27
  afford to take his? Yeah, because he designed the
• 56:30
  big ride. That is their biggest money
• 56:33
  maker, I guess. I love how Rowan just sends him
• 56:36
  to Shanghai. He's like, you either have a job
• 56:39
  or you don't, But it's at Shanghai.
• 56:41
  I just want to know where the girlfriend went.
• 56:43
  Did she go with us? Who knows?
• 56:45
  The best part was when Lance walks up to their table assumes
• 56:49
  that they're on a business meeting.
• 56:51
  She's dressed in a little corset.
• 56:53
  Dress with a little floppy skirt.
• 56:55
  He kissed her hand in front of the man.
• 56:57
  He said. Grabbed her hand and kissed it.
• 56:59
  And Lance is like, oh that's cute that you're hanging out
• 57:01
  with your employees. Dead ass.
• 57:05
  He was staring him down while he was kissing her hand too.
• 57:07
  He was like, this is mine, Lance.
• 57:09
  'S Delusion. It's the only time Rowan gets
• 57:12
  one point. But it's almost like Lance is
• 57:15
  delusional in the opposite way that Rowan is, because Lance is
• 57:17
  like, there's nothing happening over there.
• 57:20
  If she spoke to Lance separately, Rowan would be like
• 57:23
  they're getting back together a. 100%.
• 57:26
  We know that Lance is the typical he's the book
• 57:30
  ex-boyfriend who's just an asshole to make hands look.
• 57:33
  Good. No, barely.
• 57:35
  Not only was he said that you were on a work meeting while he
• 57:39
  was hugging her on the side too, when they stood up holding her
• 57:42
  waist so he was full over, hands up her Duff.
• 57:47
  Hands on the muff. Hands on the muff, practically.
• 57:50
  Fingering her. She's bent over, quivering.
• 57:56
  Lance is like there's nothing to see here.
• 57:58
  She's like she could never. She would never.
• 58:00
  And The thing is, Lance. Who cares?
• 58:04
  He was not a complex enough bad guy because nobody's the young
• 58:08
  guy in this but Rowan, and you cannot convince me otherwise.
• 58:11
  Rowan's the problem. He's the enemy.
• 58:13
  He's the villain. Yes.
• 58:14
  Lance is not even the villain. No, he was so I would.
• 58:16
  Cheat on her too? What?
• 58:23
  She's insufferable. I'm not.
• 58:24
  Disagreeing. That's why.
• 58:26
  No, she's insufferable. Fucking Ron knows.
• 58:29
  Lance knows. Jenny knows.
• 58:31
  Claire knows Even Nanny. Everyone's like.
• 58:34
  Had enough? You were right though.
• 58:37
  He's so convinced, keeping it casual.
• 58:39
  But the next one, He takes her to New York to meet her favorite
• 58:41
  author. Not only does he take her to New
• 58:45
  York to meet her favorite author, he helps her carry like
• 58:49
  fucking 20 books to go get signed.
• 58:51
  He's carrying a bag. He made sure every single book
• 58:54
  was in there to get signed. If you're that casual, you don't
• 58:59
  even know enough about that person to know who their
• 59:01
  favorite. You and not organizing with her
• 59:04
  sister? But also I feel like because
• 59:05
  he's so rich, this kind of is bare minimum.
• 59:07
  Maybe he's got these. Connections anyway, So he thinks
• 59:10
  he's putting 1% effort into the girl He fucks.
• 59:13
  She's like, he's going to propose.
• 59:16
  She knew it was bare minimum Okay.
• 59:19
  When they're in New York, she's running around New York Park.
• 59:22
  She wants to do the whole experience.
• 59:23
  He's pissy about it, forgetting that she's never left her house.
• 59:27
  She's poor, she's poor, she's never left her house.
• 59:30
  But she says something like, I'm cold and he goes, your boots
• 59:34
  weren't made for cold weather, but then gets pissed that she's
• 59:38
  cold. Yeah, but doesn't offer to buy
• 59:41
  her clothes. Yeah, where's the montage where
• 59:43
  they get all the free clothes? Why?
