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The Invisible Man: A Murderer Nobody Sees | Father Brown · Father Brown | G. K. Chesterton Detective Stories

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: The Father Brown Stories by G.K.
• 0:03
  Speaker 2: Chesterton.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: We present The Invisible Man, adapted by John Scottney, with
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: Andrew Sachs as Father Brown.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Our tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy.
• 0:32
  Speaker 4: Our tidings of comfort and joy.
• 0:39
  Speaker 5: God rest ye merry gentlemen at Mawfinnew.
• 0:47
  Speaker 6: Oh, Merry Christmas, mister.
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: And to you.
• 0:51
  Speaker 5: Oi, penny for the weights.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: Weights? What waits? There's only one of you. Penny for
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: the wait, then. Penny for the guy. That would be
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: more appropriate. Christmas isn't for another week. Yeah, rotten old scrooge.
• 1:04
  Speaker 7: Well, so here you are, then.
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: Invested wisely.
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: Oh, sixpence.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: Oh, thanks, Dove.
• 1:11
  Speaker 6: Thanks very much.
• 1:13
  Speaker 8: Merry Christmas, mister.
• 1:14
  Speaker 9: Merry Christmas.
• 1:15
  Speaker 6: See you in the shower.
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: Merry Christmas, Mrs.
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: Wilkins. Oh, you, Mr.
• 1:30
  Speaker 9: Angus.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: Yes, I'm afraid so. It's snowing again out there and
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: a bitter wind. Oh, really, Mr.
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: Angus?
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: My word, those plum puddings look absolutely deadly. Oh, Mr.
• 1:42
  Speaker 7: Angus. Look, I'll just pop through to the tea room
• 1:45
  Speaker 7: for a warming cup of your delicious coffee.
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: Well....
• 1:53
  Speaker 6: Oh, Mr.
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: Angus. Oh, Laura, alone at last.
• 1:57
  Speaker 6: And what would you like, Mr.
• 1:59
  Speaker 7: Angus?
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, the blessed ghastliness of Mrs. Wilkins' patisserie.
• 2:03
  Speaker 8: It makes her tea room such a haven of privacy.
• 2:06
  Speaker 8: A small cup of black coffee, please. How much are
• 2:09
  Speaker 8: the coconut kisses?
• 2:10
  Speaker 6: A penny, a penny.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: Oh, dear. Can't afford it.
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: I'll have to have a real kiss instead. John, don't. Mrs.
• 2:18
  Speaker 6: Wilkins will see. I'll get your order.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: Hello, Mrs Wilkins. Oh, that Mr Andrews.
• 2:27
  Speaker 7: I'd have known her idea of Christmas decorations would be holly.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: Extremely prickly, holly. Not a twig of mistletoe. Eh, Mrs Wilkins?
• 2:36
  Speaker 6: She'll throw you out. Here's your order.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: Will that be all? Oh, just one thing more.
• 2:44
  Speaker 6: I want you to marry me. Those are jokes I
• 2:47
  Speaker 6: don't allow.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: No, really. Truly. I'm being perfectly serious for once in
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: my life. As serious as a hate-me-bunt.
• 2:57
  Speaker 6: A hate-me-bunt?
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: Marriage is expensive, like the bun. One pays for it.
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: It is indigestible, like the bun. It hurts.
• 3:10
  Speaker 6: John, there's something I must.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 3:14
  Speaker 6: Anyway, what will your uncle say?
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Oh, who cares?
• 3:18
  Speaker 7: Look, the old admiral cut me off without a penny
• 3:20
  Speaker 7: years ago on account of my gross and irredeemable socialism.
• 3:25
  Speaker 7: That's how I became a poor, starving artist. Well, a
• 3:29
  Speaker 7: rather inadequately paid newspaper illustrator, actually. I repeat, I'm being
• 3:34
  Speaker 7: perfectly serious. I've even saved money. I have sold my soul.
• 3:39
  Speaker 8: I've drawn nothing for weeks but jolly robins, jolly fat
• 3:43
  Speaker 8: little men with sacks.
• 3:44
  Speaker 9: And white beards, jolly reindeer, jolly candles, jolly holly.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: I've, um, bought you a ring. Look.
