Latest / Tehillim for the Soul with Dr. Miriam Menaker / The Soul’s Day of Freedom: Letting Go, Returning & Beginning Again with Dr. Miriam Menaker

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The Soul’s Day of Freedom: Letting Go, Returning & Beginning Again with Dr. Miriam Menaker · Tehillim for the Soul with Dr. Miriam Menaker

0:00
Hashem is greater than the wound.
0:02
The Neshamah is greater than the memory, and our future is greater than our past.
0:10
It's very important to start a year clean, and this is the Avodah, this is the service of Yom Kippur.
0:17
Yom Kippur teaches us that we are never permanently trapped inside yesterdays.
0:25
Hashem give us the ability to release, to return, and to begin again Yom Kippur is a day of freedom, is the holiest day of the year when the soul has the potential to transcend the limitation of the body and reach extraordinary levels of closeness to Hashem.
1:01
On this sacred day, we seek to connect with the deepest and purest dimension of the soul.
1:10
It's called Yehida.
1:12
Yehida means unity, there is no more separation between us and Hashem.
1:19
It's the essence of the Neshamah, is the fifth level of the Neshamah, and that dimension is only achievable in the last hours of Yom Kippur, the hours that we call the Nehilah.
1:35
The purpose is not to reject the body.
1:39
The, purpose of Yom Kippur is to elevate the soul, but not to reject the body.
1:46
The body is holy and necessary for the fulfilling of our mission in this world.
1:54
But on Yom Kippur, Hashem give us an extraordinary day to experience what lies beyond the body.
2:06
So for one day, the soul, it leads our life.
2:11
We, start Yom Kippur by a preparation the day before or very early in the morning on the eve of Yom Kippur.
2:20
That is what we call kaparot.
2:23
Kaparot is something very special, is a moment at dawn in the morning, that we take a live chicken, even a fish or money to be given to charity, and receive the following three times.
2:41
We say a berakhah that says this is my return to you.
2:46
This is my, Stemurati.
2:49
This is kaparati.
2:50
Kapara is, that is to prevent anything bad to happen to us.
2:56
Atar negolet means a chicken will go to die for us, will be a substitution for us.
3:04
And ani, and us will go to a good life, a long life, and to shalom, and to peace.
3:13
This is what we read before, Yom Kippur.
3:17
Yom Kippur is a very solemn day.
3:21
And for ladies that they don't go to the mikvah every month, like when a woman in her active life, reproductive active life, we can go to the mikvah this day before Yom Kippur.
3:37
There is a custom before that day we eat a little piece of honey lecha, means a, cake made with honey to sweeten the day What is the purpose of Yom Kippur?
3:52
Is to remove, to conceal everything that happened in the past.
3:59
Is a day with, where we release what has accumulated within us, negativity, unhealthy attachment, grudges, selfishness, destructive habits, and everything else that conceals the divine line within the soul.
4:18
Throughout the year, layers can accumulate, years of negativity.
4:24
Yom Kippur allows us to remove those layers and rediscover what has always existed beneath them.
4:34
Our essence remains pure.
4:37
We, start the liturgy of Yom Kippur we repeat seven time Kol Nidre.
4:43
Kol Nidre actually is to remove and to abolish all the vows that we have, or we made the past year.
4:52
And this come from the time of the Jews when they were in Spain.
4:59
The, Jews at that time,, many of them, in order to save their lives, they converted, at the eyes of the Christian but inside their own home, they continue to be and to practice the laws of Judaism.
5:17
And this is, they were called in a very deterior way, they were called Marranos.
5:24
That is, like pigs.
5:26
Jews, they felt that when Rosh Hashana- What is the purpose of Yom Kippur?
5:32
Yom Kippur is considered a day of freedom when you can release yourself from all the negativity that weigh us down through the year, all the, grudges that we may have, all the feelings of guilt that we may have, all the feeling that, we feel hurt by others.
6:01
So that must be completely released.
6:05
And the reason of the Kol Nidre, that is the first things that we say in Yom Kippur at the beginning, in the eve of Yom Kippur in the synagogue, in Spain.
6:19
They felt guilty that they needed to look like Christian, but inside they continue being Jewish.
6:30
The idea of Kol Nidre from that time of the Inquisition, in Spain.
6:37
So in Yom Kippur, we repeat constantly the 13 attributes of mercy.
6:44
And what we want, we are not simply asking Hashem to erase a list of translation.
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What we are asking him to help us to return.
6:58
And what means to return?
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To return is to reconnect to Hashem.
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Because when we reconnect to Hashem, we are reconnecting to our source of life, our source of connection, our life, our true life that every one of us has.
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So Yom Kippur is a day of freedom.
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You freed yourself.
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For one day, we, step away from the constriction, distractions, and physical demands that occupy so much our lives.
7:36
We empty ourself of what weight us down so that something deeper can emerge.
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We become lighter.
7:47
We gather in our synagogues.
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The whole day, not merely a separate individual, but as one people.
7:56
We one collective soul standing together before Hashem.
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For approximately 25, 26 hours, we fast and detach ourself from physical pleasures and material pursuits.
8:14
Our attention turns inward and upward.
8:19
We immerse ourself in prayer, Teshuvah, and a spiritual dimension of our existence, who we are.
8:28
So then we are really us.
8:31
We remove any mask that we can carry during the year.
8:36
We return to the person our neshamah knows we can become.
