Latest / Pete Vs Anxiety!!!!! / The Truth About Growing a Business: It’s NOT About Working 24/7
Transcript
- peter AI: Welcome into the Voice of the Voiceless, a podcast where your story matters. Join Pete and Maddie as they welcome new voice each week. Who will be the next voice? I ⁓ we're about to find out. And by saying s Pete "Da Common Denominator": Welcome into another episode of Voice of the Voices, and guess who has returned? Maddie, say hi to everybody. Tell everybody you missed everyone. Maddie Andrews: I'm back. I missed you Pete "Da Common Denominator": And our guest today is Misty Dane Smith. Misty, welcome in. How are you? Misty Dane Smith: Wonderful. I'm sorry, I did I did type my name wrong. It's Misty Don Smith. Sorry about that. I was like, Jane, ⁓ where'd where did that come from? I'm awake this morning, I promise. Or afternoon. Whatever wherever you're at. Pete "Da Common Denominator": I was like, at least I'm not messing this up. So Misty ⁓ Maddie Andrews: That's okay. It's alright, it's alright. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Well, Missy, go ahead and tell everybody little more about yourself. Maddie Andrews: You Misty Dane Smith: Well, I am a beauty ⁓ entrepreneur consultant. So I help beauty entrepreneurs find profit leaks in their business and optimize what they already have running and going and find what they need, kind of plug them in to places where they're lacking. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Sounds really interesting. ⁓ don't know anything about that stuff, so I'm sorry if I have no comments on that. So ⁓ Maddie Andrews: Hehehehehe Misty Dane Smith: It it's basically wraps around any kind of service provider. It's it's kind of the same stuff, but I just focus more on the beauty world because that's where I've been for the last 22 years. So Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Awesome. Well, Missy, why don't you tell me a little more about your story? Misty Dane Smith: Well, I am a ⁓ mom. I gave birth to four children and I just realized that with all these children I needed something to do where I could control my hours and entering the beauty world was was that. I could go in and work a few hours and then go home and deal with kids and but now I am remarried and I have seven children. So we have a a big household. but during my progression and my career I just, you know I decided just doing hair wasn't enough. And so I decided I wanted to help other beauty entrepreneurs 'cause we are trained in our skill and we master our skill. We take all these certifications every year. We have to renew and have more education. But nobody teaches us how to run a business. And so we get kind of lost out there because our brains are more arts and creative, not, you know, money, finances, budgeting, s you know, all these structures and s and stuff, systems that we have to put in place. So it's a big leap for us to go into and a lot of us don't realize it. We're like, why why is my business suffering? And we can't see it because our brains are not made to do those things. So ⁓ when I figured that out, I was like, okay, I wanna help other people for try to prevent them from doing the things and the troubles that I had. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah, hey Maddie Andrews: How's your mental health during all that? Like you're raising all these kids, you're starting a business, like how did you sustain all that? Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, it it was hard, you know, looking back now I can see it was ⁓ living and just trying to sacrifice I trying to survive, survival mode. ⁓ you know, you just I just did. I just pushed through and was like, ⁓ I just need to figure this out and make it work and If I hit a wall or a a speed bump, I was looking okay, we won't do that again. How can I make sure to fix this, alter my where I'm going and how I'm doing it and and make it better? So ⁓ there was a lot of learning curves. there's a lot of things that I teach people now to how to prevent that. One is is mentorship in any kind of entrepreneur business in life in general. We I think everybody should have a mentor. ⁓ it just helps ⁓ keep you focused, keep You're in a line, it helps you get there faster, costes you less money, less heartache, right? Maddie Andrews: So how would you mentor somebody who say is trying to start a business, they're burnt out, and their mental health is suffering, maybe they're starting to have a lot of anxiety or depression, maybe some panic attacks, how would you handle that? Misty Dane Smith: Well, that is one of the things that I help my clients with is learning how to build a business around their life. So what we do is break down what do you want your life to look like? And then we're gonna build a business that supports that life. But if you're already in a place of mental illness or just not doing well, w whatever the case may be, we'll just put in a big vet. You need to think about you first because you're not going to be a good business owner. You're not gonna be a good boss, you're not gonna be a good wife or parent if you're not paying attention to you. Like you are number one. You need time to recharge because we are energy beings, right? We're like batteries, but we only have so much capacity and we keep going and going and going and going, we are gonna run out. And that's when we we hit rock bottom is when we start having problems. So if you're not replenishing your battery, if you're not taking a day off away from your phone, away from work, away from whatever that looks like to think about yourself, it's gonna reflect in your work, in your business. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Misty Dane Smith: your life because you're not able to provide your hunt 100% to all of those things. So whatever those mental health days look like to you, if it's just not be on the phone or maybe you go to the small or maybe you just Go for a walk, you know, maybe you do yoga, whatever it looks like for you. You know, some people it's simple, sometimes it's bigger for some people. ⁓ I'm I'm a big, I want to take two vacations a year. So I implement that into my business, you know, like it will support that financially, it will support it, me not being there. Like I structure my business to support the way I want my life to work. And ⁓ when you go about it that way, it's kind of a a reverse, right? And we don't think that way. We just go, we I need to find the time, I need to find the money. And it's like you just don't find it sometimes. You have to plan ahead. and that's where structure and systems come into play. But yes, it starts with you listening to yourself and giving yourself the time you need to recharge. Pete "Da Common Denominator": I love it. I absolutely love it as a big mental health guy. I love it. I think it's I think it's a different approach to old school business thoughts, you know, where you just had to keep constantly grinding yourself to the ground. You know, you're you're saying it differently now. You're like, no, if you're not good enough for you, you're not gonna be good enough for anybody. You're thinking as, you know, you're the heart of this business, but then it flows out to everybody else, which I love that thought process because if you can't be good to yourself, how are you gonna be good to other people, basically? Misty Dane Smith: Yes. Maddie Andrews: I am totally on this journey myself, so I have my own business. And then I work on another full-time job and I'm in grad school. And for a year I worked seven days a week, 14 hours. And now I'm starting, it's like catching up with me. And I'm so proud of myself because tomorrow I scheduled a 90 minute massage with aromatherapy anti-toxins. And my neck, so I'm gonna start scheduling massages because I don't feel like I can move my neck or my back right now from the stress. Misty Dane Smith: No. That's good. I love that. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah, that's what I need. I need you to sketch me one too, Maddie where you at it? Just go ahead, you know, I'll take one though. Sounds good sounds good to me. I'm on the way right now. You know, I'll hop in the cart and I'll be there. It'll take me a little time, but I'll get there, don't worry. But no, I I think I think it's great though. I think I think your approach to it makes sense. So, you know, you're looking at it from the aspect of, you know, stop trying to find the time but plan the time, you know, and I think that a lot of people forget that when it comes to stuff. Maddie Andrews: Yeah, just drive up to North Carolina and get a massage with me tomorrow, P. It'll be great. Misty Dane Smith: Ha ha ha ha. Pete "Da Common Denominator": As you know, it's the same thing with podcasting. It's like a business as well. You have to plan these things out. You know, how are you gonna drop it? What are you gonna do? What's your plan of action of how you're gonna drop the different things that you're gonna tease out the episodes to other people? ⁓ you know, so I think it's it's great. I think that what you're doing is a great approach to it versus the old world mentality where it's just keep grinding until you completely fall apart and then you're no good to anybody because that's how a lot of these other people, you know, and other people have met before were like, ⁓ you just gotta keep grinding, you gotta keep going. I'm like, Yeah, but if you don't have the You don't worry about yourself. How are you gonna do anything at the end of the day for anybody? It's not gonna be good. And especially you being a mom, you know, you gotta be there for the kids too. So you don't only just have the business, you have the kids. You're trying to keep the household going, you know, depending on what your roles are with your your roles with your husband were at the time. You know, whatever you guys decided worked best for you guys, you know, and things like that too. And it and it all it's all a juggling act nowadays, you know, for a lot of things, you know, and planning it out is how I do things too, 'cause you know, I plan a lot of stuff. Misty Dane Smith: Mm-hmm. Right. Maddie Andrews: Yeah, yeah Pete "Da Common Denominator": And that way I can figure out ahead of time so I have a plan for where I wanna be and how I'm gonna get there. That that's what the what I'm trying to figure out now, you know. So Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, yeah. I think also it's people think it's selfish. You know, they have a mentality of, ⁓ I can't think about myself. Like, well then who is? If you don't think about yourself, who will? Like there's there's just like a mindset shift we have to create within people. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Maddie Andrews: Yeah! Pete "Da Common Denominator": Exactly, Misty, exactly. Misty Dane Smith: to see that one that they're worthy of that. They're worthy of having a date of themselves and to love themselves, right? You know, 'cause we don't enjoy life as much. Like if you're if your battery's down, life is down. So we have to remember if we replenish and we're full, life is full. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. You know, there's a guy I met that came in where I was working at. He ⁓ he always said he was like, ⁓ yeah, I'm working day fifteen and like, dude, so what are you doing with all that money? I don't know, man, I had a time to think about that's the problem. You're working all these hours but you have no end game in mind. Like, what are you doing with all that? Are you planning something for yourself? I always kept telling him like, dude, you gotta go plan something, man. You gotta go take yourself on a trip, do something. It doesn't matter, whatever you enjoy, go do something. Go hunting or whatever, you know, 'cause I'm in Texas, so you know, hunting's very big for these guys either. Go do something like that, plan a trip and go hunting or whatever. You know, do something enjoy. And he was like, Yeah, you know, I should think of that. You know, yeah, you should, because you're like sixteen days in a row. Like this is crazy. And every time I see him, like, d I'm like, What's going on, Marathon man? What what what day are we at now? And we're just counting the days off together. And he's Kiss Cole and he's like, Well, I'm at day like sixteen right now. I'm like, Jesus, dude. You know, but I think that's the mentality these that people have these days. It's like they want to make all this money, but they don't have any plans for it. It's like, so what are you what are you working for? I don't know. Then then what are you working for? Then you don't have a goal in mind. You don't have an endgame. Maddie Andrews: Hahaha Misty Dane Smith: Ha ha ha. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Hey, listen, I'm working towards this. I'm working towards that. They don't plan anything out. And it's like, why aren't you planning things these days? Like that's the most efficient way to get around things. You know, clearly Misty's saying the same thing too. It's like you gotta plan these kind of things out. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. Or they're making decisions off of just their emotional state in the moment, which is not good either. You know. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Right. Yeah. Yeah. No, I agree a hundred percent with you there. Yeah, no. No, you know, we've seen a lot of those things happen, you know, or they drive themselves in the ground and then it's like when you're gone, then it's like, what are you gonna do with all that money? You can't take it with you, you might as well do something with it while you're in process. You know, enjoy life. I think that's where a lot of people nowadays they don't enjoy enough out of life. They just worry too much about working and it's like, I get you gotta work, but ask yourself that question. What are you working towards? Well, I don't know. Well then what are you working for then? You know, it's that constant question of like, you know, you keep asking yourself that coun continually cycling question of what is it you're working for? Well, I don't know. And you know, like you were saying, set goals, you know, and and plan something out. You want to take those two vacations, you know, you gotta plan out the two vacations. Where are you gonna go? You don't just show up place and go, Well, I don't know, you know, you gotta plan something. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, for sure. Anywhere with a beach. Well, I say anywhere. I wouldn't want to go to Galveston. Maddie Andrews: Where's your favorite place to vacation? Hehehehehe Pete "Da Common Denominator": Listen, Galveston wasn't too bad for a while. I've been down there before, but now it's just like, ugh You know, I agree. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. I mean I would take my kids when they were little just for fun 'cause it's a drive, but you know. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah, no, I agree. I go to I go myself. I got here where I'm at. There's ⁓ this big rock park where I'm at. It's like these big rock formations on the river and things like that. It's so nice. Just go out there and just kinda hang out for a bit. Because it's so damn hot during the summer. Like I think it's supposed to be like nineties all this week where we're at. And I'm like, ⁓ especially if you get south of like Houston, it's like, ⁓ God, that humidity down there is so horrible. Cause I lived right in the Houston area for a long time. And I remember there's days you come outside, you can feel the moisture in there. I'm like, ⁓ no, forget this. I wanna go back inside. I wanna be outside this, you know. And then we ran through this, what is that? One year we like the thirty days of a hundred degree weather and like, ⁓ no, no. This is too hot for me, man. Maddie Andrews: Sounds like North Carolina. North Carolina gets hot but it's so humid that it feels so much worse than it is. It's like living in a jungle. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Like the rainforest, yeah. So hot. Misty Dane Smith: Sorry for it. ⁓ Maddie Andrews: Yeah. Pete "Da Common Denominator": So Misty, let me ask you this though, for people that want to start a business, what do you what is your what do you s what do you suggest to people? Like figure out something they're passionate about? Maybe, you know, you know, where where would they start? Because you know, people always ask that question, you know, how is it I start getting about these things? Misty Dane Smith: Well, yeah, obviously you want to like what you're doing since you're gonna be doing it the majority of the time you're awake, right? And I think that we forget that in all businesses we're serving to a point, right? We're we're doing something for somebody else. We're in a service ⁓ mentality or offering something. So pouring into people, I think the mindset as well in that situation, we don't want to just think I'm gonna do this because I want money. That burns out really fast. No, I have one of my boys, he's just money hungry. I don't make enough money doing that. I'm like, but do you like it? Like, right, everything's a season. So people get so stuck like it's forever. And it's like things are in seasons. Like we have to remember there's little pockets in time where we do certain things, but it's gonna shift and change into something else. So where would you like that to go? But Yes, have a goal in mind no matter what that looks like. And don't be afraid. ⁓ a lot of people are like, what if I make the wrong decision? I'm like, there is no wrong decision. You can change it at any moment at any time. You can tweak it, turn it, twist it, totally forget about it and start over fresh. Like there's no right or wrong answer as long as you're enjoying life and this is what you want to do. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Misty Dane Smith: So have a goal in mind, obviously have a passion and get a mentor. A mentor will help drive you, help you stay focused, have you go, okay, this is where you're at. Let's do work on this today. Find your weaknesses, find your strengths. ⁓ that's really important. A lot of people don't know what they're good at and even or what they're bad at. So it's like they're just like, well, I'm gonna figure that out, you know. I have the internet. Okay, yeah, but the internet only does so much, right? I'm gonna ask Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. I love it. I have the internet. Misty Dane Smith: I'm gonna have chat to you know create my business for me. Yeah, well that's a little dangerous because chat sometimes isn't gonna give you the truth. So finding someone who's been through it or succeeded in it or has a passion for the same things or just has that thing you're looking for, right? That spark. You're like, I like this person. They have da-da-da-da-da. I want to talk to them. And you can have multiples. You don't even have to have one. I feel like that's a huge importance that I've missed as an entrepreneur is having someone to look to, someone to call on, someone to guide me through the ups and the downs. ⁓ You know, because you spend so much time in areas that are wasted. Spend money in places that you'll never see again. So it's important Important to just know your path and have a good framework and have someone that you're working under guiding you. You'll get there faster. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Especially with the beauty market changing constantly with the different things that are coming out all the time. Do you do you specify and do you sti stick to one area or do you kind of just cover everything? 'Cause there's so many different things out there. Like all these different products and you know what I mean? It's so hard to keep up with these things, man. Like, you know, are you constantly on the move of like learning new stuff about everything coming out? Because you have to be, don't you, technically in that area? Maddie Andrews: Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: Yes and no. I mean, you can say like, hey, I'm a extension specialist and you stay in extensions, but yeah, there's multiple extensions coming out and different styles coming out and different ways to do it and different looks. You know, do you want it root tip? Do you want it blended? Do you want it operate? Do you want it, you know what I mean? Like so yes and no, you can stay within a category, but it still fluctuates. ⁓ but I guess that's what's fun for me because I get bored. So I'm like, what else do I learn? What else do I want to add to my work? Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: So Pete "Da Common Denominator": I get bored too, don't worry, Misty. I have two Sodcast shows I do and then I'm thinking of a third one already. Yeah, people tell me I do too much. So I'm right there with you. Don't worry. Everybody makes fun of me. Are you are you familiar with human design at all? We're probably both man generators. I know I am, and you probably fall in the same category I am too. You know what I mean? So it constantly explains our need to constantly want to do something every different way, you know? And people always tell us we're doing too much. I'm like, I'm just keeping myself busy at this point, you know. I I I Maddie Andrews: Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: Yes. Yes. ⁓ Right. Pete "Da Common Denominator": I have already worked like I was already working forty-five hours a week, plus I'm doing this show, plus I do another show that I do full time. And you know, then I'm having to post everything. And people are like, ⁓ how do you do it all? I'm like, I get it done. I mean, at this point it's it keeps me busy and I enjoy what I'm doing. I don't I don't hate what I'm doing. I love what I'm doing. Like my main show is, you know, mental health strictly. I sit down and talk to people every single day about a topic that's continuously growing, you know, like you know, with the the rates of suicides and things like that just continually going, and you see these numbers. And everybody's like, well, we're talking about it. Well, where are we talking about it? Because you can't talk about it on a TikTok because they censor you there. You know, it's like, so then you're already closing off half your market right there almost because there's such a broad base there, but you can't have a real conversation there. So, you know, we've already discovered this with our friend Jimmy. We're talking about, you know, mental health and social media don't go well for kids. So, you know, you as a mom, do you do you worry about those kind of things though? Like the peop the kids seeing things on the internet and the misinformation out there. Because there's there's so much floating around. And it's a scary thing as a parent myself, because my daughter just graduated high school the other ⁓ a few days ago. And I'm like thinking like the things that she sees on the internet, it's just like, ⁓ well, I want to be a streamer or this and that. It's like, do you understand the work these people put in to do these kind things? It's like, I don't think they they don't use these things. We have phones for For the good. It's like you don't look at things that you should be looking at. You're looking at all the okay, well, I see these are doing, but I don't think about what steps they take to get there. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, ⁓ parenting is a whole nother conversation, man. ⁓ Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: that it's it will make you a new creature for sure. ⁓ yeah, the world's scary and a lot of pe parents go, ⁓ well, now it's okay to just chop body parts off and just be whoever you want to be. If you want to be a purple dotted unicorn, then okay, that's what you're gonna be. You know, there's no reality in it. I and and and I it breaks my heart. I feel like parents forget we're here to guide our our our kids and protect them. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: And shelter them, at least until they're of age, right? At least until they're of age to make those decisions for themselves. Because when you look at ⁓ brain development in children, they cannot make certain decisions because their brain isn't made to do it yet. Like you can't have a kid make certain decisions because they don't even know. Their brain doesn't even work that way. So it's like when you start Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Maddie Andrews: Yes. Misty Dane Smith: digging in and and and looking at things like that, like it it makes sense why we have parents to help us and guide us and shelter us and love us. But yeah, the world is scary and if I had to do it again, I would have kept my kids at home for sure. Like Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. I I don't blame you. Listen, I don't blame you. Today's today's education system doesn't really make sense, you know, and with the internet adding in a lot of the things for ways to get bullied and all these other things, you know. And a scary statistic, Misty, is that kids boys from ten to fourteen, the suicide rates in them alone are going up, you know. And with the introduction of the internet, it it multiplied that because now you have more ways these guys can pick on each other. And you know, and and we used to make fun of these helicopter parents. And you know, as a parent and you as a parent, we could probably understand these things, you know. And I'm not to say Maddie wouldn't understand either, 'cause she's a very intellectual woman, you know. But you you know what I'm saying? Like it's like, but we used to make fun of these people for monitoring ⁓ but now they they were right all along though, if you think about it, because what are what are the things these kids are seeing online? They're seeing all these girls, these really pretty girls, you know, for girls. They're seeing all these pretty girls and thinking, okay, well I have to look I have to look like this to make boys like me. Misty Dane Smith: ⁓ yeah. Ha ha ha. Yeah. Predators. Pete "Da Common Denominator": So now I have to dress a certain way because this is what the internet says, and society says I have to dress like this. We really shouldn't have to, you know, and it's hard because you're you're fighting against it now. No longer are you just parenting, you're fighting the internet too, because now they're seeing all this misinformation, and you have to wonder what their state of mind is with those, especially when it comes to a lot of these influencers out there. They're telling them, ⁓ you need to buy all these expensive things to do this, and you don't. You really don't need all this crap. It's just because that's the easily influenced. ⁓ well, I like this person, so I like the okay, I get that. But at the same time, you don't have to spend all this money like they do on things, you know, you to to look like they do. You're your own individual person. And I feel like that's the constant fight that we're battling nowadays, is that you have that and then you have the the people that are putting things out on the internet and then they're getting the such negative responses that they're reacting from that too because it's affecting them and then they're not telling us about it as well. You know, so you as a parent, you're constantly fighting all these different corners of different things coming at them, you know. Misty Dane Smith: what I've seen with my ⁓ stepchildren because they obviously were raised in a different home than mine, ⁓ there's a huge difference because my husband instilled ⁓ self-worth. Like those children know themselves so well that no matter what they see, it doesn't affect them. Pete "Da Common Denominator": That that's awesome. That's awesome. I love it. Misty Dane Smith: And I think that's huge. Like you can have an emotional conversation with these children. And they're and they're intelligent. They're like, no, this is who I am. This is how I feel. And I I look at my children at that age and I was like, they could have never had these conversations, but they were in the system, right? Like I I and I'm, you know, I I love my parents, but I wasn't raised that way either. No one taught me emotional maturity at as a child. Like, hey, how are you feeling right now? Let's talk about that. Let's break it down. It's okay to have these emotions. These emotions are normal. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: But it's how do we deal with them? And we're not teaching our children how to deal with emotions. So what are they doing? They're trying to self-regulate with outside sources. And then we're wondering what's wrong with our kids. It's like, well, yeah, because they're not, they don't know how to regulate. We haven't taught them like it's okay to feel this way. Let's talk about it. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Exactly. Yeah, l or what is what it feels like, what that is, what you're dealing with, what the possible things you're dealing with, you know, and and just mental health in general too. And emotional regulation is definitely one thing I'm a big believer in that we need to start teaching these children at a younger age. At least let them understand what these feelings are, they're feeling so they can better understand what is so when they become adults, they have a better understanding of what what they're what they're even dealing with. Like, okay, well, I better understand these things, you know. And I think the self birthing is a great thing to teach them too. Like, let them understand that, you know. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. Pete "Da Common Denominator": At the end of the day, you're an individual person. Like what everybody else thinks about you doesn't matter. Forget them. It shouldn't matter. As long as you're happy doing you, it doesn't matter. You want to go on the stress as a purple dinosaur? I don't care what you're doing. You know what I'm saying? Like, like I told my kids the same thing all the time. My one daughter, she she actually is she's gay, so she's like, Well, Dad, I'm into girls. Okay, so do you want me to love you any less? I don't understand what this conversation is going. She just looks at me. I'm like, Well, what do you want me to say that? No, don't do that. I don't I'm like, like, if you're happy. Misty Dane Smith: ⁓ yeah. Right. How do I respond? Pete "Da Common Denominator": Like what what do you want me to say in this adway? You like I literally asked too. I'm looking at him like, so okay, what's your point? Are you did you want me to say no? Do you want me to shun you for it? I'm like, I'm not gonna do any of those things. I'm like, okay, cool, I still love you the same way. You're still my kid. You could you could like this screw dinosaurs for like I don't care. Like, listen, whatever you're into, hey, listen, I'm here to support you, man. The point is is that I as long as you're happy, they treat you good, I don't care. As long as I don't have to deal with the situation, because if I have to get involved, I'll handle it my own way. But you know. If you're happy, that's what matters at the end of the day. Like, you know, and I've always taught them the same thing to be accepting of other people, you know, like whatever it is, you know, and I think, you know, like I said with her, she's a little she's a little more easily influenced. I think so, I wanna do this, I wanna do that. She's one of those people that jump a lot of trends and I'm just like, ⁓ God help us all, you know. Misty Dane Smith: Well, they're all easily influenced, that's the problem. Because if they were emotionally stable at a younger age, we wouldn't have all these problems with these kids. But I think I think your kids coming to you and saying, Hey, this is what I'm experiencing, I think it's like a a a a temperature gauge. Like how is my parents gonna respond to this? How Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah, yeah. Right. Exactly. Yeah. Because if my missy, my mom didn't take it well. My brother found it. My brother was gay and he was gonna be transgender and everything. He was transitioning from girl to boy. My mom flipped and like he felt like he had to write a letter for her. And I've like, I knew the whole time. Like, bro, I told him I tell him I talk about him all the time on the show. He's like, ⁓ you talking about I'm like, Yeah, man, it's until the people know that I don't care. I've been your support system since day one, dude. I knew before you even told me. Misty Dane Smith: Mm-hmm. Pete "Da Common Denominator": You know, 'cause I I saw the things that I noticed, you know, and I'm very observant of what was going on around me, you know, and my response to my kids was the same thing. It's like, Okay, cool, but that's what you're into, more power to you. But, you know, a lot of people aren't accepting of that because it's whatever reason you want to put in there. And it's it's scary. It's Maddie Andrews: Are your parents accepting now? Pete "Da Common Denominator": ⁓ yeah, my dad, my dad didn't care from the beginning. He didn't care. My mom, she was surprisingly a little weird at first, but she's okay with it now. My mom my mom's never been the type of person to ever accept anything. Like she doesn't like change or things. Like like when I when I when she abandoned me at ten and then I left the house and I didn't want to come back after the whole incident, she got mad and told me I'm the one that had problems. But the therapist we went and saw told her she had coping issues because I had just moved on. And you know, when I found out later on when I did a star chart reading during doing my other show. Maddie Andrews: That's good. Misty Dane Smith: Nobody does. Pete "Da Common Denominator": During the first season we we had gotten into that and we noticed that, you know, I don't know if you're familiar with the moons, but I have an Aries moon, which which was explaining that an Aries moon is the reason why I just cut people off sometimes. Like when I'm done with you, I'm done with you. And when it came to that situation, I was just like instantly at a young age, I like, Well, I'm done with you now. Okay, you you cut me off, I cut you off back, you know, and everything else like that. Now, me and my mom have a talking relationship now, you know, may get better. I don't know. We'll see. I am planning to move closer back to where she's at. And my kids are at some work. I'm gonna try and bridge the gap. I know she wants to have a relationship. ⁓ you know, so that's that's to be continued. But, you know, I I just like it explained a lot though after I started reading or doing a starter reading, a lot of things that made sense to me of why things were, you know. And then it said, you know, in my reading too, the woman said, She's like, You have problems with your mom. And I never told her any of this information prior to this conversation. We I just gave her my birth date, where I was born. And my time and date. And she literally had read it all off that chart alone of just different things that she had read off the chart alone. She's reading this chart results. And you're seeing the different things that played out, which is it's really crazy because it was like I never told her any information. She had nothing, knew nothing about me. She only knew that somebody else that I interviewed prior has had talked to me before that she knew. She's like, ⁓ yeah, you I know so and so I know somebody else that I talked to. ⁓ yeah, you know, I know that person. And that's all the information she had about me. Do nothing else about me. None of that