• 3:55
  Speaker 6: Oh, it's lovely. Oh, John, you are serious.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: Only, oh, this is terrible.
• 4:06
  Speaker 6: You don't give me time to think.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: Ah, I'm not such a fool.
• 4:08
  Speaker 6: There's something I must tell you. I've got a breaking
• 4:11
  Speaker 6: hour for now. Where can we meet?
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: Oh, the usual place in the park.
• 4:15
  Speaker 6: But it's snowing.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: We'll build a snowman. Hello, John. Hello. There. One snowman
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: nearly finished. You haven't got a pipe and a carrot
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: about you, have you, to finish him off?
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: Mr.
• 4:35
  Speaker 5: Angus, before there's a minute more of this nonsense, I
• 4:38
  Speaker 5: must tell you something about myself as shortly as I can.
• 4:41
  Speaker 6: It's nothing I'm ashamed of, but it's... it's a nightmare.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: What?
• 4:46
  Speaker 6: Now, my father owned an inn, the Red Fish at Ludbury.
• 4:49
  Speaker 6: I used to serve behind the bar.
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: Ah, I always knew you were reared among the nobler
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: beverages than tea and coffee.
• 4:55
  Speaker 6: Look, do you mind if we walk? I'm freezing.
• 4:58
  Speaker 9: All right.
• 5:01
  Speaker 6: Lodbury's a sleepy little hole tucked away in the walls.
• 5:03
  Speaker 5: The only people who ever came to the Redfish were
• 5:05
  Speaker 5: the usual commercials and men who had nothing better to
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: do than lean about in a barroom and bet on
• 5:10
  Speaker 5: all things.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: Sounds quite idyllic. The exotic strangers and the sportive king.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: Not for myself.
• 5:16
  Speaker 6: Oh, do hold your tongue and listen. There were two
• 5:19
  Speaker 6: of them in particular. Really, I was a bit sorry
• 5:22
  Speaker 6: for them. They were so unattractive. One was very small,
• 5:26
  Speaker 6: a tiny little man. He had little bright black eyes
• 5:29
  Speaker 6: like a bird's. And he was curiously clever at all
• 5:33
  Speaker 6: kinds of things. At making a jumping kangaroo out of
• 5:36
  Speaker 6: five cigars. Or getting 15 matches to set fire.
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: To each other.
• 5:40
  Speaker 6: Like a regular firework. Isidore Smythe. That was his name.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: And the other one, was he, by contrast, enormously tall?
• 5:49
  Speaker 5: He was quite tall. He had light-coloured hair. I think
• 5:53
  Speaker 5: that was what was so dreadful about him. He was
• 5:56
  Speaker 5: so completely nondescript.
• 5:58
  Speaker 6: A dreary, silent, ordinary man. James Welkin, he was called.
• 6:02
  Speaker 5: He never did anything except soak in our bar parlour
• 6:05
  Speaker 5: and go for long walks by himself.
• 6:07
  Speaker 6: In the dull grey hills all around. So, I was
• 6:11
  Speaker 6: startled and very sorry when they both... They both offered
• 6:17
  Speaker 6: to marry me in the same week.
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: Good Lord. Did you marry them both?
• 6:24
  Speaker 5: I did a very silly thing. I had a horror
• 6:27
  Speaker 5: of their realising... I refused them because I found them
• 6:30
  Speaker 5: both so impossibly unattractive. So I made up some gas
• 6:34
  Speaker 5: about never meaning to marry anyone who... Oh, it sounds ridiculous,
• 6:37
  Speaker 5: but I was very young. Anyone who hadn't carved.
• 6:40
  Speaker 6: His own way in the world.
• 6:42
  Speaker 5: Two days later, the old trouble began. I suddenly heard
• 6:46
  Speaker 5: that both of them had gone off to seek their fortunes.
• 6:50
  Speaker 6: As though they were in some silly fairy tale.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: And now they've come back from the gold fields of Australia.
• 6:56
  Speaker 9: With red shirts, huge moustaches and sacks full.
• 6:59
  Speaker 7: Of half-time nuggets.
• 7:00
  Speaker 6: Not quite. What time is it?
• 7:04
  Speaker 7: Half past.