• 59:44
  Why wouldn't you go be like, Oh well, if we're going to walk
• 59:47
  around the park, we're going to go get you warmest shoes.
• 59:49
  Like you assumed her sister would pack properly for a
• 59:56
  fucking adult, not only a grown adult, but for a out of nowhere
• 1:00:00
  weather event in New York. And because apparently, it
• 1:00:03
  wasn't supposed to be snowing. And also he already knew that
• 1:00:06
  she packed badly because she was wearing the most dodgy outfit on
• 1:00:09
  the private plane and was embarrassed.
• 1:00:11
  Oh, not only that, she was wearing doughnut underwear that
• 1:00:14
  she hadn't worn since high school.
• 1:00:17
  Take the woman shopping. She's not that hard.
• 1:00:19
  I'm. Like, literally, just go get her
• 1:00:21
  a warmer coat and warmer boots The night before they even walk
• 1:00:25
  around the park. She was like and he put these in
• 1:00:27
  there. I haven't worn these since high
• 1:00:29
  school. That should have been a clue in
• 1:00:31
  that you need to go by her Fucking.
• 1:00:33
  But he's too. Dumb for that.
• 1:00:36
  Then he's mad. She gets sick like it's not his
• 1:00:38
  fault. I know.
• 1:00:39
  Just take the woman across the road to a fucking mall.
• 1:00:43
  Just get her. Fucking socks even.
• 1:00:45
  I know. Well, it's not even that hard.
• 1:00:47
  Just every ROM com has the scene where they're buying them all
• 1:00:51
  the fancy clothes. Why didn't they use that trope?
• 1:00:54
  But they used every other trope. It just doesn't make sense.
• 1:00:57
  But also there's no feeling worse than if you were hopping
• 1:01:00
  on a private plane and then all the staff are dressed up in
• 1:01:04
  their proper uniforms and that and you're rocking up in these
• 1:01:06
  track pants and oversized T-shirt.
• 1:01:09
  You look like a fucking mess. And then your so-called
• 1:01:12
  boyfriend is all dressed up. He's in a full suit everything.
• 1:01:15
  And he doesn't get why she's embarrassed, yeah.
• 1:01:18
  He's such a he could, he could have showed up two hours before
• 1:01:21
  and being like we're going to New York.
• 1:01:23
  At this time, not like just barged in.
• 1:01:25
  Yeah, I'm taking the hostage that trip is where he mentions
• 1:01:29
  the gala. And I was frothing out her mouth
• 1:01:31
  because I'm like, they better fucking, not because I thought
• 1:01:33
  he was going to buy her a dress. And how they always buy them
• 1:01:36
  dress. It was the opposite.
• 1:01:38
  He didn't fucking buy her normal clothes.
• 1:01:39
  And she didn't even exist. And.
• 1:01:41
  Then they didn't even go. They did the skating, not the
• 1:01:44
  park, the like skating rink thing in New York instead.
• 1:01:47
  And I'm like why even? Mention it.
• 1:01:48
  Why? Because he, I think he was
• 1:01:50
  prepping like you're we're doing this, you're so casual.
• 1:01:53
  Don't mention it. That she's going to events with
• 1:01:56
  you. Was this author just trying to
• 1:01:58
  put every single stupid trope in to raise my blood pressure
• 1:02:02
  because it worked? How you doing then?
• 1:02:05
  Badly. Blood pressure through the roof.
• 1:02:08
  The second I saw Gala, I thought I was fucking safe.
• 1:02:10
  It was chapter 40. Thought I was fucking safe.
• 1:02:16
  You can never escape the gala. Not her grown ass adult with the
• 1:02:21
  pin covered backpack. I know her friend was getting
• 1:02:23
  them every therapy session like it's a sentimental thing.
• 1:02:27
  She, and this is when they actually talk about therapy, I
• 1:02:30
  think he asked her in the New York apartment.
• 1:02:32
  Right. And she's just like, I was a
• 1:02:34
  little bit depressed after Lance and I started going to therapy.
