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How Do I Find Myself Again (The Identity Eraser Effect Explained) · Your Utmost Life

• 0:00
  Misty Celli: Hey, I'm so glad you're here today, and I mean that with all my heart.
• 0:03
  Misty Celli: I have been thinking about this episode all week.
• 0:06
  Misty Celli: I've been thinking about you specifically.
• 0:09
  Misty Celli: The woman who found this podcast, the woman who typed something into a search bar, maybe late at night, maybe in a parking lot before you walked into work, maybe on your phone in the bathroom with the door locked and you ended up here.
• 0:21
  Misty Celli: I know how you found me, because I know what you typed.
• 0:25
  Misty Celli: And I want you to know before we do anything else today, that the fact that you typed it, that is not weakness.
• 0:32
  Misty Celli: That is the bravest thing you've done in a long time.
• 0:35
  Misty Celli: This episode is for the woman who has a good life, a life that she's genuinely grateful for, but still feels empty.
• 0:42
  Misty Celli: It's for the woman who loves her family so deeply that the thought of them grips her heart, and yet she cannot reconcile that love with the hollow feeling underneath it.
• 0:52
  Misty Celli: It's for the woman who is functioning, showing up, getting it all done, and going through the motions of life she's not fully living.
• 0:59
  Misty Celli: If that is you, stay with me.
• 1:01
  Misty Celli: This one's for you.
• 1:02
  Misty Celli: You've been showing up for everyone.
• 1:04
  Misty Celli: The kids, the job, the relationship, the to-do list that never ends.
• 1:08
  Misty Celli: And somewhere in all of that, you caught a glimpse of yourself and realized you had no idea who you were anymore.
• 1:13
  Misty Celli: Not the roles, not the titles, you.
• 1:16
  Misty Celli: That quiet thought, is this all there is, isn't ingratitude or weakness.
• 1:20
  Misty Celli: It's a signal.
• 1:21
  Misty Celli: It means the woman you were made to be is still in there.
• 1:24
  Misty Celli: She never left.
• 1:25
  Misty Celli: She just got quieter as everything else got louder.
• 1:28
  Misty Celli: I miss you, Chella, the identity and self-leadership coach for ambitious mothers.
• 1:32
  Misty Celli: And this is your Upmost Life podcast, where ambitious mothers reclaim who they are and build a life that finally feels like theirs.
• 1:38
  Misty Celli: Every episode we do real work, not inspiration you forget by the time you start the car.
• 1:43
  Misty Celli: We reclaim your identity, protect your time, and design a life that feels like yours, on purpose, fully alive.
• 1:49
  Misty Celli: If you are ready to stop disappearing and start returning to yourself, you're in the right place.
• 1:54
  Misty Celli: Let's begin.
• 1:55
  Misty Celli: Here's what I want to tell you right out of the gate.
• 1:57
  Misty Celli: The reason you don't know where to start has nothing to do with how lost you are.
• 2:02
  Misty Celli: It has to do with something specific that happened to you, something that has a name.
• 2:07
  Misty Celli: And once you understand what it is, the not knowing stops being a wall and starts being a door.
• 2:12
  Misty Celli: We're going to talk about that today.
• 2:14
  Misty Celli: What it is, why it happened, and why understanding it is exactly where you start.
• 2:19
  Misty Celli: But first, I want to ask you something and I want you to actually answer it.
• 2:23
  Misty Celli: Not in your head, but feel it.
• 2:25
  Misty Celli: When was the last time you felt completely like yourself?
• 2:29
  Misty Celli: Not managing the schedule, not holding it all together, not performing the version of you that everyone needs.
• 2:35
  Misty Celli: Just you.
• 2:36
  Misty Celli: When was the last time?
• 2:38
  Misty Celli: Sit with that for a second, because that question matters.
• 2:41
  Misty Celli: And the fact that you had to think about it, that matters too.
• 2:45
  Misty Celli: I want to stay here with you for a few minutes before we go anywhere else, because I know where you are right now and I don't want to rush past it.
