Latest / Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans / On The Love Boat with Below Deck Med Star Captain Sandy and Her Wife Leah

Transcript

On The Love Boat with Below Deck Med Star Captain Sandy and Her Wife Leah · Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans

0:15
Speaker 1: Hey there, folks, say, welcome to I Do Part two
0:19
Speaker 1: and if you got love right the first time around,
0:21
Speaker 1: this show ain't for you. Welcome. I'm TJ. Holmes alongside
0:26
Speaker 1: my dear lovely, my fiance and my co host on
0:28
Speaker 1: this show. It's Amy Roboch and we are we are
0:32
Speaker 1: losing it a little bit on this one because we
0:34
Speaker 1: have a couple of guests since Studio one we are
0:36
Speaker 1: very familiar with one we just met now the one
0:38
Speaker 1: we're very familiar with, Robes is that this goes beyond
0:42
Speaker 1: just being a fan of the show.
0:44
Speaker 2: Oh Captain Sandy and below Deck got us through some
0:47
Speaker 2: of the darkest times of our lives. That's when we
0:52
Speaker 2: were hiding out from the world literally and had nowhere
0:56
Speaker 2: to go. You know where we turned to super honest,
1:03
Speaker 2: I am telling you. We go back and we think
1:06
Speaker 2: of the show, and we think of the episodes, and
1:08
Speaker 2: as we watch new ones, we remember how much your
1:12
Speaker 2: show literally helped us escape our own tumult and for
1:16
Speaker 2: that we are grateful.
1:18
Speaker 3: Thank you. It's a great show, right, It's amazing show.
1:21
Speaker 2: Yes, all the places you can be, but all the
1:24
Speaker 2: drama that ensues, but all the fun that's had in
1:27
Speaker 2: the process.
1:28
Speaker 1: But we are joining. This is I Do Part two. Now,
1:31
Speaker 1: this is just regular Amy and TJ podcast. We would
1:34
Speaker 1: just be talking to Captain Sandy. No, no, no, no, we're talking
1:36
Speaker 1: relationships here on I Do Part two and you are
1:39
Speaker 1: sitting here. We are all sitting in studio together. You
1:43
Speaker 1: here with your wife of two years. Now. Yeah, Leah,
1:46
Speaker 1: it is so good to meet you.
1:48
Speaker 4: Thank you.
1:48
Speaker 5: Nice to be here two years.
1:49
Speaker 1: When was the anniversary?
1:50
Speaker 2: Now?
1:50
Speaker 1: I want to get it right. Just had it right,
1:52
Speaker 1: do you know?
1:52
Speaker 3: Yeah? I love it.
1:53
Speaker 5: Good job.
1:56
Speaker 1: Yeah, wait a minute, that that didn't come from nowhere.
2:00
Speaker 5: But we've been together seven years?
2:01
Speaker 1: Okay? Is she not good with dates? Usually?
2:04
Speaker 5: Amazing?
2:05
Speaker 2: Okay, I mean she's a captain. I would think numbers
2:08
Speaker 2: like precision are kind of really important with the jobs directions.
2:12
Speaker 3: I know where we park her car.
2:14
Speaker 5: I did do the wedding. Yeah, yeah, she just showed
2:17
Speaker 5: up for the wedding.
2:18
Speaker 3: I did all that.
2:20
Speaker 2: That's amazing. I mean, you have to have a planner
2:22
Speaker 2: and you have to have an executor.
2:23
Speaker 3: The two together work perfectly.
2:25
Speaker 2: Happy Pride Month, by the way, you New York obviously
2:28
Speaker 2: knows how to do it right. Any plans to celebrate
2:31
Speaker 2: do you guys get into all of the festivities and celebrations.
2:36
Speaker 4: Right, I mean, we keep to ourselves a lot. We
2:40
Speaker 4: have a very tight group of people that we hang
2:42
Speaker 4: out with, so we like nice dinners, We love the
2:44
Speaker 4: shop and.
2:46
Speaker 6: I did a Bravo Pride float.
2:54
Speaker 3: Float.
2:54
Speaker 6: And I think when we show up in life together
2:57
Speaker 6: and hold hands, we're showing everyone it's like to be
3:00
Speaker 6: in a stance.
3:01
Speaker 5: Yes, absolutely, that's not That is cool.
3:04
Speaker 1: You can you can send a message without saying a word.
3:07
Speaker 1: We always think that you all probably do. You probably
3:10
Speaker 1: get it sometimes to worry. Why don't you do this more?
3:13
Speaker 1: Say this more? And why isn't this enough you? That's
3:16
Speaker 1: a very good point and worth wanting us living our lives.
3:18
Speaker 6: Ye, loving each other exactly, no judgment and just you know,
3:22
Speaker 6: we're two normal people that happen to be in love.
3:25
Speaker 3: It's two souls.
3:27
Speaker 2: Yes, Oh, I mean look in here in New York City. Obviously,
3:30
Speaker 2: this is a city that embraces all kinds of love.
3:33
Speaker 2: Whatever it looks like, however it manifests. How is it
3:36
Speaker 2: for you all in I don't know where we're I
3:38
Speaker 2: don't know if you want to even say where you
3:39
Speaker 2: live or where you reside. But have you ever felt
3:42
Speaker 2: uncomfortable or discomfort holding hands in public, showing affection in public?
