Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 2 - Episode 137 - The unwritten rules that rule us!

Transcript

Season 2 - Episode 137 - The unwritten rules that rule us! · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

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  Welcome to the good morning from the chicken coop, podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and master mindset.
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  Coach filled with inspiration, distinctions, perspectives and
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  possibilities. We help you to cultivate a
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  mindset that leads you to create the best version of yourself.
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  You could ever imagine join Kim. Every morning from one of her.
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  Favorite happy places her chicken coop, along with all her
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  chickens. Hey everybody.
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  Good morning from the chicken coop.
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  We are talking about the rules that are Unwritten, that rule,
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  us sounds kind of crazy, right? We have rules that are Unwritten
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  meaning, we are unaware of them, but they rule us regularly.
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  They do, they really drive us and they are the force behind
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  our decisions. But yes, that is true.
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  And, you know, we have talked before about Concepts about this
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  in many different ways, but these are, these are kind of
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  tricky because these are things that we live by We don't
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  actually know our rules until they show up.
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  So an example of something silly might be how you load the
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  dishwasher. So you have an unconscious rule
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  that says every time you open the bottom pull out of the
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  dishwasher the plates have to go in a certain spot in a certain
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  direction and the silverware has to go in a certain spot in a
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  certain direction and you have all of these different aspects
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  of rules that at our protocol for the dishwasher.
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  Well, what happens when somebody else comes in your house and
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  they're helping you clean up and they don't do it the way you do
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  it or even people in your house don't do it the way you do it
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  and you get irritated and you find that you are getting
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  irritated and you use language like they're not loading the
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  dishwasher, the right way. That is a key for an Unwritten
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  rule because as far as I know the reddish washer did not come
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  with a manual that said how to load it properly.
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  Directions of certain things might have set explained how to
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  use the Jets, but it did not explain other aspects of it.
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  So there would be a Unwritten rule.
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  That's being driven. And for me, let me explain to
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  you why I use that one, because I definitely have an Unwritten
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  rule about how to load the dishwasher just like how to do
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  laundry. Just like how to make a bed.
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  I have lots of rules around things when it comes to order.
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  Now, those things I was I would I was honestly never aware of
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  them until I had other people in my life and then it became an
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  issue because you're not doing it the right way.
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  And then the questions would always be relied as if the right
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  way. It's just your way, that doesn't
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  mean it's the right way and those are valid points and my
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  reaction to those used to be much more on resourceful than
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  they are now. But the point is these this game
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  of rules is not just about the dishwasher.
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  Now used it as a Example to make everybody laugh.
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  However, there are parts of this that come up all the time in our
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  world and what's so imperative. And so important that, we pay
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  attention to is these show up in our work life, they show up in
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  our relationships. They show up in everything that
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  we do and if we're not conscious of what we are thinking about
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  and what are Unwritten rules are we will forever be taken
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  advantage of in our own consciousness.
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  By the stuff that we haven't worked through.
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  So, when you start to have conflict with other people, you
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  have to ask yourself. Am I running into a rule that I
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  didn't know anything about? Is there something here that I
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  need to check in with myself about?
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  And that's what this is really about today.
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  When conflict arises, when things show up, when you have
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  these elements of your life that are present, you have to always
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  come back to. What is my role in?
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  Us and how is my reaction? And how is my belief, and how is
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  my tonality? How is my structure, dictating
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  an outcome here? That I'm clearly not happy with,
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  and I'm not enjoying because, obviously, if I'm in Conflict,
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  well, this is something I have to look at now on the flip side
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  of this, this works in the positive to like, you have all
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  these things that go on behind the scenes.
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  And it could be that, you know, you don't know, all these little
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  things that make you happy. And then someone does them and
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  you're like, oh, this makes me so happy but it's not something
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  you ever realized about yourself.
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  And it there's just a little tiny piece of it that says, oh
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  yeah. That's wonderful.
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  And then now you have awareness of it.
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  It's now gone from something that you were unaware of to
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  something that you are aware of. And, you know, when you know
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  better, you can do better as Maya.
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  Angelou says, when you know better, you can do better, but
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  if you don't know, you're just going to be subjected to.
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  The existence that's unconscious and probably not cultivated in a
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  way that you would particularly like so today I'm going to ask
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  you to look for the rules. What are your Unwritten rules?
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  What are the things that you do not know about that?
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  You want to bring into your Consciousness so that you can
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  cultivate them that you can fix them that you can grow them, or
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  Shrink them and make them something that is a useful tool
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  as opposed to something that is a nuisance tool.
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  I hope you guys have a very blessed day and I will see you
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  all tomorrow. Bye.
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  I hope you guys have a very blessed day and I will see you
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  all tomorrow. Bye.