8:41
Every one of us, we have a little angel that is inside us, a little Miriam, let's says.
8:50
And that little Miriam is constricted during the most of the time.
8:55
But in Yom Kippur is her, and she emerge from everything.
9:00
Yom Kippur is the culmination of the Aseret Yemei Teshuva.
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We said that there is 10 days of Teshuvah, 10 days of returning and making account of who we are.
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And these 10 days begin in with Rosh Hashanah and ends with a Yom Kippur.
9:20
It also completes the 40-day period that begin with Rosh Chodesh.
9:27
And what is the number 40?
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In order for a baby, to start breathing and, and be alive and start the life of a fetus is at the time of 40 days.
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So that is exactly the same time.
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So we are already being formed as fetus.
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We are there, and we are inside in the womb Yom Kippur carries within it the extraordinary possibility of repair.
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That is the point of Yom Kippur.
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There is two types of, commandments that are do and commandments that are not do.
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Those commandment that we don't have to do, or when we do that are negative commandments, those commandments, they are not repair.
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Even if we do teshuva through the year.
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Only in Yom Kippur we can repair them.
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So what was damaged can be repaired.
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What became distant can come close again.
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What became concealed can be revealed.
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And what appear broken can become to beginning of an even deeper relationship with Hashem So we, in Yom Kippur, we remove from our physicality and we become a spiritual being.
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Every one of us has two sides.
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A material side that is the need of eating, the need of, wanting material wealth.
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And we have another part of us that is that spiritual part that always wants to elevate and is there and questions our life.
11:28
So Yom Kippur possesses a unique spiritual power to cleanse the damage created by our wrongdoings and draw us close to the source of life.
11:42
That's why we repeat many times in the Shacharit, in the morning prayers of the Amidah, and in the Musaf, Ashamti, Bagati, all those, we take part of our hand and we make like a Hit the right side of our heart, and that creates a vibration in the whole body.
12:08
And this is that we repeat constantly is in order to awakening even our more,, sleeping part of ourself.
12:21
To enter this elevated state, the Torah ask us to step away temporarily from the physical world.
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We refrain from eating and drinking, bathing, from pleasure, anointing ourself, wearing leather shoes, marital intimacy, and prohibited work Because they are not apply anymore.
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Those are physical part of, our life.
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So we are not anymore connected with physicality.
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For one sacred day, we live differently.
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We resemble the angels who do not require physical nourishment to fulfill their divine mission.
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But perhaps there is an even deeper message.
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We are not trying to become angels.
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This is interesting.
13:15
Yom Kippur reminds us that we are so much more than our mistakes.
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We are not defined by the moments in which we fall.
13:27
We are defined by our capacity to return, and this is something extraordinary to understand.
13:37
And when everything external is stripped away, we discover something extraordinary.
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This is our connection.
13:47
The soul never stopped belonging to Hashem.
13:51
We always are connected to Hashem, no matter what, no matter even if we do completely sins, we always are part of Hashem.
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So Yom Kippur is a day of forgiveness.
14:08
And as we approach Yom Kippur, we encounter one of the deepest gift Hashem has given, the possibility to.
14:16
In the Yom Kippur liturgy, we say three words for forgiveness, that they are different and separated.
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We say‹‹selaj,››‹‹mojel›› and‹‹kaper››.
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So what-- let's understand means‹‹mehila››.
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‹‹Mehila›› is one of those three Mehilah is, is, means a whole.
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Comes from the whole.
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Whole in Hebrew means a grain of sand.
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And it is also described ordinary like the week days also are called Yemei Khol, the days of the weekdays.
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Sand is make of countless of tiny grains.
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Something that once felt enormous and immovable can gradually break down until it becomes like sand beneath our feet.
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This is extraordinary concept.
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So something that weight on us very heavy can be completely destroyed, completely, be like grain of sand.
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There is another word of forgiveness, selach lanu, we say also in our tefillah.
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And selichah can be understood as another stage in this inner transformation, weakening the power of the hurt.
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Selach is we, is a way to forgive someone if someone hurt us.
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The memory may, still exist, but its emotional force begins to diminish.
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We often imagine that forgiveness is something we give to another, yet forgiveness is also something we give to ourselves.
16:25
When I refuse to release a hurt, I may unknowingly remain connected to the very experience from which I wish to be free.
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But when I weaken its hold over me, I reclaim my inner world.
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So forgiveness, to say selichah, to say forgive us, is that we choose.
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My thought and that I don't dwell anymore in negative thought.
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It's not that I am hurting others.
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I am hurt myself.
17:09
I can choose what I will carry forward, and I am not dependent of negative emotion.
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If I hold crutches, I am attached to them.
17:22
I am being like a, a prisoner to my own thought.
17:29
When I release them, then I am free again.
17:34
And the last word that express forgiveness is kapér.
17:39
That's why we call kaparot, correct?
17:42
Kaparot is also to cover up and is to...
17:48
And actually, this is what we do when after that the shochet kill the, with a knife, very sharp knife,, cut the, the neck of the animal, of the chicken, we cover with sand.
18:05
We take sand that are down in the soil, and we cover this blood.
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Because it is like covering the blood is a substitution When we do that, we are transforming that experience, and instead of that, there is a substitution.
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That's why we said that the chicken will go to to die, and I am going to live.
