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Perimenopause Brain Fog vs. Memory Loss: What's Normal vs. What's Not · Create The Best Me

• 0:00
  Tell me if you've ever had this happen. You are mid sentence.
• 0:03
  You know exactly what you want to say. The word is right there. You can almost see it, almost touch it. And then nothing. Just air. The person you're talking to waits, and you feel your face go hot.
• 0:22
  I want to describe that moment because I know a lot of you know exactly, exactly what I'm talking about. And I want to tell you that experience has a name.
• 0:34
  I call it vocabulary gap. And it is one of the most frightening, most misunderstood symptoms of perimenopause. Because here is the part that scares us the most. When the brain starts doing things we cannot explain, we go straight to dark thoughts. Is this the beginning of dementia? I am losing my mind today. I'm going to answer that question specifically. Not with reassurance, with a real map. By the end of this episode, you will have a checklist of what is completely normal for this stage of life. And you will know exactly what signs actually do warrant a call to your doctor.
• 1:18
  That distinction could change everything. I want to start by separating two things that get tangled together constantly. I think that confusion is what causes so much unnecessary fear. Brain fog is a symptom. It means your brain is running slower than it used to, less precise than it used to. It is a processing issue, like trying to run a new program on an old computer. The information is there, the capacity is there, but something is creating interference. Memory loss, the kind we worry about, is different.
• 1:58
  It is not a slowdown, it is a gap.
• 2:02
  Information that went in does not come back out, ever. Not later that day, not in the shower the next morning, not when someone gives you a hint. It's gone. Here is the most important distinction. I want to remember today. And this is something I wish someone had said to me plainly. Brain fog is a retrieval delay. Concerning. Memory loss is a permanent gap. If you walk into a room and can't remember why, but you retrace your steps to the kitchen, and then it comes back to you, that is a retrieval delay. That is brain fog. That is normal for this stage of life. If someone tells you about an important conversation you had last Tuesday and you have absolutely no memory of it, not even the location, not even a fragment, that is a different category.
• 3:02
  Both matter, but they require completely different responses. And mixing them up is causing a lot of women to panic about things, things that are normal, while potentially not paying attention to things that need a little professional eye. Now let's talk about why the vocabulary gap happens. Because once you understand the biology, the fear shrinks Significantly, and I believe that understanding is part of handling.
• 3:35
  Here is the connection most people skip over entirely.
• 3:39
  Estrogen is not just a reproductive hormone. Your body is loaded with estrogen receptors, particularly the hypocampus, which is your brain's primary memory center, the part responsible for filing and retrieving information. Estrogen acts as a neuroprotectant in that region. So why is this important? Because it helps keep your brain's filing system organized and your retrieval pathways open. But estrogen also has a specific and direct relations with your neurotransmitters, called acetylcholine. Acetylcholine is your memory molecule. It is a chemical messenger your brain uses to form memories and recall existing ones. Estrogen promotes its production.
• 4:29
  When estrogen drops in perimenopause and menopause, acetylcholine levels fall with it. And this is specifically why word finding is a symptom so many women describe. First, verbal fluency, the ability to quickly access and produce the right word, is one of the cognitive functions most sensitive to acetylcholine levels. It is not your intelligence. It is not a sign of decline. It is your brain's chemistry adjusting to a new hormone hormonal environment. Here's what I want you to hear. That filing system is not destroyed. It is temporarily disorganized. And there are specific things you can do to support it, which is exactly what we are going to cover.
• 5:16
  This is the part I want you to save, share, and come back to.
• 5:20
  Because I think every woman in midlife deserves to have information.
• 5:24
  Before I go through this list, if you've been watching this, this, and you've been scared about your memory, I want you to drop a comment right now. How long have you been sitting there with this fear? Because you should know not to have to.
• 5:40
  And by hitting subscribe means you will get this kind of practical information every single week. Okay, now that you know that I am here to support you, let's get back.
• 5:52
  One, you walk into a room and forget why, but it comes back to you when you retrace your steps.
• 6:00
  Two, you lose a word mid sentence and it resurfaces again minutes or hours later.
• 6:07
  The word itself is intact. The pathway is just temporarily rerouted. Three, you read a paragraph and realize you absorbed absolutely nothing. You go back and it makes complete sense the second time. Four, you struggle to hold multiple things in your mind at once.
• 6:31
  The phone conversation while cooking, the meeting while mentally drafting an email. This is working memory, and it is one of the first cognitive functions affected by acetylcholine changes.
• 6:46
  5. Your processing speed slows down.
• 6:49
  You take a beat longer to respond. You feel less quick. You are not less sharp. Your brain is simply recalculating in a new chemistry.
• 7:01
  6. You lose your train of thought mid sentence, but you can reconstruct the sentence when prompted by even a single word. 7. You struggle to remember names, particularly new names, acquaintances, people you do not see regularly.
• 7:20
  Long term names, your children, your close friends, family faces those are typically preserved.
• 7:27
  If you are nodding at several of those, I am giving you permission to breathe right now. That is brain fog. That is perimenopause. That is not dementia. I want to be completely honest with you.
• 7:42
  I am not a doctor. I'm a transformational coach sharing what the research says. And I want to be clear that I am not here to replace your physician. These five signs deserve professional attention. Not panic, but action. 1. You get lost in a familiar place. Not disoriented briefly, but actually unable to find your way in a neighborhood you have driven through for years. 2.
• 8:12
  You forget appointments repeatedly, not occasionally, and you have no memory that the appointment was ever made. 3.
• 8:23
  People who you know will notice personality changes, a shorter fuse than your baseline.
• 8:30
  Withdraw from things you used to love. You do not notice them, but they do. 4.