3:46
Speaker 2: Or is that in years past and today things are good.
3:51
Speaker 4: I mean, I'm just aware, like I always say, read
3:54
Speaker 4: the room, you know, to be honest with you. I
3:56
Speaker 4: come from a very conservative family. I was a gospel
3:58
Speaker 4: singer for thirty years, worship leader, and so I came
4:01
Speaker 4: from the Christian industry. I lost my career when I
4:04
Speaker 4: came out actually overnight. So I mean, I'm aware that
4:08
Speaker 4: we're not going to like make out in a very
4:11
Speaker 4: conservative you know room, and then when we walk the streets,
4:14
Speaker 4: I'll grab our Hannah shall hold my hand.
4:16
Speaker 5: So you know we're respectful, you know, I feel that.
4:23
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yes, But there's no weirdness or anything where
4:27
Speaker 4: we live. I mean, you know, if they have a
4:30
Speaker 4: problem with it, it's their problem.
4:32
Speaker 1: One of the two of you more naturally affectionate than
4:35
Speaker 1: the other.
4:35
Speaker 5: Though we're all over each other. We are too, by
4:39
Speaker 5: the way, Yeah.
4:41
Speaker 6: We're in Yeah, so that you know touches love right,
4:45
Speaker 6: So I don't know. I to me, it's like I
4:47
Speaker 6: want to know my person loves me, and I want
4:50
Speaker 6: them to know I love them.
4:51
Speaker 2: Yeah, physical touch is important everything. We've actually had some
4:54
Speaker 2: stuff said about us because they said we were overly affectionate,
4:57
Speaker 2: which was completely embellished. But yes, we also understand you
5:01
Speaker 2: have to read the room. So you all met through
5:04
Speaker 2: social media. Can you tell me how you all met
5:06
Speaker 2: and how it all, how the romance all began?
5:08
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I mean, I mean I turned on the show.
5:11
Speaker 4: I didn't really watch the show a lot, and I thought, oh,
5:14
Speaker 4: she's hot. I'm just going to message and be like hey,
5:18
Speaker 4: and so I said many blessings, congrats on your show,
5:21
Speaker 4: and that was it. And then six months later.
5:23
Speaker 3: You reached back messages.
5:25
Speaker 2: These are dms. Damn, I'm the same way. I'll be like,
5:28
Speaker 2: oh my god. Six months of messaging so you finally see.
5:31
Speaker 6: Yes, and her stood out because it said many blessings.
5:34
Speaker 6: And then I clicked on a link and she was
5:36
Speaker 6: singing and I was like, wow, she can sing.
5:40
Speaker 3: And then we reached out and then we.
5:42
Speaker 5: Met in La. Yeah, it was love at first sight.
5:46
Speaker 1: Okay, oh right, I have so many questions. Yeah, this story, Now,
5:50
Speaker 1: how much time you saw it? After six months you
5:52
Speaker 1: saw the message, but then how long between writing her
5:56
Speaker 1: bag that you will actually see each other.
5:59
Speaker 3: Wow.
6:00
Speaker 1: So, yeah, in La? And what was that in La? Okay?
6:04
Speaker 6: And she was in Colorado, Okay. And she was coming
6:07
Speaker 6: to visit family in La or Orange County somewhere.
6:11
Speaker 5: I'm from Orange County in California.
6:12
Speaker 1: We met how that first meeting date? What was it?
6:15
Speaker 2: Well?
6:16
Speaker 3: I asked her if she wanted to go to the
6:17
Speaker 3: movies at ten o'clock at night.
6:18
Speaker 4: She was so nervous. It was so cute. She's like,
6:21
Speaker 4: you want to go buy a chicken?
6:23
Speaker 3: Chicken?
6:26
Speaker 5: You want to go see the Queens? Is so cute?
6:29
Speaker 3: Go see what movie was it?
6:30
Speaker 5: I don't know. It was like that Queen's movie.
6:32
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, And I'm like, movie, oh yeah.
6:36
Speaker 1: You go to a movie that night?
6:38
Speaker 5: It's no, we know.
6:40
Speaker 3: We went to Bristol Farms.
6:41
Speaker 5: Then she does walk.
6:46
Speaker 4: Really fast and I'm in my high heels and I'm like,
6:48
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm trying to keep up.
6:50
Speaker 5: It was cute.
6:51
Speaker 1: So how do things progress? How did you get from
6:53
Speaker 1: there to being married now? Like you said, seven years ago, though.
6:56
Speaker 6: Conversations, talking, communicating, just stay in touch and realizing this
7:02
Speaker 6: was love.
7:03
Speaker 5: Yeah, it was fast. I mean it was pretty fast.
7:06
Speaker 5: I'm not going to lie.
7:07
Speaker 3: I mean it wasn't a U haul it it.
7:09
Speaker 5: Was a writer trap.
7:12
Speaker 2: It's amazing.
7:13
Speaker 5: Yeah, we literally drove from La through all the way
7:18
Speaker 5: to Colorado because that's where I lived at the time.
