Latest / INSPIRE STORY / Episode 18_ Reflecting on Lent and Easter

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Episode 18_ Reflecting on Lent and Easter · INSPIRE STORY

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome back to the Spire podcast. So today
• 0:04
  is Easter, Monday, day after Easter. You will not be
• 0:07
  listening to this day after Easter, so we'll be talking
• 0:10
  a lot about Easter, stuffy, and you're gonna be.
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: Like Easter was like so last week.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: But that's fine because Easter is a long time.
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: Would technically be this week.
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  Speaker 1: It is this week fifty days, that's true. The Easter
• 0:23
  season is fifty days. The Easter like feast day is
• 0:26
  eight days Easter octave, it's like eight days of Easter.
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: I just learned all about that yesterday. I learned about today.
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  Speaker 2: I got it's so cool.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: But yeah, so we'll be talking a bit about Easter, Hower,
• 0:41
  lint wind and all of that. So I actually have
• 0:45
  an introductory question to you guys. Was lint a success
• 0:55
  for me?
• 0:56
  Speaker 4: It was yes, because I went into it with the
• 0:59
  intention of I think my focuses for the last few
• 1:05
  years has been not to look at lent is like Okay,
• 1:10
  what do I have to give up and just checking
• 1:12
  a box, but realizing that it's meant to I'm meant
• 1:16
  to learn something and.
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: Grow in something, grow closer to Jesus.
• 1:21
  Speaker 4: And so this Lent was a big learning experience for
• 1:26
  learning to let go of the way that I saw
• 1:30
  things and I feel about things, and to trust Jesus's
• 1:35
  word and let that be the determiner of my reality.
• 1:41
  And so it's sort of been like a dying of
• 1:43
  myself within a new life in a sense, in a
• 1:47
  real way, because the whole way I see the world
• 1:49
  has completely changed from the start of lent to yesterday,
• 1:54
  especially yesterday, So it's been pretty fundamentally life changing, and
• 2:02
  more so than any other period of my entire life.
• 2:06
  So I would say it was a success. If the
• 2:08
  goal of this is to grow closer to Jesus, then yes,
• 2:11
  I feel I don't feel I am closer to Jesus
• 2:16
  in many real ways.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: That's really cool.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna say yes it was a success, because if
• 2:25
  I don't say yes, then I'm going to just beat
• 2:27
  myself up over the ways that I didn't do as
• 2:30
  well as I wanted to. But I think the biggest
• 2:36
  way that it was a success for me is that I,
• 2:42
  in a lot of ways was kind of forced to
• 2:48
  look a lot of my imperfections in the face and
• 2:52
  be like, I'm to come face to face with my
• 2:55
  imperfections in a lot of ways. And I think that,
• 3:02
  even though I'm not necessarily going to say that, you know,
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  my life is completely changed from ash Wednesday, I think
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  that it was a good kind of stepping stone to
• 3:17
  get there because it kind of helped me to see
• 3:20
  a lot of things. Part of it was definitely like
• 3:24
  doing Exodus and giving up social media and trying not
• 3:27
  to drink as much caffeine or whatever, like those kind
• 3:30
  of things.
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: I thought he was going to go with alcohol.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, alcohol, Yeah, that was the weirdest thing about Exodus.
• 3:38
  As we were talking about that earlier is there. This's
• 3:42
  gonna sound so bad, but there were some times where
• 3:45
  it was like, man, I really just want to drink
• 3:48
  alcohol right now. And it's not because like you have
• 3:51
  a dependency on alcohol. It's just because you don't normally
• 3:54
  drink it anyway. But then all of a sudden, you're
• 3:56
  going to like family parties and stuff and they have alcohol.
• 3:59
  They're like, here, have a drink, and it's like the
• 4:00
  one time you're ever gonna drink.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: But you're like, I can't, and I feel really bad,
• 4:04
  you know, telling father, no I can't. I'll have water,
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  and he's like, but I have this like fancy wine,
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  and like I said, and my father, I mean like
• 4:10
  priest father, not my dad, my dad, just like you.
• 4:17
  Speaker 3: But yeah, so I think there were a lot of
• 4:19
  ways where I was able to see kind of my
• 4:24
  dependencies on certain things, whether that was caffeine or social
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  media or whatever it was, and I was able to
• 4:32
  start to kind of break those dependencies a little bit
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  so that I'm at least moving closer to being able
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  to just because when we talked about like what is
• 4:44
  light and everything, we were talking about being able to
• 4:46
  just trust that your desires for whatever those things are
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  giving you will be fulfilled outside of those things. So
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  I think that it definitely was. It was very eye
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  opening in a lot of ways. And it was a
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  good kind of like get myself moving in the right
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  direction because I already felt like before Lent, I think
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  I kind of talked about this where I felt like
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  I was already kind of moving in that direction and
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  this was just another push where it's just like I
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  know I need to get better in these areas and
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  it's just more motivation for me to do that. So
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  not necessarily super life changing, because it was already it's
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  just a continuation of what I was already trying to do.
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  Speaker 1: I guess, So did you fall in asleep in class
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  a lot because you stopped drinking caffeine or is it
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  like there.
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  Speaker 3: I wanted to it. That was one of the big ones.
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  Was I was so tired all of what, like I
• 5:45
  have never There were some days where I would tell
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  my mom, I was like, right now, I'm more tired
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  than I think I've ever been in my entire life
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  because I'm not doing caffeine. Yeah, just like I went
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  from having an energy drink every single day without fail
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  to maybe out have one a week, like on a
• 6:02
  Sunday or something, and I would wake up at you know,
• 6:06
  seven on a Tuesday morning and not even like have
• 6:10
  the energy to get out of bed. And I'm just
• 6:12
  I can't find the motivation at all because I had
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  been so dependent on it that I literally couldn't get
• 6:17
  myself out of bed. Did that change it all throughout
• 6:21
  the course of the time. It definitely got better over time.
• 6:24
  I think I'm probably still not one like I have
• 6:29
  that it's the first one, second one, but it's only
• 6:35
  been two days. Well, I have one on Easter because
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  we were at a family party and I was tired and
• 6:41
  I wanted to be present and whatever. I have one
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  today because I was at school all day. I'm here,
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  I'm good play volleyball. But I'm not planning on drinking
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  one every day. I'm going to keep it at like
• 6:51
  one a week if I have a busy day or something.
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  But I definitely have noticed myself needing it less as
• 7:00
  time's going on, which is a really good thing because
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  it doesn't make my body feel great and it costs
• 7:06
  a lot of money too.
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  Speaker 2: Oh, I don't want to think about that much.
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  Speaker 3: So do you feel better on caffeine or worse? Like
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  if I drink caffeine, I don't necessarily feel better. I
• 7:18
  feel more energized. It's just like it gives you, like
• 7:20
  the boosts of energy. But it's not like I don't
• 7:23
  drink it because it makes me feel good. I just
• 7:27
  I would always drink it because I was so busy
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  with school and work and everything that I just felt
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  like I wanted to have energy and more energy than
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  I had. But another exist thing was getting eight hours
• 7:40
  of sleep, which I was not doing. And I started
• 7:45
  to do that, and that, combined with not drinking as
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  much caffeine, helped me to have a lot more just
• 7:51
  natural energy, I guess, and so I didn't need it
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  as much anyway.
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  Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, contacting with sleep, that's where you actually
• 7:59
  get your energy, which I don't understand sleep, but we
• 8:01
  can get into that some at the time, whole like
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  two hour long conversation.
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  Speaker 2: What is sleep?
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  Speaker 1: I don't know then, But no, the reason I asked
• 8:09
  why Lynch was a success was I was wanting to
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  get like you guys take on like the intuition of
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  what you think of is like what is LINT for?
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  And it's like, now that I went through Lynt, did
• 8:20
  I succeed in what Lynch was for? And I think
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  you guys did fairly good in that because a lot
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  of people's.
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  Speaker 2: Like it was a complete and other failure.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: I said I would do this thing and that thing,
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  and I didn't. Like I remember me going into Lynt.
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  I was doing all the Exodus stuff and so I'm like, well,
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  I don't want to add too much stuff on. So
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  I'm like, I'll do a daily journal thing tired and aspire.
• 8:40
  We can get back into that. And then I was like, oh,
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  and you know, Lynt's all about time of penance and
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  three things you do for Penance is prayer, fasting, and
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  alms giving. I was like, I should do some alms
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  giving stuff. It's like service opportunities. I did not do
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  any of those, and so I'm like, it's this sort
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  of thing that's like it wasn't a regular daily thing
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  I could do or something set up. It's something I'm like,
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  take those opportunities when you can, and like reach out
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  for them when you can. And I didn't do that,
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  And so in that way, mine could be considered a failure.
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  But as you were saying, it's like the whole point
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  it isn't just like check the box the thing I
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  did this, I did that. And so it's like, while
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  I would have liked to have been a bit more
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  generous or gracious with my time or this or that,
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  I have noticed like things changing throughout lent and it
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  may or may not also just vibe with the normal
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  fluctuations of my life. You know, sometimes I'm like this,
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  sometimes I'm like that, And if you're not watching the video,
• 9:39
  that made no sense to you.
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  Speaker 3: But like just sometimes he's up, sometimes he's down.
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  Speaker 2: Sometimes I'm in sad out.
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  Speaker 1: But yeah, so like, particularly leading up to Holy Week,
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  I was like I really want to just like I kept,
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  you know, in my prayers being like I want to
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  to have this be something special. It's like I want
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  to actually be able to focus and direct my thoughts
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  towards you, this this tridem as opposed to some other
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  times I'm like, oh, I'm just in school and it's
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  like okay, let me read this book or watch this
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  show or this or that, and it's.