• 7:05
  Speaker 6: I must be getting back. Come on, we must hurry.
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: Wait a minute. What happened?
• 7:12
  Speaker 5: About a fortnight ago, I got a letter from Smythe.
• 7:15
  Speaker 5: And this last week, he's come in the tea room twice.
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: What?
• 7:18
  Speaker 5: I suppose you've seen all the hoardings all about this
• 7:20
  Speaker 5: Smythe silent service.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: Yes, I know.
• 7:24
  Speaker 9: Turn a switch, a housemaid who doesn't flirt. Set a dial,
• 7:27
  Speaker 9: a cook who is never cross.
• 7:28
  Speaker 5: All kinds of fancy machines for doing the housework. Vacuum
• 7:32
  Speaker 5: carpet sweepers, steam washing machines, electric refrigerators, electric kettles. Anyway,
• 7:39
  Speaker 5: these machines, whatever they are, they're making him pots of money.
• 7:50
  Speaker 9: Oh, all right now, Laura, we're here, we're back, and
• 7:52
  Speaker 9: we've still got five minutes to spare, and there's something
• 7:55
  Speaker 9: you haven't told me.
• 7:56
  Speaker 5: What?
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: The other man, hmm?
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: Yes, you're right.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 8:01
  Speaker 6: He's the one I'm frightened of. I haven't seen him.
• 8:05
  Speaker 6: I've heard him.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Well, how?
• 8:08
  Speaker 6: It was just a few seconds before Smythe let him
• 8:10
  Speaker 6: come through the door. I heard his laugh. I opened
• 8:16
  Speaker 6: the door.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: And?
• 8:18
  Speaker 6: There was no one there.
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: Good.
• 8:21
  Speaker 6: I've forgotten how he laughed. It's one of the reasons
• 8:24
  Speaker 6: I found him so unattractive.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: I say, that's rum.
• 8:28
  Speaker 6: Yes, it is, isn't it?
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: No, I don't mean that, though it is, of course.
• 8:32
  Speaker 6: I mean this, here.
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: Well, this paper stuck to the shop window. This thing's stripped.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: Do you know what it says?
• 8:39
  Speaker 7: Smile, Jean W.
• 8:41
  Speaker 10: If you marry him, he will die.
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: Who the devil are you?
• 8:47
  Speaker 6: Is it or?
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: Sorry I startled you.
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: Ha, ha.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: It's the office all shoes, one of my own products.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: They're very quiet, especially in the snow. And this gentleman, Laura? Mr.
• 8:57
  Speaker 6: John Turnbull Angus.
• 8:59
  Speaker 3: Mr.
• 8:59
  Speaker 6: Isidore Smythe.
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: How do you do?
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: How do you do?
• 9:04
  Speaker 4: It is undoubtedly Welkin's writing, is it not, Laura?
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: Aye. I came to tell you that I, too, have
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: heard from James. Have you?
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 9:11
  Speaker 4: Five times in the last fortnight, he's left threatening letters
• 9:14
  Speaker 4: at my flat. Yet the porter swears he didn't see
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: anyone in the least suspicious. And here he is, facing
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: up some sort of dado on public shop window, while people.
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: In shop were... Quite so. While the people in the
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: shop were having their tea.
• 9:26
  Speaker 3: Aye.
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: Well, rather, while the person.
• 9:27
  Speaker 7: In the shop was having his tea, there's only that
• 9:29
  Speaker 7: little priest.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: We must speak to him. What? Ah. Yes, can't stop. Oh, Mr.
• 9:37
  Speaker 6: Angus.
• 9:37
  Speaker 7: Evening, Mrs.
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: Wilkins. I see traders looking up.
• 9:40
  Speaker 9: A customer.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: A guest.
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: Oh, Laura.
• 9:43
  Speaker 6: I'll explain in a minute, Mrs.
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: Wilkins.
• 9:45
  Speaker 6: I hope you will.
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: Excuse me. Are you speaking to me? Could we have
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: a word with you a minute, please, Father? Oh, yes. Yes, certainly.
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: If you marry him, he will die.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, dear. The thing is, Father, do you see anybody
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: who's to get up there?
• 10:10
  Speaker 6: I wonder what those little holes can be.