7:21
Speaker 1: I'm laughing because I only understand that joke recently, because
7:24
Speaker 1: I explained though U hal.
7:27
Speaker 2: Lesbians fall in love, they want to move in right away.
7:30
Speaker 2: They get the U haul after the first date and
7:32
Speaker 2: wahla writer Leah, you were married before for twenty years
7:40
Speaker 2: to a man. Yes, So what were you looking for?
7:43
Speaker 2: Did you think you could find love again? Were you
7:45
Speaker 2: on a mission to find love?
7:47
Speaker 4: I was so sad and felt so trapped, and because
7:51
Speaker 4: I was a gospel artist, it was like couples that
7:54
Speaker 4: pray together stay together. And I thought, this is just
7:57
Speaker 4: torture to me. And I have adopted a daughter at
8:01
Speaker 4: birth and she was beautiful. She's twenty now, but I
8:05
Speaker 4: had to stay in Colorado and raise her. So I
8:07
Speaker 4: told Sandy, I can't move back to California. I need
8:10
Speaker 4: to put my daughter first. I need to I can't
8:13
Speaker 4: take her from her friends and get her through school.
8:15
Speaker 4: And then so she said, I'm gonna I'm gonna move
8:18
Speaker 4: to Colorado and I'm like, what, you're going to move
8:21
Speaker 4: to Colorado? There's no water, really, there's no boats.
8:25
Speaker 5: And she did.
8:27
Speaker 4: She came and lasted five years. But yeah, I mean
8:30
Speaker 4: I came out to my husband at the time and
8:33
Speaker 4: just said I'm not happy and this is why, and
8:36
Speaker 4: we need to divorce, you know, and he did not easy.
8:41
Speaker 5: It was terrible. Yeah, it was the worst.
8:43
Speaker 4: It was the worst time in my life because I
8:46
Speaker 4: lost my identity. I had to start over. I was
8:50
Speaker 4: crucified by the church and front lost friends and it
8:54
Speaker 4: was horrible for me anyway.
8:57
Speaker 5: So she was supportive.
8:58
Speaker 6: But then she moved out of her big house because
9:01
Speaker 6: this is when you know, it's like real, right, it
9:03
Speaker 6: moves into this apartment and I'll never forget. We drove
9:06
Speaker 6: up and she just cried and I'm like, it's only
9:08
Speaker 6: temporary because she had a big house, a big life,
9:12
Speaker 6: obviously a big career. She lost everything, and now she's
9:15
Speaker 6: moving into an apartment that you would move into after
9:18
Speaker 6: you graduate college.
9:20
Speaker 2: The apartment after a divorce is almost always sad. Mine
9:24
Speaker 2: was your kind of was. Yes, we know that feeling.
9:28
Speaker 2: That's a huge adjustment, huge on every level, every level.
9:31
Speaker 2: And your kids are adjusting too. At the same time, How.
9:34
Speaker 3: Did your daughter here?
9:35
Speaker 2: She?
9:35
Speaker 4: I mean, I took her from her childhood home into
9:38
Speaker 4: this apartment, and so she's she's dogs and I had
9:41
Speaker 4: two dogs who were used to running on five acres,
9:43
Speaker 4: so they're like pooping pean on the floor.
9:45
Speaker 5: I'm like, oh my god, this is like a nightmare.
9:48
Speaker 5: But it was good. We got through it.
9:50
Speaker 4: And then one day it was snowing in Colorado and
9:53
Speaker 4: I'm in my uggs and I'm driving her to school,
9:56
Speaker 4: and I drive by townhouses for sale and I go
10:00
Speaker 4: and I go in, I put a deposit down on
10:02
Speaker 4: a piece of property and I buy my first townhouse. So,
10:06
Speaker 4: like I said, I was married twenty years before, so
10:09
Speaker 4: he was the provider and did everything. So I had
10:12
Speaker 4: to like relearn everything in life, you know.
10:14
Speaker 3: And because you've been a great gospel career.
10:17
Speaker 5: Because my gospel career, yeah, you know.
10:19
Speaker 4: But now I'm in the beauty industry and I love
10:21
Speaker 4: it and I'm launching my own product and it's just
10:23
Speaker 4: been I'm happier now in my life than I ever was,
10:27
Speaker 4: and I'm so in love and it's just I have
10:30
Speaker 4: a new family and it's great.
10:43
Speaker 1: This, I guess is it's adjacent, but a little off topic.
10:47
Speaker 1: I'm just curious. I have those folks who pushed you
10:49
Speaker 1: out in the church and all these soil have has
10:52
Speaker 1: that softened any and been welcomed back, have any of
10:55
Speaker 1: those relationships.
10:56
Speaker 4: It's interesting that some of them have come out to
10:59
Speaker 4: me and said, hey, I'm sorry that I wasn't there
11:04
Speaker 4: for you. I'm struggling too, And I go, yeah, that's
11:07
Speaker 4: all good. You know. Actually my daughter came out to
11:09
Speaker 4: me that she's gay, and I thought, oh my gosh,
11:13
Speaker 4: like I thought, like I ruined her or I you
11:18
Speaker 4: know what I mean, like it was and she's living
11:20
Speaker 4: her authentic life.