• 1:02:38
  Fair enough. He like mansplained it to her,
• 1:02:40
  though. Yeah, and then immediately went
• 1:02:42
  on to like this tangent about his mum again.
• 1:02:45
  He didn't even like we've. We've heard it, mate.
• 1:02:47
  He didn't even acknowledge. Wow, Lance must have really
• 1:02:50
  fucked you up. He really thought like, she's
• 1:02:52
  getting a pin per therapy session and then now twice a
• 1:02:57
  year and he was like, maybe there's something more than
• 1:03:03
  Lance being a problem. But he didn't even ask her.
• 1:03:06
  He just segued into, oh great, I want to be able to talk about.
• 1:03:09
  And then have sex. Doesn't even go to therapy, but
• 1:03:12
  he could afford it a million times over.
• 1:03:15
  Yeah, Men never go to therapy. She can't afford it, but she's.
• 1:03:18
  Still going? What is with romance books and
• 1:03:20
  them having It's not even a heart to heart, it is literally
• 1:03:23
  a trauma dump. And then they have sex.
• 1:03:25
  I know, It's so sad. It's.
• 1:03:26
  Fair. But he wanted to know about the
• 1:03:28
  pins because he wanted to know more about her.
• 1:03:30
  It's not that he cared. No, he's like, oh.
• 1:03:32
  OK, cool. Now I know that I have that
• 1:03:34
  information on you. Yeah, he's like, really?
• 1:03:37
  Where is she getting the pins from?
• 1:03:38
  Another man. Yeah, that's all he needed to
• 1:03:40
  know. And he's like, oh, so I'm.
• 1:03:42
  Surprised. I'm surprised he's not scared of
• 1:03:45
  Claire. Yeah, because Claire is gay.
• 1:03:48
  I'm surprised he's not. True.
• 1:03:51
  Maybe down the track? He would be maybe, as you
• 1:03:54
  mentioned. She got sick when she was away.
• 1:03:56
  She got way sick though. Hell of me.
• 1:03:59
  And I was like, what? She must have been wearing
• 1:04:00
  fucking thongs in that snow. I'm surprised she still has
• 1:04:03
  toes. I'm.
• 1:04:04
  Surprised with how hard it went that direction because I was
• 1:04:07
  like, OK, what is this building up to?
• 1:04:10
  And then she's just in hospital practically dying for a whole
• 1:04:13
  week. She, like, passed out.
• 1:04:14
  Didn't know what day it was, no. She hit her head.
• 1:04:18
  Ohh. It took him three days.
• 1:04:19
  Apparently she was at his house for three days where she wasn't
• 1:04:22
  waking up and eating and he was like, oh, maybe I can call a
• 1:04:24
  doctor idiot. And then she hits her head.
• 1:04:28
  The doctor was like, she's going to need to go on the ambulance
• 1:04:31
  at this point. Yeah, literally.
• 1:04:32
  So she can't even keep her eyes open.
• 1:04:35
  Another thing he says right when she's sick, he goes, I drag her
• 1:04:40
  useless body into my arms. I'm like, that's not something
• 1:04:44
  you used to describe. Well.
• 1:04:46
  It technically was useless at the time.
• 1:04:48
  I mean, but he's it's not the first time he's called.
• 1:04:51
  She's a. Female.
• 1:04:52
  Emily, I swear there's another time he's called her useless in
• 1:04:56
  there, or she's called herself useless and I'm like, yeah.
• 1:05:00
  He probably would to her face. I wouldn't be surprised.
• 1:05:03
  He then calls himself her fiance to get in there, then upgrades
• 1:05:07
  her hospital room and pays for it all because she can't afford
• 1:05:10
  it. His fault too.
• 1:05:12
  Yeah, he's fucking. That would in itself.
• 1:05:14
  I could not date a man. That is the reason why my
• 1:05:17
  company cannot give me health benefits.
• 1:05:20
  Exactly. Then he sits with her all week,
• 1:05:22
  ignoring her. It's.