18:32
So kapér means I am covering, and this is all the reason that, there is the custom in Yom Kippur, before Yom Kippur, to eat a type of a dough, and inside we put in the dough, a piece of chicken or a piece of meat, and we cover it.
18:51
That is the same idea.
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It's a physical representation that we are covering our sins, and Hashem is forgiving us from our sins As not covering in the sense of denying or hiding what happened, but allowing something rather to cover the wound.
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This is the most important part.
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On Yom Kippur, we are ashamed not merely to erase our mistake, but to surround us with with compassion perhaps we are being taught to do the same Eh, with our own side, with our own hurts.
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There are moments when understanding is not enough.
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There are wounds we cannot explain and experiences we cannot undo.
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At those moments, we ask Hashem to help us place something greater over the pain.
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And what is that will heal faith, will be compassion, will be to have a purpose in life and have a divine providence upon us.
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And then comes the beautiful letter Samech.
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When you take the first letters of all those Selichah and, Kapara, Mechila and, and K- and Kaper, we create the first letters, create a letter that is the letter Samech.
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And what is letter Samech?
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Is round and shows the Samech that is circular.
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It has not obvious beginning and no end.
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It surrounds completely.
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It reminds us of the divine reality that surrounds us even when we cannot see it.
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The light of Hashem that exists beyond the limitation of our understanding.
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The, light of Hashem always is there, but with our mistake, with our negative perspective, it's cover is blocked.
20:57
Hashem is greater than the wound.
21:00
The Neshamah is greater than the memory, and our future is greater than our past.
21:07
It's very important to start a year clean, and this is the Avodah, this is the service of Yom Kippur.
21:15
Yom Kippur teaches us that we are never permanently trapped inside yesterdays.
21:22
Hashem give us the ability to release, to return, and to begin again.
21:29
Forgiveness does not mean saying,"I did not hurt." Forgiveness means saying,"It hurt.
21:37
It became part of my story, but I will not allow it to become the author of my story." That is different.
21:47
We place the past into the hands of Hashem, loosen our grip upon what we cannot change,, and create a space for what Hashem is asking us to become Yom Kippur, the other part of Yom Kippur is Teshuvah.
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Teshuvah is returning, and Teshuvah is usually translated as repentance, but its meaning is much deeper.
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The word Teshuvah means return.
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It is the process of repairing, mending, and transforming what has been damaged so that we can now return to our truest selves and ultimately return to Hashem.
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Teshuvah teaches us something extraordinary.
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Our past doesn't not have to dictate our future.
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A mistake can become the very place from which transformation begins.
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So even something that was negative, in reality, i- if we d- didn't have that experience, we will not do Teshuvah.
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So that is the advantage of a a sin.
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A sin is bad, but because of the sin, I can grow higher spiritually So Teshuva has several dimension, each representing a different way of repairing the past.
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The past, there is a teshuvah that is called Teshuvah Aba.
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That means teshuvah of transformation.
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A person encounters the same situation in which they previously stumble.
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The circumstances are similar.
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The temptation is present and the opportunity to repeat the behavior exist.
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But this time the person chooses differently.
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It's very hard to remove, our way of being, our anger of our negativity.
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So we constantly, we will fall back in the same problems.
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But when we are in similar situation and we are tempted to repeat again the same mistake, but this time we are choosing differently.
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So in this time we have to see, we acknowledge what we did, and then when acknowledge we can separate.
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And when we separate we can sweeten our relationship.
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It is not enough to say,"I have change." Sometime life bring us back to a familiar doorway and ask,"Who are you now?" The situation may be the same, but I am no longer the same person.
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The thought that we have to carry in our mind.
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I am not the same person.
24:54
Every day is a new day.
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Every day is a renewal of Ma'aseh Bereishit, of the action of Hashem, of the action of the world where we live.
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When I go to sleep last night, okay, I carry something in my shoulder, but t- today, the next morning, I am anew again, and I can be a new person.
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So there is another teshuvah that is Teshuvah Geder.
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Geder in Hebrew means a boundary.
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So how we can heal is creating boundaries That prevent us not to fall again in the same place, in the same destructive partners,.
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When I understand where I am likely to stumble, I don't keep putting myself in that situation and expecting myself to resist.
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Instead, I create healthy boundaries around what is precious.
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This is a whole healing process that many of us go through.
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There is another type of teshuvah, that is the teshuvah of mishkal.
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Mishkal is balance.
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This form of teshuvah seeks to restore balance it is about redirecting our strength toward what is holy.
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This is the transformation, and this create a balance.
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Instead of putting all my passion, my emotion in this negativity, let's transform that in something holy.
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If I feel myself that I am getting very upset, instead of feeling the upset, I take a book of Tehillim, of Psalms, and I read them.
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So that divert my mind of my negative thought.
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Then there is another last level,, teshuvah of true consequences.
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There is also a dimension that what are the consequences of what I did?
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So the experience, the person experiences the consequence of harmful action.
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Sometimes we do not recognize the seriousness of our choices until we experience what those choices have created.
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Pain itself can become a teacher when it leads us towards greater awareness and responsibility.
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The purpose is not simply suffering.
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The purpose is to awaken.
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Hashem does not desire that we remain trapped in guilt.
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He desire that we return.
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Is not to have guilt, because the guilt is something that will create sickness.
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We want to go over it.
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So beside that, there is three steps of teshuvah.
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And those three step as called harata.
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That means I regret, I look honestly at what happened, and I recognize that my action were not aligned with who I truly want to be.