11:21
Speaker 5: I'm living my authentic life.
11:23
Speaker 4: I've forgiven the people who cast me aside. Most of
11:27
Speaker 4: them are closet something you know, in the churches. So
11:32
Speaker 4: it's hard. But it's hard for me to go to
11:34
Speaker 4: church now. I mean I miss it, but to think
11:38
Speaker 4: I'm not allowed to be on the platform, like it's
11:40
Speaker 4: just a trigger. So I just don't really go to church.
11:43
Speaker 3: Because God loves all of us just.
11:46
Speaker 1: What we were told.
11:47
Speaker 5: Yes, that's what we're told.
11:49
Speaker 2: What Jesus do, not what a lot of churches do
11:52
Speaker 2: when they see something that they don't think fits their something.
11:57
Speaker 6: Yeah, wise she goes when the church fails, that's because
12:00
Speaker 6: the people worship.
12:01
Speaker 5: The man and not Yes, for sure, that church.
12:03
Speaker 3: Should never fail.
12:04
Speaker 6: And so basically it's like it's so stupid and I
12:08
Speaker 6: I just it's like, it's love period.
12:11
Speaker 3: Forget it. Don't think about sex. Why do people got
12:13
Speaker 3: to go there?
12:14
Speaker 2: Like, right, that's such a good way to look at it. Yes,
12:17
Speaker 2: it's about love. It's not about the sexual act. That's
12:20
Speaker 2: just what happens when you express your love talking about
12:24
Speaker 2: who you love. Sandy, this was your this is your
12:27
Speaker 2: first marriage. Correct, So did you feel any reservation? Did
12:30
Speaker 2: you think marriage was in the cards? And once you
12:32
Speaker 2: get to a certain point you might find that.
12:33
Speaker 3: Leah, really yes, I was like I'm going.
12:36
Speaker 5: To marry her, Yeah, instantly.
12:38
Speaker 2: And you've never thought that before?
12:40
Speaker 1: No?
12:40
Speaker 3: Wow, really I just didn't think.
12:43
Speaker 6: You know, it wasn't really a thing, you know, obviously,
12:47
Speaker 6: I just love the person I love and I was like,
12:50
Speaker 6: why do we need to get married?
12:51
Speaker 3: Now? I know why? Wow?
12:54
Speaker 5: Yeah? I took her name and everything. Yeah, it was
12:56
Speaker 5: so cute. Though.
12:57
Speaker 4: She brought me, bought me a promise ring. I was like,
13:00
Speaker 4: promise ring, I want, I want the real.
13:03
Speaker 5: Ring you got me. Yeah, it was a Tiffany and
13:09
Speaker 5: surprised me in Great Greece.
13:11
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh, Cindy.
13:12
Speaker 2: I think it's so cool too, because I think the
13:14
Speaker 2: part of the podcast is that either you've you've you've
13:17
Speaker 2: tried something it didn't work, and people really do lose hope.
13:20
Speaker 2: I think when you lose hope, that's that's just that
13:22
Speaker 2: dark place that I think many of us have been in.
13:25
Speaker 2: What would you say to anyone who's out there thinking
13:28
Speaker 2: I'm past my prime? Who's gonna want this? You know,
13:31
Speaker 2: I've waited too long? What hope is there?
13:34
Speaker 6: Who you live in your life for? You live in
13:37
Speaker 6: it for everybody else or yourself. That's what I say, Like,
13:40
Speaker 6: live your life for yourself. Obviously, be kind and do
13:43
Speaker 6: the next right thing, but don't base your decisions based
13:46
Speaker 6: on what other people think about you or what you're
13:48
Speaker 6: afraid they're gonna they're gonna judge. You live your life
13:51
Speaker 6: because you're living it truly, and that's love.
13:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, yeah, I wish well. I think maybe on
13:59
Speaker 2: social people can see how the two of you look
14:01
Speaker 2: at each other. It's really beautiful to know that you've
14:03
Speaker 2: been together for seven years and you still look at
14:05
Speaker 2: each other that way. That's pretty cool. You this is
14:09
Speaker 2: a long distance relationship though. I mean, obviously, Captain Sandy,
14:12
Speaker 2: we watch you traveling the world in the most beautiful,
14:15
Speaker 2: amazing places, but very far away from Leah.
14:18
Speaker 3: How do you all manage that face?
14:21
Speaker 4: Yeah, FaceTime, it comes over. Yeah, I go at the end.
14:26
Speaker 4: But we're both you know, independent entrepreneur you know, entrepreneurial women,
14:31
Speaker 4: and so you know, I'm focusing on my business, and
14:33
Speaker 4: I have my daughter that comes and visits and stuff, and.
14:36
Speaker 3: Then I come over and see her, have my family.
14:39
Speaker 4: And my fam our families in Jacksonville. You know, our sister,
14:42
Speaker 4: my sister in law, Michelle Dunham. She's amazing, and so
14:46
Speaker 4: it's great. I mean, we have such a great community.
14:48
Speaker 3: I'm not gone that long.
14:50
Speaker 5: A couple of months, yeah, yeah, I was just too bad.
14:52
Speaker 1: How does it work in a twelve month period? How much?
