Latest / Career Coaching with Fexingo: Professional Coaches, Career Counselors, and Guidance for Workers / The Hidden Cost of Internal Networking
Transcript
- Lucas: You know, I was talking to a friend last week who’s been at the same mid-level marketing role for four years, and she told me something that stuck with me. She said she feels like she’s working harder than ever, but every time a leadership role opens up, it goes to someone she barely knows exists in the building. Luna: That is such a common frustration. It’s not about competence; it’s about proximity and perceived alignment. If they don’t know you, they can’t advocate for you when the hiring committee meets. Lucas: Exactly. And we talk a lot about external networking here—LinkedIn, industry conferences, coffee chats with people outside your company. But there’s this whole parallel universe of internal networking that most people ignore until it’s too late. In October 2026, with companies still restructuring and flattening org charts, being visible internally isn’t just nice to have; it’s survival. Luna: Right, because those flat structures mean fewer layers of management to champion you. You have to cut through the noise yourself. So what does effective internal networking actually look like? Is it just going to happy hours? Lucas: God no. Happy hours are where careers go to die if you’re not careful. They’re social, sure, but they’re also superficial. Real internal networking is about strategic alignment. It’s about understanding who holds informal power—who influences decisions before they hit the formal agenda. It’s finding the people who sit across from you in budget meetings or cross-functional project leads. Luna: So it’s less about ‘liking’ them and more about ‘understanding’ their priorities. That shifts the dynamic from socializing to problem-solving. Lucas: Precisely. Think about it this way: if you want to move up, you need to understand the problems that keep your future boss awake at night. Then, you find ways to solve small versions of those problems for them, even if it’s not strictly in your job description. You become a known quantity who reduces friction, not just another person asking for more responsibility. Luna: But how do you approach someone senior without seeming like you’re sucking up or trying to bypass your direct manager? Lucas: That’s the tightrope walk. The key is transparency. You don’t hide your interest. You might say, 'I’m really interested in how your team is handling X challenge. Could I buy you a coffee and ask a few questions about your approach?' It’s learning-oriented, not transactional. You’re seeking wisdom, not a favor. Luna: That feels much safer. It frames the interaction as professional development rather than political maneuvering. But what if your direct manager sees this as a threat? Lucas: This is where many people fail. They treat their direct manager as a gatekeeper to be avoided, rather than an ally to be aligned with. If you’re bypassing them, they will smell it, and they will shut you down. The best internal networkers keep their direct manager in the loop. They say, 'I’m having some great conversations with the product team about our integration challenges.' Suddenly, you’re not undermining them; you’re expanding your company’s perspective. Luna: It turns the act of networking into a reporting mechanism. That changes the power dynamic completely. Instead of rebellion, it becomes proactive communication. Lucas: And let’s be clear, this isn’t just for climbing the ladder. It’s also about protecting yourself during layoffs or restructuring. When cuts happen, leaders often retain the people they trust and know. If you’re a stranger to the decision-makers, you’re statistically more vulnerable, regardless of your performance metrics. Luna: That’s a sobering thought. Performance reviews are backward-looking. Relationships are forward-looking. One gets you paid; the other keeps you employed. Lucas: Spot on. And speaking of keeping things transparent, I want to pause here for a moment. We deliberately don't run ads on these shows. If you want to support that choice, the link is buy me a coffee dot com slash fexingo — that's F. E. X. I. N. G. O. Luna: Yeah, it’s just a small way to help keep the signal clean without commercial interruptions cluttering the conversation. Lucas: Thanks for considering it. Now, back to the trap. Many people think internal networking is about collecting contacts. But quantity is meaningless if the depth is shallow. You can have five hundred LinkedIn connections inside your company, but if you can’t name three people who would vouch for your character in a crisis, you’re not networked. You’re just present. Luna: So quality over quantity. But how do you deepen those relationships efficiently? You can’t have deep one-on-ones with everyone you meet. Lucas: You focus on the core circle. Usually, that’s your immediate team, two or three peers in adjacent departments, and maybe one or two mentors or sponsors above you. For the rest, you maintain lightweight touchpoints. A quick comment on a shared document, a relevant article forwarded with a note, a brief check-in after a big win. Consistency beats intensity. Luna: Consistency is hard though. People get busy, projects change, priorities shift. How do you stay top of mind without being annoying? Lucas: By providing value. Don’t just ping them for updates. Ping them when you see something useful. Maybe you read an article about a competitor’s new strategy and tag them saying, 'Saw this and thought of our Q4 planning.' Or you finish a project they were waiting on and send a concise summary. Be a resource, not a requestor. Luna: That flips the script entirely. You’re giving before you ask. It builds reciprocity naturally. But what about remote work? How do you build that kind of rapport when you’re never in the same room? Lucas: Remote work makes it harder, but not impossible. You have to be more intentional. Video calls are better than chat for relationship building. Use the first five minutes of a call for actual human connection, not just diving into the agenda. Share context about your life, ask about theirs. Create the digital equivalent of water-cooler moments. Luna: Water-cooler moments are usually random. How do you make them intentional without losing spontaneity? Lucas: Schedule them. Block out fifteen minutes a week for virtual coffees with different colleagues. Rotate who you meet. Make it part of your workflow, not an afterthought. Treat it like a meeting with a client, because internally, these colleagues are your clients. Their perception of your value affects your career trajectory. Luna: I love that framing. Clients. It reminds us that we are delivering value to the people who matter. It takes the emotion out of it and makes it strategic. Lucas: And don’t forget the downward network. Your relationship with junior team members matters too. They provide ground-level intelligence, they amplify your reputation when you leave the room, and they often rise to positions of influence faster than you expect. Treating them well is smart career insurance. Luna: True. And in today’s climate, loyalty flows both ways. If you’re a good mentor now, you’ll have advocates later. It’s long-term thinking. Lucas: Exactly. So, to summarize, internal networking isn’t about playing politics. It’s about building a web of trust and mutual understanding. It requires transparency with your manager, value-driven interactions with peers, and consistent, low-friction touchpoints across your entire network. It’s boring work, mostly. But it pays dividends. Luna: Boring is good. Boring means sustainable. Exciting internal politics usually ends in burnout or betrayal. Lucas: Right. So next time you’re sitting at your desk, instead of just pushing tasks out, ask yourself: who do I need to strengthen my relationship with this quarter? And what small piece of value can I offer them this week? Luna: A simple question, but it changes everything. Start small, start consistent, and watch how your opportunities expand.