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Regret is not the same as shame.
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Shame says I am bad.
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Harata says I am capable of something greater than the choice I made Harkat, there is Kabbalah, is acceptance and commitment.
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I accept responsibility for what happened and make a sincere commitment towards the future.
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Teshuvah cannot remain only an emotion.
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Regret must have eventually become a decision.
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I make the decision of change.
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I ask myself, what am I accepting upon myself now?
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What will I do differently?
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Who do I want to become?
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After that, yes, A sivata Chet means leaving the harmful behavior.
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Finally, there must be an action.
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I release the pattern itself.
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I stop feeling the behavior that has been controlling me and begin creating a different path, returning to who we really are.
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Perhaps the deepest beauty of Teshuvah is that Hashem does not ask us to erase our past.
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He asks us to transform it.
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He places where we as-- He places where we struggle can become places of wisdom.
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The places where we fell can teach us how to stand, and the very weaknesses that once distanced us from Hashem can ultimately become pathway that bring us closer to Him.
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Teshuvah, therefore, is not merely about becoming a better person.
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It is about returning to the person our neshamah always know who, knew who we could become.
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We repair on Yom Kippur.
30:41
We create boundaries on Yom Kippur.
30:45
We restore balance in Yom Kippur.
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We choose differently, and slowly we, return ourselves, return to our purpose, and return to Hashem.
30:58
And finally, at the end of the, this long davening on Yom Kippur, we said there is the last le, tefillah, because there is five tefillot in Yom Kippur You have the tefillah of Shacharit, that is the morning prayer.
31:19
Then you have the Musaf, then you have Mincha.
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After Mincha, we have Arvit, and the last one is called Ne'ilah.
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So Ne'ilah is when we finally are asking Hashem,"Open the- your gates." There is a beautiful paradox here.
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Ne'ilah means closing, yet these final moments can feel like the moment when the gates of heaven are most open, and we stand before Hashem with nothing left to hide.
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We cry., Tears come down from our eyes because after a full day of prayer, fasting, confessing, forgiving, and teshuvah, the external layers have begun to fall away.
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And from that deepest place, we ask Hashem,"Open the gates for us.
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Receive our teshuvah.
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Surround us with the compassion.
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Seal us for a year of life, blessing, prosperity, and peace." So that is the end for today.
32:42
It's too long, but I Now I open to discussion, and I would like to hear you.
32:50
I don't know if Emmy would like to ask something or comment something.
32:55
I would love to hear your voice Anita if you can kindly say a few words.
33:04
Thank you.
33:05
It seems to me, to put it in the most simple language that I can understand, is During Yom Kippur, we're given an opportunity.
33:16
We could sit on that opportunity and do nothing, or we can act on the opportunity., And if we act on the opportunity, we are making amends, we are righting what's wrong, and,, we're doing the work that we allowed to perhaps slip throughout the year.
33:42
And here we are given this amazing opportunity to at least get the wheels churning so that we begin the new year on the right path.
33:56
So that's what I have.
33:59
I'm right there with Anita.
34:01
I think it is a tremendous, opportunity to restart what we began in the month of Elul, and just move forward Very good.
34:16
Very good.
34:17
Julie?
34:19
Well, I have some questions, Please that I'd like you to answer first.
34:20
going to the mikvah, can we go on Sunday?
34:25
If that's possible, or can we go anytime during the week?
34:28
yes, it's possible.
34:28
Yes, sure.
34:29
but I thought, But could we go anytime during the week?
34:31
yes, but depend also of the availability of the mistress.
34:35
Exactly.
34:36
I just wa- I question that.
34:38
Okay.
34:39
Could you speak a little bit more about what you said about the little angel inside of us?
34:44
Do we always have a little angel inside of us?
34:47
Or is it just on Yom Kippur we have a little angel inside of us?
34:51
Yes.
34:51
that I will say our inner consciousness.
34:54
Inner consciousness is that little angel.
34:57
Okay.
34:57
Yes.
34:58
Mm-hmm.
34:58
Is sometimes when you do something wrong, you have a, a, a little you that is telling you,"Yeah, you mis- misc- you create a mistake." Okay.
35:11
You did something wrong.
35:12
You are...
35:13
It's as if my own consciousness is telling me,"Yes, you should not say that.
35:18
You should not do that." So that is this little one.
35:23
This is one way to explain, and there is another way to explain.
35:28
We have an image of ourself, of our who we really must be.
35:36
So we, through our life, you make a stain our, this beautiful person that we are inside.
35:46
This is the perfect Miriam that Hashem is expecting me to be.
35:52
Is expecting you to be, and we mess up.
35:57
Okay.
35:57
So that is also that part.
36:00
This, another, a way to understand is we have a side of us that is completely, similar, equivalent to the anima- ani- animal kingdom.
36:13
Right.
36:14
We need to eat.
36:15
We need to dress.
36:17
We want...
36:18
We have an ego.
36:19
We want to have, to conquer.
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We want to be, in the territory.
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This is my territory.
36:28
You cannot touch my territory.
36:30
Things like that.
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So that is an animal,, trait.
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And at the same time, we have a neshamah that is a godly neshamah.
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This neshamah that comes directly from Hashem, that Hashem install in us, that is what flourish and comes up and in Yom Kippur completely free.
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So that part of us is the part that we want to awaken.
36:59
So are we trying to get back to- When before we were born where we had, where God told us what our mission was gonna be in this world, before we came here?
37:13
yes.
37:13
It's that, That, that's the opportunity here is a new opportunity.
37:15
Right.
37:15
The same opportunity that we have when we,, started to learn, when we- started to walk.
37:24
When, that only we were not responsible.
37:27
I- it was the education that we receive from our parents.
37:30
Okay.
37:30
But from the moment of the Bat Mitzvah and Bar Mitzvah, so this is the moment that we become adults.
37:37
Right.
37:37
So that is the moment of that we are responsible.
37:41
So because we want to erase, the negativity and the mistakes of the past year, and we want to start a new page, so we need this moment of Yom Kippur.
37:59
Yes.
37:59
Oh, go ahead.
38:00
I'm sorry.
38:01
yes, go ahead.
38:02
the Teshuvah o- on balance, what was that called?
38:07
Balance is to create an state- no.
38:10
What was the name of it?
38:12
I missed it.
38:12
Ah.
38:13
The Teshuvah.
38:13
I di- I didn't have the Hebrew.
38:15
Oh, you didn't have one.
38:16
Okay.
38:17
That's why I didn't- I didn't have the Hebrew, is,- no, Shave is c- is in Hebrew.
38:22
Shave is something that is equal, a balance Probably is this is the Hebrew name for it Okay.
38:30
What about when you said HaShem doesn't ask...
38:34
At the very end, you said something and I missed it.
38:37
HaShem doesn't ask as...
38:40
what did you say at the end?
38:41
Let me see.
38:42
So HaShem is- That's it.
38:43
Say it again.
38:44
It doesn't, it's not about becoming a better person.
38:47
It is not merely about becoming a better person.
38:51
Of course, it's becoming a better person.
38:54
But you're already that person is what he's saying.
38:56
HaShem is giving us,"Okay, here you are," and it is about returning to the person,, our neshamah always knew we could become.
39:08
We have a...
39:10
this is you.
39:11
When you, express yourself in holiness, this is you.
39:16
This is your person.
39:17
HaShem is not asking that you will be a different Julie.
39:21
No.
39:22
That you will be the Julie that you are already built for being.
39:28
Right.
39:29
So Natalie What a great class.
39:32
I'm just sitting here thinking about, All of the classes but, and it has come to a pinnacle with this class.
39:38
But, because I've always s- thought of Yom Kippur as the day of asking.
39:44
it, negatively.
39:45
it's the day that you're baring your soul, and you're asking for forgiveness.
39:50
And it, and in all of...
39:52
It seems like in, in everything I've been learning since I've come to CBT is that it, about Judaism is that we, it's always positive.
40:00
You, today especially, you took what could be this negative, heavy day of Yom Kippur, which it is.
40:06
It's heavy, and it's serious, and it's in- it's analysis.
40:09
But you took it today to, to show, the, the possibilities.
40:14
That we don't just sit there and shoo all day and beat ourselves up.
40:18
Instead of spending the whole day of Yom Kippur saying what a horrible person I was, and please forgive me, it, it's a time of reflection where w- it's all positive.
40:29
You, this whole class was a, was about, and all of your classes are about the positivity of Judaism, and it's just, I'm just feeling good.
40:37
just, this is what I can do.
40:39
This is, it's al- it's about, you talked about action.
40:43
and yes, I want forgiveness, but because of what I, whatever was negative last year, this is what I'm gonna take upon myself to, to make myself a better person, a stronger person.
40:54
and I guess in some sense we're saying,"Help me to be, to do better and to be better," but rather than,"Please forgive me for being such a creep all year." so thank you for all of the classes, but especially the- Yes this one just really kind of- If you think about- pulls it all together self that you are bad, you never will grow.
41:10
And you need...
41:13
is that the same with a child.
41:15
If we speak to the ch- child,"You are bad.
41:20
You will not never learn anything.
41:23
You are behind," that is terrible for a child.
41:28
And that will be terrible for an adult when they remember their parents, and the parents, they were constantly, hurting him.
41:37
That doesn't help the child to become better.
41:40
Only the child all become very angry and become even worse that he is, because he is very angry, or simply you destroy the, the possibility, and you create an, a, a person that will be bitter the whole life, and in, in a huge trauma And this is, the, the sweetness comes from the Baal Shem Tov.
42:10
The Baal Shem Tov at his time, the Jews were very tortured by group of, m- missionaries that they used to come to the synagogue and ask,"You have to return.
42:26
You don't You are committing a lot of sins.
42:31
You are sinners." and they spoke to the people in a very negative way.
42:37
And the Baal Shem Tov, he says,"No, I have to speak in a sweet way to my people.
42:45
They are my children.
42:47
I have to elevate them and not to put them down." And from there, from the Baal Shem Tov, he came bir- the birth of the Baal Shem Tov is the Hasidut, and that is the idea of Hasidut, and all what I am saying is word from Hasidut Thank you.
43:08
And we, and it, I guess this, we're just as, as you're talking about how we parent and we're the children of Hashem.
43:14
Exactly.
43:15
Exactly.
43:15
Is what I'll- Yes.
43:17
And, Ashira let me know if you can't hear me.
43:20
Yes, I, we can hear you.
43:22
Okay.
43:22
Perfectly.
43:23
this was beautiful.
43:25
I like what you said about regret.
43:27
I think of the things that I've done wrong, or maybe how I've reacted or acted in a certain way, how I've felt.
43:34
And, it makes me think about the cognitive dissonance of it all, of how our actions and our feelings aren't a true reflection of our divine self.
43:45
And so I think it's a great time to really address that cognitive dissonance and really say"This is who I am." I like what you talked about, or someone mentioned about children as well, because we were all children at some point, where we had a very large divine soul.
44:01
And then things happen with life, bad things happen, you fail at things, you react in certain ways, and throughout the year as well.
44:09
And so taking the time to really address, missing the mark, and realizing that's not who you are, not what your purpose is, and finding your way back to your divine soul, I think, is just a great moment, and I really appreciate what you said about that.
44:26
Thank you.
44:27
My pleasure.
44:29
I don't know if Emmy is, still there or she only left her computer on Okay.
44:36
So let's hear from my dear Renee.
44:39
Ah, here it is, Ami.
44:41
Sorry.
44:42
So my hands were full.
44:44
My...
44:44
Just a lot going on.
44:45
let's see.
44:46
You wanted to know my, my thoughts.
44:47
Mm-hmm.
44:47
My first thought is that, it's a great reminder that we're not human beings having a spiritual experience.
44:53
We're spiritual beings having a human experience.
44:57
Mm-hmm.
44:57
And Yom Kippur essentially tries to strip away all the distractions so that we can, essentially do our best to have more of a spiritual experience.
45:06
And I think it's a beautiful thing in our tradition that essentially we get to wipe the slate clean and start again, that we have this period of introspection where we, you know, look at maybe what we did well, what we didn't do so well, where we wanna improve, what we want our life to look like, right?
45:22
And then we concentrate on bringing that into the material world.
45:27
And in order to to, to let the positive in, we have to let go of the negative.
45:31
Exactly.
45:32
And so I just think it's beautiful that we have this structure in our tradition that every year, w- there's a, a, a time period for introspection and then a permission to start again.
45:43
Yes.
45:44
So thank you, Miriam.
45:44
You did a beautiful job.
45:46
I read the, I read your notes beforehand, and that, that helped a lot.
45:48
But, thank you.
45:50
Thank you.
45:51
Thank you.
45:52
Renee?
45:53
I loved when you started out today saying the soul, on Yom Kippu- on Yom Kippur, the soul leads the body.
46:02
I thought that was just summed it all up, and then you went on to elaborate on the different ways.
46:08
So I thought that was perfect.
46:10
The service at The Princess, there's a Sephardic tune about, And it's going through my head, and I can actually hear Claude singing it.
46:21
That I never really understood the words, but I sing along the best I can, about Mehila.
46:28
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
46:32
I don't know if you know it, Miriam, but- Mm-hmm.
46:34
Mm-hmm Yeah, I can.
46:36
the...
46:37
when that, that song, I believe multiple times during the service, and it's, it just has always gone to my heart.
46:46
Now I have an idea what it really means, but, the room, and particularly the men, are just singing it with such fervor.
46:57
And, so thank you for, letting me know what that really means.
47:02
but so that kind of connected me to the service itself.
47:06
that's all I got.
47:07
Thank you.
47:08
Thank you very much.
47:09
And Dr.
47:10
Yoon?
47:10
Yeah.
47:11
I just feel very thankful that how merciful and compassionate Hashem is just to continue to give us an opportunity- to return to ourselves, our own ne- neshamah.
47:23
And, just He doesn't let us get down.
47:27
always gives us opportunity, and it just, how merciful He is, it just reminds me, and I feel very thankful.
47:36
I had a question, actually, as Renee said, about mehila.
47:39
I was wondering if you could explain a little bit more about mehila.
47:43
I think, it was a form of a expression of forgiveness, and it was analogy in Hebrew, we make connection with the words.
47:54
So mehila has inside the le- the three letters that are het, vav, lamed.
48:02
That is whole.
48:03
And whole means a sand.
48:07
So when we, do mehilah, we ask for mehilah, is a, another way of hum-- to be humble because, that make, disintegrate something that is very heavy in something that is light.
48:28
I think that, the way, the cheapest way in construction is to take sand and put sand in a-- that is very heavy.
48:38
Even that create that in, in here in Florida in order to not allow that the, surge of the water in the canal.
48:49
So they,, they put sand there, like sack of sand.
48:55
so means that the sand is something that is heavy but also create a separation.
49:04
And in mehilah, we create a separation.
49:10
We have to transform.
49:12
we have to make Let me go to the word that I have here Mechilah separates us and transforms something very heavy and something that is very light.
49:25
And this is also the work of the work of the s- sixth day of the week.
49:31
The sixth day of the week are time of repairing, are time that we create a reparation of something.
49:40
But in order to do that, we have a Shabbos.
49:43
So the Shabbat is what create the mechilah, create the forgiveness, and this is the function of a, of Yom Kippur, to create that, that, m- mechilah, that, that repair, that forgiveness, forgiveness does not require us to pretend that something painful happened.
50:08
Torah does not ask us to deny reality.
50:12
The event occurred, but and the memory may remain, and the wound was real.
50:19
But I, we can choose whether that memory will continue to govern us and/or we are going to govern that thought.
50:34
We have to be in control of the, our thought.
50:38
And so in mechilah, we are controlling our thought.
50:41
We are controlling, and we are forgiven, giving other person that probably hurts very us, very much, but there is another perspective in front.