• 1:05:25
  I. I was confused because they do
• 1:05:27
  break up here. Yeah, I didn't even know how
• 1:05:30
  that happened. So she's in there for, I think a
• 1:05:32
  week passed out and then she's in there for a couple of days,
• 1:05:34
  not passed out the entire time. She was not passed out.
• 1:05:38
  He was ignoring the shit out of her.
• 1:05:40
  He would talk to our family just to ignore the shit out of her.
• 1:05:43
  And she was like, what's the problem?
• 1:05:45
  What is going on? And he's like, Oh no, it's fine.
• 1:05:48
  And then he's having like this full go at a this is your fault.
• 1:05:52
  I didn't want to go in the park. He goes, Love was never an
• 1:05:56
  option. If I made you believe otherwise,
• 1:05:58
  I apologize. I would never subject you to
• 1:06:00
  that kind of misbelief when I'm moving back to Chicago.
• 1:06:02
  Soon you ain't doing, and he wasn't even.
• 1:06:06
  Telling her that he was moving. Not only that, right before this
• 1:06:11
  moment, going back to New York, he pretty much confesses, liking
• 1:06:15
  her and loving her in his own weird way.
• 1:06:17
  And she even in her head goes, I think this is the closest I'm
• 1:06:20
  going to get to his feelings. But then she got sick.
• 1:06:23
  To be fair, she's now useless. She's now useless.
• 1:06:27
  How can you put babies in that? She clearly.
• 1:06:30
  Hasn't got a good immune system to pass on to the next.
• 1:06:33
  Generation you can't be that traumatized from your mum having
• 1:06:35
  cancer that you would dump someone.
• 1:06:37
  It's a flu, she'll be fine. And dumping someone when they're
• 1:06:41
  in a hospital bed. Failed at.
• 1:06:43
  That point? Just don't even upgrade it.
• 1:06:45
  Not only a piece of shit. He dumps her.
• 1:06:48
  She's like, I want to pay for this all myself because he made
• 1:06:50
  her feel like he was obligated, like she trapped him into it.
• 1:06:55
  He comes back and kisses her on the head and was like, you
• 1:06:57
  deserve the well. What What is it?
• 1:07:01
  What do you want? I.
• 1:07:02
  Literally don't even know at that point.
• 1:07:03
  I was just like, yelling at the book.
• 1:07:05
  I just wanted to throw it. OK, so the rest of this book,
• 1:07:08
  look, it wasn't going great to begin with, but the rest of the
• 1:07:11
  book was so on autopilot he was so bad.
• 1:07:17
  And then this end bit once she started ignoring him because
• 1:07:20
  obviously they broke up and then he started getting his feelings
• 1:07:23
  back, of course. Because he's just like it was
• 1:07:25
  immediately he left the room and he was like, what the word
• 1:07:29
  Fucking done. He goes and stalks Annie at her
• 1:07:31
  job to get the team. And the poor?
• 1:07:35
  Girl is so. Annie is so horrified because
• 1:07:38
  there's a bit in there. He goes, I didn't mean to hurt
• 1:07:41
  you too. And she goes, I helped you hurt
• 1:07:43
  her. How fucking deranged is this
• 1:07:46
  man? Annie was on your team day one,
• 1:07:49
  setting you up with dates, everything.
• 1:07:51
  And you? Giving him the inside info.
• 1:07:53
  Yeah. And he's just like, yeah.
• 1:07:56
  So there was a whole bunch of just business meetings up there.
• 1:07:59
  There was one really stupid bit after that, and it was when he
• 1:08:03
  brought a gingerbread house. He goes, I brought an activity
• 1:08:07
  to convince you to give me an hour to talk.
• 1:08:10
  And he's like sitting there. He's like, I even looked it up
• 1:08:12
  and I thought we could make our own.
• 1:08:13
  I see. And she's like.
• 1:08:15
  Fucking you want to be near you? She's.
• 1:08:16
  Like you're that fucking delusional and slams the door in
• 1:08:19
  his face. Good, he a little activity.