• 8:38
  Familiar tasks become difficult. Cooking a recipe you have made hundreds of times. Navigating your banking app, managing a calendar system that used to be effortless. 5. You ask the same question multiple times within the same conversation. Not forgetting an answer from last week, forgetting the answer from five minutes ago in the same sitting. Any one of those five consistently. Please make an appointment, not from a place of fear, but from a place of self-advocacy. You are your own best health champion. I want to talk about food, but not in a general way. I want to talk about brain specific nutrition because there is a distinction that matters. There is something called the mind diet, an eating framework developed specifically to support cognitive health and reduce neurological decline.
• 9:40
  And the reason I want to share it is because the specific foods on this list targets acetylcholine production, reduce what is called neuroinflammation inflammation inside the brain and protect the hippocampus. Specifically. Here are the five things I want you to focus on. Fatty fish 2 servings per week minimum. Salmon, sardines, mackerel the omega 3 fatty acids, specifically DHA, make up a significant portion of your brain cells membranes. They literally keep the brain cells structurally sound and communicating efficiently.
• 10:23
  When DHA is low, brain cell walls become less flexible and that affects how quickly signals travel. Berries, especially blueberries and strawberries. The flavonoids in berries reduce neuroinflammation and improve the communication brain cells. Research shows that women who eat berries regularly delay cognitive aging by two and a half years. That is a measurable, meaningful number. Dark leafy greens every day. Spinach, kale, arugula.
• 11:00
  These are rich in folates and vitamin K, both directly tied to slow aging related cognitive decline. One serving per day is linked with a brain 11 years younger than those who eat
• 11:14
  none. Olive oil: Use it as your primary fat. It contains a compound called olidocanthal, which researchers are studying specifically for its ability to clear amyloid proteins from the brain. The same protein associated with Alzheimer's eggs.
• 11:36
  none. Olive oil: And this one is specifically about acetylcholine. Egg yolks are one of the richest sources of choline, the precursor your brain uses to manufacture acetylcholine. Your memory molecules. As your estrogen drops and your acetylcholine production decreases, dietary choline becomes even more important.
• 12:00
  none. Olive oil: This is the specific nutritional gap that is almost never discussed in a menopause conversation.
• 12:09
  none. Olive oil: I want to introduce you to one more concept that changed the way I think about midlife brain health entirely. It is called cognitive reserve.
• 12:20
  none. Olive oil: Think of it like this. Two women go through identical hormone changes in perimenopause. Same estrogen drop, same acetylcholine shift, same biological transition.
• 12:35
  none. Olive oil: But one of them experiences significantly more brain fog than the other. Why?
• 12:42
  none. Olive oil: Researchers believe the answer is cognitive reserve.
• 12:46
  none. Olive oil: The brain's accumulated resistance built up through learning, stimulation and social connection. Over time, the more diverse and challenging your mental activity has been, the more pathways your brain has built. And when one pathway gets disrupted, the brain with greater reserves can reroute through another. So what does this mean? Our brain can quickly adapt. It can build new roads. And midlife is not too late. It is actually one of the most powerful windows for that building, three specific things grow Cognitive
• 13:26
  Reserve: Learning something genuinely new, not more of what you already know. Something that forces your brain to build a new pathway, a new language, a new instrument, a new skill that requires both hands and mind coordination.
• 13:44
  Reserve: Uncomfortable learning is protective learning.
• 13:48
  Reserve: Reading with engagement, not scrolling. Deep reading. Fiction specifically has been shown to build theory of mind which exercises the prefrontal cortex, the same part of the brain that struggles the most with brain fog. Social connection. This one is unrated and critically important.
• 14:10
  Reserve: Chronic social isolation is one of the strongest modified risk factors for cognitive decline, equivalent in some studies to smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Not because the connection is nice, but because neurologically protective, it exercises the brain. That solidarity actively simply cannot. If you have been pulled away from people isolating because you feel foggy, less confident, less sharp, I'm giving you permission to recognize that isolation is making the brain fog worse. Not because you're not doing anything wrong, because that's how biology works. I want to bring this home with something I feel strongly about. There is a layer of the brain that is not hormonal at all. It is stress-driven. And for women our age, those two things are almost always happening at the same time.
• 15:14
  Reserve: When our nervous system is in survival mode, when cortisol is chronically elevated, your brain produces what researchers call neuroinflammation, inflammation inside the brain. And neuroinflammation is not the same as neurodegeneration. It is not damaged, it's disrupted, temporally disrupted. That responds to nervous system regulation.
• 15:43
  Reserve: What that means is this. The brain fog you are experiencing may have two driving operating
• 15:50
  systems: hormonal shifts and the nervous system that has been running on high alert for a long time. Treating only the hormonal piece and ignoring the stress piece will not fully clear the brain fog. Your clarity is not gone, it's just being suppressed. And that is a completely different situation.
• 16:15
  systems: So here's what I want to leave you with. Save the checklist on the seven normal symptoms and the five that weren't a call. Share it with a woman in your life who is scared and does not know the difference. Because that fear, that alone in the dark feeling fear, is the one thing I want to address on this channel.
• 16:42
  systems: Your brain is not failing. It is navigating a transition it has never made before.
• 16:49
  systems: And now you have a map. Tell me in the comments, which of those seven brain fog symptoms did you recognize in yourself?
• 16:57
  systems: And if you want to go even deeper on the nervous system and survival side of this, I have linked the anti-stress morning routine and my cortisol morning reset episode right below in the show notes.
• 17:11
  systems: If you would like to learn more about today's topic, please visit createthebestme.com ep167. Until then, keep dreaming big. Take care of yourself and remember, you are not losing your mind. You are finding a new one.
• 17:30
  systems: Thank you for watching. Catch you next week. Bye for now.