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  Speaker 2: Like, oh wait, good Friday is over.
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  Speaker 1: Oh well, and it's like but to actually like into
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  the the sacredness of the tradem and then the holiness
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  of Easter. And so that was really cool because like
• 10:30
  it was a good Friday for the Good Friday service
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  with someone just really cool, you know, just the behold
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  the Word of the Cross. There was a packed church
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  and then there was only one crucifix you were doing
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  for the the veneration of the Cross, and so it
• 10:46
  took like forty minutes. But it is great to see
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  all the different people's Like sometimes there are kids like
• 10:52
  would dance around the cross and then the parents like
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  get out of there. But like I feel like this
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  trideum I ended a bit more fully into into it.
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  And then the Easter vigil is beautiful. It is hard
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  to keep energy during the we only did four five
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  readings and then the gospel.
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  Speaker 3: Where'd you go?
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  Speaker 1: Same theater my family's parish, and so it was beautiful.
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  There were nine baptisms and like a lot of confirmations.
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  Speaker 3: He said that there was twenty people.
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  Speaker 1: It came yeah, twenty people through the RCI, so not
• 11:32
  so twenty people total.
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  Speaker 2: So it was like nine.
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  Speaker 1: Baptisms and then eleven non baptismal confirmations. Ok, there was
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  like two full families that did baptisms, like all the
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  little kids. It was so it was so cool to
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  see and a bunch of the joined people's face and
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  also Father Prissell is just so excited about that. He
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  was like pouring the you know, the water over people's
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  heads for the baptism and he was just like grinnings,
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  like I baptized the in the name of the Father
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  and he's just bouncing around. It was so fun and
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  so yeah, so what was Lint's success? Like, yeah, because
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  we're we're preparing ourselves for Easter and Easter Kane, and
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  so even though we did not do everything, we may
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  have once to unless you did, I know, Fulton seems
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  like he did a lot of cool stuff.
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  Speaker 4: It good stuff happened to me.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, the purpose of LINT isn't just to check off
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  the boxes, as he was saying, And so I think
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  it was a really interesting question because I could have
• 12:32
  been like, did you do all your things? How were
• 12:34
  your observances? In which case that's depressing.
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: It's like, well, yeah, I'm pretty sure it was.
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  Speaker 4: As I was talking in the very beginning about how
• 12:43
  LINT is not a self help program, but that's kind
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  of like if if you're coming at it from a
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  secular perspective where you don't believe Jesus is actually real
• 12:51
  and actually loves you, then it is very easily confused
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  with a self help program. And I think actually a
• 13:00
  pitfall that probably a lot of Catholics fall in is
• 13:04
  not realizing that this is about a relationship. And so
• 13:07
  it's not like if I'm in a marriage with someone
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  because ultimately meant to be in a marriage with God.
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  If I'm in a marriage with someone and they say
• 13:16
  that they love me and they're trying to show me
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  that they love me all the time, and then I
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  have like this stuff that I do that sort of
• 13:24
  takes away from my ability to like see how much
• 13:27
  they love me, then in restraining myself from going down
• 13:31
  those pathways, I'm more open to this love in this marriage.
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  Speaker 3: And so that's like ultimately what lent is, you know.
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: And I think that's been something I've tried to really
• 13:41
  focus on without well, i mean fundamentally like only focusing
• 13:48
  on that because that's the point. So it's like there's
• 13:51
  fast thing you're supposed to do in OLMS or not.
• 13:54
  What do they call it mortification or whatever? Okay, I've
• 13:58
  always felt like that has a bad rap. I don't
• 14:00
  really understand how that plays into. Like I never looked
• 14:05
  at that, It never felt like I was opening up
• 14:07
  to love by denying myself of things because I felt
• 14:12
  like I was just denying myself, which was painful.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was No, that was just but yeah, the
• 14:21
  mortifications like sometimes it can just feel like I'm just
• 14:24
  giving stuff up for the sake of giving it up,
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  and it's like this is hurts and it's stupid and final.
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: I'll do it.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: But like with some of the things that I've you know,
• 14:35
  given up in a mortification way, sometimes I'm like it
• 14:40
  just makes me think whenever I think about it, like
• 14:42
  if I'm taking cold showers, like it's.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: A little too cold for my liking.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: I don't really like this, and it's like, well, then
• 14:47
  why am I doing this? And then I think, oh,
• 14:51
  because Jesus. And it's like I don't know what this
• 14:55
  does and how this helps me. But like in that
• 14:57
  moment where I'm like I want warm, so I'm like, well,
• 14:59
  I'm not doing this because I want to grow closer
• 15:01
  to Jesus. And just in some simple way, it's like, well,
• 15:04
  now I'm thinking about Jesus and how I want to
• 15:06
  grow closer to him. And that's one way I think
• 15:09
  mortifications are are useful, and that because they hurt, they
• 15:15
  make us think about it and make us be like
• 15:17
  why are we doing this? And then the purpose of
• 15:20
  it all is Jesus in some way.
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: But if you're going to give something up, why would you, Well,
• 15:31
  I guess that makes sense.
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: It's difficult. It also depends on well.
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: If you're gonna get because I guess I'm thinking, no, yeah,
• 15:39
  I would not want to. It's good to give things
• 15:41
  up and to let things go, but then it's good.
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: To have them back, yes afterwards.
• 15:47
  Speaker 4: Yes, So I'm trying to understand, like, let's say I
• 15:53
  give up chocolate, chocolate, but then I'm just gonna have
• 15:57
  chocolate again. So my lenk could teypically be a success
• 16:03
  and I didn't eat chocolate, but then if I am
• 16:06
  not actually more in love with Jesus by the end
• 16:10
  of it, then it wasn't even worth it for me
• 16:12
  to do.
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: I think that's like when we were first talking about it,
• 16:15
  the first week of Lent or before Lend or whatever
• 16:18
  that was. That was kind of the whole thing that
• 16:21
  because with little kids, for instance, they might not understand,
• 16:25
  like my eight year old sister, she might not really
• 16:27
  understand that you give something up or you do something,
• 16:32
  you add something maybe and it's supposed to help draw
• 16:37
  you closer to Christ. But it's still good for them
• 16:42
  to understand the concept of like self denial kind of.
• 16:45
  But as you get older, that's why, like it's so cliche.
• 16:49
  But when everybody says, like, don't give up chocolate for lunch,
• 16:51
  it's because if you're an adult and you're like, I'm
• 16:54
  just not going to eat chocolate, and it's like you're
• 16:56
  just doing that because like that's.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: Like fairly easy for a lot of adults.
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and so the whole thing I think we were
• 17:04
  talking about even before LENT was just if you're going
• 17:07
  to give something up, then you should pick something specific
• 17:13
  to you that you know is potentially distracting you or
• 17:18
  pulling you in the opposite direction. Or maybe you have
• 17:20
  like a disordered relationship with whatever the thing is. Maybe
• 17:26
  that thing is chocolate. Maybe you eat like fifteen every
• 17:31
  day and.
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: Is that too much?
• 17:34
  Speaker 3: We might need to talk after this, Like the disorder.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: What you're saying with the disordered affection, I think is
• 17:43
  what you were getting in. It's like if you give
• 17:45
  up chocolate and then just eat chocolate and nothing's changed,
• 17:48
  then it's like, what was the point of it? And
• 17:50
  it's like yeah, because if you have a disordered appreciation
• 17:54
  of chocolate and you give up chocolate, it's like, well,
• 17:56
  no chocolate, and then you retain that disordered affection throughout
• 17:59
  LNT even though you're not eating it, and you go
• 18:01
  back and you're like, well nothing's changed, then yeah, it
• 18:05
  didn't really do anything. But if at the end of it,
• 18:07
  you like, I now appreciate chocolate, like I do enjoy
• 18:10
  eating it, and I do enjoy what it can give
• 18:14
  me in that, but I know I don't need it,
• 18:17
  and it's like it almost writes the disorder affection you
• 18:22
  might have for sweets, so instead of just craving it
• 18:24
  and eating it, it's like I want this.
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: That was the Other thing is if you give something
• 18:30
  up for a time, you're able to better appreciate it
• 18:34
  when you have it back. So like if you and
• 18:36
  you might not even this might be an instance where
• 18:38
  just giving up chocolate that shouldn't be all you do.
• 18:41
  But if you want to do that, maybe this is
• 18:42
  a good thing. Is just you give up chocolate and
• 18:44
  then you go forty however many days of this because
• 18:48
  it's not technically forty like forty, you go, however, many
• 18:51
  days without eating it, and then you taste it again,
• 18:55
  and maybe you don't even want it anymore. Because I've
• 18:58
  had that happen with sugar stuff a lot of times,
• 19:02
  where I don't eat it for an extended period and
• 19:05
  I try it again, it's like I don't even want
• 19:06
  to eat that because it's too sweet. But maybe you
• 19:09
  take a bite of it and you're like able to
• 19:13
  actually appreciate it. Similar to the caffeine that I had today,
• 19:18
  I actually feel more energized as opposted before. It was
• 19:23
  just like getting me to my base level because I
• 19:25
  was so my I had such a disordered relationship with
• 19:29
  caffeine where it was like I was just dependent on it,
• 19:31
  and every single day I needed at least one energy
• 19:34
  drink just to get me to my base operating level.
• 19:38
  And so after having exponentially less, if I have an
• 19:45
  energy drink today, I actually feel the effects of it
• 19:47
  and I'm able to actually appreciate the energy that it
• 19:49
  is giving me. As opposed before it was just like
• 19:54
  I needed to have it just because I needed to
• 19:55
  have it, and it was like I wanted to just
• 19:57
  be able to function. But that's not good. There's nothing
• 20:00
  really I mean, maybe I'm just missing something, but I
• 20:04
  feel like there is there really anything where you should
• 20:08
  be that dependent on it to any extent.
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: Water, food's yeah, shelter, but yeah, Like in a similar vein,
• 20:17
  It's like part of exodus was giving up watching stuff,
• 20:20
  and some I was like, no YouTube unless it was
• 20:22
  like directly applicable towards my school. Like I did not
• 20:26
  watch YouTube except on Sundays, and sometimes I was like, well,
• 20:29
  I can watch stuff, so I gotta watch this, this
• 20:31
  and that, and it was just like, oh, I got
• 20:32
  to get my fill before I can't have it, and
• 20:34
  so like the Sundays is like, well that didn't really
• 20:37
  work out. But but now I'm like, like today I
• 20:41
  got back from class, I'm like I haven't had the
• 20:43
  two hours of grading I need to do, but you
• 20:45
  know what, I'm gonna take fifteen minutes, set a timer,
• 20:48
  and I'm gonna watch a video and I'm like I'll
• 20:52
  limit myself in that way, and then it's just like
• 20:54
  a nice relaxant before I can go take my do
• 20:58
  my grading. And then that was nice because like, well
• 21:01
  I didn't sit and continue watching it for the next
• 21:04
  forty minutes and then another two hours and then until
• 21:07
  it was morning, but like I use that and it's
• 21:10
  like okay, So now I can appreciate, like I do
• 21:12
  appreciate watching like cool stuff on YouTube. And there were
• 21:16
  times throughout Lent and Exodus where I was like I
• 21:19
  just kind of want to like watch this, or someone
• 21:22
  mentioned a cool videos like oh that sounds so cool.
• 21:25
  I can't watch that until Sunday, or it's like I
• 21:28
  want to watch that to share that with you, and
• 21:29
  it's like I can appreciate that now, or as as
• 21:33
  we were talking about earlier, alcohol, like I never really
• 21:36
  drink alcohol.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: It's like I don't really care for it.
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: We should have a glass of wine.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: We should I'll buy some wine.
• 21:44
  Speaker 4: But like I was done with Exodus, Yeah, but.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: Like I don't drink alcohol normally. It's like I don't
• 21:54
  really care for it too much. But then there were
• 21:56
  enough times in Exodus where's like there was a group
• 21:58
  going out to the pub and it's like, hey, when
• 22:01
  it comes, like, oh, I kind of want to come
• 22:05
  and like just hang out with you guys and have
• 22:07
  a drink. It's like that had never really been a
• 22:10
  thing before. I was like, I don't that sounds dumb,
• 22:13
  Like why would I go to a bar and spend
• 22:14
  a lot of money on alcohol? But it's like to
• 22:18
  just go have a drink and hang out with people.
• 22:20
  It's like that I can appreciate that now, and not
• 22:24
  being able to do it help me appreciate that more.
• 22:28
  And so there's there's mortifications like that that I think
• 22:32
  just helps you better appreciate the purposes of things.
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: So when you guys do exit as ninety, it doesn't
• 22:38
  feel like a burden. Oh it does sometimes, I'm not
• 22:41
  gonna lie.
• 22:41
  Speaker 4: Does it make it feel like like your relationship with God?
• 22:46
  Speaker 3: Is It is a conditional one almost where it's like
• 22:50
  I gotta I gotta measure up, I gotta.
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: Ah tornado warning?
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: Is it hail?
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: No tornado?
• 22:59
  Speaker 3: There's no siren. Yeah, well.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: We're fine, We're good.
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: Go up higher, go sit on the roof. I think
• 23:20
  that for me, Oh my gosh, bro.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: It's a warning, not a watch. Wait, warning is worse.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: I never remember because tornado watch makes him think, oh, watch.
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: For the tornado. It's right there. It's like, no warning
• 23:36
  is worse. Warning there's a tornado coming.
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: There will be a siren.
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: Though.
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's a thing that it just means that
• 23:43
  there's some clouds that can do stuff.
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: Was exodus a burden?
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: So I don't know. It depends because I think there
• 23:55
  were definitely times where I I would feel it more
• 23:59
  and I would be like, I want to eat sweets
• 24:01
  or I'm going out, I want to have a drink,
• 24:03
  or I want to have caffeine, or I want to
• 24:05
  watch something or play a game or go on Instagram whatever,
• 24:09
  and let you do all these things and you can't
• 24:13
  do it, and you're like, oh my gosh, I can't
• 24:15
  do that thing. That's really annoying. But I I don't
• 24:19
  think it ever made me feel like my relationship with
• 24:26
  God was conditional, because the way I think of it
• 24:29
  is if you think of it like a human relationship,
• 24:35
  even in the most intimate, most loving relationships, like you
• 24:41
  have standards and you have boundaries, and you have all
• 24:44
  that stuff, and it's not like there are rules to
• 24:47
  loving somebody. But at the same time, there has to
• 24:52
  be an understanding of your relationship and there has to
• 24:56
  be a degree of respect for the relationship and your
• 25:00
  position in the relationship. So that was another thing I
• 25:05
  wanted to get into, was your position in the relationship,
• 25:07
  because your relationship, if you're married, your relationship with your
• 25:09
  wife is different than if you're a kid, and your
• 25:12
  relationship with like your dad, Like there's different kinds of
• 25:16
  loving relationships. And sometimes your dad will ask you to
• 25:28
  do things you don't want to do, not because that's
• 25:31
  a condition for his love, but because he understands that
• 25:34
  your desire for you'll have a basement here. He understands
• 25:40
  that your desire for that thing isn't necessarily ordered properly.
• 25:43
  So if you if your dad says you can't have
• 25:45
  a cookie after dinner, it's because like if you could
• 25:49
  have a cookie whenever you wanted to. You would just
• 25:50
  eat cookies all day long. And he knows you shouldn't
• 25:52
  do that, and that doesn't mean him telling you that
• 25:54
  doesn't mean he loves you any less, and him asking
• 25:58
  you to not do that thing is actually be because
• 26:00
  he loves you more. So even though it's annoying, I
• 26:04
  guess for me, it felt like there's a lot of
• 26:08
  things that I do or eat or drink or whatever
• 26:15
  where they're not bad things, but maybe you do it
• 26:18
  too much, and too much of anything is a bad thing.
• 26:22
  Well not anything, but you know what I mean. So
• 26:26
  I don't know. I guess I never I never thought
• 26:28
  of it like that. That wasn't really my experience with it.
• 26:32
  And yeah, it was annoying a lot because but that's
• 26:35
  only because it forces you to look at your own
• 26:39
  kind of insufficiencies and like whenever you have to look
• 26:42
  at your flaws, like that's a painful thing to do
• 26:44
  if you just have to admit that I have a problem,
• 26:48
  that in and of itself is painful, and then actually
• 26:50
  working to fix that problem is even more painful. So
• 26:58
  is that a car that was okay? Bro, it's scary?
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: Pause we can.
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: My heart is racing, but yeah, that's I'm so distracted
• 27:12
  right now.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: Yes, there's a lot going on like this.
• 27:15
  Speaker 3: Is I don't know if that made sense. Yes, yeah
• 27:19
  I was.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: I was going to say something similar to that, and
• 27:22
  just like it didn't. It definitely was a burden at
• 27:24
  times because it's hard, but it never felt like a
• 27:27
  conditional thing, like I was doing it because I chose
• 27:30
  to do it and I stuck with it. But in
• 27:33
  those times when I was like I just want to
• 27:35
  watch YouTube, it's like why is this shower so cold?
• 27:37
  And not like I have to do this so Jesus
• 27:39
  will love me, I'm like, the thought even crossed my mind.
• 27:43
  Is that thing still going on with the alert being on?
• 27:46
  And I don't know to check? Sorry, oh it doesn't.
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: I shouldn't.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: I just assumed that that thing was going to disappear.
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: It's not gone.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: All right, Well it's fine. You just the video just
• 28:11
  missed it, like tornado that passed through.
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: That's what happened.
• 28:14
  Speaker 3: There was an alert. It made the camera stop. Hopefully
• 28:17
  you're still watching.
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, But but yeah, when whenever I was like, oh
• 28:25
  I I'm taking this cool shower and it's annoying, and
• 28:28
  it's like my mind went to It's like and when
• 28:31
  I like get the Worm Show, I'm like, I'm gonna
• 28:33
  thank Jesus for this, and it's like it's it's not
• 28:37
  a conditional thing, like I know, I don't need to
• 28:40
  do that to be a good Christian or this or that.
• 28:44
  So while it was a burden because it was hard,
• 28:47
  it was it was a growth moment, but not a
• 28:52
  necessary thing to do, I think, is what I would
• 28:56
  say it.
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, speaking of things being a burden. Oh yeah, maybe
• 29:03
  we can talk about how doing spire basically hopefully kind
• 29:08
  of sort of every day during Lent a year ago,
• 29:17
  because if anybody doesn't know, that was our goal. We
• 29:20
  said at the beginning of Lent we were going to
• 29:22
  do aspire every single day and that was our goal
• 29:25
  as a group to try and do that just as
• 29:29
  kind of a personal challenge so that we're practicing what
• 29:32
  we preach on here.
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so how was the daily spire thing? I guess
• 29:38
  like that's the question, so will answered first.