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: It's probably sandpaper.
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: Easy enough to get hold of and no one could
• 10:15
  Speaker 4: possibly trace it. More important, oh, Father, did you see anyone?
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: Stick it there.
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: No, no, then I wouldn't, you see. I'm terribly short-sighted,
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: isn't it? I was rather a long way away.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: Oh, I have perfect eyesight. Ah. I assure you, I
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: saw nobody. Oh, that's amazing.
• 10:34
  Speaker 9: Well, if I were you, Smilo, chap, I'd put the
• 10:36
  Speaker 9: whole thing in the hands of some energetic private inquiry agent.
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: Well, you're right, of course, and.
• 10:41
  Speaker 4: But some of these private detective fellows are rare, you know.
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: Now, there perhaps I may be able to help. I
• 10:48
  Speaker 3: know an extremely clever fellow. His name's Flambeau.
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: Oh, he's a foreigner. Yes.
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: His office is in town, but his flat's not far away.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: Do mention me, Father Brown. It's only a few stops
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: on the Penny Omnibus. Penny Omnibus be done. I'll go
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: in the car.
• 11:04
  Speaker 6: Go with him, John.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: Why?
• 11:06
  Speaker 6: He may need help.
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: Now, look here.
• 11:08
  Speaker 6: No, don't worry. The threat's against Mr. Smythe. Not against me. Remember,
• 11:13
  Speaker 6: I know James well, Kim.
• 11:21
  Speaker 4: I designed the car myself, Mr.
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: Angus.
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: As you see, it is extremely simple to drive.
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: Anybody by me will not need to employ a chauffeur.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: It's remarkable. To keep a servant, Mr. Angus.
• 11:32
  Speaker 6: Servant?
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: No, I can't afford to.
• 11:35
  Speaker 4: I can't afford to. I'm a millionaire, but I choose
• 11:38
  Speaker 4: not to. And my rival, I suspect I should say
• 11:42
  Speaker 4: our rival.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: Well.
• 11:44
  Speaker 9: Welkin, yes.
• 11:46
  Speaker 4: He was left a little money. When I last saw him,
• 11:49
  Speaker 4: he was drinking his way pretty deeply into that capital.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: I don't know what Laura told you. Well, she gave
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: me a... Oh, dear.
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: Whatever Laura may have imagined, I always earned every penny
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: I spent.
• 12:02
  Speaker 6: I had to.
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: My parents there were already long dead. They've been servants
• 12:07
  Speaker 4: of it all. Between them, they earn £ 50 a year
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: for a 12-hour day. Black leading grades, boiling laundry. Mind
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: your backs! Heating up water on fire and carrying it
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: up for master's bath. Sweeping and dusting it killed my mother.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry to hear it, sir.
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: Such drudgery is unnecessary. I believe that in 60, 70
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: years' time, say by 1970, 1980, no one will need
• 12:33
  Speaker 4: to employ domestic servants or to be employed as a servant.
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: And the reason, machines of which the machines I manufacture
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: are but the primitive ancestors. It will be the new
• 12:45
  Speaker 4: golden age, but a golden age without slavery.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: I don't mind that horse. Obsolete animal! I get carried away. Ah, Hampstead.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: We must be nearly there. What's the address? Loughnow Mansions.
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: How very odd.
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: I live at Himalaya Mansions, just round Corny.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: Look, why don't you come up to my flat?
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: I'll show you Wilkins letters and you can run round
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: and get that flambeau chap.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Here we are, my flat. Well, I've hurt your eyes.
• 13:21
  Speaker 2: I beg your pardon?
• 13:23
  Speaker 4: Well, I turned this combination lock to neutralize burglar alarm system. Otherwise,
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: when I open the door, bells will ring in here
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: and in Hallport's office.
• 13:29
  Speaker 7: Oh, I see.
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: Good. Now we can go in. See? Electric light comes
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: on as we enter. Come through to the kitchen. Shut
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: the door.
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: Oh, yes.
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: Good Lord, what a battery. Peritoneal. What's that?
• 13:43
  Speaker 4: That is my electric knife sharpening and polishing machine.
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: I say, I wouldn't mind having one of those.