• 1:08:22
  She's not a child. I don't know where he gets the
• 1:08:25
  audacity. This is all building up to the
• 1:08:27
  end, which I never got from the beginning because they kind of
• 1:08:30
  went harder towards the end, which was this whole idea that
• 1:08:32
  he needs to get these votes, Yes, to stay on the board or to
• 1:08:36
  be the CEO, basically. And then she's kind of
• 1:08:38
  realizing, oh, maybe he just was manipulating me because I'm an
• 1:08:41
  employee and I'm going to vote for him sort of thing, and I'm
• 1:08:45
  going to help him look good, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:08:46
  Yeah. That's way more likely than her
• 1:08:49
  trying to sabotage him. Yeah, it was.
• 1:08:52
  It took a full swing. But also why did this vote only
• 1:08:54
  matter till the end? He never cared about this job.
• 1:08:57
  No, he didn't want it. He just wanted his shares.
• 1:09:00
  And that was the whole point. So she does her presentation
• 1:09:02
  about what she would do to fix the whole park, which is to make
• 1:09:06
  it accessible, blah blah. Which makes sense.
• 1:09:09
  Yep. But a customer experience.
• 1:09:11
  Yeah, yeah, everyone's like, yay, great presentation.
• 1:09:13
  He fucking goes up there, Makes this huge boring speech
• 1:09:19
  presentation. I felt like I was in the room
• 1:09:21
  with him, his horrible, and he suddenly cares about employee
• 1:09:25
  satisfaction, He says He's been talking to employees all year.
• 1:09:29
  You've been boning once. Who have you been talking to?
• 1:09:34
  You don't know the names of anyone in this building.
• 1:09:36
  Yeah. At the start he was bragging
• 1:09:39
  about how shit he treats workers.
• 1:09:41
  I can't be pathetic. I treat them like shit.
• 1:09:43
  I make. Them.
• 1:09:44
  And I'm ruthless and my daddy hates.
• 1:09:46
  Me, I'm ruthless. And I cut all their health
• 1:09:48
  benefits. It took one guy saying he did
• 1:09:51
  not care about his job because he was dying anyway for him to
• 1:09:54
  get it. Actually, it wasn't even that
• 1:09:56
  Martha was fucking limping on her way to a second job.
• 1:09:59
  His fucking assistant was limping to a second job and
• 1:10:03
  that's when he was like, oh, maybe I should look into.
• 1:10:06
  It maybe I should look at the slightly less poverty.
• 1:10:10
  He sent her a bonus, the $10,000 bonus, and it's like she doesn't
• 1:10:14
  want a bonus. She wants a livable wage, You
• 1:10:17
  Jackass. She literally, she doesn't.
• 1:10:20
  She was like, I need to make it to work on time because I'm too
• 1:10:24
  old and I don't get as many tips I'm like.
• 1:10:28
  But why do they have to be so far up his ass for him to
• 1:10:30
  realize they're a human being? Why does he wait until these
• 1:10:33
  people? How much money are they on?
• 1:10:35
  Like fucking $2.00 an hour. Literally.
• 1:10:38
  But you know the worst part of his speech?
• 1:10:39
  Boringness aside, he uses a picture of Arnie on the
• 1:10:43
  PowerPoint presentation. And she just starts crying.
• 1:10:47
  As a proper full manipulation. No, he does.
• 1:10:49
  Because you're telling me there's not another, any other
• 1:10:53
  disabled person at that park? That is fucked up, and Arnie
• 1:10:57
  probably wouldn't have agreed to have been put on the PowerPoint
• 1:11:00
  because she was not. And then Randy was put on the
• 1:11:02
  PowerPoint too, for his cancer. Poor man.
• 1:11:06
  Rowan's dad, who's been made out to be the actual villain this
• 1:11:09
  whole time, pops in at the end and goes, You did a good job,
• 1:11:11
  son, and then fucking leaves. I actually, I actually.
• 1:11:14
  Do not understand his father because he's a raging asshole
• 1:11:18
  the entire time. And then Azara said like, he's
• 1:11:21
  tapping, like he's giving him praise while he's.
• 1:11:24
  I'm like, what is it? Does he fucking hate him or?
• 1:11:26
  Does. I don't think he does.