other stuff like that too, you know? And she was like the things that she said made a lot of sense, you know, like me being an Aries moon, I cut people off. So like I I just literally just I don't have time. Like when I'm done with you, I'm done with you. And that's it was like that for a long period of time, you know, especially and things like that. But for my kids, I wasn't like that with them because it's like, you know, I have to understand they're still young, they're still learning things, you know. So like I'm the one that's supposed to be teaching ⁓ these things, you know? And I have to be a little more accepting of that kind of stuff. So It's all Maddie's fault, blame her. Misty Dane Smith: Ha ha ha ha. Pete "Da Common Denominator": But no, you know, like I I mean it may it makes sense though, you know, and things like that too. And and do do you worry though about the internet though with your kids and things they're seeing though? Because like, you know, I don't know how old they are. I know you have seven of them. I know the ones that are emotionally know who they are are are b have a better fighting chance, but are are you worried about your own? Have you had talks with them about the stuff they see in the internet? Misty Dane Smith: ⁓ well my oldest, she's twenty seven and so she's already seen and done a lot of everything. So you know, she's an adult now, even though she makes stupid decisions. ⁓ yeah, there's plenty of stories that we get in without. ⁓ but she's my only girl and then I we have six boys. So ⁓ yes, she's probably ⁓ her Pete "Da Common Denominator": Okay. Yeah. She's Misty Dane Smith: 21 and she's been a big challenge for me, put me through a lot. So ⁓ I think I I think I'm still working through some of the stuff. Pete "Da Common Denominator": ⁓ Missy's like I still think I'm working through it. Misty Dane Smith: But 'cause I I mean my boys were angels. I was like, Y'all are so much easier. Like she had the cops called on her more than times than I can count. And my boys were like, I don't go to parties, I don't drink, I don't do drugs, you know. ⁓ some of them had too many girlfriends, but you know, that's besides the point. Yeah. Pete "Da Common Denominator": ⁓ man. Yeah, that happens. That happens, you know, mom, that that happens, you know. The boys we tend to do those kind of crazy things, you know, and things like that as well. So ⁓ you know, so but yeah, anyway, so what are your plans for the future though? Are you are you planning to expand further into other avenues? Are you just sticking strictly to health and beauty? 'Cause I know you said you'll your business model works for a lot of businesses. Are you planning to try and try and expand? Because I know you're always looking for new things. Are you looking for new challenges like that? Misty Dane Smith: shifting I do a lot of one to one coaching so I'm trying to shift to one to many. I'm trying to build communities right now for people. So it's not just me that they have a whole community to bounce off of and get advice from and grow from and yeah. Right. Pete "Da Common Denominator": ⁓ okay, okay. Yeah, I like that community idea, definitely. 'Cause it doesn't put it all on your shoulders. You have other people they can rely on and then they can work together and and the sense of community as well works really well. And then you could spread information and then, you know, things like that unto multiple people at once and you know, and have other people assist you. And then it's not always missy, missy, your my inbox blowing up like it's about to go off or something. You know, if your phone's gonna explode. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, well it's nice, you know, I feel like entrepreneurship sometimes feels lonely until you can find a really a good group that you feel like it's family and you can go to and say, Hey, this situation's happening and you just post and people respond and that's kind of what I'm looking for, for just that comfortable place where you're not alone, you know, you you don't have to make decisions alone. You know, it's not like we're mentors, but at least we can give you, hey, this is a situation I was in and this is what I did and what worked for me. ⁓ Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, lived experience basically for everybody. Could bounce off ideas of each other. I love the idea of that. Do you do where are you basing it on? It Facebook, Instagram, any any place in particular, are you doing like school? I know school's another big thing that's been coming up. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. Yeah, for right now this specific one is on Facebook. Yeah, so I have it on there. It's like Salon, Spa, Beauty, ⁓ Owner owners, something like that. Business owners, I think that's what it's called. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Okay. Yeah, you see, that's funny that you say Salon, 'cause our good friend Whitney actually, she had been on the show twice now and she and Maddie got to meet her as well. She was actu she actually is a hairstylist. That's what she does. Cause when you said running your own business, I know she was talking about opening her home place and then she didn't for whatever reasons. You know, it could have been that she maybe she had a fail. So we may need to link her up with you and see maybe you can help her out too and and things like that. Cause she was as soon as you said that I was the first I was thinking of like, damn. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, for sure. Pete "Da Common Denominator": I gotta reach out to Whitney and see what she's up to and see what she should maybe maybe Misty can help her out with something she may have done wrong or something. And I think I know she's in the Atlanta, Georgia area. I know that much about her. ⁓ and things like that too. So I'll have to reach out there and get you connected with her, though. But she's she's been on the show a few times and she was in the past few weeks. I've been talking to her about that, though. She was planning opening her own salon. She was doing her own thing at one point. And then she started doing that. And then I know she said she stopped for whatever reason. I guess that fell through. So maybe. Misty Dane Smith: Okay. Yeah, definitely. Pete "Da Common Denominator": You never know, maybe you can help her figure that out. Maybe there's something she did wrong, so that'd be kinda cool. So no Misty Dane Smith: Definitely. Yeah, I'd love to help her. You know that's a big thing, like I feeding into people, like if they win, I win. That's what I love about it, right? It's you get back what you put in. So I love it. Yeah. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Exactly. And it it's great to see people that you taught go on, do something because they can say, ⁓ well, that's that's Misty's person or you know, somebody that's associated with you. Well, yeah, that's the product of my person. That's what I did. That's the person I taught out that and it gives you more reputation too. And more people see that you have more credibility 'cause they're like, Well, Misty's the one that gave me all the tools to get me and the start on this thing and they'll just keep coming to you and then you'll have the community built by that point. ⁓ well, you're here, come join my community, here we go. Do do you any plans to expand other sites? Like, you there's there's tick I'm telling you right now, TikTok is is a scary place, but a great place at the same time for a lot of networking for people, man. A lot of people are on there doing a lot of things that are really interesting. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, I I just don't have time for it all. Like maybe if I hire like a social media person, they can do it all for me, but Maddie, is that what you do? Pete "Da Common Denominator": Many, there you go. There's an add that to many one of your many jobs. Maddie Andrews: You No, I run a mental health based nonprofit and I work at an inpatient psych and detox unit and I'm getting my masters in social work at Carolina. So I'm more mental health based. Yeah, yeah. I work way too much as what he was getting at. Pete "Da Common Denominator": I figure she's just got nothing to the list, you know. Misty Dane Smith: ⁓ I love it. Yeah. We don't Gotcha. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah, no, I do the all the posting for the sites. It's for both shows and everything, but I use ⁓ I use a program that spits everything out for me. But I spend a lot of time on TikTok too. I do a lot of a lot of live interactions with people and things like that and all this kind of like things. So I'm always constantly trying to get traction anywhere I can. ⁓ I don't really venture on X too much, man. That's a scary place. Like X, I'm like, yeah. I I don't know what they what happened to X, it just went to something completely other than what it shouldn't be, man. Like you can see some crazy things on there. I spent a lot of time on Instagram. Misty Dane Smith: Ha ha ha Pete "Da Common Denominator": ⁓ and things like that too. So, you know, that's why I was curious because I know a lot of people start communities. They could be going to school though is the new thing, like that new community thing. I had one, but I just didn't have the time to spend on it. I like, ooh, this is too much for me to take on right now. But you know, it's like a like an old school messaging board kind of thing. So it may be something you may want to consider down the road, you know, because you can earn you can set it up to be like a members only type thing and earn like, you know, income off that too. Cause I know a lot of people Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. Yeah. Pete "Da Common Denominator": That's what they go to, like paid content and you can do like certain classes with people where you can coach ⁓ and do little different events that people sign up for to come join and things like that. You can host classroom settings and teach ⁓ all different things that, you know, different aspects of the business and things like that too, that might might flourish really well for you. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, I have a school for like s beauty beginners. But what I'm focusing on right now is people that are already in business, kind of helping them clean up their their business. So I have I have both. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Well, I mean it makes sense though, because you're working on the strategies that work. That way you can take it and bring it to the new people and be like, All right, these are the proven strategies that have worked for other people. I think it's a great business idea. I think you're doing great with what you're doing. I think what you're doing is you're figuring out what works and what doesn't work. And that way when you start to go down that avenue for newer business owners, you could be like, Okay, well here's some steps to get you started and kind of work on a planform. Like, listen, hey, these are the things I know that worked other people. Let's see what works for you kind of thing, you know, and then just branch it out from there kind of thing. So I I think it's great, honestly. Misty Dane Smith: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Maddie Andrews: appreciate that you're taking all this knowledge that you could just use for yourself but instead you're like spreading it and like I like what you said earlier about service like you're doing true service work by sharing your knowledge with other people so they can flourish as well. I think it's a beautiful thing. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. Well, we all do. I mean, you do that too. When you spend time with somebody important to somebody, you're doing the same thing. You're servicing by giving them information and knowledge that you've you've collected through your years experience. I feel like we all have it. Like Pete, you do it too on your podcast. You know, you're sharing your knowledge and your experiences with things. And, you know, we're not for everybody, but we have a group of people that hears our voice and it resonates. And that's what's important is getting that information out to people and teaching them what we know to help better their life. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Yeah, definitely. No, I agree, agree. So, Misty, if you had one business sound advice you give to somebody, what would you say to them? Misty Dane Smith: Hmm, I think I already gave you all my tips now. Maddie Andrews: You You should write a book! Misty Dane Smith: ⁓ yeah. Well I've thought about it. ⁓ That w that that would be fun. ⁓ I usually one of my things is always just find is the mentor one. I just find that that's a kind of a key piece to saving so much of your time, money and effort. ⁓ and people are like it can be expensive all night. No, it doesn't have to be expensive. There's we have the internet, right? There's videos. You can find somebody that you just follow and you know and just get tips and trips and watch their ⁓ videos and stuff. I mean ⁓ business is a is a huge Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: big, like it's a big window. There's so many things that you can venture into. So ⁓ just niching down and Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah, there's so many things. Misty Dane Smith: Getting a goal in place, I think that is huge for you because if you don't have a destination and you get in your car, you're just gonna drive around aimlessly. You're never gonna go anywhere, you're never gonna progress, you're never gonna grow. ⁓ and I think when people have a dream, just do it. Just do it. Like people think about this thing. I plan on doing this thing and it's been sitting there for 10, 20 years or whatever, it's like just do it. Just reach out, just Google, how do I start this? You know. Pete "Da Common Denominator": True. Misty Dane Smith: There's so much information out there. There is somebody there waiting to help you. Always. Just just step out and do it. I feel like we were not meant to work for other people. I'm sorry. So we were. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. No, I agree. I agree a hundred percent with you. Sometimes it's just a stepping stone to get to where you wanna be, you know, and things like that too, you know. And it it's hard working for other people because when you have your own set of rules and you wanna be different and you have different ideas and they conflict with people, I mean, ⁓ yeah, it it makes sense to me. It totally does. You know, do you have any any people you wanna reference, like business wise, mentor wise that you might want to extend to people? Like, hey, listen, should check out these guys or you know, anybody you wanna plug really quick before we start wrapping up? Misty Dane Smith: Well, some of my favorites are Russell Brunson, Elaine, ⁓ Elaine Wilder. ⁓ and I found some other people under them that I've really have cherished in my c in my career. But it just depends on what you're looking for and what you need, right? 'Cause there's somebody for everybody and Pete "Da Common Denominator": Mm-hmm. Misty Dane Smith: You you you can find stuff out there. So don't waste your time. Put your goals down on a piece of paper and make one step a day, you know? Today I'm doing this and then today I'm doing this. And you just keep going and it'll grow. I mean and it takes time. Give yourself some grace and be like, It's it's gonna I'm gonna see some progress in a year. Like a year. I'm like, Yeah, a year. ⁓ Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. I absolutely fucking I absolutely love that. I absolutely love that because you're not one of those like, well listen, I get you rich in ten minutes. Like, really? That sounds great. You know, like you're being honest with people. You're like, listen, let me be real with you. You might want to give this a year, you know, giving them a liter realistic timeline. You're not out there trying to sell them a dream and like, ⁓ well, two weeks you can make all this money. You might. It's a possibility. Whatever idea you have comes off takes off. Okay, then that you may have luck, but let's look at this realistically. Let me be real with you here. Maddie Andrews: Yeah Misty Dane Smith: That's not true. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Give yourself that gray spear and I love that that's the way you're pushing it. Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, yeah. Well, we get hard on ourselves and we're like, ⁓ it haven't made any money. It's I'm done. We're like, well let's sit back. Let's look at this. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Yeah. You know, you're right. You know, it it's the same thing as podcasting too. A lot of people get in this thing and think you're gonna make money right off the bat. And I'm like, You you got a long way to go there, Chief. Let me tell you it takes numbers and you have to really push it. And you know, there's there's a lot more that goes into this than people realize. You know, a lot of people that get in this with me are like, ⁓ man, when do I start making money? Well When you start finding sponsors and things like that, you know, there's all these things that you gotta do to get to that point. You know, you have to have a consistency, you have to have a fan base. You know, things that take time, you know. On like when I started this show, I've been about a year and a half into podcasting now. You know, I just now hit 20,000 downloads on my other show, you know, and it's like it took me a while to get there. Now, other people have gotten there before me. Okay, that's cool. That's them, that's not me, though. I don't judge my success based on what other people are doing. I'm in a unique section. I'm doing something totally different than everyone else has. I strictly interview people. I don't do any side shows on my own. And so, like what I'm doing is a whole different model compared to what everyone else is doing. And I love doing it. You know, at the end of the day, I don't mind it. I'm not I okay, cool. More power to people that are more successful at it than I am right now. That's cool. I have no experience what I'm doing. I have no training background. So everything you hear I'm saying in these shows are all 100% me. That is something I've learned. Or something I know, you know, and people are amazed by the fact that they realize that I don't prep for 90% of the shows. I'm just like, I just go in it, look at who I'm talking to. I'm like, all right, cool. I can get into this conversation, you know, and and just go for it, man. And it just be realistic, you know, because at the end of the day, people can see through that shit. They they could see, they smell it, they look for it, you know, and and I love that, but you missy that you're just straight honest with people. You're like, listen, you know, the timeline thing for for sure sticks with me the most. It's like at least you're being real with people. You're like, hey, listen. You gotta give this some grace, you know, like you gotta understand the ups and downs of what you're about to get into, you know, and you're realistic with them at so I I absolutely love that. So Missy, with that being said, do you wanna look everywhere they can find you? What's what's the best website for them to find you? You're obviously on Facebook. Are you on any other socials by chance? Misty Dane Smith: Yeah, my website's mistydonsmith.com, so it's easy and I connect all my stuff there so you can find all my goodies. Pete "Da Common Denominator": ⁓ the goodies. How do I love it? Maddie Andrews: go check out missydonsmith.com guys. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Definitely. Well, with that being said, guys, we're gonna wrap up this episode of Voice of the Voiceless, guys. As always, you know, to find us every week, Saturdays, 9 a.m., everywhere. Spotify all the way down to Pandora Radio. Yes, we're everywhere now, guys. ⁓ you know, and and like I always say, Maddie, say bye to the kids, of course, you know, because you haven't been here for a while. You want to give them a long one-did speech or something? Misty Dane Smith: Yeah. Maddie Andrews: I have missed being on the show. I have been busy. But like I always say remember kindness is free. Go out there and be kind to somebody. You never know what it can mean. It could truly save a life. Pete "Da Common Denominator": Well Missy, also Missy, thank you so much for coming to hang out with us. I really appreciate it. It was great meeting you. I love what you're doing. We'll definitely get all your notes in the show notes for sure. So they can reach out to you if they have any questions. ⁓ we'll get the link to Missy's Facebook community too for anybody that's interested that's in that area as well. That way you guys can join her and kind of help her build that thing up and ask questions and you know be more productive like that. Missy, you have any final words for everybody? Maddie Andrews: Yeah. Misty Dane Smith: Chaos is expensive. ⁓ Pete "Da Common Denominator": I love it. I love it. Well, guys, that wraps up this episode of Voice of the Voiceless. You what I always say, guys? Be bold, be bright, be one of the voice of the voiceless. Maddie Andrews: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha