Latest / Sober Readings / A Gift That Grows With Time
Transcript
- Scott Hayes: Welcome to Sober Readings. Today is Friday, the twenty-sixth of June. Let's begin today's episode with the Serenity Prayer. God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Today's reading from Daily Reflections, a gift that grows with time. For most normal folks, drinking means conviviality. Companionship and colorful imagination. It means release from care, boredom, and worry. It is joyous intimacy with friends and a feeling that life is good. And that's on page one hundred five one of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. The longer I chased these elusive feelings with alcohol, the more out of reach they were. However, by applying this passage to my sobriety, I found that it described the magnificent new life made available to me by the AA program. It truly does get better one day at a time. The warmth, the love, and the joy so simply expressed in these words grow in breadth and depth each time I read it. Sobriety is a gift that grows with time. Today's reading from 24 Hours, June 26, AA Thought for the Day. We must know the nature of our weakness before we can determine how to deal with it. When we are honest about its presence, we may discover that it is imaginary and can be overcome by a change of thinking. We admit that we are alcoholics and we would be foolish if we refuse to accept our handicap and do something about it. So by honestly facing our weakness, And keeping ever present the knowledge that for us alcoholism is a disease with which we are afflicted, we can take the necessary steps to arrest it. Have I fully accepted my handicap? The meditation for the day. There is a proper time for everything. I must learn not to do things at the wrong time, that is, before I am ready or before conditions are right. It is always a temptation to do something at once. Instead of waiting until the proper time, timing is important. I must learn in the little daily situations of life to delay action until I am sure that I am doing the right thing at the right time. So many lives lack balance and timing. In the momentous decisions and crises of life, they may ask God's guidance, but into the small situations of life they rush alone. And today's prayer for the day. I pray that I may delay action until I feel that I am doing the right thing. I pray that I may not rush in alone. Today's daily meditation from Touchstones God is near me, or rather in me, and yet I may be far from God because I may be far from my own true self. CE Roll. Our relationship with God and our relationship with ourselves are always interwoven. Sometimes we feel disconnected from ourselves or emotionally flat. We may block the flow of communication with our deeper selves by trying to evade a difficult or painful truth. At those times we grope for some kind of contact and may even ask, where is God? God is always with us, but sometimes we are the missing party. In the past, most of us were deeply alienated from ourselves and from our higher power. Our first moments of spiritual awakening may have been when we saw how far we were from our true selves. This honest message from ourselves to ourselves was painful, but it was also a recontact with the truth that made it possible to find God. I need not ask where God is, because God is loving and always near. I only need to ask, where am I? And for today's final reading, I'm gonna read out of the Grapevine from September of 2022. And this writing is titled The Patron Saint of AA. A once bleeding deacon learns to recognize that service to fellowship ought to come from a place of love. I wish I could tell you that after reading the big book and the book Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, I experienced a spiritual awakening and grasped a total understanding of our traditions. I wish I could tell you that as a GSR, a DCM, and an active member of several standing committees, I have never violated the principles set forth in the traditions. But typically alcoholic, I gained most of my knowledge and understanding of From my mistakes and through the mistakes of others. Sadly, I made most of those mistakes after several years of sobriety when I should have known better. As a GSR at my home group, I was extremely adamant about traditions. I tried to dictate moral behavior, told people what literature they could or could not read, and even made violent threats to one man because he was saying bad things about the group. I would run guilt trips on those who refused to get involved with service work while bragging about my own involvement. After about a year of this self imposed misery, I found it necessary to get back to the basics of AA. I discovered that I had forfeited my own serenity. Being a slow learner, I found myself gradually slipping back into my old behavior. I was a DCM at the time. Controversy seemed to dominate my AA life. I was constantly engaged in heavy debate with other trusted servants over issues that were none of my business. I justified this behavior by rationalizing that I was preserving the integrity of the traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. Today I realized that my behavior was just another example of my alcoholic thinking. One day as I was reading the ninth tradition in my twelve and twelve, a message was suddenly revealed to me that I had never noticed before. Even though I had read that particular chapter many times before, I had never understood its true meaning. I had always thought that it merely gave authority for the formation of a service structure. The new message had an entirely different meaning. I suddenly realized that I had been trying to impose organization into the fellowship. In my own way I had been exacting my own brand of punitive action against those who I judged to be less sincere than myself. I had ordained myself as a patron saint of AA. In prayer, I asked for forgiveness from my higher power. At the next area assembly I was selected to chair a meeting with the GSRs and DCMs. With all the humility I could muster. I made amends to all those present and later to those individuals who had felt the sting of my verbal whip. Finally, again in prayer, I turned my will and the care of AA over to God as I understand him. I found the essence of the ninth tradition cleverly concealed on page one hundred seventy four of the twelve and twelve. Bill wrote Great suffering and great love are AA's disciplinarians. We need no others. To me, the ninth tradition epitomizes the spirit of anonymity, clarifies the second tradition, and provides us with an avenue through which our efforts in carrying the message of AA can have continuity, structure, and cohesiveness. It is the principle that necessitated the foundation of the twelve concepts. It requires that I recognize the autonomy of each group, even when I disagree with some of its policies. It will always stand as a personal reminder to me that my service to the fellowship must come from a space of love. And finally, the ninth tradition will always serve as a tourniquet for this once bleeding deacon. And that was written by Charles ⁓ in Columbia, Tennessee, in September of 1990. And that's going to do it for today's readings. I just want to comment on today's meditation for the day from the 24 hours book. Have you ever been at a meeting and the topic comes up of something that you're dealing with in life currently? It seems to happen to me all the time. And that's the case with today's meditation for the day from twenty four hours. It's really talking about having patience, making good decisions, not rushing things. ⁓ timing is important. ⁓ making sure I'm doing the right thing at the right time. And for me, this couldn't couldn't come at a better time. It's just something that I really needed to hear today. It reminds me that decisions made during times when emotions are high are not a good idea. That taking a pause, a breath, and maybe coming back to it later may be the right thing to do. Prayer and meditation are always the answers to many of my problems that I want answers to right now. And as we say in my morning meeting, give it to God. And that's exactly what it says in the prayer for the day from the twenty-four hours. I pray that I may delay action until I feel that I am doing the right thing. I pray that I may not rush in alone. And that last word alone is very important. One of the greatest things about this program is that I've realized I don't have to do anything alone. And for that I am grateful. I hope you enjoyed today's episode of Sober Readings. If you did, do me a huge favor, please, and hit that like button and subscribe so you don't miss the next episode. And also, if you'd like to be a guest reader on the show, I'd love to have you. Send me an email to sobereadingswithscot at gmail.com. And if you'd like to drop a dollar in today's virtual donation basket, just go to my website, sobereadings.com, and click the donate button. So again, thank you so much for listening. Stay sober, keep reading, and I'll see you in the next episode. Until then, take care of yourselves and each other, and remember, just for today, don't drink, go to a meeting, and keep coming back. Have a great day, and as my friend Larry says, best day ever.