50:53
In, in the case that we are, we have grudges, for example, for parents.
51:00
If you have grudges for parents, that their k- kids feels that their parents didn't treat them in the right way, they didn't teach them what they should teach them, they didn't guide them and they led them to a stumble.
51:14
So that, that create a, an, a anger towards the parent.
51:19
And towards a parent, you cannot rise anger, because they are your parents.
51:25
It's like to be angry to God.
51:28
You cannot feel anger t- towards God So those are, those things, there is people that after the Shoah, after what happened in the Second World, they were the, they still are angry.
51:43
They couldn't r-, they couldn't forgive Hashem for what happening.
51:48
They couldn't forgive, seeing all the, horrors that they experience.
51:54
And I understand them.
51:56
I didn't live that experience, thanks God, but they, I can sympathize with them So those are, moments that, of forgiveness that are very important in our lives.
52:11
Because we- I thought we- Yes?
52:13
I'll wait until you finish that thought.
52:15
No,.
52:15
Go ahead.
52:17
I thought we weren't allowed to I thought we were allowed to be angry with God.
52:23
Is that not true?
52:25
No.
52:26
you can ask Hashem.
52:28
You can demand to Hashem, but a negative feeling of anger, no.
52:34
What does that mean you can demand to Hashem?
52:37
What does that look, specifically- an example I can give it to you.
52:40
Okay.
52:40
Abraham Avinu, when, he knew about Sodom and Gomorrah..
52:46
He knew that Hashem w- will destroy the city, because it was a city completely corrupted.
52:54
But he said, uh,"If there are 10 people there that are, they are good people, are you going to destroy the city?" And he looks for those 10 people.
53:06
They didn't exist.
53:07
Then he asked for five.
53:09
Then he asked for one.
53:10
Even one.
53:11
there even one there is not.
53:13
So Abraham demanded from Hashem to forgive the city of Gomorrah.
53:19
Mm-hmm.
53:20
But they didn't receive the merit to be forgiven.
53:24
So that is one thing.
53:26
s- so you can demand Hashem to heal you, to heal a loved one.
53:33
Why this little child has to suffer?
53:37
Right.
53:37
You c- you have to demand that.
53:39
You have to demand, this is not right, Hashem.
53:41
This is a little child.
53:43
They didn't c- commit any sins.
53:45
Uh-huh.
53:46
He is before bar mitzvah.
53:48
He So how, he is going to die?
53:51
I demand you, Hashem, to heal him.
53:55
Okay.
53:56
So that we are allowed to do.
53:58
But, to be a mother that will be angry to Hashem because her child die because of a, circumstances like this, that, no.
54:09
Because- Well, an example, like I have a very dear friend right now.
54:12
Her husband was just diagnosed with a brain tumor, and she's very angry.
54:17
But what you're saying is it's more you turn it into more of a demand Hashem.
54:22
Like, why this is such a, he's such a good person, why would you More of that than an anger energy is what you're saying.
54:31
Yes.
54:31
I don't understand you, Hashem.
54:33
Uh-huh.
54:34
I don't understand your ways this is above my understanding Okay I demand you to heal.
54:43
I demand to make a difference.
54:45
It's like even Moshe Rabbeinu wants us to enter to the- Yeah e- into Israel.
54:50
And Hashem said,"No, you are not allowed to enter." Mm-hmm.
54:55
It's finished for you.
54:56
Even that he was who he was, it's, a, our leader, the only leader that's the highest of the all the leaders of Israel was Moshe.
55:07
Mm-hmm.
55:08
And he was not allowed to do that.
55:10
Right.
55:10
And, but Hashem had his reason.
55:14
Sure.
55:15
And so I, m- I cannot be angry to Hashem, and Moshe could not be angry, too.
55:21
At the end, he- Right accepted his destiny.
55:24
So you can be ch- you can be demanding- but you can't be angry.
55:28
Yeah.
55:29
You can't be stuck in the anger- Exactly is what you're saying.
55:32
Exactly, because- You can't be stuck in the anger anger is a negative- It's very bad emotion.
55:36
It's very- It's a very negative emotion that- destroy.
55:40
It destroys Even instead of helping your...
55:43
I- in the case of this lady, instead of helping her husband to get better, in- instead of that, with this, emotion of angry to Hashem, she should do hesed.
55:57
Means to do good things.
55:59
Good.
55:59
That's good.
56:00
Okay.
56:00
You understand?
56:01
To good- Sure good things, to transform the anger- Absolutely.
56:05
Absolutely in, in positive, in, in a, in positive emotion, in being even more, more gentle to her husband.
56:15
Exactly.
56:15
because when a person is sick, is very demanding, too.
56:19
Sure.
56:20
But didn't you also say that it w- it, it's You said it in one thing in one of the psalms, that we're allowed to challenge Hashem We talked about that, how we are- It could be.
56:35
you are allowed to demand and to challenge if you want to use that word, but al- always- Well, that was the word I would use.
56:42
Uh-huh always, there is limits.
56:46
Sure.
56:47
Al- always there is boundaries because who we are.
56:53
Exactly.
56:53
Exactly.
56:54
Who we are.
56:55
Ash- y- we can, we are also going to die.
56:58
Right.
56:58
Okay?
56:59
Now we are seeing our loved one dying in a very terrible way, but if I, depending of my behavior, I am this is a experience that is a very demanding experience, a experience, very strong experience.