14:54
Speaker 1: How often are you?
14:56
Speaker 6: Like, if it wasn't for Bravo or Blowdeck, I would
14:58
Speaker 6: be gone a long time.
15:00
Speaker 3: You know.
15:01
Speaker 6: Back in the day when I started, I was gone
15:03
Speaker 6: all year. I didn't see my family for years, like
15:05
Speaker 6: it was rare.
15:06
Speaker 5: It's not like that now.
15:07
Speaker 6: No, the industry has changed, like it's three months on,
15:10
Speaker 6: three months off.
15:11
Speaker 3: The bigger boats. The boats are getting bigger. The crew.
15:13
Speaker 3: If you want quality crew, you better let.
15:15
Speaker 6: Them have a life. And back in the day when
15:18
Speaker 6: I started, we didn't have lives.
15:20
Speaker 1: Wow.
15:20
Speaker 6: Right, So it's like your life was the boat life,
15:23
Speaker 6: and now it's changed.
15:25
Speaker 2: Cindy, do you think your love life got put on
15:27
Speaker 2: hold because of the career you chose?
15:30
Speaker 6: Of course, yeah. I mean it's so transient, you know.
15:33
Speaker 6: But the great thing about this career, first of all,
15:36
Speaker 6: there are plenty of jobs in the maritime industry. Secondly,
15:39
Speaker 6: you travel the world and you meet some really interesting people. Thirdly,
15:43
Speaker 6: your shoulder to shoulder with the billionaires you learn I
15:46
Speaker 6: learned so much. Most of those conversations to their companies
15:50
Speaker 6: happened on the bridge of the vessel. I learned a
15:52
Speaker 6: lot from those billionaires. And you travel the world. But
15:57
Speaker 6: at the same time you meet obviously, if you watch
16:00
Speaker 6: below deck, that's how it is, you hook up, your break.
16:03
Speaker 5: Up the net.
16:06
Speaker 3: It's a boatman's So.
16:08
Speaker 2: Did you have boat I was going to ask you,
16:10
Speaker 2: did you ever mix business and pleasure?
16:12
Speaker 6: Because I came up and yawning very differently where I
16:15
Speaker 6: worked for one person and he taught me everything. I
16:18
Speaker 6: went to c school, you know, I could save my
16:20
Speaker 6: life like a lot of stuff engineering school. And then
16:24
Speaker 6: I became a captain under him, so I never really
16:27
Speaker 6: had to work like they did.
16:29
Speaker 3: I was. I was the boat slave.
16:32
Speaker 2: You bosin or that was the boat slave.
16:35
Speaker 6: I send the chief stew the laundry girl, the dishwasher.
16:41
Speaker 6: I was not the chef because Fran cooked, so she
16:44
Speaker 6: just bought extra pots and pants so she didn't have
16:46
Speaker 6: to watch those.
16:47
Speaker 3: So they have it easier than I had it.
16:50
Speaker 2: That makes sense, though, and that's why you feel comfortable
16:52
Speaker 2: making the decisions you do on the show because you've
16:54
Speaker 2: been there, done that.
16:55
Speaker 6: Yes, And trust me, if they want to know what
16:58
Speaker 6: hard work is like, come back to the day is
17:00
Speaker 6: when I started both that's hard work.
17:03
Speaker 1: And again you go back and watch these you don't
17:06
Speaker 1: know a lot of what's going on in the drama
17:07
Speaker 1: until you see it.
17:08
Speaker 3: No, I want to.
17:10
Speaker 1: But once you see it, why in God's name are
17:13
Speaker 1: they doing? Are they just kids having fun and this
17:15
Speaker 1: is gonna be over with and let them get it
17:17
Speaker 1: out of their systems? Or do you see some real
17:19
Speaker 1: relationship issues mistakes? Being made. Are they any real relationships?
17:24
Speaker 1: Lessons to be taken out of what we see on
17:25
Speaker 1: the show.
17:26
Speaker 6: Some are in their twenties. When we were in our twenties,
17:29
Speaker 6: I mean I was still using drugs. I got clean
17:31
Speaker 6: at twenty five. But I mean, you know, they have
17:34
Speaker 6: different backgrounds. They're from different nationalities, different religions, different beliefs.
17:41
Speaker 6: So you think, Okay, I personally like to get to
17:44
Speaker 6: know them, So I try to have a meal with them.
17:47
Speaker 6: Do they have siblings and get to know them? Some
17:50
Speaker 6: people have walls up, so you try. And then for
17:54
Speaker 6: me it's I think it's I don't step in unless
17:58
Speaker 6: they're starting to affect each other in their job situation.
18:02
Speaker 6: When it starts permeating through the boat, that's when I
18:04
Speaker 6: step in. When they're all talking about it, and now
18:07
Speaker 6: if I can pick up on it, you know the
18:09
Speaker 6: guests are going.
18:09
Speaker 1: To pick up.
18:10
Speaker 3: Yeah.
18:11
Speaker 6: As far as they're interpersonal relationships, I don't live.
18:16
Speaker 1: You know, I'm.