• 2:53
  Misty Celli: You can see it on your face when you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror.
• 2:57
  Misty Celli: Not in a dramatic way, not in a breakdown moment, but just a quiet recognition.
• 3:02
  Misty Celli: Who is that?
• 3:03
  Misty Celli: Not the wrinkles, not the tired eyes, but something deeper, something beyond the eyes.
• 3:09
  Misty Celli: A woman you remember but don't quite recognize anymore.
• 3:13
  Misty Celli: You feel the weight of it before your feet hit the floor in the morning, before you even open your eyes.
• 3:19
  Misty Celli: The list is already running, the schedule is already live, and underneath all of it, underneath the planning and the managing and the doing, there is this low, steady ache that you cannot name, shake, or explain to anyone who hasn't felt it.
• 3:34
  Misty Celli: There's a voice underneath all the noise that you've stopped letting yourself hear.
• 3:39
  Misty Celli: Not a dramatic voice, not a crisis voice, just a quiet one, persistent.
• 3:44
  Misty Celli: And she keeps whispering something you can't quite make out because everything else is so loud.
• 3:49
  Misty Celli: You are exhausted in a way that sleep doesn't fix.
• 3:53
  Misty Celli: You are living on autopilot and you know it.
• 3:56
  Misty Celli: And that knowing is its own kind of grief.
• 3:58
  Misty Celli: You love your life, you love your family, and you feel hollow in the middle of all of it.
• 4:04
  Misty Celli: And the guilt about the hollow feeling, that is its own weight on top of everything else.
• 4:10
  Misty Celli: That is not weakness, that is not ingratitude, it's not a character flaw.
• 4:15
  Misty Celli: That is a woman who's been carrying everything for everyone for a very long time, and she's tired, and she's allowed to be tired.
• 4:24
  Misty Celli: And here's what I want you to hear, really hear before we go any further.
• 4:28
  Misty Celli: You are not broken.
• 4:29
  Misty Celli: What you are feeling has a name, it has a cause, and it's not a verdict on who you are.
• 4:36
  Misty Celli: It's a description of what happened to you.
• 4:39
  Misty Celli: There is a difference, and that difference is everything.
• 4:42
  Misty Celli: Let me tell you what I think is happening inside your head right now, because I've heard it enough times to know it pretty well.
• 4:49
  Misty Celli: You're not sitting there thinking, I need a complete life overhaul.
• 4:53
  Misty Celli: You're thinking something much quieter and something much more specific.
• 4:57
  Misty Celli: You're thinking, I just want to feel like myself again.
• 5:01
  Misty Celli: I don't even know what that means anymore, but I miss her.
• 5:05
  Misty Celli: I miss me.
• 5:07
  Misty Celli: And underneath that, here's the thought that actually stops you.
• 5:11
  Misty Celli: I don't even know who I am anymore.
• 5:14
  Misty Celli: So I don't know where to start.
• 5:16
  Misty Celli: That one, that's the wall.
• 5:19
  Misty Celli: Not laziness, not lack of motivation, not caring enough.
• 5:23
  Misty Celli: It's that specific thought.
• 5:25
  Misty Celli: I don't know who I am anymore.
• 5:27
  Misty Celli: And because you don't know, you can't begin.
• 5:30
  Misty Celli: And because you can't begin, you stay stuck.
• 5:33
  Misty Celli: And because you stay stuck, the hollow feeling gets heavier, and around and around it goes.
• 5:40
  Misty Celli: You've probably tried things, you've probably read the books, downloaded the apps, made the lists, set the intentions on Sunday night, and lost them by Tuesday morning.
• 5:49
  Misty Celli: Not because you're not capable.
• 5:51
  Misty Celli: Truth is, you were trying to fix a behavior when what was broken was your identity.
• 5:57
  Misty Celli: And behavior attempts cannot fix identity wounds.
• 6:01
  Misty Celli: Those previous solutions were never going to work, not because of anything wrong with you, but because they were aimed at the wrong thing.