57:19
So in s- I have to be even better than I used to be- in order to receive the mercy of Hashem..
57:29
Beautiful.
57:29
To give a lot of money if they, that person has in order to for That tzedakah was So that is what we say in Yom Kippur, through And, or in Rosh Hashanah, through tefillah, tzedakah.
57:43
Mm-hmm.
57:45
And, uh, t- tefillah, tzedakah, maavirim et hagezerah And teshuva.
57:49
And teshuva That are the three things.
57:51
Right.
57:52
Teshuva, tzedakah, and, a- and tefillah we ma avirim et hagezerah.
57:58
So what is the gezerah?
58:00
That is the gezerah, that her husband is sick.
58:03
So if she has to give tzedakah, she has to do teshuva, she has to pray.
58:10
So if she pray with a lot of devotion, and sincere devotion, she can brings heal to her husband.
58:20
Beautiful.
58:21
Thank you, Miriam.
58:23
That is it.
58:24
Okay, if you I want to finish with this, meditation that is the name of, of Hashem, the combination of Hashem, of the Yud Kei Vav Kei for the months of Tishrei.
58:33
So we use Vav, Hei, Yud, Hei.
58:37
And we put these, uh, vowels that And the, in this first Hei is O, is a point here on top of the, this point of the Hei.
58:47
Va-ho-ia-ha.
58:49
So that is the, permutation of the name of Yud Kei Vav Kei for the months of Tishrei.
58:58
Every month has a different permutation, and this is the permutation for Tishrei.
59:04
That's why I use this one.
59:06
I think that will give us all the energy of the months of Tishrei, and all the energy for all the holidays of Tishrei.
59:17
So we close our eyes, we breathe, and we relax We see ourself at the center of a Magen David.
59:29
Color gold, and we breathe, and we are a column of white light.
59:40
Pure white light.
59:43
This is who we are.
59:45
Pay attention.
59:46
This is the really of us.
59:49
We are a column of white light, covered by a body, a physical body, a body that is also holy.
1:00:00
Is not that is less holy, no.
1:00:03
Is very holy.
1:00:07
And we pay respect to our bodies In front of us, there is another Magen David.
1:00:17
And in this Magen David appear the, one of the permutation of the Hodesh Tishrei, of the months of Tishrei, that is Vav He Yud He And all we light up every letter.
1:00:35
First, the letter Vav, and you see a activated by a flame.
1:00:41
Then the letter He, another flame that activate the letter He.
1:00:49
A letter He flame that activate the Yud.
1:00:53
And finally, another flame that activate the letter He.
1:00:59
All those flames unite in one, and they are attracted to our Magen David.
1:01:09
Leave the Magen David in front of us and are attracted to our Magen David.
1:01:15
They penetrate our skull, enter in our brain, and fill up with his beautiful white light all our brain, and then descend to our heart, and f- finally descend to our liver.
1:01:34
And from the liver to the heart, and then move forward and backward.
1:01:40
Heart, the brain.
1:01:42
Heart, brain, heart, brain, heart, brain, heart, brain, heart, brain.
1:01:46
The light is so big that surrounds us.
1:01:50
And in this moment appear Malach Metatron, Malach Sandalphon, and Moshiach that are the witnesses for our meditation.
1:02:03
And we can approach them and ask them whatever our heart desire.
1:02:11
Because we are close to this immense and terrible day, the day of the kindness.
1:02:22
Of the kindness.
1:02:23
Is called Shabbat Shabbaton, is called Yom Kippur.
1:02:30
And in the holies of the holies, we are going to reach, in Yom Kippur, the place of the Kodesh HaKodashim.
1:02:41
That is what represent Yom Kippur And is a day of forgiveness, a day of teshuva, a day where Hashem is opening his gates of love, his gates of parnasa, his gates of good health.
1:03:02
And he wants surround us by his energy, by his kind and merciful energy.
1:03:11
And here, let me say the 13 attributes: Adonai, Adonai, El Rachum v'Chanu, Erech Apaim v'Rav Chesed v'Emet, Nosei Chesed L'Alafim, Nosei Avon VaPesha V'Hata'a VeNake.
1:03:30
And we, after this Yom Kippur, will enter a new year completely clean.
1:03:37
VeZarakti Mayim Tehorim BeTarten Mikol Tunoteihem.
1:03:43
So Hashem says he is going to throw A lot of water with a lot of force, and that will clean all our negativity, all our sins, all our mistake, and we will, start a new year completely renew from, everything, all the darkness, and only we will receive a light.
1:04:14
And Be'ezrat Hashem, this will be our last Yom Kippur because next has to come Moshiach.
1:04:24
And finally, we are asking that Hashem will bring Moshiach Tzidkeinu bemheirah veyamenu in our days, and we'll have a eternal peace and eternal redemption, and everything will come and will be shalom in our world and the whole world above us, in the whole universe.
1:04:53
And, all the nations will recognize Hashem and will change and transform her tools of war in plowing the soil and c- and growing new soil, new fruits, new everything new.
1:05:16
New flowers, and those flowers we pull out from the soil, and we embellish our planet, and we will see this light of the Ein Sof Baruch Hu.
1:05:33
Amen ve Amen.
1:05:35
Thank you, Hashem.
1:05:36
Thank you, all of you.
1:05:39
Thank you for being here.
1:05:41
Thank you for letting me give this class one day more