• 29:41
  Speaker 3: I'll be honest, it can't. I don't. I would say.
• 29:49
  Speaker 4: I I'm not a big I'm not a big plan
• 29:54
  er guy.
• 29:56
  Speaker 3: I've never really like I.
• 29:59
  Speaker 4: I think it's valuable, but it's more of something that
• 30:03
  helps me reflect.
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: Like Michael, you said that earlier.
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: I don't know, we weren't recording Saint Peter's detraction Santilize.
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I saw this posts it's like there because
• 30:15
  we're in the chat. Here's the second one. All right,
• 30:22
  you want to try to finish it by seven? Yeah,
• 30:25
  sure possible.
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: You would to talk about Spire stuff.
• 30:28
  Speaker 3: So you're not a planner guy. He uses a reflection.
• 30:36
  It's it's a really great reflection tool. But I've never
• 30:41
  really been.
• 30:44
  Speaker 4: The way that I see it is that using the
• 30:46
  Spire as a tool for a daily plan is as
• 30:51
  like a really solid way to do it. I just
• 30:55
  need to be better about actually planning my day, and
• 30:58
  so I'm not.
• 31:00
  Speaker 3: I wasn't very.
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: I had things that I did every day that had
• 31:05
  to do with Spire, But I think the one that
• 31:08
  I struggled with the most was the evangelizing one, because
• 31:12
  it's all meant to go into where you're like sharing
• 31:16
  the faithor in some way sharing love, But that was
• 31:21
  hard to do and hard to figure out like a
• 31:24
  specific example every day, Like I could kind of come
• 31:28
  up with some which I guess is the point, because
• 31:30
  it helped me to think about it more, and so
• 31:32
  I was I would think more often about Like it
• 31:36
  definitely made me think, Okay, I should probably work out more,
• 31:39
  and so I did more workouts because I wanted to
• 31:42
  keep the physical one checked. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 31:45
  Speaker 3: You know it was good.
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: It was a good I use it a lot as
• 31:48
  a reflection of like looking back, Okay, how did my
• 31:50
  day go?
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: Where could I improve?
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: I think it's better as a reflection because some of
• 31:56
  them was like if there's a like for physical, it's like, yeah,
• 31:59
  you can plan out work and you can do those things.
• 32:01
  There's more to physical than just working out, but like
• 32:04
  you can plan that spiritual like you can plan prayer things,
• 32:09
  and you could technically plan relational stuff. It's like oh
• 32:11
  I need to call this person or go out and
• 32:13
  do this with that person. But something like evangelization, that's
• 32:17
  an experience that is in the moments, Like I'm going
• 32:20
  to plan on evangelizing today. That won't necessarily work out
• 32:24
  because how will you evangelize because that depends entirely in
• 32:27
  the moment.
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: But also if you I bet it would work better
• 32:31
  if you were.
• 32:34
  Speaker 4: Maybe this is just maybe I'm not the best example,
• 32:37
  just because I haven't gotten that discipline yet to plan
• 32:40
  out my days. But if I had to, I bet
• 32:43
  if you sat down and it was sectioned out better.
• 32:47
  Speaker 3: Like that would really help it help you avoid.
• 32:51
  Speaker 4: Kind of falling into the trap of my life is
• 32:54
  really about my work. And then I knew this and
• 32:56
  I do this, Yeah, because it is mapped out in
• 32:58
  a way that it focuses on a person, on you
• 33:00
  as a person, and like if you were planning for
• 33:02
  the next day, I could be easier because then you go, Okay,
• 33:06
  I don't have anything for evangelizing tomorrow. But what can
• 33:09
  I do with intentionality that I that I wouldn't normally do,
• 33:13
  which is really what the point is, the why it's there.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: What could I do such that tomorrow when I write
• 33:18
  down my evangelization that I have something to do because
• 33:20
  I know that won't. It's like, is this something that
• 33:22
  I could make happen? I could see that in terms
• 33:25
  of planning, yeah, in terms of not like make it happens,
• 33:29
  like I need to talk to you about Jesus.
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: That might work, but.
• 33:35
  Speaker 4: Like evangelization would be acts of service, yes, yeah, and
• 33:38
  things that you would have to plan out and maybe
• 33:41
  the like, the only reason that you didn't do the
• 33:43
  alms giving is because it wasn't a plan ahead.
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that that was my thing is I didn't plan
• 33:47
  ahead for that. I was like, well, I'll look at
• 33:50
  into things, and then I was busy a lot of
• 33:52
  days doing stuff that I had already planned and all that,
• 33:56
  and then it's like, well I just never was like, oh,
• 34:00
  I definitely have a free weekend, and so it's like
• 34:02
  I'll think about stuff. Then it's like that never really
• 34:04
  happened where I was like, I definitely can do it now,
• 34:09
  but yeah, definitely not planning I.
• 34:12
  Speaker 3: Think going forward. Also, I don't know how you did
• 34:14
  it or I think you wrote it down like physically.
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: I think I'm going to keep on trying to do
• 34:21
  it every day and I'm going to try and physically
• 34:25
  write it down with a pen because I tried to
• 34:28
  do it on my phone and that was just your
• 34:32
  phone is such a distracting little piece of metal and glass.
• 34:35
  It's like if you try and do anything truly productive
• 34:38
  on there, it's so hard. So I think also having
• 34:42
  something separate, so maybe you have a notebook or like
• 34:45
  you have a journal that also would help a lot. Yeah,
• 34:51
  but I do as much as I want to just
• 34:54
  say that I should use it as a reflection because
• 34:58
  like that's what works for me. I think you're right,
• 35:01
  because like I'm thinking about it now, and like I
• 35:05
  every day I probably could have thought of something that
• 35:09
  fit four out of the five. Maybe one day I
• 35:12
  miss physical or evangelical or whatever. But at the end
• 35:18
  of the day, like like you're saying, there are a
• 35:21
  lot of things where you have to plan them, and
• 35:24
  if you don't plan them, you're just not going to
• 35:25
  do them. And then you look back and you're like,
• 35:27
  why didn't I do that? And it's like, oh, well,
• 35:30
  there was this thing. This is kind of unrelated but
• 35:35
  not I mean I can tie it in. There's I
• 35:38
  saw a quote and it was something like people worry
• 35:41
  about going back in time to change something small and
• 35:45
  messing up the future, but nobody ever thinks about the
• 35:47
  fact that doing something small and the present could change
• 35:49
  the future. And I was like and thinking about that
• 35:53
  in relation to this, It's like, if you think about
• 35:55
  just writing down tomorrow, I'm or not tomorrow, maybe a
• 36:00
  week from now. If you want to plant had that far,
• 36:02
  you're going to do some kind of volunteer work. Maybe
• 36:07
  you're going to plan out a time to do something evangelical,
• 36:12
  like that little thing might actually lead to you do it.
• 36:16
  And that's that's not to say you're not going to
• 36:17
  do stuff in the moment, because like I've had conversations
• 36:20
  with people and I've been working on the podcast, and
• 36:23
  I count that as even evangelizing. I can't speak, and
• 36:27
  I've had you know, religious, faith based spiritual conversations with people,
• 36:32
  and I've tried to deepen my own faith and help
• 36:34
  other people with theirs. And it's like that all happens,
• 36:37
  but there are days on the days where I don't
• 36:39
  do it. It's like, oh, I just didn't have an opportunity,
• 36:41
  and it's the opportunity isn't always just going to present itself,
• 36:46
  and sometimes you have to create the opportunity. And you're
• 36:48
  not going to create the opportunity if you don't go
• 36:50
  out of your way to do it. So I think
• 36:53
  going forward, I want to physically write it down, But
• 36:58
  I also think I'm not going to make the excuse
• 37:00
  anymore that I'm just gonna use it as a reflection
• 37:02
  because I think if you really want to make the
• 37:04
  most of it, and you want to get the most
• 37:06
  out of it. You don't have to plan ahead. But
• 37:11
  I think that that's the way to get the most
• 37:13
  out of it. The more I listened to us talking
• 37:16
  about it, I can see that. Yeah.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: For me, Like the thing I was best at was
• 37:24
  writing it down because I said I would do it,
• 37:26
  and so I did it. This is like every night
• 37:29
  because I was writing a daily journal, because I do
• 37:31
  that during lens and so it's like I physically wrote
• 37:34
  down SBI and did that and you saw that in
• 37:36
  the previous videos, and so like, yeah, because if I
• 37:41
  could set myself to do something like I have something
• 37:43
  tangible that I need to do and I need to
• 37:44
  make sure I go to bed ten minutes earlier in
• 37:46
  order to do that.
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: I can do that most of the time.
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: And I was still able to get the eight hours
• 37:50
  of sleep most of the time. And so like that
• 37:54
  type of discipline I'm good at in terms of well
• 37:57
  I need to do this, and so like, hey, the
• 38:00
  check off the box type of discipline I'm fairly good at.
• 38:03
  So long as I commit myself to it, I can.
• 38:06
  The only thing that would like break me off of
• 38:08
  that discipline is me my mind convincing myself that I
• 38:13
  shouldn't continue doing that because it's a waste of time
• 38:16
  or this or that, and it has to like logical
• 38:19
  arguments or can what break me away from those habits.
• 38:25
  I mean, day to day failures happened, but like then
• 38:28
  I would be like, like, I gotta get back into
• 38:30
  it unless I like, well, it's not working out for
• 38:32
  me for this or that reason. But there were a
• 38:35
  number of times, especially towards the end, where I started
• 38:39
  thinking about it less and just like looking back in
• 38:42
  the day, last couple of days, like I had nothing
• 38:46
  for evangelical, I had nothing for intellectual. It's like I
• 38:49
  just like dash nothing there.