• 13:48
  Speaker 6: 33 guineas.
• 13:48
  Speaker 9: 33 guineas?
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: That's a bit steep.
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: Costly. Like so many of my machines, it is, at present,
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: vastly more expensive than a human servant it replaces.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 13:59
  Speaker 4: Fortunately for me, my things are fashionable among the far-sighted.
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: Did you know that on King Edward's yacht he has
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: no less than three electric refrigerators?
• 14:08
  Speaker 10: One just for champagne.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: Really? Ah, here, here. Here are the letters.
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: Living room is through there.
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: Door, of course, is automatic. I just press this button here. So...
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: And if you go to see her today, I will
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: kill you. That's the last, and it came this morning. Aye. Golly. Look,
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: have you a glass of whiskey?
• 14:33
  Speaker 6: I think I need one.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: Of course. Watch this.
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: I call it my invisible footman.
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: You see the little rails on the floor?
• 14:39
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: Now, look at that metal cabinet over there. I press
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: this switch on the arm of my chair.
• 14:44
  Speaker 6: Good heavens.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: Now, this one.
• 14:47
  Speaker 6: Golly.
• 14:49
  Speaker 4: Do I take a drink off it?
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: No.
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: Oh!
• 14:56
  Speaker 4: Oh, heavens!
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: Smythe! Smythe, are you all right? It's still experimental. I
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: haven't got the circuits quite right. That's one disadvantage.
• 15:06
  Speaker 4: A human thought that wouldn't explode in a blue flash
• 15:08
  Speaker 4: and give off clouds of smoke.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: Oh, you haven't seen my uncle's butler.
• 15:11
  Speaker 9: Look, if you don't mind, I think I'll forget about
• 15:14
  Speaker 9: the whiskey and trot over to this Thrombo fellow. Too sweet, hmm?
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, right. This way.
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: Okay. Mr. Angus, I don't know how to... Don't think
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: nothing of it, old boy. Workers of the world unite,
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: you know. Aye, may the best man win. Eh? Look,
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: I see you've got one of these spyhole things in
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: the door.
• 15:30
  Speaker 8: Smythe, I beg you, open this door to no one
• 15:32
  Speaker 8: till I get back, hmm?
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: I won't.
• 15:34
  Speaker 6: Cheerio, then.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: I'll put the alarm on tonight.
• 15:39
  Speaker 10: Champagne Charlie is me name.
• 15:44
  Speaker 5: Champagne drinking is me game.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: Ah, madam's scrubbing away, I see.
• 15:50
  Speaker 6: Yes, sir, scrubbing.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: Did you know that one day you might be replaced
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: by a machine?
• 15:55
  Speaker 6: Oh, God.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: Well, but for the moment, I want you.
• 15:58
  Speaker 7: To take this with my best wishes for a happy
• 16:00
  Speaker 7: Christmas and a prosperous New Year.
• 16:02
  Speaker 6: Thank you, sir. Oh, oh, thank you.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: And when I come back, I shall give you another half-craft.
• 16:08
  Speaker 6: Another half-craft?
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Yes, because I want you to watch that door. And
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: if anyone tries to go in there, I want you
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: to nip down in the nip and tell the hall
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: porter immediately. Anyone. Do you understand?
• 16:18
  Speaker 10: Yes, sir.
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: Splendid. Compliments of the season, hmm?
• 16:22
  Speaker 6: Flipping tops.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: Oh, well, at least the snow has stopped.
• 16:30
  Speaker 6: Yes.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: You see, I am from the south, Mr.
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: Angus.
• 16:33
  Speaker 10: I do not share your northern taste for winter weather. So,
• 16:38
  Speaker 10: you told Smythe to open the door to no one.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 16:42
  Speaker 10: And you sent the cleaning woman on sentry duty.
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: What else?
• 16:45
  Speaker 8: Well, I also warmed the whole porch, of course. Oh,
• 16:48
  Speaker 8: and the hot chestnut man outside. Oh, and best of all,
• 16:50
  Speaker 8: there was a policeman outside. I explained everything to him.
• 16:53
  Speaker 6: And he agreed to keep guard.
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: You did well.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Mr. Clampard. You see, there's the hot chestnut man.