18:20
Speaker 2: Curious being married did that change or affect you in
18:24
Speaker 2: terms of how you captained your crew. Did having your
18:28
Speaker 2: own deeply personal relationship impacted all what you thought of
18:33
Speaker 2: things or how you viewed certain relationship issues.
18:36
Speaker 3: Perhaps that were happening on the boat.
18:38
Speaker 6: No, I worked to twelve steps, so I'm sober. And
18:42
Speaker 6: the twelve steps I learned the design for life. Right,
18:45
Speaker 6: I'm telling you that changes lives. And I I can
18:49
Speaker 6: see where people need personal growth, right, So and I
18:52
Speaker 6: need personal growth. Get into a relationship, you learn, right,
18:55
Speaker 6: it's easy to have you know, kumbay a your whole
18:58
Speaker 6: life if you're single. But the you get in a relationship,
19:01
Speaker 6: you start working on yourself and you know that personal
19:05
Speaker 6: growth is and it's all about communication. So they don't
19:08
Speaker 6: have that. We do right because we're in relationships. We
19:11
Speaker 6: learn how to communicate because we want it to work.
19:14
Speaker 6: They're they're just hooking up. You know, I guarantee you
19:19
Speaker 6: Joe isn't thinking about his wife and.
19:24
Speaker 3: Material, don't you know.
19:27
Speaker 6: With Nathan, obviously he loved Gail. That's his woman. That
19:32
Speaker 6: is his wife, like well soon to be hopefully. You know,
19:35
Speaker 6: they had a baby together. You look at you know,
19:37
Speaker 6: look at Maliah. Let's take her like she her career
19:41
Speaker 6: was yachting.
19:42
Speaker 3: Yes, she hooked up and you know, yes, and she
19:45
Speaker 3: was having fun. Yes, now she's a baby she had
19:48
Speaker 3: you know, she's in love.
19:49
Speaker 6: She was in brokerage, you know, so our charter management,
19:52
Speaker 6: our charter brokerage. Yes, so everybody's got their different paths,
19:56
Speaker 6: but I think of below Jack, I think they're just
20:00
Speaker 6: there for that time.
20:01
Speaker 1: Yeah, I got it all right, Lead, did you notice
20:13
Speaker 1: anything that maybe we wouldn't have noticed that, any change
20:17
Speaker 1: in her that you watched actually on the show, as
20:19
Speaker 1: you all's relationship might have been going through whatever it
20:22
Speaker 1: might have been going through.
20:24
Speaker 5: She softened.
20:25
Speaker 4: Oh, I would say, since being married and being with me,
20:29
Speaker 4: and plus her hair and makeup looks really.
20:31
Speaker 5: Good now.
20:34
Speaker 3: Said that I stepped up my game.
20:36
Speaker 4: Yeah, Ramona singer, New York. She goes, she goes, Yeah,
20:39
Speaker 4: your wife really made you say? Oh, she said girlfriend,
20:42
Speaker 4: but she doesn't. No, she's my wife. But so I
20:44
Speaker 4: would say, and the skincare, because I'm a skincare expert
20:48
Speaker 4: and so that side of it, right, Yeah, I've seen that.
20:52
Speaker 3: I actually don't have any more clothes on it. We're
20:56
Speaker 3: gonna go shop later and in a uniform my whole life.
20:59
Speaker 2: That makes sense.
21:00
Speaker 5: Yeah, she does, like, like.
21:01
Speaker 3: I had to go buye this for today. Yeah.
21:05
Speaker 1: Yeah, but we have to tell you every time we
21:07
Speaker 1: see you in street clothes, we say wow, I'm not kidding.
21:11
Speaker 1: You actually made a point. It's great they are she
21:16
Speaker 1: likes she has good shoes. You got a good shoes, Yeah.
21:22
Speaker 5: Good shoes. Oh yeah, they're good.
21:24
Speaker 2: And Leah, I know that you have gone through your
21:27
Speaker 2: own breast cancer scared you care?
21:30
Speaker 4: Yeah, I had three scares three one backtomy. So far,
21:34
Speaker 4: so good and just getting checked every six months.
21:37
Speaker 2: Did that impact just because that's scare and that fear
21:40
Speaker 2: of what if and what happens next? And yeah, all
21:43
Speaker 2: those change just did it bring bring you all closer together?
21:46
Speaker 2: Did what impact did that have on your relationship?
21:48
Speaker 4: I mean, she's such a caretaker, you know, she's a
21:52
Speaker 4: huge caretaker. So she was just like, no matter what,
21:54
Speaker 4: we're going to work through it. You know, she was
21:57
Speaker 4: all for Like if you need a double misectomy, like
22:00
Speaker 4: we're going to do it.
22:00
Speaker 5: We're going to find the best surgeon.
22:03
Speaker 4: And so, I mean, we don't even question when it
22:07
Speaker 4: comes to health.
22:09
Speaker 5: We're just there for each other.
22:10
Speaker 4: We're married and we Yeah, and I wasn't afraid to
22:15
Speaker 4: lose anything, Like if it was going to save my life,
22:19
Speaker 4: I don't care if I get rid of them. Plus
22:21
Speaker 4: you can do a direct and plant now, so the reconstruction's.