• 1:11:27
  I think Rowan's perception is that Dad hates him so much, but
• 1:11:30
  he just didn't care. Yeah.
• 1:11:32
  I don't think the dad gives a shit.
• 1:11:33
  He literally says you did well at the end and then fucks off
• 1:11:36
  and is a non event. He's a non event the entire
• 1:11:39
  time, so. What was even the point?
• 1:11:41
  He didn't even need to be there. Well.
• 1:11:42
  He asked his dad at some point out there, and he's like, did
• 1:11:46
  you even love my mom? Did you?
• 1:11:48
  And I'm like, are you kidding? Did he love your mom?
• 1:11:53
  I'm like, every bit of this book.
• 1:11:55
  When you mentioned your dad, even in the most foul way, he's
• 1:11:58
  so obsessed with your mom. Fucking idiot your dad.
• 1:12:01
  If he loves you, that's what you want to find.
• 1:12:03
  Out. Oh my God.
• 1:12:04
  That's why you're so repressed. You know, what?
• 1:12:07
  If the dad kept calling him the weakest son, I'm like, yeah, he
• 1:12:11
  does fucking bowling. It makes sense at this point.
• 1:12:13
  The weakest son. He can't even eat fucking
• 1:12:17
  anything or breathe in air without having indigestion
• 1:12:20
  tablets. Honestly, he's got IBS.
• 1:12:22
  He's got an impacted colon. He needs Tums to survive.
• 1:12:25
  When he cries, when holding pencils honestly.
• 1:12:28
  Literally, he's one stiff wind away from passing away.
• 1:12:33
  He's anemic, the blood. Pressure's low.
• 1:12:34
  Sorry. Got sick.
• 1:12:36
  How did he not get sick? He can't tell me he's not
• 1:12:39
  deodrated and allergic to water at this point.
• 1:12:42
  Once she had, I guess, listened to his stupid speech, Her take
• 1:12:47
  from the whole thing was, I have to protect this man's heart from
• 1:12:52
  the world. What?
• 1:12:56
  Nothing bad has really happened to him on purpose?
• 1:12:59
  Nothing. Bad is going to happen to this
• 1:13:01
  man. He is fine.
• 1:13:03
  And why do they both and Zara does this as well?
• 1:13:06
  They both act like him. Being a complete selfish,
• 1:13:10
  sociopathic prick is like a cutesy quirk.
• 1:13:15
  Oh, that's. What makes Rowan him?
• 1:13:17
  He's just a fucking idiot. Straight up.
• 1:13:20
  Possible. If you ever put me in a room
• 1:13:23
  with this man, it'd be on site. I'd be cackling.
• 1:13:26
  I yeah, you would only have to tell me two things and I
• 1:13:31
  literally would be on the floor. He honestly makes Christian Grey
• 1:13:35
  seem warm and fuzzy. No, he honestly makes Christian
• 1:13:39
  Grey not cringy, which is the problem.
• 1:13:42
  If we're taking Christian Grey seriously.
• 1:13:44
  That's the point if we're taking him seriously, because honestly,
• 1:13:46
  there's a point movie, We'll go movie and we'll not go book.
• 1:13:49
  I don't remember a single thing about the book, but there's a
• 1:13:51
  point where he's like, I'm 50 Shades of fucked up.
• 1:13:54
  I would much rather hear that on repeat than anything this single
• 1:13:58
  man could give me. Exactly.
• 1:13:59
  I'd be like Modern Poet snaps for Christian Grey.
• 1:14:04
  Literally though. And then Rowan just enters the
• 1:14:06
  room and I'm like. Rolling into some room and he's
• 1:14:09
  just like. OK, I would rather be in jail.
• 1:14:14
  Dude, so guess what we got this time instead of the anal to
• 1:14:20
  love. Pipeline, I'm really surprised
• 1:14:22
  we didn't get it, I guess. What we got?
• 1:14:24
  Instead, what did we get? It's.
• 1:14:25
  Equally as bad, it is the no condom to love Pipeline.
• 1:14:29
  I knew it, yeah. That's where I was like.