• 6:08
  Misty Celli: So here you are, Googling how do I find myself again and wondering if the answer even exists.
• 6:15
  Misty Celli: It does, and it starts not with knowing who you are, but with understanding why you feel like you don't.
• 6:22
  Misty Celli: I don't even know who I am anymore, so I don't even know where to start.
• 6:26
  Misty Celli: You've been saying some version of this to yourself, maybe out loud to a friend, maybe just in your own head at 2 a.m., or maybe both.
• 6:34
  Misty Celli: And here's the thing about that thought.
• 6:36
  Misty Celli: It feels completely true.
• 6:38
  Misty Celli: It feels like evidence, it feels like a reason to wait.
• 6:42
  Misty Celli: And I get why, I really do.
• 6:44
  Misty Celli: When you can't see the path forward, standing still feels like the only responsible choice.
• 6:49
  Misty Celli: You don't want to start in the wrong direction.
• 6:52
  Misty Celli: You don't want to waste the little time and energy you have on something that won't work.
• 6:56
  Misty Celli: That makes complete sense.
• 6:58
  Misty Celli: That's not failure.
• 6:59
  Misty Celli: That's a woman trying to be wise with what she has left.
• 7:02
  Misty Celli: But here's what that belief is costing you today, right now.
• 7:06
  Misty Celli: It's costing you the beginning.
• 7:08
  Misty Celli: Every day that you wait for clarity before you start is a day you spend on autopilot.
• 7:13
  Misty Celli: The hollow feeling doesn't go anywhere while you wait.
• 7:16
  Misty Celli: The ache doesn't take a break while you figure out who you are.
• 7:20
  Misty Celli: You wake up tomorrow exactly where you woke up today.
• 7:23
  Misty Celli: Except it's one more day of living a half-life that you didn't choose.
• 7:28
  Misty Celli: That is the cost today, not someday, today.
• 7:32
  Misty Celli: But that's not even the real cost.
• 7:34
  Misty Celli: Underneath that belief is something quieter and far more damaging.
• 7:39
  Misty Celli: The belief that you have to know who you are before you can start, that belief is quietly convincing you that you are the problem, that the reason you can't begin is something is wrong with you, something is missing in you, and every day you sit with that belief, it goes a little deeper, it builds a case.
• 7:57
  Misty Celli: You've been this way too long.
• 7:59
  Misty Celli: Maybe this is just who you are now.
• 8:02
  Misty Celli: Maybe you waited too long.
• 8:04
  Misty Celli: Maybe she really is gone.
• 8:06
  Misty Celli: That is the hidden cost, not just the lost days, but the accumulating evidence against yourself.
• 8:13
  Misty Celli: Evidence that isn't true but feels more true the longer the belief goes unchallenged.
• 8:18
  Misty Celli: Picture yourself five years from now, same Tuesday morning, same schedule, same hollow feeling, just heavier.
• 8:25
  Misty Celli: Not because anything terrible happened, but because nothing changed.
• 8:29
  Misty Celli: Because you kept waiting for clarity that didn't come.
• 8:33
  Misty Celli: Because the not knowing kept you exactly where you are now, just five years further in.
• 8:38
  Misty Celli: That woman at 2 a.m., 10 years from now, looking back at today at this exact moment, she would give anything to come back to right now, to start here right now, before another decade went by, before more of it slipped, before the woman she thought she would be became a grief she stopped allowing herself to feel.
• 9:00
  Misty Celli: That is the trajectory of this belief left unchanged.
• 9:04
  Misty Celli: I'm not saying that to scare you.
• 9:06
  Misty Celli: I'm saying it because you deserve to see it clearly, and because the version of you listening to this right now, the one who typed the search and found this episode, she is not that woman yet.
• 9:17
  Misty Celli: There is still everything in front of her.
• 9:19
  Misty Celli: You don't have to know who you are before you start.
• 9:23
  Misty Celli: You start and then knowing comes back through the starting.