22:25
Speaker 2: A amazing what what would you say has been your
22:27
Speaker 2: biggest struggle, your toughest moment as a couple, whether it
22:30
Speaker 2: was when you were dating or when you got married.
22:35
Speaker 5: The builder, the builder. Oh well, we had a builder
22:38
Speaker 5: take all our money. The builder took all our money and.
22:41
Speaker 3: All of our money.
22:42
Speaker 1: What.
22:43
Speaker 3: Yeah, we were robbed so and a lot of other homeowners.
22:47
Speaker 4: We're building a house, we're making payments, and he used
22:51
Speaker 4: the money for his own personal use.
22:54
Speaker 3: So yeah, the builder. That was a big hurdle for us.
22:57
Speaker 5: That was a big hurdle, but we realized that we
22:59
Speaker 5: got through it.
23:00
Speaker 3: In our house was a shell of a house.
23:01
Speaker 6: My sister called and said, I'm not sure what's happening,
23:04
Speaker 6: but nothing's happening on your house at all. I was like,
23:07
Speaker 6: because we were living in Colorado.
23:08
Speaker 1: Yeah, what ultimately happened to that.
23:14
Speaker 3: There's a trial coming in July.
23:17
Speaker 2: Trial but with a pyramid scheme basically, like he was
23:19
Speaker 2: just I just he's.
23:21
Speaker 6: A guy that inherited a business because he married somebody
23:24
Speaker 6: and he ran it into the ground.
23:25
Speaker 3: Oh wow, that's the reality.
23:28
Speaker 4: That's because there was eleven other homeowners that he took
23:30
Speaker 4: the money from.
23:31
Speaker 6: So apparently the company, it was a wonderful establishment that
23:36
Speaker 6: they were a great builder, had a great reputation, and
23:39
Speaker 6: when he took over, that changed.
23:42
Speaker 2: So dealing with massive financial loss, like that's that's stressful, very.
23:47
Speaker 4: But that's what we're both very resilient people. We just
23:52
Speaker 4: get right back up and what do you say? Wake up,
23:54
Speaker 4: dress up, show up, kick ass.
23:55
Speaker 5: That's her thing. And that's really how we live our life.
23:58
Speaker 4: I mean, we don't lay in bed and we're not
23:59
Speaker 4: deproud and we're just like, well, I get up and
24:01
Speaker 4: do my hair and makeup. That's how I get ready
24:03
Speaker 4: for the day. And you know, my b a little
24:06
Speaker 4: bit and she plays with our dog. But we keep going.
24:08
Speaker 4: I mean we don't or what else we win?
24:11
Speaker 3: Got our uh CEO CEO?
24:14
Speaker 5: I mean I became the.
24:15
Speaker 6: Contract versus like you're living in your house. You're not
24:17
Speaker 6: supposed to be living there because we didn't have our CEO.
24:19
Speaker 3: What are they going to do? Arrest me? They're not
24:21
Speaker 3: arresting the builder. They stole her money. They're going to
24:24
Speaker 3: arrest me for a house I paid twice for.
24:27
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, have trees or grass.
24:32
Speaker 3: But he's still walking living crazy.
24:35
Speaker 1: Okay, that's another episode Crazy. Last few things here. You
24:39
Speaker 1: said something earlier you never thought throughout your life, your
24:42
Speaker 1: dating history, that you you never thought about getting married
24:44
Speaker 1: until you met Leah, until you all got together. For
24:47
Speaker 1: people hearing that, what did you listen to right quick?
24:53
Speaker 1: Because that seemed like a huge switch in your life.
24:55
Speaker 1: It's like you weren't even thinking about it and then
24:56
Speaker 1: somebody made you think about it? What is that thing?
24:59
Speaker 1: Because people are wondering is this it? Is this the one?
25:02
Speaker 1: How do I know? What do I feel? What is
25:04
Speaker 1: it that made you finally go, oh yeah, now I
25:06
Speaker 1: want to get married.
25:08
Speaker 6: Your heart You're willing to sacrifice, Like, it's like the sacrifice.
25:12
Speaker 3: So you I've moved. I swear never move out of
25:16
Speaker 3: la I swear never.
25:18
Speaker 5: You made a list, tell them the list.
25:20
Speaker 1: I made a list.
25:21
Speaker 5: Yeah.
25:22
Speaker 3: I love God first.
25:24
Speaker 6: Yeah, so that was the list and music and music
25:28
Speaker 6: and hot and hot.
25:30
Speaker 3: Yeah. It was like, wow, cool because I love music.
25:37
Speaker 5: Yeah.
25:38
Speaker 2: I think it's cool for people to hear though, because
25:40
Speaker 2: a lot of I think a lot of folks do
25:42
Speaker 2: end up just kind of closing themselves off and just
25:45
Speaker 2: saying it's not worth it and it's not going to happen.
25:48
Speaker 2: But just when you think it it won't or it can't,
25:52
Speaker 2: it can did you did you ever you weren't looking
25:55
Speaker 2: for love, but did you lose hope? And did you
25:57
Speaker 2: ever think it would happen like this?
25:59
Speaker 6: I didn't lose hope. I just was oblivious. To be honest,
26:03
Speaker 6: I don't know. I'm Peter Pan, I'm just I don't know.