• 1:14:32
  Because he didn't use one. No, he didn't.
• 1:14:35
  You're. Sneaky.
• 1:14:37
  Yuck. Though condoms was such a big
• 1:14:40
  deal for that man, she's on the bar.
• 1:14:42
  But he wouldn't trust that she's actually on the bar.
• 1:14:44
  Yeah, true. She's trying to trap him and his
• 1:14:47
  magical semen. How did she keep forgiving him?
• 1:14:52
  I don't understand because. He didn't ever reassure her he
• 1:14:55
  would be that guy saying the most heinous vows to you up at
• 1:14:59
  the altar in front of everyone and he would not be taking it
• 1:15:02
  back. No, there is so many things.
• 1:15:04
  But he would just be like you are a useless pathetic.
• 1:15:08
  Little. Girl, female.
• 1:15:10
  And the only reason why I'm taking you off the market is so
• 1:15:12
  that no one else can have your wig past genetics.
• 1:15:18
  But he would say that straight faced.
• 1:15:21
  And she would be frothing. She would be.
• 1:15:23
  She would be on the floor, do you think?
• 1:15:25
  It's because our brain's not developed.
• 1:15:27
  She's 23. It makes sense of tracks,
• 1:15:29
  honestly at this point. Like he's. 30.
• 1:15:32
  Plus, right, And he's still his brain is not developed.
• 1:15:35
  No. There's not a single developed
• 1:15:38
  part of that cranium out. Of all of this, what is he
• 1:15:41
  providing except for money? Not a single thing.
• 1:15:44
  He doesn't have personality. He.
• 1:15:47
  Does he is not nice to you? There's a point where they're
• 1:15:50
  talking about her accidentally passing out at work and he was
• 1:15:53
  like, I don't have a single fuck.
• 1:15:55
  It's a bare minimum. I just that would have been the
• 1:16:01
  HR moment. Are you kidding?
• 1:16:02
  I would have been like, this man's abusing me.
• 1:16:04
  He wants me to hit my head so he can stop paying my wage.
• 1:16:09
  There's no job security. She must really love that wrap
• 1:16:13
  around balcony, because that's the only.
• 1:16:14
  Thing the only good quality he has.
• 1:16:17
  And it you know what? It makes sense.
• 1:16:19
  Because when you go into the extended epilogue, she's on that
• 1:16:23
  wrap around watching fireworks pregnant with baby #2.
• 1:16:29
  The epilogue was 100. Percent trash, obviously.
• 1:16:31
  The epilogue or the extended epilogue?
• 1:16:33
  Both. I'm like how exciting they
• 1:16:36
  finally built the nebula. Don't bring babies into this.
• 1:16:41
  And she's pregnant. I.
• 1:16:43
  Don't know. Just don't.
• 1:16:44
  Bring At least it was three years later.
• 1:16:46
  A lot of the time when we get an epilogue and they're pregnant,
• 1:16:48
  it's like 6 months later and I'm like, yeah, true.
• 1:16:52
  How's she willingly attracted to this man?
• 1:16:54
  That's what I don't understand. She fully lied to get close to
• 1:16:58
  her, and she just never brings it up ever again, he.
• 1:17:01
  Lies, but he's a varsity bowler, He.
• 1:17:04
  Crawls on his knees. He's a victim.
• 1:17:07
  He Well, he sits there chewing on a packet of fucking Tums.
• 1:17:12
  Everything would give me the ick.
• 1:17:14
  He calls himself a ruthless businessman.
• 1:17:16
  Like I. Don't Where's ruthless?
• 1:17:18
  He thinks it's cool to fire people.
• 1:17:20
  He thinks it's cool for them to be on a crappy medical plan.
• 1:17:24
  There's a bit where he goes weak.
• 1:17:25
  I fire everyone. Pathetic.
• 1:17:27
  I cut their health plans and I'm like, who's the weak and
• 1:17:30
  pathetic one because your dad manipulated you into something
• 1:17:34
  stupid? The only thing he did halfway
• 1:17:37
  decent was sending Lance to China, but he did it for himself
• 1:17:42
  so that he would never have to see him.