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: And that's the policeman with him. You'll be able to.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: It's Father Brown.
• 17:04
  Speaker 10: It's Father Brown.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: Oh, Laura?
• 17:06
  Speaker 3: Hello.
• 17:07
  Speaker 6: Laura?
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: What are you doing here? Why have you brought this
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: gentleman with you? Oh, Miss Laura insisted on coming. I
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: should explain. She told me the whole story.
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: And she thought she would tell Welkin if he turned
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: up at Smythe's flat that she had no intention of
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: marrying Smythe. And I, yes, I just tagged along to
• 17:25
  Speaker 3: give her moral support.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: We've only been here a couple of minutes. We came
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: on the penny omnibus. Oh, do have a chestnut.
• 17:31
  Speaker 3: They're very good.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: No, merci. No, thank you. Oh, yes, Constable. There we are.
• 17:36
  Speaker 7: Thanks, sir.
• 17:37
  Speaker 6: And you didn't see anyone go in, did you, Constable?
• 17:40
  Speaker 3: No, miss.
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: Not a soul, sir. Good. Well, all seems well.
• 17:46
  Speaker 10: We'll just go in and double-check with the whole porter,
• 17:48
  Speaker 10: and then we'll go up and see Mr.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: Smythe.
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: I say, Flambeau, take a look at these footprints.
• 17:54
  Speaker 8: Which ones?
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: These ones here, going in.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: And these ones coming out. Oh, yes.
• 18:01
  Speaker 10: They seem to be the same person.
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: An extremely heavy man, or he could.
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: Be carrying a load. Yes.
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: Good, firm stride.
• 18:11
  Speaker 10: Good workmanlike boots with hobnails. I read an excellent monograph
• 18:16
  Speaker 10: on footprints when I was first setting up to be
• 18:18
  Speaker 10: a detective.
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: They're very clear.
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
• 18:23
  Speaker 3: That's what struck me.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: I fear we may be too late. Let's see the hall, Porter.
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: Would you come with us, Constable? Oh, yes.
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: A very ingenious gentleman, Mr.
• 18:35
  Speaker 5: Smythe.
• 18:36
  Speaker 10: He rigged up this telephone system from his room upstairs
• 18:40
  Speaker 10: down here to my desk.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: Anyway, gents, and madam, you can take it from me.
• 18:49
  Speaker 7: Nobody's been in since this young gentleman went away.
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: Then what are these patches of melting snow leaving upstairs? Yes. Yes, see,
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: the snow has hardly melted despite the warmth here.
• 19:01
  Speaker 10: These footprints were made within the last few minutes.
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: God, the invisible man.
• 19:06
  Speaker 10: Father, you stay down here with Miss Lower.
• 19:09
  Speaker 6: Mr.
• 19:09
  Speaker 5: Angus, will you come up with me?
• 19:10
  Speaker 7: Of course.
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: All right, then.
• 19:12
  Speaker 7: Better go with them, sir.
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: Yes, sir.
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: Constable, just a moment. Yes, sir.
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: Could I just have a word, please? No.
• 19:24
  Speaker 10: After the ball is over, after the brawling.
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: There, you see the wet marks lead straight to his door.
• 19:33
  Speaker 6: No one went in. Can I have me half-crown now, sir?
• 19:36
  Speaker 10: And see, look there, faint of marks coming out. As
• 19:39
  Speaker 10: Father Brown said, we may be too late.
• 19:41
  Speaker 6: What about me half-crown?
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: Smythe?
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: Smythe!
• 19:46
  Speaker 5: Are you all right?
• 19:47
  Speaker 6: Two shillings and sixpence.
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: I have to break the door down.
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: There is an easier way.
• 19:52
  Speaker 10: I have my skeleton keys.
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: Be careful.
• 19:55
  Speaker 9: What's the matter?
• 19:56
  Speaker 6: Ah, voilà.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: Good.
• 20:00
  Speaker 10: I haven't lost my touch.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: Well, that's strange. Smythe has an electrical alarm. He said
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: he was putting it on. Yes, I know the kind
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: of thing.
• 20:07
  Speaker 10: There's usually a switch somewhere up there, but it's up.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: Look, it's a tiny flat. I'll try the kitchen. You
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: try the living room, would you?