• 38:52
  Speaker 3: It's like you just do that and then this this
• 38:54
  is my experience. You do that and then you're like, oh,
• 38:56
  I'll do better tomorrow. And it's like you don't make
• 38:58
  any plan for tomorrow and you do the same.
• 39:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess I didn't even think about that. I
• 39:02
  was that was my whole perspective. I was like, well,
• 39:05
  I basically do this stuff like each day anyway, you know,
• 39:08
  da da da da.
• 39:09
  Speaker 3: Either then like it would be ideal. I feel like.
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: If you're gonna plan, like if you have things you
• 39:16
  have to do tomorrow. It'd be nice if you had
• 39:20
  like aspire, if like there was a big section for
• 39:25
  each category.
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: Sub sub sections in each category. Was like, you don't
• 39:28
  need to do everything in the sub sections, but like
• 39:31
  and spiritually you've got like well types of prayer or
• 39:34
  like experiences or this or that. Physical is like working out,
• 39:37
  enjoying something, doing this. Intellectuals like thinking about something, absorbing something,
• 39:44
  listening to someone or something like that, and just like
• 39:47
  sub sections with like what he there are ideas for
• 39:50
  what you can do in it in a practical way.
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: Is that I wasn't thinking.
• 39:53
  Speaker 4: I wasn't thinking it having ideas, which is a good
• 39:57
  I mean, that's true. I think that there would be
• 39:59
  good example pages you can have, but like I'd want
• 40:02
  it to be where like if you open your book,
• 40:07
  you're like, Okay, I have stuff I have to do tomorrow.
• 40:09
  I have to go to this, and I have to
• 40:11
  go to this, and I go to this. Where do
• 40:12
  those three things fit? And then you fill it out
• 40:16
  in each one and then you're like, okay, what am
• 40:17
  I missing and what can I do tomorrow? Fill in
• 40:20
  these spots, so then it's not like Okay, I've got
• 40:23
  to do my spire plan and then my real plan
• 40:25
  data plan, because your daily plan should just be morphed,
• 40:29
  like it should just be. The spire is just supposed
• 40:32
  to help round it all out.
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: So things like well, I know I have classes tomorrow
• 40:37
  and I've got time, and I want to go on
• 40:38
  a run tomorrow. So it's like these things and it's like, okay,
• 40:41
  so I'm going on a run tomorrow, so that'll be
• 40:43
  able to check off physical these classes. It's like I'll
• 40:47
  be I'll try to be intentional in the classes and
• 40:49
  ask the questions like that can be intellectual. And it's like, well,
• 40:53
  is there anything particularly I could do in prayers like
• 40:55
  I could do my regular daily stuff. It's like, oh,
• 40:57
  I can go to mass, so I can. And then
• 40:59
  just things like well, I just have to wake up
• 41:02
  at you know, six forty five to go to a
• 41:04
  seven fifteen mass, so that's I can manage that, just
• 41:07
  a little less sleep to nine, and it's like okay,
• 41:09
  I can fill in the spitual and just to plan
• 41:11
  the next day is like, well, these are the things
• 41:13
  I know I have to do that connects to those,
• 41:16
  And then it's like, well, is there something I can
• 41:19
  do evangelical. It's like, well, I've got some time here.
• 41:21
  It's like, what can I do in that way that
• 41:23
  can fill it out?
• 41:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's where I feel like it could work the
• 41:28
  best I can see that.
• 41:29
  Speaker 3: I've never never really did it that way.
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: I do a lot of like planning my next day
• 41:37
  mentally before I go to bed, sometimes, especially when with
• 41:42
  Exodus stuff, because I made myself get eight out of sleep.
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: So I'm like, okay, well.
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: If I want to go out to Mass in the morning,
• 41:48
  because I have a nine o'clock class, I don't want
• 41:50
  to go to the eight o'clock Mass. That rushes me.
• 41:54
  So I'm like, okay, so I'm going to seven fifteen Mass,
• 41:56
  in which case I need to wake up at six
• 41:58
  forty five to be able to get there on time.
• 42:01
  And then it's like, okay, that means I need to
• 42:03
  go to bed by ten forty five. I need to
• 42:06
  be like onto the sheets, closed eyes by ten forty
• 42:09
  five to get eight hours of sleep. And so like
• 42:10
  that sort of type of planning has really beneficial to
• 42:14
  me because like that actually means I am disciplined and
• 42:17
  I can get to maths in the morning, or I
• 42:19
  can do this, or I can actually go run instead
• 42:21
  of being like I really love running, it's like, okay,
• 42:24
  well I'm going to plan on running in this timeframe
• 42:26
  in which I know I have time, and it's really beneficial.
• 42:29
  But I never really thought about, like, well, what else
• 42:32
  can I add to to fulfill this spire stuff?
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we should. We should make one of those. I know,
• 42:39
  I don't know how. That's difficult, so you have to
• 42:42
  find a printer. We do bulk.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: Well, I wanted to make like booklets.
• 42:50
  Speaker 4: Like a daily journal, though I would actually use Yeah,
• 42:53
  I just don't. I don't first, but I don't like
• 42:55
  the little notebooks.
• 42:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I want like.
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: A big one that's got like a calendar in it.
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, those things.
• 43:02
  Speaker 3: Imagine having like a big one where we should talk
• 43:07
  about this after Yeah here, But it's like you have
• 43:11
  almost like it's like a book, but it's also a calendar,
• 43:15
  and you have a page or not a page, maybe
• 43:17
  a section for every day of the year even and
• 43:20
  you can just like write stuff down and if you
• 43:22
  want to plan two days ahead, maybe you can plan
• 43:24
  two days ahead.
• 43:25
  Speaker 4: Well, because people like business like people that like have
• 43:28
  a lot going on, that is what they do.
• 43:30
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm just.
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: Still the making our own.
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: The difficulty there would be I should talk about this
• 43:37
  after well, yes, but the difficulty there would be the
• 43:39
  things to write down. So I think the best way
• 43:42
  to do that to start is to just like get
• 43:46
  a large notebook type thing or a calendar journal, and
• 43:51
  I want to get a count, right, this is what
• 43:53
  I'm doing tomorrow. Yes, or you can plan a whole
• 43:56
  week in advance or whatnot is, but like I need
• 43:58
  to get a run in tomorrow. I need to do
• 43:59
  this tomorrow, need to do that tomorrow. So you can
• 44:01
  check off and then you check it off throughout the
• 44:03
  day and then you've heard you add stuff at the
• 44:06
  end of the day. But like that I think would
• 44:08
  be a good way of getting started on it, because
• 44:10
  like I don't know how to do. It's like get
• 44:12
  a calendar journal and try it and it hurts.
• 44:15
  Speaker 3: You also have like five pages in the beginning and
• 44:17
  it has like a page for spiritual, physical, intellectual relation
• 44:20
  or evangelical and it has examples just like if you're
• 44:22
  trying to think of things, Oh that's actually it's like
• 44:26
  I can't think of anything evangelical I can do, and
• 44:29
  it's like maybe you should go I don't know pick up.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: We should do an evangelical linegan where we can figure
• 44:37
  that out.
• 44:38
  Speaker 4: Interesting, Okay, so I talk about that good plan from
• 44:41
  moving forward. That's what I'm going to try to do too,
• 44:43
  is use it as a way to plan for the
• 44:45
  day ahead, to be intentional.
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: With what I'm with my time. Yeah.
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: But so we've talked a lot about LINT and I
• 44:55
  don't know how much longer we want to keep this going.
• 44:57
  But I just want to talk a little bit about Easter.
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: You know.
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: It's like the whole lead up to Lynd was Easter. Yeah,
• 45:06
  it's fine, we talked to good stuff, but like now
• 45:09
  we're in Easter, Like, what is there a difference now? Like,
• 45:14
  I don't know, what do you guys thoughts on Easter?
• 45:20
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't say this, I'll just say it.
• 45:27
  So I think this is a very kind of personal
• 45:33
  spiritual thing. I guess I don't know if this is
• 45:37
  a common thing. I felt like Holy Week for me,
• 45:40
  it was really really hard and really really difficult, and
• 45:43
  I was struggling with a lot, like the stuff that
• 45:47
  I've been working on all that and some of the
• 45:48
  stuff I've been doing really well with I for some reason,
• 45:51
  all of Holy Week, I was just like not feeling it,
• 45:54
  and I.
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: Was just because the end was so close, and it's like,
• 45:57
  I just.
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: I don't know what it was about it, but and
• 46:00
  maybe that's a spiritual thing. Maybe the devil war's harder
• 46:03
  during Holy Week because he was coming. But so I
• 46:08
  really all of Holy Week, I was just struggling really
• 46:13
  really hard, and it was just like every day was
• 46:15
  a struggle and I felt like I could not catch
• 46:17
  a break. And it was really interesting because yesterday.
• 46:26
  Speaker 2: This was Easter.
• 46:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yesterday, sorry, yesterday, it was Easter. Today is Monday.