• 1:17:43
  It wasn't even for Zara. Yep.
• 1:17:46
  There's nothing of. Course, he gets all the votes.
• 1:17:48
  He gets his company. She gets pregnant.
• 1:17:52
  They're married. I really thought it'd be
• 1:17:55
  something more about the contract than that.
• 1:17:57
  Considering the only fine print thing that came up was that she
• 1:18:01
  had to have an exit interview. Yeah, so that he could
• 1:18:04
  manipulate her back. It was good when she had a
• 1:18:06
  backbone when they broke up, but then she just folded.
• 1:18:09
  She. Fucking essentially ruined her
• 1:18:12
  career. Twice.
• 1:18:14
  Yeah, because who cares? She's just coming.
• 1:18:16
  She. Quit her job.
• 1:18:16
  She quit her dream job because of him?
• 1:18:20
  Yeah. One thing about this book and
• 1:18:22
  I'm look, I'm always mad, so it's fine.
• 1:18:24
  Honestly, I don't. I don't understand a single
• 1:18:28
  reason to like this myth, so I get it.
• 1:18:32
  There was too many tropes. There's too much recycled.
• 1:18:34
  This could be lifted from any book and mashed together.
• 1:18:37
  It's. I feel like we just need to
• 1:18:40
  accept that now. I always want a hard swing and
• 1:18:43
  love it for just how stupid it was.
• 1:18:46
  It's so hard, hey, But it's hard to love it because you have so
• 1:18:49
  hard potential. Yeah.
• 1:18:50
  Yeah. You're in Disneyland, bitch.
• 1:18:53
  There wasn't a proposal in Disneyland at the Ending Fucking
• 1:18:56
  Duck. I am pissed that we missed.
• 1:18:58
  We were robbed. We were robbed of that.
• 1:19:01
  If you're going. To give me If you're going to
• 1:19:02
  give me anything in the epilogue, I do not care.
• 1:19:05
  They opened a fucking display. No, you could have gave me a
• 1:19:10
  year epilogue, and then you could have given me three years
• 1:19:12
  later with her being pregnant. So the year should have been
• 1:19:15
  some whimsical fucking dreamland proposal.
• 1:19:18
  Or. Anytime throughout the book it
• 1:19:21
  could have been they went night time like you said, closed down,
• 1:19:24
  exclusive, looked up at the fireworks and then were kissing.
• 1:19:26
  In the extended epilogue, he closes down a teacup area for
• 1:19:31
  him in East Florida to have, like, a little teacup lunch.
• 1:19:34
  Why couldn't you do that for the girl you're obsessed with?
• 1:19:38
  I don't know so much power. So little thought.
• 1:19:42
  So what should we rate this out of knee scriptures.
• 1:19:47
  Knee. Scriptures.
• 1:19:48
  That's what I was thinking I was trying to think of.
• 1:19:49
  A word. This is the most cringy part of
• 1:19:51
  the whole book. Yeah.
• 1:19:52
  So anyway, I'm going to be real controversial and give it zero
• 1:19:55
  because. Honestly, I didn't.
• 1:19:57
  Have anything? Honestly, I'm a give it a one
• 1:20:00
  for the pure entertainment of hating this man, Yes.
• 1:20:04
  But why was every conversation in a fucking office or sitting
• 1:20:08
  on a floor when we've got the entire of Disneyland?
• 1:20:11
  Yes, huh. Yeah, it was rough.
• 1:20:14
  And I don't know if I'm being extra bitchy, but at least if
• 1:20:16
  the sex scenes were slapping I would have given it no but.
• 1:20:18
  The thing is, they weren't. Because I mean.
• 1:20:20
  At least turn it into porn at this point.
• 1:20:22
  Did you know what though? I would not read this again.
• 1:20:25
  No, But I was entertained, just not in a good way.
• 1:20:29
  So that's it. Thanks for joining us on Lose
• 1:20:32
  the Plot with Carla and Emily. Don't forget to rate US five
• 1:20:35
  stars and subscribe. If you enjoyed Slide into our
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