Latest / Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor / What’s the difference between constructive and unhelpful feedback?

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What’s the difference between constructive and unhelpful feedback? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Feedback at work can sting even when it's delivered kindly.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Many people can feel embarrassment or worry when someone points out something they could have done better, and that is a very human reaction.
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  SPEAKER_00: Knowing the difference between constructive and unhelpful feedback makes it easier to decide what to do with it.
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  SPEAKER_00: Constructive feedback is specific, focused on your work or behaviour, and gives you something you can act on.
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  SPEAKER_00: Whereas unhelpful feedback tends to be vague, personal or shared when the other person's feeling frustrated.
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  SPEAKER_00: Now when feedback lands, a few questions can help you figure out what's constructive versus what's unhelpful.
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  SPEAKER_00: So you can ask yourself: is it about something I did?
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  SPEAKER_00: Is it about who I am?
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  SPEAKER_00: Is it specific?
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  SPEAKER_00: As good feedback usually comes with an example so you can see what the person has noticed.
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  SPEAKER_00: Does it point to a way forward?
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  SPEAKER_00: As constructive feedback leaves you clearer about what to try next, while unhelpful feedback tends to leave you feeling smaller and more confused.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: And also try asking what seems to be the purpose.
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  SPEAKER_00: As feedback shared to help you grow usually comes from someone who believes you can improve.
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  SPEAKER_00: Feedback shared just to then carries more judgment than any sort of direction.
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  SPEAKER_00: Now, practical ways to support yourself with this is when feedback feels vague, ask for what you need.
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  SPEAKER_00: You can say for them to provide an example of when they've noticed something or what would they like to see next time.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: As such statements or questions can turn a general comment into something workable.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: You can also write down the useful points and pick one thing to try this week.
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  SPEAKER_00: And if a comment feels personal, you can ask to bring the conversation back to the specific piece of work.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: It also helps to talk it through with a trusted colleague, mentor, or friend and to keep a note of the positive feedback that you do receive.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if criticism at work is frequent, personal, public, or leaves you dreading going into work, then it is worth speaking to your manager, HR, or someone you trust at work.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: You can also speak to your GPU or a therapist who can support you if it's affecting your sleep, mood or confidence, or if you keep replaying comments for days on end.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: Also, it's helpful knowing that many workplaces also offer an employee assistance program, which often include free counselling and wellbeing support.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: Now you can go back to the app's resources on handling criticism and feedback for further support, and if you are thinking about harming yourself on feeling safe, then please seek urgent help by contacting your local emergency number or a crisis helpline.