• 46:30
  Yesterday was Sunday. It felt yesterday like again, this is
• 46:38
  just a spiritual thing. I don't know if everybody feels
• 46:42
  like this, but I did where it kind of felt
• 46:45
  at least in the morning when I first wake up,
• 46:48
  I just felt very kind of rejuvenated and very I
• 46:53
  felt like a little bit of the weight it had
• 46:55
  been lifted off of me. And an example was I
• 47:00
  was supposed to get up at like seven to be
• 47:03
  able to go pick up my grandma for Masks, and
• 47:05
  then the mass we're gonna go to got pushed back
• 47:08
  like two hours, and so we were gonna go to
• 47:10
  a different mass, and then I came upstairs and my
• 47:12
  brother was like, we're not going to that mass anymore,
• 47:16
  and my mom said the same thing, and I was like, oh,
• 47:19
  that's fine, and they were like, oh, I totally thought
• 47:22
  you were gonna be upset about that, and it's that
• 47:24
  had happened the day before, I guarantee I would have
• 47:26
  been so mad and I would have been like I
• 47:28
  could slept for two hours and been all whatever. But
• 47:31
  I just I didn't feel the tension or the angst
• 47:35
  or any of the stress or whatever that I had
• 47:37
  been feeling all week, and I just felt very I
• 47:43
  don't know, I felt like the weight had been lifted
• 47:46
  a little bit. And that didn't necessarily last all day,
• 47:48
  but definitely, just you know, as the days getting going,
• 47:52
  as I'm kind of like reflecting on everything, I definitely
• 47:58
  it's not just symbolic, like I think we need to
• 48:03
  always remember that the Easter is not just a day
• 48:07
  where we're like, oh, this thing happened two thousand years ago,
• 48:12
  and you know, we're just gonna remember that and it's
• 48:14
  like all whatever, it makes it feel good. It's happy Easter, bunny,
• 48:18
  and you know, colored eggs, like it's not symbolic exclusively. Sure,
• 48:24
  there's some symbolism whatever, but.
• 48:28
  Speaker 2: It's real.
• 48:28
  Speaker 3: We all I feel like, maybe again, maybe this is
• 48:31
  just me, but I feel like we always forget that
• 48:33
  in some senses, the spiritual world and all of that
• 48:36
  is infinitely more real than everything that we experience here
• 48:41
  in the physical world. And there that's there's like stuff
• 48:46
  going on that you can't see, that you can't understand,
• 48:51
  and it's real, like the effects of things like the Crucifixion,
• 48:55
  the resurrection that's not just some crazy event that happened
• 48:58
  two thousand years ago that like has real tangible effects
• 49:02
  in your life now like today, if you love it, yes,
• 49:07
  And I think again, like I said, I didn't last
• 49:11
  all day, but when I woke up, I just I
• 49:14
  was so much more aware of that, I think, and
• 49:17
  just thinking I've been struggling so much all week. And
• 49:22
  then you think about the Crucifixion, It's like, this is
• 49:27
  this event that kind of is the summary of all
• 49:29
  of our suffering, and it's like, like Jordan Peterson says,
• 49:32
  it's the most technically the most like horrible, painful story
• 49:39
  that you could possibly imagine. And you go from that
• 49:46
  to the resurrection, which is Jesus conquering all the death
• 49:50
  and the suffering and the pain, and then it's so
• 49:53
  easy to just forget what that actually means and the
• 49:56
  fact that that has real effects in your life, Like
• 50:02
  it doesn't have to You can like stop that. You
• 50:05
  can prevent it if you turn away from it, if
• 50:07
  you ignore it. But actually you can't stop it. Well
• 50:10
  you can't stop it, but you can you can ignore it.
• 50:12
  You can ignore it, I guess is what I mean
• 50:14
  is there could be you know, Jesus is chasing after
• 50:18
  and he wants to give you eternal life. Essentially, he
• 50:22
  wants to help you conquer your pain and he wants
• 50:25
  to help you to overcome death. And that was the
• 50:29
  other thing that you said something earlier about it wasn't me,
• 50:32
  Like I wasn't doing it. Good things happen to me,
• 50:38
  Like we can't do it on our own. And Jesus
• 50:42
  is there. He conquered death, and he's there to help
• 50:46
  us do the same thing and to do the same
• 50:48
  thing for us. And I don't know, I'm just I'm
• 50:51
  talking a lot, but it's it's not symbolic. Easter is
• 50:56
  not It's a real thing. And I don't remember if
• 51:00
  it was on the podcast, or if it was something
• 51:02
  else we were talking about. It was the Bible in
• 51:04
  the ear. I don't know if you were there, but
• 51:06
  we were talking about how God is timeless and how
• 51:10
  we were talking about it in the context of the transfiguration,
• 51:14
  and that somebody is saying something about how Jesus and
• 51:19
  Moses and Elijah at different times all went up to
• 51:23
  the top of the same mountain, and it's like somebody
• 51:25
  was saying, like, well, if it was actually all at
• 51:26
  the same time kind of thing. Whatever. But we again,
• 51:31
  we forget that God is a timeless God, and he
• 51:34
  is the same now as he was two thousand years ago,
• 51:37
  and the effects of the Crucifixion and the resurrection now
• 51:40
  are exactly the same as they were two thousand years ago.
• 51:43
  And it's so easy to forget that, and it's so
• 51:45
  easy to think that it's all just symbolic and pictures
• 51:47
  and books and stories and you hear it at Mass
• 51:50
  and you know, you fold your hands and whatever. I
• 51:54
  feel like, that's such an easy trap to fall into.
• 51:56
  Speaker 4: That is actually, I believe the main trap. That's the
• 52:00
  only travel That was the first trap he laid, which
• 52:02
  was he's not really real and he's like, hmm, that
• 52:06
  was like the number one lie. And what I learned
• 52:08
  this lant was what it all really comes down to
• 52:14
  is so there's a scripture that says, if you ask
• 52:20
  for something in prayer and believe that you have received it,
• 52:23
  it is yours.
• 52:25
  Speaker 3: That's in mark.
• 52:28
  Speaker 4: If I really believed that, then everything that I asked
• 52:32
  for and I believed it was mine. And of course
• 52:36
  it's like, it's not a real prayer. If I just
• 52:37
  say I want a million dollars, it's.
• 52:39
  Speaker 3: Not a real prayer.
• 52:40
  Speaker 4: We're talking a prayer of it's a communication of your
• 52:43
  deepest heart with God is what a prayer is. And
• 52:46
  so when you know how to do that and you
• 52:48
  practice that, which is why they tell you to pray
• 52:51
  all the time, then when you ask for a grace,
• 52:55
  like if you would say, Jesus, save me from this fear.
• 53:03
  If I believe I've been saved from that fear, and
• 53:07
  I really believe it, it is true that I've been
• 53:09
  saved from the fear, because that's what he did.
• 53:12
  Speaker 3: He already did it.
• 53:13
  Speaker 4: But we all are the our journey is just believing it,
• 53:17
  like just coming to believe that's all it is.
• 53:20
  Speaker 3: And so then a saint is someone that just believes it,
• 53:24
  and I'm it's crazy.
• 53:25
  Speaker 4: It is crazy because the number one thing that stops
• 53:28
  us is just a lie that we believe more than
• 53:30
  what we think we believe. Because it's like, if I
• 53:34
  believe that that floor is there, then I'll just step
• 53:36
  there and then I can walk in the other room.
• 53:39
  But if I if you ask me, is the floor there?
• 53:42
  And I'm like, oh yeah, But when it comes down
• 53:44
  to it, I don't really believe the floor is there,
• 53:47
  then I'm not gonna walk, and then that room I
• 53:49
  can never get to. And that's inherently what I really believe.
• 53:52
  And so the whole journey, this whole thing is just
• 53:56
  not believing any lies, but believe and not believing things
• 53:59
  that change my feelings or my thoughts or my opinions
• 54:02
  or the way I see the world, which is, oh,
• 54:04
  a symbol is some sort of weird, abstract, disconnected thing,
• 54:08
  but it's like got it its own reality, so I
• 54:10
  like respect it. It's like, no, this is this is
• 54:12
  either real or it's not real. And we have such
• 54:15
  a miss We have no idea how to for those
• 54:21
  things to be real. But the people that you know
• 54:23
  that you come in contact with that believe it. It's
• 54:27
  like that's a different person, like you know it when
• 54:30
  you talk to them. And one of the things that
• 54:34
  stood out to me is that the word symbol comes
• 54:36
  from a Greek word or the Greek word for symbol
• 54:39
  or whatever, means two rivers.
• 54:41
  Speaker 3: Interconnecting and becoming one. So a symbol is not like.
• 54:45
  Speaker 4: Here's a reflection of a sort of image of something
• 54:49
  that you can't really see. It's like a symbol is
• 54:51
  where there's a spiritual reality that meets and marries a
• 54:55
  physical reality, and that's literally what it is.
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: Jonathan Page says something about how a symbol is essentially
• 55:04
  a lower physical truth that points towards a higher spiritual truth,
• 55:12
  and it's kind of the same thing is that it's
• 55:15
  a similar concept. It's a similar concept. It's not exact.
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: It focuses on different things.
• 55:19
  Speaker 3: But I guess it probably depends what you mean by
• 55:22
  a symbol. I don't know, we don't need to get
• 55:23
  into that really.
• 55:25
  Speaker 4: Whole video, but that's probably that's probably a more well
• 55:28
  rounded way. Yeah, basically, I would say that's probably more accurate.
• 55:32
  The way where I meant it was literal is that
• 55:34
  the Eucharist is not Okay, maybe it's better to say
• 55:38
  the Eucharist is not just a symbol. A symbol is
• 55:41
  where two realities interconnect and it has a certain being
• 55:44
  on its own. So that picture of Mary, it's an
• 55:47
  icon of Mary, just like the word is an icon
• 55:49
  of Jesus, but it's also his word. So then it's
• 55:53
  also her image, but it's not her so and then
• 55:57
  but then a symbol.
