Latest / The Career Mentor Podcast with Fexingo: Finding Mentors, Sponsors, and Career Advisors / How to Find a Mentor Through Industry Conferences
Transcript
- Lucas: Luna, I want to talk about a specific place where mentorship happens that we haven't really covered yet — industry conferences. Luna: Oh interesting. Because a lot of people go to conferences and come back with a stack of business cards and zero actual relationships. I've been there. Lucas: Exactly. And that's the gap. A 2025 survey from the Conference Board found that professionals who attended at least two conferences per year were twice as likely to report having an active mentor — 67 percent versus 34 percent for non-attendees. But here's the kicker: the people who got mentors didn't just show up. They had a specific approach. Luna: So what did they do differently? Lucas: Let me give you a concrete case. A marketing professional I know — mid-career, about eight years in — went to a single industry conference and came out with three mentor relationships that lasted years. She didn't ask anyone 'will you be my mentor' — that's a recipe for awkward silence. Instead, she did three things. First, she pre-researched every speaker she wanted to meet. Luna: That sounds obvious but I bet most people don't do it. Lucas: Most don't. She read their recent articles, looked at their session abstracts, and she prepared one specific 'curiosity question' for each. Not a generic 'what advice do you have for someone like me' — something like 'in your talk you mentioned the shift to zero-party data — how did your team decide which data points to prioritize?' That question shows you actually listened. Luna: That's smart. It's respectful of their time and it demonstrates genuine interest. Lucas: Right. Second, after the talk she'd approach them during the hallway transition, not during Q&A where fifty people are waiting. She'd say 'I loved your point about X — I had a question about how you operationalized that' — and if the conversation went well, she'd ask for a 15-minute follow-up call, not an ongoing mentorship. That's a low-friction ask. Luna: And the third thing? Lucas: Follow-up within 24 hours. She'd send a LinkedIn request with a note referencing something specific from their conversation — 'I really appreciated your insight on prioritization frameworks — here's a quick article I thought you might find interesting based on what we discussed.' Not a templated 'great meeting you'. Luna: I love that. It turns a hallway chat into a genuine connection. And over time, that can evolve into a mentor relationship naturally. Lucas: Exactly. And that's the key — you're not asking for mentorship in the first conversation. You're planting a seed. The mentorship grows out of repeated, value-added interactions. Luna: If today was worth a coffee to you, that's the link — buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo. We keep this podcast ad-free because of listeners like you, and it helps us keep digging into these practical strategies. Lucas: Yeah, honestly, if you've gotten something out of our episodes, that's the place. And it really does make a difference — it lets us keep the show exactly as it is, no sponsors, no interruptions. Luna: So back to conferences — what about people who find conferences overwhelming? Introverts, remote workers who aren't used to large in-person events? Lucas: Great question. The same marketing professional I mentioned actually describes herself as an introvert. She told me she'd pick one or two speakers per day to target, and she'd arrive early to sessions to get a seat near the front, where she could catch the speaker as they stepped off stage. That's a manageable goal — you're not trying to network with everyone. Luna: So the key is to go in with a plan, not a vague hope of 'meeting people'. Lucas: Absolutely. And for remote workers, there's a growing trend of virtual conferences — but I'd argue the same principles apply. Pre-research, prepare questions, and follow up with a personalized message referencing the session. Some platforms even have virtual networking lounges where you can have one-on-one video chats. Use those. Luna: What about conferences that are huge — like five thousand attendees? Isn't it harder to stand out? Lucas: Ironically, smaller conferences are often better for mentorship. The Conference Board data showed that attendees at conferences with fewer than 500 participants had a 73 percent mentor acquisition rate, versus 41 percent at events over 2,000. So if you can, choose a niche conference in your field rather than the giant industry expo. Luna: That makes sense — more opportunity for real conversation. Lucas: Exactly. And even at big conferences, you can find smaller breakouts or roundtables. That's where you get the intimate setting. Also, don't overlook the exhibitor hall — small vendors often have senior people who are more accessible than keynote speakers. Luna: What about after the conference? How do you maintain the connection so it actually becomes mentorship? Lucas: This is where most people drop the ball. The follow-up call she requested — she'd prepare for it like a mini meeting. She'd come with three specific topics she wanted input on, and she'd make sure to offer something in return — maybe a connection to someone in her network, or a resource. That reciprocity is crucial. Luna: So it's not a one-way ask. You're building a relationship. Lucas: Exactly. And over time, if you consistently add value, that person starts to think of you as a promising professional they want to invest in. That's when the unofficial mentor relationship kicks in. Luna: Do you have an example of what that looked like in practice? Lucas: She told me about one of the speakers she approached. She followed up with a link to a case study that related to his talk. He replied with a thoughtful comment. A few weeks later, she sent him a question about a project she was working on. He gave advice. After about six months, she asked if he'd be open to a quarterly call. He said yes. Now they talk every quarter, and he's been a reference for her. Luna: That's a beautiful progression. It started with a single conference and a single well-crafted question. Lucas: Exactly. And she didn't need a formal program or a title. She just needed a strategy and the courage to start the conversation. Luna: So for our listeners, what's the one takeaway? If you have an upcoming conference, what should you do tonight to prepare? Lucas: Pull up the speaker list. Pick three people whose work genuinely interests you. Read something they've written or watch a past talk. Write down one specific question that shows you've done your homework. That's your starting point. And then when you're at the event, target them. One good conversation is worth more than a hundred handshakes. Luna: And if you're not going to a conference anytime soon, do the same thing with webinars or virtual summits. The same principle applies. Lucas: Great point. The medium doesn't matter as much as the intentionality. So next time you register for an event, whether it's in person or online, think of it as a mentorship opportunity, not just a learning one. Luna: I like that reframe. I think a lot of people go to conferences to learn from the stage, but the real learning often happens in the hallway. Lucas: Or in the virtual breakout room. And with a little prep, you can turn that hallway moment into a relationship that lasts years. Luna: Thanks, Lucas. That's a really actionable episode. Lucas: Thanks, Luna. And to our listeners — go ahead and try it. Pick one conference, one speaker, one question. See where it leads.