• 9:26
  Misty Celli: The belief that clarity is the prerequisite has exactly backwards.
• 9:31
  Misty Celli: Clarity is not the starting line.
• 9:33
  Misty Celli: Clarity is what happens when you begin moving.
• 9:37
  Misty Celli: It's not the condition for the journey, it's the destination of it.
• 9:41
  Misty Celli: The reason that you feel like you don't know who you are anymore is not that she's gone.
• 9:46
  Misty Celli: It is that something specific happened to erase her, and that something has a name.
• 9:51
  Misty Celli: Once you see this, that wall of I don't know where to start begins to look very different.
• 9:57
  Misty Celli: It's called the identity eraser effect.
• 10:00
  Misty Celli: And here's what it is.
• 10:02
  Misty Celli: The identity eraser effect is what happens when a woman pours herself so completely into everyone else's lives out of love, out of fierce and devoted love, that her own identity gets gradually, quietly pushed to the background.
• 10:19
  Misty Celli: Not torn out or destroyed, but pushed to the background, drowned out, covered over by everyone else's rhythm until she can no longer hear her own.
• 10:30
  Misty Celli: It did not happen because she failed.
• 10:32
  Misty Celli: It happened because she loved.
• 10:34
  Misty Celli: She showed up completely for her family.
• 10:37
  Misty Celli: She put herself last because she believed that what she was doing was being a good mother.
• 10:43
  Misty Celli: She set aside her own needs because everyone else's felt more urgent and she was good at it.
• 10:49
  Misty Celli: She was so good at it, the best version of herself in every role she played for everyone else.
• 10:55
  Misty Celli: And in that process, not because she was weak, but because she was devoted, her own voice got quieter and quieter as everything else got louder and louder.
• 11:06
  Misty Celli: That is not a character flaw.
• 11:08
  Misty Celli: That is not a failure.
• 11:10
  Misty Celli: That is a consequence of love without limits.
• 11:13
  Misty Celli: I want to tell you about a woman.
• 11:17
  Misty Celli: She had two kids, a husband she loved, a career she had worked hard for.
• 11:22
  Misty Celli: From the outside, her life looked like everything.
• 11:25
  Misty Celli: But from the inside, she was running on empty in a way she couldn't explain to anyone.
• 11:30
  Misty Celli: She had tried the productivity systems, the self-care Sundays, the journaling, she read the books.
• 11:36
  Misty Celli: She told herself she just needed to be more disciplined, more consistent, more grateful.
• 11:42
  Misty Celli: And every attempt ran out of steam by week two.
• 11:45
  Misty Celli: Not because she wasn't trying, but because she was treating symptoms and calling them causes.
• 11:51
  Misty Celli: Claire wanted, underneath the goals and the plans and the systems, was something much simpler and much more human.
• 11:59
  Misty Celli: She just wanted to feel like herself again.
• 12:02
  Misty Celli: She missed the woman she used to be, the one with opinions about things that had nothing to do with anyone else's schedule, the one who knew what she wanted without having to ask permission.
• 12:14
  Misty Celli: She didn't want a new life.
• 12:15
  Misty Celli: She wanted back into the one she already had, but as herself, fully alive.
• 12:20
  Misty Celli: But every time she tried to start, she hit the same wall.
• 12:24
  Misty Celli: I don't even know who I am anymore.
• 12:26
  Misty Celli: So where do I begin?
• 12:28
  Misty Celli: It felt like trying to navigate to a destination when you don't even know your starting point.
• 12:34
  Misty Celli: She couldn't build something when she didn't know the foundation, and so she kept waiting for clarity, for the right moment, for enough energy, for a sign, and then something shifted.
• 12:46
  Misty Celli: She stopped trying to figure out who she was and she started looking at what made her feel like she wasn't.
• 12:53
  Misty Celli: She learned about the identity eraser effect, and for the first time she heard an explanation for what had happened to her that wasn't you failed yourself.
• 13:03
  Misty Celli: It was you loved without limits.