• 55:57
  Speaker 3: Would be not a symbol. No, the Eucharist would be the.
• 56:03
  Speaker 4: Literal joining, like the marriage of those two, because that's
• 56:07
  what this whole thing is about. Like this is all
• 56:10
  about a relationship and a marriage. It is not about
• 56:14
  anything else. We just add all that stuff and we
• 56:17
  separate it all and we categorize it all so that
• 56:19
  we think we have better control and grasp of it.
• 56:21
  But it's just like when you're falling in love or
• 56:23
  you commit your life to somebody, it's like, that's not logical.
• 56:28
  Love's not logical. It's not logical that you would die
• 56:31
  and be skinned alive and burned alive because you're not
• 56:35
  willing to step on an icon a picture. That's not logical.
• 56:38
  But that's the rawest, truest form of love. That's why
• 56:42
  divorces are at an all time high. That's why nobody's
• 56:44
  getting married. That's why there's no religion. It's because it's like, well, logically,
• 56:48
  this doesn't make me feel good, it doesn't make any
• 56:51
  sense why I would do that. I'm not doing it,
• 56:53
  and then the world falls apart because we've lost the point,
• 56:57
  which is that you're in a relationship with a mystery.
• 57:00
  Speaker 3: That's what it is. Also, people think that that's impossible.
• 57:06
  I think you hear, especially in the broken, just depressed,
• 57:11
  anxiety filled world that we live in, people hear us
• 57:17
  sit here and say like, it's about a relationship with God,
• 57:20
  and they're like, I don't know what that means. But
• 57:22
  even if I knew what that meant, I don't think
• 57:24
  that's possible. And I think that that that's probably the
• 57:29
  biggest problem is just the people. It's POSI That's where
• 57:32
  I was. I was thinking about this the other day.
• 57:35
  I wrote it down on my phone because I was like,
• 57:37
  that's a good thought. And I don't remember that, but
• 57:39
  I can't remember exactly what the thought was, but something
• 57:42
  along the lines of is it more likely that the
• 57:50
  people who believe that they can have a relationship with God,
• 57:57
  have been indoctrinated into believing a lie, or into believing
• 58:05
  the lies of a religion that promises them impossible things.
• 58:08
  Or is it more likely that the people who don't
• 58:11
  believe that it's possible to have a relationship with God
• 58:14
  have been indoctrinated into believing the lies of a world
• 58:18
  that tells them that there are impossible things to begin with.
• 58:21
  And that was really convoluted, But I really like it
• 58:24
  because I think that.
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: We see people flip it on his head.
• 58:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we see people who believe fully as fully as
• 58:33
  you can, Like you see the most joyful, happy people,
• 58:38
  and you're like, I can't feel that, Like that's impossible
• 58:42
  for me to reach that level. It's impossible for me
• 58:47
  to ever believe that relationship that's possible. That's exactly where
• 58:51
  I was a yur ago, where I was like, no,
• 58:54
  I don't believe Jesus left me. I do not believe.
• 58:57
  Speaker 4: That he was really real, Like he's he's but it's
• 59:00
  not real, Like it's not real in the way that
• 59:03
  I need it to be real, which I can't even articulate.
• 59:07
  It's just I know in my heart it's like he's
• 59:10
  not real, but it's but I tell you what that is.
• 59:17
  Step one is just being honest about that, because the
• 59:22
  great news is that it's just a belief. Like you
• 59:26
  just you don't believe something, but you can believe it
• 59:32
  with time with grace, with spending time with God. I mean,
• 59:37
  how much time do you spend trying to get to
• 59:40
  know this reality.
• 59:41
  Speaker 3: It's like, I don't believe Riley's a nice guy?
• 59:45
  Speaker 4: Okay, how often have I talked to him to figure
• 59:47
  it out for myself? Well, I just hear a lot
• 59:50
  of people don't like Riley. Yeah, well a lot of
• 59:52
  people die for Riley.
• 59:54
  Speaker 3: Well sorry, buddy.
• 59:56
  Speaker 4: Apparently if I hang out with Riley and I'm close
• 59:58
  with him, I don't get to do whatever I wan want,
• 1:00:00
  and I'm more inclined towards that right now.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 3: And that's basically what it is.
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 4: So it's like, well, I promise you, if you want
• 1:00:07
  to believe it, it will be true. And if you
• 1:00:11
  don't know how to believe it, man, keep trying, because
• 1:00:14
  that's what this.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 3: Is all about.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: To bring it back to that passage from Mark that
• 1:00:19
  you're talking about, it's like, if you truly believe and ask,
• 1:00:23
  you will receive.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 3: That's a promise from God.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 2: That's a promise from God.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: But it's so difficult to believe because it's just like.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 5: Because we're trying to because then my mind goes to, well,
• 1:00:36
  if I truly believe and ask for something just completely
• 1:00:39
  utterly stupid, and it's like, well, that clearly isn't.
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 3: Gonna happen possible and you will to be possible.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just like my mind goes to it's like, well,
• 1:00:49
  I could ask for this completely stupid thing, and it's like,
• 1:00:52
  but then it's not like fully being present with God
• 1:00:56
  in that way. And it's like, well, yeah, well, if
• 1:00:58
  if it is just being fully present God, then how
• 1:01:00
  I'm even asking it because that just God saying stuff.
• 1:01:02
  And it's like and there's lots of chaos that can
• 1:01:05
  happen through that. But then it's like, well, yeah, you
• 1:01:07
  gotta try and work. And it's like, yeah, obviously I
• 1:01:10
  know I don't fully believe that in the way that
• 1:01:14
  like some of the saints have and it's like how
• 1:01:17
  could they do that? I don't know, Yes, you do know, Yes,
• 1:01:20
  that's true. And the reason I say I don't know
• 1:01:24
  is parts of those doubts that that interacts with all
• 1:01:27
  of it.
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 4: It's because the devil just said that you don't know, yeah,
• 1:01:30
  And then but we're just like, oh, yeah, I don't know.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 3: But then you do, like Jesus says, I'm the Way,
• 1:01:36
  the Truth and the life. And then we're like, I
• 1:01:38
  don't know what the way is true.
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 4: Because we don't believe it, but we it's because we
• 1:01:44
  allow these other thoughts to be in our mind.
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but you can you can fight against that through practice,
• 1:01:51
  like yeah, practice prayer and all that. And then I
• 1:01:54
  have noticed times in which I've asked for stuff and
• 1:01:57
  it has almost crazily just like happened. And I don't
• 1:02:02
  really think about specific examples, but like there's just times
• 1:02:04
  there's like, Lord, give me the strength to do this
• 1:02:08
  or that, or like make this thing easier. And then
• 1:02:11
  I look back the next day and it's like that
• 1:02:15
  was a lot easier than I was expecting it to.
• 1:02:16
  And it's like because there was. And then and then
• 1:02:19
  I could say to myself, well, I mean, it's kind
• 1:02:21
  of that could have happened anyway. It's like you but
• 1:02:24
  it's like, yeah, sure, there's there's rational, normal explanations for that.
• 1:02:31
  But God can work through the rational just as he
• 1:02:33
  can through the irrational.
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 4: Like, no, God is working through the rational. That's how
• 1:02:38
  he works.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: There, you go, he does work.
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 4: The devil says, ah, yeah, he could just work he
• 1:02:44
  is the rational.
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he also works through things that can go against
• 1:02:48
  our understandings of science or this that it's like rising
• 1:02:51
  from the dead is scientifically impossible, and so he can
• 1:02:54
  work through these.
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 3: Only as far as we understand science.
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 1: True, true, only, But he can work through these super
• 1:03:00
  natural miracles. But then there's also the natural miracles of well,
• 1:03:03
  there's a completely rational ble explanation for this. I'm like, yeah,
• 1:03:07
  and God set up the whole world from the very
• 1:03:09
  beginning of the universe to result in this miracle happening
• 1:03:14
  just at the right time for you. Like like what
• 1:03:17
  coincidences some people call like God incidences, Like God made
• 1:03:21
  this coincidence happens, Like that's very likely. It's like, yeah,
• 1:03:24
  it could have just been a coincidence. But also maybe
• 1:03:26
  God changed that proton right at the very beginning of
• 1:03:29
  the universe to change things just slightly enough that this
• 1:03:33
  thing would happen exactly when you need it, because He
• 1:03:36
  created the universe for you. And it's like those are
• 1:03:39
  the types of beliefs. That's so hard to do.
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 4: But it's like, well what about this. Imagine I what
• 1:03:45
  if a coincidence? Calling something a coincidence is an insult
• 1:03:48
  to God?
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 2: Ohoh could be because.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 4: If it stood out as meaningful to you, and God
• 1:03:54
  made everything and is in everything and has everything, and
• 1:03:57
  everything is within Him, then everything that sticks out to
• 1:04:01
  in a special way is orchestrated by Him. And when
• 1:04:03
  you call it a coincidence, you cast off His loving
• 1:04:07
  grace in your life and call it this is just
• 1:04:09
  random luck that I just happen to psychologicially.
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: So if you go to the store and you randomly
• 1:04:14
  see like one of your best friends from high school
• 1:04:16
  that you haven't seen in like six years, Like, what
• 1:04:18
  a coincidence that we heard today?
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: It's like, no, you can.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 3: It's a secular frames.
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 2: I'm so thankful.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 3: That's awesome. And that's why we.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 4: Don't believe anything is because we've literally got that ingrained
• 1:04:30
  into it.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying is ridiculous. I keep on hitting
• 1:04:35
  my mic grabbing mind. We we literally, I mean, if
• 1:04:41
  we're honest with ourselves, we literally are every single person
• 1:04:45
  are the people who have been indoctrinated into believing the
• 1:04:48
  lies of a world that tells us that things are impossible.