• 20:17
  Speaker 7: Yes.
• 20:20
  Speaker 10: Mon Dieu!
• 20:22
  Speaker 7: What's the matter?
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Look, there on the carpet, a trail of blood.
• 20:25
  Speaker 10: Someone must be wounded or dead.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: Where's the body?
• 20:32
  Speaker 10: I simply do not understand it. There are but four rooms.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: All of them we have searched thoroughly.
• 20:37
  Speaker 10: The body must be somewhere.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 20:39
  Speaker 10: We must get Father Brown up here.
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: What, the little priest? Yes, yes, yes.
• 20:42
  Speaker 10: We'll call him on that internal telephone thing.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: Yes, here it is.
• 20:47
  Speaker 10: Allo, is that the concierge? I mean, you know, the
• 20:51
  Speaker 10: whole porter, eh?
• 20:52
  Speaker 7: That's good.
• 20:53
  Speaker 10: Look, this is Mr.
• 20:54
  Speaker 6: Flambeau, one of the gentlemen in Mr.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: Smythe's flat.
• 20:57
  Speaker 10: Would you kindly ask Father Brown to come up, hmm?
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Oh, and the policeman, yes, please. Ah, he's not there?
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: Well, just Father Brown.
• 21:06
  Speaker 6: There, eh?
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: Well, here we are.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: Ah, Father Blount.
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: Ah, yes, I'm sorry about the policeman. I sent him
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: off on an errand. Laura, why don't you come up
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: here as well? It's not a pretty sight, you know.
• 21:22
  Speaker 6: I wanted to know what happened.
• 21:23
  Speaker 10: Yes, well, so do we.
• 21:25
  Speaker 7: Come forward.
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: Oh, thank you, sir.
• 21:27
  Speaker 10: You'll notice, Father, the wet footprints. They come right into
• 21:30
  Speaker 10: the flat.
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: But why were you interested in the footprints outside?
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: Ah, yes, well, they were the only ones that weren't
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: partially obscured by snow. They were made after it stopped.
• 21:40
  Speaker 5: Um.
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: Do you mind if I just pop her about?
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, of course.
• 21:43
  Speaker 10: Just go ahead.
• 21:45
  Speaker 3: Ah.
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: Ah, now, this is interesting. What is it? We didn't
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: think any of those papers were relevant.
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: No, no, no, they're not. This, um... This one, um...
• 21:59
  Speaker 3: This might interest you, Miss Laura.
• 22:02
  Speaker 6: Mm-hmm.
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: Here.
• 22:04
  Speaker 6: Oh, thank you, Father.
• 22:06
  Speaker 7: Excuse me.
• 22:07
  Speaker 6: Excuse me. All right, I'll come in, sir.
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: Oh, yes, yes, yes, sir.
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: Constable, do come in.
• 22:11
  Speaker 8: We arrested him, as you suggested, sir.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: Well done, well done. You've acted very promptly. Thank you, sir.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: He confessed at once. We're going to drag the canal
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: for the body. Good, good. So the little priest triumphs again. Look,
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: will someone please explain? You've caught the invisible man. Oh,
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: only mentally invisible, Mr.
• 22:33
  Speaker 3: Angus.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: What?
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: You know how rich people never notice the presence of servants?
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: They take them for granted.
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: To them, they are invisible. Yes, but do some. I've
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: had no servants.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: Ah, well, there are public servants as well as domestic servants.
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: When those four honest people said that no one had
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: gone into the mansions or the flat, they meant no
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: one they noticed.
• 22:52
  Speaker 5: And, Miss Laura.
• 22:53
  Speaker 3: There was something you said to me which wasn't true. What?
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: I say, Father.
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: No, no, don't be annoyed. She thought it was true.
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: But there can't be no one in the street outside
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: just after a letter has been delivered.
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: And then, of course, there was the stamp paper. Look,
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: I can't stand it anymore. Who is this fellow? What
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: does he look like?
• 23:16
  Speaker 10: What is the usual get-up of a mentally invisible man?
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: Oh, he's dressed.
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: Rather handsomely in red, blue, and gold. And in this
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: striking and even showy costume. He entered Himalayan mansions under
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: eight human eyes.