• 13:05
  Misty Celli: And in doing so, you drowned out your own voice.
• 13:09
  Misty Celli: And the path back is not about becoming someone new.
• 13:12
  Misty Celli: It's about learning to hear yourself again.
• 13:14
  Misty Celli: She was sitting at her kitchen table at 6.47 in the morning.
• 13:18
  Misty Celli: Everyone was still asleep.
• 13:19
  Misty Celli: She had coffee and she read those words.
• 13:22
  Misty Celli: She didn't leave.
• 13:23
  Misty Celli: She just got quiet.
• 13:25
  Misty Celli: And something in her chest unlocked.
• 13:28
  Misty Celli: She could feel it.
• 13:29
  Misty Celli: Not a dramatic feeling, but a quiet one.
• 13:32
  Misty Celli: Like something that had been held very tightly, finally, slightly released.
• 13:37
  Misty Celli: She wasn't broken.
• 13:39
  Misty Celli: She hadn't disappeared.
• 13:41
  Misty Celli: She had just stopped being able to hear herself underneath everything else.
• 13:46
  Misty Celli: And if she could stop being able to hear herself, that meant she could start again.
• 13:51
  Misty Celli: The direction existed.
• 13:53
  Misty Celli: The path was real.
• 13:55
  Misty Celli: She just needed to clear enough space to take the first step.
• 13:59
  Misty Celli: Six months later, Claire woke up on a regular Tuesday morning, nothing special about it, and made herself coffee before anyone else was awake.
• 14:08
  Misty Celli: She sat in the quiet and she had thoughts that were hers, not the schedule, not the list, but hers.
• 14:16
  Misty Celli: She knew what she was working towards.
• 14:18
  Misty Celli: She knew what she valued.
• 14:20
  Misty Celli: She had a 60-day goal that was bold and specific and entirely for herself.
• 14:25
  Misty Celli: And she had protected time on her calendar, real, held time to work toward it.
• 14:32
  Misty Celli: Same house, same family, same life.
• 14:35
  Misty Celli: A different woman standing in the middle of it.
• 14:37
  Misty Celli: A woman who knew who she was, who moved at her own rhythm.
• 14:41
  Misty Celli: What Claire found, what she arrived at through all of it, was this.
• 14:45
  Misty Celli: She had never been gone.
• 14:47
  Misty Celli: She had just gotten quiet, and quiet is not gone.
• 14:51
  Misty Celli: The ache she'd been carrying for years wasn't grief.
• 14:54
  Misty Celli: It was a knock, her own hand on the door, the woman she thought she lost, still in there, still breathing, still waiting to be chosen.
• 15:04
  Misty Celli: And she chose her.
• 15:05
  Misty Celli: I want to stay with you here for a minute because I know what happens in this part.
• 15:09
  Misty Celli: Something in you starts to look for the exit.
• 15:12
  Misty Celli: Maybe it sounds like, I don't have time for this, and I want you to hear me on that one specifically, because time is almost never the real thing.
• 15:20
  Misty Celli: What's underneath it is this.
• 15:22
  Misty Celli: You don't find time for yourself when some part of you doesn't believe you're worth the time.
• 15:28
  Misty Celli: That is not a calendar problem.
• 15:30
  Misty Celli: That is a worth problem.
• 15:32
  Misty Celli: And it is exactly where we start.
• 15:35
  Misty Celli: You don't need more hours.
• 15:37
  Misty Celli: You need to become the woman who protects those that she already has.
• 15:41
  Misty Celli: Or maybe the exit sounds like I've tried this before and it didn't work.
• 15:46
  Misty Celli: I hear this one all the time.
• 15:48
  Misty Celli: And here's why it's true.
• 15:51
  Misty Celli: Everything you tried before was aimed at behavior, a habit, a system, a routine.
• 15:57
  Misty Celli: Behavior attempts cannot fix identity wounds.
• 16:01
  Misty Celli: They were working at the wrong level.
• 16:03
  Misty Celli: It's like decorating a house that hasn't been built yet.