26:05
Speaker 6: I just continue to find joy. Yeah, but all formed
26:10
Speaker 6: with a joyful heart. I I mean, I was born
26:14
Speaker 6: with a joyful heart. Like I am a child, I
26:18
Speaker 6: am a I have a child spirit.
26:20
Speaker 4: But her friends told me, like you, we can't believe
26:26
Speaker 4: that she found someone that made her settle down like that.
26:28
Speaker 4: We can't believe she finally got married. We can't because
26:31
Speaker 4: they didn't really think that that would happen with you.
26:34
Speaker 4: And they're like wow. I'm like, all right, well you're.
26:36
Speaker 1: Bliss Yeah, well what about you? Twenty year of marriage?
26:40
Speaker 1: What is it that made you go okay, yeah, I
26:43
Speaker 1: want to do this?
26:44
Speaker 5: Her just meeting her.
26:47
Speaker 4: I think when you just honestly, like I think, when
26:50
Speaker 4: you have a connection with someone and you meet that
26:53
Speaker 4: person and it's so powerful and strong, it you feel
26:56
Speaker 4: like you can conquer the world with that person, by
26:58
Speaker 4: your side and it just makes you You make decisions
27:01
Speaker 4: and you don't really care what anyone thinks because you
27:04
Speaker 4: just fell in love, you know, and it just works.
27:08
Speaker 5: So, yeah, she gave me the courage to jump.
27:13
Speaker 1: We've got to collect all these answers. That is a
27:15
Speaker 1: wonderful way to put it. Like people always looking for advice,
27:18
Speaker 1: relationship advice and concrete things on this, this and this.
27:21
Speaker 1: That was just beautifully said. And I agree with you
27:23
Speaker 1: what you're talking. It's how it's hard to explain. You
27:25
Speaker 1: can't explain it until it happens to you and then
27:28
Speaker 1: you go, oh, I know exactly what she's talking about.
27:30
Speaker 5: Yeah, people judge you because they're not happy.
27:33
Speaker 1: Yeah, we figure that out.
27:35
Speaker 5: We know they're so judging because they're measurable and they
27:39
Speaker 5: wish they found.
27:40
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know that.
27:41
Speaker 2: This is my last question. I'm wondering just what you
27:44
Speaker 2: found and what you all have together. And it's palpable.
27:46
Speaker 2: I mean we can see it in your faces and
27:48
Speaker 2: your body language, how you look at each other. It's
27:50
Speaker 2: just it's obvious that this is the real deal. Do
27:54
Speaker 2: you think, having had lived enough life where you found
27:57
Speaker 2: this love later in life, that you have the perspective
28:00
Speaker 2: to actually feel confident where it isn't just this one
28:03
Speaker 2: off or just this passion that could die out, but
28:05
Speaker 2: it's deeper because you've lived enough life to know.
28:09
Speaker 4: Yeah, everyone is like, oh, is that a phase for Leah?
28:13
Speaker 4: You know, because she was like the straight girl in church?
28:16
Speaker 4: And is this just a phase even when you were
28:18
Speaker 4: I think wondering is this a phase because she didn't
28:21
Speaker 4: want to get her heart broken? And I think just
28:24
Speaker 4: time and you know, showing and action and going through
28:29
Speaker 4: the hard times and the ups and downs. I mean,
28:31
Speaker 4: we are very different and yet we compliment each other
28:37
Speaker 4: so well and so and it was just worth every
28:40
Speaker 4: single sacrifice and it was just worth it.
28:44
Speaker 6: And I honestly, I I'm like, why not take the risk?
28:49
Speaker 6: I would rather want to know than not know, you
28:52
Speaker 6: know what I mean? So take the risk the worst
28:55
Speaker 6: case scenarios. You're gonna have a little heartache, maybe a lot.
28:58
Speaker 3: Of heartache, but you'll live. You know, It's worth taking
29:01
Speaker 3: the risk. Yeah, love always is.
29:04
Speaker 2: Yeah, Captain Sandy, is that annoying? Should I just call
29:08
Speaker 2: you Sandy? Sorry?
29:10
Speaker 1: Sandy?
29:11
Speaker 2: Leah, thank you for sharing your love story with us.
29:15
Speaker 2: I do think that it's so inspirational for a lot
29:17
Speaker 2: of people listening who are hoping that they'll find love
29:20
Speaker 2: the second time around, or the third time around, or
29:22
Speaker 2: the fourth or whatever. This podcast at exactly. Thank you
29:28
Speaker 2: so much for being with us and sharing.
29:29
Speaker 5: Thanks for having us.
29:31
Speaker 3: Thank you.
29:31
Speaker 2: Catch the new season of Below Deck Mediterranean on Bravo
29:35
Speaker 2: on Mondays at eight pm and then streaming the next.
29:37
Speaker 1: Day on Peacock And to our listeners, we are here
29:40
Speaker 1: to help. You can send us an email or leave
29:41
Speaker 1: us a voicemail. All the info in the show notes.
29:44
Speaker 1: Follow us on Socials, I Do Part two and iHeart
29:47
Speaker 1: Radio podcast. We're falling in Love is the main objective.
29:51
Speaker 1: We'll see you