• 1:04:50
  That's if you think that it's impossible that God orchestrated
• 1:04:56
  these things to work out the way they did.
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 4: By definition, like yeah, yeah, which is but isn't it
• 1:05:02
  We don't really think about that.
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 3: We kind of are just stuck it.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 1: It doesn't feel natural to think about that. But it's like,
• 1:05:08
  or is that the devil just saying it doesn't feel natural?
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 4: That's exactly why. It's like, that's actually I think that's
• 1:05:15
  actually I think no. That is why they say your
• 1:05:18
  thoughts are not grown. You don't have to listen to them.
• 1:05:21
  It is because the word of God is what does
• 1:05:23
  not change, and so that's what that's what should determine truth.
• 1:05:28
  It's not what I think, or how I measure or
• 1:05:30
  where I compare things. It's like, okay, what does the
• 1:05:33
  word of God say? What is the voice of God?
• 1:05:36
  Because then when he says, my sheep will know my voice.
• 1:05:39
  It's because the more we're in tune with what he
• 1:05:41
  would say about this, then the closer we are to reality.
• 1:05:45
  And so when it is like, well, it's like I
• 1:05:47
  know God could work through this, it's like, no, God
• 1:05:50
  does work through that.
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 3: But I didn't think that.
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 4: But that is what's true, and so that's now how
• 1:05:56
  I live, and that is what I believe is the
• 1:05:59
  path to that is the path to freedom.
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 3: Yeah. See it's so weird because we sit in this.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 4: It's not a yes or no, but it but Jesus said,
• 1:06:11
  let your yes and you're know me no, anything else
• 1:06:14
  is from the evil one. So every time I'm like, well,
• 1:06:17
  maybe it's the then that's from the evil one because
• 1:06:19
  it has no clarity, there's no truth, there's no back
• 1:06:23
  and forth, there's.
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 2: No it's ambiguous. It's mislead.
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's not. It's nothing. It's it's confusing, it's unsure
• 1:06:35
  of itself. It's like, but the but light the way,
• 1:06:39
  the truth if you follow Jesus with everything is a yes,
• 1:06:43
  like yet if I say yes, I mean yes, and
• 1:06:45
  if I say no, I mean no. And you can
• 1:06:47
  say I don't know. But when it comes to your
• 1:06:50
  yes and yet yes and no, that's what it should be.
• 1:06:53
  So it's either this is the path to freedom, this
• 1:06:57
  is the path to freedom I've taken, or it's well
• 1:07:00
  I kind of think like maybe this is the path.
• 1:07:02
  Then I don't even believe that. So that's not the
• 1:07:05
  path of freedom for me. The path of freedom for
• 1:07:08
  me is I don't really know what the path of
• 1:07:09
  freedom is.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying.
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Well, it's like you could say yes, no, and
• 1:07:14
  I don't know, But you can't really just say I
• 1:07:17
  don't know.
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 3: Maybe yeah, right right.
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: Like that's just being like yeah, yeah, pushon. It's like,
• 1:07:22
  I mean, yeah, there's things you don't know. And if
• 1:07:23
  you don't know, it's like you could admit that, and
• 1:07:25
  it's not bad to not know stuff, right, So you
• 1:07:27
  can't like when you know that you don't know something,
• 1:07:32
  you can't fool yourself into thinking you might know it
• 1:07:36
  and then like I don't know. Maybe it's like I know,
• 1:07:39
  I don't know this. It's like how can I con
• 1:07:42
  How am I telling myself that, Well, there's I can
• 1:07:45
  explain it in this way. It's like, I know, I
• 1:07:47
  cannot do that, right, Why would I try to fool
• 1:07:49
  my you know?
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 4: And that has been the biggest that has been one
• 1:07:54
  of the biggest problems with So when I'm in you
• 1:07:57
  could call it spiritual direction, but really it's someone that
• 1:07:59
  knows how to listen to the Holy Spirit and knows
• 1:08:02
  love that.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 3: I talk with.
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 4: The problem is is that I will not say yes
• 1:08:07
  or no, and I will not stick with what's real
• 1:08:11
  because I'm always in like this floating mode of analyzing
• 1:08:14
  things and will hypothetically technically, if you compare it with this,
• 1:08:17
  oh physically, scientifically, spiritually, psychologically and all these different things,
• 1:08:22
  then it's like, okay, well, what's true? Fulton, I'm like,
• 1:08:26
  oh well, and I can't get to the core of it.
• 1:08:30
  But the core of it is like where my person is, like,
• 1:08:33
  here's a hot topic.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 4: It might not be the best thing that we're splitting
• 1:08:38
  up spiritual, physical, intellectual, relational, evangelical, because it's keeping us
• 1:08:43
  attached in this mindset that everything is all separated instead
• 1:08:46
  of there being a union of all of those things. Now,
• 1:08:49
  of course it's like spires the union, and it's helpful
• 1:08:52
  to be able to focus on certain things, but it
• 1:08:54
  would be real bad if we get lost, even more
• 1:08:57
  lost than we are now, into this separation of everything,
• 1:09:02
  and the losing of this is one thing, right, and
• 1:09:08
  that I'm one person and my experience is one thing,
• 1:09:11
  and it's it's not meant to be so split up, chaotic,
• 1:09:15
  divided like the devil is the spirit of division?
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 3: Why do we divide everything to better understand it? Do
• 1:09:22
  you see what I'm saying. That's a good topic. There
• 1:09:28
  have been a lot of good topics that we brought
• 1:09:30
  up in the world to.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: The last like twenty minutes. If you like, write this down,
• 1:09:33
  write this down. We'll talk about it later. But I
• 1:09:37
  think this is a great discussion.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 3: We probably don't want to keep too much longer.
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 4: But there's so much like the main thing this is where,
• 1:09:45
  this is what my heart has been called to for
• 1:09:48
  the longest time, is like this truth of it's either
• 1:09:52
  yes or it's no.
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 3: And if it's yes, then everything is yes. Either wrong
• 1:09:59
  and you should to ignore it completely, or it's right
• 1:10:02
  and you need to devote everything to it.
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 1: Yes, and you might not know race to which case
• 1:10:06
  you ask for the grace.
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 3: Yes, like yeah, there is real and the grace, But you.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: Ask for the grace because you know you will get
• 1:10:13
  that grace to tell you which.
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: Way to go. Yes, you know.
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: It's like it's this, it's a stick hanging up is
• 1:10:21
  it is it bad or is it good?
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 2: Which way does it fall?
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: And it's like when it's hanging up, I don't know,
• 1:10:26
  and it's like, Lord, give me the grace to figure
• 1:10:28
  out where it goes. And the gust of wind comes
• 1:10:29
  blows it one way, and you're like, well, there we go,
• 1:10:31
  thank you Lord.
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 4: So it's like, yeah, and what's beautiful is if it's
• 1:10:37
  fifty two percent it's that way, that's your no. And
• 1:10:41
  if it's fifty one percent on yes, yes, And if
• 1:10:44
  you do that, your life gets so much more clear
• 1:10:48
  because all of these games in your mind, personas everything
• 1:10:52
  else just get eviscerated because they've got no more room
• 1:10:56
  to live because your your life is towards the cross.
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: The path is narrow. I don't know what I was
• 1:11:06
  trying to bring that in, but we should. We should
• 1:11:08
  definitely make this a more like formal topic and discuss
• 1:11:12
  it in a formalized way in another video.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, anyway, it's all real. That was the thought of that.
• 1:11:20
  It is all real. It's true, shoot off off, shoot, whatever.
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 1: It's all real. This thing we're building up to, it's
• 1:11:26
  all real. All things point towards this spire.
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 3: And if you think, if you think it's just a symbol,
• 1:11:34
  then but I don't remember, oh my gosh, I can't
• 1:11:38
  remember what saying it was there was a saying who
• 1:11:40
  was talking about the eu Christ, and she said, if
• 1:11:42
  the Euchris is a symbol, then to hell with it,
• 1:11:45
  because I don't like who cares at that point. It's
• 1:11:48
  not a symbol. It's all real. It's more real than
• 1:11:52
  anything that we were experiencing here. But we will talk
• 1:11:54
  about that another time, probably multiple other times, because there's
• 1:11:58
  a lot to impact there. Do you guys have any
• 1:12:03
  final concluding remarks?
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 1: My mind is kanonfuddled, So God bless you.
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 3: That's good. I like, that's all I got.
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 1: All right, Well, let's end in a prayer. Does Fultimana
• 1:12:19
  lead us off?
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 3: Sure? Then? Of the fathers, I'm the Holy Spirit. Dear Goud,
• 1:12:25
  help Michael to finish this off in prayer really well?
• 1:12:27
  Right now? Yeah? Me do it? Yeah, Lord, Thank you
• 1:12:37
  for bringing all three of us here today. Thank you
• 1:12:42
  for opening up our hearts to listen to your Holy
• 1:12:48
  Spirit and bringing us closer to your truth. Because you
• 1:12:54
  are the truth. Help us to continue to knock or
• 1:13:04
  seek and knock and ask for the grace to pursue
• 1:13:08
  you more. And help us to not only lead ourselves,
• 1:13:18
  but lead others towards You with everything we do. Every
• 1:13:21
  single day in Jesus name, and.
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: Then then.
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 2: Amen, thank you very much. I see you
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 1: All right, Elvis