• 16:06
  Misty Celli: You can pick out the furniture, choose the paint, hang the art, and none of it has anywhere to go because the structure isn't there.
• 16:13
  Misty Celli: The foundation isn't poured.
• 16:15
  Misty Celli: That is why this is different.
• 16:18
  Misty Celli: We don't start with the decor, we start with the foundation, with who you are.
• 16:23
  Misty Celli: And when that is solid, everything else finally has something real to stand on, not by force, by nature.
• 16:31
  Misty Celli: Or maybe, and this one is the quietest, maybe it sounds like, I don't know if this will work for me.
• 16:39
  Misty Celli: My situation is different.
• 16:40
  Misty Celli: It is complicated.
• 16:42
  Misty Celli: I'm not asking you to start with hope.
• 16:45
  Misty Celli: Hope is a lot to ask for a woman who has already been disappointed.
• 16:50
  Misty Celli: I'm asking you to start with one question.
• 16:53
  Misty Celli: Not can I get there?
• 16:55
  Misty Celli: Just what if she's still in there?
• 16:58
  Misty Celli: That's it.
• 16:59
  Misty Celli: That's all curiosity requires.
• 17:01
  Misty Celli: No commitment, no certainty, just the willingness to consider that what I'm telling you today might be true.
• 17:08
  Misty Celli: Because here's what I know, and I mean this without any drama.
• 17:11
  Misty Celli: Another year of waiting has a cost.
• 17:14
  Misty Celli: You have already paid it.
• 17:16
  Misty Celli: You paid it last year, you paid it the year before.
• 17:19
  Misty Celli: The calm season does not arrive on its own.
• 17:22
  Misty Celli: It is built, and it is built by a woman who decided on a regular Tuesday, nothing special about it, that she was worth building it for.
• 17:31
  Misty Celli: You are allowed to want this, the full version, not the acceptable version, not the scaled back version, not the version you think you're allowed to want after everything you've set aside.
• 17:42
  Misty Celli: The full version.
• 17:43
  Misty Celli: You do not have to earn it first.
• 17:45
  Misty Celli: You do not have to be further along.
• 17:47
  Misty Celli: You do not have to deserve it any more than you already do.
• 17:51
  Misty Celli: You are allowed to want to feel fully alive.
• 17:54
  Misty Celli: That is not selfish.
• 17:55
  Misty Celli: That is the most important work you will ever do.
• 17:58
  Misty Celli: Right now, this Tuesday, you wake up and the list is already running before you open your eyes.
• 18:04
  Misty Celli: You move through the morning like you're managing someone else's life.
• 18:08
  Misty Celli: You are present in every room and absent from yourself.
• 18:11
  Misty Celli: The day happens to you.
• 18:13
  Misty Celli: You get to the end of it and something small and quiet inside you registers.
• 18:18
  Misty Celli: I was here, but I really wasn't here.
• 18:20
  Misty Celli: Now picture a different Tuesday.
• 18:22
  Misty Celli: Not a different life, the same one.
• 18:24
  Misty Celli: Same house, same kids, same kitchen, same husband.
• 18:27
  Misty Celli: But you wake up and there is something different in your chest.
• 18:30
  Misty Celli: A steadiness, like you know who you are before you've said a word to anyone.
• 18:35
  Misty Celli: You can see it and how you move through the morning, not rushed, not reactive.
• 18:39
  Misty Celli: You have a coffee ritual that is yours.
• 18:41
  Misty Celli: You sit with it for 10 minutes before the house wakes up.
• 18:45
  Misty Celli: Not because you found extra time, but because you decided this time was yours and you held it.
• 18:51
  Misty Celli: You can hear yourself thinking.
• 18:53
  Misty Celli: Your thoughts are not all about everyone else's.
• 18:56
  Misty Celli: Some of them, but a real number of them, are about what you're building, what you're after, what matters to you.
• 19:02
  Misty Celli: You have a goal that is bold and specific and completely yours, and you know exactly what you're doing today to move toward it.
• 19:10
  Misty Celli: You feel your own rhythm underneath the day.
• 19:12
  Misty Celli: Not fighting the schedule, but moving inside it, not performing the life, but inhabiting it.
• 19:18
  Misty Celli: The people you love most, they feel the difference.
• 19:20
  Misty Celli: Not because you're doing more, but because you are more present.
• 19:24
  Misty Celli: Because when you are in the room, you are actually there, and your children are watching a woman who chooses herself, who knows her worth, who moves like she belongs to herself.
• 19:33
  Misty Celli: That Tuesday is not a fantasy.
• 19:36
  Misty Celli: It is not a reinvented life.
• 19:37
  Misty Celli: It is this life with a different woman standing in the middle of it.
• 19:41
  Misty Celli: A woman who came back to herself, who heard the whisper, who chose to answer it.
• 19:46
  Misty Celli: She has been there the whole time.
• 19:48
  Misty Celli: You are just here to remember her.
• 19:49
  Misty Celli: The identity eraser effect is not a verdict, it is a description.
• 19:54
  Misty Celli: It happened because you loved without limits, because you were the best version of yourself in every role you played for everyone else.
• 20:01
  Misty Celli: And in doing so, your own voice got quieter as everything else got louder.
• 20:06
  Misty Celli: The belief that you have to know who you are before you can start has it backwards.
• 20:10
  Misty Celli: Plurity comes through the starting.
• 20:13
  Misty Celli: The not knowing is not a wall, it is the first door.
• 20:16
  Misty Celli: And the ache, the restlessness, the longing, and the 2 a.m.
• 20:19
  Misty Celli: grief, that is not proof that she is gone.
• 20:22
  Misty Celli: That is proof that she is still there.
• 20:24
  Misty Celli: She didn't leave.
• 20:25
  Misty Celli: She got quiet, and quiet is not gone.
• 20:28
  Misty Celli: I want to leave you with something to carry out of here.
• 20:31
  Misty Celli: Say this with me, or just let it land.
• 20:33
  Misty Celli: I am a woman whose utmost self is already inside me.
• 20:37
  Misty Celli: She has been whispering, and now I hear her.
• 20:40
  Misty Celli: I don't need to know everything before I start.
• 20:43
  Misty Celli: I just need to take the next step and I am ready to take it.
• 20:47
  Misty Celli: Before you close this episode, I want to name something.
• 20:51
  Misty Celli: Within the hour, maybe sooner, a voice is going to show up.
• 20:54
  Misty Celli: It's going to say something like, Who do you think you are?
• 20:58
  Misty Celli: You've tried this before.
• 21:00
  Misty Celli: Nothing changes.
• 21:01
  Misty Celli: That voice is the identity eraser effect trying to reassert itself.
• 21:07
  Misty Celli: It is not the truth.
• 21:08
  Misty Celli: It is the pattern protecting itself.
• 21:10
  Misty Celli: Answer it with this.
• 21:12
  Misty Celli: I am a woman who chose herself today, and I will choose her again tomorrow.
• 21:17
  Misty Celli: If this episode met you somewhere real today, will you leave a review?
• 21:21
  Misty Celli: 30 seconds, because there is a woman out there right now searching for exactly this.
• 21:26
  Misty Celli: Your words help her find it.
• 21:28
  Misty Celli: And if someone came to mind while you were listening, a friend, a sister, someone you know is living on autopilot, just send it to her.
• 21:36
  Misty Celli: You don't have to explain it, just let her know.
• 21:39
  Misty Celli: Next week, we're going deeper into the identity eraser effect.
• 21:43
  Misty Celli: Specifically, the drains.
• 21:45
  Misty Celli: The things quietly pulling you away from yourself right now.
• 21:49
  Misty Celli: Because you cannot build the life you want while the drains are running.
• 21:53
  Misty Celli: You are more than everyone's everything.
• 21:56
  Misty Celli: You are someone.
• 21:57
  Misty Celli: I'll see you next week.