• 23:30
  Speaker 7: What?
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: Yes, he killed Smythe in cold blood after Smythe opened
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: the door to him, and he came down into the
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: street again, carrying the dead body over his shoulder.
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: Dear Father Brown, are you raving mad, or am I?
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: You're not mad, only a little, unobservant. James Welkin was
• 23:47
  Speaker 3: dressed as a postman.
• 23:49
  Speaker 10: So it was Welkin after all.
• 23:51
  Speaker 3: See, nobody ever notices postmen somehow, yet they.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: Have passions like other men.
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: And don't they carry large sacks where a small corpse
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: can be stowed quite easily? Have you ever noticed this,
• 24:05
  Speaker 3: that people never answer what you say? They answer what
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: you mean or what they think you mean. You see,
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: suppose one lady says to another in a country house,
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: is anybody staying with you? The lady doesn't answer, yes,
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: the butler, the three-foot man, the parlour maid and so on,
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: though the parlour maid may be in the room, or
• 24:23
  Speaker 3: the butler behind her chair. She says, there's nobody staying
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: with us, meaning nobody of the sort you need. Now,
• 24:30
  Speaker 3: suppose a doctor inquiring into an epidemic asks who is
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: staying in the house. Then the lady will remember the butler,
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: the parlor maid, and the rest. Yes, all language is
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: used like that. You never get a question answered literally,
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: even when you get it answered truly. And when these
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: four quite honest people said that no man had gone
• 24:50
  Speaker 3: into the mansions, they didn't really mean that no man
• 24:53
  Speaker 3: had gone into them. They meant no man whom they
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: could suspect of being your man. A man did go
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: into the house and did come out of it, but
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: they never met. Noticed it.
• 25:04
  Speaker 6: Oh, absolutely horrid. Let's talk about something else. Oh, look here.
• 25:09
  Speaker 6: Smythe's patent waste disposal system. The dustman you don't have
• 25:14
  Speaker 6: to tick. Let's try.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: This paper will do.
• 25:18
  Speaker 6: Laura! Here's the button.
• 25:20
  Speaker 10: Extraordinary.
• 25:27
  Speaker 6: And now, Mr. Angus.
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: Yes?
• 25:30
  Speaker 6: Don't you find it close in here?
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: Close?
• 25:33
  Speaker 6: Would you care for a walk in the park?
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Yes, very much. Excuse us, gentlemen.
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: Excuse us.
• 25:49
  Speaker 3: Goodbye, Mr.
• 25:49
  Speaker 6: Flumbo.
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: Mademoiselle.
• 25:51
  Speaker 6: Father Brown.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: Goodbye, Miss Laura.
• 25:56
  Speaker 10: Now, tell me, Father Brown, what was on the paper, huh?
• 25:59
  Speaker 10: I thought you said it was important, yet she threw
• 26:01
  Speaker 10: it away.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: Yes, yes, it could have been important to some people,
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: I suppose. It was Isidore Smythe's will. He left her everything,
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: one and a half million pounds. One and a half
• 26:11
  Speaker 3: million pounds. But I don't think Miss Laura would wish
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: to be wealthy. After all, didn't she say she was
• 26:16
  Speaker 3: determined that the man she would marry would, what was
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: the phrase, would have to carve his own way in
• 26:22
  Speaker 3: the world?
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: What a challenge.
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: The young Mr.
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: Angus.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: In The Invisible Man by G.K. Chesterton, the part of
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: Father Brown was played by Andrew Sachs, Flambeau, Olivier Pierre, Laura,
• 26:46
  Speaker 1: Eileen Tully, John Turnbull Angus, Anthony Hyde, Isidore Smythe, Michael Drew,
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: Mrs Wilkins and Charlady Margot Boyd, policeman Peter Aker, urchin
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: Melinda Walker. The Invisible Man was adapted by John Scottney
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: and directed in Bristol by Alec Reid.
• 27:11
  Speaker 10: Our next week's story is The Honour of Israel Gow,
• 27:15
  Speaker 10: in which Father Brown surveys the remnants of a battered
• 27:18
  Speaker 10: corpse and talks of money.